Drew Is Losing His Mind

I'm done.

I'm not doing it.

I'm like, actually not doing this today.

I'm not.

I don't want to.

Take okay, never mind, Like I just I want a moment for attention for me. And you need more comments about you, you.

Like need it.

You said you were done, you said you were tapping out.

And Drew's actually tapped out.

I'm literally done with this situation. I'm done.

Wait what does that? What does that mean? The podcast are?

Like me and I was joking when we welcome to this episode of Emergency in their Combat.

I was starting it off as a joke.

Oh oh, you just left, and yeah, I feel like this is your fault. Honestly, you came with this crazy.

You're literally gaslighting me. I like, you're back. You pause here from.

That he paused his game to be here, I literally did. I paused elden Ring to be here. So I hope you guys are really excited and happy about that and a little more appreciative of me, because as much as I give, I can take it all away and I can ruin all your lives.

Oh my god, I like while you were talking, I.

Was basically your god.

I wasn't thinking about what you were saying, because I was trying.

To think of a good elden ring like el No.

I was gonna say, I was trying to think of one that's like elden ring, this elden ring, that what you need is that phone to ring with some bitches on the other line, Like I was trying to think of something like.

That, But what you need is a cock ring el ring, elden ring, cock ring. I slept for two hours last night. I've never once in my life, I never once have I had I wouldn't call it insomnia, but it's like, that's not that's not fair, that's not I'm not allowed to claim that because I know people who have that and that's really really gnarly and scary. But me, whatever I went on in my body last night was actually terrifying.

I thought you were gonna say, like take melotonin no tomorrow.

No, I mean restart the game, because I have this theory that when you die, you just restart the same life over again. Oh, it's a it's an infinite loop.

That one sounds so fucking boring and like not cool.

I know that. It's that's what scares me the most. It's like what if, like when we die, we just wake up, and it's like that's what deja vu is is, like we just die and then wake up.

Well, that's pretty low.

I wouldn't mind. Personally, girl, mine is boring. This is boring.

It's boring because you decided to dedicate eight hours a day to a video game.

Yeah, because I'm trying to escape this reality that I've lived three thousand times already. You wouldn't get it, like you wouldn't get it. No, but last night I genuinely like could not sleep, Like I would close my eyes in like like like be shaking, like trying to like turn my brain off, but it just ran for hours and hours of late. I had like a Popeye's Coca Cola like at like nine thirty, which is like my best guess because I I don't have soda passed. I try not that soda passed like six.

I literally have rarely ever been affected by caffeine like that. When I was in New York, I was on that in Dom's house, and I did like have a coffee in the middle of the night, like literally at mid and I did stay up till five am, which is very rare for me to have a coffee late and like actually stay up at that night.

I was I was up, and I was stuck, and so was my boner and it's up. And I heard somewhere that that's.

Not even what that means, and twist, that's not even up and it's stuck means But I might.

Be wait, what oh you're saying.

I thought Cardi b meant like it's up and it's stuck.

Is like he stays hard around her, like his cock is like belligerently hard.

Yeah, that's what I would assume. I heard it.

That's what it means. Ky, you should look it up, Kyle, look up. What what did Cardi beans mean?

Then it's stuck?

Yeah, I heard it something maybe like I don't. I don't know if I'm wanted to say this, but like Comie's stuck inside. Hmmm, it could be, and that's you're gonna find out.

Well, no, it would come out kind of. I don't.

Oh, ladies always pee after sex.

Always he after sex. I literally have like never had a EUTI.

And I think that's why, because I'm so paranoid about getting a UTI from not peeing after sex that I don't give a.

Fuck about laying around and being sweet. I will get the fuck up and run the piece.

This is what the article says that, But for Cardi b the words of their own meaning. We know she was joking with Fallon when asked about the meaning. Oh this is okay, So it's a joke. I fucked up, So I need to actually find out the real meaning, because.

Yeah, meet your mic again. Yeah, like, sorry, shut up, we got a we got a mic in front of Kai and literally he takes every opportunity to speak again.

Mean when I asked him a question. But I slept like a baby last night. I had a really good sleep. I woke up naturally at like nine forty am, like the sun.

Oh my god, I actually almost threw up doing that the sun. Like are you okay?

You're like actually losing it? Are you sleeping with your eyes closed right now?

I'm doing this micro sleeps. I'm doing this micro dozing sleep.

Stupid.

But yeah, I slept like a baby personally, and I felt so good to be my bed.

A Zool was with me. I need to take a Zool to the.

Groomer though, and get her belligerently shaved because she I was like covered in lotion because I'm.

Like, she's a soft girl. She likes to lather herself and make her skin oily and slick.

No, I'm an exzma girl. And I put lotion on my body and it sucks it up within like two minutes and then I need more. But I like had lotion all over my body and a Zuel.

Got onto me and every all of her hair was sticking to my face and it was freaking me the living fuck out.

But I fell asleep watching Evan and Caitlin.

The answer.

They would never be on this podcast.

If it's up, then it's stuck. As a phrase said, when something is popular or going to be popular. That's what Daily Wrap Facts says.

See no, it means boner.

We had our brains in the gutter. And really it's about success.

It's about a success story about women, and you guys sexualize it.

Oh men, Yeah, I did. I'm not gonna apologize for having a libido. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

I'm just I checked another website. It says.

It says kaigh as stupid and silly. It smells like ship.

It says, if it's up, then it's stuck. Means when Kay's boner is and Drew's ass.

It says that on the websiteonization and it's your fault.

It's not from Drew mentioning creamy. I'm going to be your little cream pie.

What are you going to be for me?

Though?

Your little kind of lingis.

Dude, you said something to Kaile on like the last episode.

You were like, no, CO said it to you the husband's stitch, and I had never heard that in my life.

I never heard that in my life, and.

I was like, I don't think I showed it, but in my head, I was like really like actually, like like when a kid hears a new word and it's like, oh okay.

Like that's like, well, Kai sent me a text message of a comment. I'm avoiding the comments now, by the way.

I know, I can't read comments because people were like going in on me and.

Like listen, oh no, I can't read comments because they're not going in on me. They're talking about O Ryan And I'm not even gonna address it any further than that, because if I feed the beast, people calling.

Or I'm sexy.

Yes, you know what it is.

We've just garnered the horniest audience ever because if there isn't a guess, the comments are calling us sexy.

So it's like any like any new human who.

Like they can feast their eyes on their like, oh fuck, fuck fuck.

Put any of y'all a room with Kyle Ryan, and I bet you don't say a word. I bet you freeze.

No, I bet they fucking hump their.

Her.

You guys freedom, Like if person, if you meet me, hump my leg I'm begging. I'm begging. I need it. I need to feel something.

Sometimes when I see Ryan after not seeing her for a long time, I also hump her legs.

Yeah it's natural. It's literally like she has that power over us.

Yeah, She's just it's animal instinct.

It's like I have to Yeah, I have to like reconnect my pheromones with her knee cap.

On my cooter. The behind the knee pheromones are the best in the body. That's what they say.

We need a knee cap to cooter integration right now with me and Oriyan.

Like anyways, Kay sent me a comment that said, you know it's when I'm hold on it said something about me literally being a genius, and I just have to read it.

Oh my god, I'm thinking, like, you see, my life is like, oh, I can't read comments anymore because everybody like likes to say that I'm like.

A piece of shit, cunt fucking bitch, So you know they're not wrong, but like, shut the fuck up, because I'm gona smack the shadow you. I'm gonna double down and beat you up.

Uh. Brea Lester said, I feel like no one mentioned. No one mentions how Drew is always using such advanced vocabulary and he uses it so casually, which like proves that he actually understands the word, or actually understands what it means. Like, what the fuck is ergonomic?

I thought, it's what the ergonomic is not a.

Big Did I read it wrong?

What the fuck is ergonomic? That's what I thought?

Yeah, what's what the fuck is an ergonomic? Yeah, that's how it is.

That is not a big word. Y'all are just dumb?

Oh okay kidding?

Hella jealous about them calling his farm like that's actually a really fucking small word, and you're just stupid shit.

I mean it is. It is a small word.

For Drew, for me, for me, no, I said for me too.

But if you asked me to spell it right now, I genally couldn't. I just looked at it for three minutes. I could not spell it.

You know what, You're giving me a lap dance later, You're giving me a.

Lot to twink about. I mean think about right now.

I am not a twink.

I thought about that joke on the toilet like that, and I was gonna text it to you.

Then I was like, no, I need this to be said out loud.

Yeah, that was fire. You're getting like super offended. I mean that is like borderline. I hate crime. Meant, yeah, that was That's an derrogatory term. And I'm revoking your ally ship until further notice. And I'm sorry. I'm sorry until you apologize.

So I never claimed to be an ally like you can't take for me when I'm never had.

Oh I got yelled at by Frank Leebowitz.

But on fucking Meth and K two at Madison Square Garden, they had what looked like Frank Leebowitz.

If she wants hut you off for a saying that's insane that you mentioned K two because I mentioned K two to all of squad the other day.

Two like, uh, we did not go through K two face No.

No, not through us doing it, but like looking it up and like.

Being like like watching all the weal went their K two dabbling face yea, no, like all the like the fuck atim me? Like I was so convinced. I was like, I'm gonna accidentally smoke K two, Like I.

Don't know how well, one day I'm gonna put K two into like something you're smoking.

What if it actually like it's the real me, Like it's it's me, but it like resets me. And I'm like actually very like I'm like doubling down on like being like the most like calm person.

And I'm like, it's a d MT trip for you or a ayahuasca trip. You know.

What we need to do is people need to learn that they can have those experiences and shut the fuck up about it.

No, that's like part of it.

All the side effects are like, oh, you could possibly like trigger schizophrenia. Like no, the worst side effect is that this motherfucker will never shut up about it.

Like that's the worst side effect.

After my episode where I just talked about my ketemine treatment for ye.

That's different because you're a human who doesn't get to naturally enjoy happiness when you get it.

That is what you're saying, Yeah, you get the pass.

What was I saying on K two and Matt oh Okay?

Yeah, So literally it looked like if they before Frandly Woods like entered like the like queer community in New York. She was taken away and held kidnapped under Madison Square Garden for sixty years and then they were like you have to work here now and to just let her out in the like stadium and I yeah, I was just being yelled at and fucking harassed by her, and she had a death wish for me, and I was being so.

Nice, Like she could sense your bad energy.

She could.

Some people can do that. I know.

You know what I think it is.

I think sometimes look at people right here between their collarbones, and the color that surrounds them is their aura. And you're giving white aura right now. I don't know what it means, but I can see like.

A white No you're seeing my shirt?

No, No, there's like a white glow behind you the wall. Did you know I sang the intro in the HBO thing the O and I played piano for succession. I did I sang it singing it?

You sang the piano?

No, No, I sang the HBO like intro.

But why did you say you sang it and then do piano movements with your arm?

It just sounds like you're getting right now.

But the thing is, it's like forty three of my vocal stacks, so it's it's actually physically impossible for me to do it right now.

Don't have the original file. Just show us, Just show us the file.

That's a breach of my contract.

So there's no way that's it. It's like so public, so like it's.

A breach of my contract and they can kill my family if I.

You signed a contract with HBO to sign over the life.

Of the fix man, I really need. I needed that hit.

Literally me when I go down my K two era. Yeah, what is K two? I don't know what that is.

It is a synthetic chemical that when you smoke it, it causes insane hallucinations.

Isn't it like gmo weed? Weed?

Yeah, it's it's it. That's what it was advertised as. It's like weed.

I think like if you change the chemical compound structure of a drug enough, it doesn't have to be that much. It's legally like not.

That's what delta is. Do you know what delta is? It's literally just like the loophole in Texas and like

Does it hit different.

Or I'm gonna hit you different but not like and I'm.

Gonna tap that differently very sexually, and You're just gonna.

Hit me physically violently, and then you're gonna hit me sexually.

At the same time I'm gonnattack. That's perfect's dream scenario. But K two is like it was advertised this week. But when you smoke it, like you literally turn into you like enter like an actual other dimensions. I'm kidding.

Someone actually accidentally gave me K two when I had my bad high, because like when I see videos of the way like people acting windows and literally I literally was running away from my friends in an apartment like they scared me and I thought they were gonna kill me. And I was like running around and screaming like there's no way I didn't have K two, but my friend also took some of the edible, but my slice probably had more K two in.

It, more spice.

Yeah.

Literally, I know some people who've done it, and uh they described their trip as they were like you know the ziploc bags with like the little piece that slides across the top. They were that piece across the top, the red piece that you slide across the top, and that was their entire trip for like fifteen minutes was zim sliding back and forth. And that was their trip on K too. So like if that's like and this is a very trustworthy source, so it's not like an exaggeration.

Yeah, so literally I have smoked K two. Not actually I'm just joking, but like.

My whole thing was that I felt like I was like the book page is being flipped, like like.

You just had too much weed. There's but like, where did you buy the edible?

I didn't buy it.

Where did they buy the edible? I don't know.

Was it from this little like gummy pack?

I doubt they put K too.

No, I'm obviously I'm joking. I don't think I actually had K two. But I'm like, I'm still so confused because I'm like, how are there so many humans who have not experienced that? But there are like plenty of people who have experienced it, and maybe they were like, oh, this is what being high is.

I just don't like it, and like they move on.

I've had my good eye on those weeds, so isn't there for like the last week and a half. I'm like, I'm like I get this like fiending every six months where I'm like I need to smoke weed. I need to do it. I need it, like I need it really bad right now.

I think you need to, literally, I'm not kidding, have like a show worth of that, and like you would be good.

I think as how low your tolerance is?

I think I do need the panic though. I think I'm like at a point in my life where i need to have a panic attack just to like purge it out. What I'm serious, I.

Have slept, like like you haven't slept. Why are you talking.

About you need a panic I just I'm at a point where I need that reset, that hard reset. Also, i cleaned out one of the dungeons and I'm actually worried because there was a shirt, a white shirt covered in black mold at the bottom of it, and I was breathing those spores for literally three hours cleaning out that, uh the boiler room, and I'm pretty sure that's what gave me in insomnia. They're attaching to all the receptors in my brain and keeping me awake and killing me from the inside out.

I don't think that's how quickly can go out.

I've read some stories.

Yeah, you're reading stories about people with like undiagnosed like conditions who then interacted.

I am gonna get Alzheimer's from this.

No, actually, you're gonna get Alzheimer's from using aluminum filled deodorant.

Girl, just entertain it.

Entertain you said, I said you are gonna get I agree, you are going to get Alzheimer's, but not from what you think.

Not from I'm gonna get Alzheimers, because I'm like alternative. It's like this new thing of Alzheimer's where you actually remember everything and it's actually really painful.

You remember everything. You trauma blog.

Yeah, yeah, I was talking to like this group of girls. You weren't that's true because I don't believe in women, and I don't believe talking to.

Them are giving them the time of this good. But I was like talking to them and one of them told me that what.

I was like, I put myself in the viewers physician now and hearing the say no, you weren't, like shutting your story down immediately, it's like, oh, like really jarring.

It's really jarring because like for a lot of people, this is their only glimpse into our relationships. So they're like, oh, I don't know if I would let I like, like if my friend did that to me, Like I feel like there's so many people who watch the way we interact and they're like I find it funny when I see it. But if my friend did that, I don't think I would hit them. I would I would have sex with them. And that's what I do with when he's being naughty, when.

I act up. She plays with me little toy like a ball of yarn.

And I'm a cat and you bat me around. We are kind of like mouse. We're Batman and Catwoman.

I'm Catwoman.

I'm Catwoman.

Why because I'm sexy fucking hot.

Batman was sexy fucking hot. You could be Batman.

I'll be Batman.

Yeah, You're gonna like there was no question about it.

I mean, no, you can be you can be penguin or the fucking cat.

That is there, like the cat's on the floor.

Or the bowl of milk, the bowl of milk that's fed to the cat.

Yeah, but no, I do feel like I've been giving Batman Robert Pattinson Batman recently. I feel like I'm like I have that energy. Read my aura.

Read your shirt. You were not giving anything.

Oh also, Drew, who got you that shirt?

Kai got me this shirt for my birthday. He promised me something else that I was really excited about.

It's like a custom thing that needs to be manufactured over the course of like.

Four in The minimums are like four thousand, as were the most unobtainable gift possible.

For like two weeks, I was dming so many people trying to figure out to get it made.

It is a plushy of this thing that I desire very deeply that if I have it will ruin my life?

Is it?

Is it? Actually?

I like I believed that, like is that a joke?

Like I was like, I don't think that's a joke. And then I for some reason thought I was like, is it the inside out Dad?

Or like I was like, is that the flushy?

I was like I could see him getting like.

I mean, I.

Am buying like a four thousand dollars like life size model of it.

I'm not saying that when I got to VR chat I have sex with the art or with inside out Dad. I'm not saying that. That's all I'll say.

It seems like.

That, Yeah, why would you even bring that up? That of us were like accusing.

You and that sex was It's crazy.

Literally mean, when I was fourteen on a legal.

Yeah me too. Actually, don't do that.

If you were fourteen, don't do that.

Yeah. That's like like did everybody have that experience? And we already wait did everybody have that?

I think literally everybody did.

And we just like all don't talk about it.

No one talks about it. I mean we talk about it sometimes, but it's like it is just like ubiquitous thing that everyone experienced.

That you like, the thing is at this point so many people talk about having done it that there's no way you were having esex with like another actual adult.

It was probably another fourteen year old.

Yeah on the other side, who was also being like, yeah, I'm a grown up and I'm so horny right now.

That was just our chat rooms, right, yeah, our AOL chat rooms.

Yeah, except it was with strangers and like I'm sure some people actually had like really gnarly stories. Really, I guess, like, yeah, there were definitely like creeps on there, but I was having fun. I don't know how we got this far off, but basically I was talking to a group of women.

Also.

Someone in the comments was like, oh, I love how Anya says like woman like like present tense.

And like when I had this conversation, but.

I cannot pronounce it any other way, Like it's like it's like the way I say crans, Like I can't like I'm not about to just switch up and be like crayon, like when I say like woman like, I like, that's that is me.

Oh my god, I say, crown, give me the crown.

Crown.

Yeah, I'm gonna draw with the crown. Yeah.

I can't think of anything.

Oh, Josie makes fun of my my volume.

Valuume, valuume, turn up the valuume.

I don't think I say it like that, but now I can't think about it.

And then there was one more. I don't remember what it was. It's like, Drew, you have a big cock or something like that.

No, it's probably like drem gonna spack the shit out of you if you look at me another like second longer.

For the listeners, I'm staring at her deeply.

Drew, you have a big cock. I feel like I say it normal.

Guy, you ate that up?

Thanks?

Why did I feel that in my penis? Like, okay, shut up, and you say it now.

I'm not gonna say it. I have a huge cock. I would have like a really.

Average sized penis. I think like it would like.

No, you would have either the tiniest, babiest penis in the world or like a monstrous.

No, you can't. You can't say like either side of the spectrum.

You pick one Okay, you would have a tiny baby penis.

I don't think so.

I think I would like be so like incredibly average that whoever I was dating, like before me, they had like seen a wheely small dick, so like mine was like impressive.

By like that.

But if it went the other way, if they like had a boyfriend who had like a huge cock and then they had me, they'd be like, I can settle. Yeah, like whatever I got lucky last time, Like that would be their idea.

It's like I got.

Really have a huge, like bulbous cock.

I think i'd have huge balls.

That you have a shiny weener, a shiny talisman.

Anyways, I was talking to a fucking group of women, woman, woman, I don't know, yeah, amen, woman, and we were talking about just like being girls, girls being girls, and we talked about like pregnancy, and one of them just told me this, and I've never heard this.

But I was like, oh my god, is that real? So I don't know if this is real what I'm about to say. One of them was like, oh.

Your brain blocks out a lot of the pregnancy pain you feel. Your brain will like trauma block it. And that's why as painful as pregnancy, is you have another kid?

You just got all that oxytocin pumping through your blood. No, Oxytocin is like a real chemical, isn't It's like when I hug.

You, the cuddling chemical.

Yeah, and like when you have the that was real. And he looked and you're directly in the eyes.

Behind his hand. He was like, it's the cuddling chal.

He's so embarrassed.

That was way too crazy. Like I've like lost like.

Yeah, so oxytocin is the cuddling chemical, ki, but it.

Is actually, though I've never heard of that.

Like when you hug me, we released.

You, I release fear whatever chemical fears, that's what happens.

To Wait, what is that chemical? That's like, yeah, cortisol and the kidneys. I got a scary text message.

Let me see, let me see, let me see, let me see.

Chet's see. Oh I just got a text message that said my name Drew, which is automatically terrifying. And then it says we need to go to a livestock show or rodeo. Absolutely we do.

You're so I don't want you? Who said that?

Oh?

Ryan, You're so stupid, you be like I just gotta scare you text.

That's every time I get a text message or a call from like a loved one, I the most amount of anxiety and fear shoots in my body.

Yeah, I will say the same.

Sophia called me right before we started, and like fear shot through my whole body because I was.

Like, I'm like, what happened? Who died?

It's the middle of the day.

Yeah, like you should be no matter what time of.

The day, No matter what time of the day it is. I'm like, it's the middle of the night, it's seven pm, it's it's only eleven. Why are they called?

Yeah? Exactly. It freaks me the fuck out.

Phone calls were made to scare you.

Text messages were made for love and arguments that you're not brave enough to have help.

Yeah, except I don't argue over text. I don't argue at all. I stay silent.

I'm choosing to disengage from this conversation. May too.

I'm like, you can talk to yourself right now.

There's a lot of anger in your words, and I cannot. There's a lot of anger in your words, and there's a lot of anger in my words, and we should not be having this conversation while we're angry, Let's take a breather and come back, let's take five.

I do think sometimes like an angry conversation is necessary though sometimes, like very rarely, but like sometimes I think someone needs.

To hear how angry you are with them passionate.

Yeah, like they need to hear, like because like if anger is just like another level of like hurt.

It's another level of love. Baby No, but I actually do agree with that. But no one can talk angry to me though, because it'll freak me out.

I just realize we have this slide on it, and it freaked me out because Kay looked at me and I was like, why is I so shiny right now?

They're like glossed over And it's because the light is right there. Look at himything. It looks like a little angel right now.

Yeah, let me read your aura?

Move over?

Why do you like? Why do you clean?

You have this ability yellow? It's literally yellow maybe orange? Yeah, I don't know.

Yeah, you're just saying things like what are you I'm gonna read Drew's.

Mean between my car, it's gonna be something sexual.

It's lgbt Q, it's rainbow.

I have the rainbow Aura. I'm an indigo child, y'all.

What does that mean?

They're like savants. I'm actually gonna look up ours yours? Yeah?

Should we go get our ours read today?

I actually wanted episode Patreon Patreon episode. Actually, we should go do that tomorrow.

So are you guys don't get to be involved?

Yeah, we're gonna go get ours right on the Patreon. Sorry, Okay, what the Oh? Yeah, yours was white?

What it's not like you? You can't see anything. Also, I'm literally wearing a white shirt against the white.

Well balanced personality. Calm and open the possibility. Oh my god, that is so kay. Yours is a yellow and it was a yellow.

It's not objectively yellow. That's like what you read, you know. So if it's.

Bad mmmm, fear of commitment okay, because they're tracked to them for the wrong reasons.

But it's very energetic aura.

Okay, that's good.

What is mine?

I don't know what you're doing.

So I look here and then there's like a ring aura and you can see it.

I see Wait, I'm not kidding.

I actually don't see anything.

You don't see it like like right here?

What does that mean?

Yeah?

Okay, let me look up in to go, You're.

Just saying what he wants. I hope it's awful.

Spiritually enlightened, in tune with nature. That's literally me I am.

Saying, I'm you are aural less. You're vibelest right now.

Because I don't see ship love and speaks of feelings, compassion, kindness and peace, I am all of that. I'm like a very peaceful.

This literally me.

Anytime I'm like I don't believe in like zodiac shit, like I don't believe in astrology, and then someone.

I'm like, oh my god, yeah that.

Is a black right now, there's like a oh my god, what's wrong with that? I saw a flame, you saw a flame. There was a demon.

It's because I'm your twin flame. I'm your what is it, twin flame, soul flame?

It's twin no y.

It's for some reason, I feel like this has been a really silent episode.

Does that make sense?

It's just because I am literally running onto It was just like when you woke me up this morning, I was so scared. Did you clock it?

No?

I was literally my heart was pounding because I was one. It's always the roles are reversed. I'm the one waking you up, and two I felt like guilty for some weird reason. And three I was like, oh my god, I slept through the podcast. We slept through it.

Oh no.

I was so shocked to find you sleeping though, because I woke up pretty early and I was like, should I go wake him up? He told me to, but then I was like, he's awake, Like he's always awake right now, So I just like chilled.

Would be what would be sleeping through? It would be like me just here alone, recording and then I go, can.

You record silence? And you're like listen. I clocked and I did my job.

Yeah. I punched my card in and then I punched it and I went home.

Yeah no, I just like was really terrified. I was like, oh no, but also like, you know, just like sleep fear, Yeah, waking up in fear.

It's like I missed it, Like I missed the appointment. I'm like for school. I'm like for this, Yeah, I'm like for school. We all know that feeling.

Yeah, do we have to bring backpacks tomorrow? It's field day? It's the last day of the six weeks. Do we have to bring our bags?

What does that mean?

Did you know that if a teacher doesn't show up for fifteen minutes that you get to leave the class.

That's some shit you say to your friends, and no one's ever brave enough true.

And also if you go up to a cashier at Dairy Queen and they're not smiling when you ring the bell, you get a free blizzard.

That's fucked up so fuck that, I guess not necessarily to them because like it's not coming out of their pocket.

I don't know if that's real.

Yeah, like, did you just make that up?

Kind of what does kind of mean? It's like this, it's a myth. No, I can't say the reason on the podcast. I'm mysterious now, by the way, No you're not.

I don't think mysterious. People say I'm mysterious.

Yeah.

I also don't think being mysterious means like looking around all funny. I don't think that's what that.

I do have a rainbow aura.

I am very horny right now. No, I can't touch you. I'll flood the kitchen.

Don't play with me.

Oh oh, do you ever yet?

I just need a moment of silence.

I physically hurt, like I have Like I'm so sleep deprived, I physically hurt.

Then go to sleep.

You're fucking complaining, like complaining up and down the goddamn walls.

Go to sleep.

Yeah, you could just pass out for like ten minutes.

And I can keep going and me and Kyle will pick it up, and then people will be like, oh my god, am I the only one who liked the like last like twenty minutes of the episode more than the like first forty When you was awake, Kai, what have you been up to?

I've just been chilling and like, Wow, there's really great before really great.

Sorry, I actually feel great now.

I have to look away from him because we were maintaining eye contact for a long time and I was like, is this like hindering his ability to talk?

No, No, it wasn't. It was it was energizing me. I've just been doing freelance stuff working. I got some more jobs recently.

Wow, so you're working for other people?

Are going on?

You're going on your spreading.

You literally have to work for other people because you guys.

Well, and we're not going to start paying you what you think you think saying it publicly is going to change that you're not getting paid ever.

Actually, I feel like that's what we can talk about. We could have a business meeting on the podcast where I beg you to pay me.

So age three, we turned this into h my payroll on the podcast.

And guess what, it's not going to work. And y'all can comment all you want, but I refuse to give this man a penny.

I'm not going to leave.

Stay have fun. You're too locked in.

I'm too locked in.

It's been forty eight weeks.

Forty eight weeks, forty eight hours.

Did you ever watch that first forty eight No? What I watched it with my family a lot like that was our family Show, which is kind of crazy. But first forty eight is like crime investigations because and it's like most crimes, like if they're not solved in the first forty eight hours, there's a chance they become cold cases and they never get solved. And it's just like murder, robbery, assault, physical assaults, battery charges.

What is why is it called that? What the fuck is a battery charge?

Abortion?

That's not a crime, drewe.

I guess should we get in? Should we get get in that abortion is a crime and that we're killing innocent babies?

I actually had a card to hear my mom where she was like talking to me about me having kids.

I was like, dude, I'm not doing that till I like thirty plus, Like, don't you stop talking.

About it, like having my first abortion until I'm thirty plus.

I was like, I'm having a kid in a very long time if I am. And then she was like, she was like, are you taking any like precautions to like make sure that doesn't happen. I was like no. I was like, there's like ways to get around.

I scrape it out.

I'll literally take a fucking square and rip it out and PLoP it in my mouth like a fucking cherry.

But and then this is going on Fox News two liberals eating aborted fetuses.

Speak for yourself. I'm not liberal.

I'm a new cancer.

I'm slaborl.

That's my new genre.

And there's a neo slaveryl.

But my mom was basically like being like, well, you know, just like if but if you do get pregnant, like maybe it's a sign that you should keep it. And I was like, maybe it's a sign that I shouldn't. If it happens by accident, you're getting a call.

Oh, gosh, I'm getting a crazy call right now. Hold on hello.

I got so excited I thought it was a crazy man.

Anyway, my mom was basically telling me I can't I can't get an abortion, and I was just like, you need to stop even speaking to me, because I'll get one faster than you know it.

I'll get one to prove a point.

Yeah, like I will. I will exercise my rights because they're always trying to be taken away from me.

Period. How are you feeling.

How am I feeling?

Yeah?

Pretty good? Like mentally mm hmm.

Yeah, I've been awesome honestly because I've just been like on like a steady, like stupid streak. When bad things happen, I instantly like put it way back in the in the like back back part of my brain. Yeah, I'm not kidding. I actually do think. Me and my therapist talk about this a lot. Sometimes avoidance is okay. Avoidance is okay if there is not a clear solution that you can get to, like almost immediately.

If the path ahead of you is clear, maybe you're on the wrong path.

My path is clear because I cannot envision anything.

Like people keep path people keep talking about like a year.

You said they're clearing the way.

They already cleared the way. Shake, shake it up, move, be a shaker and a mover.

You sound like somebody who's like just like is working for the call map.

Yeah.

I was gonna say that, but you, like you weren't even letting me speak. Every time I was saying something, you were like, shake.

Dude, how are you feeling awful?

I've been heavily considering relapsing, not joking.

Well, you know what's good is my life is so fucking good that like what you're saying goes in one year out the other, because I'm on a amazing streak. But what were you saying about being sad?

Oh? Just you know, like it's hard sometimes.

Oh you should just smile.

Just smile and keep laughing and making smiling way boys, smiling.

Way, Wait, are you actually sad?

Don't relapse?

Just I don't know what I am. I'm kind of just like ignoring all my emotions.

That's literally that's what I've been doing, and it's been working.

No, it works really well, just like bottling it up, never speaking about anything. Yesterday I did have like I blew like a gasket, which is like a scary sign because I like had like I was very angry yesterday. Don't know why, but I woke up just like in a bad mood and I haven't done that in a very long time. But like, also it was warranted because the night before there was a big spillage of laundry detergent in the boiler room. It like got all over

Though.

I it seems like there's something else.

No, it seems like that was just like the like.

You know, the see I'm pushing everything else, the analogy.

Where it's like, oh, you keep stubbing your toe and like we'll see like the final toastub and like the explosion to that, and they're like, what the fuck You're freaking out over nothing, But it's like.

You don't know that this person has been stubbing there. So every single day on.

That actually really like hit a chord with me just now, like that was an aha moment.

Mm hmm. You just but you just don't realize it because like when you're dealing with the problem in the face of it and it's easy to swallow it, you're like, Okay, that problem wasn't that. It swallow a big fat load, and sometimes the load is a lot, but like it just takes like a little double gulp. Like it's like like it's the big gulp.

Big gol.

There's no, there's the gulf, there's the big gulp, and then there's.

The double gulp, big gold.

I think there is something called a double gulp, Like that is the Yeah, that's that's the uber size. But yeah, you don't realize it because it's like, oh, it wasn't a big deal. But then like you keep doing that and then you're like, oh my god, I don't have any more space, and might.

Tell me to keep swallowing.

I'm gonna throw up what well I've been like swallowing your problem and come and come I'm both of those together.

It's like you fill up fast?

Should I literally just sleep on the podcast? I feel like that would be interesting for people.

You can't all keep talking. I can talk forever.

How are you doing, Kai, I'm doing good. Actually I've been happy for like three weeks straight.

Yeah, you know what I was doing, will say.

Stealing my happiness from me, young motherfucker bitch. I'm sad right now. See my emotions. It's funny. Aren't taken seriously? I'm just laughed at and scoffed at.

I take them seriously.

Well, I'm back in town, so it might make you happy. Maybe what you were missing was a little doesn't mean.

That's probably it.

Honestly, Well, I hope you feel better.

I actually have, Like now that you're talking about being sad, I really have been awesome, but that like that came out.

What I'm saying is like, what I'm saying.

Is like it's easy sometimes to be like, oh I've been like okay, but then like when you realize, oh okay, like my friends are actually like kind.

Of going through it right now, and I'm in like a decent space. Does that make sense?

Makes me feel good that everybody else is good but I'm bad.

Well, maybe you should do something about it and stop fucking whining.

No, that's literally my vibe. I'm just like sitting in it. It's kind of getting comfortable too.

That's why I'm saying you need a little dose of me so I can drag you around and make you like go outside.

And like that's the thing is I love staying inside like elden Ring. No, I don't even like half the time. I'm not even playing elden Ring like you can like playing Call of Duty. No, I'm not playing anything. I'm literally just like existing. I've been consuming a lot of like shows and movies and documentaries. I love documentaries. I love them.

What was the last one that you watched?

Are we any into media?

What time is it?

It's fifty one minutes in.

Fifty one fifty right now? Fifty one fifty right?

You are to be you want to?

Yes, I'm not gonna that costs money, sorry, special.

Drew fifty Literally that would be a very I'm begging for a title for this episode.

Drew gets fifty one.

I'm literally begging for Drew asked to be fifty one fifty kind and you say.

No, I was actually fifty one fifty, So this is like really offensive.

I was never fifty because I can control myself. Oh that was a joke.

That was a joke, a joke.

It was a joke.

Guys. It's like nowadays, like no one can take a fucking you can't say fucking anything without offending someone.

Drew pause is game to be here?

I pause my fucking game to be here.

I'm frazy getting fifty one fifty in the I pause my game.

To be here. But yeah, what are some of the documentaries you've been watching?

There is this documentarian that Josh showed me called I think it's el Elren Elron or Iran Morris and he do you know Hamilton Morris from Vice the drug? Yeah, documentarian. His dad was also a documentarian, So nepotism can't do

I love pet cemetery, like the idea of that.

It's really cute. And the one that they headset up was really fucking cute. It was like really posh. But yeah, I watched that one. And then I watched this documentary called Thin Blue Line, which is like the first like you know, like the modern style of crime documentary where it's like reenacting and shit, It's it's really fucking sick.

I'm literally gonna watch that today.

I'll watch it again with you.

Oh I wish.

The one at the docu series I watched wasn't so long because I would rewatch it with you.

But I literally just watched it.

Honestly, my like, if you're down to watch it, but I watched funny enough my documentait.

Wasn't there one more you watched? No?

Yeah, I just watched like a bunch of shit. Yeah, Like I started Succession, I finished the season, and I can't believe I haven't seen the show that I literally played the piano for. That's like fucking weird, right, Well.

That makes sense a lot of times artists like to like it's like not coold embarrasing.

Yah, It's like it's like I want to watch the show, but every time it starts, I hear myself it's like.

So yeah, and it's not it was when I did it. It was like the probably the fifty eight thousandth take, but it was like really down to the wire, and I just like, like, you know, like an art artists like their paintings are never finished, like my never finished. I just had to let go and give them what I gave them.

And I mean, you did the drums for the porn Hub.

Yeah, I did the drums for the porn how I did the piano.

But he did that by accident when he was like four, when you were four. Yeah, his dad it was it was it was out of a home video. His dad was recording him.

Yeah, and then you need to make a documentary about Drew. Yeah, he made all of the cool little intro sounds.

I mean, do you know, kay, what's the song that I played the saxophone for.

Oh, is that the one by like Galantis?

Yeah, something like that. Not recently, No, this is like ten years ago.

Let me figure out.

Yeah, it's the there's like trumpets in the background. And also let's not forget the HBO humming, like yeah, that was a huge that was my highest paint.

Yeah, no that I wan's still paying that shit.

I still every time you hear that play, I get a penny.

Yeah, not every penny. I've seen those checks. It's more than a penny. You're being humble.

Yeah, okay, it's more than a penny. I was gonna say, that's like not that much.

No, I mean think about HB like Euphoria, Like every time someone watched Euphoria, that sound doesn't play.

Yeah, it was right in the bean. Sorry, I am breaching my contract by singing it right now copyright strike.

But you watching that reminds me.

On the plane, I watched a docuseries called Nuclear Family, which was super fucking interesting. It was about this like lesbian couple who had a kid in like the eighties nineties. No, yeah, they had their kids in the eighties, and they were like amongst the first like gay couples to like go out and just like be like fuck it, like we

That Docky series did give me a lot to twinkle.

I think about bit sorry, I'm gonna fucking.

And the the like wife and it russo looks like friendly Woods, and I like every time they showed an old picture of her, I was like, I need Cucci to kneecap interaction between me and this.

Woman, like I fully like I see it, like.

I can top. That's such a crazy vibe contact.

This is how you have to ride out Kuci to kneecap. It's kouchi.

And then this emoje like the like fingers crossed emoji to kneecap because that's what I'm gonna do to the knee. It's like I'm like, I'm crossing my legs over that knee.

But yeah, that series was awesome.

And then I watched for the first time Nightmare on Elm Street and.

It was awesome. One the like licking phone, like the tongue phone.

They need that in real life so I could put that on my food chain when I'm having phone sex.

Two two.

It was fucking hilarious, honestly, like it's iconically funny. Yeah, it was so fucking funny. I started this thing that I didn't finish because I was watching it with my friend and he was like, oh, you shouldn't watch this if you haven't seen the movie, and I was like, okay, loser.

Of all time.

And I'm like, it's so crazy, but it is fucking awesome. Also saw The Batman and that was pretty lit. I really liked the car chase scene.

The car chase scene was literally the only redeeming thing for me. Really, I did not like that movie.

I liked it, and I usually don't like know that I care about like comic book based like movie like I don't care about like Marvel and like all that stuff, like it's not something that necessarily tickles my fancy. But I did like it, like, and I went into it but ligerently tired and I talked to Don about it and Don was like, dude, I was like kind of like falling asleep because I saw it late, and I was like, fuck, I'm seeing it late and.

I didn't know it was that long of a movie and I was so tired.

That was like my biggest qualms was how long. It was.

So feel long to me.

The dialogues were so sick though, I'm trying to go.

To that yeah something, Yeah, that was really cool. There were a bunch of cool things. I just for some reason I left that movie and I was just really like let down.

I also think Robert ate Batman.

No, no, both of them ate, and I want them to both eat me out. Zoe Kravitz and Robert Pattinson. They should have boned on screen and I should have saw them also.

Okay, Okay, that was like I guess I get it because it's like, but I think about all the old Batman movies and like I always think about how sexy poison Ivy was and I'm like, she literally made me.

Cross my legs.

Hella hard as a kid, So I'm like, this isn't serving like crossing my legs and like having to pee, this is serving Like yeah, like it was just not giving the sex appeal, especially like it's been so publicly like oh my.

God, like I want them too fuck.

And I was like, cool, like what Batman got a boner at the end of the movie when they like had that like little kiss, but like, who cares you have a boner in your fucking metal suit?

It probably hurts, Like that's like chastity belt. Yeah literally, like it's just it.

Wasn't giving Batman is sexually repressed. Yeah, that's a conversation that we're not having.

We need to see Batman get head.

Yeah, we needs to be drained.

Yeah, basin drain. He needs to listen to Blade, right, guys, that's what y'all mean.

No, that's not that's.

What I meant.

I mean, I can mean that if you wanted to.

But yeah, I just like left it just feeling I don't know. But the more I sat on it and like heard everybody else's opinions on it, I felt left out. So I was like, yeah, I really I started to like it, but like I really don't know why, it just did not click with me.

I liked it.

Also, this is a spoiler, like if you haven't seen it, but the pictures on the wall cracked me up, Like of the Riddler, like his two selfies like them being Polari and Sauce.

It cracked me up. And then him singing I couldn't I.

Like that but I was like that actually physically made me.

Cringe and that song, like why the song?

It was the most cringey thing ever. And I could tell Paul or is it Paul Dano? Yeah, I could tell that, like he was like, oh, they're like feeling themselves right now, and I like don't want to do this, and he just like because his entire performance I genuinely thought was like spectacular, and I could tell he was not into that. Like I could tell he was like, this is like weird.

I felt so weird. Yeah, too, feel the exact same way.

Yeah, I think it was also, Yeah, there was just a lot of little like there was qualms in the movie, like I still am not at the point where I can see social media like depicted in like cinema at all, Yeah, and not cringe. Like him being live, I'm like that kind of like is stupid because I'm like, if he's live, like technically they could just like pin where he's at, like he's literally public.

I guess yeah, No, that's the shit that like really pissed me off, like they would like I don't know, we could talk. I could literally we could go back and forth for hours about it because I Literally the more I think about it, the more I'm like, oh, like there are so many little things, but and him.

Having like the discord that's literally our discord.

I know, that is the Patreon discord, like building bomb, Like there were so many cringey things on the side. It was like it was.

Like someone get something.

It was like, get the assault rifle, get the snow camo helmet, like blah blah blah blah blah. And I'm like, y'all are literally like cringing me the fuck out, and you need to stop because you're feeling yourself too much.

Yeah, I know there were things like that where I was like, this is okay.

Like I guess ultimately I can say the reason why I didn't like it is because I went into it thinking I was gonna like watch like a very serious movie like The Joker or something, and like this was like a completely different.

Vibe where it was very comic.

Yeah it was. It was campy and comic bookie, and like I wish I had heard or saw Christian say it's like an anime noir like going into it, because had I gone into it with that mentality, I definitely would have.

Like, yeah, that's how I went into it and I was like, oh, that is a really depiction.

It's very cartoonish.

Yeah. I went into like with it, into like the movie with such like different expectations that but it's like the same with like albums that I listened to, like Playboy Cardi, for example, Like I expected like a bunch of Baby Voice because all the leaks were Baby Voice, and then I got like a whole lot of Red and I hated it the first listen through, and then now I like it. So maybe I just need to watch it again with different expectations and like it's just.

Such a long movie to commit to watch.

I'm never watching it again. It's like what it's like, I never watched Joker twice. I never watched I would just never watch it.

I want to rewatch Batman returns.

Also, I was gonna say something, Oh, at the end, they kind of like have you seen it?

Yeah, they kind of like teased the Joker.

And one thing I don't like about like the Batman universe like is that all the movies have different castings. So I was really confused because I was like, is that's supposed to be the Joker because it doesn't look like Jolkin Phoenix.

And then I was like, oh, well, these.

Movies, that's like usually how they play out, Like correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't think I've ever seen a Batman movie, and they were it's always like

There was someone's Finn was talking about it. It's like someone he knows, but maybe that's like not proformation what it is because it's in the movie. But yeah. And then a movie that I can and will watch once a week for the rest of my life is Dune. I literally love that movie. It was shocking how much I liked it, Like, like I never I never under a word. Yeah, I never understood Star Wars fans or Lord of the Ring fans or Harry Potter fans. I

It's so it's art directed, it's so yeah.

Yeah, the art direction is crazy. And also the soundtrack is fucking sick. Like I know, I ironically play the yelling song like at two thousand volume to like pierce our ears while we're writing. But like, I actually do like the soundtrack, but it's not like a Social Network or Gone Girl soundtrack, like we all know that you can't reprolic that.

Yeah, is it like Blade Runner soundtrack esque?

Yeah, it's like the same.

Like maybe I do watch it. I don't know, though, I just like I don't. I can't commit my time to it. Because I was saying yesterday to like Mason and Drew, I grew up in like a Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, Household, so I spent a lot

Yeah, I I love it, and I feel like it's like becoming that for me where I'm like, oh, this is like a comfort movie, Like I'm gonna like put this on and like go to sleep to it. But fuck, there was something I was gonna say, oh after watching that movie, after after watching that R D T scream, like that little guy little guy.

Him and him in the his lego scream.

Oh that's like wait, oh it's Mario. No. It was like my.

That's when you kill R two D two and Lego Star Wars. I would play a R two D two so I could jump off of things and hear that scream.

We should get that game.

Do we have we have it?

Yeah?

Play.

But Timothy shallow May let me try, let me speak my peace.

He watches our podcast, So this.

Is all that, this is, this is I used to look at Timothy Shallo May and see one of the scariest people I've ever seen, Like, actually, I never understood.

The publicly say about a friend, but keep going. But we're homies, Like this is like you've said this to him before and he's loud to his face.

But after Dune, I was like, huh, like he has it. I don't know what it is, but he has it and he's going to be a star. Maybe no, but I was like, oh, like I get it. I get like all of the hype. He deserves it. He's awesome. And maybe that's just me being a Dune fanboy.

I'm so excited to see him play Willy Wonka, Like I'm I'm genuinely excited to see plays Willy Wonka and then Charlie the Chocolate actor, and I'm he's the.

Most booked actor because he's a snack.

That ate.

Honestly, I'm jealous that I didn't think of that. Fuck you that ate because it was a snack.

Dam Wait what No, it's not.

I killed it.

Is Willy Wonka because he's a snack. He's a piece of candy.

True, What the fuck you're on fire?

He's a piece of cane, sweet boy, and he's a sweet boy.

Why are you just repeating what Drew saying?

Drew, did you want to fuck Oscar Isaac in that movie or what?

Yes, did you know? I can't publicly say this, but I'll keep that to myself.

When is really wont a movie coming out?

Oh, there was technical difficulties and now we're back with the rest of the media.

So we're gonna give you some songs and maybe I can talk about my obsession with Oscar Isaac real quick, Oscar Isaac and ex Machinos. Is the sexiest man I've ever seen in my entire life?

Is that it?

Yeah? I think he's mad him and you're jealous that I find another man attracted.

No, that has nothing to do with this. I just has nothing to do with the fact that I'm not getting as much attention for you right now.

Oh my god, you are such a free.

I just think that he's mid, You're mid. His penis is probably weird whatever, it's.

Actually really beautiful.

Yeah, girthy, big head penis, penis vagina buttle.

Anyways, I'm gonna go into my my audio. My audio media of the week is Your Home by Kuni Yuki Takashi, BBD Hindcord or how are the fuck you say That? By APHX Twin. I would die for you Still by Prients. Still such a good song, still gets me go. In the live version from Wait, I'll tell you right Now because I literally bought it his live performance.

Oh Stop at Capital at the Capitol Center in Landova nineteen eighty four.

That performance is so good someone called it annoying the other day, like I posted an edit, acute edit. I did like a vlog kind of edit on Patreon to that song, and somebody was like, I love the video, but this song is annoying, and I was like, you are lacking, You are lacking in flavors right now.

And then I think, I honestly think that's it for me. That's it for my media. Oh you go to because there's one more, but I have to find it.

I Am trying to Break your Heart by will Co. That goddamn song is a certified classic. It makes me feel things for myself that I don't typically feel. I love that song. Ladies and gentlemen, We are going to Space by Spiritualized is another, just like really really good classic. Love that song. And then Airhead by ag Cook. It's a pretty decent spread of Like those three songs back to back to back will give you a brain Aneurysm, but yeah and Heavy Rotation.

Kick the Tragedy by Drop nineteen's and Search for God by.

I don't know, starting over by LSD in the Search for God.

I might be butchering that they make sure they make sure because one of you, bitch is gonna yell at me those two songs. Yeah, it's starting over by LSD in the Search for God. Those two songs back to back will make me cry.

And you're playing this morning?

Uh no, this morning. I was playing a few things.

There was one song that was literally eighteen minutes long, saying the same word over and over again. Don't remember a lot of songs it was like and maybe it was like Jesus something, but it was literally repeating the same three words.

No, the two songs I just mentioned are pretty like like shoegayzy and like stretched out and then one of them is only like drum and kicks and like guitar and then it's like a monologue.

All right, that's it for this episode. Thank you for watching.

I'm gonna go get some shut eye.

No, you're gonna come and eat with me, baby boy.

I don't know if I should eat. I feel if they're gonna bomb if I do.

I feel that well, I'm gonna go have a date with Kai and that's it goes Bye,