Welcome back to this episode of.
Emergency inter Cuomo Governor.
Cuomo somebody, somebody commented it was like, every single fucking time you say welcome back to this episode, it doesn't make sense because I've never been here. How are you welcoming?
Should we?
And I'm not gonna change it.
I'm not changing it?
And I need thirty more comments about that to boost an algorithm.
No, what was I gonna say? Darn it? Oh my god? Whatever he said?
Should we? Oh?
I was gonna say, should we introduce ourselves to every episode? Like I'm in, I'm drew, okay, But I don't know if we need to do that, because I mean, like.
That's pretty bigheaded of you. There are plenty of people who come on here and they're like, I have no idea who these fu are. That's what I'm saying is pretty like like dim Like I don't even know why. I think the first episode, I said like, let's say this because it sounded good in my brain, and I didn't think about the fact that I think we said like no, I think on the first episode we said we said like welcome to Emergency Intercom, but now we
say welcome to Emergency intercom. Welcome back to this episode, like welcome to Emergency Interacom. My name is enya U Mansor.
And I'm Drew Phillips. Andrew for sure, my.
Tits are huge. Actually I didn't even tell you this, but when I was a no, when I was in New York, I was shopping at this store and the lady who runs the brand of it was like a pop up she she said, she you weren't there, like why do you like introducted yourself, But basically she looked at my boobs and guessed my boob size, like because she's she kept being like, I used to make bras. I used to make bras, which showed in the clothing because I never Also.
Let me get your boob size?
Tryde are you?
Are you good? I'm trying now.
I choked on it. Oh my god, yeah, you say, can I try?
Can I guess your boob size? I'm growing up?
I like.
I took a sip and then I started laughing at my answer because I was gonna say like thirty six f or something. It's like like insane, But no, I don't know boob sizes, like are you like a C?
I wish I used to be a C.
So are you a B D? I'm a D cut you're seventy No, what the fuck?
I said thirty four D?
So yeah, because what that did you say? Thirty four? I bet them thirty six. I have a wider rib cage than people assume, but that's what she said. She looked at me and said thirty four D and I was like, that's insane for how close she was, because I've been standing in front of this woman for like three minutes and she hasn't like seen my boobs. And she was like, yeah, I'm a bra maker, like I
like really know boobs well. And then the brand I'm talking about is pretty The woman who runs that brand is literally one of the most interesting characters I've ever spoken to. I literally loved her. But it's a brand I've always seen bitches wear, and I'm like, I really want this shit, but I didn't think my boobs would look good in it, because you know how the old saying goes, nobody likes big tits when it comes to clothing, so I had like my doubts, but that clothing does
like big tits, and that's my story. But she looked at me and gets my boob size, and I was like, that's insane. And then she said the funniest thing, and she's like, and that's without squeezing or anything.
And I was like, that is that's without feeling those sandbags.
Shut this heavy little send bag.
And that's my story. And I've been on a shopping screen. I love buying clothes.
I'm still not over my like my throat is burning right now and it's in my it's in my nose, like I'm gonna have a sinus infection from that. So so I hope you guys are happy.
Would they be happy? You don't have anything else to say, bitch.
I was gonna say I watched or I'm like ninety five percent sure that I saw someone die in.
Front of me.
In my dream, I saw someone dying. It was really fucking gnarley.
Oh my god.
Wait, sorry, so sorry. I'm just like am remembering my whole dream and in my dream was fucked up.
Dude, I had a fucked up dream too. I have it all written down.
We're gonna get into this episode, but literally I texted the group chat right when it happened. But I was driving to go get some dinner and like I was parked at the light way the people like sell flowers, and I was going to buy some flowers. So I was like, Enya does it like she's teaching me something like this is like a really good thing to do for these people. So I was going to buy flowers, and then the fucking car at the intersection like like sped through like I'd like right in front of me,
Like I thought your car was gonna get hit. I was like, oh my fucking god, sped through there and like hit this other car in that that was like going to turn and like crash into the front of it, and like immediately it was like the loudest sound I've ever heard, like like screen you could hear screams from inside the car and my windows down so I could
hear them. And then like immediately just smoke rose and I was like I saw like all these like men like getting out of their cars and like running over there, and I was like, dude, I'm such a pussy because like I just stayed in my car and just like looked at like watched, and like.
Cop showed up whatever we were.
I was stuck at the light for like ten minutes, and like it was smoking, and I was like, do I like get out of here, like is it car gonna explode? And then an ambulance showed up and like carried this like woman out of the car and she was like covered in blood and she got put on a stretcher and I don't know if she was.
Dead or alive. So she follows me.
You're so fucking annoying. No, the the fucking thing not being like and that was really tragic that that would happen to somebody else who has nothing to do with me. You making it about yourself.
Yeah, yep, that follows me everywhere I go. I've seen so many people.
Die in Miami. There's this one street next to my house that I always was like, the jaywalking here is insane, but I never put two pieces together. It's like a five lane road, like two lanes and then a turning lane. But it is literally, I'm not kidding, that street goes a mile without any crosswalks. So that's why the jaywalking is so bad. But basically, my brother and dad saw someone who got hit by a car and her legs were broken.
Damn. My aunt got run over by a bus.
One Oh, I don't want to air my family out. But something happened like that that makes me seem like one of my family members hit someone. But no, sadly my oh one time, No, I don't. I don't want to say things that are gonna embarrass my family. One time my aunt sped into a pole. She's okay, but.
Me when I let the intrusive thoughts wain and they just like take over. Yeah, but my aunt got run over by a bus, and uh yeah, it was just like this family spectacle. She's fine though, and she likes she can walk.
Now it's family spectacle. But before I forget my stupid fucking dream, I was like in traffic and I had to get home really quick because something bad was happening at my family's house. So I was like trying to
rush to get like around this traffic. And I was in my yeah, and I was in my dad's big ass truck, and I just like kind of went off road to go around, and everyone was stopped in front of this car that had parked and there was a lady outside screaming, just like screaming, and I couldn't hear what she was saying. And everyone turned to me and was like no, like back up, like, do not come this way, And then I almost didn't listen to them to be rude, because I saw there was a space
I could speed pass. I was like, oh, whatever, wait, I.
Literally experienced what I experienced in real life in your dreamscape.
No, because what I say next is like really really really fucked up, like and so graphic. I like went into a gas station to cut through the gas station to get onto another road, and when my car was still facing this woman, I looked and she I think had like a bomb or something on her, and she fucking just exploded, and like, like my dream was so vivid that I watched like a human like literally explode and everyone around her like was like hit with shrapnels
of her bone. My god, I like was freaking out. And then I was like I don't even have time to process this because something bad, something else bad is happening in my family's house. So I had to rush home. And the bad thing happening in my family's house was this like stalker.
Why am I like trying to like can't stop visual?
Yeah, this person was trying to like break into my family's home. And when I got there, like the doors were unlocked, so I thought my family was murdered already, and it was a really big house and I had to run around the house trying to find my family, and I thought all of them were dead. And that was my dream last night. And then I woke up with a really dry throat.
Oh see, I've been waking up with a really dry throat recently.
It's because our fucking home gets to I'm not kidding sixty three degrees in the.
Middle of the night, yep. And also the mold.
No, it's not the mold, but I will say, you've scared me with the mold. And now I don't want to run the heater because I don't want to cook the line and.
It's gonna the spores are gonna be released, and like, oh, like it's time, Like let's go.
Why don't you get that mold testing kit that I sent you.
I'm going to I asked for it. I asked for it for Christmas from my mom.
But all right, I have to go into my notes because I have it written down, your dream, my dream dream. I just needed to get the people who were involved and just like a brief synopsis of like what was going on. Okay, So it was me you O Ryan in a fourth party that I can't remember who it
was for the life of me. And I even wrote that down in the notes because I was like, I don't know who the fuck was with us, but someone else was with us, but it was us for we were eating like brunch in New York, Like we were just like we were having a late brunch in New York and like we're just sitting there like shooting the shits, Like I remember, like the conversation we were having was like actually funny, and I was like, oh, like I want to write this down.
But I forgot it because I was like, actually funny shit, and I was like, why is my like sleeping brain actually hilarious too?
But then like all of a sudden, we hear like these like blood curdling screeches like from behind us, and were like the loudest screams like I've ever heard in my entire life, like screeches, and like we were all immediately like wait, what the fuck is going on? Like
let's go check it out. So like we all or walk around this like corner and like we see the people screaming and there's like this uh, like apartment building that was like being built that like had collapsed on onto like a couple of workers, and I was we were like, oh, like that's not that big of a deal, Like let's help these people get out. So we help these like construction workers get out. Everybody was fine, and
then we keep walking. The screams are like continuing, and like as we keep walking up the street, they get louder and louder and louder, and then like we like eventually hit this point where up the street, like a sinkhole had opened up underneath like this skyscraper and it had collapsed, and like.
All you could see were like dead bodies just.
Flung everywhere, like they were like you know, light poles like.
Like diagnosed us in the comments to be like it is not normal to have this vivid of like terrifying.
It was.
Fucked up, Like I was like it was like the plane crash like that I had like in like one of the first episodes, but it was like so vivid, Like I could see like the smoke in the air and like you could feel it in your lungs, and like the people that like they were like parts of the building that hadn't fully collapsed, like the stairwells hadn't fully collapsed, so they were like people like at the top of those like screaming like help me, help me,
My kids are down there, like literally like I could, like I retain like everybody's like conversation. There was like people like hanging from light poles and like craziest shit and just like like screens like deafening, deafening screams. And then I don't know how it ended. I don't remember at the top of my head. Oh but yeah, we like we were we were digging. We just were digging for bodies and.
Uh.
And then I remember like or at the end of it, like we went back to brunch and we just had a conversation. We were like this just like that just changed like the trajectory of our life forever, Like I can't believe. Yeah, but I still had our mimosas after digging up dead bodies.
I've actually never like once in my life had an alcoholic drink ad brunch, neither of I Like, I don't that sounds like I've gotten day drunk once. And then I was like I want to sleep by six, so like why why would I do that?
Day drunk is fun?
Though maybe if I had the chance to do it right now, Like I'm like right.
Now, like.
Right now, let's do it.
I've actually realized there are a lot of people who like like drink when filming their podcasts and like drink before and I'm.
Like, that's a little unhealthy.
That's not I imagine you had to drink to work.
I was like one of the earlier episodes, I was like, I like feel like if I just had like a shot before every podcast, like I would be like I would be good, Like I'd feel fine. I mean both of y'all were like, absolutely fucking not.
You said that again, like in front of me and another friend of ours, and we were both he was like no, like, no, you do not do that because I think you had had like an alcoholic drink and we were like being really funny and you were like, I should do this before we film. You're like, no, you don't need to.
Don't do all that. Don't do all that.
When I live alone, I am gonna no. But the thing is I always talk about this.
I like to enter my wine.
I like, no, not even wine, because the thing with wine is like I liked seeing like the like other twenty five year old girls and like doing their wine thing, or like the twenty four year old like girls doing their wine thing. But like wine tastes like fucking butt. Fucking you can't convince.
Me otherwise, like that truffle butter tastes like truffle butter. Butt fuck. That's a good joke. Come on, come on, man, give it to get it to come on.
Just like give it to me. Yeah, yeah, chill wine tastes like butt. But I was just gonna say, like being like someone who could make like pretty drinks, I always see them to talk like those pages of someone being like, let's make this drink and they make like a really pretty drink and I'm like, whoa, but I don't want the alcohol, do you know what? And alcohol is what makes all that shit taste like that. But that's why I got that, like non alcoholic sprits.
Sprints their bitter bitter bitter sp Literally, what elevates an alcoholic beverage to the next level for me every single time is if it's purple and if it has sparkles in it.
And they're talking about one specific.
Drink, no, that's hypnotic, but I'm talking about mixed drinks.
There's this there.
I've just seen it made a bunch of times where they put like mica powder. Oh you know, it's purple, and then they also add like lemon juice and then it turns blue.
I'm like, come on, I'm on chemistry.
Also in New York, that that one bar we want to All of those drinks are so pretty. I don't want to say the name of it because I enjoy going there.
You don't want to blow the spot up.
It's a really popular bar. It's not like I'm like, I don't want to give promo, but I just like I like to go there and get drunken, talk shit. And if one of you saw me there, I would actually probably tell you my business because I would be to drinks in and be like, oh yeah, but yeah, that place has like really pretty drinks. Like I love a bar that's like pretty drinks. I can't be a part of like dive bar culture.
Like dude, I've decided when I go back to Texas for Christmas.
That I will.
I've never I don't think I've ever been to like a dive bar before, Like legitimately, I've never been to one.
So when I go back to Texas.
I'm going to go to the bars in my hometown, which I've never been to, and I just want to observe, like.
Like I would love to go to watch, but I mean like to actually be, like, let's go out for drinks. This is where we're going, Like can it be? Me?
Like?
Could not be?
For some reason? It sounds like kind of fun.
It sounds fun with a group of friends when that's your intention. And if your intention is to have a key and to like be like sweet slim.
Now imagine saying that sentence to a fucking pilgrim if you're if you're trying to have a key of sweet sleigh, what the fuck does that mean?
I mean, I know what it means because I'm straight, but I don't know mean I'm straight.
Me when it's cold outside.
Burr.
Per burr, it's cold? Shut buried?
Why buried? Period? Shut? Also, more places need film photo booths, And that's my hot take, like because nothing you are, so listen to this nothing reeks of money grabber. Bars would make so much more money if they had a seven dollars film photo booth. Because once I get two drinks into me, I'm I'm swepting my card until I get.
The thing is, every time I've ever been out with Enya, Oriyan and Alisa and there has been a film photo booth at the place we've been to, I'm not kidding. Ninety six percent of the time we are there, they are in that fucking photo booth taking.
Photos and we are serving slang and.
Then I'm outside doing poppers.
Yeah, and that's your fault, you know, you're outside holding the paupers low. We're in there and I'm like, he come out and we're like service.
Yeah, they're like, please give me a hit one popper.
Please don't do that shit because it probably kills brain cells. There's just not enough research on it.
I saw a TikTok of this dude who did poppers in a.
Hot tub and it like burnt the fuck out of his face, and I was like never Also, no, I'm not going to get into that, but like it literally fucks with your heart.
But that's all I'll.
Say things like that, Like there's just so many things that are like new that there aren't enough research for. Like even as small as I vapes, like we still don't know.
What the fuck is little it's not even asked, that's like the biggest thing, Like I will one thousand percent have long issues when I'm older because of like how much I vaved from like sixteen to twenty three.
Like it literally will be a problem.
Yeah, And like I remember I looked it up because I was like, do poppers like fuck with your Like all I care about is my brain, Like if anything that's going into my body, I'm like, I just want to know if I'm about to be stupid as shit tomorrow, Like I just need to know. And I think it was like specifically heart issues.
That I know if you take poppers in like viagra, cialis like your chances of like going into cardiac arrest like skyrocket, which like no one fucking knows about. And like I'm sure there's a bunch of dudes out there who like have a rectile dysfunction that takes sialis and are given like poppers and it like fucks with their heart and they're like, wait, why am I literally about to die right now?
Well that's that's also a big issue with like a lot of substances, as people don't do the research and because there's no ed proper education on substances, which in my opinion, should be something you're top because like I guess like you're you're taught something as simple as like you're technically not supposed to mix alcohol with caffeine, But who the fuck listens to that? Because like if I can have a vodka tequila or I mean a tequila red bull or a vodka red Bull, I'm gonna do it.
I'm gonna put that I have it.
But yeah, they need to like teach that kind of ship because it's all about what's the term. It's like it's arm reduction, Yeah, harm reduction, not like fucking being like just don't do it because.
That's gonna make me do it. More like I was told that mine.
I was told not to do a lot of things and I did them because I was told not to and I loved.
It not do a lot of things and I didn't do a lot of things. I just I say this all the time. I genuinely am someone who I just don't have a natural in substance in general, Like I just am not like I like pretty like alcoholic drinks, but like literally because I have like monkey brain and like when I see a pretty drink, that's the only time I'm ever like I need a drink. Is if I'm at a restaurant and I see a waiter walk by with a pretty drink and I'm like, you do do that?
I've never like put that together, but literally that's the only time. Like when we were out to dinner, you like saw someone else order a margarita and you were like, you know what, I'm gonna get one.
Yeah, And then I saw it get brought to the table and I was.
Like, oh, wait a damn it.
That looks beautiful and I know what it tastes like. And that's the only time I care about it. But yeah, monkey brain, Like I'm sure if like more substances looked pretty in my face, I'd be like, yeah, yeah, it's like I want it and I want to picture with it. Yeah. Yes.
I think I just have like a terrible view on I don't know if it's a bad view, but I just literally like I'm like, okay, like why is it here?
Why am I not supposed to do it?
Like if it I don't know how to explain it, but like, like.
Why would I not want to alter my brain chemistry for a little bit?
Like if if I like, am I kind of guaranteed like to come out of it like.
Fine, Like why not?
You know, I think because most people have addictive personalities and you're not just walking away from it.
That's what I'm saying, Like I have an addictive personalit.
Yeah, I guess I also like dude, I know, like I just know, I know, I know I could not. I can't do anything want to be like that was okay. I can never do that again, especially if it tastes good, Like if.
It tastes good, it makes me feel good.
Because I am so like addictive to things that like I am very obviously like I like certain drinks and like whether that be like a latte from a spot, Like I'm like, oh I had that that day, and I had such a good day, I'm going to keep doing it. So imagine it was a substance that was literally making me feel like I was having the best time of my life. I'd be like, well, I know I had the best time of my life, so I'm gonna do it again, like I'm gonna get in. But in general, I'm pretty.
Lucky, Like I don't have an affinity.
Have an affinity for it at all, Like I could be like drunk as fuck and like think about it and be like if it's around, if something's around, and be like maybe I would do that. But even when I'm like belliterately drunk, I'm like, oh no, I don't.
The only thing that stops me of the time is like the we're being so vague like like about like substance in general, like someone's gonna assume they're like.
When I'm saying substance, I mean like literally something I feel like, especially in your twenties, and like I feel like coke has kind of made a comeback.
Like I literally never ever touched out in my life.
Yeah, I just like, like that's when I'm saying other substances. The substances I do consume are like weed and alcohol and even those like as we've said a lot of times, like it's not on like a grand scale, especially for someone our age range. We're definitely like on the lower end of use. Drew literally never does anything, and like I like I said, monkey bearing, I'm like, oh, that's gonna taste good, like I want to now.
I never do anything now, but I did do a lot.
Of things and I've never done anything period.
And there was a moment in my life where those things to control of me. And I don't want to get into it because it's really personal for me. But all I just want to say is just be careful. Please, just be careful.
That I didn't even get here.
I don't.
Oh, I think I was talking about pretty drinks, pretty drinks to addiction. Yeah, so basically, yeah, we're We're just two people who also do struggle with addiction. And I think I keep that in mind and that's why I don't. Oh, we got here because we were we made a joke about poppers and then we started.
Talking about how like they're kind of dangerous.
Yeah, everything is every what's the other fucking term that it's like it's.
Good in moderation or bad in moderation.
Everything is good in moderation, but also not everything because of like I don't know that I can say, like meth is good in moderation.
Doctors.
It's literally doctors when they give.
Adderall doctors in nineteen fifty, like literally they were just like good. Yeah, like they I've seen photos of like bottles of like opium, cocaine, acetam innefit or some shit like in a cough drop or a cough syrup and like y'all were just taking that. Like and also they used to put opium in tampons. We need to bring that back for me.
You are you gonna put in your butt.
Exactly at my asshole? I would put a tamp a fucking opium tampon on my asshole.
Are you kidding me? Dude?
It's like cotton. Do you know how difficult that would be to like get up there? It would like it would be like.
You know, with the fucking dookie shooter, the little plastic shooter, you just like like pop it up there. Do you know exactly what I'm talking about?
No, with the doukie shooter, like you mean the tampon applicator.
That it's for the butt part, right, Okay, let's move on. Something that I realized over the last like two weeks was that I love being alone.
But it's such an exaggeration saying two weeks. It was a week.
It was a long time. It was.
It was like, I mean, when you're alone, time drags on like it was it was like twelve days though.
Yeah, but I loved every second of it. I made zero efforts to reach out to people to hang out, which like is kind of unhealthy and mean of me as a friend, but also it was it was also kind of scary because I was, like, dude, when I live alone, I told any of this, like when we move out, I was like, I am genuinely like my my biggest concern is like me like reclusing away and not in like an almost like in an unhealthy way, like more of like like just like pulling back from every person in my life.
And I literally did that for like twelve days.
Well, but it's really different because I think about like last summer. Granted it was like during like COVID, but our like close friend group was still seeing each other, Like I was still seeing Oriyan and like Alisa, like I still like had like those people to see. But when you and Josh were gone, and I spent like a lot of last summer alone, and that was like you went to Texas for like two weeks at a time sometimes and I would straight up to be alone, bitch.
I did not reach out to fucking anyone. I stayed home. But I think it's easier to do that when you live with roommates because you rarely get that time alone, so you want to like almost just like rest in that. And I feel like when you like orian's like a pretty good example. When she lived alone, she was like way more likely to like leave the house and like go find people to hang out with because it I feel like it gets kind of boring pretty fast.
Yeah.
No, I.
Did not see another human being face to face for seven days. Like I did not interact with another person like in person for seven days. And that's including like like just like strangers like going like I don't think I left the house, but once I left the house once, which.
Is what did you postmans all your meals?
Yeah, yeah it was. It was not It was not cool. It wasn't chill. See now, the first time I spoke to someone was the girl Airwon got shared air.
One My time alone slaves because then I'm like I'm bored. I'm gonna go ride my bike and like do all these like healthy things and like cook all my food and like ride my bike to like Airwan and like get my groceries.
I did.
I will say I got so much work done, Like like I recorded two videos, I recorded two brand deals. I edited those two videos, and then I finished this other project that I'm working on, like literally just completely like isolated and worked a bunch.
For that reason, I'm also so excited to live alone because I have a hard time doing shit in the house when we like when you and Josh are here, because I'm like way more tempted to go and like talk and shoot shit with y'all instead of like staying my ass in my room and getting my work done. And yeah, when I was like alone, I usually got oh yeah, the last time you left and I was alone, that's when I like uploaded my two YouTube videos and edited like three videos in a row because I was
just like alone and had nothing to do. Yeah.
Yeah.
Also, I just like realized, like I fully am like a homebody, like I could like Christian. I told Christian I didn't leave the house for a week, and he was like, it's like that guy who like got sick and stayed in bed, and then he really liked the feeling of being in bed, so he stayed in bed for the rest of his life. I don't know his fucking name, but he like mentioned the name, and I was like, no, I literally am that person, Like I like the way I felt that home, Like I'm gonna stay.
Here for the rest of my life.
I love socializing, love love, love it. But I will say I want to be alone for a few days, so fucking bad. But I know I can't get that because I have to like leave back to Miami soon and there's no such thing as alone time when I'm around my family or in Miami, and we have like work to do here, so I don't get to be alone, and I like need it, so fucking bad.
Go get a hotel room this weekend.
No. I thought about doing that, but then I was like, no, I don't want to, like one, spend that money and then two like I have to do things. But I guess maybe I could do it because I have to like edit and be alone. I'll figure it out. My life is a sleigh and I'll figure it out. Yeah. Speaking of traveling, though, I wanted to touch on the fact that people do not know how to act in airports. Once humans entern airport, I'm genuinely so sure their brain turns off.
Yeah, all rules go out the door.
Yeah, like all common sense fully goes out the window. Like, of course, I'm very aware that a lot of people who are entering the airport it might be their first time traveling, so maybe it's also like a defect as like kind of a VET in traveling, where like I know what to do, Like I get there an hour before my flight departs, I throw my bag on the fucking tray because I check it in, drop my bag off, go through TSA. Why the fuck are you wearing like eight layers to go through TSA?
Like, yeah, why are And oh dude, the people who wear no socks like they wear sandals, they are bear feet. I'm like, girl, you have foot fungus. Now, I'm sorry, Like it literally irks the fuck.
Out of me. And I'm like, you're ruining it for me as well.
Like you I have to put my feet on that time, Oh yeah, you got foot fungers.
And also just like people take so long to get their shit out of their bag, I'm.
Like, also, one thing that pisses me off that people do.
It's like the same like idea of like putting your shopping crate, uh or like putting like cleaning up after yourself at a restaurant. Like something that people do at the fucking airport is they leave their goddamn trays on the TSA machine. And I'm like, why is it so fucking hard for you to pick up your tray and just put it where it's supposed to go. It's literally like three feet Also.
The system is set up to be done like that. Why are you fucking it up? My shit is coming out of the X ray machine and like all of it's.
Starting to.
Like like peaky, yeah, like peaking, and I have to sit there and slam all the train.
My jacket's getting hooked in the fucking roller bars and I have to like pull it up because it's and it's ripping in the fucking shreds because y'all are getting dressed literally at the whatever way.
I will say, I am someone who throws my shoes on there, but like my system is flawless, Like I'm sorry, Like no one has ever looked at me at the airport. I've been like, this bitch is taking too long because you would like I went to JFK the other day and it was the most packed I've ever seen it. Once one I like slay the day away because I just paid fifteen extra dollars to go through the like
speedy thing. So that was a syrup. And even as long as the line was, it took me like five minutes to get through TSA because I'm a fucking genius. I know what I'm doing. Get the fuck out of my way. There needs to be like like a first timers TSA, so like y'all can go there and like experience the like and like figure it out, and like I can hurry the fuck up because I want to go to Starbucks before my flight, and like I have all of this timed out perfectly.
And also people like lying up for the fucking plane.
You paid for your seat, you will, you.
Will get on, you will get on there, you will.
No one's gonna take your seat, like people love to like fucking bum rush the lines to boarding, And I'm like, you're making this annoying because now we're all just gonna have to stand on the.
Tarmac or on the That's where omicron virus was born, was literally in the fucking airplane hordes before getting on the airplane.
Yeah, I don't get why people do that. And then Drew was like, it's because people don't want to check their bag. But I'm like, ye, who fucking cares, Like are you getting off the plane and.
Then right into you experienced it firsthand.
But that would have that like that's different though, because I fully, I fully check my back every time, but also like that's a rare occurrence that it takes your bag that long to get off of the carousel. Most of the time it takes you like five minutes to get your bag, like five to fifteen minutes. And think about this, maybe don't pack like a psychopath when you only have a carry on.
I was just thinking last night and I wrote it down, is why am I not seasonally depressed yet?
Like what's going on?
Do you feel good?
Or yeah?
I feel fucking awesome. I feel like the best I've felt in a very long time.
But like.
Why something has coming?
That's also something I realized is something is coming, Like I don't know what is coming, but something big is about to happen, not with me, with the world, something big.
Every influencer who got a manager and immediately starts talking like.
That big things coming.
No, I mean like like devastating, like something is coming.
It's not over yet.
Well no, I'm saying COVID two point zero like something on that scale. No, no, no, on that scale, like something is coming, like reality shifting, like something is happening, and mark my words, mark my fucking words.
You're fucking pissing me off because you're doing the same thing you do when you're like an earthquake is bound to happen, you're just.
Saying shit, Also, an earthquake is gonna happen.
Fifty fifty, So there's a fifty percent chance that you're like right, But it's not even being right because it's like me saying, like, trust me on this, trust me.
You hate to see a pretty girl win.
You hate to say you hate to see me confident in myself.
You know there's something.
Inside You're not.
Even being confident in yourself. You're like projecting devastation onto the world because you want sadness for you do that.
Doude. Oh my fucking god.
When I was like the most depressed I've ever been in like twenty twenty, I was, I was like constantly saying like, like right before that, I was like I am craving chaos, like I need like chaos in my life, Like it's too like chilling.
I was like, Oh, you're fucking bad now. Look you're projecting it again.
Yeah, I'm just saying something something big is about to happen.
No, something amazing is going to happen. And that's the year twenty twenty two.
I literally read it. Something is coming.
Wait, I want to read my dude, my fucking notes app ship that I was like, I have to say this on the podcast is like, actually.
Dumb, something is coming.
I said. Tap water tastes really good, especially from New York.
Welcome, No no Club.
Tapwater from New York and Miami tastes so much better than la I switched to water tastes.
Like fucking bottle is exactly that tastes.
Actually, it doesn't even taste like balls. It tastes like borderline nothingness in like a very like scary way. Like it tastes like it tastes like I know there's something bad in here, but.
I just kept taste like fucking roach legs in And then New York.
Tap water tastes like nickel and dimes, and that's my favorite taste of water.
So white people, after it rains, I'm on the sorry look because y'all, I know y'all taste good.
Bottled water for restaurants is a scam because they literally be making the food with tap water. Anyway, Like, why am I gonna pay at like a pasta restaurant? Why am I gonna pay, Like.
Just serve me the pasta water?
Why am I pay for bottled water? Mich you cooked my food in the tap water, so I'm paying the same price, Like why why are you like trying to sell me bottled water?
I just don't like I have so much money, I don't even care.
I hate. I can't stay when fucking waiters like still are or sparkling. You're not fucking slip tap.
Give me the tap tap water, run me the tapwater. But no, I switched up recently. I literally like in my last video, I said it. I was like, after our conversation with missus girl, I was like, wait, maybe there are heavy metals in the Los Angeles tap water, Emma, and she I was like, maybe there are heavy metals in the tap water. And I was like, I'm gonna stop drinking tapwater. But I have been consumpated since I stopped drinking tapwater, so I'm going back.
I just like I like the taste of like whatever the fuck they be putting in filters, like a fresh filter taste, especially when you're supposed to rinse it and you don't rinse it. Whatever the fuck that is. I like it, Like they're like, oh, make sure you rinse your brit of ribbon and arson. Also, this one's like just really sad. But I'll say the one that's not that Before I said, I don't understand inflation, but I remember when bags of chips went from twenty five cents
to fifty cents and now they're like a dollar. What the fuck damn? Like, is that not insane?
Because and the serving is getting smaller.
It's smaller, yeah, and also curious. Really sometimes we like, look so dumb, he's just serving. It is getting smaller and the price is going up.
What is going on, Joe Biden, Joe Biden, figure this out, motherfucker.
I'm not kidding.
Somebody will ring your fucking neck if you won't figure these gas prices. If you I was gonna say, I'm gonna ring his neck, but that would be like killing him because like I think if you like poked him in the chest, his heart would sup.
No, He's literally made of paper, Like I swear to god, Joe Biden has made a fucking paper. Like I'm not I actually believe.
That with my if you blue on him, his body would like go like this onto the floor.
The skinny bitches will slip under your door, like he will sneak into our house under our doors.
But yeah, I guess is so expensive, which is like not the craziest thing.
Like I filled up and it was six six six six. Now that's a dangerous number to be playing with.
We literally looked up four six this that it was a healing number. And this motherfucker wants Like the amount of sympathy and empathy you want is like unmad.
I said it in the fucking last episode.
It literally is probably because I didn't get enough attention as a child, which honestly is not true.
Like my I think my parents gave.
Me no you literally could be just something they didn't so you don't remember. I know, I bet we actors.
Like I got a new baseball bad every like season, Like I think that's I got a hug from my dad once every year, Dude, I got.
So much love I got. Yeah, I got like physical affection, like I like my dad was like a big like acts of service and like gifts person so like he to like like when I'm back home, I wake up and my Dad's immediately like do you want a coffee? Do you want food? Like I'm gonna cook for you, like blah blah blah blah like and that's always how he was as a kid, like to us when we were kids, and he was very like affectionate and like would hold us and like hug us and kiss us
on the head and like do the whole thing. So that's why I expect way too much from people in my life now.
And I'm like, where are my hug at?
I'm like, where are my gifts? Bitch? And people think that's like like me being like a greedy person, but I'm like no, because I could buy myself whatever the fuck I want. I want you to be at Walgreens and see something stupid and be like, oh and yeah for you, So why the fuck aren't you buying me something?
But because I'm I am getting I'm literally inside all day.
I am getting to the point where I'm like, I want expensive gifts from people. I'm saying, I'm like why, like why can't I get that? Like I think I deserve it?
Like fuck, what was like I was going to say something, Oh, this is a I don't even think this is a crazy take, but like the hyper sexualization of like Kai immediately of just like small human things like like hold my hand.
Why is this sexualized?
Like, well, because people aren't taught to like give physical affection, and then that's why they get into relationships and have a hard time.
They hold their hands for the first time and they feel it in their wiener tip.
Well, I feel like that's like a normal thing for like kids, but like there is like a big there's a big lacking of.
I should be able to physical I was about to say, I should be able to hold Kai's hand in public and like it not be like oh, well, I think.
That's probably why every one also like sorry, I cut you off.
It should not just be like, oh, like are they gay? Like why are they holding hands? Like it should just be able to be like, oh, they're like homies.
That is what I think when I see that, I'm like, we are they being fucking gay? Right now? You're twisting my race.
I know I'm gonna make you limp wristed.
Oh fucking god.
But yeah, well I guess that's I was gonna say. That's also why everyone like thinks everyone in our group is fucking But also all we do is talk about having sex with each other, like everyone in our group and like I think that's so funny. Like the basis of humor for our friend group is sex joke, fart joke, and those are just like really easy to be, Like go into the group chat when you have nothing to say and be like, so, who's gonna have sex with
me right now? Like if you looked up sex in our phones, I'm sure the only text they are from.
Out of nowhere, like three days ago, is like, so when are you gonna let me hit?
And like Mason does the same thing, and I like do it.
Back to them because it's like hilarious, it's fucking funny.
But yeah, we are like a big group of like platonic like physical affection people because it should be normalized because then, I think I've said this before on the podcast. You have to normalize physical affection and like not intimate connections, but like yeah, because like emotional connections are very intimate.
You have to normalize that in your platonic relationships so that you don't go seeking it in romantic relationships out of necessity or want, and then that skews the whole reason why you're in that relationship, because relationships are about partnership, not just about physical and intimate touch.
Yeah, brave of us to assume they have friends.
If you don't have friends, you're probably like fifteen, and you shouldn't have fucking friends. You're like, you have no idea who you are. No, I'm talking about myself though.
Oh this is a good one.
Um.
So I have an idea to scam anti vaxxers. Okay, So I'm gonna like say that I invented this device that sucks out the vaccine out of your blood so like and literally all it is is like one of the those like electric sticks that like you know what I'm talking about, like that they use on the face. And shit, I'm gonna say that it's sucking out the vaccine particles so they can claim that they're pure blood again.
And I'm gonna that.
Actually would be so good because you know, all you need for that infographic to work on them is a really poorly rendered three D like video of like a vaccine like like like going through a bloodstream and like going into.
The electricity or the plasma provided by the ray the vibration exactly just like really and honestly, I'm kind of genius for that, and I think I'm gonna do you think.
Every single thing that comes out of your mouth.
Is like genius.
I mean, y'all tell me you you guys be the fucking judge.
Am I smart for wanting to.
See you to like the people who you just said you probably don't have friends and now you're like and you tell me. Also, someone told me that I like talk way too fucking much on the podcast, and it literally made me so upset. That's a big insecurity of mine is that I feel like in my friendships or just in general, I'm always talking way more than the person next to me.
I've literally never once felt that. But something that I have felt is that they need to drop.
No.
I can't even say this because it's so fucking stupid. It's literally no, it's stupid.
I won't give you silence. I won't give you silence. D I'll laugh.
I'm insecure. No, I'm insecure.
Just smile it off. Also, this was like the really fun.
When are they dropping penis too? There?
I said it, free the penis. I said that in one episode, free the penis. Okay, why can't we free the nipple? But we can't free the penis because.
Dick's are fucking ugly like every every person who or at least.
I'm a big supporter of free the nipple.
By the way, Okay, I was gonna say something that I like, took it back because I know one of you, but just gonna be like, it's like that girl who was like, girl, that's not an ick, You're a lesbian, but this is how I feel about everybody's body, like for the most part.
Like that's a lie though, because I find like women like I'm like, yes, naked woman, like the amount of like picture books.
The last twenty three episodes of this podcast has been in your like discovering her sexual album.
No, it has been. It has been me defending my straightness. I'm like, I am straight, Like I go after and I love men, And do I find them attracted outside of a relationship. No, but that's okay, and that's normal to like find them absolutely repulsive until you're dating them. Yeah, Because I was gonna say, like, everybody finds dick's gross
until they're attracted or into the person. But then I was like, I don't think, like, as a straight woman, that would be a lie because I've I find penis is very.
Beautiful, lovely, They're pretty.
They're so fucking ugly, like there so discussing.
Me.
Vaginas are scary.
I was gonna say, like.
They are like prettier though.
They're pretty, they're literally packaged up in a little like like like COUCHI is packaged up. You get to unwrap the gift, like, oh my god, I did like you like you're literally like you're invading my invading my personal space or I'm freaking out, get away until I like the person. When I like the person, I'm like, give it to me, about to like I'm about to like first we feast like that's my boy when I know the man. But before I know the man, it's literally
the worst thing I've ever seen. Also, I don't find wait wait wait, wait wait, we had to tell the story. Now you know what I'm talking about. Devin just talks to us. That was our reaction.
I literally guess.
One time Devin for the first time sent us an audio message of me and you were driving and we genuinely go we off like us out and then we listened we are in love with in the midst of my like, like I'm straight do I gasp? When Devin Lee Carlson interact with me.
Yes, it's it's more of a maternal thing for me. I think, Yeah, I want her to like tell me it's gonna be.
You to hold me. I literally I wish I could trink myself down and Devon could carry me like this on.
Her lap and then maybe breastfeade. I'm kidding, I'm saying this like we're not friends.
No, it's okay, she would, she would, she would laugh at it.
Even maybe she would laugh at it.
Spoiler alert foreshadowing. But yeah, so basic.
What I'm saying is, I'm like, straight, real shit, Okay, I just have one.
I just have one that says Elliott Smith.
Oh, I can't get down with Elliott Smith.
I'm gonna be honest, like, yeah, this is a good one.
And it kind of piggybacks off that I have done a really good job at avoiding my triggers, one of them being space. Anything involving space anymore, like I literally cannot do I cannot do it.
I can't. It freaks me the fuck out.
I wish I wish I could get as like my like I.
Gee, I'm thinking about it inspiring internally.
Like my idea of like being existential is like realizing that like everyone I like, Okay, this is your existential is like I mean nothing, and like my world is so small blah blah blah blah. But see I've like perfected monkey brain that I don't fucking care. Like I'm like, I am here to buy my little things and do
my little things and love the people I love. But what makes me existential is like knowing that one day, like I will feel like the extreme despair of like losing the people I love the most, because this is my like despair And next essential thing that I wrote in the middle, like so I said the twenty five cents thing and then I said, there's so much suffering in the human experience. The fact that one of us will inevitably have to endure the experience of losing one
another is terrifying. Not me, And then I said, TSA is fake like real real.
But no, literally, just when I think about outer space, it literally it freaks me the fuck out. I used to love it. I used to want to be an astronomer.
M mmm, like looking up at the stars at night, Like when we're in Joshua Tree and I go outside and I look at the stars, I am actually having a.
Panic attack outside because I'm like, that is not real.
I'm sorry, I'm a space denier. I'll admit it first. I'm a space but I have to be. I have to be because from my own.
Why is it? Because like you're like, everything is so like big, but who fucking cares? Because it has nothing to do with you. That's my whole thing. That's why I'm like, when y'all want to go to space like that.
Ship that is nothing does it does? See?
No, it's probably just too many psychedelics as like a developing brain child.
But girl, if you think about it, we are that, we are space. That's what freaks me out.
No, we're not because I'll be getting my period and I'm like, I'm not the fucking sun in the stars. I gotta put a Diva cup in right now. And I know the sun and the stars don't have to be putting a Diva cup in their pussy like.
Your stardust, whether you like it or not, your empty space.
In stock not because I have a lot of thoughts.
Also, you know what else freaks me out is like how much empty space everything is made of? Like this should not be solid?
Why is it fucking solid? Make that makes sense.
See, I guess that's the thing about that.
Like that's what I'm saying, Like, who fucking cares?
Like you're so like an atomic level, Like if an atom is made up of mostly empty.
Space, to do is go fuck.
What you need to do is on an atomic level, find some bitches.
You need some bitches because you're born as fuck talking about what's in this dry wall? Bitch?
Empty space? No, but like think about that, think about the antim is made.
Up the craziest shit. I'm like, you want to feel it so bad and poke a hole in it?
Like fuck the wall? No, think about that though, Like.
What am I thinking about? And atom is made up of mostly empty space?
Everything this is adam, I don't care about.
And everything around you is made up of atoms. Why is anything solid?
I don't give a fuck. Can I eat it? Can I touch it? Cool? Whatever? Bye?
But also something else I thought about it?
Can I touch it? Can I fuck it?
That's all very interesting that like you like you.
Zoom all the way out of as far as we can see. Sorry, I'll shut the I need to.
Hear that into this. I need to hear that into this. He saw me, look at you?
You zoom out as far as you can, like as we can like observe, which you can't, and like I'm saying.
As far as we can observe, kay, And like.
You see like little specks everywhere, and those specs are like planets or solars or yeah, solar systems, and then I mean our galaxies and then those galaxies have solar systems, millions of solar systems in them. And then you like get into our solar system and there's like it it's
unfathomably large. And then you get on Earth and it's unfathomably large, and then like you zoom down to like the molecular level, and then you kind of end up back there at like the molecular level, like like I don't know, do you know what I'm saying?
You know what it is, I've I haven't.
Had enough of trillions of cells in each of those cells is like kind of like a galaxy, and then inside of each of those galaxies are like little solar systems like the mitochondria and blah blah blah blah blah blah.
Bitches like me don't have time to think about that kind of shit because I'm like, is my family eating.
See, that's why I can't smoke weed, because that's what I think about.
What that's why I like smoking weed because my burn's already off and that ship like turbo offs it like right now, it's in sleep mode. And when I like have weed, it like fucking it's like all the little meals like go down and like shut down the power plant.
I'm not ready to be diagnosed. In the comments after that, no.
They're gonna No, they're gonna diagnose you with boreds need some bitches.
You need some bitches disorder?
Yeah, because motherfucker was about to go back to his nose. Not that.
This is the part of the episode where we ask our patrons questions and you.
Know they ask us questions.
Yeah, patrons ask us questions and we answer them, and it's only questions the patreons asking.
So don't leave your fucking questions in the comments asks who's stink the most, and yeah, me.
And has the stinkiest fucking shits in the world. I walk into the bathroom after she shits, and I am greeted with like heavier air and it's like I run into a fucking wall.
Well, Also, the problem is you don't shit. Yeah, so maybe if you like everything you put in your body came out, your ship would stink more.
Actually, it is kind of concerning because I don't know how many days it's been since that shit, Like I've lost count, and that's like dangerous, but it's it's coming. Maybe that's the big thing that's coming.
Can we have your pertido and cheese after this? Yes? Sounds good as and the.
Tattooana Perez asks how is being how has being a troll affected your relationships?
Like being like a troll by nature?
If you can't handle it, get out of my fucking life.
Yeah, like I haven't. Like I I think I'm pretty good. Or does that mean romantic I'm assuming it means romantic relationships, though I think it means just in general. No, in general, Like I feel like we're pretty good at meeting someone and like testing the waters, and like we know with certain people we can amp it up and with certain people we just don't bring it there. And then I find most times we turn people out.
Like yeah, we literally do.
We turn bitches out.
Like everything we need to be goofy.
Yeah, we're like you need to open up, like this is funny, but we were pretty lucky. We usually, no, we're not lucky. We're fucking annoying. We only attract other annoying bitches exactly.
You attract what you put out there, and annoying is what we get.
You are what you eat, and we eat each other.
We eat each other out.
Belle asks, if y'all could take credit for inventing something, what would it be?
The anti vaxxer?
Something that exists, you fucking bitch.
Like saw like plants.
I the first thing I thought of was like the beauty blunder for some reason, because I just know that, like that's a multi really in our fucking company. Me, that's a big assumption, that's I want to take credit for.
Like q a on, I think.
I'll take credit for the vaccine.
Next q am, I.
Q at white people?
Next question?
I dude, I remember my like super big disdain for white people when I first moved to l A. And then I spent like two years really trying to like reformation like put myself out like I was like, I'm not Latina, Like if anybody asked, like I'm not, like I like am white, So I am am white? White?
White? Wait?
White? No, I love white people they're fucking they're the best.
Thank you, Thank you to ask if you were given free tickets to see James Charles.
Live, which yes, are you fucking kidding? If someone gave me tickets to see The Mother, for which I would buy tickets to see that Mother and I buy VIP, I.
Would shake my bear ass for tickets to James char.
I want, I want him to go on tour.
He's not gonna, though, James Charles gone tour, challenge or right e then media out of the week media. So with Spotify rapped, just.
Rapping, I thought, you know, I'm gonna give the people a little taste of my Spotify rap because that's what I've been listening to, is my twenty twenty one Spotify playlist.
And.
I think, um, damn, but everything on here I've already fucking said.
I know.
That's that's why I'm like, I can't even like talk about that because I'm.
Like everything, yeah, never mind me when it's.
Only gotten up like seven hundred.
But I'm gonna, yeah, never fucking mind on the Spotify rap. I'm just gonna go to my other playlist and the most recent songs is I'm God by Little b Imagen Heap sample is that Imagen Heap. I don't know the song, but is how you say the name?
Yeah, as far as I bitch, I'm the worst person. Someone literally made fun of me for like something that I was like, I don't know how to pronounce and they were like, the way you pronounce is literally on the cover, but it's not. It's not like on the cover. They're just talking about that little asterisk above you. I was like, I don't know what those things mean, Like, I don't know why you're assuming that.
You're right Pew by Arca.
That fucking album is really good.
I have to give Arca listen. I saw dude, I saw the clips from her fucking live show. Oh my god, I wish I went. It looked so fucking fun.
And then anyone else but you by the Moldy Peaches, It's a really a cute song. And then oh my fucking god, I can't believe it took me this long to one figure this show out that it existed, and two that like, I feel like not enough people at least in our like Vicinity, are talking about but the show kid Nation is single handedly the greatest reality show that's ever been aired on television, and I will stand by that plan with my entire fucking chest. It is the most.
Insane shit ever.
Like I cannot believe that this was one green lit and two like like it came together as well as it did. Basically, what they do, like I'll give like a brief synopsis, is they send a shit ton of children to the middle of New Mexico, the middle of nowhere, in a town with like one running water, one toilet, and it's like sixty children and no adult supervision and they have to build a fucking city and like make
it work. It's fucking insane. And I was like when Lucas and Joshua pitching it to me, I was like, yeah, right, there's no way. There's not adults supervision. No, And they make it extra fucking hard on these kids, like they they make them like walk half a mile to get their water for this show, Like it's fucking insane, and then their water pipes like freeze halfway through, so they just don't have clean water.
It's fucking insane and you should just watch it.
Oh my god, that sounds like bad.
No, No, that's the thing is, it's like the worst thing ever made. It had one season and everybody was like, dude, this is gnarly because like, also you see the kids on there, like they're like I just missed my parents.
And they're eight years old. They're like they're like eight to like fourteen. It's fucking absurd. This one girl has her birthday. She's the best character.
She has her birthday on there, and it's really sad, but something good happens to her.
Okay, well, pic my show Media or like visual Media is pen fifteen best show in the world. How To with John Wilson also another really good fucking show. And then my audio is Mystified by Fleetwood Mac.
But it's not though, that's like not yours.
So like I don't understand, like you're saying that.
I want to fucking slap you how much I feel by Ambrosia and Girls Girls Girls by jay Z, which.
I feel like I said last time, Yeah you said that one.
Oopsie fine enjoyed the silence by the pitch mode, the pitchy, the pitch whatever, fuck you And that's it.
That's the episode. Subscribe to the Patreon for extra content.
Peace and love, unity and respect, plur bye her burd