Culture Clash

two people. Not difficult for me because I'm jamaking my heart. I'm a rasta and deep down on my soul, I'm a raster dead as I believe it. I believe it, But I will say you didn't want to revoke my black hard When we met and I told you I had never seen Friday. Oh, I forgot that. You told me that. I almost stopped talking to you almost. I was like, what you like? This girl is not cultured

dead ass. Hey, I'm Cade and I've and we're the You may know us from posting funny videos with our boys and reading each other publicly as a form of therapy, but I'm making me deby most days. Wow and one more important thing to mention we're married, Yes, sir, we are. We created this podcast to open dialogue about some of live's most taboo topics, things most folks don't want to talk about through the lens of a millennial married couple. Dead ass is a term that we say every day.

Where we say dead ass, we're actually saying facts. One hunt, the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. We're about to take Phillow's off to a whole new level. Dead ask starts now. I remember one of the first few times I went by Kay's house and I met her dad's friends and her uncle's and it was crazy because when you're not in West Indian culture and you

listen outside the house, you always think somebody fighting. And I remember your father's friend call Yo just screaming at the top of his lone yeah yeah, yeah yeah, And I'm just like, you're about to fight. But no, that's that's just how they they arguing debate like they've never

seen each other before. That your father just sits there quiet and it's always older Jamaican rum right, and they're they're arguing and debating about black people in Indian people in Jamaican culture, and I come downstairs and I'm not Jamaican, I'm American. So then the argument turned towards me, and it was about American blacks versus West Indian blacks. And we were having this conversation, and I realized at that point how much disconnect there is between the two cultures.

You know, your father's friends. You know, we're saying stuff like, you know, American blacks, you know, they're lazy, they don't they don't work as hard as Caribbean blacks. And part of it wasn't just like an attack. They were kind of asking me, like why you know, like your generation, you know, like your generation, your generation is your generation. So they thought it was you as a black American, younger Americans in general, right, and a little bit in general,

you know. But but more it was a generational thing because that's what older generations do. They always say the next generation is lazy. So we're having this argument in this discussion, and I had said to them, I said, well, let's be clear, you guys came to this country for a better life based off of the fight and sacrifice that black Americans already fought for. So those same people that you're you're saying lazy, They're the reason why you

can come here and earn a living. And it kind of got quiet because I feel like that's the first time they ever heard that perspective from a black American young man. And that's where I feel like my relationship with your dad and his friends changed because there was a resp back there because we were able to have that dialogue. Absolutely, and that's something that you didn't even

foresee as an issue per se. And it could have been a totally wrong situation, or it could have gone on and you guys could have gotten to an argument and could have just you know what, we spoke about arguing effectively and debating, And at this point, I think it was a learning experience for everyone. Yeah, we both learned a lot about each other. One love, one heart. Let's get together and feel all right. Yes, give thanks and prayers to the Lord and I will feel all right.

Let's get together and feel all right. Let's get together, folks. Yes, one love, one of them culture, One love shout out to Bob, one of the greatest humans to ever walk the face of this Let me tell you about the love I have for Robert Nesta Martley. Yes, I have no idea to the with my brother and my sister and I have the three little bird tattooed. Yes, right there, and devout felt a kind of way because I wanted to get a bird. I was like, it seem like

I'm not part of the family, but that's okay. And then we proposition devel and we're like, hey, you can totally be like the branch. Like we could put a branch the bird and you could be the branch. You would be the branch. I was like, now I'm good. I'm good. I'm going on that. It's just me and my brother s gonna get our own tattoo with Biggie, with Biggie Biggie two pocket who No, just bigg because this big Bob is from Jamaica, so Biggie is from Brooklyn.

But the context of something of somebody, we're gonna do something with threes. I'll figure it out. I'll figure it out. I figure it out. No pressure, no pressure. No competition here though, you know, and when it happens with always competition, when you always we don't want to create competition between two cultures. We want to speak about how we're able to cultivate one culture, one family from different sides of

the spectrum. So as you all know, or if you don't know, my mother is from Jamaica and my dad is from St. Vincent, both of which are in the West Indies, Jamaica and to St. Vincent and to all the other West Indian islands because out of many, one people, that is the motto of Jamaica. But I feel like the entire westing these kind of bands together in a sense. Absolutely we have a very strong culture coming out of there. So shout out to every other island. And my family

is from the States. My father's family is from South Carolina, Orange birth to be exact, and my mom's family is from Virginia, So you know, we're old school Baptist country

people came up to New York, right. So when we think about joining cultures, and this is canna be any joining of cultures, um talking about having an open mind, and you know what does that specifically mean for like our relationship, because like the story time, you pretty much return about how you kind of had to have an open mind coming into this conversation that you were doing with my dad and his friends, and it necessarily couldn't.

It could have gone wrong. You know, you could have totally taken offense to it, which I'm sure you probably did, did you did, so, you know, give us a little bit more, I guess at the meat of that conversation and why from their perspective they felt as if Black Americans were lazy. Well, because part part of it had to do with what we were talking about. I was in college at the time, so we were in college, you were in school, and they were talking about their

kids not necessarily going to college. You know, some of them had started working right out of high school and they were paying for their own school about while working. And I told him I got a scholarship to play football. And of course they made fun of me for playing football because football you don't use your feet. You catched the ball, and it's like football of soccer, football O soccer. So there was a battle there because they believe football

is soccer and American football us the real football. Thanks getting the real football. But no, but you know, I could have taken offense to it. But what it came down to was they were asking questions like, you know, like you know, if you don't play football, you know how you're gonna go to school. You're not gonna get a job. You know what I'm saying, You're not working. You're not working while you in school. And I was like,

I'm playing football to pay for school. And they were like, my kids are working and going to school, like while you're not working to go to school. And I think it too was just them ribbing me a little bit because I'm dating Joe's daughter, so they were ribbing me a little bit. Team behind me, the whole team of West Indian And that's sitting down then and make you feel mad, uncomfortable when you see on the screaming how le at you? So um they were just then, they were.

They were coming at me pretty pretty rough. At the time. I was twenty, so you know, my my ego was big. I'm feeling myself a division with athletes, so I'm I'm giving it back to them. But the thing is, I don't think they were aware of pretty much how educated I am about my culture. And I don't think that they were educated on American culture because my parents made sure. Like I said, my my grandparents are from Orangeburg, South Carolina.

My grandfather affort in the Korean War, my grandmother's family was like pivotal on the front lines of the civil rights movement down south, the ones that moved to Georgia. So it was it's always been like big for me to be proud of what my family and my culture has done for this country. So when they were asking me questions and I would I would tell them like yo, they would say, you know, Western people come here, we come here. Jamaicans, we come here. We'll do anything, will

work any job, just to make it. And I said, see, but that's part of the problem. You know what I'm saying. As Black Americans, we fought so hard to get paid a certain rate, to not have to do certain jobs, to get respected in this country, that when you come here and you're willing to do anything, it takes opportunities away from us because now what they'll do is their lower their rate of what they're willing to pay because they know people were coming from other countries and do nothing.

And we started having these discussions and they was just like, now, I didn't I didn't know that we felt that way. And then they were explaining to me how they lived in Jamaica and how their families lived. As a young man, you think Bob Only, you think you same boat, cool runnings, it's all fun and games. They're not thinking of reggae, you know, you think Elephant Man, you know Shaun Kingston.

You're not thinking about the rest of the people who are living in like a third world country, who are willing to do anything to survive and send that money back to Jamaica. So I learned a lot about what they were going through their listening to their stories, and then they learned a lot about what my family went through going up through Jim Crow, because my biggest argument to them was like, Yo, you're talking about how lazy black people are, right, you all came here in the seventies.

Why your family didn't come here in the sixties and the fifties because it was Jim Crow and y'all wouldn't want to come to America during Jim Crow. So we fought for those opportunities that y'all came here for in the seventies. So they were respectful of that, you know, And it turned at first from a joke into a real serious discussion, like a real service discussion like that. You know. One thing I can appreciate um When I was younger, my mom and dad put me into a

school that was a private school at the time. It was actually we were both in Bethlehem Baptist Academy and it was an all black school, small private school back in Brownsville and Brooklyn. And what I loved so much about being in that school was that I was surrounded by other black and brown boys and girls who pretty much were just like me, whose families kind of aligned with, like, you know, moral values. What they instilled in us in

that school was just amazing. So shout out to Bethlehem Baptist Academy with Filth School and they really really raised some great kids, um. But they also made it a point to make sure that us as children knew our African history, African American history. They were very deliberate, and that's why I was able to learn a lot more about Black history, Like it was like Black History Month every day. And that's because because in a public school,

it's not in the curriculum exactly, you know. So I thought that was an amazing thing been in that situation and in that environment. But it's funny because now that I look back on it, UM, I could sense that there was a tension between some of the teachers in the school absolutely, the Black American teachers absolutely, and then the West Indian teachers, and yes they were cookie, but they were also too kind of like us versus them situation that was going on, and it really at the

time I couldn't pinpoint what it is. But it really wasn't until after meeting you and dating you that I realized, wow, that there, it really is, this this tangible tension that exists between Black Americans and West Indians. Well a lot of it too, is also because of the stereotypes that we have within our own cultures of being black. You know, like just being black is not just black, Like we're

not just black. There's different versions of black, So in those different subcultures, you know, there's stereo types that exist. Like I remember growing up in America and when you thought about Jamaicans or Haitians or Trinidadians or Africans, it was like, oh, they're they're not civilized, they're not educated. You know what I'm saying. All they do is smoke weed. All they do is drink. So it was like you think, you feel, as an American Black, that you're better because

they're coming from a smaller country. You know, and I know, there are some stereotypes, and that's what we were discussing with your dad. They felt like black people were lazy. So that's why Jamaicans were coming here to take those jobs because black people were not willing to do those jobs and they didn't want to work hard. That's why they had those issues in America. So those stereotypes about each other we had. You and I had to work to kind of dispel those stereotypes as our families started

to mix. Because when we first started dating, Christmas and Thanksgiving are huge to both of our families. And when you're dating, it's like do we spend time and your family do we spend time? In mind, so now you know, you tell your dad, you know what, we're gonna spend some time here for Thanksgiving. You want to come over

to me her family. Now, my parents got to go into this Jamaican version of Thanksgiving, in Jamaican anvincentition version of Thanksgiving, and it's like you, you're you, You're worried first of what it's going to be like when your parents come be her parents, but then you get excited because you know that next to the Turkey there is gonna be some curry goat, it's gonna be some roy, there's gonna be some pillow, and a couple of different dishes. So then you know, and you know my father loves

to eat, so you know that that's always good. So Scoop was like, curry good and D they have some roady outside Scoop that we call his dad's scoop. I was like, did you just say roady like R O D. I don't go. Don't got no d's And if you call it roady with the D, you're not getting none, So you better put the tea in the road. T by Okaye. She turned bad with That's what I love about it when she turned to West India. She can

turn the switch on and off. It's funny because growing up in Brooklyn and Flatbush particularly, he's been around West Indian people. And my Auntie Angie, who raised me after school when I was going to Bethlehem because she lived in East New York. She's a Guyanese old Guyanese Indian woman, and it was just amazing, like growing up in that environment and coming home and eating the food and being in it was just kind of like man like that that's part of that's part of the reason why I

probably love West Indian women so much. It was kind of infused in me from from young and then when you live in Flatbush, they called Flatbush little Jamaica. So I shout out to Bethlehem, shout out to Cellar Missionary Baptist Church was on album all. So you come out of album sitting in the middle of what is like little Jamaica. You know, they had the beef patty shops

before Golden Crust was huge. Put the beef in the patties, Like, I don't know what this pace situation is they have going on patties no shade, but shade Golden Crust, Like, where's the we need? We need some more beef in the patties. Pause. But growing up like that, I always always just had an affinity for West Indian coachure and

island culture right right right. It's funny because when I was thinking about this, I said, you know, I was looking at some articles and just reading about once I know what the topic was, and I came across um this article by a woman, her name is Susan Model, I'm assuming um, and it talks about West Indian prosperity if it is the fact or fiction, Because when I really look back and then I have even spoken to my mom, my dad, or even family members who have

come from the Islands to America, you know what was the motivation? Of course, the motivation is a better life. You foresee that there's opportunities in America that you can advance yourself and then either send money back home to help your family, or send money to then bring your family up here, or established some sort of life that out here went through. Yes, exactly. The eldest of six, you know, her mom and dad, her siblings were in Jamaica. They sent her to New York. She came up here

by herself. You know job she was seventeen eight. She was eighteen years old, just old enough to work. It was literally like a countdown until she was old enough to work. Um, they sent her to New York. She was working at a local burger king. Check this out. The local burger king she worked at on Church Avenue. Church Charlie was the owner, and my father and uncle worked in the same burger king. And remember your uncle, my uncle, and your mom worked together. I think he

hired my mom. Yeah, and how crazy is that so we date back to like our parents and uncles and stuff. But my mom came up and she was working a job at Burger King and then she was going to nursing school simultaneously. Because you know, if you West Indian says what island you from? You can have one of three jobs to be successful according to the West Indian standard. You can be a doctor, a lawyer or a nurse. That's where the story is. Anything outside of that, it's like,

what are you doing with her failure? What are you doing? But they really came up here because they foresaw the opportunity to advance. Um. And when I was reading more about you know, this article and a couple other ones, it was talking about, you know, our West Indians who come to America is super successful because they had the ambition to leave or were they forced out by family members? You know what I mean? What causes the West Indian

person to come up here and then be successful. But it may be too because they're like, you know what, by any means necessary, I'm gonna take this job. I'm gonna take several jobs. You know, we joke about Jamaicans have a magi, but it's like by any means necessary. I'm gonna because all these dollars add up, and as my mom says, every Michael make a muckle. That's a Jamaicans term. Any Yeah, So any little thing you get, you can put it together and it's going to create

an abundance. Um. But in this article, particularly want to quote this one um past one passage and it says the belief that West Indian blacks are more successful than African Americans first appeared in the nineteen twenties, shortly after these immigrants began arriving in the United States and recognizable numbers. Early justifications for this opinion included that West Indian immigrants who were more entrepreneurial, familistic, scholarly, and diligent than their

American or African American counterparts. Today, assumptions about Caribbean superiority remains widespread. A white male manager's comments illustrated public perceptions and it says, if I had one position open, and if it was a West Indian versus a Black American, I'd go with the West Indian because of their reliability and their willingness to do the job. They have a different drive than African American blacks. Wow. I don't know

if that made me feel some kind of way. I mean, I mean, this is and this was part of the discussion that I had with your dad and his friends, was that there is a residue from slavery that exists Black American. Absolutely, I'm not putting up with your ship where I feel like West Indians are more likely to be like, you know what, I just came from my island. I'm gonna come here and do whatever I got to do to make it. Black people feel like we've been

doing everything you'll ask for its free. I'm not doing that ship all. So, I feel like the difference in the attitude, right, the difference in the attitude makes it easy for a white person to come in and say, well, there, they work harder, you know what. You understand what I'm saying. And I feel like it's it's unfair to even pin one against the other because that creates the friction between the two. You see what I'm saying. And part of

me wonders is that strategic? Because also too, in my reading, I did see something somewhere I can't quote it right now, but it did talk about you know, is this a strategy by think of the white man to then pin and separate and segregate the black community. Well, I mean, we don't know what the motive is. But if you're thinking about if you're thinking about just finance, right and take it as a job and your work, your your owner of a job. And now you have these people,

you don't want them to create a union. You want to break apart the union. You divide and conquered. Right. So this, this country we live in, America is a capitalistic country that's based on margin. You've got to marginalize a certain group of people, you know, to make the bottom line the best for you. So if you can marginalize these people as much as possible, divide them as much as possible, created divide, it's easier to control them.

So we don't know what the you know, we don't know what the motive is, but it seems like it makes sense based on, you know, systematic oppression, the way the laws are created for black people in America. It seems that way. It seems like it makes sense from a business standpoint and from a systematic oppression standpoint. No, definitely, Um, I think that's the thing. And I feel like also to back in the Islands. Um, there's not really a

sense of racism that exists. You know, Like in talking to my mom for example, she felt like, you know, majority of the island is black, so they're or they really were the majority, there was no minority, whereas coming to America you now have to deal with being the minority. I think what really separates people back in the Islands is the socio economic status that you have, um, you know, for someone being like a groundsman versus like, you know,

having a better job or working in the hotel industry. Like, there's layers to it, so everyone is divided more so by money and not skin color at all. Um. You know, not to say that there isn't colorism that exists, because of course that that exists. Yeah, um, but that's not something that as West Indians coming to America, you really foresee that you're going to be a minority. And that's and I think that's where the disconnect comes from Caribbean

Americans excuse me, Caribbean blacks versus American blacks. Because if you're not dealing with that type of systematic oppression back in your homeland and then you come to America and just like all these black people aren't willing to do this. I'll do this right. It's kind of like you don't have the knowledge of the history of what has gone on. And as a Black American, I can't blame someone from another country for not knowing our history because there are

people in this country who don't know our history. If I didn't go to Bethlehem Baptist Academy, right, I wouldn't have learned about slavery. I wouldn't have learned about Jim Crow. And shout out to my mom, who is like, my mom has been so inspirational when it comes to me being socially conscious because my mom was one of the first classes that was integrated into James Madison High School. Yes,

in the seventies. She was busting, Yeah, she was busting from Crown Heist Brooklyn, busting all the way to Avenue p and they were chased out by bats and chains almost every day her first two years in high school during integration, which is crazy because those are stories that people act like was so long ago. And then when a West Indian person come in and say that black people are lazy, it's like, are you fucking kidding me?

My mother and father. First example, could have it with your mom, because your mom would be like, let me tell you right now. If that conversation happened, if your dad and his friends and my mom was there, my mother would have lost her money. My mother, my mother would have lost her mine and been like, devout, get your ship and let's go. Because that's that. She's that she feels that strongly about education. Should you know, she works for opportunity. She has now and she she loves

her community. But she's always big on understanding black culture. She's always the first one to text us remember to vote today or you know it's it's primary elections. So she takes her opportunity to be able to vote and be active in your community and take a stance and be able to tell your local officials what it is you want. And needy, I mean, she's start writing off names and districts and who you got. She knows all

the assemblymen, she knows all of the local governments. And that's because she's been doti in the movement itself, active in the movement. So you know, it's all about showing compassion for each other as cultures. And you know, we always I feel like after that discussion, have been able to really just join together and really appreciate who we are,

where we've come from. You know, I'm super proud of my heritage being you know, from the from the West Indies, and you know, Devout is totally like you said, DeVito looks at any opportunity to let people know how West Indian he is. I feel like I feel like I'm a RAS the hard Honestly, do feel like I'm wrong. Some of y'all have seen it. If you haven't, you have to check out the vlogs that we have on YouTube where we chronicle us going to Jamaica for my

thirty fifth birthday, which was epic. Okay, it was epic on so many levels. We had thirty of my friends and family who actually came out and um, you know, we took our children out there with us as well, of course, because it was a milestone for me. But I look for any opportunity I can get to make sure our kids know where they come from, because they got to know where the hell they go in and going to Jamaica with them was nice to you on

the beach and on the resort and everything. But after those festivities were over, We made sure that we a lott of time in our in our schedule itinerary to take them off the resort to go into Kingston, to go to the Bob Marley Museum for example, just the show, you know, because Jackson will always listen to his music and Cairo. You know, I think Cairo is a lost Marley.

Ye think, definitely he is. But we took them down there and it was an educational experience for Jackson to just see a different part of Jamaica that's not all the glitz and not all the glamour and the beaches and the resorts and the room service, but seeing you know, people who are just walking the street day to day and you know, getting some background on Bob Marley and what he did, and I know that documentary that we watched their really kind of I think we all felt something. Yeah,

I felt so connected to Bob. It sounds, but it feels like his spirit still existed and it's it's in his home literally, so you you feel it so much because you actually get to walk the grounds that Bob Marley walked and created so much content in music, and then you get to see the bullet holes from where they tried to assassinate him, And to me, having children made it that much more important for us to understand each other's culture because I have to be able to

teach my children, my boys, about mom's culture the same way I gotta teach about Dad's culture. And going to going to the museum and having watching their eyes as they looked around, and then Jackson quoting the numbers of how many children and how long he you know, he was on earth and when he died, and it's like, wow, he's really learning. But think about it. You know, how many people from Brooklyn have probably never been out of Brooklyn.

How many kids who were born in the States who have West Indian parents or coming from else have never seen And that's and I think it's important when you're blending cultures to take them back to where because I learned about even when we went to Elsha and it's funny because it's spelled h E l h E l L s h I r E and I was like, we're going to hell Shire. Look at I was like, we're going to hell Shire. Can you can you take

it to hell Shire Beach? And I was like to vow drop, Yeah, you know, I learned this in Jamaican culture. Any word that begins with H, take it off. Any any word that don't have no vowels, you add a H that has the vowel. Yes. So if you're gonna, if you're gonna, if you're gonna eat food to eat it, you gotta eat food to heat it, right, you see how you see what grandfather was like? Great with that you must heat food to eat it. Eating you don't you know, don't eat yet, you know, don't eat yet.

Heat be like okay, Grandpa, ready, heat it up the food and I'm gonna eat it now. But then I know I love it so devout, totally assimilated. Yeah, And we were on the beach front and you see all of these people who stereotypically you see them right, and post people would be scared because you hear all these stories of out Kingston and Jamaica. And I watched the times. I watched for a whole summer every day. So that's one of my favorite movies of all time. Big You're

Gone Too Far? Um, that's one of my favorite movies. So you and this banana, don't you ever? If I said, which was so impressive to me, I was like, you watched Daters, but I didn't see Friday or like the Last Dragon, or I would never really used to listen to like rap, I don't even know who you are. She she didn't listen to wrap what was going on in your house? Beg and soca all the time. I am at that because you know how to work that wast but plenty waste pelting. Yes, So so we go,

we go to Elsha and we pull up in a van. Case. Dad is first of all, he's like the mayor everywhere we go. He knows people, and this is what this is what I love about his spirit. Right, one time I had to drop him in land somewhere and yeah, your dad, right, So he's he's sixty plus years old, right, and he's like, y'all needed you to drop me here. So the address isn't picking in Brownsville. So I don't know if you guys noticed, but Brownsville is like the

hood of the hood of Brooklyn. So I'm like, yo, Pops, you sure this is where you're supposed to go, right, And he's like yeah, Like why, I'm like, why why am I dropping you to browns Ville? So we pull up into Brownsville, and I know people in Brownsville because I'm un the mentorship program in East New York and Brownsville, and the football team that we partnered with was in Brownsville on Mother Gaskin. So I see some of these dudes and I'm like, Yo, these dudes, dudes, I know that,

you know, they bang hard. So then your pops get out the car, mad smooth right here looking around, and then out here yo, Joe, Joe, and then he gives he put his hands up, and all these young dudes got their hands up at your pops like, yo, Joe, comes true, Come true. And then he looked at me and he's just like all right, I'm good. I'm good, I'm good. And he walking to this little basement party where all these young dudes. I'm like, yo, your father

is he really is. And y'all have to watch that blog because you will see my father turn up like no other, like he wants to know where we were going, what the next move was. Every step of the way. Party was amazing. He just had his drink covered because he always has his drinking hand and he's just chilling. So so when in Jamaica, we pull up to Elisha and the same thing. A bunch of young dudes come

up to the events slowly. And what I found out about the culture is that's their way of getting tourists and getting people to come to their restaurant. They have people at the door that greet them. Now it's not like the States where they greet you with a tuxedo and shoes on. They have one shorts, you know what I'm saying. They're smoking, you know what I'm saying. They come through and they're like, yo yo, yo yo, want to fish, you want fish, wish fresh fresh, labster that.

So then you know, Pops is in the front and the driver knows that one of your father's great friend, Linley, he you know, he knows the guy. So they drive us through. We following through this dark alley. It's not to get dark now, and we pull out and it's a bunch of huts and you see people sitting outside and they're looking at us. You know, we're looking at them, you know what I'm saying. But I'm always comfortable in those type of situations as long as if you don't know,

if you don't know, the cultures intimidating. So you know, we say a lot to everybody, what's up? What's up? And then we're going in and they start pulling out fish from the cooler that they just fished from the ocean outside, just caught them. So they're like fresh fresh, and that's always the best way to have it. Shout out to a mill seafood restaurant. Food was bombed and they treated us so nice, the kindest people, and the

food was fucking bomb lobster fish, it was bomb. You have a nice red stripe and the kids are running around with a bunch of other kids outside, and I'm like, yo, like this is the part of the culture that we don't ever get to see. You know what I'm saying, Because when you live in the States, you get character caricatures of other people's culture. The same way when you live in Jamaica, you get caricatures of what you think

the States people are. And it's not till you break it down to its purest form you realize how pure and nice we all are as people. Because my dad, you know, I said he was from St. Vincent I think Vincentian people are some of the most genuine, just

all around sweet, like good people. So you know, I was a little disheartened at first when I know that you had this conversation with my dad and I saw that you were bothered by it because I know my father means no harm and he really does not have a mean soul in his body, you know, Um yeah, he does not. Like he does he loves everybody. So first for you to have felt like I'm being attacked and these people are calling my people, you know, lazy and whatever it was, it really was just for lack

of knowledge and understanding. It's crazy how ignorance is when blending any culture, regardless of what it is. It's crazy how sometimes just ignorance and not knowing can completely create a divide. And once you break that down, it's a amazing how you can see things just flourish. Wow. But it was it was like a great experience going there. And we have to go to St. Vincent next. I know you've been to St. Vincent with Tiffany on your own. I went with my girlfriend with a little country trips.

Oh my god. Saint Vincent is such a beautiful island and I think it's super underrated. Um, but it's a beautiful island and the St. Vincent and the Grenadines, so they're surrounding islands. And it's funny because when I was in St. Vincent with Tiffany, I took her just because it was like, you know, a girl's trip. I was like, let's try here, you know, And at first I was kind of my mom at first was like, oh my god, why would you go to Saint Vincent. There's like not

much to do there if you're looking for activity. But this was a mommy trip, so we were looking to go and just kind of chill and veg out on the beach um and then I tell you, it's beautiful, and Tiffany keeps asking me when are we going to go back there? Surrounding islands, so the Grenadines around St. Vincent. So we took a boat over to beck Way, which

is another island that also has beautiful um. We wanted to go to Mistique, but then we couldn't go to Mistique that time because one of the royals I print somebody from just took over the whole island. They shut the island down because he was vacationing there. So I was like wow. I was like, I can't believe people are coming from all these different parts of the world to this beautiful island. So yeah, shout out to St. Vincent and y'all feel like I don't give you all

as much love. She'd be at home talking about so we got because my Saint Vincent, they're gonna sing me because you know, we talked about Jamaica so much, especially because I went there for my birthday and stuff, and that was mainly because it was easy to access. Um. Now I think St. Vincent has the international airport, so they're working on and so I have to worry about

flying into another country and getting getting the lead. Ye Kevin Little is known for like that song turned me on my body and That's going still goes hard and like every club that was that was high school days. I got some of my nicest dub to those songs. Oh sh you're fresh, She's fresh. But now yeah, so that he that song still goes hard. Actually put it on my Instagram the other day and he had damned me and was just like, Yo, you listen to my music.

I'm like yeah and love. So let me talking about coaches. What's the one thing you learned about Black American coaches since dating me that you feel like you didn't know before that you feel like like now you're like, Wow, now I understand a little bit about how you are, so you understand. Um, one thing I did learn about you, aside from that Friday is the funniest movie. It's not funny. I still don't really get the Last Dragon, but whatever.

That's maybe just don't don't, don't don't. Maybe it's an acquired I just gave me a black card back. I take that ship right back. But I do understand and I respect why you really appreciate the struggle and where blacks have come over time being around your mom and learning about her history and the things she's had to

go through. I understand why, um, you are the way you are with that, why you're so passionate about it, And I think that with the current climate in our country, it's next necessary for you two then teach our boys about this as well, and about you know their history and and and why it's so important as a black man to know certain things and being able to kind of sharpen their moral compass at this point because you're able to now impart on them things that you've learned,

and I admire that, and I've learned so much just from being a part of your family, because your family has completely opened their arms to me from day one, and they have embraced me as their own, you know, daughter, and um, I'm sure you can say it's vice versa now, No, absolutely, absolutely, your family has definitely embraced me. And I've learned a lot about West Indian culture outside of what I thought I knew, you know, growing up in Flatbush. Like I said,

it wasn't just all about bruck ups and row. That's because that's all I did back in the dance back in the day. And um, I love eating beef fatties, I love royalty, I love curry go oxtail like I just I love the food. I love the women. Um, But I learned so much about why people come to the States from these islands, and it's it's it's a different type of escape, you know, because black in America, when you're black, you're trying to escape persecution from police,

You're trying to escape systematic oppression. So you feel like there's nowhere else for me to go. I'm here in America, this is all I got. And when you're from a smaller island and you're trying to escape different levels of persecution from the government. Even though they may look like you, you know what I'm saying, you've been oppressed. You're like, I just wanted the ability to grow and prosper, you

know what I'm saying. So, and that's what I learned from your mom and your dad because their stories are very similar. Your father came here, you know, made money, sent back, helped your mom's family come here, and for them it was about owning property and not only owning property, but educating their kids when they have kids. And that's the biggest thing I learned about West Indian culture. Y'all

are all about education, you know. And there's there's a huge difference between Caribbean culture in American culture because in Caribbean culture, they're all about books. Because of where they come from, the educational systems aren't as good as Americans. So they're like, yo, you better go to school and get the books. Books, books. Where I feel like for Black Americans sometimes you're allowed to create. Like when I told my parents I wanted to go to school for speech,

communications and performance, they didn't look at me funny. They were happy toge, were happy I was going to college. And it wasn't you know, and they happy I got a scholarship. It wasn't like you know, but like the first generation to really go to a four year college. Yeah. Well my aunt, my aunt Monique shouting to my aunt Manique, Um, she went to Northeastern. I believe, Yes, she went to Northeastern. Played volleyball, played volleyball. She could have been a basketball play.

She's a beast athlete graduating on her degree. But she was the first in our family to get her degree. My mom didn't get her degree. My dad got his associates from Kingsborough, so in in that part of the family, I was the first to get my degree. But for them, they they're all their dream was like you could do whatever you want. You know, you're here, you could do whatever you want. Your father, when you told him he's getting in the TV, he was like, what the fuck you?

I think we have a podcast. Now we're working on like developing a show. And I think my father still to this day, does not understand what the hell it is. I'm no clue. He's just like, girl, you did not go to nurse in school. My sister totally like one up me, and she's a nurse. So no favorite. I was never the favorite, was always favorite, That is the truth.

And he will say it because he's like, conveem you nice and all, but Cary and he makes no jokes about it, like he'll tell y'all like, is my favorite. And then she now she's a nurse, like, oh my god, forget it, forget it. And I was like, Dad, but don't you understand, like I can make nurse like money and just not be in that particular film and still being successful. And he was like, being an entrepreneur, have

your own business. Why you've been a punch your five o'clock, You better punch your seven and three o'clock, do your do your work and and come home and be comfortable. And I was like, I ain't trying to just be comfortable.

I'm trying to be like successful successful you know. Um. But you know, you know it's funny that article that you read, right when they talk about they felt like West Indians had more entrepreneurial spirit, right, It's crazy to me because I feel like West Indians are more about titles, like even your mom, your mom is so much on titles because they came here with nothing. You know what I'm saying, and it's like I got to get this

title because that means something. So for me, I feel like that was actually the opposite because they weren't coming here just to create their own job. It was to work. Now they might have brought property, but you know, if your own property, you can become a realistic getting the real estate, being entrepreneur that way. But it was about working, like I want to work and have a title. I'm

a director, I'm a supervisor, you know, superintendent. It's about climbing the ladder whatever, that ladder of successes within that that you know, I'm going to start as a paralegal and then I'm going to be a partner and that I want to like there was always a ladder, I feel like, and that's true, Like I've I've definitely seen that with my mom, you know, and they're all about like working the way up as well to you know, starting at the entry leve well and then um always

further in education to then advance your title. Yep, definitely. It's just it's been great having the boys because they grew up in two different cultures and watching them do what they do as far as kids, but knowing that there Southern Black and Caribbean at the same time, because even with religion, and we can talk about we could save religion for another day because your parents grew up Seven Day events and my parents grew up Baptists. But

it's just been great to watch them learn and co mingle. No, absolutely and kind of accept both right and the ultimate. I feel like they even shouldn't be a us versus them more. No, it's definitely not Americans versus like West Indian Americans. Like the versus thing just really always put you in that ring where there has to be a dominant or there has to be a winner, and I feel like we can just learn so much from each

other from the richness of both. Historically, when people ask you what you are, you say, I say, I'm Jamaican of incension, right, and I say I'm American. Right. When they asked the boys, what are they going to say, right they are? I don't know, I mean we I don't think we've had this discussion yet, at least with Jackson because he's older. But I mean, I guess they would say, of course they're American, because at this point now they're what like a quarter Jamaican and a quarter

of incension. But I mean, they definitely are going to have to know. But they have a huge Caribbean background. Like if you think about it, that that half of their family was all born out of this country. They were all like their grandma who raised them, their great grandmother who raised them, was born here, you know, came here, their immigrants, their grandfather who raised them immigrants. I think that I think too, that they're going to have the same pride that I have, Like, you know, yes I

can I'm American because I was born here. Um, But whenever I'm asked, I usually identify with my culture because people will look at me be like, I don't really know where you're from? Where are you from? Or they can sense that there's like an act sometimes so they're like, Okay, where's that accent from? You know, depending on what I'm speaking about. Um. So yeah, I'm always And there's a

pride that I think the West Indian community has. Regardless of what island you're from, there's always this ongoing pride that culture. I think about Labor Day on Eastern Parkway, like that's one thing in Brooklyn that I love. It's like when all the cultures come together all the islands and everyone is repping so hard for whatever island it

is that they're from. So I think that sense of pride is something that was instilled in me um and I would love to, you know, instill that in the boys, because you know, Jackson has his moments too when he'll you know, drop some pots on and I'm like, whare a second you're paying attention to He's with Grandma all the time. He's with your your grandmother all the time. When your grandmother, you know, she speaks about to all

the time. But my thing is is also just identifying like your true essence, right because for for Black American people, and maybe this just maybe me in particular, but I am proud to be a Black American because we built this country. You can't take that from us. And then on top of building it for free, we're now learning how to control and manipulate the markets within it to

gain more power. There's a pride in that. Give me the comment that you feel like I can't necessarily claim America because I didn't build it, meaning my parents came from Cindy's Yes, can you elaborate on that for me? Because that can be that can that kind of struck a nerve a little bit. I think it's even I was born here. I think it's kind of clear. Okay, Okay, did you have to do the whole next? I did? I did? I did, because you're trying to attack me,

like I wasn't attacking. You know, it wasn't an attacked. But I just want to be clear like what you meant by that. Okay, Let's let's think about like this hot button topic right now in America, right, reparations right, and they talk about descendants of slavery in America. Where your parents descendants of slaves in America, So you get no reparations. But I married to you, so I can have if I allowed, if you're in, if you're a

good girl. No. But but being more serious, it's like I legitimate, like my my grandfather for in the Korean War and on the way back when they had POWs, my grandfather couldn't sit the pow sat because he was a black soldier in the American Army. You know how crazy that is? You know how crazy that is, Like

he went and fort in this for this country. But they treat the prisoners of war better than they treat the black Americans in America and then when you come back to America, they still treat you like shit like and I think people don't value that enough what black Americans have have gone through in this country, no disrespect. But your parents didn't have to go do that here. They came here after that fight was over and are now reaping the benefits. So it's not like you can't

claim America. But when people try to discredit what black Americans have done in this country to get us to this point, for me, it's try it a nerve like it really does strike a nerve because and and it did strike a nerve with your your dad and his friends because I wanted to be like lazy. We cannot discredit that, you know what I'm saying, We cannot discredit that and that, and then you know, I'm apologized if you took it the wrong way, because it could come

off a little bit kind of fucked up. I'm saying both of your parents, both of your parents were from here. Their descendants didn't build this country whereas my parents did. And realistically, it was just like a little bit of a measure of what are my son's gonna claim because I don't want my son's to feel the pressure I felt in high school where oh, you're from America, You're not cool because we're from islands and the culture is

great and celebrated. Black American culture is not celebrated the same way. So for me, when they say, you know, you know where you from, you you're not from an island, I'm Americans. Like, why are you trying to downplay because I went through that in high school. Oh you just American? What the fund does that mean? I'm just American like that? And it was a huge argument. It was a huge argument in school. One yeah, in Madison, because I remember

Flag Day. Flag Day was a big deal right in in in uh Madison, and everyone wore the flags for the countries they represented, right, that's the thing. Yes, so a water American flag one tim. And people just like because you are because I'm American, right, And they're like, also you repped in American And I'm like, yeah, well I'm American. And then they were just like that's that's kind of whack, Like how dare you represent America? Like

this is our day where in your country? We get it, there's your country, but you know, you know, and I was like, what you what do you like? What does that even mean? Kids? Which is you know, kind of getting at me, like, yo, you know, you're just American, Like like it's cool to be it's cool to be West Indian, but to just be American is like you

have no culture, you have no swag. And I want to and I want my boys to know, like, you have to find pride in the fact that your ancestors built this country for for the rights in this country that we live in. So say, you know, because it always happens. Sat Jackson grows up and he's either a football player, the president, or is an entertainment they're gonna ask him, you know what are you his Wikipedia page?

It's going to be very important. And if they say that he's of Jamaican descent and that's the first thing he says, you know, American blacks are gonna be piste off. And if he says that he's American and they don't mention that he's from Jamaican and Vincentian descent or he's not from St. Vincent, those people are going to be piste off. So it's like, how do we prepare our children to embrace both and rent both and identify because you you don't say you're American even though you were

born here in America. You don't identify American your family, and you really can't, like your family didn't fight for slavery or fight for it, Like you don't fight for American civil rights here. Your parents were in islands, you know what I'm saying. They weren't here, So I get why you say I'm Jamaican in intention, right, right, and usually say I was born here in America, but my roots are you know, which make making savings just to give a total picture of what exactly is happening here.

So I mean, I don't really foresee to like when it comes to dating culturally, like I'm thinking about our sons, because when it came to dating for me, my parents weren't like, oh well you have to date another West Indian or you have to date within the confines of They never put those kind of pressures on me. My mother was actually like, you ain't dating nobody, bitch. So it was just like she was just like, oh no, Like my parents were like super strict, you know, protective.

You know, thank god they were, because I have become the nice woman that I am to date because of that and my good old West Ending upbringing. I think upbringing tho is something that we can both kind of can compare and they're similar because I don't think in a West Indian household or in a Black American household, we took no ship like our parents on both sides

didn't take no ship. Manners was something that was very, very prevalent, you know, in the household, no talking back, religion, faith, Those are a lot of parallels that we did, which I think made dating for us, though we did have differences in the beginning, you know, like my father not knowing about the culture. That was easy for our families

to assimilate. Now, yeah, absolutely while dating because because the moral values existed on both sides, and when the moral values exist on both sides, easier trying to sit back and say, you know what I can write. He may be a little different, but I know that his daughter gonna take care of my son, and I know that their son is gonna take care of my daughter as long as the moral values exist, right, And I think

that's something that we paralleled in both households. When we talk about our upgramming bringing or the way our parents dealt with certain situations or even the school Beffle him that we went to, like whether the teacher was a West Indian teacher or the teacher was a Black American teacher. They took no disrespect, like that was just something that

was not tolerated. Um. So I think they made dating for us and then eventually marriage and now our views on parenting and the things that we tolerate with our kids kind of similar. So with the boys, though, you're going to make sure that they when they say you wouldn't have them say I'm Jamaican American, I'm vincentition America. Can Um, how are you going to have them identify? I think they Yeah, I think they should. They should definitely pick up the culture and be like, I'm Jamaican.

But since you an American, I like you like it. Coming up, we're going to get into some listener letters. But after these ads, this for the record. There it is a win for the ages. Tiger Woods is one of our most inspiring sports icons. In his story, it comes with many chapters. I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible and selfish behavior, but here it is the return to glory. This is All American, a new series from

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So let's see what we're talking about today. Oh, these are interesting, So they're not necessarily dealing with blending cultures, but it is kind of relevant because, um, the question is, what was the point where you all knew the leap of faith to start your own business? I guess so just a frame of differently, at one point do we notice start our own business though it doesn't necessarily deal

blending of cultures. But my father again being his like you know, get your nine to five, he could not foresee the businesses that we wanted to start, but but he did own property to supplement his income. He did, so he kind of we kind of did have that, and he was very smart because he was able to buy property in Brooklyn during the late eighties, and my mom worked really hard to make sure that they were able to do that and start that kind of fund education.

And yes, and gave me lots of opportunities. Shout out to Dad for that, um But yeah, what did we know that we wanted to start. This was easy for me playing in the NFL, Yes, because I always I always wanted to own my own part of what my mom and dad taught me. I always want to get into real estate. But I never forget the end of my third preseason, I had the best preseason I ever had in the NFL. The first year in the NFL, I made the team, then cut, then put on the

practice squad. I didn't made the team play the rest of the year. Second year, I didn't even play in the preseason because I was hurt, and I made the team, was put on the pup. The third year, I had the best year and I got cut. And what that showed me was that I never wanted to live my life where my livelihood was dependent upon another man's decisions. So for me at that point, it was I need

to own my own business. I need to make my own money, because if I'm constantly going to work and hoping that I'm going to continue to get a check by jumping through the hoops of someone else, at any given time, they can just say, Na, we want to go in another direction. You don't get laid off, and that new management doesn't come in and they they everyone's a wash that I couldn't do it. And you know, it's funny, I did not necessarily have that business acumen

in the beginning. I didn't foresee the business side of things and how it would flourish. Um. I think too, because it was always ingrained in me to be sure that I had a stable job, whatever that job was. Again like my dad, you know, working in the hospital, my mom being a nurse. Like they wanted to make sure that I was able to um sustain the lifestyle by having that guaranteed quote unquote money. But then when you really think about it, it's like, what exactly is

guaranteed money you know? Um? Or is it really guaranteed? You know? And the turning point for me, particularly with business and why I wanted to start my own was moving back to you know, New York after the NFL

was over and developed wanting to start his business. I was working at Matt Cosmetics, um as you know, an artist and as a manager, and I was kind of working my way up the ladder there because again I was taught bout my family, like started the ground and you work your way up the ladder, and and that's

what I always did. But you know, I think at that point, being with you and hearing how you were starting a business and being so inspired by that, I thought to myself, you know what, I'm about to flip this whole makeup situation. I'm going to go in there. I'm gonna learn the craft more. I'm going to hone in on my skills. I'm gonna work that ladder, learn about being a leader, learn about how the business works, learn about revenue calendars, and this, that and the third.

So that way, I can then give myself the opportunity to step away from the confines of working for Frank and Frank who are the owners, and then start my own business where it can be more lucrative for me. I can have the flexibility that I wanted to have. You know, I will never forget that Thanksgiving where I had to leave the family. Jackson was still a baby at the time, and I had to leave the family because at this point now it was Black Friday, that's

when the store was opening. It like midnight, So I had to leave Thanksgiving dinner to get dressed, put my all black on makeup on, and I literally cried in your arms, and I was like, I don't want to have to go to work, like so unfair. I cannot enjoy this holiday with my family because I have to go make that money on Black Friday, which is not even like Friday. I think now to the point where there's not even a Thanksgiving Day anymore. People are having

to work on Thanksgiving because of making money. So I said, you know what at that point, you know, I told you how I felt about it, and you were like, Babe, we're gonna work so hard. I'm gonna make it so that you don't have to miss another Thanksgiving and so said so done. So you know, that was really at the point when we knew early on that we wanted to start our own businesses. Yeah, it was just pretty

much wanting autonomy over our lives. Our lives, yeah, and wanted to be there and be active in our children's life as well, and to be able to work on our acting careers. You know, well, well, actually which is you know that that answer actually seguates us into the second one. Uh. Someone asked, you know, talk about DeVos post on I g to take care of home and

let you do your thing. Recently, I did, I did post recently about it, and um, this post kind of came from a question that was asked when we were at Broccoli City. Um, a young lady asked, you know, what, what is the best way or how do you guys

support each other, you know, in your own dreams? And the post came from that because I was sitting back and I think, and I answered her question that day about how we dig each other up, and we talk a lot about each other's projects when we're doing projects. If if we're doing projects, with what I can see,

there can be some cross promotion, I'll mention codeine. But then I really really alized afterwards that the best way that I could support my wife is by just getting out the way and making sure everything else is out

of her way. You know. So oftentimes it's left on the women to be responsible for take care of home and the kids, you know, And I've been I've been guilty of that sometimes, Like when I was the breadwinner and I was really focused on my career, on my craft, it was like, Okay, can you just focus on this? Can you just do this so I can focus on that,

And in doing that we were able to prosper. But then part of me realized that and there's things that she wants to do that you know, I have to kind of take time away from what I'm doing to grab that so that she can focus. So for me, it was kind of like, we're trying to build this empire together, and yeah, Codeine probably could handle all of home stuff and I could go on and flourish, right, But how dope would it be is if while I see she's funishing, let me just grab the kids real quick.

Let me pause when I'm doing and he paused real quick, Let me grab the kids, let me take care of home perfectly. Example, when you you you booked your first Netflix uh deal to be a key makeup artist on

the show, Ye shout out to us. It's proud of you had to take on that whole project makeup artist for a whole month while they shot this show for I think it was twenty days or twenty two days and literally long hours you know on set here there for like anywhere between twelve to fifteen hours per day, so I literally did not see my husband and my

children for an entire month. Um the Devote knew this was my opportunity to you know, get some experience in the field you know, makeup, to be on an actual set, to work with some actors as well. It was great for me too as an actor to now see another side of it how things are being shot. So it was really like a hands on learning experience for me and also away for me to do my makeup. I had my team, you know, we were cohesive, we were

working together. Devot ended up booking a role in that series as well, So it was just really great at that time because it was like all hands on deck. So between Devot and my family, they were able to just hold a hold down the fort so I can then flourish in this opportunity, and I think the tide shift for us a lot depending on what the opportunity to Devout me have an opportunity to capitalize on something, so I have to hold the kids down on What I appreciate about you is that you never I never

feel oppressed in this relationship. I never feel oppressed within the household because even though sometimes you were, you're direct with telling me what you need and it may come across as like, Okay, I'm gonna need you to do X y Z. I appreciate that you're transparent about that. So I know, Okay, Devout needs this to be his best self right now, So I'm going to do that

to ensure that he can be his best self. And I can appreciate that you're willing to do that, but it makes me that much more prepared to do it when you need it. You see what I'm saying the rest because absolutely, like I say to myself sometimes like yo, this woman took a year and a half off to have a child from TV, then while taking a year and a half of come pregnant and had to take another year and a half off to have another child and both of them are my boys. Is to help

build our legacy. It's like, if she needs a month to two months to focus on just her career, I have to be willing to do that, you know what I'm saying. I think I have to like the most helpful things you've done too, Even if you couldn't step in. You made provisions for the kids with like my mom, you'd be like, my, you know, k needs to go to the gym? Is there a way for you to

come back after? So that way? Yeah, your mom is my go to when your dad to Yeah, and Brian like Jackson, you know, because family, Yeah, they really just help so much. So even if you are not there to do it, you can foresee that I need the help, and you'll reach out to all of our forces and be like, hey, who is free to help us out real quick? And they're usually so great about you know, pures.

So it really is the village, Like the village makes it possible for me to step out, you know, and just grab the kids in the house and say, you know, let's go go get the bag, baby, just go get the bags, all the bag, you know, because you bring home the bacon. You know, even though I don't eat pork no more, I know, I know, I definitely to me, I don't eat pork. I only eat bacon every now and again. So you just said that bacon is its own ented. Okay, bacon, April, don't eat it all the time.

Let me tell you all about this girl, yo, we we go, I've got where we were, and she was just like, can I see your vegan options please? I'm like trying to be healthy today. So we have a black bean burger. She's, oh, a great, great greade. So she's like, let me get the black bean burger with bacon. I was like, what what are you doing? I felt for it, like the very blue boom that I felt for baking. It just happens. The rationale behind it was so dope, though, she goes. She goes, listen, nobody make

food better than vegans. If you can make an all vegetable meal tastes man good. Imagine if you add bah. I was like, you right, though, but you're right and tastes good. Let me know who's doing that out there. Make sure I'll come in and let me know who has tried to put bacon on their hashtag vegan with bacon. Yes, all right, listen to this. I always loved those. Yes, um And if you want to be featured as one of our listener letters, email us at dead as Advice

at gmail dot com. Yes, that's dead as Advice. D E A D A S S A, D V I C E at gmail dot com. Baby what's your moment of truth? Um for this whole what's the vows truth when it comes to blending cultures? Are just talking about you know, we're all a part of the African diaspora, Wakanda forever, all that good stuff. Let me know what what what? What's your takeaway from this whole conversation? My My moment of truth is to take time to embrace the culture of the people that you're around, even if

it's not your wife, significant other, your friends. Take time to embrace their culture because what you think you know about their cultures, you probably don't. And all the caricatures about their culture that are the stereotypes that that are what you think or hold as true, can be so much deeper if you just take the time and don't only just do it for them, do it for yourself, because the more you learn, the better you can become.

And I want to be able to know as much as I can about as many people so I can share that with the boys. Yeah, taking the time to really dispel the myths surrounding any culture, and that's just not Caribbean culture. With a culture whatever you want to call it, it can be, you know, Asian culture, it can be African, it can be European, like whatever it is. Really taking the time to dispel the myths will make

you a well rounded person as well. And I think it's just more more about humanity and that circumstance, so you can really get to understand people better. Um like what. I like what you said that though more about humanity, learn other people's cultures so you could be a better human. I like that. I like that better human, like love thy neighbor, like you can legitimately love thy name, or in authenticity at that point because you feel like you

can respect where they've come from. Yeah, that might be my moment of truth. You know what, Ignorance is not bliss in this circumstance because you don't know about a culture. If you don't know, like how my father and his friends did not know about the struggle, it's not bliss. It's actually pretty sad, and it's pretty sad. It is

pretty sad. It is pretty sad. So, you know, as youcate yourself had these conversations instead of talking about you know what just came on on Love and Hip Hop last episode, how about you talk about somebody's culture, you know, share a little tip or something you know, invite them over for a meal that they may not have had before and introduced into a different way of doing things, or or something that's specific to your culture. I like that.

I like that. I like that. Do you all like that? Well? If you like that, be sure to follow us on social media. That's I am devoted. I A M D as in David E V as in volume A L E. You're so obnoxious with the spelling of your handle. I liked le. People can spell and cadine, I am doing H A D E. And is a Nancy I A M. And if you're listening on Apple podcasts, be sure to rate and subscribe and tell friends. And dead Ass is a production of Stitcher is produced by T Square, Stephanie

Karauke and Dinora Opinion. Our executive producer is Chris Manning, and we'd like to give a special thanks to our recording engineer Jared O'Connell, our sound designer Brendan Burns, and studio manager Ashley Warren. We'll back. I'm Drew McCarry and I'm David Roth. We have a podcast scoring on right now as part of the stitchen Net. We're called substraction that's available everywhere. Getting podcast at Stitcher, Spotify, Apple Go. Listen right now to the distraction, right now, it's out.

Do it please,