Enya Got Catfished

We welcome back, Oh, welcome to this episode of mar And I've.

Been seeing a bunch of comments recently saying like, it's fitting that they say welcome back to this episode because I watch every episode ten times, so.

You're trying to I'm trying to.

I'm know I'm trying to fix it because we do say it wrong every time. It is welcome No.

But I mean, but if people are like, it's okay that they say that because I'm going to come back anyways, now, you're trying to like isolate them and like make them feel like fucking freaks. So every time they listen to it, they're gonna be like, have I been here before? I think I'm hallucinating, like I'm getting deja voods.

Literally everyone who is watching this is like we're experiencing a mass delusion together, like we're infecting them with our mental illness and they're being delusional with us.

I saw something recently that someone was like, I'm such a bitter like bitch and it's honestly because of Drew and Enya and I would never take a back and I was like, Charlie Demeneo, fans are like, I'm so kind and sweet, and it's because Charlie's guided me and people are like I fucking hate everyone. I'm like consumed with bitterness and anger and it's because of these two.

I'm such a hypocrite because like, when I hear shit like that, I'm like, there's no way people think I'm a bitter hater and then someone's gonna post a super cut of me saying like the most evil, hateful shit ever, and like I really am trying not to be mean. It just is in me. It's in me, and I don't think it's cool, trust me, but it's just in me. It's a part of me.

I just I think you'll never know someone nice unless you know someone who's a bitch, and I'll be the bitch in your life. Like, so then everyone else, you mean, you're like, you're like, I'm setting your standards for human interactions.

Really, who?

So then when you have interactions with people in real life, you're like, damn, they're being really.

Nice and it can only be up from you.

Yeah, I'm only sending you guys up, So honestly, I'm taking the l for y'all. So you guys should be happy and stop being a fucking bitch to me.

I saw another comment that was like, I don't think I've heard these two actually have a genuine conversation in the last twenty seven episodes. Every single thing they say starts with I, and it's just like it's like us responding to each other with our own It's like not a conversation.

No, it's literally like the infamous John mulaney like quote from one of his stand ups where.

He's like when I I just wait for people to finish talking so I can talk.

Exactly, that's exactly how we function as people. And then it made me freak out for a little bit. I spotted for a little bit and I was like, am I like a conversational narcissist?

Like?

Do I make the conversation about me every single time? And I was like, is that how my friends perceive me? And like the people in my life perceived me? Like, am I a conversation narcissist? And I was like, I don't think so, Like I don't think I make every single conversation I've ever had about me, but like it's very easy like for me to do that, so and I've done it a million times on here. So I'm

Know if I ever have perceived you that way, but maybe it's because I fucking do the same shit. Because right when you were finishing that, I was gonna be like I and then I was.

Like, wait, no, that's the word.

But I don't know.

In my head, I'd like to think that most conversations are the person talking about themselves, because that's what you have to cater to your interaction with other people is yourself. But I understand what you're saying because I fully fucking do that with so many people. I can name people

Yeah, I don't know. I'm trying to think if there's anybody that I like see like I hijacked the conversation and made it.

I don't, But again I don't.

Is that like how a conversation goes though, Like I don't know how a normal come from. How do you talk to other people? But I'm like also, like a majority of the time, the person that I'm interacting with like I have zero things in common with, and I'm like okay, Like like I'm I feel like this unneeded pressure to carry the conversation and like I have to be the one to carry the conversation because the person I'm talking to literally doesn't know how to speak.

That's what I was thinking is most times where in moments where I feel like I'm being like the fucking hijacker or terrorist of a conversation, it's because I'm talking to someone who's like maybe naturally a little more quiet than me. Because then I think about my conversations with like Nat, Me and Nat can just like talk for fucking ever, and it's like I don't feel like either of us are like saying too much.

Because nat can she's a good talker.

Yeah, So like when we talk, it's literally just both of us talking like almost I would maybe say an insufferable amount to each other, but because we're both like pretty like yappy, we could just like go on forever with each other. Yeah, and with Oryan too, Like actually with Ryan, I don't even know.

What the fuck I talk about.

Like we literally we speak like a different language when we get into a room.

And sometimes when we're talking, I'm like I'll.

Hear us, and I'm like when we sound so crazy, like we don't sound normal.

Yeah, I feel that. That's like how I feel like like talking to anybody in the friend group, And I'm like, if anybody actually heard these conversations outside these walls, like if these walls could speak, No, if any heard these fucking conversations, it would be like we would be locked away, like we would be fifty when.

So I even think about hypothetical, like what are they gonna do call the police on us?

Well, I mean like it's just a saying like that's.

Just like you would say that because Walts have never spoken.

Well, no, like it's like if they could speak, it's like it's the same.

If they could, I don't. I don't what did they have, Like first words, they wouldn't call the police.

Oh my god, you're like actually so fucking you're actually freaking me out right now. Yeah, conversation narcissists. I feel like that's you know, I'm gonna own that. I'm gonna own that and be like, yeah, I do hijack every conversation. And also I'm gonna become a vibe terrorist this year. I'm gonna ruin like I've dabbled previously, I've dabbled. I can ruin the mood for everybody, and I can just like.

I don't know if that was dabbling, you were like you were wearing it. No, you you know what it was. Now you can dabble because when you were at first of a terrorists, you weren't like really aware, like you were aware.

Of it, but I couldn't control SOO got it.

Yeah, And it wasn't like you were doing it on purpose. Now you can dabble for fun.

Yeah. Now I can walk into a room and just give off the worst fucking energy ever and just like like there's those people that walk into a room and like you immediately, like you can feel their presence and it's like it's like a great feeling that you're like almost comforted, and you're like you like look up at them and you're like wow, Like that's like a like that person knows some shit, has been through some shit.

Instead of lighting up the room, you literally want to turn off the lights and like flash.

Banks exactly, throw fucking flashbanks and like ringing sound and like call of duty. No, someone who, honestly, I'm like almost embarrassed to admit this, but someone who has that like aura for me with someone we experienced yesterday in the grocery store, and like when I saw Sean Mendez in person, I'm not kidding, it felt like like there was like this aura like it there, do you know what I'm saying, Like there was a presence in the room.

And he was wearing a cream sweater, which was reflecting a lot of life and making it hard for me to walk around delusionable.

And he was following us.

We followed us everywhere in that fucking story. He like was obsessed with That's so weird.

He was like kind of like at one point, I heard like a and then I was like, oh my god, is Shawn mandaes in here with COVID?

Why is he sniffing like that?

And then he was really closer us, and I was like, oh my god, is Shawn Menda sniffing?

Yeah? It was like fucking diabolical. And also he made eye contact with Kai and they had such intense eye contact that he crashed the cart into his homies. And I just had to say that for Kyle Or.

It was literally he saw us and like maybe by some chance he knows that we're like some of the most evil people on the internet.

And he literally got like scared to.

The bone because he knew to sit on MIC's the next day and make up a story.

And lie about lie about the interact.

Literally, I'm like first phone and like texting his publicist.

Like like no, he like pulled out a fucking like razor and held it in my neck. I don't even want to get into that.

No, he literally, Okay, like Shawn Mendes seems like a sweet person, but he literally carries a shank around And I'm like, we're in Arewan, like.

You're good, You're good, bro, But no, he did. Like we were looking at the vitamins, Okay, he followed us around the store, like we're not joking about that, Like everything else is a joke.

We all just so happened to be going into the same exact.

Funks and we do him to it every time. And I know he was I know he was insecure.

So we would get to an island, he'd be right behind us, and like I.

Kind of my instinct was to like leave immediately, but I was like I was here first.

No, I was here first, And I'm gonna be loud and obnoxious, and I'm going to say the most absurd ship.

Polish thing is what also does it help us?

In air one of my favorite places to be loud and obnoxious because I feel like the people in there feel like they're safe from freaks in there. But I'm like, you're the fucking freaking I'm gonna make you.

But yeah, we were in the Vibe aisles and we were looking at just like weird holistic bullshit, like per usual that I do because I believe in it. And we were looking at these boxes and we were standing in front of this row and he reaches over my shoulder and completely invades my personal space. I know that kind I was like, weird, right, and I felt you know what it felt like. It felt like that one interviewer where he was like, can I smell your armpit? Because like his armpit was in my face and I

Yeah, you did do that, And he seemed like a sweet man. But he didn't say excuse me, which.

I was like, yeah, which I gave him a pass because he is she and mendally like he is like that bitch, but like he is Shawn Witherspoon. Yeah he is Sean Witherspoon, but no, he he also interacted with this baby in a very sweet way in this baby in her and her mother, and I was like, oh, like he is just a guy. But then I was like, I can see right through your publicity stunts, like I can see that you want people to see you being nice to this baby. But I just like I just

But why how do we even fucking get there? Oh you're talking about it?

He had an aura literally talk a light when you enter the room.

He said something, this is your life. Yeah, I'm so annoying.

I saw him in an iron. I literally turned and like walked kind of goes and I got.

That's Shawn mendous.

And then we turn and we walked back and I looked at him and I was like, I have.

Such a knack for immediately seeing people.

You could have your mask on, you could have your fucking sunglasses on, you could have your hat on.

Bit I see right through all of that, Like I am so I don't know why.

Like because I don't claim to be someone who like necessarily cares for celebrities by any means, but I can point them out really easily and I'll be like, I don't know their name, but that's someone from that and then the person with me will be like, oh my god, that's literally Bill La Lah and yeah that's my story, and fuck.

You cool bro, like good at recognizing people, like you have a pattern seeking brain. Like Okay, I was gonna say that I was also in the room, so maybe the energy that you were feeling was No, actually it could be Kai, it could be your energy.

I was gonna say, no, actually, all day yesterday not only was it raining and like scary outside, but like you were with us, which definitely added to like dulling my senses. But then when we got an Iowa with them.

I will say, Kai, like you do have a you do have a comforting aura, like genuinely I genuinely mean that, but like not in that scenario that that was.

That is definitely outshining. Yeah, you see, you can't even take like a little compliment and go with it. You have to like, why are you trying to beat Shawn Mendes right now?

Like you know, Shann Mendes has a better order than you.

He has beautiful hair like a beaniean. I thought, yeah, but he had his hair like fluffing out, and I was like, you've got beautiful.

Hair also like the richest man in the world.

You better have.

Good hair better.

No, but k I, we love being around you.

What I have to bring him back because we are so mean the Kai on here.

People either think we hate Kai or we want to have sex with him.

And that's true.

We do hate him.

You can decide if the other one is true that I do not hate Kai.

No, I don't hate him at all.

Do not bring me in that, do not bring me.

I never said I hated Kai. I literally never said that.

You just did, you psychopath? You scary y'all are trying.

To fucking gaslight me. I've literally I never said that. I said I love Kin. I love being around him.

Tweaker Okay, and watch I bet Kay is gonna edit this all funny?

So oh my God, now you're gaslighting us. You're a master class. You're a master debate, You're a master class gas lighter. We have nothing else to talk about. That was the episode of to Day. Thank you guys for watching. It got really fucking awkward just right there. It was so awkward, and.

It got awkward because y'all were pitting two men pitting against a woman when all she.

Needs is as it should be, as it should be.

My hate for men is seeking.

Oh my god, here we go, here we go.

But I'm saying, like I think I need to like go to like a workshop to learn to like love, because it's like seeping into my other conversations. Like when we were at dinner and we were talking to uh, our friends, and I was like, I literally shure. It was like I think men should be putting cages, but she agreed.

Though I know, which is awesome, But I need.

To be careful because sometimes I say those things around like random men who I don't know that well, and it looks like they're gonna punch me in the fucking face, which like adds to like my fuel for hatred, but like also my fear.

Yep. Sorry, I'm like literally trying so hard to think about what to talk about.

And you shouldn't think. You should just talk. That's the fun. That's the best part about being us is that we don't think. We just talk and we fill the world with things that it doesn't need. We're not giving anything, we're taking.

I actually have never like really like thought about this, but Kai constantly does have this like radiating like black cloud around him.

Do you see I can't see it?

What I don't see it? Oh, that's weird that you don't see it. Yeveryone else you're used to it.

You were born with it, Like you don't. You don't realize it.

We all talk about it all the time.

I thought you were even saying he always has something next him and there's like a little wet paper towel next to him. I thought you were gonna say he always has a little wet paper towel next to him, But he doesn't.

That's literally mine.

That's actually one of my worst like things I do in the house is one, I use so many paper towels.

Oh, sue, sue me.

I use so many paper towels, and I just wet them and like carry them around the house like I'll hold onto it because I'm like, oh, I don't want to waste this. I'll wipe something down with it or whatever. But then I just leave little damp.

You know what I do that's so fucking annoying is I'll be washing the dishes and I'll get halfway through the dishes and I'm like, oh, like I want to see what's happening on a TV or like something. So I like dry off my hands with a paper towel and I throw it in the garbage and then I get right back to it. And I do that like three or four times. So by the end of the fucking dish washing session che chession session. So that's that. Such.

Are you rebooting?

Holy shit? How was that? You know where you are right now? What was that you?

I think you were just like you stuttered and then you like rebooted.

No? That like literally I saw like matrix coat in my eyes. I was like, so fucked up. Did y'all put a screen in front of my face?

No?

I don't even have like a screw.

Oh my god. It was like the Matrix rain but Rainbow Rainbow code.

Wait, are you having an LGBT reboot?

No?

What the fuck was I saying, session by the end of the dishwashing session, I like the gifts basher session, the badger session. I like, just dry my hands off and wash my hands like thirty six zero times.

Also, it just doesn't help that one time we told Josh to get paper towels for the house and he accidentally ordered a thirty six pack jumbo roll.

Yeah, so we have infinity.

No, but it's dwindling down.

We have like four more left, which is actually really disgusting that we were able to go through that many so fast.

I was like, damn, this is gonna last for as long as we live here.

Yeah, but I use them like I use them to, like honestly wipe my ass.

Sometimes we know, but that's not a joke off. No, but I know when we run out of toilet paper, we wipe our ass with fucking paper towels because we're so lazy.

And no, when I'm saying, when we have toilet paper, I'll use paper towel because it's a little more gritty and it exfoliates my holes.

Oh yeah, I do like the blood like I do like I do like when it like etches it.

Knowing people who have had hemorrhoids literally has sent like a new shockwave of fear into my body that I'm like always convinced I'm going to get a hemorrhid.

Or have a hemorrhoid.

Yeah, I'm convinced I'll get one too, but I don't think I will, Like I feel like I already would have if I was going to.

Yeah, I've never had one before, but like it's literally a fear.

What the fuck is a hemorrhoid?

Even, I'm pretty sure.

Literally strain your butthole and then there's a little like feasure.

Then yeah, I know what it is. Like, I know it's like a little it's like a skin tag that like bubbles out a fisher. A fisher is like a cut. But I don't think it comes out of the cut. I think it's literally like a whole different thing.

Oh. I thought look it up though, because I thought hem word was literally from getting it gets infected from poopy butt. But Kai's kay saying yes to me, and he's seen a lot of.

Things like swollen and flamed veins and the rectum and anus that caused discomfort.

Oh, then what am I thinking of? That's just like from shitting too.

Hard.

Huh.

Yeah, see I thought it was like a pro lapse like pink sock situation, you like pro lapsure butt, but just a little.

Bit like saying that so casually and conversation is disgusting.

Goatsy. Do you know what goatsy is? Look it up on your phone right now, everybody listening. Don't look it.

Up like goat like a goat?

Yeah, goat sy and go to images. Did you find a guy? How did you look up goatsy?

It's like hiding it.

Oh all right, this isn't like as bad as like a pink soft du.

Why is this considered a goatsy?

Okay, never mind. I just saw like a really crazy one and like, I don't like that.

Yeah, don't look that up.

That is so scary. That's so scaries to get my life?

Did you ever eat a blue waffle out? Have you ever had a blue waffle before?

I need to look I haven't seen blue waffle in so long. I think I think Google scrubbed it, though you can't look it up anymore.

Being told to look that up and looking it up in front of your friends in school was so fucking embarrassing.

Literally, I loved it. Personally, I thought it was hot, Like.

I thought blue waffle was like a real thing, and it scared the funk out of me.

It is or is that edited? No, it was real to Meucci, It was real to Meucci, Nuill Chicken, No, that's not real, but I I it has to be.

You think that there's something that's going to make a vagina blue like torquoise blue.

Yes, like colloidal silver can literally turn your skin blue. So like, I bet there is a disease that will make your skin blue, your vagina blue, I have in it. Like I don't want to argue with you on this because I literally have to believe that it's real, Like I have to for my own sanity. Like if it's not real, I'll freak the funk out.

Why would you want that to be real?

Because it was just like such a part of my life.

Part That's like if I just like started talking to you about how santsa isn't real.

And you're like, no, no, no, I have to.

It is?

Is it really?

No? That's true?

You're pussy blue, Like.

She's saying blue waffle isn't real. But I know there's diseases that literally, like literally cyano bacteria can get into your fucking blood or like cyanosis, Like.

Yeah, maybe hypothermia can make your couci blue.

I gotta look this up. Is blue waffle?

I just looked it up and it said, now.

Here's where your vagina is blue during pregnancy.

No, it literally is fake.

I'm like, there's no like.

I swear to God, I thought it was real with my whole life that.

You actually asked me if I had blue waffle before.

No, I knew you didn't have blue waffle before. I would have known you had blue waffle. That's not like.

No, Like you're dumb for thinking that one was real, like when you fully believed it.

No, you're lying, dude. No, I swear to God, I thought it was real on everything, like on and literally everything. I thought it was weird. I'm smoking blue waffle path. I need to get in there and shave some of that off, like truffle onto my pasta and eat the blue afful balls.

Yeah, the cream cheese, blue waffle, cream.

Cheese, blue waffle truffle. Oh wait, I.

Have to see what it looks like a blue waffle truffle butter.

I have to see a photo of the blue Waffle.

No Google scrubbed it. It's like hard to look up.

I wonder what the new version of like telling someone to look up blue Waffle is.

Dude, I still feel like it's like kind of the same shit, Like because I've been seeing a bunch of viral videos go viral recently of like the jar man or whatever, the jar video.

The guy putting a jar in his ass.

Yeah, so I've been seeing like a bunch of remakes of that, and then like also those like one.

So you've been seeing remakes of people putting jars in their ass?

Yeah, because like, who doesn't like that's hot? Like people like that. Okay, it's not that weird.

Are kids still like talking about two Girls, One Cup?

I don't think so.

Damn Blue Waffle.

And two Girls One Cup arks those are classics. Does we need the retro those? We should remake them.

As they're still coming up?

Yeah, Astar is still around. There's also the scary mas game is still that's like a rite of passage. I know, like you have to do that.

But I saw one I was like, that's not fair because they were having the girl play it, but they just had her following it on the TV.

Which is even more mean, Like literally you're close up to it.

But yeah, Scary May's game is so good.

My siblings were just scared of literally everything and anything. Like my little brother was scared of horses and monkeys, huh. So we would show him pictures of monkeys on his iPad and run after him with them.

Have I talked about when we used to call Madaline. Yeah, there's that one fucking picture. If you look up like ugliest girl ever, Dude, that's so mean. If you look up ugliest girl, that's like so mean.

If you look up ugly scirl avere. Did you know that a picture of Drew comes up?

But we used to look this up and like literally put it as like the background to all of our computers in the house, and like we used to tell Madaline like this was her, like this picture was Madeline, and she like used to cry her eyes out like it was so fucking mean, and she'd never lived it down. And to this day she's still creepy ugly guy. And I'm gonna send it to her right now to traumatize her.

I'm trying to think of what else you were.

Oh. I remember as a kid, we would make so many email addresses because we were so bored like that there wasn't really anything.

Much to do on the on the computer and like on the internet, like other.

Than playing cool math games, and we would make email addresses, like I really yeah, we would just make them for fun so that we.

Could like our generation is like, yeah, dude, we used to do the most boring shit.

Oh my god.

I don't know if I've ever talked about this, but I remember in fourth grade, this girl who I really didn't fuck with and I fucking hated, came to school this maybe it was no, this was middle school. This was like six or seventh grade, because okay, whatever, maybe it was fourth grade, Oh it was.

It was so in fourth grade, this girl comes.

To school and she's like showing pictures of her boyfriend. Like she's showing everyone pictures of her boyfriend on her phone.

And like to clarify, I did not go to school or live in an area.

Where this where white people really existed, like like I literally like I we didn't know any like just like straight like obviously, like there was like kids who were white but Latin, but like even that was a short amount, like I was like one of like maybe ten kids in my whole like grade who were like Latin, but like no, just straight up like buck off the farm. Motherfucker's like that was like was not a thing. So she's going on showing this picture of this boy and

You, we're like nine.

So I'm like or like ten, So I'm like, you're dating a sixteen year old? You're dating Yeah, you're dating a fucking sixteen year old. So I was like, let me see, and she shows it to me and it's literally one of the most popular like scene boys on MySpace.

Yeah.

Ever, like if you look up white emo boy with blue eyes, wait, I want to.

See, Yeah, I want to see if I can find the photo.

But I saw it and I didn't say anything, like I just go I dude.

I was such a conniving, fucking cunt, even at the ripe age of ten. I go oh that it's literally that picture.

I go, oh, that's so sweet, that's cute, Like, how'd.

You meet him, and she's like, oh, like your family friends. And I was like, oh, wow, what school does he go to?

And she just like.

Starts like pulling shit out of her ass and talking, and I was like and he's.

Sixteen, and she's like yeah.

And everyone's like, oh my god, you're so fucking lucky, Like what the fuck? Also, mind you, this was like during justin Bieber time, so all of us couldn't believe that our girl just bagged a white boy with blue eyes.

We were like, girl, you're so long hair and long air. We're like, you're you're the luckiest girl on planet Earth.

Yeah, except me, because I was like, bitch. We got to this fucking class and it was computer class time.

Computer day.

Yeah, it was like computer day. And I go up to the computer and I like, pull over one my friends and I was like, you want to see something? And they were like yeah, And.

I look up white boy, white emo boy with blue eyes and her boyfriend comes up and I click on it and it's just like a MySpace link.

But because the school has a firewall, you can't.

Even get to it, but you could see that it said MySpace on it, and I was like, wait, what.

Is this not Cindy's boyfriends?

Like, so, me just airing her name out, but like I don't even know her fucking last name.

I don't know where she is.

But yeah, and then I told everyone and it was really embarrassing, and I called everyone O where.

I was like, guys, guys, what the.

Fuck he doesn't go here? My boyfriend doesn't go he's from a different school.

She's like, yeah, he's from a different school. And I was like, why is he like famous? Like I was such a bitch. I was like, wait, he's all over Google, guys. We should look up our names and see if we come up.

And like, obviously we were not coming out so mean and really tormenting this girl.

Oh hell no.

Yeah, and that's what you get for being a fucking liar, Like why are you lying?

I mean literally, we lie all the time.

No, we lie because it's fun and it's loving and it's a game.

She was lying for attention.

Yeah, which I also do.

Yeah.

I was gonna say, like there's there's there's not much of a difference. There's not really much of an argument. I just I was just thinking, like back to stupid shit I used to do, And I was like and like like I never really had any like moments like that.

No?

Oh, it's like this thing like do you know what Xbox three sixty is?

No?

Oh? So girls really don't play video games.

I don't know.

Okay, saying do girls poop? What do you know what poop is?

I know, like, no, you're making things up right now. You're just saying words to me.

You girls don't poop and they don't play video games. What girls don't play video games or poop?

I knew they didn't poop, but I thought that they maybe play videos.

Okay, I know what a video is, but what is a game? What is a video game?

It's like something you play on the TV. But anyways, one of the most evil things maybe you'll learn from like this story. So it's like, how do I kill this? How did I burn this to the ground? There was, uh, we were playing Halo three Forge or whatever we were playing Halo where it was custom matches and me and my friends took it very seriously and we had this one kid join and we literally spawn killed him. No, I can't even tell the story. It's so bad. It's

I was definitely a bit of cyber bully, but I was just a bully in real life, which we've talked about like forever ago. But like I was just I was mean and I was definitely projecting my anger onto other people.

Girl, this is a crazy fucking story. So like Webkins was like all the rage, Like it was like Webkins was like the it game, like you would beg your parents so badly for Webkins, Like me and Maddin, like that's all we asked forever were Webkins. And we got like a pretty decent collection going, and like we had a really fucking cool house and we had like the the really rare items that you got with like the new Webkins and shit, and like we would trade our

Rightfully so, we're just being naive like sweet kids, she decided to take advttione.

Of Yeah, literally, just like, don't fucking come from me, because I will destroy you, kill your family. I will burn your house down and plant C four in it and watch your That's my favorite fucking thing in the world is to say I'm gonna blow something up with an RPG, Like I fucking love that.

I have never said this publicly, but I just thought about it.

I've been catfished once in my life, and it, Oh.

My god, I don't even know if I know what you're talking about.

No, you don't, because this is so embarrassing. Holy, this is like this was literally back. This is so funny, funny, No, this is in sixth grade like some mind you I'm like literally twelve or like eleven or twelve, and I was a big fan of Shake It Up and I was.

I was on Winner and like I had like this like Twitter or I don't even know how I met this person. I don't even know if it was on Twitter, I don't know what. I think I met them on fucking Omigel.

Oh, and I was on Omegle.

And this person straight up was like I'm Bella Thorne and I was.

Like, oh my god, are you fucking serious?

And I didn't have a phone at the time, so we talked on Kick or I did have a phone, but we spoke on Kick because I was embarrassed because I had an Android and I was like bellaphone definitely has an iPhone, like she's gonna see my messages, agreed, and I'm sure so or subject. Anyway, we spoke on Kick and she would straight up like we me and this person, whoever the fuck it was, like, I don't

So fucked up there.

Like yeah, everyone's like I'm better because she's a better dancer.

Everybody, did you ever talk about her?

Like she'd be like, but everyone always bullies me because I'm dyslexic, Like it's so hard that you would just like randomly bring that up and like me being like, oh my god, Bella, you're just a person, Like how long did this go on for? It probably went on for like three months, like it went on, Oh my god. And I don't know why we stopped talking, but I think I just like came to the realization I was like, this is not be.

That's like.

Moments where I'm like, oh my god, no word, are you serious?

That's who you are right now?

Holy ship? Well that's fucking hilarious. I like I remembered that story halfway through, but I like forgot how fucking funny.

Dude, Like people make funny because I can't dance and I have dyslexia, Like, which is so funny for this random person to be like me being that can't fucking dance and like adding that to her character being like Bella Thori is secure because you can't dance as good as.

An that's so fucking funny. I'm trying. There's like a in a bear and like in like seventh grade when Call of Duty Modern Warfare two is like crazy. I was obsessed with like j tag x j tagged Xbox with xboxes, which is like hot swapping like the disc so like you could like play like hacked CDs on it, and like I wanted a j tag Xbox so fucking bad, but like I just didn't want to get in trouble

I do that shit all the time.

And then like when certain things like when you're like ordering like from a dispensary and it literally asked for front and back photos of your fucking license.

Uh, your license.

I was gonna say, your license, core, just your license, and I send it, and I'm thinking, like this is so dangerous.

I really just don't care about my identity anymore.

Yeah, but in my head, I'm like I'm such a public figure, like which doesn't correlate at all, Like you could be a public figure and have privacy, but I'm just.

Like like y'all can have it, Like, yeah, if they want it that bad, maybe they deserve it more than I. I mean, maybe they.

Deserve my identity more than I.

That's literally what I'm saying is like, my identity is already stolen in like the dark webs, and it's just being flipped around and cycled. And I probably have thirty six cards opened under my name, don't even fucking realize it yet. And my credit score is zero negative five thousand. So at this point, I'm like, literally, I don't give a shit, Like I don't care. I don't care anymore.

Sorry, I just remembered because you're talking about being on eBay. I remember during the like one direction, like fucking hype and my face, when I was a huge fan that letter jacket, the letter jacket that was so expensive.

It was one hundred dollars, which like now for like a new you talk about this twice nice made one. I'm like, okay, but I remember I felt like I was.

I knew my dad was paying way too much money for it, and we didn't have the money to be spending that much money on anything. But I think he felt bad because I wanted to go to One direction concert so bad, and Dante got to go to Ultra like every year, and just like one direction, tickets were so expensive compared to that, so he like saved up and got me the jacket. But I remember when we were buying it, I was like, this is a scam,

Oh my god, I was I thirteen when I went to that fucking concert.

Now I was like fourteen, but I rememberber you now, oh I'm thirty eight.

Because I'm just turning sixteen.

You're older, You're aging rapidly. I thought you just turned fifteen.

No, I turned sixteen in March. Sorry, I should have just said that. So I just turned Oh okay, yeah, but like it's really weird for you to be like whatever, be having a podcast with me.

No, it's not. We can be friends. I'm like a mother figure. Yeah. Anyways, I remember when I bought the tickets.

I was so scared that I was being scammed by like a scalper or whatever the fuck they're called. And I remember up until like I went to also Dante went with me to that concert. I remember up until we were getting our ticket scanned, I was like I bought fake tickets, Like I know, I bought fake tickets, And I remember that anxiety was like so deep.

It's so funny how like now it's.

Would you have if you like, would you just yes?

I believe it was yeah. I would have been like I loved it so much, like I loved it it was like to this day.

Because my dad would have been so upset and then also felt like so bad for me, So I would have been.

Like I loved it, like it was awesome. But it's so.

Interesting to think how like buying anything on the internet used to be like there's a sho ninety nine percent chance.

You're getting scammed.

Like it used to feel like anything.

You're buying on the internet is probably one hundred percent likely that they're just stealing.

Your fucking bones, like like literally like you're getting shipped bones in the mail. Like that's what I was always scared of, was like bones and rocks.

And now it's like there's of course you could still get scammed, but like it's so easy to tell in most people on the Internet are like real people who are like.

Trying to see my dad gets scammed all the fucking time by Instagram ads all the time. Like there was there was the most absurd fucking thing I have ever seen in an ad in my entire life. And it was like this like remote control like floating shark, but like not like the Helium one. It was like the It was the most absurd thing I've ever seen. It was like an RC flying like and he was like, oh, my fucking god.

I need that, I need that.

And he spent like twenty five dollars on it, which red flag number one, like an RC shark is not twenty five dollars, like a three hundred dollars ordeal. He got it in the mail and it was literally a plastic toy shark that you get from Dollar Tree, this big and it was like just a hunk of plastic painted and that's what he got and like to I won't let him live it down.

Oh my god.

Wait, he buys so much shit off of the internet. He just discovered Amazon like this last year.

Yeah, my parents recently like made the splurge for them supposed to be like fuck it, We're gonna get Amazon Prime, and they like buy the most dumb shit ever. Like I walk in the house and I'm like, what is this And my mom was like, I got it off Amazon and.

That's like our only expedition.

I wonder what the percentage of the population is that has Prime, Like it's gotta be like upwards of like sixty percent now or is that like too high.

I feel like it's probably a huge number.

I feel like it's super common, like my parents. But I just remembered actually in eleventh grade, I got scammed off grilled, and I was so fucking I was literally so mad because my friend, like a close friend at the time, Patrese, I was getting him. We would always joke, and what made me more annoyed is it was kind

And then it just never came and I was so sad. I was literally so upset.

I was like, that's like before Brail had like authenticity yeahs and like buyer protection and shit like yeah.

Because now it's like if they don't ship that shit out in like forty eight hours, like you get your money back.

But I remember I was like, can I please get my money back?

And he was like fuck you. I was like, you're gonna die soon. Like, trust me, I know these things.

And you're actually probably dead.

Yeah, I know he is. I actually visited his grave and I pissed on good.

Like we worked on a fucking grave. I bought so much fake shit off of Grailed and didn't realize it was fake until years later, and yeah, that's just like my life. But there was one thing on eBay that I bought that I was like certain. I was like, Okay, this has to be real, and it was that Supreme face mask. Yeah, and I bought like that Supreme face mask and it was like the normal price. But then like I recently found it and I was like, is

Yeah, Grailed was like because those are like the worst people in the fashion game. Yeah, it's like like not everyone on Grailed now, but like at that time, it was just like pieces of shit, kids who were literally scamming kids who lived in the middle of nowhere. It was like the piece of shit kids who actually lived in like La, who were buying real pieces, taking pictures of that shit, and then like selling the fake ones of that piece so that they could keep buying real pieces for themselves.

It's honestly genius.

Yeah, it's really smart, but they fucking suck.

Yeah, and I hate them.

We just got swindled and finessed. But that's okay, dude.

Remember our Supreme Tea era.

Oh yeah, Like, I so badly want a white Box Logo T shirt right now. Like, I think that's like, regardless of your opinions on super Like, I think that is just such an iconic piece of clothing and I

Else there is also Like it's funny to think about how like the the market of Supreme has changed so much, like when we were buying shirts in twenty seventeen, Like those like just their like random drop teas were going for like one fifty yup like when you say oh, like they were like two hundred like up. And now I think it's like really cheap because they make so many fucking shirts that, like I don't know if it like cost do.

Their drops even sell out anymore? I don't know who the fuck is buying Supreme like on drop day anymore, like genuinely like like I don't know who.

I feel like there are people who are doing it. I mean like I did want that bug set.

I wanted a bug sex oh dude, and that I loved that camo jacket the was it Junior Wantanabe? Yeah, yeah, I wanted that so bad.

The fuck is happening?

But yeah that that was a cool collection. But Supreme like literally freaks me the fuck out now, like it I haven't tied to such like dark like ego thoughts.

There's nothing on the site. I don't know what's happening, Like I can't navigate it and it's freaking.

One time, at fucking we were at like a high school football game and I was like wearing like a Supreme hoodie or something, and it was like the first time I was like ever actually bullied in person, and it was by this kid that I grew up with and like like we literally shared the same last name, so like we were like homies by like force in school and he was like me and tag War are supreme fits to the football game. And sure enough, this motherfucker,

And well didn't he end up also dying because there we have talked about there's such this weird thing when people bully us and are rude to us, they do pass away soon after.

Yeah, it's fucking weird. So if you say anything fucking rude about us ever, you'll die. It's like actually so scary.

I mean it's also they were like proud of, but like it's definitely like it comes in handy.

Yeah, it's a curse.

I'm like really trying hard to see like how much like this is fucking saying this?

Okay, I'm what.

The hell are you looking up you've been looking at for fifteen I.

Was looking up the like Supreme tease because I was just like, I wonder what the market is like, like I want to know like how much like they're being resold for Like are they still.

Two hundred dollars?

Are they still selling?

Am I tripping? Like there are a lot that are still selling for like two hundred dollars? But I mean, like going into one of those shops like around two, like are all the tea is still that expensive? Because I remember even at the end of it, some teas were like eighty five dollars. It wasn't like it wasn't like, which is still crazy, but I think I think retail they're already like sixty dollars, so like paying twenty dollars

Like, oh, that's cute.

It's like, oh damn fifteen bucks for this, like and then look at the way.

They and I don't think it's like a real the real like Mike Kelly thing.

They did not, but like it's what the fuck is wrong?

I'm gonna go up to the camera.

Way, No, you can show it. We can have Kai insert it.

No, but it's just so funny. It's not gonna show. But I'll tell how.

To like show it because I was like fifteen dollars. That's that's a good deal, honestly. And it's literally cut up like a fucking maniac. No more Diy cutting your shirts.

Or no more little it's the little Hoddy effect, Like little Hoody is doing it, so you can stop. Let little Hoddy do it.

Once little Hoodie is doing it, it's done. Yeah, But I will say, we watched the High Pals.

Show, and I'm like, no, little Hoody, like all of them are like cute except for that freak of zoid, freak of nature freak bitch Alex Warring is And I'm not to stand that motherfucker. And I hope you hear it. I hope you hear us like berating him making beay. Let me let me be clear, everything that happened to him in his past is really sad and tragic, and

Dude, he's a fucking freak of nature.

One the way he talks to his girlfriend, which I guess, like if you watch the show, yeah, sure whatever, I guess there's like some like resolution at the end. And I'm not about to tell like that sweet girl to like walk away, but you know the saying if you find yourself in your relationship being like no it's good.

Sometimes, babe byway, babes, babes. That's no way to know, because that guy is a fucking freak.

Dude.

The way he talks was driving me crazy.

Also, just like that show is just kind of sad, like more than anything. It was more sad than it was like obnoxious and like laughable. Because as someone who's a part of a friend group who we do film together and we do work together a lot, I'm like, holy shit, I wonder if people think, are they people like that? Definitely think that all the groups in the world function like this. And what's crazy too, is they kept considering themselves like this group of friends friends before anything.

Yeah, it would be very weird and like, I don't know. It Also, like it made me really sad because that show, like very obviously was supposed to be something completely different from the beginning, but like certain people backed out in like certain people's contracts sent lineup and they couldn't figure

Dude, It was.

Actually one of the most boring things ever. Yeah, it felt like you put a camera on random kids.

Yes, but it was very entertaining at like some points, like it picked up this like like when they stopped talking about all the SOB stories and like got into like what are their names, like Barn and Jadenner.

It's like Baron Rylan.

Yeah, Baron Rylan and little Huddy.

And like Chase like that was all of their camera time to me was fucking.

And then Maria Ravin and Larry like.

Yeah, they were like, h hilarious.

They carried the fucking show like for me personally, like anytime they were on camera, I was reading for them and I was like, these kids.

Are so I know, if they like spent more time filming those like cruise, it would be way funnier.

But literally like not us, like confirming what they were saying in the show where they were like I just feel like it's very split right now. I'm like, yeah, girl, for your reason, Yeah, it is very.

Funny when this y'all are boring and they're funny.

Y'all are too existential and like so like I guess, I don't know. We've been lucky, but it's not even luck. It's by choice. We made it this way. We made it this way where we were.

Like normal people.

Sorry, yeah, we're like normal, we're carrying out normal friendships and we just so happened to make content together and like do it naturally and it.

Would be a different story like the way they would be, like.

When they went on that trip together and they were like, no one's making content. Like I'm like, I thought, like the whole thing was it of this was like y'all are friends and rekindling like friendships. Yeah, and they just kept like the way they talked about making content and like.

Just really weird.

But I guess that is just like a side of the Internet that we don't really understand because we don't make content one nearly as much, and two with that kind of ideology. We really make content at our own free will, and we do it because we genuinely love doing it.

I guess that's the other thing is like.

They were thrust Yeah, and they would talk constantly about how like a lot of them don't like doing what they do and like we do the things we do because we like doing that.

Yeah. And also Alex like so badly wants to be David doe Brick that like, I know.

You know what's fucked up is he made me look at him and be like, damn, maybe David do Brick is a decent person. Like and that's when you know it's bad. It is because I'm looking at this like copycat and being like, damn, the real one's better, dude, like at least be a good person, like if you're gonna like I don't know.

Again, Also, I don't know this motherfucker personally.

He could be like the the nicest, sweetest angel ever.

But they could have it could have just been like reality like TV bullshit like that we all know happens and like painted into the bad light. But like I'm sorry, like you can blame it on the edit, a blame it on the edit, but you said those things and he said those said it. Yeah.

Also I stand Thomas, I stand his girlfriend.

His girlfriend, Yeah, I know she eats.

She's like the most grounded person ever. Like I'm sure some people are gonna be like, bitch, I'm not watching this fucking shoe, fuck you.

But I think it is like honestly way more interesting this way than it could.

Have been, like if they had it really interesting because it's so like sad that it's like very real.

It is like a really real thing of.

Like yeah, of just like a lot of people in entertainment, like especially this part of entertainment, and I like get it.

It is like a big fear of.

It's so accessible to so many people now that you can be easily replaced, and it's like this fear of like wanting to stay on top. But again, I don't know. In my head, I'm like, you can't do it this way.

Yeah, but that's like, but I do that, Like I use y'all as ponds.

I mean, look at this.

That's that's why I, Like, I honestly was like fuck a podcast, Like I never want to work with Drew again. Like honestly, I'm gonna go move back to Miami and never speak to these people again.

Yeah.

And then like I was at lunch and I overheard the girlfriend, uh call her daddy. She was like talking about how much money she makes, and I was like, oh my god, Like I like need that and I want that. So that's why I started a podcast.

Yep. No, I literally genuinely ne mine.

What were you gonna say something?

Mean?

I literally have to take his xanax before I like get on here, because if I don't, I'll freak the fuck out and punch you.

What the fuck hate you?

Oh my god, Alex Warren did not break his foot.

What a piece of show you did? Not, Like you're such a pussy foot.

No, you did it because you were on the fucking roof of your trailer literally the next day, Like, I'm sorry, you did not break anything. This is an Alex stupid, fucking, stupid fucking cart that you wrote on little freak bitch.

I just I Also, I just don't like fucking content in general, like whether it be like Alex Warner David Dibert content. I don't like when the content is making your friend like the butt of the joke or like that's the whole thing.

Is like yeah, because they had a peabody kid, that's literally obviously their Jonah, And like the whole Jonah situation makes me very uncomfortable. It always has, like because that's not even his fucking name, Like it's just like he he heavy guy, like funny joke, like we're gonna make him the butt of every joke, and I'm like also fucking alone.

To add on top of it, Like literally, one of Jonah Hill's biggest pet peet with Hollywood is that he like gets typecasted as like the bigger guy. Yeah, and this guy's whole thing is calling his bigger friend Jonah Hill, Like, oh my god, you're like doubling down on this like narrative, I don't know, Like again to each their own.

Do I hate watch all of their content?

Yes, because I'm a fucking loser and I love keeping up and being like this is laughable.

You're a freak.

But yeah, they're still making money off us, and that's genuinely all they fucking care about. Yeah, at the end of the day, that is all they care about, which, like I wish my brain work.

I'm just gonna start endangering you guys.

Like I'm so down. Like I've said it before, Like you can stab me like randomly at any point, like as long as it's non lethal, just because one, I want to know what it feels like, and two like it would make a fantastic story.

It would make a fantastic episode of the podcast, just the audio literally, but yeah, and that's my take on the hype House Show. Honestly, if I'm going to like put a number on it, six out.

Of ten, really like pretty, I was gonna say like a five, four or five.

Yeah, I'm just I'm giving it a six because like I watched the whole thing and I was like, I was like, we did watch weep.

We binged the fuck out of it.

So like I'm like anything that's like even brain rowdy enough to make me binge watch it, Like there's obviously something here and I'm intrigued by these people.

So you'd agree with my take on the Madden Dragons and that they have to be doing something. It may not be for your brain, but to have every song you put out have a billion streams, you're doing something, You're doing something you like. It's true, it's true, it's true.

It's all fou everything I do.

Everyone, anyone who is brave enough to make something for the public eye, they get kudos for at least that.

How about that everything?

See, the thing is I'm talking and I'm saying something serious, and you're just like ignoring me because you want to take your turn to talk next.

No, I'm singing a song and it's for you, for you, It's all for you. Everything I do.

I tell you all the time. Heaven is a place.

On Wait, it's like literally making you tear up a little bit, like come on, that's my song?

You like the bad Girl? Here's that tue Okay, sixty three minutes.

Damn, damn, damn alright. Media of the week.

He they should have got James Charles on that high pal ship. I gotta know what was.

What connection did you make there? Lo ANTHONYA James Charles? What was that connection?

Did he used to say that?

Oh? He said?

Video of the week, Yeah, go piss girl.

My video media of the week.

Has been in these videos where people show how to use different kind of knives, and I'm not kidding.

That's like all I can watch, like how.

To cut every cheese, how to use every Japanese knife, why Japanese knives are so expensive? How to cut every kind of shellfish, how to prepare any kind of meat? Because I'm so fascinated, like what a good.

Interesting prepare my meat with a knife.

I can prepare your meat with my mouth, circumcise it.

And then my audio media remind me by ptrees Russian dirty work Steely dan Uh and don't tell your mother by the Sundays Kiss one Another, don't damn.

Fuck. I'm just gonna scroll through my plass and pick a rand song Boom right side off my neck by Fay Webster, I Kiss your Lips by Tokyo Ghetto Pussy and no we already said that one. It was me but by Claaro Tee for two do da Me mix kiss omadic Uno mas Paranoid Android by fucking Radiohead. Okay, radio kid, a kid a's son or in Rainbow's daughter? And you can't kill yourself?

What is in rainbows?

Oh?

The fucking Radiohead?

When you said, oh, fucking kill me weird, I was just but you have to choose.

I'm killing myself.

No, you can't, you can't, you can't.

This is a son who likes Radiohead. I'm fully fucking kid.

You choose a son who likes Radiohead or a daughter who likes Oh.

A daughter who likes in rainbow. In rainbows is a vibe like if it's a girl who likes in rainbows, I'm like, okay, I get it. Mister Presciana. You're serving but you.

Know she's smoking weed and drawing that one art style.

No, because then I'm breaking her hands and she's gonna have to relearn to use her hands.

Okay, And I want to see what YouTube videos I've been watching recently, because.

Other than plane crashes and near death experiences.

You know, that's all I watch. You know that.

I literally I live to live and die for a plane crash video.

That's what duhould have said.

You know, what's fucked up? Is all I've been watching videos? No is keyboard videos is like really good sounding keyboards. Hold on, let me show you.

Oh oh you don't have YouTube premium. It's like the worst thing ever. You're literally you your main.

Oh that's good, that's good, Like.

I know I feel it in my penis. Yeah, but yeah, I watch those all the time. Like literally, that's like kind of all I watch, me predicting the big thing coming and it being the volcano exploding and sitting a tsunami and killing a bunch of people. But recently I've been thinking, like nothing is gonna come, Like I really do think. Yeah, literally, I think like we might be

Erry is coming.

Really I need to see.

I need And it's like delta, but instead of losing your taste and like smell, it heightens your taste and smell m It makes you high as fun, like you get high as fu and then you want the munchies.

I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna do a bunch of whippets.

Oh this, what is that? That's a classic. I'm gonna retro that. That's a class. This is one of my medias of the week, Doctor Octagon. Whoa that was like band, original band, kid humor. I can't.

High like beans.

This is getting copyrighted. We can't push this up.

I love beans, how about you? I don't think so. It doesn't even have a copywritten thing.

In this description, say town, I can use this on my YouTube for one of my next colaches and not get canceled.

I've been watching them. There's that there was like that monkey versus Dog uprising? Did you hear about the.

Donkey versus dog uprising?

Yes, I forget where it was, but like there was a I'm not kidding, there was like a battle and like they were killing each other. So what happened was these dogs in I think somewhere in India attacked a baby monkey and killed it. And I'm not fucking kidding. These monkeys went on like a genocidal rampage and killed over two hundred and seventy one dogs. And there's video of these monkeys dropping and throwing these dogs off of

You're literally talking about a dog and monkey war. I'm on the side of the monkeys, honestly.

No, same, like the dogs deserve it. There's like an actual gang war in India going on. I'm not kidding. Look, but yeah, they'd just be like, they're just killing a shit ton of dogs and they deserve it. And it's because allegedly killed around two hundred fifty dogs to take revenge because they killed one monkey baby, which is fucking insane. Oh I love nature, but no, that's like that's gone beyond. Like that's like human intervention. Like that's insane. Like that's gone beyond like nature.

Like that's like also monkeys learning habits from like.

Which is kind of scary. I still want to smoke with uh Caesar. I still want to smoke with Caesar from Planet of the Apes. I think I feel like that would open my mind to like a lot of things.

Okay, thank you guys so.

Much for listening. We could keep going.

You're so fucking stupid.

Maybe guy just wants me to cut me off always.

Yeah, I'm cutting you out of my life after this. Fuck you. Thank you guys so much for listening. If you were the person, if you were the person who catfished me as Bella.

Thorne, let me know and if you could and or if you wanted no, no, no, if you if you if you could do the thing, if or if it could figure it out, then we could know if for sure there's something wrong.

One of these days, I'm gonna bring a really big, oversized pair of scissors to set and just sucking, chop your mind.

Do it ode oh, do it to me?

Okay, bye

Mm hmmmm