Outing Drew

Welcome back to Eppen too of emergency Intercom. Yes, sir, please, yes it.

Yeah, that looks nice. It's eighty degrees inside. We're really sweaty today.

Yeah, we've realized.

The hell we trapped ourselves in.

By starting this in the summer in our fucking.

Dungeon, in our kitchen dungeon. The hottest room in the house, absolutely.

Literally the hottest rooms in the house in the summer are you and Josh.

Yeah, it's terrible because I have all those windows. It's so bad, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. And I actually like living in heat. I am like a warm body person by nature. I would rather be hot than cold.

I agree with that because when I was at the beach yesterday, I went to the beach alone for the first time yesterday because I decided I would like to start doing things alone because I'm very dependent in being around others because I get a lot, like really scared of being alone. Anyways, when I was at the beach, I was cold, and I was like, dude, Miami, I like cannot wait to be back in Miami heat on the beach because like the point of being at the beach is to be literally drowning in heat.

You want to be like sweating.

You want to be sweating so you can get in the water and cool down and then do that a million times.

Does anybody else think that just like Miami Heat hits different.

I hate you so far.

I think it just hits it different.

The basketball team literally me in middle school acting like I give a fuck about basketball because the boy I liked was really into basketball and the Miami Heat was in the finals, and I was like, oh my.

God, yes, name five players on Miami Heat the starting class.

I can name five players that used to be on there. I could name the three lebron Chris Bosh, and Dwayne Wade. That was like the they were like the.

Superpower Yeah, yeah, they were. Literally the NBA has superpower teams. We don't have to talk about it because I will go in it's especially those sports. No sports.

But what we should talk about is my fucked up sleeping schedule. Yes, and we kind of lightly touched on this in the last episode about how like me and Drew switch off with our mental health. So this past week I've been spiraling.

Literally spiraling. It's like it's traumatizing to twenty eighteen almost where I'm like, this bitch is teetering on like a full blown depressive episode and we need to save her.

I know, Summer, dude, that is the scariest Oh, Gona, we really.

Need to save somewhere. We need to get you help.

So for context to that, in twenty eighteen, I was in genuine one of the worst depressive episode of my life. It dragged on it twenty nineteen. It was terrifying to be around. It was terrifying to witness. It hurt all of my friendships and relationships. It literally was destroying me and everything around me. But yeah, one of the key signs of it starting was like my sleeping schedule just got obliterated because I had no motivation to like get

Of dawn literally seven am. Yeah, like, no, you were going to sleep at like three am, but sleeping until six pm. You were just sleeping, I know.

But in twenty eighteen, it got to the point that I would stay up till like six and then I would sleep all day. But it's slowly been getting there because like I slept at three am and then woke up at three pm. That's twelve hours of sleep.

And I and I'm like in the background doing my little task, like just trying to wake up in the in the morning, and she like she just doesn't And I tried to like give her my advice. What I did to get my sleeping schedule back on check was putting my phone on the other side of the room with an alarm set and it just forces you out of bed, Like.

It did do that today. It just forces you to get twenty extra minutes. But it did help me get up. Yeah, but yeah, my sleeping schedule just goes to shit. And then like because I wake up so late, I'm like, I don't know what to have for breakfast. I don't even want a coffee. It's so late in the day. I don't want a coffee. And then like I even lose my appetite for coffee, and that is a key sign that something is scary. I don't want a coffee.

That's scary, like and is literally the girl like, don't talk to me before my cafe literally if she doesn't have her coffee, like don't talk to me.

At all all day. So yeah, so we've just been like talking about that recently and literally how your sleep schedule fully does coincide with your mental health.

As as well as like I hate to say it, but like fitness, yeah, and gut health like that shit, Like it.

Sounds so annoying, but I genuinely this is like.

The propaganda of fitness and gut health.

Yeah, the propaganda is kind of true.

It's a propaganda.

It's really because like I was saying, like I kept I keep thinking about last year. I'm like, dude, I was in such a good spot mentally, but like my sleeping schedule was awesome. I was sleeping at latest like two am, but then waking up at like nine thirty ten am every day, which I know some people are like that's late, but nine ten thirty am is my favorite waking up time because.

If I have too much time, I was about to say.

It will treat me the opposite, and I will also.

See yeah, like waking us waking up at like nine ten is like the six am seven am for the regular girlies, because like when you have nothing to do, all day, especially in a pandemic like filling the time, it's impossible. Literally you just go insane. And that's why screen time back to that is so high because there's just nothing to do.

But yeah, and like I want to like start riding my bike again because it felt so free. I just felt like a free girl listening to cop By Florence in the machine riding my bike, just like living my life.

Yeah, I want to start working out. I want to get get active again. I want to do hot pilates again, because that ship was on that so udimately life changing. Like I know it sounds crazy, but like that is the hardest I've ever worked out in my entire life. Like that is that is so crazy.

It literally is insane. People like even me, when I used to think of pilates and yoga, I was like, dude, that shits such like w that's shit is so whack, like it's but then when you're in that class, especially in a hot class, it is insane how intense those workouts. Yeah, lotis is like a very intense form of workout. Yeah.

And then also on top of that, the humidity in those rooms is like fucking seventy percent and then you're also breathing in everybody else's sweat humidity, which is disgusting. Like, it's absolutely discussed, that's the.

First thing to go for COVID.

Yeah, they're like, fuck that hot. Yeah, literally, but I was just thinking we should just do hot plates in our kitchen in the daytime because it's literal eighty three degrees in a year.

That was one of the best parts about working out last year is like the house would be so fucking hot and I would literally just come in and like from the ad general adrenaline of riding my bike, I would come inside and like work out and then I would feel fucking awesome and take like a cool shower and it was like, which also, like this is probably a hot take, but it's just my personal experience with

I was about to say, for me, it's like it's not about looking a certain way because I like the way I look. It's purely about like releasing those feel good chemicals in my brain and making me feel good. And also like the neurotic part of me is like if I miss a day, it'll fuck me up, and then it just keeps me on schedule and then I'm just like slowly getting home. That's right.

So hard to get back into it because like you know, once you do, it's like a commitment you have to like.

Stay predictive personality, I know, fully diving.

Oh but what I was saying is it helps my

I was like, girl strung, I'm working out.

I could carry it a five pound weig.

Girl, she can lift up a one gallon jug of milk on her own. Like with one arm, you can carry a gallon of boke up the stairs. That is one of the most embarrassing things to me is like actually, like if you set a milk jug in front of me and was like, take your left arm and lift it up, It's actually a struggle for me. That's how we got Like it's literally like I can't do it.

That is not something you tell the public.

But also that just colignes like I need. I also do partly like want to get like super fucking ripped, because like how funny would that be is if one day I just like take off my shirt on Instagram and I am literally like built like a goss. I have like the perfect genetics for it, like I have, I have the broad show.

I know what you're talking about, because I also, like I will say again, I don't. I just want to like clarify me and Dre are not like workout junkies because we're like we want to be sexy. I don't give a fuck. I feel sexy in the most odd moments, like I don't give a fuck, like working out will make me feel good. I don't think anyone needs to work out to be sexy, but I will say what I was working out. I am one of those dumb bitches that if I worked out for two weeks, I

Have Yeah, you would like kind of show them off a little bit sometimes.

But like because I was because I was so old, because you were in Texas and Josh was in OC so I was just so alone and I was like, literally no one seeing me get ripped this shit like, which, again I don't care, but it was just such a funny point in my life because I've never worked out before. Then. Yeah, but also, what you eat does affect you, and I fully believe that.

Literally, I like people told me that my entire life. They were always like, what you put in your body really does matter, like it matters, And I was like, I don't fucking care, Like I'm gonna eat this chicken nugget, like I don't give a shit. But now that I'm like older, I'm like and I've I've given it a second thought, I'm like, wait, like that's what our body runs on. Like what we put into it is what our body runs on. I mean it hasn't changed. Shit, I still eat a bag of fucking talkies a day

I call them a garbage just folls it the other day.

It's the really shit suck it is. So it's the really shit Like if people leave their leftovers around me or like whatever it is, I'll just pick it up and eat it. I don't give a shit. But it is kind of good for me because if I didn't do that, I would literally only eat once a day. Like, I don't know what it is about me, No.

It's literally me and Drew have the worst habit where like we rarely have something we want to eat. Like I'm not somebody who like.

So hard to decide.

Yeah, dude, I get such decision anxiety about food. If I'm like ordering off an app or something, then I will literally stare at my options like for an hour, and then the hour.

Goes by and then it's too late.

Yeah, and now it's nine o'clock and all, like the better options for food or clothes. And then I'm like, fuck, do I have to eat taco bell at like ten pm right now?

And we do, and we I.

Fucking feel like shit. Sometimes taco bet as good as fuck, But I thrive off of groceries. Yeah.

I was about to say, like, you're You've been really good this past like year two years of just like cooking, like you cook all the time and.

Don't make it. I don't be on my like bone app of Tita shit where I'm cooking a bunch of different shit, Like I.

Guess soup and eggs.

I eat bean soup or like vegan tortilla soup without the tortilla.

It's good as fuck, don't get me wrong.

Or I eat salmon and a sturfry or eggs and granola like those are like the things or tuna sandwich. Those are like the six things I put in rotation and like are super easy to make for me, and I know how to make them down to the tea and it's like clockwork, and I can eat the same thing every single day. But I do have to be careful because I am this close to mercury.

I was about to say, I was literally That's why I was laughing because I was like, this bitch literally only eats fish and it's like actually concerning. But who was that actor? I don't remember who it was, but literally like died of mercury poisoning from eating too much fish. Yes, and literally so fucking embarrassing about that, And it wouldn't even be funny. It would just be like it just be like like damnn, like it's like for real, like that that's how you're gonna die.

Like I like, if I am not eating in, I will eat sushi, and if I'm eating in, I will have fish, and that is like really bad, and I know I shouldn't do it. I did get stuff to make other things, like again, last summer, I was making these really weird like tofu tacos and like, don't get it twisted. They were not fucking juicy and delicious. It was.

And you would also add your yeast seasoning.

I'm literally a nutritional yeast to every.

I hate that, like it just looks and sounds discussing. I know it's really good for you, and it actually tastes really fucking good, but like, don't call it that, like call it literally anything else. Like I don't want to eat yeast infection. I mean sometimes sometimes you have to eat east infection.

Yeah. Oh I can't even say the name. But I know someone who said that one time they ingested.

No, that literally actually made me nauseous. And I'm like, no one talks.

About imaginal health enough publicly, like no one.

Talks about We did have that conversation recently, like yeah.

Where there was a TikTok where someone like was showing the difference between normal discharge and then like, uh, a yeast infection. But I also do think, like where did.

She get the yeast from? That's what I want to know. Where did she get that infection from? It looked too real.

Oh though the discharge looked.

Yeah, yeah, the yeast infection discharge. Same thing to me.

To me, the thing, it's like no one talks about it. But also I do think like vaginal health is so intuitive because like you see them underwear every single day.

So you know, damn well, if like, what's that skin mark.

Tuppy Custard is looking a little.

Not call it that ever, ever, ever, again, the thought, oh that's what Tubby Custard is. It's this shirt.

So yeah, if that Tubby Custer comes out looking a little more opique than usual, oh it's stinky, like you just have no smell and that's what makes them like kind of scary. Is like the Tubby Custard looks a little different, but it's not smelling quite.

Like I'm literally I'm literally like, I mean peanis men don't talk about penis health.

Enough, so gross going back.

Literally like there's no he's just wash it, just just clean it with your take.

I saw a TikTok that it was like it was like you know the audio that it's like fuck, it was like what song is it? It's like I remember when I lost my mind? I remember when or no, it's not that much. There's a song that it's like there was a song that's going viral TikTok about it was like I've become a fool or something. But it was like when I when I caught myself for like the seventh time arguing with him to take a shower.

For like that to get the first time was a red flag?

Did men's health is awesome? Black?

Their up? Black thereup? Yeah, I mean there was this. There's discourse online recently. I mean it's always been online about like washing your legs, like in the shower, do you like like go down and watch your legs.

Not every single time I shower, but like three times a week, I'll give like my legs a really good scrub and my toes a little Yeah.

Ever since, like literally ever since, like Twitter like made fun of men for not washing their ass and just washing their body in general, Like every time I shower. It's like trauma for me. Every time I shower, I get every inch of my body like really really gnarly because I'm like I don't want to stink, Like I don't want to be one of those dudes that just like have a smell.

In my head. Like Okay, And this is gonna be a hot take because the Internet cannot understand anyone's hygiene preferences, or it's not even hygiene preferences, Like there are studies about like, yeah, you shouldn't wash your body every single day, and also overexfoliating is bad for you, and washing your body is a form of exfoliating, especially if your ass is using a loofa because sometimes, especially if I'm like home all day, I'll be like, bitch, I'm not showering

Remember when like you used to be really crazy about showering and you would literally shower like three times a day. And when I told you that, I was like, cool down, maybe like the maybe that's what's like causing you to break out, like just like relax a little, like maybe go a day or two without showering.

Yee. But like that's also that stems from my minor like germophobia of like, okay, after I used about their math to wash my hand like three times because I wash it, and then I went to go touch the door handle, But the door handle is probably dirty because someone who's touched that, so then I have to go wash my hands again.

I do wipe my ass on the toilet, I mean on the door handle. I do. I do, Like I'm not joking, but.

I used to also not let anyone sit on my sheets, like I used to not let anyone sit on my bed, not even myself, especially in high school. Was such a big issue. In high school, I would like shower in the morning, shower at night. I wouldn't let anyone sit on my bed because I didn't want the outside stinky world to touch my sheets. I would come home from

I was about to say, I sit on my floor, but not because I'm scared of getting outside clothes on it.

No, I did it because I was so terrified of my bed getting dirty.

Literally, like coming home after a long day out or at school or whatever and just laying down on your floor, like on the carpet, just sprawled out, is like one of the most magical moments you can have in your life, point blank period.

I did like laying on the floor. Like we were talking about the other day, I liked laying under my bed.

Yeah, literally, I liked getting under it and being like compressed and just like literally I told you yesterday, I was like, I need someone likedlictonically, non sexually just to lay on top of me. I want to feel as a kid, were.

You that kind of kid who like would have your siblings like sit on your own.

Yes, I was always being walked on or I would literally like put my legs under my sister like on purpose, or like under my parents just so I could feel that. Like, yeah, the way impression.

It's like it sounds like we need a fucking anxiety weighted blanket I have on me.

Literally, I had the craziest like week of my life because I literally I haven't told anyone this because it's kind of embarrassing, but like I strictly sleep with my weighted blanket on top of my comforter. I don't get under my comforter. I have my weight to blanket on top of me, and legitimately, I like had to withdraw from my way to blanket. Like it was crazy, Like I wasn't able to sleep without it because.

I you need to start because this is about to get hot.

I know that's what I'm doing. Like that's when I'm trying to get rid of it, because like the hot as fuck under there, but also I like being hot and sweating.

Well, dude, that's that's the good thing about summer is like I can't stay in my bed all day, Like it like hurts my brain to be in my bed because I get so hot because the sun beaming in my windows. So I'm just like, ew, I am the kind of person I can't lounge in bed like all day. Like I've tried it, but it feels too gross to me.

Yeah, just like sitting there and like and.

Like getting clammy and like sweaty, like you know, I don't want to fucking do that. But that's our take on health. We're not doctors, though, so don't listen to absolutely anything. It's all from personal experiences too idiots.

But we can say get the vaccine. Go ahead and get the vaccine, us.

Being like hopefully when by the time this episode comes out, we'll have our vaccine. I know, every influencer in the world is like, yeah, I got my vaccine again. Not that me and Drew are anti vaxers. We're just lazy. We don't go anywhere.

The amount of times we've said that on the night, people are probably like, wait, are they anti vaxers?

I am an anti vaxer.

No, I'm not an anti vaxer. I just think everyone who needs the vaccine should get it before me. And that's it. Like, I don't want to take up vaccine space. I know that's like a stupid take and I'll probably get in trouble for saying that, but like, literally, just go and get it. I'll get mine. We stay inside all day anyways. But when I do have the chance to get the Johnson and Johnson blood clotter up, that's what we fucking that's I want that shit. I want the Johnson.

We did talk about this in the last episode because we were talking about how someone we knew and we gave them a really good reaction, and I was.

Like, oh see, I knew it. I knew we talked about it because I was like, I had it in my notes. But I'm getting the Johnson and Johnson vaccines. So now it's been.

Two episodes that we still don't have the vaccine.

I'm giving them a story, giving them and I.

Still I still do want to get it. But I don't know. I'm just like, again, not that I'm.

Like, not that you're wet, not that I'm.

Anti vaxer, I'm just scared, Like scared, Can you girl be scared? Why not a single influence, you know how, They're like, we need a pothead princess. We need an anti vaxer affluencer, literally so many anti vaxer We need a paranoid about dying from the vaccination influencer, an influencer who's gonna get the vaccine. Like I'm gonna get it by the time this episode comes out, I will have it. But can't we all just admit we're a little scared. No, I can't. No one admit that.

I think you're scared because you literally, like are actually terrified of getting sick. I think it stems from like being afraid of throwing up at the end of the day. No, yeah, I don't believe.

I don't want to get sick. I also like, if anybody is with me on this, I don't have health insurance. I've never had health insurance. I didn't come from a family who had the financial stability to be going to the doctor. Like even when we were sick, it was like, bitch, we're going to Walgreens. We're not going to the.

Doctor, Like we're going to eat dirt.

Yeah, We're gonna go eat dirt and build your immune system like that, Like we're not doing all that. So like I and I am not someone who like got I got the vaccines I needed because like obviously to be in school you needed to get like certain vaccines. But like I can't remember the last time I got like a shot of any kind, and I do in general, I just have like a weird fear of doctors and stuff, Like I talked about this in a video recently and

No, we are fully, we are fully. What's what I'm looking for?

Hypochondriac?

Hypochondriac? Hello, what's up, y'all?

It is Henyan Drew from the future, and we're just here to say we're vaccinated. Please do not take what we said as anti vaccine propaganda. We were just scared. We were scared little girls.

Yeah, but we're vaccinated. Now go get your vaccines. This is vaccine propaganda. This is pro vaccine propaganda, exactly. Go get them.

Go get that needle, girl.

I did get Johnson and Johnson I know.

We'll talk about that in the next yeah, or in the episode after the next episode, yeah bye, enjoy.

We are fully hypochondriacs. I think I am literally always dying of something like I just like I wish we were twenty years into the future where you could just lay under a machine once a year and it will just scan your body and tell you if you have cancer or not. And that's all I want. Like there is literally at your blood drawn and see if your fucking white sail count is high, but I don't. I want to get my blood drawn. Yeah.

Also, the last time I went to a hospital and got a needle put in me, it was winter like twenty nineteen. I went to Miami, and I get really bad like heart palpitations and like chess problems. I was told that I just have like the muscles in my chest are easily inflames. So then it literally feels like I'm having a heart attack sometimes and I actually need to get more medicine for it because it's coming backs.

It'll be like two seconds. Zamar was saying. It was literally the least pain Fullshotmar is.

Like such a man man though, like does that make sense?

Samar is like he probably has a very he gives.

Samar and Christian are the same kind of like boy man, does that make sense? Like they're not super masculine or anything, but there's like just like I'm just a man.

I'm just a dude.

I'm just a guy. Do you need help with that? That's that's what they are.

I could pick that up, dude, I can climb that wall and unlock that door.

Do you need me to pick that up or carry that?

Are you?

Are you all sure? Sure you don't need help? And then they make everyone leave and they do it themselves and they're.

Like it's okay, that's not me. I am like, figure it out, Like I mean, I'm pretty good about taking groceries up the stairs, though, like I go hard on groceries. It's like a little their mother goes hard. You do not go hard like me, Oh bitch.

Do you know how many times I brought up my groceries alone, like three bags each hand.

But I'm saying, I'm saying, when we go grocery shopping together, oh.

Yeah, because if I have someone else who's gonna pick up labor, I'm like, I'm not yes, but I.

Go hardest fuck on taking the groceries upstairs. But once a year, I was about to say once every three movens once every four month.

And it's not your groceries. It's because we were out and I was like, I'm stopping at the grocery store and You're like, MoMA.

No, Andya's literally that girl to me, Andy's literally your mom when she's like do you want to come?

Uh?

Do you want to go to the store with me? And then you're like, yeah, sure I'll go, but like please don't stop anywhere, and and you'll just like do you care if I stop at like Starbucks? And I'm like no, and then she's like wait, but I need to go get hair extensions, Like can I go get hair extensions?

And she's like, I'm like, I'm a hustle and bustle kind of bitch. I'm like, I'm out of the house. I can't go back home because if I go back home, that's the end of my day. Like, yeah, you don't start your car twice at your house. You start it once at your house a day. Interesting, And that's that's my motto.

My mama, please take me home, please car like a little dog. I know, I'm like on my fucking phone pouting.

And I'm vibing inside. I want hair extensions against so bad. I should do that. Actually, I'm gonna do that today before we go. I'm gonna break this on your fucking head. Why, oh my god, people, it's so funny that people with audio can't see us for things like that.

So the dude, people with only audio are like hit the lottery, like people having to watch this is the.

Thing is, I don't think people actually watch like visual Like it's not like we're putting things on screen and doing little fun things. It's literally us sitting in a fucking dingy corner, Like why are you watching this?

Whoa, I just did coke on camera, dude, I the audio listeners.

People are like, I knew it. I knew these fucking druggies. We we're not like substance abusers that We've said this so many times, but.

People literally have to clarify.

Yeah, I know, because people think because of the way we act, like, No, bitch, I don't act like this for any other reason other than the fact that I have a lots of internalized trauma and I need attention, Like that is why I act the way I act. Yep, yeah, like that is why we act this way. It's because we are the kids who were like we had to be funny for attention for survival. Our parents thought it was rude, so they weren't giving us the attention.

And also I was the last baby. I was the boy. Matten was the pampered little girl. I was twin I had to raise myself and that was my form of communication with my parents was being a fucking clown.

Literally saying except my dad was just always working. So I was like, cool, what fucking adult do I get attention from? Now, bitch, who the fuck is going to pay attention to me? And then me and my siblings would literally just fight each other to death. We were insane. Kid's our fucking end.

I don't know how we survive.

Nobody talks about when you grow up with a bunch of siblings with no parent supervision. Bitch on, fist fight on physically.

Yeah, you beat the shit out of each other. Like I feel like.

Kids growing up now they have TikTok and they like understand that, like violence is not the key and that they're like unlocking the third eye like this, No.

Violence is the key, and I think we need to bring back violence, and.

We need to bring back I am tired of people calling me annoying and talking shit about me on the internet. I am going to hit you, like I am done. The way I was raised is if you would like to talk shit, you do not talk shit unless you were going to back it up with getting hitting hit in the face, Yeah, getting puck in the mouth and if And I want so badly, like this has been my worst although the past year I've had so much

Yeah, And I think we what we could do to get that rage out because I feel like you just need like one like physical alteration with someone. I think like you need to get hit, you need to hit someone. We should box. You would beat the ship out of me, like period. But I think like I could get a couple of swings in I have like long arms, like I could get.

You Like, did you say I could get a couple of swings?

No, we should box. If y'all want to see his box, like, let us know, we'll do some pay per viewed John Paul or whatever, Jake Tawl, Jake Paul, Bryce Hall, Little Action, Bryce Hall. This is a call out post. I'm gonna beat your ass I'm gonna beat.

Your want to get in the ring with Brice Hall, that would be fun.

But yeah, all the Bryce Hall stories we should tell one day.

I know we'll give them, dude. We just have such an insane amount of stories and like I would I want to get.

Into all of them that so we just have to remember them.

Yeah, and we can also just start off a little soft, and then we could get into like the.

The juews.

It all. Like. Also, the stories we have are just fucking funny, because like we're just trolls by nature, and.

We just we go to these parties where everyone's like networking and trying to be cool and just look cool, and we make fun of everybody doing that, like why are you at a party and not being fucking fun?

Like, people are so fucking funny.

It literally it actually drives me fucking insane. I'm like, why are you here?

Why don't you stay home? Like if you're gonna stand around it is so bewildering to me. And then I think the other thing though, that we have to take into account is like, again, we are not people who drink a lot or like, yeah, we're not people who like are drinking casually, like the average twenty two twenty

Because we're it's the purge. It's the purge. It's like the four month five month purge. We just every four months we like blackout, like that's it.

Yeah, you just get as drunk as you can, and then you go to parties and you take flash pictures of people you don't know who you make fun of behind doors, and then the next morning you wake up and you find a two minute long video of y'all walking up to that person and flashing them. Yeah, we're the flashers. We'd be flashed banging people.

Wait, we're not. Let's get it straight. We're not showing our tits and ass. I'm showing a win.

Also, I thought when at a party we had gone to, I wore a button up shirt that like notoriously unbuttoned. But I didn't think about that before going to a party. In that shirt one time and I was like looking through my camera roll and I my tits were just out, like, but that's okay because I like girl them. As of

Let me see the nipples real quick.

But yeah, also not anything against like smaller boobs. God, I want nothing more than to have small for like.

The past like five years, all Inya has talked about it's like a three month obsession once a year, and it's like I want a breast reduction so bad, so.

All the clothes I like, everything I love, Like I just was not meant to have boobs, Like it just makes absolutely no sense with who I am. For me to just like under all this silliness have fucking huge tits. Like that makes no sense.

I think it does make a lot of sense.

It's like the thing that was like why the weird girls in school always had big ass tis.

I saw a person it was like, we need to stop telling the sexy people they're sexy, start telling the ugly people they're ugly. Sorry that was random, But was that all pot Yeah? I think so did so funny.

But you know what really fucked my brain up is like growing up in Miami, all I wanted was to be thick and have huge tits and a huge ass, Like that's all I fucking wanted growing up. And then as I got older, I was like introduced to like different body types and I was like, oh my god, actually I enjoyed my body type. But then my boobs grew way later in my life, Like when I was like a senior in high school, I was like a be like almost C cup and it wasn't that big of a deal.

Like so like I know what I mean. I was like, I was like virgin alert, but I have a lot of sex. I need to make that clear.

I don't think you do.

I bone I literally do.

But anyways, I like didn't have I didn't start growing boobs until like late junior year, and then I graduated and I could freely wear like shirts with no bra except if you grew up in a Hispanic household. I'm sure you've met this or just any like culturally.

Cultured household, not white house it is I think even in.

White households, like parents telling like girls to wear bras is such.

A thing, but like, yeah, no, that is because dads are fucking creepy and sexualized.

Yeah literally, because like parents are like I know what it's like to be sexualized or it's like ie sexualized, and I don't like, I don't like this.

Yeah, so I don't like what I'm feeling.

Right now, So you get duld to put a bra. And then also, like I was just telling ju this, Like one time when I was walking down Melrose, a homeless man looked straight at my boobs and I was wearing a white t share it with no bron and he just says, nice nipples. And then from that moment on, I swear all my life I wore brawls because I was like that was the final straw But anyways, once I turned like twenty, all of a sudden, my boobs

I always knew you're a D, just like the way like they felt.

And so you have not felt my boobs in your life.

Let me touch your boobs. I've like played with Orion's boobs before, but you haven't let me.

You don't get to touch because I have these like huge fucking mommy moves. You just broke that fucking bracelets, would you get, bitch? I love this bracelet I have vine still I didn't break mine. Oh is that the bracelet a follower gave us and you just literally broke it while we were filming. I love it.

I've worn it every day since. It's so fucking curee.

I know, but that's the reason I don't wear like handmade stuff like that. And I just keep it in my jewelry boxes because it will fucking break, especially your ass. You'd be touching it. I know.

I'm like fiddling constantly get a fidget.

Don't do that to the mic bitch my check check. But yeah, what was I saying? Basically, I don't want fucking tits. I'm over it, but I will say here is my my resolution is is this summer I will have my tits out and see how I feel about them and if I love them, and then if I don't, I'm gonna start heavily considering your rest reduction. But again, like the vaccine, I'm just too lazy. Like imagine actually having to do that, and with my luck, they would like puncture my fucking heart and I die.

With your luck, they'd like make them different sizes, they make them bigger. Oh, we thought you wanted like to make them.

We thought you wanted an f cup.

We thought he went in basketballs there volleyballs. Do imagine you woke up from a breast production with volleyball tits on your chest.

That would be the last to me, And then y'all would have to publicly be like she she did it, She ended it all because she woke up with huge tits. Again. Also, like when I talk about this uff publicly, I feel bad because like, for instance, my sister is a situation where like she needs a breast reduction and wants one for like health reasons because literally her back is about to break. Her boobs are way way bigger than mine. And when I complain to her, she's always like shut up,

This is my life I live. Listen to me complain.

That's why we have this. That's what this is.

This is the complaining podcast.

This is just the hour of us complaining.

And y'all have literally y'all listening to our untreated ADHD for an hour every day.

You are really going in on touching. Huh, you can't stop moving.

I know I can't. I know what it is. I think it's because I didn't have a red Bully.

I did order fidgets.

I need a fidget really bad.

I got to do that. Fidget was the best thing I've ever gone. And it kind of makes me insecure because then I see how much I actually move around. I'm like, when I've been public around other people, like the thirty year olds, They're like, what is that?

And I'm like, it's my child toy, my attention toy. No, literally, this entire podcast, I've just been sitting here like in my head, like I'm moving so much, and I don't know why. It's not I'm not even uncomfortable or like anxious. I literally am just moving and touching.

I've been scratching my nose a lot this episode, Like I keep reaching to touch my nose and like my face. Yeah, that's also because with my nails, I can like get scratched sensations that I usually can't, so I'm just enjoying them. M hmm. Maybe it's because you need to hit your fucking puff bar, you freak. You're itching for your puff bar. That's what's happening. Drew had an addiction the puff bar. That's the end of this episode outing Drew Phillips. Drew

But no, not a single no one even gets no care, No one cared, No one cares about us. No one cares about us the way they should. And it hurts a lot.

No.

I literally my lungs are like filled with like just jizz. Yes, No, my lungs are just filled with like popcorn. I'm at this point, I'm pretty sure, like from the vape. Like literally this is like like since I was seventeen eight.

Dude, the way like not this is not something to brag about, but the way we were on jewels when you had to order them online.

Yeah, we had to order jewel pods.

They did not sell them in stores.

The feeling a Mango jewelpod, Like when I hit Wes's jewel for the first time and it was like that Mango jewelpod. It legitimately changed. No, we we were smoking mint before Mega. Yeah it was mango. Mango was dropped and then that changed my life. Like because I was like dabbling, I was like what, No, actually, I was in full blown what I was gonna say?

You were like you were the reason I got a jewel. I was like, these things look fun, except.

Nicotine doesn't work. To do it for it doesn't work. And I've tried, yeah, literally, you have literally tried to actually like become a jewel fiend. But let me go back to the like the first time I hit a Mango jewel pod, like it was like a sexual awakening almost, it was like a coming to God moment. It was like the way that shit made me feel like is not normal? Like what are they fucking putting in those?

Like that's not fair. I never got there literally just like got flavor.

Oh so bugging good.

I like remember when we all used to be so onto jewels in high school.

Like going on eBay and looking up rare jewel pods.

Like dude, even before that, even before like things were rare, when it was literally like we just had to get someone who was twenty one to order them offline for us, and we would just like order them online and just have jewel pods like this is like like tenth eleventh.

You know the displays that you see in the cabinet at like smoke shops of the jewel pods, like you would we would order like a box of those at a time.

Yeah, you would order a box of them, and they were like relatively cheap and like you could get dude.

Actually, no jewel in the beginning was expensive as fuck, like a jewel.

Like starting cartridge was like forty bucks.

Yeah, they were like forty and then they went down to twenty, and then they went back up to thirty and then now they're literally like two dollars a cartridge. Like bitch, I was buying Mango jewel pods for like sixty getting.

Them in fucking bulk, like we were going to Costco. Yeah, like you know how families go to Costco and get things in bulk. We were getting jewel pods and bulk.

Literally. Wait, something that like is not spoken about enough is how like in California you don't need a subscription to go to Costco.

Like you we need to look that up because I saw TikTok about it. But I think it might just be the the liquor store of Costco U because they want everybody to be an alcohol like, so they'll let you go do that and buy bulk alcohol. But I don't know if it's for the store itself. But yeah, I've I've tried to dabble me being like, oh, I've tried my best, like but I really did because I feel left out of the culture, even though like, thank god, I'm not sure just dropped a fucking bead loud as shit,

I like I have like full attic brain, Like I literally am, like I can quit any time I want, but like I do, like when I go back to Texas, I like quit for like two or three months, Like it's just like every once in a while, I just need an escape. I need advice. So I like just like because other than this puff bar, I have zero vices, which like I think vices are sometimes healthy like their little outlets. Yeah, and this is my vice and I just need to be because if I wasn't smoking a

Yeah, sometimes you pick and choose your battles, especially if you like have addictive genes. That's why part of me is like, I know, like there's a lot of discourse again not to like condone smoking, but like there's so much discourse about like puff bars and shit, And I'm like, bro, do you know how like it was so common for people to be cigarette smokers. Puff bar is just like the new cigarette.

And it's just the history is repeating itself. Fifteen years from now, we'll find out everyone has cancer from them.

Like I am so interested to see what happens. Yeah, from like puff bars and stuff.

I like the flavors, something big tobacco two point zero.

The flavors is what's so funny, Like they straight up were like fuck it, jolly.

Rander, something sweet for the kids.

Oh no, it's just a fuck the kids literally literally like banana lappy yeah.

Ew dude, cream Breulet. Do you remember that that ship was Ramcid crim lay jewelpods were fucking.

Literally get the nastiest flavors like for fun, and they'll pull up with like Coca Cola, Crime Breulet, Banana.

I remember when I was like fourteen years old, like vape vapes were like just invented, like the the not big fucking the box modular the babe, Yeah, the literal box mod synth vaporizers with like cloud atlass in them whatever. But I remember when those first drop, I like wanted one so bad because I found out you could get like juice without nicotine in it, and I was like, I don't want nicotine.

They were just one of those freaks, was like I want the big cloud.

I was like, I want to make big clouds and I want to learn tricks. And to this day, it's like riding a bike. You will once you learn how to blow like smoke tricks and do smoke tricks, you never forget. It's like it's something with your tongue, like you just do girl. Yeah, learning how to do vape tricks was really good for me when I was younger.

Learning how to make coming figures.

What the fuck? What kind of lingis?

If you ever had TikTok where there are some people who didn't know that word so they were bleeping it out. Did you ever see that no TikTok? There is that one like what's her name? Ash? Nico or Ashley Nico is her name? Me and your girlfriend paying just up the chi.

I don't know this.

It's like, O gave it your kind of lingis, but people like it's some ship like that she says, kind of lingus. And people didn't know what that man.

They were bleeping it was just straight girls like bleeping it because they didn't they.

Never felt love, intimate love.

Dude.

Okay, okay, again, no, I.

Don't are we talking about vagina song. I know you're about to go off on some vaginas I.

Am about to go up on some vagina ship. Because again, I don't want this to be a place where we were like fucking having horny talk. But this isn't even horny talk. It's about It's about female rights, woman's rights, I am. This is about women's rights and the fact that getting head is still for as a woman is still such a thing that men don't do.

They're like, oh, come on, come on, like yah, I was joking.

Because okay, DMI, but like I remember my first like intimate partner, like I just never even expected that. And I was doing the damn deed and doing my business. I was doing my part of the dealer getting absolutely nothing in return, and I did not second guess it for anything. And then as I got older, I was like, wait a damn minute second, that was an improper charity. That was an improper trade of labor.

I do my thing, you get me nothing.

Yeah that's the trade, and that's like the common thing. But yeah, that's that's my only take. I'm not I'm not going deep on that. Also, some motherfuckers just can't do it, So I guess if you can't do it, just don't even fucking try, Like, don't embarrass yourself and waste my time.

Literally, don't waste your time on my lagiint that was a bar.

The fucking face.

Well is that about?

It? Is that it?

I mean, we could talk about how I know for one thousand percent fact that I can cross the big red balls and wipe out without a doubt if they put them in front of me right now, I would literally go so besnowed.

You just say you couldn't carry a gallon of milk and you think you're crossing those balls.

I'm crossing those balls with zero effort, Like I'm just running like a robot across like like literally that's all you have to do is just run across like these bitches have the wrong strategy when they dive onto it, Like yeah, of course you're gonna fucking fly off, like bounce off your simple physics. It's literally like I have it all worked out in my brain, like physics.

Well, then apply to be on fucking wipe out. I don't think it's the hardest thing in the world.

No, I'm literally gonna rent them for myself just to prove it to myself.

I would love that because I would love to try.

That's my next video is like, literally, where are you.

Gonna rent that? You're acting like it's that fucking.

That sky zone you have to like, I'll figure it out. I figured out. I figured everything out there, you know.

Nothing. Literally yesterday Drew was like, I want to see a building get demol having to go do that, And I was like, sometimes when Drew's in my passenger seat talking in the car, I genuinely feel like there's an automated like AI machine trying to make something to relate to me that was just missing because I'm like, what are you talking about?

No, okay, I just want to see a building fall. It's poetic almost, it's like the destruction of humanity post capitalism, like buildings falling, it's beautiful.

And I have literally every TikTok the post capitalist ramifications of the deep popification.

Yeah literally, but I just think seeing a building fall would hit a spot in me that needs to be hit.

Yeah, I get that because I was.

It be beautiful like.

Literally, that was like when we lived in thirteen oh four and we like all had leg that weird and healthy.

So basically, no, don't even talk about it, don't it's bad. It's bad, Like that's something that stays.

We wanted to see buildings get like basically blown up, but like again, no one inside We just like it's just like wanting to see that kind of thing.

It's just like I want just destruction and chaos. Like literally, for the longest time, I just wanted chaos and then I got chaos and I was like take it back, please, I can't do that.

I want it anymore. And you were like, wait, why does that sound fun?

Why does that sound wit?

That sounds lit? I'm fucking stupid.

Yeah, well, should we just dive into media what we love for the week?

Oh my god, yeah, I'm so down. I have to grab my phone. That's my biggest habit or my worst habits. I don't know names and stuff off the top of my head. Like people will mention something to me and I'm like, I don't know what that is, and then they'll show the visual and I'm like, oh, no, I love that, and then I sound like a liar.

Yeah, well I'll go first. Last night I watched Frank and that is such a good movie. It's about this dude who is a musical genius and their band is locked in the cabin for a while and they make music together and it's really fucking good and all the while someone's documenting it and it's just their journey making music. And the climax of the movie is so cringey and hard to watch and it fucking sucks, but like in

I think you should grow up.

I've been reading a lot about that. I've been struggling, struggling with my identity. So go into that. If you want to feel really bad about yourself and literally never recover, don't do it. If you yeah, don't do that. And a song that I liked is from the movie Frank And it's I Love You All by the band in

Streaming services.

Yeah, it's on it's on Amazon for free.

That's awesome. Yeah a movie, Yeah, oh I guess not free. It's it's free if you have Prime.

Yeah, free if you have Prime. But the but the songs are like five of the songs that they made are on Spotify.

That's awesome.

Yeah. And that's my that's my media for the week.

Drew's media of the week, Now onto mine. I don't know that I don't have any like visual like actually, you know what Dirty.

Girls that I was gonna say, Dirty Girls and Batmobile were like, yeah, really good. I was thinking about that earlier.

So for like visual media, like a little documentary, it's like super short, anyone can take it in. It's Dirty Girls. It's really interesting. It's just about like young feminists, like feminism in like the nineties, and it's like these girls who are really inspired by like Riot Girls, and it's just awesome, Like it's it's super interesting.

Yeah, and it's it's just kind of it's a really good lens into like like like nineties grunge almost, and it's just like and it's also like crazy to see like how polar opposites like the culture was like riot girl feminism and then their bullies. Like the craziest part was the bullying.

Was gonna say, Yeah, but what's even crazier is like I feel like that's super prevalent in like middle of America still, and even in like popular places like I bet in those private schools in California, that's still a thing for like all the like now, like all girls.

I don't like that, Yeah, whatever, whatever, that's what you mean, but all like.

The al alternative like girls, and just like people in general, Like I'm sure they still get bullied like that, but it's a really good lens of like just human nature, like rejecting what feels foreign and like against.

What you were taught on and like and all the while the girls that were being bullied the whole fucking time were right. Yeah. Also it's on YouTube. It's like seventeen minutes long.

It's free.

Yeah, so that's literally go watch it, Dirty Girls. It's really fucking good.

And then for I have a book recommendation, Alisa, let me borrow this book. It's called Kitchen and it's by Banana Yoshimoto, and it is so fucking good. I haven't finished it yet, I'm like halfway in, and it's just really good. It's like a heartwarming story about somebody who's struggling with the passing of their grandmother and it's super sweet. Yeah, it's just fucking awesome and it feels really good to read. And then for music, anything by the Dirty Column like

Like traumatizing, almost like how good it is.

Yeah, it feels so good. It's just such a good feeling song. But yeah, that is my my media recommendations of the week. Also still Ariana Grande. I'm still on my Ariana Grande Nasty. Listening to Nasty super loud on repeat has been my trauma response of almost diving back into depression for the past week. Yes, and that's the second episode, so.

I hope I've enjoyed. Fuck you Leave bye.

Alright man,