Drew got a new job

So we're really late on this episode. I was onmosted to not do an episode this week. Welcome to the works, incroso late, so I'm stuck staying. I'm stuck staring at the car.

I don't like Wait one second, one second?

Can you shut up?

I'm taking an order. Damn one second. Hi, Welcome to McDonald's. What can I get for you? Big and greedy? You want a big mac and a tim peace nugget? Is it just for you or your family?

What is he doing? I thought you were in Texas?

Okay, Oh, you actually want to fight? You actually want to fight right now? Hold on, let me meet him. This bitch is a fucking bitch. She's meaning such a bitch. Brouh Oh you heard that. You heard that. I don't give a fuck if you heard that. Pull up, hell, pull up.

Don't fight. Don't fight, Please, don't fight, Please don't fight. Why are you there? Where are you? Oh?

My god?

Where it's he?

I think he went to fight the patron up? Dude?

What the.

Okay?

I just got my fucking ass beat. I hate this job, bitch, this fucking job.

Where did you get your ass beat by a ghost?

What the fuck just happened. Hello, are you frozen?

All right?

We're back. Damn I look big and strong right now. Yeah, I got a job at McDonald's. That's what I do when I come back to Texas.

Dude, I thought you went back to Texas to see your family. Why do you have a job. Why did you get like a job at a Donald's.

I need to subsidize my income when I'm here. I'm not really working, so I just am addicted to the grind, you know. I just like getting money. I like getting that bag, I like getting that bread.

Why are you? Oh are you packing warners right now? Honestly, I'm pretty impressed by like your multitasking skills. Like that's honestly pretty impressive.

Yeah. Well, in like three days i've been here, I actually worked up to manager, so I kind of make my own schedule and I can do whatever I want someone quick, really quick.

Do you think that, Like, do you think like your place on the internet gave you like more opportunity for that? Because I'm just sure why they would like promote you.

Yeah, and also, like everyone here is like addicted to meth so oha, and yeah, I was just like I told them I'm the leader and they were like, oh, you are the leader, and I just have that natural charisma, you know it, Like both of y'all know what I'm talking about.

Are you putting anyone on the schedule though? Because your kitchen looks like dead empty?

I got the tile floor everything. Uh yeah, no, I'm the only one here right now. Actually that's why it's like kind of active.

Well, how are you gonna do the podcast and like fulfill orders?

Wait? What can you hear me? Sorry one second second, I have to mute the mute the beeping because it actually if y'all don't know that, shit gets on my nerves. Bruh. It's like actually, so laugh.

Well if you mute it, then how are you gonna know that? Like things are what fuck are those beats? Actually? Like does anybody a McDonald's, Like no, Like, what are those beeps for?

Noise? Please? I think it's like probably Oh yeah. Also, yes, my skin is giving today. It's not grease. It's just I'm an actual glowy doey look like I love my.

Every time we do the podcast on Zoom, you have to say something about your skin, Like you have to make your own comment about the way you look.

Well, if I'm insecure about something and I attack it first, it gives me. Yeah, I control the narrative and I'm like, yeah, I see it before you. So it's like not me, you know what I'm saying.

Yeah, I'm always for getting jokes about my my huge stick. Oh sorry, sorry, were you going to say that? Sorry?

You're not doing anything. You're literally faking like you got business.

I'm tak Yeah.

OK.

Do people who work remote do that? Do you think like they'll be on the computer like, oh, I'm looking that up right now and they're just like faking it and not doing anything, or do you think they're actually working on the computer. Also, stop bringing your laptop to a cafe. That's my new take is I think laptops should be banned from cafes because why are you taking up a whole fucking day. Also, stop doing your zoom calls and cafes Like outside, I was outside of a

Yeah?

I went to my office.

Your office kind of just looks like right behind the counter.

Yeah it is. I mean maybe I love this work. I love this job. I love the line of duty. I am an essential worker. I give to the community and I feed everyone. So we're actually like in the southern United States, we actually have the most foot traffic of anything.

It's crazy because you're in Granberry, so there's what like thirty people there.

Yeah, it's it's a lot. All thirty of those people eat thirty six thousand times a day.

I was saying today on the way home because the McDonald by my house was fucking packed and it was literally twelve on the dot. I was like, damn, I can't believe some people make the cognitive decision to like eat McDonald's as one of their first meals of the day. And then I remembered I lived with d Drew, and that.

Is why are you wearing that wig?

It's not a wig? Sorry, I was fixing.

Actually a two pay. He just had to shave the top of it, so the rest of it is his.

Hair I got. I actually don't fucking call my hair a wig. Bit it's a two pay. I get that shit straight, Like like.

I'm not even fucking different wigs for girls. Two pays of for men other than your job, your house, Texas.

Ben, I worked at my dad's job for a little bit today. Luna is the sweetest baby ever. My mom has. My grandma has cancer. I explored the ocean a little bit. It's been pretty sure.

Okay, wait, because you can say something about your grandma, be like, those are just a few of the good things that have happened here.

No, my grandma's fine. She's lovely.

I love her.

She's a great woman. I went and saw her for the first time in a while, and yeah, she's great. She was happy to see the baby. You're really happy to see the baby. All of the people in the rehabilitation place when they see a child enter that building, like their instincts kick in and they all want to hold it and touch it and look at it and play with it and shit. So it's just really cute seeing like all the old elderly people like want to take care of a baby.

Yeah, it couldn't be me, though, I just like don't fall under that like weird like matriarchal, like yeah, slight thing, like I just thought true, Like I see a baby, and I'm like, I want to fucking hit it.

Yeah.

You know what I realized is the sexual revolution it actually didn't fail because they've always had prostitutes.

What do you think the first time someone got paid for sex was, dude, like.

The year like one hundred, Yeah, Adam and Eve paid.

Money. I feel like the next day they were like, all right, how do I learn this money?

Yeah?

Because but do you think by then people were like that horny and couldn't fuck Like there was literally nothing else going on. So I would assume for a long time people were just fucking for like, oh fuck it like your ugliest, like there's literally nothing to do.

I think women like are genuinely I actually believe this, are more like cunning than men, and they like understand quicker than men. Yeah, p per So they early on realized that like, oh I could make money off of this and fuck with the man brain. But that's really the only good thing when women have ever done is like sell their bodies. That's the only good thing they've ever done.

Oh my god, what the hell, dude? Like things we have good on their businesses, Like a lot of women have Etsy shops.

Pregnant.

A lot of people women get pregnant.

Yeah, as a woman, you either do only fans or you have an Etsy shop. You're one or the other.

No, there's some girls the two choices. I've seen a few girl bosses. What's the What is a boy boss? Is it just a boy or just a boss? We need to fix that? So true, we need to fix that.

Are you going to start implementing that changes. Are you just going to say there needs to be a change with no action?

Oh wow, call me call me a boy boss, call me a boy.

On a female sexuality? Do you know how prostitutes like didn't get pregnant in like medieval times and.

Shit, not enough sugar in the diet?

Okay, I have, like genuinely, I've genuinely been wondering, like how the fuck do you not get pregnant?

I okay being a prostitute because you.

Start wrestling with your homegirls playing in it, just start fucking mud wrestling.

Yeah, I feel like it might have just been harder to get pregnant back then. Like now we have just so much technology. But actually we haven't changed anything. I don't know, but that's a good segue because we've all seen it. We've all seen each other's partners asking how much they think about the Roman Empire blah blah blah blah blah. I'm one hundred percent positive. Ninety eight percent of the men are lying. However, I fall on that

Probably like every other day?

Yeah? Okay? And Andy, how much do you think Is that.

A real answer, though, or are you just saying that?

No? I honestly, my real answer is like once every every ten days. I think about it, yeah, because I think about like how the United States is like a collapsing empire, and I'm like, oh, what is it like to live in a collapsing empire? Like I wonder if they saw the signs, you know, like their currency was being inflated. I don't know.

Yeah, No, I'm on the same wave length. I think about it like once every hour probably.

Oh okay, wait is it good to think about it more?

Yeah?

For me?

Yeah, I mean I believe so. But I just sounds like once every like day is good and anything more than that is like really low. But what are you going to say in.

You I was gonna say it just sounds like I's trying to change his answer because he wants to know if it's going to make him seem smart.

Like no, no, But is it good to think about it?

I think yeah. I mean I even go as far as like every minute I'm thinking.

Okay, okay, because I do think about it every day. I think about it. At first, I said every ten days because I was like, literally think about the Roman Empire. But I feel like just thinking about empires in general, it's kind of like goes hand in hand. I'm constantly thinking about like power being passed down from generations.

You know, wait, is Roman Empire code word for your mom's kouchi? Because if that is the case, then yes, I am thinking about it all the time.

And if Kai is thinking about it every hour, that's kind of weird. Actually I'm not.

That's what I'm saying. He has an obsession. I just think about it like before I go to sleep, because I'm like, I wish I had.

Some that's actually really really interesting, kay, that you would think about your mom's bajaney at not like hour.

I'm not thinking about that.

Okay. Well, anyway, let's let's move on, So I prepared a quiz for NYA to see how much.

You have to give contacts. Like It's so annoying because, like I, from the beginning of the podcast have said that I have emotional intelligence, no academic intelligence, and then when I show that, people are like, damn, she is fucking stupid, and it's like, no, I'm not stupid. Sorry, my light keeps turning off because I'm literally in prison right now.

Hey, hey, don't let these evil people dim your light. Wow, don't let him. Huh, don't let him?

Okay did you make that up?

Or he's quite literally yes.

Yeah, Well, I don't know anything about the Roman Empire. I wish I remember exactly. Our conversation about it went. You're like, because I just didn't know what it was.

I was like, what, Like, yeah, I don't, I don't. I just know. Like I was like, I know a lot about it. I don't think about it like super super frequently frequently, but I do like have knowledge on it that I just retained from like school and just other fucking like video essays and shit. And then you were like, I literally know nothing about it, and like I asked you, like where the Roman Empire even was, and like you were like, I literally Greece, Yeah, and you said Greece, So I mean.

Girl, they were at Meconos and Caicos, that's where they had it.

Yeah, yeah, okay, they flew.

What's Drake's airline? Oh a Drake. They flew air Drake to the Miconos and the Roman Empire collapsing was like a group of home girls who went to Miami and one of them wasn't splitting the bill every night, so then they like broke apart as a friend group when they went back to where they were living. And that to me is like that would be the equivalent explanation of the Roman Empire collapsing.

Wake Kai, have you ever flown Drake airways?

No? Right, No, I flew when it was still called Backshots air.

No you haven't. I was just asking because me and Nya were just on it. That's how we got to Texas.

And yeah, so like everybody knows that once you have sex with Drake, like you've already signed an NDA and like you can't even say that.

So, yeah, he bought me a house.

Are you serious? But you guys are talking about it.

Well, he didn't say why he bought him a house. That's just our friend and he bought him a house. Why do you have to assume he did something like you, you're just nasty and you give up your body for no return.

Mmm, I got I got like tickets to a show.

They were gree he gives out.

No, Drake is actually evil, Like the more I think about it, he's actually a wicked, wicked person. Like I'm like, he's like a super villain and shit like Actually, but anyways, let's get into the Roman empire quiz. Okay, I'm going to give you multiple choice, and then you have to pick from the multiple choice. Okay, who founded Rome? Romulus ulysses As grant for Artemis?

Girl, None of those are real names.

Again, Romulus ulysses s grant for an Artemis?

Is it the second one?

No, it's Romulus.

Okay, who the fuck knows that?

Swear?

I fucking know that, bitch. I don't know.

Who is commonly regarded as the last though illegitimate Western Roman emperor Georgie and Augusta a more Socratico Octavia Cortes or Romulus Augustulus.

The last name is not a real name, Like, you can't tell me that last.

Name, Well, which one is it?

Bitch? I don't know a b.

Georgia and Augusta is a name I made up a more Socratico is like gay in Italian whatever, and then Octavia Cortes is AOC and the one you thought I made up, Ramia Alyss Augustalys is the real one.

Okay, that's not a real name. That's like not. They were just like making noises.

And every everyone's just making noises that if you think about it. Okay, which Roman emperor self adopted a title that means restorer of worlds? Barnabas Collins, YAO.

Mean no, bit's not Barnabas Ulian.

Or Yannis Antintakumpo.

I can't tell where, like the option starts.

And ends like, okay, Barnabas Collins a b YAO mean ce Erulian d Yannis Antintokumpo.

Bitch, I'm gonna say, see you're.

Right a celebrate all right. Yannis Antokumpo is a really good basketball player, Yao ming is a really good basketball player. And Barnabas Collins, I literally don't know who that is. My dad said to put it down, so I did. Which ancient Roman city was destroyed after the eruption of Mount Vesuvius.

Bitch, Pompeii, whatever the fuck, Like, don't play with me, don't get I gave them easy.

I gave him the easy one. Well, also, do you want me to go on my.

Little I only even know about Pompey because of that picture of the statuetor ass.

Up, so I look it up. I'm gonna bring that up and my ship, like that's fucked up.

I literally didn't know that. I didn't know that Pompeii was real. Like I thought that was like a mythical thing that someone made up, Like no, whatever the fuck, And then I saw the picture of the statue, and then I think I said it to you. This was also last year, mind you, I didn't know that she was real.

I have it written you can't see because of the green screen, but I have it written down, Pompeii if it happened to day and being because I'm about to go on a crazy Pompeii rant. But Pompey freaks me the fuck out because, like it was two thousand years ago,

Wait, if that's what they eat, then what do you use to have sex and stuff?

We do we can move on, but no, actually it was they would eat giraffe, Like they found giraffe meat and bones in Pompeii, where they're like not native, so they were like bringing giraffes over and feeding them to people in sea urchin, which like, isn't that crazy?

We did they have toilets and shit.

I couldn't figure out if they had toilets. I think they shit in buckets and then poured it into the middle of the street because they had like these canals like between sidewalks and then they had like bridges over them, and like they had bridges so people could cross the street without walking in like shitty like dysentery infected water and shit.

But bro, that is literally so fucking nasty to not have a toilet, Like I would be pissed. Yeah, Like if I woke up to mom and I was like in the middle of fucking France in like eighteen who knows what the fuck and it just smelt like shit.

And fucking doodoo, like all smelled like shit.

How did we not die?

Like what?

Like, how do you like die? From that?

Back TOI like age life expectancy was like twenty eight or something.

Yeah, dude, we were hella, Like I was an old man back then, Loki like like six and seven year olds were like rulers of kingdoms like it was. It was really insane back then. But this is also crazy. So you know, like the statues of the people that were like killed by the blast, like that were frozen by the ash. Like there is a literal picture of a dude frozen in time beating his meat because he wanted to like climax right before the That can't be real. Yeah,

Why don't you send it to me?

Okay, I literally will guy jerking.

Oh it is um two thousand year old masturbating pump.

Yeah that can't be real.

Okay, yeah, yeah, I.

Feel like it's he's desecrated enough.

Yeah, like he's two thousand years old. If I'm not, if my video footage of me beating off isn't like blasted by the time, yeah, that's his rose toy. Well, like they need to.

Start on the Bachelor. Instead of giving like actual roses, they need to start giving those roses.

Rose toy level three. That shit hurts, let me tell you. On a yep, but actually to ruin the vibe, he when he died, his muscles like were heated up and melted in a way that like made him like jerk and like move his body and contort his body into a position he wasn't in, so like he wasn't jerking off. It just looks like it.

But that would also be such a crazy response to a volcano explosion.

It starts beating me. It's like that one joke where it's like like my teacher said, like teacher be like, oh, the boat is fifteen feet long, me in the back of the class feet and starts like jerking off.

Yeah, but also there's impression of jerking off.

It was crazy. You're literally at work, Like, I can't believe you're doing that in the workplace.

Why you have to bring that shit up? I forgot I was at work, bro, Like you brought me back into the fucking groups of capitalism immediately.

Bro, like something you know so you don't get fired.

This shit is actually rough, this shit has actually.

Well, I can't believe that there's people.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, I have I have a few more Pompeii facts that I really have to say. I really have to say them. I swear to God, I swear to God. I swear, and then we'll get into the music shit. But the brothels in Pompeii were like fucking lit y'all like they were crazy. So basically yes, basically, oh wait, the guy jerking off was literally Kai, by the way, that's like how I imagine Kay would die

I love it, but you can only pick one position.

Yeah yeah, yeah, so you pick a position and then the girl would be waiting in there like ready to get back shots. Like it was crazy and shot crazy because.

Recently I was getting something like that printed for our house. So since there's a long hallway to you and Joss's room, so that our guests walking down to you and Josh's room could pick one and they usually give me money, and I'm like, just go in there and do it.

Is that why I kept that shit kept happening?

Yes, and you love it? I mean you were down, so.

Yeah I was down. I thought I was just getting natural play, but like no.

No, they were paying me to hit. But since you're like just open for the look, it's just like.

A difference for you. Well, now we can ensure the POMPEII if it happened today, meme. But yeah, then it made me start freaking out because all of the houses around us right now are made of like plastic and cardboard and like paper, and like it's going to be melted to the elements and everything that's on earth right now will be Kai has flies in his room. I hate moth so much.

Is not humid it's his pants?

Didn't we did? Rubbed it on something else? Continue he did?

Yeah?

Yeah. So our houses now are like made of like plastic and cardboard and are just going to melt to the elements and everything we live in now will never exist again.

Oh wow, what happens? What is?

Oh so I'm fucking boring, bruh. I talked for five here.

Talking about the Roman Empire and Pompeii.

How many times? Oh this is a good this is a good fact, and this is the last one, genuinely. How many times was Caesar stabbed twenty three, thirty one, twenty one or fifty seven, fifty seven?

I'm gonna say fifty seven because I'm assuming someone was pissed.

No, it was twenty three. But listen to this, you'll love this. Andy. The song IDEs of March is literally because it the saying IDEs of March was because Brute stabs Caesar twenty three times, and so the IDEs of March song that we really like is based off of etsu brute Caesar getting stabbed.

Wait, really, I thought it was Agua the Marx.

No, it's IDEs of March. I'm pretty sure unless I just like literally made all that.

Shut up, No, it's yeah, it's I want the mark.

Wait no, no, no.

Waters of March.

Oh damn yeah, never mind.

You know all this about some stuff that doesn't even apply to today's life. And that's why you're a fucking bump.

I trying to make history interesting to you.

You made history.

No, it's fucking boring. Like I literally just don't give a fuck, like it has nothing to do with me. It literally has nothing to do with me. Like what like if swear me knowing about the Roman Empire, bitch, if chit collapses, now we're all gonna be scared and confused anyway. So me knowing about the Roman Empire, what I'm gonna know where to hide?

Like?

What am I gonna learn?

No, No, it's just to pass the time.

If society collapse, I would just fucking kill myself. And that's what they should have done the second that fucking volcano erupted, Bitch, I would killed myself. Like what, you're gonna die anyway?

Crawling around on the floor. It's actually like hell scary.

There's something in the McDonald's walking around.

A rodent? Okay, what were you saying about music though?

Oh, I was just gonna say that it's crazy how like? So for me, I understand that, like music is a spectrum, especially on a consumer level. I haven't been feeling as good being in Miami, and I'm like, what's missing? What's missing? And it's because I don't have any gay people around me? So I don't have Drew around me. Yeah? Yeah, how fast you were like this?

You're like, bro, I'm literally straight, Bro, Like, what's funny is?

I thought about that joke before I got on here, and then I was like, I'm gonna stop because like, I make way too many gay jokes and it's not fucking funny. But I, oh, we have to insert the gay police. Fuck it, I'm gonna call the gay police. We got gay police cars in Miami right now, which is like, I don't know if I like that combination, Like why are you doing that?

No, it does feel a little off. It feels like police cars. No, they got puzzle pieces all over the police cars.

That was cracking up because while I was like taking the video of the cop car, another cop car passed right after. I was like, fuck, I wish I got the other cop car because I wanted to be like, Okay, so do I call gay police or normal police? Which one?

But most where are we going to say? I keep going, Oh, I was.

Just gonna say that I've been really scared of my TikTok timeline recently because I fucked up and there have been people who were like sponsoring their really bad music on TikTok and I keep saving it or sending it to friends because I think it's funny. But now all of my ads on TikTok are really bad music, like

You stink bitch, you fucking reek. Most heterosexual men, most heterosexual men are attracted to men that sense queen. Yeah, I know. It's like men just are like ooh, like I want a girl who I can sit with and drink a beer and watch the sports game with. I want like a girl who will go to the bar with me and like let me talk to girls and shit like, no, you want a man. You want to data man, and.

Men are like men are the most obsessed with like the way other men look.

Like.

Men are literally taught to look at other men and be like that's what you should be. And if you look at something long enough, you're gonna be like.

Like you get big and strong. Ye. No, men get big and strong only for other men to like hit on them. And literally I'm like, okay, you're attracted the minutes. Okay, excuse me?

Yeah, man, can you not hear.

It a little bit barely? Okay. So this is my take on stuff like this because I'm like it's like hoop dreams. Like I'm like glad that you have like a dream to like pursue something, and like I'm glad you're creating, and like I really am like like yes, like do your thing, but like don't shove it down my fucking throat like dead ass, like keep that shit to yourself, like that.

Would be the first time you've ever said that about something, are you. Oh, he's he's gonna come back. He's just clocking out of work. He'll come back.

I think him.

What I didn't even say anything.

I feel like that might have been too far because he hasn't come back. He looked really hurt. I'm just saying it looks really hurt.

That's not my fault, though. It's the things I say offend you, like just like ignor and keep it pushing. That's how should be, right.

Yeah, no, I think that's fair.

Oh no, I'm wrong. I'm wrong. Oh my god, ue your trackras on We can see your eye, you.

Can see you live? Yeah, well we're not live.

We're never alive.

Yeah.

Yeah we need to cut that.

For real, bro.

Yeah you looked cake the fuck up? Did I?

Actually?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Yeah?

Okay, okay, thank you guys. What is going on with this mouse? What going on?

But yeah, that's just been freaking me out because I'm like, damn, music really does tap into your brain chemistry and do does something to you. Because when I hear a sad song, it actually makes me sad, like vice versa happy songs take you happy, bah blah. We all know that. But hearing bad music makes me feel like I'm going to kill somebody. Like it literally feels like it's literally like

Yeah fuck, what was I gonna say? Damn it?

Oh my fuck?

Oh have you ever read my letterboxed movie review for that like movie about the girl in school but basically like I wrote like a review about this movie that was like so fucking bad, like you know me, like fangirls what it's called. It's actually about a girl who's a fan. But anyways, I like watched this movie like I watched bad movies all the time for fun, Like I literally love a bad movie as much as a

Like the creators of like horror movies need to get together with people who just make incredibly bad movies. But the people who make the worst movies are the people who are the most passionate about it. Like does that

On, honest and those I was gonna say it honestly feels like that might be why I like certain bad movies a lot, because like literally I say it all the time, and this isn't like a hot take and everyone knows this, but like you can like sense passion in projects, and like I really really like if someone's giving like a good, good, actual effort in something to create something like I will tune in and I will give it a fucking chance, and even if it's fucking terrible,

That's how I felt about the Barbie movie, Like it's just like I never saw it. I can feel your passion, but I just like, don't fuck with your vibe. That's my new saying is I can feel your passion, but I just don't fuck with your vibe.

Damn, did you really not see Barbie. True.

No, it's a personality trait for me. Now it's like I've never seen it.

I really wanted that to be my vibe because that's how I am with like like Harry Potter and stuff. I'm like, never seen it, never will my life, never seen it, never will.

Wait, you haven't seen Twilight?

No?

I wasn't allowed to watch it. My parents thought it was fucking brea. They were like, no, that's it's evil. They literally were like, no, that shit's evil. They're sex weird demons. No, so I wasn't allowed to watch Twilight.

Miss is Brewhia.

Miss Grandma is witchery brew.

Ha. Oh wow, this is crazy?

Are people still passing notes in school?

Like?

Are kids still passing notes on school and score? Do they just have their like iPhones?

Like they have.

Neuralink now they literally just like transcoated through like a neurallink in plant.

I guess also, like the fun in us passing notes in school was because we didn't have any technology. The fuck was that?

Nothing?

Oh?

Kai, what were you reaching for? Could you get that mouth off your wall or sticking out to where were we were reaching for?

It wasn't a sticky note it was. It was the mark where the moth was left on my wall. I like smash it against the wall and I'm just been looking at it.

What can you My bills have been affected because my lights keep going on and off.

The bills has literally been effected.

Why do you want me to reach over the camera, bro?

Because he wants to smell you. He's trying to smell you through the fucking screen because he's nasty.

Y'all make everything fucking weird.

Bro, you don't think it's weird that your friend reached his arm up and you went to go smell his pits.

I'm not even fucking there, Bro.

I think I got it.

You it ew dude. For some reason, this feels so like gross.

I remember those uh those tiktoks of like the hot guys on TikTok that would be in there in a car and they would like be gripping the head of the like the car. Do you know what I'm talking about?

Guy? This might be your TikTok?

I know because I've never seen.

There's always guys and I know you're talking about. Do you know what I'm talking about?

They're always on live too.

Yeah, they'd be like you know, like a white thing.

Okay, what's craziest y'all know about this, but I've never seen this.

It's the dilemma we were just talking about. Most heterosexual men are attracted to men.

You know what's crazy is that? Like I feel like TikTok's just been dick prints for like a year now, Like you know, isn't an annoying to just always go on TikTok. It's just only dick Prince.

It's crazy because mine is only pussy prince. It's only like girls like with huge camel does. It's so weird, Like.

Why it's sleep for me? Like getting that money and ship.

You just have the fourteen year old stock trader.

And fucking sneak o Aiden ross and stock trading. That's been my vibe lately.

Wow, that's weird?

Is that?

Just like your Texas Viber? You're gonna bring that vibe back to La.

It's just my like when I'm working at McDonald's vibe. I might open a franchise up out in LA though. Been thinking about it. I think I need to open one like in the big Bear Lake, like put a parking lot in there.

Yeah, yeah, it needs a parking lot. Yeah.

Yeah, it needs like a Walmart slash McDonald So it needs to be the Walmart with the McDonald's in it.

How often do you get in fights at the at the office every day?

I have to beat a bitch down every fucking day. I'll pull I'll pull anybody's hair like I don't give a fuck dog, I'll ripped that fucking tail off witch either.

It really seems like you work alone. I haven't seen any other employees.

I know.

It kind of seems like you just broke into a McDonald's and you're just hanging out.

I cut my fucking finger open cutting. I made a bunch of rice crispy treats the other day, and.

Last night it looks good.

You can see that, right, And last night I like was it was like ten thirty and I had just gotten Sonic corn dogs. If you know, you know those shit's cakey you eat?

You eat.

Like box? Yeah yeah, pussy. So if that's nasty, you're just a hater of women. Uh huh, No, I eat terribly. I know it's really bad. It's really actually a problem.

It just constantly shocks me. I was talking to someone the other day and I was like, if I didn't live with Drew Ridgen only do not think I would eat fast food. But living with you, it's just like, okay, I could have a real meal, or me and my friend can order McDonald's for the eighth time in a row.

I put you the fuck on to this lifestyle.

You think you put me on the McDonald's When I met Drew, I feel like I only saw you eat spherical foods for the first Like.

You did make fun of me for that.

It was just like a brown sphere, a red sphere with like yellow That was.

My healthy art. Oh yeah, that was you. You caught me in my healthy art.

Nacho cheese with hot cheetos dust classic, whatever the fuck?

That was literally classic? What was I saying? Though?

Oh?

I was eating? I made like literally three trays of rice Krispy Treats, and I like freaked it. I did like fruity pebbles in one, I did Rice Krispy Treats in another, and then I did Rece's puffs in another and it was like the res puffs were so fucking good.

Okay, I didn't say shit.

Oh, I did have a schizophrenic break Like a week ago. I texted any about it or called her about it.

I know, yeah, you called me and told me, and I was like, okay, cool, you should go see a psychiatrist.

I booked an appointment because of it.

You guys can't hear.

I need to go really bad too.

Sound because my roommate makes like Jersey Club music and it's just been like that kick the entire.

Time in the frat house Jersey Club remix and then.

Yeah, guys, I have twelve roommates by.

The way, guys in the trenches. But I was cutting the Rice Krispy treats last night. It was like the last night I was going to eat them because they were going to go bad. And I grabbed the knife and I put it down and it wasn't cutting through the receis pieces, and I was like, damn, these bitches got stale already. What the fuck? And so I pushed down on it harder and I realized I had the knife upside down and I was cutting through my fucking finger and I just cut through the tip of my finger.

That's embarrassing. You should get a bigger cut and then go for the other cut and then be like, oh, while you're at it this because if you go for stitches for just that, it's going to be really demasculating and like embarrassing, and you might as well just thug it out and get an infection, because I do.

I do need to sutra up my pee hole because it's just so big.

Because it's loose, because it just stick your finger in it.

I love sounding. I'm in the sounding Yeah, that's my vibe. You ever seen sounding videos?

We have no and I don't even want to talk about it.

Nasty the fork, right, that like aligns your frequencies.

No, that is sounding, but sounding is when they stick like a tube, like a glass tube or a metal rodet.

Yeah, that sounds like it would feel good.

That's fucking nasty. And that just makes me think about the fact that, like, I'm sorry, but I have an inherent belief that if you're somebody who's like getting two fucking freaking in the bedroom, bitch, you're a freak, Like you are weird as fuck to me, and not even on some slut shaming shit. I'm literally like can you like go into Joeanne's fabrics and find a different hobby? Like why is sex your hobby? Like that's just something humans do naturally, Like why are you making it like

I agree with that when people bust out the sex swing, I'm like, why just to have sex on a bed? Yeah, like conditions on a bed, you don't need a swing.

Yeah, It's it's a different thing for me though, Like I think y'all are two versions that don't get play and when I bring out like my sex toys and my fucking swing bed and my dragon egg laying dildough, y'all like want to have problems with it.

But like imagine Drew doing like circusile with a girl.

Yes, oh of course, yeah, of course.

Why do you Why do you even need to say that? Like we knew that.

I just I don't know. I feel like just to be clear in case anyone was wondering, what.

The fuck are you playing with?

Why would ANYBD be wondering it's a zip ti? Why would anybody Is that one of your toys. It's one of my fidgets.

Yeah.

Is it a sounding tool.

And you're putting it in your mouth?

Yeah? Okay. So I'm at that age now seventeen, about to be eighteen, where I can look back on my childhood and realized that it wasn't so bad. I was just an angsy teenager and I'm made it bad. And I remembered this thing that me and my family used to do, or specifically, me and my mom and my sisters and brothers would do with our friends. And we would go to like nearby ponds and go frog hunting, and I know, oh my god, he killed frogs? What

Would absolutely no one's.

Reaction literally everyone was like, wait, what the fuck he killed the frogs? No, I never have, never will. I love frogs more than anything on this fucking planet. But I went to We would go and get really big long neck nets. Oh what catch the Yeah, yeah, long neck style, big gulp, slurpy straw.

Girl, where are you going with this?

We would just catch the frogs and then bring them back and pay them in the floor of the shower for a day and just take pictures with them and play with them, and then we would bring them back to the pond and release them. But they were big fucking frogs, like literally like bullfrogs, Like when you held them by the top, their legs would go this low. They were like hello, yeah, And we would just like

Oh do you want to see something where I look really gorgeous too? For you?

Is it naked?

Oh?

You look like your dad. Bro, you look like you're literally old. You're not gonna hit no, thats a fucking lutely not like the hell no, Kay, guy is crying laughing.

This is when I woke up.

Bruh mhmm, wait, I took a I took a good picture too.

Yeah, would you hit though?

Right?

Jealous? Hold on, that's just what I've been looking like.

He got back home.

Oh that wasn't really fast commute get like damn. The next topic, how about that.

Our sex tape? So no, no, no, no, the one that we're gonna drop on OnlyFans.

We have to report it first, but you've been stingy.

You won't let me hit well, yeah, because I don't know. I just when I can't get it up. It's not because of you, you know, it's like a me thing.

Oh okay, did you guys are have sex? Sorry?

Yeah, we've had sex a few times, a.

Couple of times. How do you think we made our children?

All? Right? Of course?

Me and you were talking about the other day, like if it ever gets really really rough for us, like if we ever get like down tremendously fucking bad, our fallback plan is to literally just man up, woman up and do us on camera and release it on OnlyFans. And I guarant tea I guarantee it would make two million dollars, Like Curiosity carry the cat, No, curiosity killed the cat pushing it.

I don't know, Like, I don't know if we'd make.

That much over time. I really do think we could generate like a good amount of money, because like bruh, Like literally think about it, Like we a lot of people know our faces, and if people found out we did s, they would have to go fucking watch, Like you literally would have to like all of all of my friends, all of my family, Like literally everyone I know would buy that shit for five ninety nine, Like literally everyone would Like I don't know, but maybe two million is a reach though.

Yeah, because I mean you're getting like that, like you're getting a huge deal because you guys are it's like incest and you're gay and your friends.

Yeah, I was like, which one of you us as you don't do because Nah and me never me?

It's okay, sorry, it's hard for me.

It would never be me. Okay, It's like.

It's hard for me to keep up with like what the narrative is? Just change. It's so fluid every day with him.

I mean me and Drew are both straight. That's why we fuck, Like why would we fuck if we're not straight?

Okay? Yeah, totally.

Dude.

You pushed him to going back to work. I think he's back at work. He literally he needed to go get his mind off the things that I was back at work. Yeah, dude, that was crazy. Why is your commute to work, so quick.

Hold on, I'm getting in on and ship bro.

Yo, Yo, why are you back at work? I thought you just clocked out Wick.

I literally just need to get you off things. Okay, I'm actually gonna have a panic attack like that was crazy. I can't hear y'all anymore. Oh wait, why did.

I turn.

We're watching your music computer for the first time. Dude, your hair you have so much hair that was insane.

You do have like such insanely dense hair.

I have them on backwards the whole time.

I don't know if you feel this true, but I want to go back to La so bad.

I agree. Look, I want to actually miss I actually miss La.

I know, I miss home. That's my home, all right.

Well, oh guys, I wanted to show you guys something before we ended.

Is your penis.

I was in your house at three am. Let me see, Oh.

One, get out of my fucking house.

So a couple of days ago. But anyway, just why doesn't.

Matter If you ever enter my house again without my permission, I will call the cops.

Yeah, do it all the cops. I don't give a fuck what.

I'm gonna call the cops on you.

Oh up in the rainbow car.

Yeah, oh my god, wait Drew.

Yeah.

If you haven't watched The Sopranos, this might be a spoiler for you, but it's not really. But there was an episode with a sexy firefighter who looked exactly like the firefighter who was sexy from uh fire putting being put out, And I was like, damn, I should have had sex with him.

He was so send me the picture of him.

Yeah, the firefighter in the show was so sexy.

Like, yeah, send me a picture of him. Should I do some Drew side up corner? Oh yeah, hold on, let me cover up this fucking nasty shiny forehead. There, that's better.

Oh you look disgusting.

All right. So these are just like a few of them are just certified classics that need to be said. Women not knowing what to eat is a viscidual memory of when men suddenly showed up with whatever food they had managed to kill a lot of women going through shop flipping shoplifting phases. A lot of women are going through shoplifting phases, and this is inherently intertwined with their subconscious and the fact that they used to gather berries, nuts, and greens.

Do you think if I use that in court I would get away with it? Yeah, depending on what I stole?

Right, Yeah, you can't steal my heart anymore and you already have.

Though, why did that make her go away?

You don't. I don't even want to talk about it.

Bro Okay, Oh I hate when you guys do.

This girls spelled backwards as liar.

A liar a liar.

Uber eats prices make you want to dig in your butt and eat the same ship from last night. That's like one of my favorite Yeah, you sent that one to me. I'm pretty sure your butt. Some of y'all air pods looking like they were in y'all's ass is not your ears.

That's literally me.

I ate this.

Josie had my headphones in Japan.

And he was like, ew, we put it in the video too, or maybe we can all did so fucking nasty AirPods. I done eighth this garlic bread from Dollar Tree. Now my leg won't move. They should add a feature where we can fuck over Instagram. Yes, I'll do one more. I got a bunch.

They should make a close friends that's like OnlyFans, but like you can make your close friends pay to see you make good on Instagram.

That's actually a good idea, That's what I'm saying.

Why would I say if it was a bad idea.

I don't fucking know.

Bro, all right, we'll end on this one's more for you andya, and I forgot to send it to you here, I'll actually send it to you.

Oh my god, you want me to read it?

Or yeah?

People just walk into my room and sit on my bed like I don't be scorting there. I'm like, y'all can't sit on my bed with your outside clothes. If my bed isn't like hardened steal from common swirk, if you jump on my bed that she would crack like I into a million pieces.

Sho come everywhere, just fucking come everywhere.

What's crazy? Is like, no mine? Actually, that's like to explain.

Well, should we get into media? Yeah, you watch any movies?

No, but I did have my cousins watch talk to me. But they're fucking annoying, and they're all like that wasn't even scary. I'm like, yeah, bitch, because you're stuck on your iPhone and you're never gonna live a joyous life of being outside and being a normal teenager. So now what, your life is gonna stuck and you're not gonna have any clean water for your kids.

How about you enjoy things or you'll literally be like me when I was seventeen and just too cool.

I know, me upset that my family is full of haters just like me. I'm like, fuck you, bitch, but I did, Oh my god. Actually, at my sister's keen set, I got high because I didn't want to drink, so I like took an edible instead, and I took a little bit because I'm around all my family and they would scare me, and I would look at them and know that they were real people and freak the fuck out.

Wait, they got that? They got one, dude, Yes, that's a big suit in this if you were high, and it was corraging me.

It was freaking me out. I was like, Oh my god, there's literally a grown ass man who has to go back home to his family in that right now, and he's like being paid to dance on stilts. And my little cousins kept running around his feet and he kept pushing my cousins away from him because I was like, oh my god, this man's gonna crush my cousins and like kill them.

He probably loves that job too.

No, he was a good bitch. And then he had lasers on his fingers and was.

Like scanning, scanning, scanning.

Yeah, I didn't watch any movies.

I cried in the airport listening to jump style music. No, no, no, wait, what did I cry? What was it?

Oh?

Shooting Stars by the bag Raiders. And I was just looking at everyone's families and like people sleeping on each other's shoulders and just being stressed out together and like being happy together and like getting on the plane together. And it just made me so fucking happy. And like I had like a moment where I was just like wow, like life is beautiful, family is beautiful, Like but yeah, one.

Of the song.

Is I had the same vibe at take off for my flight coming here, Like I was looking out the window and I was like, god, dude, like the world is so beautiful. Humans are so funny. Why did we make so many lights? And I was like looking down and I was like, dude, it's so funny. Like there's so many people down there and they all have their lights on because it's dark and humans just can't see in the dark.

Like I know, we like we literally conquer everything, like the like human unconquerable human spirit, what is it? The undominable human spirit? Like, bitch, try to fucking play with us, Like we'll figure out a way, Like yeah, we might.

Be just to figure.

It out, yeah, straight up, straight up. But yeah, we might be destroying the world with global warming, but like we'll just get on rockets and fly to a new planet and leave everyone behind. The billionaires that created the global warming will just leave us all behind and go to a new planet and do the same thing.

That's really morbid.

Okay, Well I'll give you a few songs jump Aiden Music, Jump Style, TikTok m P three, Psychosis. I really like I kind of avoided saying this song for so long because it became like a TikTok song and it pissed me off. But uh, one eighty decibel underscore, one thirty apex twin the off of Cyro zero, and it pissed me off, but it is just really a great song.

And literally I've been using my little sister's vanity, like I haven't been wearing my glasses because you'll see like, oh, but you're called the dogs from her vanity.

Okay, wait, but why is this three queens? Why is this three queens getting together to maximize their joints? Lay, that's all emergency in their comments.

It's nice to call kaya queen because for sure it doesn't give queen.

Oh yeah, two queens and a peasant.

Oh yeah, two queens and adjuster.

Two queens and the janitor.

Yeah that's more accurate.

Okay, Well mine is just how to tell somebody bout Dorothy Ashby Goodbye the Sunday's Traction in the Rain by Dayvid Cross Me and Nothing Could Be Good by the Beaches.

What album is the Dorothy song on? Is it afro Harp?

It's off the one the white It's Dorothy's harp. It's like the one with the white background, and then just like the blue Harp.

I don't know if I've listened to that one.

It's the one that has by the time I get to Phoenix.

Oh, okay, okay, okay?

Oh?

Also yeah, yeah yeah. Also Oreo Milkshake by Young Leane. It is a great song. Ky. Do you have media and you watch porn?

I get to do my media. I don't watch porn anymore. Oh, I thought you'd change by Hotline TNT. Shout out Eric Rayhill. He's in that video. It's really funny. He's also in my video.

So that's it.

Oh, I get to do more than one.

Yeah, don't get carried away, bitch, Okay.

Greatest Hits by Jockstrap, Life is Perfected by CFCF and then for movies Fight Club, Wolf of Wall Street, Fucking Fight Club two, three, music, Watching.

Going and My Hair more often.

Yeah, you look like an anime character.

You look like when people are lighting candles and then their hair sits up far but they get it out before their whole head goes.

Since I have this photo and to something and we took this photo that I'm like kind of afraid of bringing up on the podcast because we both I don't know what was going on with the lighting, but we both look so bad.

Oh, I know what you're talking about. It's really gross and you have to insert it. It's so bad.

And I'm using that as them Instagram promo pick because it's.

It's it's literally it looks like Drew got hit by lightning.

No, you know what it is. It's for the first time that in real life. So I'm honestly glad.

Dude I saw that. I saw me. I was like, I literally just look like a toe.

You you know, you know the movie like the dude that made a bunch of movies like recreating entire franchises with their thumbs. It was like the thumb Wars.

That's what I look like.

That's what we look like.

Yes, and yeah, I'm embarrassed, becau I've been hitting this stupid fucking jewel. Oh my god, I freaked out because I thought I lost it and I was actually so sad about losing my red one jewel as MR from somebody who made fun of people who used vapes for five years and now loves having her jewel.

Yeah the mic isn't.

That?

Da da da da da da da lady?

Alright, work okay, bye da da da.

Da h

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