Live! In New York City

is the term that we say every day. So when we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts, the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Were about to take Phillow Talk to a whole new level. Dead ass starts right now. Yeah, what's up, y'all? Y'all look good, I can't see ship. I'm lying. Everybody come out on the stage. The first thing they said, Yeah, look good, Right, I can't see nothing. We outside though I haven't been on stage since two thousand and nineteen. I ain't gonna lie.

I'm nervous. I just got done filming. Yes, who watch your sisters? Yeah? Yeah, y'all, my sisters PU your favorite character. Hey, so I know, I know, I know I know, I know, I'm know y'all want to know when's the team is coming out? Right? I can't tell y'all, but I will tell you all this. We just got done finished rapping season two. Yes, so we already filmed two seasons as a team of shout out Tyler Perry Studios BT for doing all that good stuff, but without any further ado. Hey, hey, hey, y'all,

don't be capt calling my wife. I know that's why y'are here. She's a real star. She is a real star. So I'm gonna need you to get on y'all feet because coming to the stage, the queen be wife of not one, not two, not three, but four whole boys, the baddest being all of Brooklyn can't care. Damn you know what was hand me crying back there? I'm not supposed to. I cried enough for the past week, y'all with this tooth when I tell y'all debilitating pain like I had four whole boys, as you know, two of

them at home, no pain meds. But that too took me out. But I'm here. I'm here to see I eat you everyone, y'all. How you feeling about this pony tail? So Janelle my hair stylish shout out to Janelle. I was like, girl, what are we gonna do about this here? She's like, I'm thinking we're doing nice, slick ponytail. Let's go with this dress, you know, because I was thinking New York City cabaret, feel close to Broadway back home, and I was like, you know what, give me a braid,

but make it long and dutty. So, Senior, this is the best part of the Brave right here. Why do you just added this to the Brave? God, I love you. Just a little razzle dazzle, you know, a little function. So as you all know who here listens to the to the podcast? Anybody here listen to the Boggle A So on the podcast, we have two different jobs. Okay, she does all the work. I don't prepare at all. I'll just be talking. She keeps me like on schedule.

So what's next? I don't know. So we're back home, y'all, So everybody knows that we're down in Atlanta. Now anybody from Atlanta area? Okay, okay, how about Queens the Bronx oh le Brons head deep that's cut Harlem uh Staten Island. Who I guess I guess anybody from I guess Manhattan, New York City. Okay, at you Oh Jersey okay, Jersey, Okay, okay, okay, anybody traveled from the New England area, like Connecticut or anything Connecticut. Okay, now time for the thoroughist borrow. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

boo your way. Yes. I love that. I love that. I love that, I love I love of being from Brooklyn. From being from Brooklyn, what are the things that you miss about Brooklyn now that we're down in Atlanta? Because I don't claim Atlanta, people be like, oh where you from? Even now, I'm still like, I'm from Brooklyn. I live in Atlanta. But um, I think the best way to put it is that I am now like, I guess,

a Georgia peach, but I have an Apple Core. You know, My core is Apple Baby all day, every day Brooklyn. I'm a big it up wherever I go. So where do you miss the most? Bacon, egg and cheese? Bacon, egg and cheese. And I missed the fact that you can always find a Jamaican spot to get some curry ox tails extray it. They don't ever have gravy though Jamaicans, and they charge you two dollars, tell gravyes, after charge you candy dollars for a large and you get beer rice? Right,

beer rice? Yeah, I would say that. Um. What do I miss the most out here? Our family, because you know, our families all still here. Um. But I like that we're in Atlanta now versus Callie because it gives us a little bit more accessibility. I kind of feel like we're at this midway point between getting took and then accessing accessing l a if we have to. So, I

mean that's a good thing. I do miss my corner store, bodega, you know, hero things like that, Um, and just how convenient things are because in Georgia stick closed early and you can't find what you want when you needed wow early, wow early wild. So what's that what you want to talk about today? You know what I don't miss? What don't you miss? Alternate side of the street park Yo? Every morning my long ago got a circle and were

the crowd heights. Yeah, so we had alternate side of the street parking Monday, Tuesday, Thursday, Friday, Yo, and the streets still be. I don't miss that. I don't I don't miss that at all. That is a fact It's funny because when I come back now, I feel like Brooklyn is almost like unrecognizable. Yeah, gentrification is real. What was the first sign that you knew that things were taking the turn white? Were my white people? That any white people are here? Any white people so dead? Ass?

Ain't where we go gentrification? No, I'm not gonna blame you. She pushing her stroller with her baby, or maybe it's the jamaking nanny pushing her stroller. Let me, let me, let me explain something to y'all. Thought. So white people claim to be afraid of black people until they got to move into black neighborhoods or everything. So where we moved to Crown Heights, I'll never forget it. Son. We came back from Detroit, which is also placed as got a lot of black people should be sucked up. So

we moved back. I was playing ball. We was broke, right, we was broke. We moved back to an apartment. Conine is a house baby, so she grew up in a private house. Her parents coddled her. She never really got on the train. I'm just speaking fast. That's like I have no situational awareness or anything. I did. You did, you didn't do you want me to tell stories about that? We got a car broken into the first night we stayed in the Crown Heights. Why because Cadine left her

product bag on the front seat. Why were they touching my ship? That's my face, it's my car, it was my bag. Why are you touching my ship? No? No, don't touch my ship. Listen. We moved back the first day. We've seen the yellow tape. When you see the yellow tape, you see the little orange beads on the floor. Was like, oh my god, what do you think happened? I'm like, I don't know. Just take your liss inside. That's what

we moved back to. This was two thousand and nine, right New York Avenue between Deanenberg and y'all remember the apartment right, That's where we shot all the videos with the kids. That's where it all started. Y'all. I kid you not. I kid you. Not a bunch of dudes outside they're chilling doing what they do. Because this is the biggest thing about the Hood. People need to understand. The hood is safe. It's safe. People just don't like being disrespected. That's all it is. Think about it. When

when I grew up, my dad right. Shout out to my pops, Troy Big mentoring Flatbush. We went to sell the Missionary Baptist Church. Shout out to my boy just we grew up together. That was an album, All Road Driveball Don't Stop at All, Arizona, Alabama. Yes, the songs about it. It was fucking dangerous to people on the outside, right, But all of the guys that people were afraid of. You could walk around there and it's just, hey, how you doing. What's up? Boss? Oh that's Troy Son. You

know what I'm saying. When you know your people in your neighborhood, they just want to be respected. And you know, me and k Wild walk around there. These white people were walking there, have they strollers and their dogs, and they'd be walking and I'm like, this ain't gonna go well because they don't know the protocol. There'd be a bunch of guys sitting on the car and they're like, hey, buddy, can you get off my hood. I'll be like, come here, let me talk to you real quick. Don't don't call

nobody buddy. That's automatic disrespect, all right, call them chief, never call them bro. Okay, don't call him buddy. And he was like, this is my property. I can do what I want. Fine, go back over there. See see, But there wasn't scared. Now they outnumber us, and I ain't gonna lie to you. This is an up pear opinion. But I don't have a problem with gentrification. You want to know why, I'm gonna tell you why. I'm gonna tell you why we as a people got smarter. Right.

You know who will also getting involved with gentrification? Black people. I brought property, did anybody else? Not my property? We gotta evolve people. If there's one thing I'll tell you about about us as a people, I feel great about empowering the people that I grew up with. Right. I feel great about working with DJ right partnering. It's not my employee. Were partnered together genell power, empower justin empowered all the people that work with us, that all our partners.

We don't employ each other, we partner together. If we as a community of people start to do that together, we can all come up. That's what I want you to think about. There's one thing I want you all to remember about Dead Ass Podcast. Yes, we like to make jokes, but this is a safe space to grow. This is a safe space to think outside of the box and say, wait, how can I be better today

than I was yesterday? And if there's one thing I want you all to leave here with, it's that feeling of you know what, I want to be better tomorrow. So as we get on with the show, I want you to think about God, laugh, have a good time, drink and eat, but think and ask yourself how can I be better tomorrow? So, yes, you keep me on track because you know I'll talk all day. Hold that thought. We have so much more to say, but not before we get into these ads. Will be right back, y'all.

So how many couples do we have in the house tonight? All right? See, I'll made this a cute little date night situation. Love that? How about my singles? So based on the tone of that that yell, it was what the singles ain't playing right now? Hold on, wait, but the tone of it. You're the single man, yo, You win it right now? Bro? You tried. That's my brother, my brother in law, Tristan Brow. Yes, so we have one single man in the house to night. You're the

smartest You're the smartest guy in the world. Listen, if I was single I was I was single, I would go to places like Essence Best. I would go to places like dead Ass Podcast, Live Talk, because you know you're gonna see some beaut a full intelligent young women or old women, no disrespect people been looking for old has now been dubed like Auntie Fest? Is that the real that's the t now? Right? Well? I rebuked that because I like Essence Fest and I ain't nobody Auntie

Like am I teetering on Auntie age? I'm nervous. Didn't come on sign? Come on sign? We we got four kids? So what that mean? Okay? This this is how I knew I was getting old, right this song I was getting old. I was reading the meme and they said thirty years ago, right, and automatically I'm thinking seventies, you know what I'm saying. And then it was like thirty years ago, like that was bro turn on Nights were in elementary school. I was the elementary school brod to

turn on Niken Knight. And you see shows that you see when they first came out that day as the old school show. Now you're like, I'm oh, I will tapen though I'm not even gonna lie. I definitely so We're gonna have some fun with y'all tonight, right. You know, you love to listen to the podcast and you hear Divine Line do a lot of talking. But with the shows that are live, we haven't been live since two thousand actually, she was having twenty February. We had our

last live show in Atlanta. So we'd like to be interacted. We'd like to get you actual seats. We'd like it to be a different experience than y'all listen to us talk whole night, because you can do that typically on the podcast. Who've been listening to the season of the podcast. Yeah, anybody have a favorite episode so far? Yesterday's what was yesterday's Now, I was in paint Chouse. I don't remember, oh wo. He was just talking about that Grannie's house.

House in Grannie's House, that was talking about finances, making those decisions. For the embeddment for those of you who don't know what the episode was, it's pretty much based on the idea that we as a people don't understand our value and our property. So for example, you'll have a property that's been passed down from generation to generation to generation, and most people would be like this house don't got no mortgage. We're gonna live in it til we die and pass down to our kids. But you

don't realize that that property is now an asset. So if you inherited this house and there's no mortgage, and now the houses in Crown Heights for example, and it's seven figures, if you sell that property and you use the capital from that property to buy multiple properties, now you can turn that one asset into multiple assets. And rather than thinking about the the mindset of I'm just gonna hold onto this for sentimental value, why not use

that house and create generational wealth. So that's what the whole episode was about. Yeah, that was a good one. That was a good one. So lots of good things happening this season. Deval and I will let you guys in on a little secret. I guess we can tell them about what we have coming out February. So we've been working diligently on a book. Yes, so you guys

hear it here. First, we are aiming for release maybe around Valentine's there, So yeah, so we're looking for Valentine's they release, and um, what would you say is the main overarching topic of the book, because we didn't want it to be UM too self healthy. We didn't want it to be a how to because you guys, know one will say it over and over again. Although we don't take it lightly that people look at us and

feel like we're that hashtag relationship goals. We're just sharing our experience with you guys, so people can just take what they want from it. What you can relate to, you can which you can't, you can't UM, And we just want to share a little bit more about our story. So I know a lot of people feel like they know so much about Val and I and our story, but there's some stuff that we've never spoken about publicly

that we are now putting into this book. So I'll say, it's a nice recap of a Brooklyn loved story and how we evolved over the years. And UM, it's going to take you from the very beginning up until about when we were married and had our first child. So we got to leave room for like a book number two or three or you know, so we're excited for that coming up in uh February. Yeah, yeah, So we want to get y'all up and out your seats, get

y'all moving and shaking a little bit. Yes, when I spoke to Trible, Triple called me like two days ago. Our producer shout out to Triple, I had she I heard she had, y'all with the pre show talking and talking, you always hear about Triple on the podcast. You got to actually meet her in the flesh first. The first thing I said when I seen your shirt mad gay,

She was like, say gay on it. So then the reason why I said that is because I want people to realize that that's podcast Live shows a safe space for everybody. We live in the town now where if you say the wrong thing or have an opinion, you get canceled or you get ridiculed. But we all have to start to challenge each other. Right if we all think the same way, how can we grow If we're all programmed to just believe in one thing, how can we have a different person spective and be a better person.

So the reason why we like to do things this way is because we're not experts. I think that we can learn from a lot of the people that's out here. So we want to invite some of you guys up here play some games so we can learn some different perspectives. But what I ask is that when people give their comments or their answers, let's all shower them with love and respect, no judgment. No judgment is allowed at all. I don't care how crazy it sound, because sometimes we

get some crazy answers. Have y'all listened to listening letters, Yes, sometimes, no matter what they say, please give them respect. Absolutely. So when I spoke to Triple, I said, she she called me and She's like, girl, I'm trying to do this little game situation. And we have not one single man that wrote in to be a part of the game, not one in New York. So we'll see what it's

looking like in Philly and DC. But we figured returned New York into something couple style, all right, So to be prepared, let me pull out my cards now because I got some some information on here. So pretty much we have three couples that we've selected. I think you guys wrote in submissions to dead as podcast, and I'm going to start reading little blurbs about who the couple is, so once you hear it, you might know who you are.

And I will introduce you, guys, and we will want you to make your way to the side of the stage over here and we'll bring you around back, all right, ready, ready to have some fun? Yeah, all right, y'all, here we go. Today is our fifth year wedding anniversary. We got married on eight eighteen seventeen. That year was a roller coaster to say the least. My father passed away

just fifty eight days before the wedding. Oh wow. And my husband really stepped out of his comfort zone as a minister to make me smile on that day and decided to wrap his vows after we said the ones with the pastor and it went by ye roll. The things the man will do to make his woman smile are priceless. We've been through so much throughout marriage, having a stillborn, a baby with a heart defect, all while trying to remember why God brought us together in the

first place the few first years. We're trying. But we're so happy today that we'll be eight making it to our fifth year, which I hear is an accomplishment in itself, sure as hell is. We are so blessed to be able to say that we are the one for one another. After all. Welcome to the stage, y'all, Keyana and Reggie, all right. Next. We met in January of nine, So that's about what thirty years ago on his first day of middle school in E s L class. We were

both twelve years old and both from Haiti. Shout out to Haiti, all right. I came to the US a little earlier than him in August of and I was assigned to help him learn English as I was the only person that spoke real even though I was still learning the language myself. We basically taught each other how to speak English. We got to know each other and found out we were both born in November same year, two weeks apart, and a lot more shocking similarities. So

we became really close as friends. Right. We were all so good friends from then and got involved with each other on and off, but never in a relationship due to him quote unquote wild in these streets. Those his word. He said, it was his words. He was wilding in these streets because he would he not want to relive those times. You go bring that, but we always said maybe later on in life, if time permits, or if the streets shut down. Right, covid the reason why he's married, y'all.

He was at home like this, and we calmed down, and we're both still single, then we would date, and that's exactly what happened. Covid kidda. We're now thirty four years old, married for nine years. On August thirty one, seven year old baby girl come to the stage, Eddie and Marie. All Right, our love stories started shockingly through Twitter millennials, so Twitter's real space. I never believed I would meet my future wife on social media. But life is crazy. I always look when I get it from

the meal perspective, I always said on the show. She followed me first on Twitter, and then I followed back, as we were both in the journalism industry. I'm a sports anchor and at the time, she had just started her first job as a TV news reporter. Yes, I saw her tweet about I saw her tweet about Last Chance You, one of my favorite series, and I said to myself, Oh, if she likes Last Chance You, then

she must be dope. That led me to sliding in her d. M Oh, they definitely millennial, yo, but on some friend mentor type vibes right, let me help you, sis um. So we had so much in common just wrapping about our careers and families. I wasn't even checking for her like that. Lies. I can't wait to see this guy? What do you look like? Full story short? A few weeks ago, A few weeks go by. A few weeks go by, and we stay in contact and we're starting to we started talking more and more as friends.

And then one night we spent more than six hours on the phone until six a m. Man. Yes, we got out that friends real quick ahead, and it was then we knew we were in love. You guys, the rest is history. Give it up, y'all for madisone and Christ bring Chris in the middle. The middle, Chris said, I want to be your friend. I wasn't interested at all coming that was the plan? No like adorable? How old y'all y'all live like us in college? Literally actually right.

I never looked at her once and said I wanted to be a friend. Not one time in my life did I ever say I just want to be a friend. That wasn't take your line? You, what do you say ahead of the prospects, I won't even check it for her like that? What do you say that he was checking for me? You're checking for me on the FaceTime for six hours? Did your row? Now we get the truth? Now you get the bro, I ain't mad at you. I'm not mad at you at all. Nobody Now you're

congratulation engatulations. That's the thing you learned, right, how the love story starts. Don't even matter it don't all stuff? You happy? That's it? You know you have got the key. Could be cousins though, huh, you're and Chris could definitely be cousin's. Get out of the friend zone. That's the key, gentlemen. If well, there's no single gentleman, Christan, did you learn anything today? Be better tomorrow today stay out of the friend zone, my brother. All right, So here's how we're

gonna work it. Maybe we'll tell Josh how he wants us to stand. But each couple, we'll be sitting back to back with a marker and a note pad. Deval and Cadeen, that's us triple definitely give it up for trible. Yeah, yes, as a step on my pony too. Devalcanti will ask the women and the men questions respectively, allowing them to

answer for what their spouse would say. Each player will write down their answer without consulting with their spouse or fiancee in this case, to see who knows their partner best. Each player will have fifteen seconds to answer. A timer will go off when their time is up. W's where's my paper? That's adorable. I feel like it's a photo moment. Yeah, I love it. Do you want to ask some questions? Well, you gotta ask the gentleman, and I'm going to ask

the women. Okay, sounds good, sounds like a plan. I was gonna want to ask the sex questions took ahead? How we already know where he'd be at with you make it seem like, well, I think about his sex. I think about money too than one dimension. All right, you want to ask your question first? All right, here's the first question. You have ten seconds to give an answer. All right. If the answers match, the team gets a point.

The team with the most point questions score, the team score. Sorry, alright. One thing you also learned about marriage? Your wife gonna give a shit if you're talking, She's just gonna talk over you. That was gonna portant part. I didn't want to miss it. How thank you sis. Look my friend over and talking to that goddamn trying to help you out. So look, let me show you have something on right. You know why they think about that who's keeping score? Why?

Because the team with the most points don't win nothing. Y'all worried about the thing. He's know what I'm saying, all right, it's bragging rights for me, all right. Pressure question number one? How many times a week would your partners say you have sex? You better write that number bigger. You're writing that number mask, You better write that number bigger. We're you gonna start with the couple number one. I

ain't trying to sleep on the couch. You ain't trying speaking, all right, tread lightly number one, Turn around and show the audience your answer. Now the times. Hey, you're a smart man because you're trying to get something tonight, he says every day, Josh, I can't stand up here, Josh. Couple number two, number two, we got Eddie and Marie two times a week. Let me explain something to y'all. They learned how to speak English together. They two weeks apart.

He is, motherfucker's know how many times they having sex? It's like telepathy. You look at her and now whispering and creole over here. Neither I'm listening for cheating, okay. Couple number three zero, he's still the friends on guys, he was lying, he was lies. Or maybe her parents might be watching, like your parents are here and she's waiting for marriage. How about that? You know what, Maybe

that's what it is. Alright, I'm getting points. You can rip that off, all right, Go ahead and rip that page off from you, or just put it behind you. There you go, So couple number one, and I'm gonna raise the stinks everybody up here. A drink, drink, drink, drink. You only have one drink. Whoever wins drinks on me for the rest of the night. Okay, that's fair, that's fair. We went from nothing to drinks. That works, all right. You want me to ask a question from here? That's

a question, all right, we'll change it up. A bab will change the speed. If you were riding in a car with your spouse and their mother, who would your spouse want to sit in the front? And I guess this is a question for the guys, right, isn't your wife or your mom for the guys? Or your mom? Is your wife or your mom sitting in the front? Couple number one, turn your answer around and three two one? Mother sick in her feet like she has a lot of things okay, let me, let me, let me just

because I hear the cloud, shut it off. This is the point of the game. If both of them agree, it don't matter what y'all think. That's a relationship in marriage for you as long as they agree. Who are we right, oh, wife and my brother. Let me tell you a funny story. Let me tell you all the funny story about my mom. All right, my mom, you should sit in the front of my car. Because both my mom and my wife are very similar. They both like to be of service. They don't want to be

any problems. When Cadine became my fiance, I kid you not. My mom went to the back and said to me, you always put your wife in the front, and my lion, sure, I did one thing to that also, will never let me do as per His mom is walking on the outside of the decided by the street. So yes, couple three. Okay, you said wife before mom? Yeah, so his wife. Yeah, he's a very complicated I'm starting to like the Strada defense. No, you get a point, you get a point, Yes, good job,

good job. Won't point here at one point. At one point from Madison and christ All right, go ahead, baby, all right? If your spouse had to give you a report card? What sex position? Would she give you? An A plus four? We're talking about the tricks, all right. I'm interested to see what Madison gonna say. See she have sex zero times a week, so I'm interested to see what they asked. Are gonna be over there, says

mother Mary over here. Okay, I smell cap now, I smell somebody capping over there, because I see her face. When I asked the question, she was like, whoa, all right? Got you Keana and Reggie? What we got? Number one? Oh? Don't you stass? He put two questions, though he put two answers, Babe giving head and back shots. Kay, look who we go? We wo Yeah, we'll take that. Give him two points couple number two bagshots. But her laying flat, it's like they down. That's that's the one. Is that

the one that's gotta be flat. She gotta be flat down. She gotta be flat down. But with the ass respects? Got you? Okay, well two respects. That's because that's your wife. But I get it. I understand you engage. We've been there as well. We've been there. Sure give him two points two over here with the friend zone zero over here? Hold on, hold on, Madison, what you say? Ready? Turn? Madison said, this is hypothetical. Guys, she's gonna lie and

talking about a hypothetical hypothetical doggie style. It's your mom here too? Where is her mom? She's definitely here? All right, So everyone gets a point. Everyone gets a point. Very nice, nasty, nobody said, missionary? Al right? Next question, Next question, where twist the lizard luck? Who remembers that video the wheel barrow twists the lizard luck? That was a good one, all right. If you gave your spouse a whole pass, what celebrity or who were? Which celebrity would they use

it for? So women were I'm asking you this, ladies, if you were to give your guy a hall pass to be with a celebrity, who would he pick? Yo? Tom out? Tom out? Let me explain something to you about this guy right here? Hold on. When when Kay asked the question, he said, he's sweating over here. Poor Reggie, you were vet in this fucking game. You're gonna laugh, all right. Reggie's He's like, this is my fifth wedding anniversary. Y'all got me underpression. Poor Reggie's over here, sweating, y'all.

Al Right, Reggie, that baldy shining, shining, all right, all right, all right, I take Rihanna any day anybody else? Baby baby one. All right, Reggie, you're gonna get you. That's the only way she gets the hall pass if it's Jesus. I like the way you think, Reggie. I like the way you think. Couple number two, I canna say real quick? Oh, Tracy Alice Ross, Okay, wait, how do we do it? Was it he he would pick or who she would pick? He would pick? Right? Yeah, yeah, I got you ready?

All right? Sheila Marie's wife's wife. They know Sheila Marie. Wherever you are, Eddie, about the bis is if he gets a hall task, just so you know, sis alright? One point over here, Couple of number three, Megan, Megan, goodgod, that neither I'm either all right happy looking at points? Do we need to leave treble the soul mates? It's a three way time, two way time. Alright, alright, let's keep going and let's keep going. All right, let's keep going. How would your spouse rate your sex drive on a

scale from one to ten? Y'all laughing? Let me be honest with y'all right, listen, listen, listen, niggas be tired. Time I was in college, a pile drive. Kay, Now we got four kids. Okay, you get six minutes tops if you If you don't get yours in six minutes, don't even look at me if you know what it is. I'm about to turn forty soon. Okay, I have nothing

to prove anymore. I'll be honest. I ain't being honest. Okay, I don't care the ship you're still on TV, Zach Zach can do all that ship in the blue shower by the time I get home from doing that. Say, y'all know that blue light and the shower scene is how Dakota got here. Dakota I sold out blue lights on Amazon. Everybody was buying them up. I'm like, hey, you know when art imitates life? Alright, Couple number one three two one go low three, low three. They're on

the same, They on the same. I respected that's honest. Yes, I ain't mad at it. Couple number two, well, I'm hearing I'm here in judgment out in the streets, I'm hearing that's my talking about y'all. Look at my man with my missing and he said, he's at eight with y'all think I'm still thoroughbread out here with something chilly with something couple number three low two. They knew you could tell they new in the game. They they don't know.

They ain't listening to the questions. Wait, so what did y'all think was gonna they arguing already y'all don't get no points. So what did they think? You thought that your sex drive you were writing down or his? So he's a five and yours is hers is a two? Oh, and y'all are't married yet. Damn y'all starting off on the low end. Man, leave the judgment at home. It's not judgment. Don't. Don't. Just speaking from experience. I'm gonna

tell you, gentlemen, where where my gentlemen? Listen? Listen to me right When when I was in college, I used to be trying to go forever right and Kail used to be like, stop, okay, nobody want to be doing this ship all night? Are you done? I thought this is what she wanted and she was like no, no, no, And then tho some kids into the mix. Forget it, forget it. I all got no judgment for nobody. Make sure you get yours man and he get his last question.

All right, last question, and then we'll see how we are with tides and whatnot, and then we'll have a tide break around. Okay, let's see. Let's pick a good one here. Let me see why the questions you have left? If you have a better question history questions here? Oh, this is the one? Which one the first one? Yes? Oh, a matter of fact, we're gonna do this isn't for any gender and specific? Who said I love you first? And where? And where? Don't be nervous, girl, don't be nervous.

Couple number one, who's in the lead, Trouble one? Two or three? One is in the league? These two tables down here, be on everything, y'all be on everything. One is on the least. So pretty much just for the game. If they get it right, they win the game. All right. If not, we'll tide break around it. Come on, redge go who she said me via text and he said me my birthday at the next game? Who's right? Who was right? You don't remember? She don't remember? Broken? What

would you do that? No? No, she was drunk a lot in the beginning of the relationship. Puble Number two all right, I understand you under It was a good time, wasn't it. Yeah? Number two, both of them said, And so when they getta half a point, they're gonna have a point. So they're gonna have a point. Okay, half a point for Marie and Eddie. Couple number three. Chris, Wait, wait a second, come for rd Come forward, come for Chris said, for y'all in the back. You can't see it.

Chris said, me on the side of the bed. After we had sex, No, no, no, before before girl, I love you. Yeah, so I said, I love you. I did this poem and everything, and then it was on you know what I'm saying. Well, I ain't gonna say what I did, but you know it's not either pussy and everything and everything. She said, no, she said, nobody did it like you this before. That's how you got off THET zone. That's how you got off the first zone. But he said, sitting on the side of her bed.

Then we had bad sex, or then we had sex. Okay, I said bad sex. They don't sound like that sext to me. Can we give all about couples around them? Aploys? So who was in the lead? Because I feel like we should have a dance off for the person who if there's a tie, there's no ties, there's no ties. There's no ties to everybody one everybody, So triple, what are they getting? Come? Come, Triplet? She just gave him

something that ran away. They got tickets to Um Dougie Fresh tomorrow here at Sony Hall, back to back date nights, y'all got. Y'all got participation gifts, So thank you just for participating, because it's not easy to get up here and be this honest with a group of people to give him a round of the floor. All right, before you keep going, let's stop for a quick second. We're gonna go pay some bills. We're gonna be right back, so hold that thought. We're gonna get to our favorite

part of the show, which is listener letters. This is where we're gonna let you guys ask the questions and we're going to discuss what you guys want to discuss. How y'all feeling so far? Yeah, I'm really enjoying this time with y'all, Like I really really am. This is it's it's so good to be back on stage. I mean, Nika took my water to you can have some of mine. There you go, Brian, Brian brother, get his asked, Brian.

Thanks all right. So I feel like we have a wordless mike like ours that we can probably pass through to you guys if someone has a question, Oh, trouble, trouble, there's trouble right there with the mic. All right, So let's dive in. Anybody got a question, don't be shot. Don't be shot like anybody, don't be had so much to say when the couple was up in here, you'll be writing in to that at gmail dot com. We promise we're not going to judge, y'all. Hello, you know,

help me, help me? Oh god, girl. So I haven't been on the dating scene in a minute, you know, but from what I'm here, it's trash. Yeah, it's trash. Access pool, oh a pissie pool, time out, time out, flying in traveling. There's no men in here to to give their opinion because all the women are saying is trash. But I can't even argue because they ain't even know men in here. So I get it. Act. This is

me and Kay actually talked about this, right. It's funny the dynamic in life that happens like throughout ages right. For example, remember when you were in high school, the popular girls went after who the older guys, Right, They went after the older guys, and then the guys who are their age, they kind of looked down on them. Right. The older guys dragged the popular girl through the mud through all that time. Right, the same thing happens in

your twenties. The popular girl in your twenties, what do they do? They go after the ball players, the entertainers. They want, you know, they want to go on trips and do all this other stuff to do that is broken, ain't got no money. He's kind of left on the side until he builds his resume to be able to do the same things. Right, and then when he gets the chance to do that in his thirties, what does he do? Goes back to the twenties. And it's a cycle.

It's a perpetuating cycle that's happening because I feel like a lot of people are looking for instant gratification and not looking to build. K and I built everything together. I was broke. He didn't have nothing either, and we dealt with each other and all of our bullshit and trauma together, like seriously. And the rea the reason why I say that is because you may think the dating pool is trash because the guy you're talking to is trash.

But if we're being honest, we probably would have considered our situations while we were dating to be trash if we listened to everybody else during that time. You know what I'm saying. I wasn't perfect, She wasn't perfect. We were trying to figure it out. I just think you have to learn how to give people grace and uh ask yourself, who are you choosing to date? Because if you keep dating the same person over and over and over again, at some point it ain't that person or

those people, is you? You know what I'm saying. And that's that's men and women. That's not just one thing, you know. But I think for us, the advantage that we had because guy said, we haven't been in this dating scene in a long time. But the advantage that the val and I had is that when we met and started dating, Like, of course, we knew each other since elementary school, but when it came down to actually dating, we didn't do that until college. And we were eighteen

and nineteen years old. We were babies, and we thought we knew it all. We had it all figured out, and we thought we were grown and um, I remember my mom de Vos mom being like, slow down, who were you as a person? Who are you as an individual? Um? But the advantage that we had at the time was that there wasn't much social media. We were young, and

there weren't much egos. I think you have that eighteen nineteen twenty year old invincibility where you're just like, well, whatever, we're gonna do whatever, We're gonna see how it goes. We're gonna see how And we talked about a lot of this too in our book that's coming out, because it was a way for us to really grow together.

And we came from a place where we were kind of a learning life at the same time simultaneously and at the same time giving each other grace, So we weren't really we didn't have too many life experiences separately or together to really judge each other by. We didn't have, um a lot of outside noise like, for example, social media now and all of the distractions that are out there. We really just were organically and authentically growing together almost

as babies. So I think that's the advantage that we did have, and that I think that's something missing with this particular generation with dating is because people are showing up not as themselves but as representatives of who they are. And if more people were showing up as their true, authentic selves and being honest from jump and being transparent about what they're looking for about who they are, then it will be a little bit easier to connect with

someone who genuinely likes you as a person. So we could put down the facades, we can put down who we think this person wants us to be, who we think society needs us to be, and really connect with someone without that um. So that's important. I think that's what's missing from the generation. So to answer your questions, this um, show up as who you are, and your person is going to find you. It may not be in your time, it's gonna be in God's time, and

it'll happen. It'll happen. It'll happen. You know you you find and ship. But sometimes I get lost just listening you talk like you're kind of smart. Sometimes sometimes you know you. I agree with you, though, Like, don't just go to one place, go different places, try church, try sports ball, go on vacation, don't get stuck in the same spot, because if you're finding the same people in the same spot, then you're going to keep doing the

same thing over and over again. Just travel, travel, Just do as much as you can to be the best version of yourself, and you're gonna find the right person when you do that. Yeah, I feel like mutual friends, too, is a good way. Like if you have a friend that kind of knows a friend that says me, she might are you someone saying no, no, I was. I think it could work potentially if you see that's it's to get on you. I get like, such a such would be so cute together. And then yeah, I tried

that one time. They're calling me, you know what's wrong with your nigga, bro? I'm like, what you made? I thought y'all was nice. You said that happens all the time.

Insist this, but I don't think necessarily playing matchmaker. But I'm saying, for example, I'm having to cook out at my house, a couple of friends get together, a couple of friends together, and people organically just kind of hit it off, and it's like, Okay, if my like minded groups of friends get together in the same comple space, then maybe somebody might connect, you know, so not necessarily matchmaker, but more like that. So good luck to you sis

on your search. Us question, what's up? Brother? I want to know how y'all like everything like constant conversation, like no real talk. People think that in order for you to have longevity with someone, you just have to have a soul mate with everything y'all agree on everything, all your ideologies online. That's not the case. We tend to

disagree on a lot of things. But what makes us work is that I feel safe being open about what I need and what I want, and I try to create a safe space for her to do the same thing because what I don't want her to do is to ever feel like she has to say what I want to hear and in order for us to work, because ultimately actually gets exhausting, and then you're like, man, I'm tired of doing this, no more. No, I don't like popcorn. You know what I'm saying. You know, it'd

be it'd be simple things. When you're in a relationship with somebody for a long time and you're trying to be something that you're not because you want to appease that person, It'll be something that just breaks the Campmel's back. I remember one of the first arguments we had that was like like like really like like big deal. When we moved to Detroit. This is the first time we had our own house and you could set the furnace to make it how a cold and she leaves that

motherfucking man eighty degrees. I like my thermostat on Kingston, Jamaica, and period, you come to the house, it's gonna be hot. It's always hot. And I remember I was just frustrated trying to jump through these hoops to be like the perfect man or ideal man of what she wants. And I'm jumping through the hoopsman. And I walked in the house one day and I was just wearing bullets and I was like, enough, turn the heat down, what's your problem?

And then I didn't realize she was doing the same thing, and she like, did nobody wanted that cold in here? I'll come here every day. You want me with my ass out, you want me wearing this stuff. I can't be coldhead. And we arguing about the thermostat, bro the thermostat. We arguing, screaming, cursing at each other, talking about each other, families opened the thermostat bro. I didn't say anything about you, my scoop, Brian, I said nothing about you. Guys, have

nothing but love in respect for all of you. She's like you like, get colder. He's just like your father. You're sitting down, Just watch the teeth like your father. Old your hand back just like dude. But no, seriously, like we have. Do you remember the clip that went viral of us. The people were trying to like pretty much bash us, and we were talking about sex openly and talking about monogamy in all honesty. That has been the key to our relationship. We have hard conversations all

the time, just hard conversations about anything. Why Why do you not know how to manage money? Where where did that come from? Let's talk about your family history with finances. You know what I'm saying, Devout, Why do you like sex so much? What? What? What is it about it? And we sit down and have these conversations, and then once you have those conversations, you start to realize, like, wait,

we can work our way through these things. You know what I'm saying, Oh, if if that's what you need in order to feel comfortable, I'm willing to bend for that. And if that's what you need, I'm willing to bend for that. But a lot of people don't want to have those conversations, you know, So he said, a lot of people are not blunt. They are they want to spare other people's feelings. What's the name of this podcast,

dead ass? It's dead ass for a reason because a lot of our arguments would end in you really said that and dead ass? You feel that way? Dead ass? If this is gonna be my soul, many like I'm supposed to spend the rest of my life with this woman, I have to know how she feels. And I have to as a man because a lot of times it would be us who feel like And I'll be honest,

we're taught. We're taught. Somebody talk about it a vow say it again, No understand understand what it's like to be a black man in this country for for a minute, right. You're taught that when you go out in the world, you have to be strong. You have to hold your feelings aside, and you have to keep this facade of strength. That's what you're taught from young Like if you just put a young black man in the room. He doesn't

come up with that himself. He's been taught that. So now that he's a man, and that's how you asked, you can't say or you got problems, I'm leaving you alone. We gotta work through that together. That was a large part of my problem. I didn't want to be vulnerable. I had to be tough. I had to be strong. My father taught me that. My father taught me that because his father, who was in the nave, he taught

him that. You understand what I'm saying. When you get older, you start to learn that these are the things that you can break down. And when you can be vulnerable with the person that you love, that toughness comes from you sharing. You know what I'm saying. What I'm saying are on This is some best friendship. Like he and

I literally best friends. And when you think about the relationship of a friend, it's a relationship that you generally have by choice, right, It's not like a family type joint. And I choose to want to understand him, I choose to want to respect him. I choose to want to not make him happy because I don't think that I can make him happy happy. This is something that he has to find within. But however, I can contribute to

making his workload lighter. If he has to fight his way through the world, He's not gonna have to fight his way with me at the end of the day. Dead Ass is a production of I Heart Media podcast network and is produced by Dinorapinia and Triple Follow the podcast on social media at dead as the podcasts and Never miss a Thing