Radio City Playhouse - The Plotters

Radio City, New York.

From Radio City, New York, where every day famous stars of stage, green and radio bring America the greatest and entertainment. The National Broadcasting Company presents Radio City Playhouse Attraction fifty six. And here is the director of Radio City Playhouse, Harry W.

Jenkins.

Thank you, Fred Collins, and good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. Today. As a change from our.

Usual serious, dramatic fair, we're presenting a comedy now because we feel that a sense of humor is a rather personal thing, different with each individual. We are leaving it entirely up to you in your own living room to laugh or not as you see fit. In our efforts to amuse you, we have managed to obtain the services of two of the funniest actors we know, mister Ian

Here then, is our show.

Ian Martin as Porter and Arthur Cole as Thurston in the Plotters Attraction fifty six on Radio City Playoffs.

There comes a point in every married man's life when the nostalgic memories of being single drive him almost out of his mind. Usually, this period of emotional disturb and begins with the coming of spring.

Spring, but spring for Thurston.

Holloway and his friend and neighbor of Port Gordon means nothing, nothing more than a time to dream about what might have been.

Just sit on Thurston's front.

Port swing, read travel folders and wish and wish.

Listen to this person Wow, glorious bathing, gala, social life, the magic of the Caribbean, windblown shinny days and romantic tropical movement night. And then there's a picture of a man and a woman standing on a balcony and just looking away out into the sunset.

Oh.

I first think it just breaks my big fat old heart.

Very shit porter.

But all that goes on in Nassau nas not only the Nassau Porter, many other places, so many other places. We've missed all of it, all of it, and girls too, all kind shapes and sizes of girls.

Girls.

Girls.

We're old first and that's all. Oh No, we've been doing this promised fifteen years, talking about travel faraway prices number when we planned to go around the world, around the world, save money for five long years. Men than you I know you married l you stopped.

I was infatuated, but you weren't much better.

I know you married baby.

I know well on the rebound, first rebound, pure and simple.

It couldn't help. But oh, sir, I don't blame you.

Why don't have a chance.

For fifteen years we've worked and slaved for those two women.

Yeah, fifteen years of nothing that sums up.

Our lives, our miserable, inconsequential, dull, boring lives.

Yeah, hey doesn't know this.

It says the yield of francis back.

Where was it?

Oh?

Look, look'st here's one of them. Hawaii, Hawaii. He didn't like to I'm palm treaties and everything. Hawaii.

The wives are coming back.

Oh look at them revolting.

Isn't it like we were holding and know just what they're gonna say?

We should We've been listening to them for fifteen years.

Bloody all ask us if we might have walked to the drug store with them, the drug store.

By the naturally, mine was bigger than hers because she.

Didn't use any fertilized fertilize.

But that is mean, Letty. After all, everybody knows that you've got the biggest violence in town.

Biggest violence is.

Right, you boys want to walk to the drug store and we need some toothpaste and I want to sowda.

Oh that sounds like adventure.

Letty looks travel magazines again.

Honestly, you too are some similar Oh never mind, baby, there's like a couple of school boys playing puffs and robbins.

You think and grow up, wasn't you?

That's a good thing, that that you and that that's all for.

Going on of shoes in the morning.

Stand you hear what they said?

Yeah, school boys.

I sure must have been a schoolboy when I married Letty.

I see it, isn't it.

We hate it.

It's just that there's such bag bags, is right? Sure? I start.

And fifty you're fifty one. We've each got about twenty three years expectancy. Every Sunday we'll sit.

And talk about Hawaiian and that'sa on Indo China and not do a thing, not a thing.

No, we won't not for another twenty three years. I just couldn't stand it.

Let's do it.

It's not too late yet. We've got twenty three years ahead of It's just let's go around the world.

You're crazy. Letty gets sick in the CANONGI who.

Said anything about letty?

Get the porter? Right? What do you mean?

Leave them? Leave the flat?

Leave letty?

Yeah, leave them, both of them with their toothpaste and their fertilizer and their their African violence.

At the point, fifteen.

Years is all any woman has a right to expect.

Do.

That's the word we've been forgetting all these years.

Do.

Let's just stop talking about it and do it.

You're right, porter, you're so right.

Work, we'll do it.

We'll leave them flat.

Yeah, yeah, don't let them cough at our travel magazine while we're in the China seeds are.

Sleeping on the steps of the tax man.

Right about money?

Ah, money, money, Yeah, well, I.

Uh, we can work a way around the world, can't we not made for her.

I couldn't work my way around.

The block o money sometimes I hate it me too. We we need thousands, thousandsmore.

M hm.

It was great while it lasted.

Yeah, money, I got one hundred and eighty five dollars in my bank.

That's nice.

I got sixty that's nice.

Fifteen years working, betweens, we can't even waste.

Three hundred dollars all person. Yes, I got ten thousand dollars worth of insurance.

And baby, that's nice.

Yeah, I've got six thousand, little lady, that's nice.

Yeah.

We could go a long way on sixteen thousand dollars, couldn't we?

Yeah, yeah we could.

Provocative, isn't it very provocative?

Porter?

Yay?

But how Thurst and how they're both as healthy as hogs. As she goes all the way down the stairs, I guess I gotta go take a.

Work, baby, mm hmmm mmm.

And I guess I might have phoned the doctor.

No, I'll wait fifteen minutes. Men are phone doctor.

Oh, oh, very very baby, you are right? Oh help me, you're all right?

Me up?

Oh, I phone the doctor. Baby, you needn't. Oh it's no father, I do that for anybody.

Help me up the rip that rub at the top of the stairs, and.

I caught my heel. I could have killed myself.

Yeah, it could have.

Let you ready, of course it's me.

I told your you rubber boots were in the garage, honestly first, and you just don't look the things. They were right where I said they were. They want me to he rubber boots.

Anyway, I thought I might go fishing with Porter.

I got holes all over the bottoms and you know it.

Oh here they are dirty old things. Send me out to the garage and look for something that stairs. You're right in the face, say well, write where I said they were. Oh, I'm going to bed.

You're coming thirsty.

When you stopped looking at those travel folders, went on some more with the native girl on the front is positively Upsetcene all right. And by the way, when I came out of the garage and closed the door, that horseshoe right above the entrance fell and almost hit me on the head. He'd better nail it up again. It might have killed me.

Yeah, I know, porter, I don't come me first, and I can seem coming in the face. No locker, Oh I sure, mister baby fell downstairs all right, but she wasn't even bruised.

He relaxed her muscles.

I guess sure.

As tough, tough and destructural, iish tiny, no, sir, not by a long shots. Well, you're coming over to my place tonight.

We will spend some time at my work bench in the basement.

He got an idea for what have I got a night for what?

You'll see you all this time next week we'll be leaving for some more with sixteen thousand dollars.

It's some more the lens of adventure, rare en.

Gentlemen, traffic lads in the blues, sir, and first, and I forgot to ask you, when.

You and Laddy come over tonight, would you do me a famous sure reporter? What when you bring along your rips?

Are I want to want?

What kind of want?

Is it?

It's like a steel maybe my saws. Maybe there's a spike in it. Spike spike to hold a step under the two places?

Or is that to wait about sellar steps?

I don't know, it could be.

I had to think I spent the last half hours so on through a spike.

Well, I guess if it was a spike, all the teeth.

Would have been broken, just like there's.

See what you mean?

Well?

How about it?

I'm saw on the top three steps on us through. I mean, I wish we had something besides.

The tape measure to measure it.

How fi do you figure half.

Thousand off front? I figure when they crashed.

Through this step, they'll fall eight feet nine and three quarter inches.

Is that enough?

What's the best we can do?

Unless you want to dig a hole? In the cellar floor to get an extra footus on me.

I don't think we'll need it eight feet nine and three quarter inches and the solids are met or to do the trick, probably bust the cement.

Don't go right through the achina.

Something just occurred to me.

How can you be sure they'll both fall?

Wow?

Uh, I'll say something about how they should take each other's.

Armor or something.

Well, one might see the other fall and have kind of stop.

Well, now, look that's the risk. We'll have to take it. At least it's a step in the right direction, if you get what I mean. I want to take where I'm.

Ready one of the Sis're careful, don't break it.

Maybe I'll go through that like a nice blue brother.

Let's call it sure if it's ready, Oh the lights turn up like oh.

The light I forgot the person.

Then we go again, second, try again, let's hope.

So shake on it.

Poor old friend, letty baby.

What partner? And I want you girls to come downstairs?

Why should I tell her?

Say?

We got something to show up, and we got something.

To show you, we'll bring it upstairs.

We can't bring it upstairs?

What tied up?

We can't bring it upstairs because it's tied up.

Come on down, seller, baby, we got.

Something really arrested to show you. Why person, turn on the light.

Oh we can, well, I haven't went.

We can't turn on the light because it glows in the dark. We can't see the stairs.

Hang on to.

Each other's arms. Oh, my dear, here we come.

Question.

Yes, porter, why do you think we'll getting out of the hospital?

The nurse said, next Monday. How's your arm all right? Taking the cast off tomorrow?

That's nice?

How's your head?

Oh, they're taking advantages off today, that's nice.

Oh. It certainly was a surprise, wasn't it.

We'd only known that fall right on top of us, We could have backed off more.

Yeah, it was.

It was that falling step that broke your arm when.

I clipped it right and two.

Oh terrible past. Thanks.

I'm glad we got a semi private together.

Yeah.

You give me another one of Baby's saltwater kisses.

Oh.

Thanks that.

They're hard to chew, but the taste.

Yeah.

Got a rasper Man in the hospital.

It gives you time to think.

Yeah, I'm planning at this time for Yeah.

Look, don't you like.

You're not weakening?

Are you.

We can't let a little miscalculation deter us, can we?

Well I suppose we shouldn't.

I have thought there's something food.

Yeah, all in good time for our own friends. All in good time.

Oh, by the way, I sent the nurse out for the latest copy of Holiday magazine this month. It's Mozanique, Africa. Yeah, the nine, the pervs, the sink clear patres pnuts.

Nothing. Tell me, Thurston, what is your plan this time?

All right? Quarter, I'll tell you now.

As soon as we get out of the hospital, we will suggest to the girls that we take holiday.

See just a week.

But if we've both been shacking up and the doctor says we've got to have a rest, see now, the girls will say where are we going?

And that's what we fool them?

But why I had?

The follow wants to go by me and so, but why I had before? So we just got out of the hospital. I think you'd showed me some consideration.

Well it's so nice as wick an Angsy lawn.

Or we can go to Wicked Angley some other time.

But why you'll love it, baby.

We can take pictures and watch it war onto the line after all, dear, it isn't often one has the chance to stand on a cliff and looks straight down for three hundred and twenty six feet.

All right, first man, we better be getting back to the gards. We can't stand as talking on five.

But I've got suspicion in a minute for your old friend. In a minute. I was just figuring out how far that insurance will go. Yeah, but lay yeah, see how much we spent getting into Japan and seen it's sixteen thousand. Let's certain, well we still have thirteen thousand, five hundred.

Only got the hon alula tat you said Japan.

H Oh, yeah, that's right, fifteen thousand, five hundred left in Japan.

I hope there's sixteen thousand and last dollarway around the world.

Like it might be fun to get standed eh in a warm country, maybe Egypt, Egypt, make friends with some slow eided Egyptian.

Princesship, Egyptian Egyptian John slow eye, only the Johnny.

Oh well, anyway, it'd be fun very fast. I'd like to see us living in Cassup.

Can't you just see us?

I'm riding a camel into the French quarters.

Yeah, Thurston, but right now we're riding a day coaching to the American quarter of Niagara Falls.

I was at the falls.

Now, why don't you talented with this far?

Don't flop.

Oh, it's going to be done before we get there, Potter, Why don't you talented with this far?

It was this far a porter letty, Baby, please be patient. I know it's around here somewhere, but after all, I haven't been here for years. I'm just about ten much as I know it's right around here somewhere. Now it's a flat led your rock about fifteen feet square, and.

You get the most marvelous it'll be dark by the time we find it.

Impatient, baby, always there right over there?

Right, come on, girls, that much longer? Now, just a few Dorothy, hold this branch now, go ahead.

Lady, thank baby.

I wan't just tell us it was this Go ahead, baby.

Don't you get away behind us.

We won't.

This is it?

Hey, this is it.

Girls in there, I want to put your smile out of there. Just smell it.

Geez.

There isn't that a magnificent you know, isn't it?

It's too dark?

Oh, it's just right.

What do you think We're too far away from the falls?

I thought they'd make a big roar.

I think it's perfectly, just perfectly.

Now those are the Canadian falls to the right. We're closest to the American Fall.

And how can you tell right?

Berby?

Can't be sarcastic with Ford Thurston.

Well, why ain't you tell us over this?

Par versus gone to a lot of trouble, haven't you?

Thirston?

Oh it was worth it, partner, it was worth it. Now I wish we could have seen all this in daylight or there.

I wouldn't have done a tall but come out closer to the edge now, leady it it's thrilling.

That looks straight down.

No, thanks, don't go and look over the edge.

No, this is fine.

Back here is just fine. How about you, Berby, come on and look down?

I asked you feel as if you were looking into another world. He's three hundred and twenty six feet straight.

Now make me daisy, she's fast.

It's flight, all right. So we've seen the view.

So let's get out of here and go back to the hotel.

Over we can.

Oh, look, they've turned on the search flights. They've turned on the search lights on the Canadian Fall. Let me not move over this, sure, hit, Partner, get.

Letty more rooms.

I'm not sure Thurston and all that.

It is rather pretty bad. I mean, but there's gonna we'll step back so you girls can have a good command corner and just take.

Them out of horse poll. I got it with handle powers. A matter of fact, I think it's a chinne wall. Anyway, it's terribly competent.

Okay, there's no palace?

Is it Thad timing out here?

Oh?

Look at him standing there so unsuspected, sad as.

You're not weakness, No, not me? Shake for good luck, porter.

Hold on, there's my friend, see waife port on a picture.

Work again? You take baby, I'll take lady.

Yeah, no the other way around. You kill my wife and I'll kill you as. It doesn't seem so bad that way. Okay, just a quick rush in a heave.

Are you ready?

Ready?

Let's go over.

But surely, ladies, you must have some idea why your husband's wanted to commit suicide.

No, we haven't done.

I don't understand it.

I have been ten years with the Niagara Falls Police, and I just don't understand it.

Thurston had an aversion to cucumbers, Surely that.

Wouldn't be the reason.

Now you're sure. You can't tell me anymore about how it happened.

I can't talk about it anymore.

Well, as I told you, the lights went on. Lady and I were looking and suddenly we heard a sort of funny noise.

Lddy and I took a couple.

Of steps towards each other, and suddenly they just.

Whiz right past us.

I thought the Zemer was lovely, just the way they would have wanted it, both coffin, side by side. Yes, this house just doesn't seem the same. I don't think I can stand it without Porter. I know, Letty and they did first and have any insurance?

We had twin policies six thousand dollars.

Oh, that's nice. Did Porter have any We had twin policies too, ten thousand dollars. That's nice.

Yeah, it means we're sixteen thousand dollars between us. Yeah, So what are we gonna do?

Baby?

We can't just sit around this town the rest of our lives.

I know, Letty, I know, poor dear boys with big travel folders.

Travel, that's all.

They wanted to do.

Here.

Look at this swell, oh.

Glorious bathing gala. Social life The magic of Caribbean wind blown sunny days and romantical.

Topical moonlit nights.

Oh, and here's a picture of a man and a woman standing on a balcony looking away out into the sunset.

Wouldn't it be wonderful?

Baby?

Yes, we could go clean around the world on sixteen thousand dollars.

And looking further on it says the terrifying excitement of deep sea fishing combined with the romance of wrong the nights.

You have just heard the plotters, a story of murder offered with apologies to all crime shows presently enjoying high hoopers. The two vile killers who met their just desserts were played with great restraint and emotion by Ian Martin as Porter and Arthur Cole as Thurston. Vague number one, alias le He was played by Briana wrayburn Bag number two, alias Baby, was played by Mildred Clinton. The short smart part of the detective was played with the usual consummate

Are presenting two separate and very different.

Scripts of a quarter hour each under the title Duets. The first is a soft and gentle love story called The Lake, the second a truly terelefying suspense.

Story called Collector's Item.

Please be with us for Duet next Sunday, Attraction fifty seven on Radio City Playhouse.

Good Afternoon, Everybody.

One of America's top comedians, has taken over one of radio's top quiz show. The result a hilarious half hour on Eddie Catter's Take It or Leave It Every Sunday on NBC. Yes, now the time to fall in love all over again with the propeyed Master of wi Eddie Catter on Make It or Leave It tomorrow night on NBC. Fred Collins speaking, You're tuned for the Stars on NBC.

Mm HM