Election 2020: What you need to know with Shaun King

more important thing to mention, we're married. We are. We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of life's most taboo topics, things most folks don't want to talk about through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass is a term that we say every day. So when we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts, the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. We're about to take pillow talk to a whole new level. Dead

Ad starts right now. This story time is going to take us back to the year two thousand and four. Two th That was a good year? Was it? Was it good year? That? Yeah, we're two years in. That was going into my junior year of college, and was it no, my sophomore year of college when so no, that was my junior college two thousand four, Yes, your junior because jun college we started dating, and I remember dealing with listening to all of the voting issues that

happened in the two thousand election. But at that time I was only sixteen and I couldn't vote, And I remember it was it was George Bush versus Al Gore, and there was a whole discrepancy about Florida and the popular vote, but Florida being announced that as a Republican state and George Bush actually winning the presidency. So I remember saying to myself, when I'm able to vote for the presidential election in two thousand and four, I was

going to participate. So in two thousand four was the first time I actually voted, And it wasn't until two thousand and eight when I actually started making money and we were voting again, and I went and I voted for President Barack Obama. That I realized that there were so many other elections in between two thousand and four and two thousand and eight that I should have been

a part of. In order to help the man that I wanted to be president put forth the legislation that he was proposing so voting for the people locally and on the level that really impacted you, which I'm surprised that because your mom is an avid voter and she is always texting us in the groups remind us about voting and regardless of the election. I got to give credit to my mom. She was always that way. But me being at the time and then I was playing

college football, better things to do. I was doing the football season, My focus was not on voting, and then, to be honest, the reason why I didn't vote until two thousand and four and then start focusing more on two thousand eight was because I always had this idea that my vote didn't count absolutely all right, So election day is November three, Lord, and with the presidency and dire need of change, it is crucial people, crucial for

our communities to get to the polls. If you're not getting to the polls physically, there's voting early, they're sending it in by mail. Uh. Shaun King is going to join us today, um to share important information surrounding the election and things when it comes to voting, and it's funny listening to your story time. I will also say that I was guilty of thinking oh, when I turned eighteen, like automatically I should be able to vote. So I remember going to the polls with my parents. I want

to say it was like a local election happening. My mother took me and I went and my name wasn't there. So I was like, but I'm eighteen, like I should be able to vote, not knowing that there's a process to be able to register to vote to then be able to vote, you know, And that's just something that I just kind of went over my head. And you know, my mom was kind of like, girl, didn't you know you were supposed to register? And I was like, I

thought it just kind of automatically happened. When I was eighteen, my mother took me to register to vote. I hear that my mother. My mother shout out to Karen Ellis, you know, play the games when it comes to voteing. My mother don't play no games. And I want to I want to speak to the people as to why voting is so important and how it became important to me. Um. When I retired from the NFL in two thousand and ten, I came back to Brooklyn and I started to mentor

young athletes in Brooklyn. I always talk out the prototype Sports Performance Lab. And I remember, I'm dealing with so many issues within my community that the president couldn't change, you know. I had I had a couple of young men who are dealing with our law issues, had a couple of young men who was whose families were dealing with health issues. And when you think about these things,

these things directly affect us daily. And it was more important for me at that point to know who the precinct, who was the head of the precinct, who was the district leader, who was the alderman, who was your city councilman. And at that point, that's when I started going to

these these meetings. And I remember going to the city council meeting and we live in Crownhouse, Crown Heights at the time, and I remember walking in there to speak to Councilman Cornegee, and I remember seeing the place filled with Hasidic Jewish people and I remember saying to myself, were we have like an even split in Crown Heights between the West Indian Black American community and the Hasidic Jewish community? But when I walked into this, make me

we were under represented. So everything that was happening was happening based on the people who were making demands and saying these things need to change. And it was at that point that I realized, you know what, I need

more funding for my program. I got to know my councilman, I gotta know my older and I have to know who the district attorney is because um, we had a young man who was dealing with and arrest issue and was facing murder charges and it was important for us and his family to know who the district attorney was going to be. So at that point, it's like, wow, here I am focused my whole life on the president President.

And the sad part is there were times where I voted because my mom was on my back, where I walked in there knowing it don't matter if I vote because New York is a historically blue state anyway, and the electoral college is gonna vote for him anyway. So what's the point. And it's like the older I became and the more I gave involved in my my city and my my neighborhood, that I realized, Man, there's so many more things that we can focus on than just

the president. Listen, I think about times i've walked into make you Know my vote count, and I look at these ballots and I don't know these people on the ballot. So at that point, I'm just like, is it an any Meani mighty Mo? And it's like a shame on you moment that I have for have not done my research and do my due diligence going into these voting you know, polls to actually pick for somebody that I know will evoke some sort of change that I want

to see happen. So there's really a process around educating yourself when it comes to voting and making sure that you are really understanding who is fighting for what does it align with what you're looking for? And I mean, you know, it's funny. We didn't do a karaoke today, but I'm thinking about that song that My Baby's Love from Bob Marley, Get Up, Stand Up, Yeah, stand up for your right? That was that was Cairo song back in the day, speaking of standing up for your rights.

I think there's an important aspect of voting for a presidential candidate that people don't take into account. Right, And I'm going to be very clear this year, I'm voting for a Biden, right and it's not because I'm a huge Biden fan. I talked about this all the time.

When you talk about the crime Bill and the fact that he constructed this bill, and you think about mass incarceration, and you think about the Clintons, the Democrats have not necessarily represented black people and people of color in the

best way over. I think it's over of the jail population are male population of black and brown men, right, And you figured a lot of that came from what we talked about this before the War on drugs and how they weaponized the police department in order to arrest and lock up black and brown men, even though the crack epidemic wasn't as big as the cocaine powder cocaine epidemic was at the time that they declared the War on drugs. In actual war on drugs, cocaine was a

way bigger deal. But you could be on cocaine and get away with it. But you know, that's in the different story. What I look at for a presidential Canada is also their ability to appoint judges. Right. Donald Trump to this date has appointed a hundred and ninety four of the seven hundred and ninety two judges that have life terms. Think about that, think about that, and I think it is important. You can say what you want to say about Joe Biden about Donald Trump. I'm not

a fan of either one of them. Like, to be perfectly honest, I do think they're both out of touch. There's seventy plus your old white man. How could they possibly know what it's like to deal with the issues we have to deal with as a millennial black couple. They just don't. But you look at Kamala Harris and even her track record as a district attorney is questionable.

People say, oh, she was doing her job. Yes, she was doing her job, but she was also allowing things to happen under her watch that allowed for the incarceration of black men and women in California. Right that was eleven years ago, I believe. But she's had way more legislation and made changes during her time as in the Senate, So she hasn't She didn't stay at that point. She did make some changes. My thing is, who is Biden going to surround himself with is a cabinet that's going

to represent a more diverse America. Donald Trump has already proven and he's only going to surround himself with older white males who stay out of touch with what's going on in America. You don't have to fire for them to be in touch with exactly. So for me, when I'm voting, I'm not just voting for the man who's gonna sit and I'm voting for the person who's gonna appoint judges and also someone who's going to have a cabinet that looks like America, you know, saying what I'm saying.

And people don't get that. People get how you vote for this guy? He did not crime. Billers like, how can you vote for Trump? He's a biggot. Whoever you choose, You have to choose and make your decisions based on the totality of what the presidential seat requires. You know what I'm saying. It's not just about their record, because if we learned anything from Obama, one man can't change the whole country teams in eight years. You need a team,

You need people, and you also need Congress. You need the entire legislative branch to be able to represent American the way it looks in this see any kind of change. Yeah, so we're gonna vote. We know who you who, You're gonna vote for. But the fact is that people need

to be out and vote. And one thing that I am extremely disappointed in and really give a side eye two um, and we'll talk about this more with Sean, is just the fact that we can do so many things nowadays with just a fingerprint or with your eyes, you know, facial recognition, global entry. There are all of these technologically savvy ways to be recognized and to do things nowadays. And it really makes me wonder why can't

voting be the same way. Why can't I be in a different state than my voting state and not have the ability to vote and vote accurately and efficiently where I am It has to be snail male and hand count, you know. And and people want to say the system is broken, though again, just like racism, the system is designed to work the way they wanted to work, because if there's anything that makes voting more efficient for people, it's not going to have the outcome that they want.

That's the truth. It's not. So that's a major side eye that I give. Y'all can figure out a way to make this ship easier for people. This is another truth, and people don't like to hear it. America in totality, the people, the American people are not a country of biggots. The laws are biggoted, the people in power are biggest, but the vast majority of Americans are very different than what America was fifty sixty years ago. It's the truth. People don't want to own up to believe it, but

it's the truth. It is the truth. We have to find a way to make a change, and I'm excited to Sean can go be here with it? Absolutely, we are going to talk to Sean. I mean, it's been a long four years of appearing a whole lot of tragedy and disappointment one after the other. So it's time to elect a new president. November three is election day y'all all over the country, and hasn't been dramatic enough, baby boy, the speculation surrounding this election I think is

gonna be up for the whole oscar. It's just not even funny at this point. But yeah, we're gonna have Shaun King joined us and we will talk more and get some insight from him around voting. So Shaun King is here with us today to help us prepare for the upcoming presidential election. Shaun King, the writer, civil rights activists, co founder of Real Justice Pack, father, husband, so many things.

Welcome Shaun King. Yes, yes, Before we get started, though, I want to say the Shaun King because everything that he's doing now pushing forward the voice for Black America and for disenfranchised people, I think s importantly because he's taking a huge step in making a huge sacrifice for both him and his family. So I'm gonna say the Shaun King. We welcome you, brother, thank you for joining us. Yeah,

I appreciate you both. So Sean, Um, in a digital age of activism, you have also become a celebrity in your own right. So before we jump into the voting, we just want to know, particularly about the challenges that have come along with the added pressure to constantly have to defend to the public or the public's perception of who you are. Because, like we said, well you know, Sean, the father, the husband, the man, You're still fighting the good fight. So how do you how are you able

to um work around those challenges that have arose? Um with that it's a lot actually, Um, When when people ask me that question, just like you are, try to be super honest about it, like it's not clean. It's it's hard. It's hard for my family, it's hard for me. Every day I'm dealing with some type of for loss, allegation or accusation or crazy rumor or trending topic. I think over the years, I've gotten kind of numb to it. And I don't even necessarily mean that in a healthy way.

Like you, you just grow kind of numb to the negativity. And if you, if you see it all the time, I can't. I can't allow it in my mind and in my heart and still have a productive day. Like as soon as as soon as we finished this episode, I'm leading us that I have a staff meeting to lead, and that's how my day goes. It's like one important gathering after meeting. And if I if I log into Instagram and allow something ugly that somebody says to take

me somewhere different, I couldn't even be effective. And so what I found is even when I respond to something crazy that somebody says, like with an honest, thorough answer, it informs the two of you. It informs people who are supportive, but the people who are detractors, they literally don't care. They're not they're not looking for answers. They're not looking for the truth. They're just kind of throwing daggers.

And and so what I have found is I've spent so much time answering critics, and what I found is they don't even look at the critics. They don't even look at my answer to at all. They don't they

don't care. It's funny because I was I was just looking at a movie trailer for a movie coming out, Judas in the Black Messiah, and it was talking about the Fred Hampton story and pretty much how the federal government UM is able to discredit black leadership by pretty much using all all forces around them, whether it's a local government, whether it's law enforcement, social media. At the time they didn't have social media, but using cointel pro

style tactics to pretty much discredit anything you say. And I suppos that you made about that and having that conversation with former members of the Black Panther Party, and and can you speak a little bit about UM, how do you find the strength because I don't even want to talk about how you define it. We rent want to talk about how do you find the strength to continue to push forward when you know these style of

taxes are happening. Well, what first, These types of attacks are happening not just against me, but against anybody who's out here being effective. Anytime you try to challenge the status quo, just challenge the way things are. Depending on how much you're trying to challenge it, there will always be opposition. And I guess what stings is. It's one thing to know that emotionally, like I know historically that

that's how it happens. It's another thing to be in the middle of it and to actually experience it and deal with it. And the most effective tactic really from Quintell pro is not to turn the me to you against you. It's not to turn famous people against you. Is to turn your own people against you. And and when when that happens, And that's in some ways some of the biggest challenge that even Malcolm faced, and in some ways it's one of the big challenges that Martin faced.

We see him now is just like this super heroic figure. But when when Dr King died there was a pole just taking almost three weeks before he was killed. He was deeply unpopular, not just with white folk, the majority of black folk also disapproved of Doctor King, which people had effective. Yes, Now, if you ask anybody who was alive in that final year of his life, they will all now tell you they loved him. But in that

final year it wasn't true. And he was when when Malcolm was assassinated, he was literally the least popular black leader in America. I mean, he was as if you could imagine in your mind, a very unpopular black leader right now, Malcolm was about at that level. Now we have retroactively imposed kind of a popularity on him didn't really exist at that moment. What I what I do every day, there are two or three things that I have to kind of remind myself of, almost like a

mantra um. There are goals that I have that I'm fighting for that are that are bigger than me, bigger than my popularity, bigger than how anybody feels about me. And so in a lot of ways, I'm always trying to keep my eyes on the goals that we're pursuing. There are people that were trying to elect their laws that we're trying to change, their policies that we're trying

to shift. And what I've learned is my poul like personally, my popularity is up and down, and I can't allow my self esteem and and and my own value to kind of ride on that popularity roller posts are like there are days where I get an award from Rihanna, and then there are days where I'm trending and people are clowning with memes and everything else. And so when I'm getting the award, I don't allow the award to

make my head get big. And when I'm trending for something ugly, I don't then all of a sudden feel horrible about myself. I kind of just try to be even been killed through it all. I have to remind myself. I mean, I'm I have a family that loves me. I have a what I've been with my wife almost twenty five years since we were kids. Um we have we have five kids that are doing well and great. I have a I have staffs that I love and

work well with, teams of friends and supporters. But there's something about our psyche that can allow one negative thing to take us in a weird place. And I've tried to I've tried to get beyond that, and it's taken me probably ten years to figure out how to be above that. But you just can't allow your your popularity on any giving day to dictate how you feel about yourself,

good or bad. Well, one thing I've learned about American history is that, um, anybody who was on the right side of politics, especially social justice during that time, is always considered the villain and made public enemy number one. I mean, you look at everyone loved Dolly when he was dying, huge parade, The whole world loved him during the time when he was speaking four Blacks in America, he was public enemy number one, had to give away

his titles. You look at Colin Kaepernick four years ago, he was considered a terrorist. Like I used to look at memes that Colin Kaepernick, and now he has billboards on in New York. And you know, it's just funny to me that we as a people continue to watch these things happen cyclically, you know, so over and over again. But every time it happens, it's like, no, this guy, you know, but this guy is really the terrorist this time.

All those other times we were wrong, but this guy, this guy, and then later on in history they will be praising and said he was right the entire time. It's just it's part for the course. So let's get into some of this this voting. Because I told the story about and during story time about the first time

I voted. I was twenty years old and it was during the two thousand and four elections Bush and Kerry, and I didn't understand the importance from and I had two years that I could have voted, you know, from eighteen to twenty on different elections, and I really did not understand the importance. And I didn't understand voters suppression. Because so can you talk to us a little bit about what's going on in this election and how we

can avoid voter suppression and things of that nature. Yeah, Well, first off, I think you, as a young voter is probably almost identical to most of us as young voters like I have to put that in some ways off on our school system and educational system, and even just as a society. We focus so much of our energy on the presidential election that when you turn like my two oldest daughters their eighteen and twenty and so they're getting to vote for the first time in the presidential race.

They're getting to vote for the first time this year. But when I was eighteen and nineteen years old, I had I had no real understanding about city council races, um local school board races, state senators, state house races. And you know, one of the organizations is that I run Real Justice. We help elect new district attorneys all over the country. We've now, we've ousted it twenty horrible district attorneys and replaced it, replaced them with brilliant, compassionate

women and men all over the country. How I was probably in my early thirties before I even understood what the district attorney was. And some of that is just how our educational system works. And so even that in some ways is its own form of voter suppression. Voter suppression is anything intentionally or unintentionally that prevents people from voting, prevents people from wanting to vote thinking that they can vote.

And this country, the United States, has one of the lowest average voting rates of any developed countries in the world. Only about fifty percent of Americans vote in presidential election. In most developed countries, it's closer to sevent in some countries like Australia. Uh in Australia, you are required to vote and if you don't vote, there is a fine. So they have been Australia, it's called compulsory voting, and

over of all Australians vote. It's a part of your civic duty, like just like, yeah, you pay taxes, you should be forced to vote. It makes sense and and so and in Australia is not the only country that does that. And so we have just about fifty percent participation. And and what that means is when so few people participate is the average American is a non voter. And even people that we that you and I know, that

we think are voting, they're not voting. We should assume that half of our friends, half of our followers, they're not. And some of it is that they're so busy. Some of it is that they're confused on where they vote. Some people don't know if they're properly registered. So we can tweet it and post it an instagram it, but there's still just a real low understanding that people have on how and where to vote. It's it's partly because of our system. It's super unclear. Um and that's what

we're recorded. I think that's done on purpose. Because you said something last night we were talking about, is that you can go to an airport now stick your fingers on a device, or let them look at your who the hell you are? Right? How is it possible that we don't have this technology? They'll just vote wherever you are,

regardless of where there should be something in place. I mean, you can do so many things electronically now, you know, you go to the airport, you look in the machine, clear looks at your eyes, and it knows who you are. Why can't we do something like that? We could, But the real answer to that is there are people in power who understand that they will stay in power when

fewer people vote. And we could absolutely have sophisticated technological systems that are safe, secure, just like like you said, just like clear at the airport. We could have those types of things. But our our country also spends so little money developing our infrastructure, not just our voting infrastructure, but anything from roads to bridges, to our school systems to our health care systems. So all of these things are underdeveloped, and it's it's the American way in some ways.

And so I was gonna say, we saw just this past week in Origin of people waiting in line for ten to twelve hours to vote, and I and we called that voter suppression. I saw people say, well, why is that voter suppression? Well, it's voter suppression because people were passing out in line, people had to leave and go work, people had to leave and go pick up their kids. Yeah, it's a it's a way to discourage

people from voting. And yeah, it's frustrating, super frustrating. Yeah, there's also now the question to that, you know, what's going to happen at forty five decides that he will not peacefully leave his seat, you know, if he's not re elected in November. So what do you think about that? Are there any legal protections that are in place to prevent this, or how can we prepare for something like this because a lot of people are saying there's going to be a whole civil war if if things don't

go his way come November three. Well, first, Donald Trump has all but said publicly over and over again that he already thinks this this elect is rigged, that the voting is rigged against him. He's already kind of projected that after election day he's not just going to accept the results the way we've seen every other presidential administration

before this. Due the difference is if you go all the way back to two thousand when there was a contested election that went all the way to the Supreme Board. The difference was neither one of them were incumbents. They were Bill Clinton had his final term, and so it wasn't like one of them could just say I'm staying in office. Well, now we're going to get a contested election against someone who already has the position, and we've never really had someone like Donald Trump as president, and

so they're they're probably three scenarios. The first is is difficult but possible, and this would be the best scenario, is that Joe Biden wins on election day in enough states that can declare their winner, that he wins by a landslide, in enough states that say we certify that Joe Biden wins that on election night, he actually crosses two d and seventy delegates and the media declares him

a winner. Joe Biden may not, I mean, Donald Trump may not immediately accept it, but that's the best case scenario, is that Joe Biden crosses to seventy. And I've seen a couple pundits kind of show where Joe Biden would have to win for that to happen, he he would have to win almost every contested state if he won in a shocking way, if he won like Texas or something like that, then that would easily push him over that the more likely scenario. And this is not like

a conspiracy theory or doomsday. Because of the pandemic, tens of millions of Americans have already voted by mail, and that's okay, and I don't want to discourage anybody from doing that, but about half of American states don't begin counting those ballots until the end of election day. And and so what that means is for twenty states where millions of people have voted by mail, those votes don't

start to count until late on election night. In those states are already saying like, hey, it's gonna take us several days to count them. So to be fair to Donald Trump, and for a moment, if I was if I was president and no one crossed the two seventy thresholds and there were still millions of votes out, if I'm Joe Biden or Donald Trump, I'm gonna say no, no, no, no, no, You're not a winner because these votes have not all been counted. Now, not only would Donald Trump be right

to say that? And we have to say this because the roles may be reversed where Donald Trump tries to declare himself a winner before votes in Arizona and Ohio and Wisconsin have been counted, and say say Donald Trump is up on election night in some of those states, but none of the mail in violets have been counted, then Joe Biden has to be the one to say on election night, hold on, tens of millions of votes have not even been counted yet, you can't declare yourself

a winner. That's probably where we're going to be. And that's not a doomsday scenario. It's just it's a result of the pandemic. And there is a small chance that Joe Biden could win on election night. I don't see a good chance of Donald Trump winning on a let He could still win, but I don't think that he would honestly win on election night. Um, the more likely scenario is it's going to take a couple of days,

and uh, it's gonna be difficult, man. Well, rounding things out with you, Sean, because I know you have a lot going on, so you we just want to talk real quick about we had an opportunity to actually speak with presidential hopeful Biden UM about his campaign, and we, you know, we believe that the conversations like that are necessary,

especially for the black community, UM, and especially now. UM. But a lot of people are really feeling like they're just going to have to choose between the lesser of two evils. You have you know, Kamala Harris, her record as a prosecutor, you have him in the legacy of the ninety four crime bill. UM. People are rightfully leery of their willingness to be able to bring positive change,

especially to people of color. So, you know, giving their reputations, UM, what what do we have to look forward to if they're elected? How we can how can we continue to put pressure on Harris and Biden to meet our needs and demands if they are to be elected into office. So I was a huge critic of Joe Biden, and UM, I am I'm not a Joe Biden fan. I'm not a Joe by a sup order. UM. I've I've written long pieces about his record on mass incarceration and criminal

justice in general. I have to remind people, though, that in all elections, not just presidential elections, but in governor's races and mayor's races, often your favorite candidate doesn't win. So I work with the Bernie Sanders campaign. I love Bernie, I loved his policies, I trust his integrity, and but

Bernie's not the nominee. And and so for me, as as I am one of those people who have a huge beef with Joe Biden, I think Joe Biden on his worst day, and then I say this as somebody who was incredibly critical of him, is still better than the best version of Donald Trump. The Donald Trump he has now told. According to the Washington Post, they have

a live tracker. Why they tracked how many lives details every day he's told twenty three thousand lies, which is the most any human being has ever been measured to do. Three thousand. That's just in the three and a half years of his administration. And those are just the public lives that we know of. On a good day, he's dishonest on a on a good day for him, he's still a bigot. And and so even Donald Trump's role

in mismanaging the pandemic, all of those things. When I go to vote, and I haven't voted by mail, I'm gonna go either vote on election day or vote on an early voting day. I am not pumped up and charged about voting for Joe Biden. In a lot of ways, I'm going to vote against Donald Trump. With all of that said, I have several friends who work for the Joe Biden campaign, friends and I love and trust. I've had several dear friends who have endorsed him and have

helped craft some of his policies. We will have not just more access but leverage with Joe Biden. Um. When Joe Biden appoints judges or Supreme Court justices, all of those things, we are way more likely to get people who not only look like us, but agree with the way we see the world. And I plan on when Joe Biden is elected, just for me personally, I plan on going kind of back to my role as a

critic of Joe Biden. I've tried to hold some of that back during this campaign, but some of us need to hold him accountable, and that that kind of what I see my role as See It's funny because I've taken this stance and educated myself on American history, understanding that throughout time, the difference between Republican politics and democratic politics has been overt racism versus covert racism, and crime

Bill has been in a perfect example of that. But when we're choosing a and I try to tell people, you're choosing someone to sit in a position, but you're choosing someone that's also going to choose a cabinet and also appoint judges. So for me, when it comes to voting, I want to vote someone who was going to I'm going to vote someone in who was going to think about people who not only look like me, but people who are also dealing with similar struggles who don't look

like me. Because ultimately, it's not only about just being a black man. What about black women, what about the LGBTQ community, What about all of the other different demographics and misrepresented people in the government. If we continue to vote the same old seventy plus white males into office, they're only going to focus on that demographic. And for me,

that's what needs to change. It's not just about the black rhetoric and whatever, because it's important that we've had a black president before, and even during that eight year presidency, we felt neglected once again, we felt neglected and I think it's fair for us to hold people accountable. I feel like now is the time where we use our voices and we speak about not just the policies of Joe Biden, but the cabinet he's gonna put in and the judges he can appoint. Yeah, yeah, I agree. Well, Sean,

we appreciate you. We thank you so much for joining us. We know you have to run. Hopefully we can do this again. You're also an alumni and Black Love Doctors like yeah, I love that. Yeah, those are my people, and I'm so glad we get to to tell our

stories there. You know today you're interviewing me, but uh, so much of why I am who I am as because of my wife and and we've been together so I'm forty one, we've been together since we were fifteen and sixteen, and you know, so much of what I do I do not just because she empowers me to do it, but she really makes it, makes my whole world work. She's a great I'm a terrible manager, guilty, guilty, And uh I've tried to get better. I don't just like I'm trying to grow and get better every day

at that. But without her, yeah, you wouldn't even know me without her better complementing those those weaknesses and elevating the strength. So thank you so much, Sean for taking the time. Love to you, Love to your family. We're gonna pray for you always, perfect family, Keep fighting. Anything we can do to help get the information out, um continue. Hopefully we can keep this line of communication any any way. We can use our platforms to to push anything that

you want to push forward. Man, we're here for sure. I appreciate his honesty, you know what I'm saying. If people really look at history, anytime a black person, not just a black man, black person, black man, a black woman decided to speak up for the injustices done to black people, they're often villainized. And I can honestly say I think that this is happening to Sean, and I wish the best for him and his family, because it's not easy to sit where he's sitting. It really isn't.

We can all sit back and throw stones and say he should be doing this, he should be doing that, Why isn't this happening? But until you're able to sit down and discuss things and see the work he's doing, you can't agree. I agreed. I mean it takes a lot to put himself and his family out on the forefront like this. So um, major respect out to you, Sean King. All Right, you know what, let's take a quick break. Um, we had a lot going on in this episode so far. Let's move into listener letters after

we get into some ads. All right, so stick around. All right, So we're back. Now. That was a heavy episode, very important, very educational, enlightening. Hopefully you guys are registered to vote and you get out there and let your voices be heard. But right now we're gonna get into some listener. I just kind of lightened things up a little bit. I see you with the black leather on, I see you a little Angela Davis makes me feel a little you know. So I got on a white shirt.

Letters are black and it says radical, Right, you want to be that radical change? You see that radical? But a black letters got to be on the white shirt. Oh my god, you're hilarious. Alright, So let's start with this first. Listen to letter, alright, he says, Listen, I have recently gotten to a place where I feel like I have done so much growth. I went through therapy to work on some of my issues I saw within myself and the pattern I saw in my family. So

I feel like a new person. I'm alright, just graduated from grad school, talk about it, and I live on my own. I'm at a point in my life where i just want to live life to the fullest. I'm a seditary, so I feel like it's my calling to go see the world. However, that's your favorite word, you love saying that it must be a sagittarious thing. However, I feel like I get stuck because I often think about what others say. To a certain extent, I feel strongly when it comes to my emotions, so I I

feel hard when I feel guilt. I do what I want because I am young and I don't want to take for granted my young years. But I do worry about what others think, like family members. I always feel guilty when I do what is not expected of me. What advice do you guys have for a young black

man in his twenties wanting to live life unapologetically nice? Alright? Brother? Well, first of all, being as super smart sagittarius as I can see, um, you seem to be very aware and touch you know of your emotions and the way you feel, the fact that you've been to therapy, you've already been to work through family patterns and all that stuff. I think that's a great thing. So you're already ahead of the curve, because some people are still trying to figure

that out well off into their their years. Um, I will tell you. For me, I had a very similar situation where I got very concerned about what people think and people being the collective, just people in general, but

also yes, family friends, all that good stuff. I will say de Voo being the total opposite of not if it's about what people think, you saved my life, bro, because there was for a long time I was just very like, you know, kind of tiptoeing around things that I wanted to do with things that really ultimately made me happy. And I really had to assess, like who was at fault here, who was going to suffer the most if I was not true to myself? And ultimately,

you do one thing, somebody has an opinion. You do the other thing, somebody has an opinion good or bad. So if you really live your life riding that roller coaster, kind of like what Shawn said in his portion of the interview if he was to just like you know, relish on the highs and then really beat on himself on the loads. Everybody's gonna have an opinion about whatever you do, so you might as well do what you

want to do anyway. Sounding like I know, I know, squeeze, I'm just saying I've really adopted that philosophy in life. Who cares. If we had listened to family members, we would not have the platform that we have right now. If we listen to people saying, y'all doing too much. Y'all doing all this stuff on the internet. What y'all doing You're doing it for likes, you're doing it for this, and here we are because we didn't listen to it.

We didn't bro do your thing. If I can go back into my twenties, okay, twenty year old, two year old ding and be like, sis, here's the team on doing what people expect you to do, or like worrying about what people have to say, let me tell tell you living my whole best life. This is the analogy I give some of my kids who have the same conversation. They're like, man, you know, I don't know what to do with people saying that I'm just do this. People

saying I say this, nobody knows anything. Okay, listen to me. They don't know nothing. We all wake up every day and we fucking guess. We're guessing. There was a point in the world where everybody knew the Earth was flat. Think about that. Think about there was a point where everybody on Earth knew the Earth was flat. And then what happened? We find out the Earth is round. But at some point everybody was telling people, don't don't go there, don't don't go sail out in the ocean, because you're

gonna fall off the edge of the earth. So you know what happened. People wasn't sailing because everybody was telling them what to do. And it wasn't until you pull up your own sail and you use the wind to gus you analogy through anhalogy, brother, find out that the world is around on your own. That's what I'm gonna just bring it to that. Put yourself up. If you listen to everybody, you're gonna walk around thinking Earth is flat, That's all I'm gonna say, and be severely unhappy and

put your sales up. Put yourself up, be the wind beneath your own wings or your own sale or but the wind beneath you say are the wings? There's a song, So I got that. But I was just trying to like what you're supposed to be on my You're supposed to be the wind beneath my wings. I was sailing on my analogy. I was sailing on my analogy. I'm blow. I'm gonna blow under your wings. I love that. See

what I'm saying. You see how I go through. I appreciate you, but honestly, honestly, bro, there's no wrong decisions in life. You make your decisions and you deal with the consequences that you create, and you deal with it. And if your family is your family and your friends or your friends and they love you for who you are, they're gonna support you either way. And if they don't, now you know where you stands period, period, period with you. All Right, onto the next one. That was pretty easy.

Do you want to read for it? Okay? My family is from Guyana and moved to New York where my mom was a team. She hasn't been a guy. You love guying these people, these people too, shout out wayn year with shout out my auntie Angie raised me. She's guying you finish your homework. She hasn't been a fan of any boyfriend I've had on and usually doesn't mind her opinion, doesn't give her opinion soil after things have ended. Okay, I'm with my boyfriend about a year and I love

him very much. My mother will smile and keep KEI in front of my boyfriend whenever he's around, but if he's around for too long, she can be rude and snappy behind his back. We recently had a conversation and she basically said that she feels he's not good enough for me. He works, so you're not good enough for me. No, y'all you not good enough for you? Ye? He works in mechanics. You know he works in mechanics and has stated in the past that he doesn't plan on going

back to college. Basically, my is did they give you a hard time with who you chose to love a girl? Why are you going to start? Do you think that it has to do with the culture and how parents view their girl child. Do you want to do this or you want me to take this? I know, devil, I know, I understand. Okay, listen, yes, MEMI hated me. Me, Me hated me, all right. She thought I was a thug, a hooligan, a dumb athlete. I thought I was gonna just take a door away and destroy her life. Yeah,

pretty mad. Look now, look that's what happens when you do things and don't care what people have to say. I literally was like, this is my boyfriend though, and I love him, but I don't really care what you'll have to say. So here we are. But I do understand the perspective of Okay. For example, me growing up in my household to very strict West Indian parents who did not really want their girl child out in these streets, and it was go to school, come home, go to school,

come home. Like that's just that's just what it was. Um so yes, my mon, did No, I didn't. I was taking detours sometimes, you know what I mean, I was taking I would say, that's awful det I was not like that. I wasn't on tour like that. You know what I'm saying. But I'm just saying, in order to just get a little bit of freedom, you just start to like, you know, deviate from like the coming straight home goodbye to be Sody started his miike off.

That being said, when time came for me to start bringing boys around, okay, and this was until you didn't start coming around til we were what eighteen years all. At the time, my mother literally said to me, conty, you could have walked through the door with Jesus Christ himself and I would not care. I wouldn't care. I absolutely wouldn't because you're my daughter, and I feel like I know what's best for you. And at that time, I just wanted you to focus on yourself and schooling

in career. Jesus Christ, yeah, pretty much, and Jesus not good enough for you. No, Well, I don't know. We might be in the rapture right now and not even

know it, so who knows, um. But no, in all seriousness, we I did have a hard time in the beginning, just because I think it was my parents idea of wrapping their mind around the fact that there was a young man who was now going to, you know, share my attention, that I would have been taken my eyes off of the prize, and at that time, the prize was getting my education, starting a career, building things for myself, being an individual, being independent, which were valid points at

the time, they were valid and they're still valid now and it's almost like we look back now. Of course, hindsight is deval and I both say that mom did have some points she didn't and wanting me to focus. She did definitely didn't give you a fair shot in the very hold on, hold on, hold on. She did have some points, right, But you can have points, and

then it's being rude. You can't be rude to other people kids, because you know what could have happened you you You wasn't taking detours then, but you want to detour now, right, And I could have deed towards you away from your family, because that happens a lot in families. Some people are so hard on the significant other, right that once the significant other finally grabs the heart of that person, they separate them from their family because it's

like you treated me so bad before. That is very true, and you you're going to choose once you choose the significantly extended family myself, yeah, me and me too, my extended family too. You see the family, you know, the families tight That person falls in love with someone who everyone else in the family didn't approve of, and now they go off and live their life and create their

own family because that's what people do. There's gonna be certain things in your life that I'm going to be able to provide that your family and your mom can't, right, and I'm not I wasn't gonna talk about the detours, know what I'm saying. But with that being said, there has to be a way for you to speak to

your mom about being rude. There was a point in our our core relationship, well, I didn't come to your house for about two years, right, and then it becomes all it becomes awkward for me because we were in college at the time. We would come home on the weekends and there was like a well, I want to chill with my family, but I want to chill with but he was like, I'm not coming to your house.

So then I feel divided because it's like I want to chill with my boyfriend the weekend and kick back and you know, have a good time with our families, but then I can't because he doesn't feel comfortable in my house. So we did have a period of about what two years maybe that this was going on, until there was finally like, you know, my mom extended the olive branch. I think when she saw he wasn't going nowhere. When I made to the NFL, it was around that time.

Oh see, mom, that was a bad time. Yeah, that was a bad time. I could could have school drop had been gone. And the thing is, it's not even like a man woman thincause people said, you know, is it a girl? Just that how people treat their girl child? And I'm like, no. I hear so many horror stories about young women who are treated by the young man's family, and I'm like, why would you treat somebody's daughter like that? Would you want somebody to treat your daughter like that?

I have three boys. I have three boys, right, and I'm going to be very particular about who my young men choose. I want them to have a standard that they can live up to and be proud of and live and have a person that's going to make them a better person. But in no way do I plan on disrespecting anyone's daughter, because when I have my daughter, I don't want to nobody disrespecting my daughter. You know what I'm saying. Daughter situation that we in season four,

you still talking about, y'all. Congratulations to mommy and Daddy we got a baby out of Pampers. We've retired the pampers. Pampers when retired the detour, only the detour still working. The's still a chance for me. It's still shot. They tell you there is no and in sight for anything being normally getting. It's always detours in this life, always

detours in this life with devo. Oh my god. It always comes back to the respect other people's kids, facts, and if they love your child the right way be, even if you don't, even if you don't understand everything they do. Because even your your father doesn't understand everything I do. Your father don't know how I make money right, And one thing I see about your father, though he was always respectful and I always welcome in his presence,

That is true. Yes, yes, yes, for sure. You told the story all the time when you went to ask my father and mother for my hand in marriage, and my father was just like sure, fine, by you guys, do what you guys do. Your mother was like, Mary, just give your daughter away like that. You have not questions.

You can totally see it. I wasn't there for it, but I could see you sitting at the table with my mother and my father and my father being his usual just laid back, chill, like, hey, you want to drink, let's chill. You gonna marry my daughter? All good? Take her? Take her. That's one last person for me to have to support. What is and my mom just being like, you're just gonna give away our first board like that, how dare you? The funny thing is your father you

have questions? You always have questions? What questions you have? Asked the question? Then he said and got him walked away, and it was me and your mother sitting there, and I'm just like, and then you had to get drilled, So do you have any questions? And she didn't have no question, has no questions, So I'm gonna do this. You are be cool. So I gave her a pound like I was like, all right, did that? I was like that, I'm out most awkward conversation. I love it.

But then at the actual proposal, everyone was in tears and happy and excited and all that good stuff. So good luck to you sis. Go ahead and have that talker, mom. We gotta sometimes have those talks with our very stern with in the appearance and let them know what time it is, like, this is what's happening now now in the yes and if you'd like to be featured as one of our listener letters, email l us at dead ass Advice at gmail dot com. That's d E A D A d V I. I messed up to ask

me to ask you never mess at the ass. I don't never keep your hands over there. I'm trying to get that daughter. Email us at dead ass advice at gmail dot com. That's d E A d A S S A d V I c E oh god, dead as detours. But it moment of truth time is simple, Go and vote. I don't care how you do it. I don't care how you do it, if you do it early, if you're mailing it in. I plan to get my ass on a plane and I'm going to

New York. I have some other business to take care of, but I said, you know what, I'm going to position my trip around election day. The lines may be long, but you know what, I have it in my mind that I'm going to dedicate that time to go out and physically vote in New York that's where I'm registered. Still, go back to Brooklyn, you know, see my peeps, and attempt to make a change by voting. I'm going to vote, so I encourage you to do the same. Moment of Truth.

I was today years old when I found out that over fifty only a little bit over of Americans are registered to vote. And that's that's embarrassing. But we got a whole lot of complaints though, who registered to vote? That's the only thing I have to say, registered to vote and go vote. Moment of Truth registered to vote and go vote. And of course be sure to follow us on social media. We have our dead as podcast page. It's dead As the podcast on Instagram, Instagram and of

course I'm Cadine, I am and I Am devouring. If you're listening on Apple podcast, be sure to rate, review and subscribe. Dead As is a production of I Heart Media podcast Network and is produced by the Noor Opinion and Triple Follow the podcast on social media at dead As the Podcasts and never miss a Thing.