In this final episode, Eleanor and Polly look back over their time together in doing the podcast and they assess where humanity seems to be standing in regard to war and wisdom. They reflect on the state of war and why humans return repeatedly to armed polarization, called “war.” And they talk about other options for polarization – being able to talk about our differences in a humanized way. Why is that still apparently unachievable? How does humane dialogue relate to mindfulness? Why are we stu...
Nov 09, 2023•45 min•Season 1Ep. 50
In this episode, we discuss the meaning of curiosity as a primary emotion and how it is expanded or restricted, throughout our development from infancy through old age, by conscious and unconscious factors. Curiosity or “interest” motivates us to engage with our experiences in ways that we can learn from them. The human infant is born with a primary motivation to investigate its experiences with curiosity, even when they are painful. Naturally, our curiosity help us survive by allowing us to dis...
Oct 14, 2022•46 min•Season 1Ep. 49
Why is it so hard to hear and feel another person’s meaning when you are in difficult conversations? Even though you may love the other person, when they speak about something that “makes you angry,” you may find it’s impossible to hear anything except your own thoughts. When we feel emotionally threatened, we protect ourselves and promote our own points. This is universal. Everyone closes their ears to anything except their own thoughts when they feel insulted or emotionally threatened. The sec...
Sep 22, 2022•52 min•Season 1Ep. 48
In this podcast, we talk about how and why a speaker should LOWER emotional threat if that person wants to be seen, heard, and felt accurately. We don’t have to “be nice” or even “be kind,” be we have to limit ourselves to our own experience in speaking (not using “we” or “you” or claim to know “the facts”). Being able to speak subjectively (only for yourself) means that you do not speak for someone else’s reality, perceptions, or feelings. Listening to this podcast you will learn how to lower e...
Sep 06, 2022•1 hr 1 min•Season 1Ep. 47
How do Homo Sapiens get and control power? What do we mean by power and how does it relate to influencing others or taking control? What is “true power” that can sustain us through our difficulties and “false power” that leads only to fears and misgivings? In this podcast, we will contemplate power and vulnerability, and how they function in our relationships, our aging, and our health.
Jun 01, 2022•32 min•Season 1Ep. 46
What is death? Is it a flat-lining on the EEG in which the brain goes quiet? Is it cardiac arrest, the stopping of the heart? Is it the departing of consciousness from the body? Why does our definition of death change? If we cannot define death, how do we understand our fear of it? What’s the difference, for example, between what we feel about different kinds of death – e.g. “natural” death, murder, and accidental death? In this episode, we will explore the meanings of death in our own experienc...
Apr 04, 2022•30 min•Season 1Ep. 45
What is death? Is it a flat-lining on the EEG in which the brain goes quiet? Is it cardiac arrest, the stopping of the heart? Is it the departing of consciousness from the body? Why does our definition of death change? If we cannot define death, how do we understand our fear of it? What’s the difference, for example, between what we feel about different kinds of death – e.g. “natural” death, murder, and accidental death? In this episode, we will explore the meanings of death in our own experienc...
Mar 23, 2022•29 min•Season 1Ep. 44
What is death? Is it a flat-lining on the EEG in which the brain goes quiet? Is it cardiac arrest, the stopping of the heart? Is it the departing of consciousness from the body? Why does our definition of death change? If we cannot define death, how do we understand our fear of it? What’s the difference, for example, between what we feel about different kinds of death – e.g. “natural” death, murder, and accidental death? In this episode, we will explore the meanings of death in our own experienc...
Mar 08, 2022•41 min•Season 1Ep. 43
There are many public debates about “free speech” in terms of limiting “hate speech” that includes insults, hostility, or slander against others, especially “vulnerable others.” In this podcast we discuss how speech (the ways we speak to ourselves and others) plays a central role in ceding or avoiding war and chaos. We will compare “free speech,” as defended in the US Constitution, with Right Speech as promoted in the Eightfold Noble Path of the Buddhist practice. Right Speech is divided into fo...
Feb 15, 2022•31 min•Season 1Ep. 42
There are many public debates about “free speech” in terms of limiting “hate speech” that includes insults, hostility, or slander against others, especially “vulnerable others.” In this podcast we discuss how speech (the ways we speak to ourselves and others) plays a central role in ceding or avoiding war and chaos. We will compare “free speech,” as defended in the US Constitution, with Right Speech as promoted in the Eightfold Noble Path of the Buddhist practice. Right Speech is divided into fo...
Feb 07, 2022•45 min•Season 1Ep. 41
Episode 40: What is Propaganda? How Can We Tell That We Are Being Persuaded by False or Fake Narratives? Part 2 with Polly Young-Eisendrath, Ph.D. and Eleanor Johnson with special guest Robert Caper In this second part of this podcast, we will explore the nature of propaganda and how easy it is to believe in rhetoric that is based on false assumptions. How can a listener/reader/consumer discern whether there are facts and evidence backing any particular report, statement, or argument? Is there s...
Sep 30, 2021•44 min•Season 1Ep. 40
In this podcast, we will explore the nature of propaganda and how easy it is to believe. How can a listener/reader/consumer discern whether there are facts and evidence backing any particular attitude, statement or marketing? Is there some way to know if something is likely to be true or false when you read about it or hear? What is “confirmation bias” and how does it function in relation to propaganda? What about the scientific standard of “falsification”? We will talk especially about medical,...
Jun 29, 2021•32 min•Season 1Ep. 39
NEW EPISODE of Enemies: From War to Wisdom is now live! Episode 38 (Part 2): What Is “Crowd Psychology”? How Does It Affect Individuals and Groups with Polly Young-Eisendrath, Ph.D. and Eleanor Johnson with special guest Robert Caper Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis, believed that crowd behavior (sometimes called “mob psychology”) leads to unlocking the unconscious mind in becoming identified with a “group mentality” in the slogans or motivations of a charismatic leader. More contemp...
Mar 03, 2021•35 min•Season 1Ep. 38
Sigmund Freud, the founder of psychoanalysis, believed that crowd behavior (sometimes called “mob psychology”) leads to unlocking the unconscious mind in becoming identified with a “group mentality” in the slogans or motivations of a charismatic leader. More contemporary theories of crowd behavior, such as psychologist Philip Zimbardo’s idea of “deindividuation,” claim that anonymity and group unity can persuade people to lose their concern for others, and reduce their sensitivity to guilt, remo...
Jan 08, 2021•36 min•Season 1Ep. 37
In the arena of entangled and often painful human relationships, the mother-daughter relationship may be paramount. If you think about it for a moment, you realize that every woman on earth has been inside of another woman, and then come out and had to differentiate or at least grow apart from that original home. Women are far too often alienated from within themselves, divided against themselves, their bodies, and each other. Without blame, we may need to see that the mother-daughter bond has t...
Nov 02, 2020•49 min
In part two of this episode, we will talk about the theory offered by contemporary cognitive scientist Donald Hoffman to explain why our natural desires and fears do not lead us to insights about “reality.” We will review some of Hoffman’s model and approach which are still very much a work-in-progress. We are taking up Hoffman’s work on this podcast because we feel it offers an extraordinarily promising view of our human predicament in regard to our own self-protection and can help us sort out ...
Oct 05, 2020•40 min•Season 1Ep. 35
In this episode, we will talk about the theory offered by contemporary cognitive scientist Donald Hoffman to explain why our natural desires and fears do not lead us to insights about “reality.” We will review some of Hoffman’s model and approach which are still very much a work-in-progress. We are taking up Hoffman’s work on this podcast because we feel it offers an extraordinarily promising view of our human predicament in regard to our own self-protection and can help us sort out confusions a...
Sep 14, 2020•41 min•Season 1Ep. 34
In 1958, psychologist Fritz Heider originated “attribution theory” in psychology. This theory tried to answer the question: How do people make sense of what happens to them? How do they hold themselves and others responsible or not responsible without knowing the actual causes or evidence for behavior? A related theory developed by psychologist Julian Rotter in 1954 is called “Locus of Control” and looks at how we reason about our own and other’s motivations. In this podcast, we will discuss the...
Jul 14, 2020•48 min•Season 1Ep. 33
In this podcast, we talk about the philosophy and meaning behind our logo of a white peace dove that is caught in a red interdiction circle – either wholly caught or partly escaping. Of course, the dove is a symbol of peace or harmony, or even a peace offering when it has an olive branch in its beak, as pictured in our logo. The red interdiction circle is an international symbol used on highways and products and written communications to mean “no,” “nay” or “prohibited.” Our symbol of the dove t...
Jun 15, 2020•41 min•Season 1Ep. 32
Years ago, there was a saying that came out of family psychiatry, especially in working with families of young adults with severe psychological disorders. It went like this, “When it comes to parents, there’s the help that hurts and the hurt that helps” – meaning that it is very difficult to know how much we can really help when loved ones are in need or in trouble (especially when they are teens or adults), and how much we need to allow them to find their own way. In this episode, we will talk ...
May 29, 2020•48 min•Season 1Ep. 31
On earlier podcasts, we have talked about what it means to be a human being, an individual person who has a complex experience of seeing, hearing and feeling. On this episode we will go into the details of the individual world of being human and why it’s so hard for us to agree about what is happening from moment to moment. Our perceptions of “reality” are between about 45% and 85% individual at any given moment. That means we are not in the “same world” and consequently we don’t share the same ...
May 01, 2020•1 hr 9 min•Season 1Ep. 30
At this crucial juncture when we are beginning to contemplate our return to “life outside,” when the lock-down is over, we especially need to be reflective, thoughtful, and open-minded. The famous poet and artist William Blake wrote “Without Contraries, No Progress” in his famous poem “The Marriage of Heaven and Hell.” In this episode, we will talk about the importance of all sides of the conversation being included in our coming to terms with what is next, regarding this virus, our economy, and...
Apr 22, 2020•44 min•Season 1Ep. 29
More than three centuries ago in 1793, the great poet and artist William Blake said, “Without Contraries is no progression. Attraction and Repulsion, Reason and Energy, Love and Hate, are necessary to Human existence.” And then in 1916, the imminent psychoanalyst Carl Jung wrote as though he were speaking to us today, “The present shows with appalling clarity how little able people are to let the other man’s argument count, although this capacity is a fundamental and indispensable condition for ...
Apr 14, 2020•42 min•Season 1Ep. 28
Humiliation is the experience of being exposed in our weaknesses and losing our social status in a couple or group. Being humiliated naturally evokes rage as a protective mechanism because an individual feels undermined and loses face in front of others. As we have pointed out many times on the podcast, human beings are naturally self-promoting and self-protective in groups and families. The humiliation-rage cycle is an interactive cycle between two people or groups who use shaming and blaming o...
Mar 21, 2020•47 min•Season 1Ep. 27
Polly and Jill continue their conversation with psychoanalyst Robert Caper (expert on projective identification) about the emotional kidnapping and confusion that occur in unconscious communication in couples, other dyads, and groups when people get emotionally activated. This is the second part of a conversation about Projection and Projective Identification.
Jan 25, 2020•39 min•Season 1Ep. 26
(Part 1) Why are even simple topics often difficult to discuss, especially if people have different viewpoints? Underlying many confusions and animosities in human interactions in couples and groups is a form of unconscious emotional communication that implies and evokes strong reactions in ways that usually fall outside our awareness. We suddenly feel triggered, trapped, or kidnapped into an emotional reality that we had not intended. This kind of communication may be positive or idealized, as ...
Jan 13, 2020•36 min•Season 1Ep. 25
When people are preparing to go through a wedding – whether it’s their first or not – they often dream they are dying or are about to attend a funeral instead of a wedding. Why does monogamous commitment to another person, who is an equal, tend to bring up deep anxiety and even hostility towards that person? In this episode, we are going to explore the Buddha’s teachings of impermanence and limitation in relation to the fears that many of today’s adults, young and old, have of marriage and commi...
Nov 28, 2019•37 min•Season 1Ep. 24
There are now many studies that demonstrate how successful white women will undermine other high-status women instead of sharing resources, praise or support. If you are a working white woman, especially if you are in a position of leadership or management in a stressful setting, you have probably noticed that your fans are not other White women around who are also trying to be successful. Traditionally, White women have relied on veiled competition with each other, giving the illusion of being ...
Oct 29, 2019•57 min•Season 1Ep. 23
You have heard the saying “No good deed goes unpunished” and you know there is a wisdom in it. But what is that wisdom? In today’s podcast, we are going to talk about a human condition that occurs in families and with friends: There is an unequal need or dependency between supposed equals (e.g. a grown-up child who needs to live with parents) and the dependent party becomes very resentful and ungrateful. The providing party is hurt and angry at the lack of recognition of generosity. This is a cl...
Oct 22, 2019•50 min•Season 1Ep. 22
In this podcast, Polly Young-Eisendrath, Ph.D., Sarah Brodie, M.A. and Eleanor Johnson explore the meaning of “free will” and some of the arguments for and against it. They talk about free will in the context of the timeless “laws” or guidelines for how to develop our intentions wisely: The Ten Commandments, the five basic moral principles of Buddhism, and the Golden Rule. They will emphasize the nature of human negativity and hostility in relation to our natural reactions on an interpersonal an...
Sep 18, 2019•58 min•Season 1Ep. 21
