Money does not make you mature.
M that's a fact. And raising four black young men, I'm hypersensitive about the things that they're watching and exposed to and possibly overexposed to. So we have to put parenting on a hundred All right, dead asss Hey, I'm Kadeen and I'm Devout and we're the Ellis's.
You may know us from posting funny videos with our.
Boys and reading each other publicly as a form of therapy. Wait, I make you need therapy most days.
Wow.
And one more important thing to mention, we're married.
Yes, sir, we are.
We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of li's most taboo topics.
Things most folks don't want to talk about.
Through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass is a term that we say every day.
So when we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts one hundred, the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.
We about to take pilot off to our whole new level.
Dead ass starts right now.
So, as you guys know, I play in the NFL for four years.
During that time, I met a lot of interesting characters. Being in an NFL locker room is very different. During the time when I was there, I happened to play with a lot of men who made a lot of money because the Detroit Lions were always drafting extremely high because.
They lost a lot.
So you're in the locker room with a ton of first round draft picks. And during that time, I remember seeing a lot of young men who after doing two to three years in college. I say two to three years because if you read short and that you did two years or you played three years straight as a freshman, you're really only twenty one and you're signing deals upwards of twenty million dollars guaranteed as a top ten draft
pick in the NFL. And I watched a lot of young men do some destructive things during that time.
And I just watched all of the chatter of so many people. You're like, wow, they do that.
He's making money out of you do it making money, And it made me realize it doesn't matter if you give an immature twenty one, twenty two year old a dollar or a million dollars, they gonna do something fucked up with it.
That's a fact.
And I watched it firsthand.
I don't know what they want for me It's like the more money we cover across the problem we see. Now, what's the next part? Who hot? Oh?
Oh, that's I'm thinking. I'm thinking Diddy's part of my back.
Who hot? Who not tell me who set out in the stores?
You're telling me? Whoop? Who capped the blue drop? Jews got? Who mostly knows s pimp?
You know anything changed with my lips?
Can't stop to your name on the black guarantee you yourself? Whn't believe in hall the world, the double up.
We don't play around bad down didn't know me.
No one they know me.
Now I'm the young nigga with the goldens down.
Can't can hold me? Dad e sciom me to the game.
Do this.
All right?
All right, shout out all the world, Diddy.
Sometimes we be aging ourselves like we.
Do because I don't even remember the words no more.
That's a fact. You know. We got a It's not like riding a bike like they said it would be. Yes, remember these song lyrics. All right, we're talking about what makes a mature man, and I don't know the least you have to tell us the vow. Let's pay some bills and come back and we'll talk we'll talk some
current events stuff. All right, we're back. Yes, story time, you're talking about the characters that you met in the NFL, and particularly this episode, we will be talking about the Jahn Morant situation going on, and that's been in the news lately about some of the some saying immature decisions that he's been making, and what we're thinking is behind the this is driving force behind those types of decisions
just in general. So you can speak to this as a male, as an athlete formerly, and me particularly chiming in as a mom raising for boys.
Right, there's a lot to unpack here, right, And the first thing I want to unpack is this idea that John Morant, because he went to a private school and grew up with both his parents, a lot of people question his blackness. Remember we talked about this, like your blackness has to be associated with struggle, because if you didn't struggle at a certain part in life, then you're not.
Really that How how authentic is your story really?
Right?
Or you're not hood if you didn't grow up in a different type of environment.
Now here's the truth, right.
Being in the streets and proximity to the streets is two different things right from what we know, I don't know much about John Moran's life. I don't I know he grew up with both of his parents. His dad is clearly in his life because he's at every game. They said he went to private school. Let me tell you something about going to private school. When I was at poly Prep. When I retired from the NFL, I
coached at poly Prep for two years. I watched as they recruited young kids from the inner cities to go to poly Prep, but they didn't live around poly Prep. And the reason why I say that is because all these people who are saying, oh, he went to private school, he not hood understand this. Every year poly Prep we
recruited five elite athletes who were on scholarship. Poly Prep was a forty thousand dollars a year school, and a part of going to this school and playing football for the school was that they were going to pay because your parents couldn't afford give you a better opportunity.
So they were busting them into Dyker Heights.
Pretty much busting them into Dyker Heights, but they did not live in Dyker Heights, and a lot of these young men were not from Dyker heights. So this idea that since you go to a private school, your life wasn't rough, it's just a facade. It's fake and people are just talking out their ass. That's number one. Number two, the idea that you live in a private house means that you can't be street.
Another fake, another facade.
Because I grew up in Canarsi, the flaws right, pop Smoke grew up in Canarsi and the flaws.
I grew up with both my parents, right.
I still had to go from Canarsi all the way to Marine Park to go to school, which means I had to get on that school bus and I had to travel on that Not school, I had to go on a city bus, and I had to travel on the B eighty two forty five minutes every morning by myself. And I was doing that from the time I was thirteen years old. My brother went to roy Age Man He's been traveling on the bus on his own since
he was ten years old. The things you learn on that bus ride have nothing to do with where you reside at night. The things you do during the day and where you frequent have nothing to do with where you reside at night. The idea that because Jamar grew up in a private house. I went to a private school, and can't be street is a facade. Lastly, the idea that you grew up with both your parents means that you cannot be hood is a facade. I grew up with both my parents. I know plenty of people who
grew up with both their parents. You know what both their parents did all day work and you know where them kids were in the streets, in the streets. And it wasn't because yes, and it wasn't because their parents weren't good people. It wasn't because their parents weren't giving
them a good opportunity. But if you grew up like I grew up in Brooklyn, yeah, you may grow up in a private house with both your parents in Brooklyn, but from eight o'clock in the morning till six pm, sometimes seven pm, if your parents worked like my parents, you.
Were on your own lifesses.
And my parents told me, you come straight from home, you in school, You come straight from school, you go inside, you go home.
You know what I did, went straight from school to the street.
I was with my peoples, I was with my boys, We was playing, I was outside, I was.
Doing all sorts getting home by any means necessary, all of us friendly, Oh this that, And.
We grew up during a time when there were no cell phones and there was no social media, there was no technology to track you. So this idea that Jama rent because of all these things we know about his life can't be street is fake.
That's not real.
There are plenty of people who grew up in that type of environment who have a lot more street sense in savvy than other people who you proclaim grew up in certain areas. For example, I have a homegirl grew up in the projects, never been outside. You want to know why her single mom told her black ass she could not go outside. And this young lady, I don't want to say her name, is probably one of the
most sheltered people. And she grew up in the projects because her mom made a choice to keep her away from all the elements outside of her. And if you would look at her, and you look at the way I grew up, I was in the street, made way more than her. I grew up in the church, in a dual family, dual parent household, in a private home, with every opportunity to be successful.
When I was still in the street because I was.
Just, what is the desire to have that street, to be in the mix? Is it just something growing up? You feel like you're missing something because you know me, I grew up. Also, yeah, you go to Gary Shelter like I'm not going past my front gate, go to school, get picked up, dropped off like there was no room for me really to be you know, go astray. So what is the desire to be in the street.
I don't.
I don't think it's a desire. I think it's like, what else are you gonna do? You're you know, you want to spend time with your friends. As a child, what is more important than you than your friends?
Nothing?
Nothing is more important. If all of my friends are outside, then I'm going outside. And my parents gave my brother and I and my sisters were enough latitude to navigate the streets on our own.
So I learned how to use tokens. This is before metro card.
I learned how to use tokens and travel on the train and the bus from the time I was very very young. My aunt Debbie used to take me and my cousin DeVaughn on the train from as young as five and six years old, and when I got old enough to travel on my own, which is people say times are different now, but they really aren't that different. I was traveling on the city bus from ten double digits. Was like, okay, double digits, you can traveling on. You know how to get here, you know how to read
the map. So my environment in my house were two different things. My house and where I lived was one thing. But my environment and where I grew up was in Flatbush between Church. I grew up between the streets of Church and I would say King's Highway, that whole area between Nasareth Regional High School, Erasmus High School, clar Salem Missionary Baptist Church, Tennis Court. That was all of my neighborhood. That's why I spent most of my time see and.
My mother would have never And now at that point I was living in Kannarsi, which was known to be the private houses in Knarsi. So that's where you know, your hardworking middle class you know Brooklyn Iights would be.
But then what about this conflict that you've mentioned recently with wanting to first off, we've moved our children from there, yes, and now we're you know, in the suburbs of Atlanta, but then also wanting your kids to have that street edge, So like, why is that still a thing that you need to have, particularly as a male.
It's a good question. To me.
It wasn't so much about street edge. It was more about awareness. I want I want my sons to know how to navigate the world. Okay, I learned how to navigate the world through the street. Imagine being ten years old and you get lost on the subway, you know. Imagine being ten years old and you lose your wallet. You have no money, but you have to get home. You find ways, you know, you learn how to maneuver and pivot, and you learn how not to be scared because you've dealt with so much at a young age.
I don't want to coddle my son so much that when they get out in the world and I'm not there for the first time, they don't know how.
To move walking around looking like target. Yes, yes, that kind of sense.
Yeah.
And when I think about the whole John Morant situation, here's another aspect that people don't think about. I grew up in Brooklyn. I have tons of friends who do not live the same type of life I live. And when I mean life. I'm talking about the legal life that I live. They have a different type of life. And when you're twenty two and you have that group of friends that's still around you, and now you're the
one that's in the spotlight. Those behaviors that you practiced when you were in high school in early college, those don't stop just because you're making millions of dollars. You know what happens, there's just now a greater spotlight on you. So when people are saying, how come he you know he's worth one hundred million dollars, why don't he make
better decisions? I think we need to give this young man grace to learn how to make better decisions because he's learning how to do it in real time with a lot of people watching him. Now, that doesn't excuse his behavior, right, for example, going on Live with a pistol. Right, people are saying, allegedly, but it was him showing a pistol on his live, him getting into physical altercations with kids,
or quote unquote pulling out pistols allegedly. The only reason why I say I can say allegedly is because I wasn't there and there's no proof, And I think it's an open case, so whatever. So I don't want to say this would happen. But what I'm saying is is these situations and stuff like this happen all the time, and we don't have any Like the outside world doesn't
see these things happening. But when you have someone who's worth a hundred million dollars and the spotlight is always on him and he makes the same decisions he's been making his whole life and it's been successful making these decisions, you can't automatically say now, well, why don't you stop this behavior.
You're worth a hundred million dollars.
He has to learn that, and sometimes learning that comes with consequences, which means like now he gets in trouble, gets suspended from the team for two days, has to go work on some things with his mental health. Like that's learning during the process. I just want us as people to give him grace and don't write him off as just another stupid athlete or make fun of the fact that, well, he grew up with both his parents.
Why is he trying to act tough?
So essentially he's making mistakes that all twenty one year old makes. Twenty one year olds make but he's on the spotlight and be has the money.
Hey, we went to college together. You've seen a decision some of my friends made in college.
Absolutely with a lot less to lose, you know what I'm saying, right, or more in some situations because it's like, man, this is my only chance to get out, I'm on scholarship if I messed this up, and we've seen so many cases like more so, where are the people who are walking him through, for example, the high school process, the draft process, Like when that essentially is over and now he's a quote unquote grown man making his own money, making male decisions, does he still have that team of
people who are there to support him and make sure that he's on the straight and narrow or that they just just kind of drop off once he makes that because they have handlers and people who see them through this entire process. And then is it that he's left to his own devices once I'm saying he as a job like the athlete.
I'm glad you asked that question, because this is part of being an athlete that or even a young entertainer that people don't see when you're a prodigy, right and you're the person everyone expects is going to be the
one to make it out right. When you're making poor decisions throughout your pre adolescent years, then your adolescent years, then in high school when you're making these poor decisions, a lot of times you get coddled and people cover up for you, so you really don't learn and understand consequences because you make a poor decision or you do something dumb and then someone else out of know where it comes up.
We got to protect so and so on. Let's sweep this under the rod. Let's make this okay.
So now that person is learning that, oh, I can pretty much do what I want, or it's not that big of a deal. If they made it go away, it's not that big of a deal. So what they do repeat the behavior, and then the higher you get in that level, like they'll cover for you in junior high school. Oh, but now you're being recruited to go one of the top high schools, or now they're going to cover for you in the high school, especially if
you go to one of these private schools. A lot of times they will cover for and I'm not just talking about athletes.
I worked at poly Prep.
If you have someone who's generating, generating resources and bringing funds to a school.
For everybody, they're going to cover for you.
Case in point, at poly Prep, I worked with some entertainers who are world renowned their children. Their children were on the football team, and I watched those young men who are not black, who came from affluent families, who came from generations of money, make poor decisions. And you know what happened When they made poor decisions, someone covered for them. Had nothing to do with being black. These people were white and rich and they covered for them.
But the school covered because their parents bringing me resources. Right when you're an athlete and they're paying for your tuishing to go to these schools, but also the boosters are generating, we're bringing money to the program into the school,
the school is going to cover for you. So when you had make a poor decision in high school and they cover for you, then you get to college and you're the elite athlete in college and you make another poor decision, and now they cover for you because so many other people outside of you are invested in your success because your success means they gain access.
To resources and funds.
It's easy to understand how a young person can then become an adult, and now there's no one here to buffer for you because you're an adult and you have a phone and you're doing the same things you did, But now the whole world is condemning you, and people think twenty three is grown, twenty three is.
A baby baby, a baby baby.
You're making poor decisions.
Now everyone's like, oh, he got to do better. Where's his dad, where's this person. It's a process. Let this young man go through the process and learn, and that does not excuse his behavior, because his behavior, if he's done what they're saying he did, is inexcusable.
For sure. It's funny you say twenty three is still a baby, which, of course know that. Think about us at twenty three, we thought we had everything figured out, okay, And you've said it before. In your twenties, you think you know everything.
Oh, the same thing. From fifteen to twenty, you think you know everything right. From twenty to twenty five, you know you know everything. From twenty five to thirty you start to realize, like, wait a minute.
With the trembling voice, I didn't know shit.
And then you spend all of your thirties trying to fix all of the mistakes you made. I said that about myself all the time, Like I look back at some of the stuff I did in my twenties and I'm like, dang, I did that.
I thought like that when we look at people who are twenty something year old, now we're just like y'all trying to do what? Like how did we? I know that's how our family was looking at us, like y'all are crazy, Like ain't you trying to move all the way to Detroit to follow your man and you're twenty two years old? Like, girl, what are you doing? But it's funny because a study commissioned by Nickelodeon UK found that men don't reach maturity until forty three. I mean,
do you think that's accurate or not? I mean, I mean, be a little immature.
I could be a little immature at times, you know what I'm saying, So.
All in the fun but I mean, you know that's case the case because you did have a certain level of maturity though with a lot of other things, yes, early in your twenties than you did. But I guess this was.
Like but I think I think maturity is relative, and I think maturity and.
Awareness are two different things.
I think I was a little I was a little aware of certain things because of how I had to live my life, because I pretty much and I don't want to say raise myself because my parents were there. But being eight and having to get your brother and bring him home and help him with his schoolwork and do a sort of stuff kind of grew me up fast. Traveling on my own from ten and doing all this stuff grew me up fast.
So maybe it's also to not necessarily awareness versus maturity. But at a certain age you realize that you're not as invincible as you thought you were. Yes, you know, like some things you think are not a big deal in your twenties, people looking at it in their thirties and forties would be like, yeah, that's a big deal. Like to chill out, you know what I'm saying. They're
saying that typically women mature around thirty two. Interesting, and when talking about maturity, the science is based on how the brain matures. Female brains tend to identify from being the moment she was a girl. However, it's not until a male begins to produce testosterone that their brains are
distinguishable from females. Interesting as puberty starts, female brain jumps to at least two years older than their physical age, whereas males, however, usually take until their late teen years or even early twenties to match their female peers mental age.
Interesting, it kind of goes in line with all the older guys that be at the high schools trying to get the same girls.
You know what I'm saying.
It's like all them girls in high school think the high school boys are so immature, so they want to date the old guys. Right, But now we call those guys pedophiles. But I remember growing up and that was that was the thing all the time.
The girl Katti, when is he going to grow up? Is he going to grow up? You know?
In there maturity, But maturity and wisdom comes with experience and also stepping in it.
Sometimes I'll give making mistakes. I'll give you an example, right.
You know how much I love black women, right, My mom's black, my aunts, my grandmother's black, like they all black. I love black women. I've been supported right by black women my whole life. But I remember doing an interview with Madame Noir, and I wanted to create a dialogue about what pack about what people think.
So it was called ask a black man. They asked me, or do ask a black man?
And they asked the question, what's the first thing you think of when someone says a black woman?
Right?
And my first response is, man, people always say black women are angry. That's not what I thought, but that's the first thing when people say, oh black women. So I said, oh, angry, and I'm thinking this is going to create dialogue about how people view black women as angry. And then the comments people upset, like, oh, you think black women are angry? And I said, I never said
I thought it. The question was framed to me as what's the first what's the first thing people think of when when you say black women?
And I was like, angry.
Let's talk about why people think that, because I wanted to have a conversation about how black women had to try to find a way to thrive for themselves.
And I was twenty how old were you at the time? Would have never answered that, I don't.
Think because of experience, And that's my whole reading the room.
Right, You can't just say can't say that, because what they're going to do is take that clip of you saying angry and then it goes viral and then exactly what happens, But that's black women's angry.
And that's my point though, was that experience taught me how to and it's you know, people call it media training.
It's not media training.
It's experience of how to answer questions or how to add context to whatever you want to say so that people can understand what where you're coming from. But what my point is is that that took time. I'm thirty eight years old now and I would answer that completely differently. But in that time, I was in my mood like I'm getting ready to defend why black people, why women think black people are angry, and they took it as
devout things Black women are angry. And when I look back on it, I can't even be mad at them because when I look back at it, I'm like, that's what it seems like I said. But then you would have to watch the whole episode to understand where I'm coming from. But then even in that, it's like devout, Why would you even answer that like that?
But it took me time.
You know what I'm saying, and that's what I'm trying to get people to understand what this situation is that he is going to need time to learn how to deal with everything that's coming at him, right, Like, everybody isn't going to be Lebron James and go.
Through the NBA unscathed by any scandals.
Like, first of all, the fact that Lebron James has gone through the entire his entire NBA career during the social media era with all the scrutiny unscathed is kudos to him, right, But also it says a lot about how he grew up because he had a single mom, he was in the streets a lot, and he had to learn on his own. And maybe that's the reason why he has a lot more wisdom when it comes to doing certain things because he did it on his own.
If John grew up in a little town where he was coddled by his parents and then went to a private school, that may be a reason why he doesn't understand how his behavior is being perceived so negatively by people. And yes, it is being perceived negatively by people for a reason, but he has to understand that.
So think about accountability partners. Right. Lebron, for example, had Savannah that he grew up with literally since there were babies. You and I have each other who has literally grown
up since we were babies together. Do you think it helps to have somebody if it's not a partner, but just someone who's that accountability partner, that might be that person on your shoulder, Like, don't do that because you know, because you said, you feel like you've been a lot more successful having, for example, a woman by your side who has helped to keep you afloat. Do you think that that is something that would benefit from other people.
No, I think you got to be your own accountability partner and be aware because this that happens when you have accountability partner. If your accountability partner misses something, now you have somebody to blame. Well, you're supposed to be the one to check me on that. No, you have to go through stuff in life, and here's the sad truth. Sometimes you got to hit rock bottom.
Yeah.
Right. For example, the thing with me and the interview.
After people saying, oh, don't like black women and he hates black women. Because of that statement, I had to really reflect and be like, I answered that so wrong. But it took me having to deal with that. If I had an accountability as someone else who was on my shoulder, who was just like, if I don't say that, because they're going to take it like this, and I just listened. That would work until that person is no
longer there. I had to learn and go through that on my own, realize how you hurt people, Realize how what you say and what you do is not always what you mean, but how people perceive it and how they take it matters. And sometimes it takes you going through that to realize it. So I don't believe in the accountability partner thing. When it comes to being responded for yourself. You have to deal with it, go through
the fire like he's going through the fire now. And I guarantee you because if you actually listen to John Morantz speak, he's a very intelligent person.
Right.
He may not be the most eloquent or articulate at times because once again he's still very very young. Yeah, but he's not stupid, you know what I'm saying. You can tell he's not stupid because he ain't come a run here, like I don't give a fuck, I don't care he's not. He's taking his time, you know what
I'm saying. He's being patient with it. But I'm telling you, if he goes back and watch some of the things he's done over the last couple of years, and then he's gonna be like, you know what, I could do this better. I could handle this level of professionalism and celebrity better. And that's what I want to implore people
to do with him. But also, if you have children, and this is where I want to talk to you a little bit, because you and I have dealt with this with Jackson, I want to implore people to let their children make mistakes young when the stakes are and as high.
Yeah, that's the philosophy that you've taken on. Because for me, naturally being mom, you know, I want to see him about to full. I want to catch him, you know. I want to make sure that they try to get through most of their life unscathed. Right. And I've learned with each son progressively, and it's been a learning process to allow them the space to have some mistakes, for example Jackson, Right. And we can use Jackson as an
example most of the time. It's because he's our oldest and we've gone through the.
Most with him.
And how I would have handled differently this one scenario in the past Jackson has a virtual class that he has to do online, right, virtual math class in order for him to advance because he's so far ahead with math. So we have a meeting with the teacher on FaceTime. Set him up for everything, make sure that he has
everything to set him up for success with this particular course. Now, what it's requiring him to do is to do work outside of the school setting because he could have had the option to go to attend a class in person during this, But who wants to go to some school, right, I'm not subjecting my kid to that. Am not subjecting me to that. I'll put it that way. Okay, I'm not sticking around for you to take a math class in the summer. We're gonna it virtually because why, I'm
also trying to teach time management skills. Old Kadeen after this meeting with his teacher would have been like a hawk, right, Jackson, did you do Jackson? Is this date is assignments due? Jackson? Do you finished? Did you talk to your teacher? And I would have been side emailing the teacher like, hey, where's Jackson in the process with this? That's Kadeen. A couple of years ago, Kadeen now in trying to teach accountability and trying to teach times management and trying to
teach a lesson. Overall, here are all the tools you have to be successful with this course. Every now and again. Hey Jackson, you know, how's the virtual math class going? Okay? Are you all caught up? Everything is good? Help?
Yeah? Thatah?
Yeah we were good.
Yeah, my gosh, gosh, I'm good.
Good. Yeah, I know.
Oh you know if you have problems and stuff, you know you can hit right good?
Got you?
I know you have a free day Sunday. You know you want to put in an hour or two?
No, because I don't need to do that. Almost off, my gosh, I got I got it, I got it.
Fast forward to when the first module is supposed to be over and the teacher sends an email with me cc done it. Hey, you just wanted to touch base because you know, with the end of the module is coming near and out of the ten assignments, Jackson is only completed two of the ten MM. Then she called me as a follow up to the email. Don't have no teacher calling my phone.
That that is your rule.
Don't have to get the email by my phone. But don't be calling and texting me sis because now why I'm looking at my son's sideways because in me trying to be hands off to teach him a lesson, ultimately it taught him the lesson. So now Deval and I have in the conversation with Valda is like a side a side convo with him, like, Yo, what's going on with your math class?
I was very simple. I said, yeah, what's going on with your math class? And he goes, huh. Anytime you ask the kid a direct question and looked them in the eye and looking at you when they first response is hunh, that means they already know that they fucked up. That's what's going on with your math? He first says
to me. I understand it, Jackson. I don't want to hear that because I've heard your mom ask you many times if you needed help and stuff and you dismissed a verson got it in now that his eyes are well en up, So I'm like, what's the matter matter? I'm just upset because my math grade. What's what's your math? I don't know yet, but I missed some assignments. Cool, you're supposed to go to the city championship game for Cardinal Hayes with Jay on Sunday.
Right, Yes, Okay, it's Friday.
If all of those assignments aren't made up, can't go bro Like I'm not I'm not upset at you. I'm You're gonna make mistakes or make poor decisions, so I'm not angry. Your mother is not angry. But there are also consequences for not doing what you're supposed to do, so you're gonna have to find time to make these assignments up before Sunday. He's huffing and puffing. Huffing and puffing. Hey, you can huffing and puff for all you want, but these are the consequences.
I'm not mad.
If you want to go watch TV, we could also go watch TV. If you want to play, we could do that. But you have to decide this young man on Saturday night. No, it's Friday nights. Sits down with me, Dad. Can we go over these two?
All right?
We went over the two, set a scheduled appointment with his tu to Roger, and got six assignments done. The next day early in the morning. He woke up early on a Saturday when he had a long four day weekend and got all the assignments done early in the day on Saturday, and then finished the last one Saturday night. The point of the story is when you allow kids to fail when the stakes aren't as high, they learn
how to maneuver and navigate. Because this same kid, if you'd always been on his back and I made sure the work gets done, and you do this and do that, because I've seen it happen in college. Now you're a freshman in college, and now it's time for eligibility going into sophomore year, and you have a zero point six GPA because you didn't do any assignments. And the only reason why I'm telling this story is because Marcus tells
the story All the time. I watched Marcus coasting. Marcus had a zero point six GPA going into his sophomore year and almost miss camp because he had to take sixteen credits in the summertime.
Oh my goodness, I had no idea.
But since he had to take sixteen credits in the summertime, he was out of shape because he couldn't do summer conditioning.
We get back to camp. What happened.
Marcus gets hurt because his body's out of shape. So with sophomore year was what trash and it all started because he didn't do what he had to do academically his freshman year and try to play catch up more all of the story. Teach your kids how to deal with consequences when the stakes aren't is high, so that when mistakes become high, they don't have to deal with the consequences.
For sure.
You'd rather get a call from a teacher in middle school, yes, then get a call from your child when the dean says he can no longer come to school because he's behaved poorly, or when you see him on an ESPN ticker and he's been kicked out of the league because he's making poor decisions. You'd rather get them conversations when they're in middle school.
And I explain that to the teacher as well too, because I'm also very hyper aware of the fact that my son is a black child. She knows that we're black because we was on FaceTime together, right, yes, And I never want her to feel like, oh, it's just another like black kid that's just not not being supported, not being supported by his family. So that's to his
own devices. So I was very clear and eloquently expressed to the teacher that after the FaceTime Jackson, I had a discussion and I decided to take a hands off approach to teach him.
Tell them what you said to her grade him? How to grade Jackson?
Remember that's I forgot. It was so fewman that I always remember.
You said, listen, do what you have to do.
Grade him accordingly, great according I.
Was like, wow, that's a change, because old black mus be like, don't give him a bad grade.
Let me fix this, or I would have also flown off, which I would have been kept my composer on the phone with the teacher and then flew off the handle, and Jackson would have been like, oh my god, mom. I was very calm with him. I didn't I didn't scream, I didn't yell. It was and sometimes I think they receive it with more, not fear, but almost like, oh shoot, because she's too calm. You know what I mean. I got books wasn't flying, and his wasn't.
You know.
I was very very calm, And I explained to the teacher. I said, I've been explaining to Jackson the importance of time management. I'm trying to teach him accountability and him making a prioritizing his schedule, I said, because he does have a heavy schedule, and I'm aware of that. I said, But in the process, he understands the importance of your class, I said, because you take the time to reach out, and it's taken time out out of your schedule to sit down and call an email and text me to
keep me abreast what's happening. I said, However, I want you to understand that's the lesson I'm trying to teach here. Jackson is fully supported by myself and my husband, I said, but he's also eleven years old, and I'm trying to teach lessons here. And she completely understood. I understand, I said, so baby bear grade him accordingly. And I said, if he gets a poor grade in this class now in the first module, and then he knows, I have to catch up. At least he knows.
He knows.
At least he knows, you know. And I like to shout myself out, but not going crazy on his ask because I really in the past, which I mean, like, what the fuck are you doing? We're not going nowhere this weekend. You can stay to a home and do everything, but we still got on the flight to New York, and he found a way to juggle everything and he understood the work in the process. So it's a win win for me.
And I want to pat myself on the back for helping you get to that point, baby, because there was a lot of times where I was just like Kadem that you're not you're not helping him by one coddling him, but number two being the intersection between him and his teacher and stopping something bad from happening.
Yes, and we.
Can both discuss that because both of our young our sisters extremely young, were both skipped because they were so smart. I think the third child is always the smartest child because they get to watch two iterations of their parents and their siblings. So Torri and Sakari were both extremely
smart and both started school early. Yes, so they both graduated high school early early, but they both also dealt with maturity issues because they were so young going through school that our parents coddled them through the process because they were early. So your parents and my parents helped them, help them, help them then when they got to college, and well, Sakari before college because Sakari went to boarding school,
and then it was time to apply for college. She had no one there to help her with the process.
She was lost.
And because your mom did everything and you helped do everything beforehand, she was lost.
And she I remember coming to our house.
She was like, I have that vague and he said, scary, skary, what do you mean you have nothing?
She said, I have nothing. I have no schools to go to. Everyone's talking about accepted tess and I have nothing, and shut up, shut up? Did you apply? Did you apply here? Did you do this?
No? I didn't know.
I didn't know.
No one helped me. And I was like, see, it's because you were so accustomed to someone always coling. Now you have nothing.
And my sister, my sister was the same way. My sister was pushed through this whole process.
My mom is.
My mom is big on education. She went to school to be an early childhood education teacher. And she she's huge on making sure that academia is number one on our list. So she was on our backs, so make sure this gets done, make sure that gets done. She was the mom who took your book report, ripped it. The Streds did the book report. Then you submitted it, and your teacher would say tell your mom she did a great job, like.
The Ubiquitous Melancholy. Where's that from? No Clue The Cosby Show.
Yes, Yes, Yes, Report, Yes, the Ubiquitous Melancholy.
But then my sister got to college and she struggled because my parents weren't there to help in the process. And then once she got an academic advisor in college, they helped her through the process. But then when she graduated from college, she felt lost again. Imagine and I want to take this back to Jah, right. Imagine being an athlete, right, and you're in middle school and you're nice in middle school, and they're like, oh, we want you to go to this private school. Okay, well the
academics is kind of tough, but we're working. We'll give you a course load that you can manage basketball in this so okay, so y'all gonna pick out my classes.
Cool.
I'm not saying this is what happened with Ja, but I know for a fact when I was at Polyprep, this is what I watched. Yeah, we're gonna help you with this, and we're gonna help you with that, and the kids still have to do the work.
But it's like you're struggling we'll get you a tutor. You know this will get you with that.
So your whole life you're just like, oh, okay, you graduate from high school, you go to college. We have an advisor for you. I know this because I went through this at Hostra. I went to regular Hofta University. I was in the School of Business. I was then in the School of Communication. Some of my counterparts was in New College. New college is away for athletes to get easy grades or they can be eligible to play
NCUBA sports. You graduate with a degree in interdisciplinary studies, your introduce mere stories, your minor maybe art history.
You know what I'm saying.
And I've watched them how they coddled the athlete through the whole process. So, oh, you failed a class. Oh, we'll have you make another one up in the summer. We'll talk to this person. So your whole life, people are moving obstacles out of your way to make sure that you can do what you want. While doing all of this, you're behaving like a child because realistically you don't have to mature. Now you get drafted to the NBA and you're a number two overall pick. You get
thirty million dollars. Then you signed a shoe deal, you have one hundred million dollars. Now you have a total of one hundred and thirty million dollars. You have an iPhone, and you have all the friends that you grew up with in that same environment who were doing childish things in the neighborhood you grew up in.
What do you think to do it on a higher level? Time and the resources to do it on a higher level.
Thank you.
That is the environment that some of these athletes are living in, and it is not an excuse. I'm not saying that we should just let them off the hook. What I'm saying is give these young people time to mature. Since we're watching them in real time. Just give them time to mature, and if they continue to make the same mistakes, then it's like, hey, dude, you've had enough.
It's now as consequences.
We try to tell yeah, brother, we try to tell yah mm mmmm and shout out to me again. I'm just kidding. No. I say that because I'm thinking what made me think about just going back to the story about parents, how different I parent compared to my mom. Initially when I was raising we were like I had Jackson. I remember a time in second grade where he wasn't bringing home his homework. There was confusion. Remember he had that one teacher that was just like, yeah, it was
weird because she used to teach fourth grade. She came to second grade. She wasn't organized Catyle, yes this Catel and Jackson was super confused about what to do, and she was expecting certain things from them that she was used to with her fourth graders, but she was now teaching second grade. As my girl, you have to like work through these things with the kids. And Jackson would come home like Jackson, where's your home or where's this?
And he's like, I don't know, I don't know. He was confused, Yeah, And I was yelling and screaming at him, like you need to bring home yourself like that, because that's what my mom used to do with us. God forbid. We forgot a book at home and we had to test the next day. I mean literally, my mother was like chewing our heads off, livid because she's like, how are you going to prepare for schoolwork? How are you gonna prepare for this test? And you don't have your stuff.
So I did the same thing to Jackson, and I saw like the fear in his eyes, yes, and the disappointment, but also the confusion because he didn't know. So now I'm like, this is a different approach that I have to take, and not just parent the way I saw my parents' parent but parenting in my own style and what I think is going to be conducive to the type of child I'm trying to raise in the type of lessons that I'm trying to teach.
So I think that's a good point because this situation with Job is also something new to everyone because people are saying, like, he should know better on social media. Social media is a very new thing still. It just came out in two thousand and four. Yes, it is twenty twenty three, which means it is nineteen years old, nineteen jobs twenty three, which means Joe was born right
before social media became a serious thing. So everything we're watching now, we're actually learning this is all Like, of course, someone't call it cause a test run. It's a test run in life. It's a social it's yes, it's like a real life social experiment how people act when they have social media. I want to ask parents this because
I also do well. I did social media checks when I had my program Prototype Elite Prototype Athletics in New York, and I huld do social media checks, and the stuff that they see on social media often dictate how they behave on social media.
Because the fed more of that particular thing.
And if the algorithm feeds you what you type in, they create the world. So you think everybody is seeing the same thing you see. So say, for example, go into the strip club and throwing up gang signs and flashing guns. It's all you see because that's all you type up because from a young man, that's all you were interested in because of social media, rap music, other things. Now that you have your own social media and you have actually do stuff, you know what you're gonna do.
Emulate the behavior that you think everybody else is emulating. That's it, you know what I'm saying. That's also the dangers of social media, which is why our children don't have social media. That's why Jackson, who's turning twelve now, I finally allowed him to get an Instagram, but he's
not allowed to have his own Instagram. And his Instagram is linked to my phone, so at any moment I can go on my phone go to his profile, he doesn't have his name on it, he doesn't have any pictures, he's not allowed to share anything, but he's allowed to look up basketball highlights and all this other stuff. So I go to his profile to see the search history, because that's what happens. And then I look at us, making sure like, Okay, he's not watching too much of this,
he's not watching too much of this. He's also looking up this. I also send him motivational stuff. I send him positivity stuff. I send him intellectual stuff, so that it becomes part of his search history.
So there's a little there's a little trick. There's a little trick I'm gonna tell parents.
I go into his Instagram and I look up certain things I like. For example, the last few weeks, I've looked up Confucius quotes, motivational quotes. So now when he looked when he opens up his not his search, his homepage. When he comes on his homepage, he's like, what is this? He doesn't know why it's there. So what I'm starting to do is I'm trying to remember the movie insumption.
When you can plant an idea in someone's head, was like curating his social media world by putting stuff on his page that he didn't even know he was looking for.
And then he'll come to me, Dad, did you know?
No? No, And I'm like, well, tell me about it, and then I'm engaged in his social media world so that we can create it together. And this is why I wanted to talk about the Jah Morant thing as a dad. People are saying, what is his father doing? John Moran's father don't know how to deal with social media.
But also to what I was going to say when you mentioned the whole Jackson thing, we talk about athletes and entertainers being positive role models for the youth, right because what they see is what they're going to want
to emulate. But also too, then there's the where are the parents who are now filtering and buffering what they do see from these entertainers and then making sure that their children know better for lack of a better word, Right, that's interesting that now we can curate almost this world and curate their social media world by having access to their social media if your child does have it, you know, because you know me, I was a hard no on any social media. You will come to the kids and
everything like that. But just's also sorry, because I also understand that Jackson is someone who likes to research, and he likes to investigate things if he's interested in it. So I can see how giving him a little bit of that leeway will make him feel like he's all right part of it. But he's also not understanding that Dad is curating a world for him with his phone.
But here's a crazy thing, though.
Being a hard no for a young person only means that he's going to be a hard know in front of you if you gave your son a phone, or if his friends have access to a phone. I know this because I was a mentor for hundreds of young boys.
There were kids who parents came to me. It was just like, I got this note from the school that so and so I don't want to say names, of course, so and so was involved in some bullying online with Da Da Da da, And it was like, this has to be fake because my son doesn't even have a phone.
I was like, and like, what you mean?
I said, a lot of these kids create profiles on their friends phones. And one of the kids who got in trouble it actually was not him, but he let his friend use his phone and his friend no, not his friend had his own profile on the kid's phone and was bullying other kids. But you know, because of this, it was all like, oh, well, it's his phone, it's him, it's him, it's him. It came from him. And the kid was like, I had no idea that my friend
was doing this. But that also shows you. And then you speak to that kid's parents and mind they all tell you my son's not allowed to have social media, So that hard no only means it's going to be
a hard no in front of you. The best thing to do is to try to curate the experience for your children, especially in the middle school age, because if you think that your children are beyond thinking or talking about sex, thinking or talking about drugs and alcohol thinking, or above thinking talking about violence and bullying, you're wrong. You're wrong. If you if you think that you can ignore it because your child would never do that, you're wrong.
You have to curate the experience so that they understand the consequences with all three and make sure that you're involved, so that they feel adults enough to be like, oh, I'm making a decision with my parents' parents not being told, because when you tell kids not to do this, and you say this, this right here, what's happening. The job is ultimately what happens. They get money, they're on their own.
There's no one to tell them what not to do, because all of the hanger ons and friends are saying, yo, do what you want to do because now you're worth millions and they want to be a part of their lifestyle.
Time.
They gonna let you do it until you self distructed.
Should be lonely, baby, it should be lonely. All right, let's transition into a quick break and then we'll come back for some listener letters. Sound good, Bow bow baby boo. Stick around, y'all. All right, we're back, We back, and let's dive. First of all, I'm a fan of your podcast as well as your book, which I have already read. Great book, awesome, thank you. I also attended your live
podcast in Chicago recently. Great show. Yeah, Chicago was live, y'all live that all our Patreon people will be able to see the live show, So make sure y'all just signed up. I think that was probably my most favorite city this round of Chicago, hands down. Chicago. Was it? All right, y'all? I just want to give you both your Flowers, I appreciate that. I love the message that you both sent out to your fans, with me being one of them. With that being said, I wouldn't ask
anyone else this question. I recently ended a three year relationship, but thinking about a friend with benefits with the same X, there's no punctuation in here, so I'm trying to make.
Sure this person wrote a whole.
At the very end of it, so I'm trying to think where the thought slops. But thinking about a friends with benefit relationship, I guess with this same X, is it ever a good idea to do friends with benefits with an X? I'm just curious about both of your opinions. So if you ended the three year relationship, I can
I guess I'm wondering why. Maybe you guys realize that the relationship situation wasn't working out, but the sex is bombs, so you're just like, you know what, I'll keep you around for some good sex on the side.
This is what I think.
But is there an agreement that y'all have?
That's what I think. I'm not mad at this, and I'm gonna tell you why.
Okay, anyone who chooses to practice safe sex with someone that they trust, with someone that they trust. I applauded, Yes, you know, because I say you have I don't want to say that's a bad term. I was gonna say, say you have an itch you want scratch, that's a bad term. We'll talk about safe sex, but say you're trying to to engage in sexual activity. Why not engage with someone that you you know already and if they
have great sex. You don't want to be out here just trying to jump and soul tied with another person, soul tied with another person. Listen, we know we're not gonna be together forever. We're not working on this long term, so let's just have fun. The only thing that can be an issue with that is that you can't open yourself up to finding true love if you're continuing to be in this relationship with someone.
You understand what.
I'm saying, Like I think, Steve Harvey made this analogy about how he wanted a new car, wanted a new car, wanted a new car, so he kept his old car in the driveway and kept saying, thing, I keep working, but I can't get a new car, and his dad told him, you won't be able to get a new car till you create space for the new car.
So he got rid of the old one.
And when he realized when he got rid of the old one, metaphorically, not only did he get rid of it, he got rid of the mindset that he had a car. So he worked harder to get the new one and ended up getting the new one faster because he got rid of it. I feel like that's kind of the same thing here. You know, you're less likely to go out and find your soul mates or the person that you want to be with for eternity if you're continuing, continuing to conodle and be comfortable with someone else.
Right right, right, right, that's it's actually difference. I didn't think of it that way, like that could impede the process that he finding somebody knew, but that's what's right. But I understand and guaranteed safe good sex is probably hard to find. So you know how I keep this one around.
You know, that's what you get me around.
That's how I keep them around.
Good sex and the American Express.
Oh, good sex and the American Express.
Glad I get married good sex in the American Express.
That's gonna be my next shirt. I'm about to copyright that, so nobody steal that, all right, I'm about to put it on the put it on the Dead Ass podcast page for merch. But yeah, good luck to you, says. Hopefully it works out and both of y'all's favor and hopefully you know he'll be signed up to. Actually, I don't know if it's he or sheet because it didn't specify and specifying. Yeah, but do you think number two?
Hey, Kadeen and Davos. So, I've been dating my boyfriend for about five months now. I love him so much. I see he loves me a lot too. That's good for both of you. I like that for you guys. Uh, But before meeting me, I think he had this picture of the kind of woman he wanted to be with. Were both Christians, but he's more vocal about it and has his beliefs in all. I love to have. Oh, I love to have a glass of wine to unwind
or hang out with friends and have a cocktail. But he doesn't like me drinking alcohol, but I see nothing wrong with it. So I've been trying to stop that, and it looks like I'm trying to settle Oh.
I know where this is going.
I also love to go to parties, like if it's for friends and all. I'm not a party freak, but I love to go with him and he doesn't like to go to places like that. He also is Christian Pentecostal. While I'm Catholic. He doesn't believe in the Catholic faith and tries to make me go into his faith, being Catholic all my life. I honestly don't mind switching when we get married because I should be able to trust his leadership to lead. But it feels off and I
just feel like I'm settling into this life. I'm selling into his life. What do y'all think? I'm a huge fan and I love y'all. We love you to thank you.
Kay you a huge fan, baby. You know. We don't settle over here. That's one thing that we do not do now. Granted, people's relationship with the Lord I don't speak much on because I believe that's a very personal thing. But I don't believe in settling when it comes to a relationship. I don't feel like you should have to give up things that matter to you greatly because someone else is requiring that from you. I'm just not an advocate for that at all. Period.
I don't have to agree when you date. You date to find out if there are synergies. When you don't feel what something feels off, something doesn't feel good, you can either make a choice to work on it because you want to, but to work on it because he wants you to. It's never a good science. That's extremely different. Like Kadeen and I talk about in our book We over Meet the Counter two with approach Getting Everything you Want out your Relationship New York Times bestseller.
We talk about.
We talk about being of service, but not at the detriment of losing yourself. That's very, very important. She said, I feel like I'm settling into his life. I feel like I'm settling into the life I want, and I'm sharing it.
With this woman.
And you're with someone who gives you the latitude to be able to stretch and to grow into that life that you want without judgment. And the worst thing that you could feel is judgment from anybody, much less your spouse.
So I have a question ask you, as a woman, do you feel like you've settled into my life or do you feel like you're living the life you.
Will absolutely not. I don't feel like I've settled into your life. I've settled into the life that I've wanted for myself, that I have envisioned for myself, and I've just been fortunate and lucky enough to do it and blessed enough to do it with someone who I feel like is equally ooked.
And the reason why I ask you because I know oftentimes women say they feel like they have to transform into what their husbands want.
Yes, and the settle into a particular lifestyle, And I mean, I feel that there's moments where I feel like I've lost a bit of kdeen, but not to anyone's fault. It's just the transitions of life, right, going from being a single woman to the now a dating women to the now a person in the committed relationship, then to a wife and then to a mom. There's gonna be ebbs
and flows in life that you have to adjust. But I don't feel like I've, you know, had to succumb to whatever life it is that you helped you had for us as the leader of the family. Because she also mentioned like she's okay with trusting his leadership, which I think I do with you as well too. But then also, I'm never stifled in this relationship by you either or I've never led to be felt or led to believe that I don't matter or my opinion doesn't matter.
It's very much a teammate situation here. So yeah, to answer your question, I don't feel like that. I feel like I'm living truthfully in real time, in real life with where I'm supposed to be.
And I'm glad you brought that up, because even she says like he doesn't like me to do this, He doesn't like me to do that.
He doesn't does he even.
Like you.
Like about each other?
Like like I couldn't. I couldn't imagine being.
It's only five months in two girls. It's giving that you don't know a lot about what's about to unfold here.
Either.
I wonder I wonder how old they are because she sounds young, he sounds very or young. But I can't imagine like being with a girl, and it's being like, well, I don't like did you do this?
Change this? I don't like to do that.
You know what if I got to keep telling you to change stuff, or then I actually get a new girl. I should find a girl that is in alignment with the same things that I'm My mindsetting is alignment with you. Understand what I'm saying as opposed to saying, well, you need to change in order to be with me, And not that he's saying that, but if she's feeling.
That feeling that she said before meeting him, I think he had this picture of the kind of woman he wanted to be with. Baby. If you ain't in the picture, if you're not in the art gallery at all, in the wrong place, you know.
What I feel you.
I feel you you in the wrong places. So I would hate for you to settle. I don't think anybody should ever settle into anything, whether it's love, relationship, career, none of that. So hopefully that's helpful to you. Good luck to you on your road to love. All right, y'all, If y'all want to be featured as a listener letter, keep writing into us. Email us at dead ass Advice at gmail dot com. We'd love to hear from you.
That's D E A. D A S as A D V I C at gmail dot com.
I'm still so cozy here, guys. You know, if you're watching on Patreon, you can see that I am very much at home. You know, still got the stale weaving that y'all saw me in last time. It's okay, no, just kidding, we watched her. But yeah, baby, let's get a moment of truth for you. We're talking today, maturity, we're talking money, we're talking man, the athlete, the person. But furthermore, just what we can do as a society to I guess, help these people, these men, these women,
these people in a certain particular status. It's particular influence through you know, rough times.
It's not just a certain particular person, it's everybody. This is my moment of truth. Just because you watch a person reach a certain economic status, don't expect them to be mature, especially if they're still young.
You know what I'm saying.
Someone can be gifted enough to earn income, well, but that doesn't mean that they're mature enough to understand society. And I think that this happens with professional athletes and entertainers because they become idols quote unquote two people, which I think is also a bad thing.
You should never idolize.
Anyone, Yes, but since when you make someone an idol and they fall short of what you idolize.
You can't blame them.
Allow these young men and young women, especially between the ages of nineteen to twenty five. A lot of these entertainers and athletes become famous and rich very young. Allow them to go through the process of becoming an adult and make mistakes, you know, don't let's not condemn them and hold them to that one or two experience for the rest of their life. We see that all the
time in the world. Someone that you idolize make a mistake, and now they're forty years old and you're still holding them to the mistake they made it twenty three, We got to learn how to let that go.
That was like literally to be most Yeah, it was like allow people in general, a particular people who are of some sort of influence or some sort of fame, allow them to make mistakes and to grow from them. We would hope that nobody, that anybody stays the same whether they're twenty then they go to twenty five to
thirty to thirty five. We would hope that people are able to learn from their mistakes, be able to grow from that, and just have a little bit of empathy because realize too, you're also making mistakes as well, and you just don't have the spotlight on you. So it's easy for you to duck off into the you know, the corner, yeah, because you don't have a spotlight on you.
But it's that much harder, particularly for our young men and women who are given these large sums of money or given this spotlight and don't really necessarily know how to navigate it. So let's just try to be a little bit kinder to people in general. I know we say that a lot when it comes to just social media and a lot of the topics that we've discussed.
But piling on to a situation that's already facts, you know, fact negative or not you know, viewed in high regard, is not doing anything good and then find lessons that you can also as a parent teach your children from things like this. So hopefully this episode was helpful to y'all for that reason with a lesson.
Oh one more thing too, can we stop equating blackness with struggle, poverty, and violence? Like I think that we have to stop saying that once someone behaves in a certain way that shows violence or poverty or some sort of undisciplined thing, is.
Oh, they're trying to be too black. Blackness is not one thing. Right.
You can be excellent and be black, you know what I'm saying. You can be smart and be black. You can be articulate and be black. You can be wealthy and be black. Blackness is just not one thing. And the reason why that bothered me and I wanted to
say this is because Jahn Morant is acting. He's a young man who's acting like what so many other people act like the rappers, you know what I'm saying, Especially drill rap is huge right now, right, but white people do the same thing, Asian people do the same thing India. People Hip hop is a global phenomenon now. So when you see people acting in a certain way, don't just say, oh, they're trying to act or be black, right, because that's not the only way to be black. And I want
to make sure that we're clear on that. And then also that Jah Moran is not going to be the only wealthy young man to make mistakes that part, you know, So prayers and positive healing energy goes out to him and his family. I can guarantee you he going to thrive through this and be better. This is not the first athlete to go through stuff. I remember when Alan Ivers was going through all of this. I remember when Chris Carter was going through all this, and that was
in the eighties. Chris Carter was going through all of this stuff with the drugs and the fights, and he got kicked off the Eagles, and that was the best thing. When he got cut by the Eagles and went to the Vikings. That's when he became a Hall of Famer because the consequences showed him that he had to change just behavior.
That's what even think about the kids that the kids just now in the University of Georgia after they won the championship.
Championship, that's college level. You know what I'm.
Saying, that those actions may impede them from making it to the big leagues. And it's just like, you know, let's just try to rally around these kids, yes, and teach these lessons before it's too late. Yeah, all right, y'all. As usual, you can find us on Patreon. Shout out to everyone who is signed up to see exclusive dead Ass podcast video content. Also some exclusive from de Vo's man Cave and some family content as well too.
Yo.
The Patreon Patreon circuits popping off pat re.
Read the comments we got work. Be patient. I'm gonna be honest to y'all.
Are so used to getting stuff quickly on because of the podcast, But Patreon is different. The videos have to be edited, sound has to be corrected, color has to be corrected. Yeah, we want it to be perfect, so it comes out a little bit slower.
But rock with us. We got it coming for sure or for sure out to Josh.
Yes, yes, yes, ganggang, they got us holding us down.
Okay, yes.
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