I Became a Styrofoam Smuggler

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The elvist Ran after party.

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Yeah? All right.

I did something I didn't think I would ever do.

I became a smuggler over the weekend.

I don't even want to know.

So did you notice Scotti b laughing and clapping.

You?

Would you care to explain how this smuggling came to be. I think I'm pretty sure I broke the law, and you are now breaking the law.

I don't know if ether one of us actually did, but I just looked it up, so go ahead. Okay, So the environmentalists are gonna yell at me, but I I prefer a styrofoam coffee cup because I've been using them for years.

And I hate you already.

I'm crazy the way that I'm regimented. And when I use that cup, I know exactly where I can start drinking my coffee on my way to work because it's the perfect temperature and whatever.

You're a scumbag. Wait, do they make cyropham cups anymore?

Yes, that's where this is heading. Okay, So I order cases of a thousand of them, and they last me like two or three years. And in between the time I ordered the last case and the time that I ran out, they were outlawed in New York.

And New Jersey, as they should because they're terrible.

That's cool. So it's a lot of things. Oh that is getting terrible, that's great. Well my kids will have to deal with it. I don't give a crap.

So anyway, worst fathering moment I've ever heard come from you, and I've heard.

Some bad ones, but go on. Anyway, it's convenient for me, so I don't care.

All right.

So anyway, I went on Amazon and it's like, sorry, can no longer be shipped to your area. I'm like, what the hell? Then I tried your house, Danielle and Jersey thing. I don't want to get your startpuck cups. People know it's coming to my.

House, participated in smuggling, and then we keep going.

So then I was like, oh, wait a minute, Nate's parents live in Pennsylvania. Pennsylvania doesn't care. So I went on and Amazon's like, sure, you could send it to Pennsylvania.

My god.

So I asked Nate. I'm like, hey, when's the next time you're gonna be in Pennsylvania because I want these cups. He's like, I want to be there this weekend. I'm like, cool, can I send them to your parents? And he's like, yep, I'll bring them in for you. So I ordered them to his parents' house that were delivered everything. And this morning Nate's like, hey, man, I got the cups. Im downstairs. I was all right, cool, so I ran down, I grabbed him, I put him in my truck and here

Years, Yes, smuggler, here we are.

And I looked it up.

They've been outlawed in banned, which I don't even know if we can be in possession of them.

So you love to see Scott get dragged out of his home over these cups like a drag.

To get pulled over on the l ice.

So good.

Is that a possibility that you could get arrested for having them?

Fine?

No, because they still exist, they're still made, and they're still legal in a lot of the country.

Yeah, And I don't know having one cup, it'd be like, okay, you got a dime bag on you. Yeah, I was essentially trafficking styrofoam. And I will tell you. This box was enormous. When I got to my parents' house, we I couldn't even go in the front door because the box was so big.

It was the size of a casket.

Nay, you realize you're an accomplishment.

I know I am.

And technically you're gonna do the time, not him.

Because because.

Are you on the state line.

Well here's the thing. Look, they're not for purchase in New York and New Jersey.

Are you gonna do a little black market styrofoam cups?

I'll go downstairs and sell sleeves of them. I don't care. No, But I think I think that there. I think that food service places are still allowed to use the takeout containers. I think could still be styrofoam, but for whatever reason, no, no more cups allowed.

Cups. Okay. It's amazing to me.

Like when when I was in Florida in Jacksonville and I'm in a store and they're bagging stuff in plastic bags.

I'm like, what is happening? The same thing.

Yeah, They're like, oh, it's fine here, but what Okay, But here's the thing. You can still buy them in New York. Like the shop right that I go to they sell cases of them, but there are not a lot of bad groceries in them. So I buy cases and then I bag my own groceries in plastic bags. I will not change.

Wait, I didn't know that you can buy because.

You could buy them a costco too.

Cases.

It seems to be Scott's motto written across his forehead, like he's been thinking about a tattoo.

It should be I will not change.

That's right, and belligerently, I'm stuck in my ways.

Say this and find a way to continue. I don't want it.

I don't want to appear to be defending Scottie because I am all. Also, let's be clear, I am for the outlawing of styrofoam, but I will say this. They the drink does taste different in styrofoam containers, then it doesn't plastic.

Yeah, it does taste.

Taste the best in a glass. Or can't put hot coffee in a glass?

You can put hot coffee in a thermos.

Drive the car with a glass, you have to speed. I also, I also have a glove compartment full of plastic straws for those damn restaurants, and only a paper.

Guess you're not going to change, Garrett.

Let me get you up to speed.

I participated in smuggling Scotty's how many thousands, one thousand, one thousand styrofoam cups?

Oh, you're smuggling for Scotty too. I'm smuggling for Scotty as well.

Scotty.

Hey, wait, what.

So so Scotty wants to save on taxes?

Come on, dude, now, I'll go to jail.

So he ships things to my house.

You use all your Jersey people, I.

Ship some to you.

When did he call?

When did.

What?

You want to know?

Why?

Because he felt guilty of the amount of packages he sent it to my house over the last two weeks.

Oh my gosh, I got prom dresses sent to my house.

Garrett had dozens of Amazon boxes on the.

Spot, no joke. Probably about fifteen bus carry.

Half of that in.

And you know what, It makes me happy that.

Scott has not asked me to do this, because I think he knows I would tell him off.

No, you live in an apartment building. I get nervous.

Okay, okay, how much money did you say sending stuff to Garrett and to Daniel?

Hundreds of dollars?

That much?

Yes?

When he told me the price that it costs for all these packages and the amount of money he was saving us. Like, how can you say no, like the state sales Yes, yeah.

Well because there's no tax on clothing or shoes in Jersey. Oh yes, zero?

True?

Wait is this illegal?

Like what we're doing right and we're admitting to like like kind of why?

I just want to see dragging.

Scotty.

I don't know that we should be talking about this at the time. That Hold on a second.

I'm a legal resident of the state of New Jersey, and when I go shopping in New York at mall's, I have This has happened quite a bit, that's right. Rather than walking out of the store with the merch, they were like, they tell me behind the counter, we could just send it to your house and it's and you don't get taxed. I'm like, great, idea, Now I don't have shopping bags. I could walk out of here and in two days.

You're a resident, so.

You're not doing anything wrong.

He's not a resident.

I've done this for Robin before years in Brooklyn.

You're now you're with Scotty. You and Scotty control.

Gift. Technically, Robin lives with you, so sure that.

Yeah, I don't know.

It's such a great area because you can have it sent anywhere.

Right.

In fact, I think Pennsylvania's tax is cheaper and there is no tax on clothing. So you're gonna start sending stuff in my parents' house to Scotty.

Yeah.

What else is leanient in Pennsylvania that's not in New York.

Journastic bags everywhere, fireworks works.

I think fireworks are legal here now too, not like they are in Pennsylvania. Yeah, but not you can't buy an M. E. D And shop right, you can buy maybe a bottle rocket with your birthday cake.

Scotty.

Remember when we went to go get fireworks one year and we had to be very careful that the police would pull us over.

Yes, because a lot of times when you go to the ones that are right over the border in Pennsylvania, like the police will wait in the park and they watched the people with New York and New Jersey plates and they pull them over.

I felt like we were like running from the law. After we got out of the fireworks store that one time, they were like, all right, keep a lookout over your shoulder if you see anybody.

I get nervous for that stuff. I wouldn't be nervous for style from cups, but fireworks.

Yes.

I would like to say.

You're scamming the system, but I think you're just outsmarting the system.

Look, I'm just getting what I need and I gotta get it however I need to.

You know, you only bring in the ky.

That's very heavily taxed in New York. So yeah, are you serious?

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