Self diagnosing episode

Welcome to this episode of Emergency Intercom.

Today, we are going to be teaching you the simplest ways to attend, simple.

Hacks to make your life smoother, more pleasurable, and exciting, because all you need in life is some pleasure and excitement to keep you going. That's why me and you were so lucky we have each other, because I'm pleasure, he's excitement.

Help me.

Were you gonna say something? Before we started? You were like, what was it saying? But you didn't say anything. You were just like whispering to yourself.

I just thought about like something I sent my sister this morning, and I was like, what the fuck was that video? I send that? But then I looked at the thumbnail and saw what it was.

Yeah, you saw, you saw.

Saw that's my text and drawl coming out I draw. I saw that's all I got. Yeah, my pillow.

Now you say pillow, right, pillow? I need a new mattress so bad. But what they don't tell you is those things are so expensive. That's what they don't tell you. See how everybody's like, oh, they don't tell you about taxes when you know they don't tell you that the reason your parents let you sleep on the same dusty ass mattress for twenty years of your life. Is because they literally cost way too fucking much money. Like there's no way they need to be costing.

That much money.

Yeah, there's like a seven hundred percent markup on all mattresses. And if you go into a mattress store and you're like all I have is four hundred dollars and it's a twelve hundred dollars mattress, they will probably take that deal. Like you can talk people down on mattresses like crazy, but I understand like the price of a mattress sometimes because I'm like, you literally spend half of your life on that thing, like invest in a good fucking mattress, like make sure you get good sleep.

I literally can't get myself to do it, Like I would genuinely rather buy a pair of shoes, like expensive shoes than buy a new mattress, because you can't take the mattress and show the mattress off.

Because you're a girl and you're like buying clothes.

Yeah, Like my.

Girlly instinct is just like, erg, how am I gonna get my nails and my hair done if I get a mattress?

Shiny dope, shiny squirrel squirrel friends, you are my squirrel friend? Like what? Well?

Also, last night before I went to bed, I like couldn't fall asleep, So I was doing something that I never do, which was looking through my DM replies and I never do this, but it set me on a spiral of like people seeing what people reply to. And there are certain stories that like every DM I opened, somebody had replied to that same picture. But one DM

They bodied you. So yeah, I was fully body, that's fucking crazy.

Then okay, But then I thought, with my positive thinking, I was like, maybe this is somebody who just like you know how you like I'll send things to myself to my private account and like back and forth. So maybe that's just somebody doing that, Like they don't have a private account, so they're just like, this bitch is never going to see this shit. I'm just going to send what I want to save. But there is the same feature, so I don't know why she.

Would Also maybe they were just saying like she needs to work out.

Yeah, but like not in like a mean way, but like I want you to live forever way exactly, and you should work out and keep your body.

Yeah, we can spend anything to be positive. Why don't more people do that's just like make everything happy? Like everyone that bullies me in like the comments, like they're probably like thirty percent of those people that are being serious and like actually making fun of me. But I have this like delusional thought pattern where I'm like, oh no, they're like also in on their joke, Like there there

I think it's especially when it's like somebody who's not in our like close circle doing that.

It's like why are you attacking me? Like why are you literally attacking me in my livelihood?

Like you actually fucking hate me and you have some weird thing about me behind closed doors.

But because that's like a funny girl. Yeah, I know that.

We just have weird, funny things of people behind closed doors.

Did I tell you the thing that happened to me in New York? It was like two trips ago. I think it was outside of something that we DJed when we were DJing shit and this girl came up and she was like, what's up, you stupid stinky bitch.

Oh I think you did tell us this that. She was just like, it's.

Like what and she was like, oh uh, I'm sorry. I just like that's what they do to you on the podcast. So I just was and then we just had like a normal conversation after that. But I was like, got so destabilized and you.

Had to rewire her brain.

It's literally it's because we like wire people's brains incorrectly with this fucking podcast. So people think it's normal to go up to other people and be like, hey, you fucking weird freak bitch, and that's not the way you should be talking to Like, that's just simply.

That's how we talk to each other, and that's okay. Actually, you know what I've been thinking about is like, literally, how you are the most lovely, like kind person I've ever met. You're just so genuine.

You have not been thinking about that. There's no way you've been sitting there.

I just like I was just deep into thought thinking about that, Like.

Just now, are you trying to like tell me that you were sitting on your iPhone in your room doing that? Drew does Drew in the way he uses his phone actually freaks me out. And what he buys on the internet freaks me out. We are living in an age where you could buy anything you could ever wish on your iPhone, and Drew sits on there and buys like fucking weird germs that live in the sea that like turn blue when you shake them, and fucking candy.

It's not even gonna show because it's daytime, but.

I'm gonna show them.

Like in daytime, it's literally just a glass of water.

Okay, So these are fuck I literally forgot the name. They're not Dietamacious, they're d fuck what are they called? Dinoflagellites? And of course they're the ship. They're basically like they go up onto the shore every once in a while, and like it's the blue glow that you see like in the wave break or you see like people wading through the water, and they react to water movement, so

So he has invisible pets, that's what he's well, no, you can kind of visible.

Pets kind of just looks like backwash.

Yeah, like it looks like your toothbrush cup.

Yeah. So these are the loves. These are the loves of my life. And I replaced my praying mantis. Go gi, rest in peace.

Who don't know about your dead bug.

There's a lot of people that that you killed. I know, I come to the conclusion that she got jealous. That's really actually.

Here's my theory.

My hypothesis is Drew accidentally killed that bug because you took it out in the most toxic environment ever. You took it out in a fucking California parking lot and it flew around summer.

Yeah, oh, I thought that was yours got lost because they were like, that's not gonna fly for another one live.

Like longer than yours are.

Now, Yeah, a lot longer.

Yeah, you're just a bad father, and you should take that into account when you think of you're producing with somebody, because you definitely should not have kids.

Oh damn no, I think genuinely what happened was they sold me like a dying one, yeah, like an older one, and they just were like trying to get rid of it because I did get it on sale one and it was like the end of the day and two and three. I think it was like way more like developed than they even they knew, or they let on, Yeah, let me on to.

Know, because like a immediately shed when it got.

In the house too, or Kai is sniffing his armpits like crazy that's you know.

I usually I'll make fun of him, but I can condone that because i'd rather, you know, if you stink like doo dooo dog shit.

New and fix it. So I'm just kind of, well, what's the Yeah, we'll believe it because.

Yeah, okay, it's.

Oh no you.

Oh you, but I'm using a different string.

Is it aluminum free?

It's aluminum.

We need to put aluminum back in the ideodorant. I knew I smelled something when you walked in the room. I didn't know what it was, but now I know.

I wasn't gonna say did it smell good? No?

Why would it like it didn't smell it was getting.

They get compliments ki to me, they get silence.

To me, it smelled good, likely like your pheromones or not.

No, yeah, that's coming from a sexual place and you should write that down.

Okay, so we all know how I can't read like that is like a real thing. I don't know how to read. Like you should see me do the ad read, which like maybe we'll add like a clip of me like doing an ad read where I like try to get the same thing thirty six times a row. But it just like I freaked the funk out because I literally.

Literally everyone needs to evacuate the room. Yeah, mine, Drew has to read something out loud.

My eyes Like what happens is my eyes read the words way too quickly and my mouth can't light.

So you're just too smart to be able to see.

Exactly exactly, No, I just can't focus on the one thing at hand. Well, I found this new method of reading called bionic reading, and it highlights the first half of the word.

Because I think that was the thing that Bella Thorne literally talked about on Disney And I'm not even kidding.

It highlights the first half of the word, or bolds the first three letters. And I swear to god, it was like I put on like those seeing color glasses, like for the first time that logan Paul had like a meltdown with like people who don't see color.

Oh wait, he pretended like he couldn't see right, I don't think I think he actually might have been color blind.

Oh what did he get it fixed?

Because now he maybe he just exists as a color blind person because you can live when there's like different varyings. I mean, but I read this one morning laying in my bed, and I read it out loud to myself because I was like, there's no way this works. And it genuinely like made me tear up because I was like, what the fuck? I can like actually read this, like all the way through.

Reading that out loud, even alone, because reading out loud alone is really embarrassing.

Well, I just needed to see if it worked, because that's my problem. I can read inside my head, but I cannot read or it's hard for me to come imprehend. But when I have to speak out loud when I'm reading something, everything goes wrong. Everything goes wrong.

But yeah, you give us an example.

Read it.

But if I fuck up like that, you.

Do really really good.

And then what if you do so good that somebody hits us up and they're like, we need you to be the next host of the Grand Spelling Bee, And then you're just like wow in the grammar world.

Okay, I'll try the without it, and then i'll do it with. Yeah, bionic reading is a new method facilitating the reading process. Okay, I'm doing the one with because I know it already. It's it's it's a failed experiment because I already did it, Like I already know what's coming next, like I know how it's gonna go, like you know the.

Words, but sometimes I can mess you up even more because then you think you know the words, because that fucks me up when I'm like reading something out loud or like candied, like it's like okay, like here's a script, and then I say it right the first time or what I think is right, and someone's like, oh, well, you added a word, and it's because I was like I already know.

This, and then I always add like a filler word.

M All right, let's try let's tryl be scared. Okay, I'm gonna really try hard.

Now you literally know how Bella felt on those fucking Disneys. No, it's true they paid her for those extra apps because like, why were they.

Doing that to her?

They like ruined her, they like slandered her.

Though they like made her the poster child when she was just supposed to be like an actress in a show, like she was the poster child for dyslexia.

She had to have been paid.

For that, though, I probably. I mean, those Disney contracts are fucking horrifying. I know, like they're really really scary. But okay, reading is a new method facilitating the reading process by guiding eyes through text with artificial fixation points. As a result, the reader is only focusing on a highlighted initial letter and lets the brain center complete the word. It's pretty good, like y'all, Yes, someone made a Google Chrome extension, but like y'all have seen weird.

Yeah, ionic reading is a new method facilitating the reading.

Well, I can just read.

Yeah. I think it was actually very impressive that we need to get the add coffees.

I know you don't have literally a meltdown and you're like, I'm gonna do that.

That was really sexy seeing you read the sentence thank you. Yeah. I looked at the logan Paul thing and it said that he did kind of fake it. It was a quote it says, I wanted to create an amazing story, an amazing piece of content that shows what it meant to be color blind. Just like any storyteller, I exaggerated my reactions. I did not lie. What I did was embellish.

That's basically yeah, that's just me when I lie.

That's literally me.

Anytime I read a joke off of TikTok to somebody, I always add embellishments. To it because I'm like embarrass because I'm like, what if they don't think this is funny? And I basically changed the joke when I'm reading it out, and then the person usually laughs with the card and.

I'm like, yeah, well I actually made that joke, so now do you ever do that?

I get really embarrassed to read things I find funny on my iPhone, so I just fake it and I'm like, oh, this wasn't as funny as like I thought it was, so then I like I add I added little to it.

I just read whatever comes on my iPhone out loud wherever I am at any moment, Like if something funny like a funny tweet pops up like Oryan's the same way, We'll just like see it and read it out loud and just say it and make everybody laugh and then keep scrolling until the next one comes up, like it's crazy I.

Read deleted TikTok oh.

But also that the dyslexic thing came up because last night I saw a YouTube video that was like a dyslexia test, and he was like, obviously this isn't the way to like know, you should go to a professional, but this is the test that a lot of professionals use, and I think it was like some number like ninety four percent of people who like go in to take it usually come out the other end and are like, oh, yeah, I actually do have like a minor form of dyslexia,

Taught himself English, so I don't think he counts like my dad the way.

If someone's all the way my dad text, it would be crazy.

But I understand it. But it's literally because.

It's ever seen.

It's like it's saying. Because also, if you hear my dad talk like, he does not sound like that.

I also think it's part of laziness. Like the way my dad text, it's fully like laziness.

It's just giving Dad core. Like Dad's text messages are like literally the worst, like most offensive, like soulless, emotionless thing you can ever receive on your life. And I think that's it.

Always feels like he's angry at me. When we're texting.

It's like, hey, my dad literally says kay, and like he doesn't realize that that's like actually.

Yeah, my dad says okay. He goes, how are you? Yeah?

And I said good and you, And then I said I need that hoodie because he sent me a picture of this girl wearing a hoodie said if you heard anything bad about me, believe all that shit and leave me the fuck alone. And my dad's all that and thought of to me. I was like, I need that hoodie. He's like, he goes, goo, are you in New York? I just made the tuna salad e phil oof really good? What?

Yeah. He I think it is definitely out of laziness because if you heard my dad talk read but also I'm like delusional and I don't think my dad has an accent, but everybody who meets him is like that man fully has an act by.

An accent, but it's like it's it's like, yeah, it's not like the craziest thing.

But yeah, if you heard him talk, you wouldn't think these were his text messages. I think he just doesn't want to They don't dn it to you think it's finished.

That's one of his texts. I'm not even kidding.

Hi, hi note ihow remember that you had payment on it. They don't dn it to you Like that's I'm saying, they don't send it to you until it's finished. And he said, they don't dne it to you until it's finished.

Yeah, let me check a text for my dad. Okay, you're no.

No.

He sent me a picture of a tesla and he said, isn't this so slay Elon Musk is literally mother.

He did not say that, bitch.

All right, let's see what my dad.

I was like, Well, your dad is like so interconnected into your life and wanting to understand what you do that he's like he's learning. He's learning the language of the podcast. Like ay I it's like, hey, I.

Trying to learn.

My dad says, you aren't in gay bitch.

No, wait, let me see. Oh my god, dud, that's fucked up.

That's not We're gonna have to cut that.

Like he's I hope you die. See it's like funny shit.

Like that, like where that's not funny.

No, it's like your dad's being like a full sentence. Yeah, it's like cold and soulless, like you know, like but it's like chill.

I don't think that's chill.

I think that's you will burn in hell with the rest of them. I don't know who them is. No, I think he's, oh, this one's just die die, Die, Die die. He's he's referencing Wendy Williams death to all of them.

I don't know.

I don't think he is. I think you need to have a sit down with your dad.

Figure figures well, anytime I try to talk to him, he's like, I gotta go to work, and like, you never I've never seen him. I haven't seen him in like ten years, for longer than like eight seconds.

Wait, but I literally hung out with him for a long time, but I guess you were outside the whole time.

Damn, I didn't even realize that. Yeah, he was avoiding you.

Yeah, it's very avoidant, but like it's in like a fun, playful hide and see.

I don't think so, because he kept he would be like, hey, like literally, let me know when Drew's coming back in because I gotta go.

Why would you not tell me that?

Well, because I felt like I was imposing, Like what am I supposed to be? Like, no, you're my friend, I know, but I'm his friend too because he's lit.

Dude, My dad is such a psycho, like like genuinely a psycho, because like he gave Enya and O'Ryan money like for their flights home, Like.

When are me and O Ryan's flights were literally free? Basically yeah, he's points.

Yeah, and he was like give this to them and I was like, no, they're not gonna take this. They don't want this, like stop and he was like, well, I like paid for like families flights and I was like, you didn't pay for my fucking flight, Like what are you talking about?

Like, well, you're not a girl, so you should technically be able to just like cover for yourself.

Yeah, you know what I mean.

I have a wonderful relationship with my father. Okay, although that was a joke, and I love my dad very much and he loves me back.

Oh my god, I would say that if I was lying too.

Yeah, now you're covering up for him.

I know I have. Yeah. Can you guys hold my father accountable? Please? He doesn't give me the love I deserve.

We are so lucky because we love our peapas, our papas.

You're my Oh my god, you're drinking on the job. What you're drinking on the job.

No, I'm not. There's a paper bag.

Wow that does it cover that you're drinking on the job?

Wow, it's in this bag.

Open it. This is the third time he's drink on the job, are you Why would you lie? Why would you lie? We said it's alcohol, you said no, it's just.

Noticed the crack of the cues because he.

Was the loudest down on the planet.

Loud cra I've just been stressed out, you know, like.

It's literally nine am.

I was gonna say, it's like so fucking early.

Is this even your first one? Because you were acting a little weird.

And you did smell really bad.

My third one doesn't matter.

Jesus fucking Christ.

Well, hurry up and finish it, because like.

I try to help, We try to help, and he just attacks us. Is he grabbing another one? I know he's not grabbing another one.

Grabbing another one? Oh my god, that's my last one.

So I actually want to try that seven.

Dude.

I'm literally been over analyzing you too much recently. Why I've been watching every body movement of yours for the past like three weeks, and it's so you need to crack up.

Actually, this is actually really good.

Really yummy.

It's like sweet this Now this seems like this weird fucking ad.

For we'll blur it. I never said, yeah, that's a heina.

Can Yeah damn, I haven't had like a straight up beerd so long.

Okay, when I'm lying, you're literally fucked up.

You had three already. Wait, what's that screaming?

That's just like them keeping her in the room.

And hiding him in the base. Move everybody else.

Drunk episode?

Oh yeah, we do want to do a drunk episode really really badly.

Oh like that, just take the beach to me, like I should be at the beach. That one that's like not the normal one though.

What is like I think it's the light one.

Oh, it literally is.

Right right, Okay, well your mom stinks.

Oh.

We were at a meeting with our merch company and we were like just talking about like random ship and six nine came up and we were talking about how six nine used to wear those like big ass, stupid fucking outfits with the big words on it, and Drew was standing it was like you look it up, like I need to show them what I'm talking about, Like, you know when six and I would have like pussy and like HIV like on his clothes.

This big six', Nine, WELL i literally just googled in front of all of. THEM i just googled sixty nine pussy and THEN i went to the photos because, like oh, yeah that's gonna come. Up, no, literally, hardcore, nasty, fucking gross ass sixty nine porn came up all over my phone and it was so, humiliating but they all like laughed about.

It it's literally the funniest Thing i've ever, Seen, like why was that the funniest ten minutes of my life was looking at those pictures of.

Him because it's fucking. Psycho it's literally the craziest Shit i've ever. Seen and they also just have LIKE i don't, know it's just it's really. Funny and then also sixty nine getting his ass beat and jumped in an other's.

No AND i feel LIKE i knew intuitively that he's gotten his ass kicked.

Before, recently he got jumped in AN la fitness like coming out of the sauna.

In, miami and he was in his boxer briefs and it's really.

Embarrassing yeahn and he kids jumped and beat the fuck. Up and then some little, kid it sounds like a younger kid is, Like i'm a really big, fan, bro and is literally filming.

Him walking away from getting.

GET i think he filmed it.

Too, yeah he.

Filmed like him getting jumped and it was.

Awesome she like went, away like it's isn't he not even in jail?

Anymore did he got out because he had asthma because OF Covid WHEN covid, hit he got let out early and got put on probation or house arrest because of. Asthmask so he literally just had the luckiest setup. Ever but, like what is your luck if you're literally like On everybody's uh death like.

List, yeah it's the opposite of dick. Riding it's like dick riding in the opposite direction where you, jumped you. Don't, yeah it's like someone you don't know you jump for being a. Snitch like that is crazy person.

Behavior, yeah, no it is, insane but it makes for awesome content and we should keep it.

Going that guy is so different from, Me, like could not be more different six.', NINE yeah i like see that Guy and, i'm like we have such, different lives it could not be.

More different i'm so Embarrassed because i'm wearing an orange jacket next to this fucking stupid orange thing, behind me AND now i just Feel like i'm one big.

Message and this.

Orange, Thing yeah.

I'm just blending in and It's like i'm a Ghost and i'm.

Fading, Away well.

I'm Wearing my muchacha shirt that is getting too small for Me because i'm filling out into my man Figure and i'm getting stronger, and BIGGER and i just. LOOK good i haven't worked out in like a month and a half.

ME either i just have a gym MEMBERSHIP so i could look.

At, IT yeah i just went to the gym today for the first time in. Three, weeks though you woke up.

HELL early.

I know i've been waking up at. Seven am that's.

So lit why do you think it was from Being In new york for?

So, long, yeah WELL when i, GOT back i, Was like i'm just gonna, weaponize This and i've just been like waking up at seven that's actually.

So SAD well i couldn't. Do that but my earliest is like nine am is like my wake. Up Earliest but i've been going to sleep hella EARLY that i. Will say last night was.

THE latest i went to Sleep in it was like, one Am but i've been sleeping at. Like, twelve also being the nail biter in, a relationship it was the most traumatizing thing that ever happened, To me like like being the one who bites, My nails like there's nothing more awful than being the nail bier and having to be with somebody.

Who's like stop stop like that like that is. My trauma that's.

My story and any other, nail biters if you're in a relationship and you're the, nail bier you know EXACTLY what. I, mean, like Well now i'm gonna bite my nail.

Even, more well now this shit, tastes Good so i'm gonna.

FUCKING eatther, i mean fingernails do taste good, as FUCK and i don't give. A fuck so does. The skin it's like.

SO yummy i think this skin tastes, really good but not.

The nails like.

After you bite the nail and then you like. Smell, it oh that. SHIT hits i.

Think you just like the smell of your own breath Because that i've never UNDERSTODD because i don't think my nails would smell the same coming out.

Of, my mouth like burnt rubber and. Like tires there's someone out there that knows Exactly what i'm. Talking about i'm being, very vulnerable so.

Much friction to your nail that you're literally causing like a little bit of a. Burn.

Smell, YEAH sorry i was looking for this photo, to SHOW but i literally can't, find it so we'll just. Move on.

No one was.

Are? You?

Okay? Hey hey where'd you? Gom?

Here yeah we shouldn't be. Doing this we really shouldn't Be, doing.

No, we shouldn't but we should because it feels.

So natural we shouldn't BE do i like that.

You're natural and you're not like those other girls and all filled up, with, Nasty.

Nasty shut the. FUCK up i like that you're like not like the, other girls and you don't like put cake icing on, your face, and.

LIKE yeah i like that you're not like the. Other girls and you're not like in like a tight like little dress and just like showing off, Like whatever like you're not like.

A skin i like that you're not like the, other girls and like you don't wear tampons or periods and like have. That ship, OH no i.

Have That so, i'm, LIKE no i, get that Then what what's what's wrong?

With that that is like FULLY like i need to. Get THAT if, i didn't then that would be like a sign.

Of trouble you don't have to. Get that you're being gasolt into thinking that you have to.

Get, that, YEAH no i think y'all are like trying to gas like me into. THINKING that.

I okay the fact that you even get that and around me. Is, crazy yeah.

It's weird it's really.

You find that most times when you're with, a woman you are such a stress in. Her life you off put.

Her, period yeah that's like what.

Men do i've never don anyone who gets.

A period it's like the, same Ideas Like ben shapira, saying like my wife never, gets wet like when we, Have sex like that's not, a thing such. A, legendary yeah like it's so. Dead, ass yes he was being dead serious and he, was like my wife doesn't get wet when we. Have sex there's she has like something wrong with, her basically and like everyone, was, like no like she's just not physically attracted, to You and i'm sorry THAT'S what i do, and.

Saying, oh okay. THAT'S good i mean at least he's not alone because.

With periods, oh yeah you just caused them so much stress and anguish that you like literally stop.

Their siting. M m that's KIND of, i mean.

Honestly psychonic they should.

Be, THINKING yeah i, need that like kind of you.

Want me to really go HARD because i can. Go HARD oh i can make your life a. Living hell oh, My, god no like you're literally.

Scaring, me, Okay.

Right, Hell dude i've Been watching drew so closely and he, literally like you MOVE like i, don't know sometimes you move around. Fast, animatronic yeah like an animatronic or like, you know when you're playing sims and unless you hit, a button they don't do anything in their standing, Really still like sometimes when you, move around you look like you just got the action sent to, your brain like so you have to immediately.

Do it do you Know what?

I'm saying like you never slowly get into gear to move you just.

Like like you move like too fast after being stagnant.

For, too long and that's why you're always. Almost, fainting yeah.

THAT'S it i was just about to bring. That up my mom is Always like I'm when I'm, IN texas, i LIKE guess i stand up, too fast and, She's, like drew you have to stand, up slower like you're going to pass out. In Faint and, i'm, LIKE yeah, I know i've like literally it's happened like several times just. Being here, she's like just stand, up SLOWER and i like physically can't make myself.

Do, it no it's literally because there's a little like robot in your like chest probably that's like moving things around and like.

Get up. Yeah, EXACTLY also i have like weird breathing like habits WHERE when i, Stand up, i'll.

Like yeah when your throat is abused for too much of your life that.

Usually, happened, Yeah, yeah NO when i, STAND up i like hold my BREATH like i LIKE and i also just hold my breath for like just random amounts of TIMES where i was just, LIKE hold i, don't know it's. Really, WEIRD no i actually did three and a half minutes at. The, CHATEAU really i Swear, TO god i can do it. Right, now. YEAH exactly i held it in.

REALLY deep i probably did TOO when i was too HIGH and i.

Couldn't breathe so you're not the only.

One out, May help, May OUT may?

I again On My getting Scared and, HIGH journey i got so high we Binge watched RuPaul's, jag RACE and i FELT like i was living in a.

Different, planet yeah.

That show watching it high is literally the craziest thing you can do to. Your brain it is so like it just is. Sensory overload it feels like it's from, an alien, extraterrestrial planet like everything.

Is, on purpose like makes things.

So, weird yeah and like when you're high, watching it like you kind of, realize that like this show kind, Of SUCKS like i can't, explain it like the editing of the show or something about it kind, of sucks and it's literally JUST like i haven't this isn't, my joke but like it's Literally just coco melon. For adults like, the colors like the, flashing lights the, sound effects like the little, ad libs like all of it is just like engineered to like seep into your brain and like not.

It's so awesome because it is the best and worst.

Thing, ever yeah it's the best thing ever because all the queens, on it especially this this was such a.

Good season, was wild.

But it's the worst show ever because, it's like what? Is happening just what? Is happening the way it's edited is.

So crazy it genuinely FELT like i was being put in. A room was it called when they like show shows two audiences to get a reaction to see.

If they need to.

Change, anything okay not a, CASE study i know what.

You're, talking yeah so it felt.

Like THAT but i was visiting this planet and they were trying to show me like, what's like what's happening on?

This WORLD and i just, was like whoa also?

Is HAPPENING all i know is y'all gotta stop being mean to. The villain queens when they actually are brave enough to be the villains, like publicly like in your, friend group like talk, your shit but like we need villain queens to make this. Shit interesting and that's why this season was so fun was because there were a bunch of, mean bitches but you can't be mean to them publicly or everyone's gonna be afraid to be. The villain like we need villains MAKE.

Good tv and that's why everybody like decides to be a villain.

Is because it makes good to.

You, exactly ALSO all i can think about is there's this one like part in the Season Where rue paul goes like it was when one of the queens was crying over their Life and rude.

Just goes and you, deserve it like about like them having a, good life but It's like rude just looks like.

A robot rue this special emotions or movements like you.

Deserve it at, This point RuPaul genuinely might be artificial INTELLIGENCE like, ai generated because like he is also like actually eight hundred and seventy six, years old and not enough people talk about that is the Fact that RuPaul is eight hundred and seventy six years old and just, a VAMPIRE but i think he actually might.

Have, passed yeah and they made, a ROAD but i genuinely, think that like at the end, of episode somebody unlocks a big we being at the back at the back Of ru paul's back and like hits buttons and turns.

Them off remember when we convinced our friend that they were a robot and that they glitched in. The ocean we had a buddy and where were we Were? In, miami yeah we all went to the beach, And like i'm not gonna mention this person, by name but they were like swimming in the water and we all like concocted.

A plan everyone, Was high so this is why this.

Was, done yeah we all concocted a plan to, be, like yo we should like tell them that they like started glitching and saying like the craziest like shit ever and like the they like came back and, we're, like dude like you literally started glitching in the water and we saw like electricity and you were saying crazy ship, like,

The person of the Story.

Is drew, THAT yeah i was, the robot the. Gay robot but.

We trig drew into thinking it wasn't him who we did, it to but It. Was.

Drew. Yeah okay also ONE thing i want. TO address i told a story in the very beginning of the last EPISODE where, I said i'm the only real. BISEXUAL person i don't fuck with any of that bullshit that's on the. OTHER side i don't bat. THAT way i am straight through and through. Like that why would you?

Say that and you said it like. REALLY proudly, i mean it's still the wrong thing.

To say straight as, an arrow an arrow to. The knee if you're, you're straight you, get that like that's a straight to. The knee it's for, The boys like the weekends are for, The boys saturdays for, The bullets saturdays for. The boys.

Did at, mason's party and you guys are all across. THE street i was watching her so intently and the way he was like. Moving around our friends are like there was like an animal that was injured and walking on the sidewalk and they saw like the. Bloody footprints so everybody was investigating it and trying to, figure, out, like okay what could have, happened here like did someone?

DO this i was taking it. Dead, serious yeah.

He was like they were all so.

Into it we were sitting on this hill watching everybody like go around and like look, at it and.

Everyone's taking it.

So Serious but drew literally started like hopping around and like reenacting because it was.

One footprint it was the Front left paul and it was, like bloody and it was bloody like for literally like six hundred feet and it was one print and the blood spatter was the exact same on each, pap print and we were trying to figure out like how the fuck did, this happen and like was it hit by? A car was it like someone abusing? Their animal was it like an animal attacking? Another animal it, was crazy but it was, one FOOTPRINT so i had to hop to see maybe it was hopping on, one foot but it.

Was not and then he, started grittying and it was like the most Insane thing i've.

Ever, Seen yeah i've been getting good. At GRITTY should i? Show?

THEM yeah, I guess like an update.

Is okay wait one, s.

Ow you're like. Getting ready it's like when someone starts. A, race, okay.

Whoa it's literally just, a.

Walk dude it, got, worse honestly. MM hmm i don't know, What, happened drew but that is significantly worse.

Than update it's like worse than it, was before just observing TRUE because i don't believe he's.

Real anymore you got away with it for a. Long TIME but i don't think.

You're right i've been. Tricking. YOU no i think you're just really like seeing through the cracks and seeing me FOR who i. Really am and you're kind of like more self aware than, you were and, you're, like, oh whoa like something actually might be wrong.

WITH him, I mean I think i've always.

Don't, test, oh okay so.

Let's try some. OF them.

I would i was gonna like write, it DOWN but i was. Too LAZY but i remember some of the things that you have to. Be Done so i'm going to say words. To you i'm going to say like.

Some numbers, to you and you have to repeat them back.

To me, that's, easy right four five eight nine four or five eight nine seven two five nine seven two five nine eight three one two eight three.

One, Two okay so you can. Do, that, no.

Yeah Easy now i'm gonna do the, same thing but you have to say the. Numbers, Backward okay so eight four nine to two.

TWO. For i. That's crazy actually wait for eight.

NINE two i don't remember.

What okay so.

Five nine, four eight.

Eight four Five.

Nine.

NO because i said five to nine for eight.

Eight four Five. Nine no, Fuck yeah.

See you can't.

DO it i will say THAT when i couldn't do either literally YouTube video and could like pause it and, do WHATEVER but i literally couldn't even Remember the is there like? A, TIME also i think he said, six NUMBERS so i think it was like supposed to be.

LIKE here i. CAN eat i can't do the ones forward all day, fucking long but the.

Ones, backward, okay dude let's do the other the repetition again seven three nine five two seven.

Seven three nine five Two.

SEVEN okay i think you can do that.

One, easy okay do this one backwards two nine five seven four.

NINE that i. LITERALLY don't i can't nine four seven Two, five no it's.

Nine four seven five. Nine two.

That's actually like goes.

STRAIGHT over i wonder if the words the letters had to be, super specific you? Do.

It, BACKWARDS no i couldn't, add, okay LIKE but i even had.

A hard time to do one with kyro quick just to see repeat these numbers backwards, seven, three nine five, TWO.

Seven i can't.

Do, THAT yeah i think that's literally no one could. DO that i can't do.

That's insane and then there's gonna be a bunch of people who, WERE like i literally just, Did, that.

Okay do this on, two, nine, five seven, FOUR nine i.

Can't, do that.

Wonder nine four seven Nine two can you do it with like?

Two?

Numbers wait let.

Me see oh and then, he said if you have a hard time, with six seven and, eight multiplications, then yeah that's like.

A sign i.

Can't do a. NINE'S two i Suck at.

I'm only good at IT because i learned this in elementary sixty six thirty six, six seven forty two, six eight forty eight. SIX nine i don't even remember Sixty four kashmar seven seven forty nine seven eight, FIFTY six i don't know seven nine sixty three.

EIGHT eighth i also saw they're teaching children like new ways. TO multiply i don't know what, it is but it's IT'S like i think it's Like a sumerian like number system or some shit. Like that that's definitely not what. It is but it's, like ancient ancient number system based on like really really old times instead of it being like random like characters like a four and a one like have nothing to do with. Each other like one will be like, a line two will be, two lines

The, graphic Yeah but i've always been bad, At math like math was never my, strong suit, So BAD like i can't do. Long division when we were sitting Around with Josh and josh got bored and started putting division questions in, OUR face i literally couldn't, believe it or like multiplication in. OUR face i can't do that.

Because THE way i get away with, IT is i just.

Like start adding up each number like however many times it needs, To do And if, i'm lucky it's an even NUMBER and i could just like add the thing up twice and, then.

Do okay, that number post, that number post. That number does that? Make? Sense?

Like yeah also, It's giving like WHY do i need to know how to? DO math i literally.

Have iPhones nobody needs to know how, to spell read or write because you have voice to fucking like chat like you have.

Like, hello yeah all you need is intuition and like creativity and that's.

Fucking, tea also it's crazy that we were the last generation that got taught how to write cursive because nobody gets taught cursive.

Any really, Yeah NO like i think.

My signatures are going to be, ages regular.

Just, Like WRITTEN like i think people know to make up fancy.

Little signatures but kids don't get taught cursive. At all like my siblings cannot. Read cursive like they literally look at cursive and they're like what the fuck is crazy because they just weren't. TAT cursive i mean.

It's bullshit who? Fucking cares because it's pretty? And?

Fun uh do you guys have. Good signatures does it?

Look good mine? Looks okay mine is. Really boring it's just my name, IN cursive i should. SAY that I.

Remember I saw jo sighs and it was.

REALLY good i wonder how do you draw on? The iPhone i'll show you mine real, Quick.

Me like what is someone gonna do plagiarize a check with my name? On, IT like i? Don't know why is that?

Actually?

Yours see yeah That's? What drew does you do that?

On?

Chats?

Okay god like what? The? Fuck like? Who cares it's ON my? Id, too lin that.

LOOKS good i think that's that's definitely better.

Than mine that's literally just, the signature fucking and you the singer. Has too so my signature isn't. Even fancy it's just.

My name it's like who's gonna?

Jack that? You, know yeah just simplify it like to, the maximum like who? Fucking, cares okay what's happened to some? Media? Meteor, well wait there.

Was one more thing in the. Dyslexic test oh. This one.

I'm, curious OKAY when i say, a word you Need to i'm gonna tell you what like letter to replace?

What with and tell me what the new word is so WASTE replaced W with p paced BRAIN replaced B. With. C, crane okay then. You're good maybe you're just.

Like, dumb, no no you're.

Not.

DUMB true I know i'm.

Like intelligent you just have DYSLEXIA because i met. SOMEBODY recently I think i said this on, the episode but like she was talking about how she like fully has diagnosedic dyslexia and she does everything, you do like Everything like, she's, like dude it's like simple WORDS that i just, can't do LIKE and i have to do word. To text everybody's Mad because i'm always like talking out loud at, my iPhone like for all of.

My texts she couldn't read. Out loud she, WAS like i have a really hard time reading. Out LOUD like i know how, to SPELL but i just like.

Cannot spell like she, WAS like i always have to ask people to like spell check for ME because i always AM like i don't know how to spell. That word and it could be a word that she's like says or writes, every day but she just her brain Is.

Like i'm gonna go. Get diagnosed how funny would?

That be you should? Do it and then make it your. Whole. Personality, yeah yeah.

Did you guys know that thirty percent Of The united states is undiagnosed? With ligma like, my balls.

You fucking, stupid bitch you're gonna fucking? Get us oh, my, God, no.

Jory that's like, my balls you. Stupid bitch you thought you were gonna FUCKING.

Get i just, said it.

THAT'S right i don't.

Get it forty ches.

Like lick my balls?

Like, LIGMA yeah i, bodied, you.

Oh like in.

A, like hah lick, my.

Balls dummy do you KNOW d i was, gonna say My Friend, sagandhi's jones.

Who? Is That Who's sagan?

Sagandhi's? Nuts? Fuck, oh actually this is. On ironic we're Going to. Sokan tomorrow do you want?

To go?

Fuck you so?

THESE nuts i have.

ANY that i literally believed IT because i was like sawcon like we do go to conventions ENOUGH that i.

Was like well there's a convention. About, saw yeah, all, right whatever that.

Was bad do you know WHAT if i WHAT if i put my balls all the way in?

YOUR ass i would be excited, And, HAPPY like i don't get. The joke it's not even. That funny because THAT'S what i like beg.

FOR christ i didn't see it going in. That, DIRECTION honestly.

I been asking him for. Months years it's true's that just stop please. Some media we went And Saw, bows, afraid uh and we have.

Good news yeah we.

Liked, IT yeah i, Think THAT like I think i'm kind of with everybody. Else where, i'm, like oh the first like hour and, a half two hours or like really really, fucking good like borderline, masterpiece material and then like it just kind of crossed my suspension. Of disbelief but like THE more i thought, about it like after, the movie THE more i, was like that's exactly like

LIKED it i really. LIKED it.

I just think that there was like there, was, like, actually uh if thirty minutes of the movie, was cut it would be like the best movie.

In the world. To me but even if like fifteen of it, was cut it would still be.

The best because they kind of this is spoiler spoiler if you haven't, Seen it but the, boat scene like once it got to the, boat scene like him getting in, the BOAT like I feel i felt like he was in the boat for so long for, some, reason like but that's just because at THAT point i, was, like damn like what is like how can something?

Else happen.

Once, THAT started i, Was, Like okay i'm like, Tapped out but then they brought me back in because there was like funny parts.

After that, so yeah that's. MY take i actually really liked, it THOUGH because i was.

GOING in i literally when you Me and josh, were talking when you, were like uh when you sent us that you got, THE tickets i was. LIKE fuck i almost like was hoping that everybody would BAIL so i didn't have to see it because people were making it seem like it was like the fucking worst movie on, the planet but it. Really wasn't it was like Good because i've seen some bad movies that, everybody Liked and, I'M like.

I left i left at? Two hours did.

You At the you don't even Know what i'm talking about with the both things.

At the very end of the movie that literally he like predicted. That happening like the, last scene like everybody was, walking out like there was like a big spoiler alert like go, watch it don't listen. To this but there was like a big stadium where he was being like prosecuted and the jury was like it. Was huge it

The whole audience just started being like, all right, like yeah walking in.

WHICH is i was like damn he literally he fully was like people are going to walk out.

Of this, but, YEAH personally i just don't walk out of Things because i'm the kind of girl THAT like i stick it to.

The end but it.

Was awesome also them playing did you even get to where They Played, MARIAH carey i don't.

Think So do you has some really actually.

Good parts, it's OKAY can i tell You or i'll tell you AFTER because i don't want to like keep literally like.

Saying spoilers but it was actually so, fucking funny but you just.

Missed it also On my, letterbox review apparently someone was being very very hateful and like, extremely rude so much to the Point where letterbox removed their comment and threatened to ban. Their account and everybody replied to this guy, and said what's going on with?

This?

Guy, Danny danny you're in securities. ARE showing i Already know danny smells like shit and breathe out of. His mouth danny eats shit. And paint you're so mad. And gay, great, Job guys danny. Is GONE so, I, think oh he said really hateful shit to my letterbox review and he doesn't even follow me. To, yours yeah, oh shit his review is so.

My grandpa you have a quart of paint today thinking it Was Yogurt.

Danny laffoon everybody Go To danny laffoon and block his ass and ban his fucking account because he is being. A man i'm not gonna, say that but he deserves to die in, the FIRE and i hope. HE burns i don't even know what he said. TO me i want To ask Letterbox because i'm Cool, with letterbox like, weird chill like we have a. Good relationship i'm gonna ask him to give me like the COMMENTS so i can take him to the court.

Of law to the court, OF law i.

Will SAY that i think the first hour and a half. WAS good i.

LIKED it i do agree with, everybody That like josh, was saying like the first thirty minutes was like so, fucking good and that, was, LIKE yeah i, Was amazing but the whole movie, IN general i actually do really LIKE and i just. LIKE that i this is also just me projecting my idea. Onto IT like i do feel like it was just like commentary on like big pharma and like how we treat people with anxiety and like all, these things and like what it means to, have anxiety and like.

How like deep it could go, whatever whatever.

Like, OBVIOUS everybody i think walked away, thinking that but it was really good and like some of the things you missed, Are cool like they just did such a good job of like although it was like the longest fucking, movie ever so much shit. WAS happening i think they did a good job of like kind of tying it back to. THE beginning i Just watched josh like tip, toe by so you didn't make notes, but yeah do you want to get into some of your?

Music, MEDIA yeah i really want to know what this fucking freak bitch said for everyone to ride, like that he must have said some really. Hateful shit he probably.

Was just mad that you made. A joke.

I'll be just MAD that i liked. THE movie.

I mean i would be, mad too.

But that's like everyone people get mad at. That, SHIP like i don't reuly don't understand why people, get upset.

Like whether you like it, Or not like literally why like actually why does? It matter like just like oh No surprises radiohead mmm mmmm, Oh Yeah Poker Faced, Lady, gaga yeah oh wait this.

Oh?

So Real jeff buckley And.

THEN amiga i don't know If that's portuguese or Is?

That portuguese it's it might be because It's. Giving, BRAZIL yeah i.

Was, gonna say is that one Of, THE yeah i Think it's portuguese because. Hm, Hmm.

Okay lorial my friend just reposted this Song By, elton john the title of WHICH Is I think i'm going to. Kill myself that.

Is fucking because that is literally.

My vibe that's, So hard okay if.

It Isn't Love New edition Vacuum By ganggang dance or Is It? Gongong Dance Secret tear Drops By. MARTIN rev i can't say the name of, this ONE so I used You're Not Gonna get it.

And.

Uh poor Side of Town The, fifth DIMENSION which I think i said.

Last week but that song was.

So good oh we Did a Baby By general lee In The Space.

Army band we, Did, It joe we, Did.

It joe that's it for.

This episode thank you so much for watching and listening and loving and learning with. Us today what did we?

Learn today we learned that juris dyslexic, and straight which is.

A feat i'm different than a lot of.

These, girls yeah THAT'S what i.

THINK is i do a lot, of things a lot of things better than. Dr, BEER actually i literally normally off like a sip of, A beer i can like, feel IT and i didn't feel that, at all which.

IS interesting i want to drink chlorine water, so, bad, really yeah but like because of the smell.

Of it like while you were talking, ABOUT that i, was, Like DAMN like i don't want to drink water park water because that's like the most filthy water on. The planet but, you know the smell of it so much chlorine into it and ship going.

Indoor pool yeah. Like that.

They need to make that into. A, CANDLE yeah i need to go into an indoor pool.

RIGHT now i want to drink gasoline that smells good.

To me gasoline does smell, really good.

Literally does AND then i also want to drink a big bucket. Of, piss, okay yeah.

We're done, All right thank you guys so much.

For.

Watering yeah

Sh