Transcribe Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage. Kathy Lewis Elliott Lewis, two of the most distinguished names in radio, opening tonight in their own theater, starring in a repertory of stories of their own. And you're choosing radio's foremost players and radio's foremost plays. Drama, comedy, adventure, mystery, melodrama.
Ladies and gentlemen.
Mister Elliott Lewis.
Good, evening, may I present my wife, Kathy Good Evening. Tonight is our opening night, and tonight is the first day of the new year. So we're going to do a comedy for you to start our new series.
Something like a spray of confetti to go with the season. A story about a young man and his wife in nineteen fifty three.
Nice people, not rich, not poor, happy with each other, you know. Nice.
So tonight we present String bow Tie by Morton Fine and David Friedkin. My name in the play is Gerson Hapsmith.
And I'm Laurie Hapsmith, and.
We're married and we live in New York.
The opening scene has to do with Laurie. She's got a seat on the Seventh Avenue subway. It's New Year's Eve, afternoon, and she's on our way home from work. At the moment, she's upset because the seated man next door is working the crossword puzzle and doesn't know the three letter word for the web footed diving bird of the Arctic Sea.
Laurie knows awk.
M sixteen down. It's uk auk now extinct. It's very cold in the Arctic. Here's the paper.
You work it out, yes.
Thank you.
By that's Laurie.
Easy to get along with, even on a subway where people are pretty tough to get along with. To make a point out of it, Laurie in a way she knows, makes herself smaller so that very large woman will have ample room on the seat.
You crowded, dear No, not at all. Do you have a pencil? Oh sure, sure, Dearie.
Wait, I'll find it somewhere. I got it, hears done place at my face? Oh here, thank you. I like to wear Crossford puzzles on her way home.
Oh thanks, they're extinct now, Dearie.
Yes, I know swy which one honey across or down upstair? On the advertisement where see the one between the termite service and the cheese crack is saw wee Oh.
You mean the picture of the man in a string bow tie sitting at.
The piano schezzo a man's cologne to quicken the pulse of women.
Oh you know.
Something, why I understand perfectly the emotions of those four women seated at his feet.
Oh look at that man, dearie. Uh huh.
Let me know when we get the Times Square. Yesterday I ended up in Bronx Park just staring at him. That fella's a real beauty.
Do you really think so? Huh? Just me?
We all over town, ladies standing around staring, admiring. Oh no, wonder the way he sits there at the piano, hands poised over. Who knows what strange melody, the grace of that fellow.
The passion is my husband.
Down to his fingertips, smoldering written all over him.
He's my husband. Ah honest. What's his name? Gerson?
Gerson?
Gerson? What? Gerson? Halfsmith? Dearie, what let me ask you something? No? So we honey, this is Times Square? Who needs it?
I've got a little shoping to do in Bronx Park. Gerson, I'm home, Gerson?
What are you doing?
I was trying to ride a slogan for the agency what account lempkey water biscuit account. It's gonna be tough. What rhymes with lemp key? Mh give me here, Laurie him.
I want to tell you something lover her. It happened again today on the subway.
Did I have a big house mobbed?
Then there was a woman who sat next to.
Me, blonde brunette both.
Oh honey, you're the heartbeat of the subway circuit. You know what that woman said about your picture? Zoue.
You don't know the half of it.
Tell me the half of it.
Mister Honeywell at the agency called me in and said they formed a fan club in Bronx Park.
Do me a favor, Gerson, Sure, kiss me anytime.
Oh five million quickening posts in New York.
Gerson, you're my man?
Yeah, baby, Baby? You jealous?
Why should I be jealous? Just to be missus Hapsmith is all I ever wanted?
Crazy the way it happened four years ago and the model didn't show up, Mister Honeywell tapped me for the job, pulled me away.
From my typewriter, thrust a string bow tie.
In my hand and said this is it, Hapsmith.
No, No, he didn't.
He just told me to climb into the bow tie and run upstairs and sit in front of the piano.
Four years ago, and they just released it. Now.
My pictures in every bus and subway in New York. You know what mister Honeywell said to me today.
He asked you for the bow tie.
No, he said, this is it, Hapsmith. We've just landed the nine star meat account. I want you to pose for it in mutton chop whiskers.
Oh no, you won't, not my gerson, Not in mutton shop.
That's what I told mister Honeywell.
A place in an advertizing agency for me is in the back of a typewriter making up slogans.
That's telling mister Honeywell.
Come on, let's get dressed baby. New Year's Eves, Manhattan. You wear the off the shoulder.
You wear something for me too? What the string bow tie?
You kidding?
I wanna show you. Ah, you kidding to all of New York. The man in this string bow tie is mom.
No listen, baby, I get The.
Woman behind the man who quickens the pulses is me. You just run along something of that bow Tigers.
I don't even know how to tie it, mister Honeywell, tied it for me.
Anything, honeywell can do for you? I can do, mister.
Honeywell they do you really want me to?
Please?
Baby? You don't have to say please to me.
Erson, Just go get the bow tie.
Yeah, there's the stat Come on.
Oh, I don't know why supposed to go out.
On New Year's Eve. Everything is so wonderful, even a crowded subway.
I want to tell you something. But here we are twelve feet.
On the ground.
Figures, there's two of us.
No, I mean here we are you and I rushing around.
In a subway and a crowd.
Of people not crowded down the other end of the car.
Gerson, Why did you have to pick a seat right under your pickles?
Let me finish with you.
Sorry, crowd of people and I feel like we're alone, Laurie, hurtling through space alone me?
Please? Could I just squeeze in here? Foot?
Well here, I'll get up.
Oh no, you don't, you just sit there. I squeezed in between you. You mind scooching over a little, madam.
There we are.
I'm over here, Laurie.
Mister yeah, you're skirts though, aren't you? When you got on I told my girlfriend Janis there's skirts of the man in the string boat tied. And Janni said to me, she said, every time you get on the subway's touch dreaming?
Really, Jennis, it's him, wave to.
Jenny's Yes, all right, Hi Janice, young.
Lady, listen, madam, you've had him since twenty third Street.
Don't be ahog. I'm going to feel silly saying it, but I'm going to say it. This man is mine ha haha. Put your money where your mouth is, Madam. Ask him, hey, skeats him? Are you hurt?
She's my wife?
Well if she is your wife, pray.
Tell who are those four girls on the advertisement who are scattered beneath your piano?
Well they're models, that's all, just girls.
So that's all. Are you honest, young lady? Yes, madam, beat it blow Go tell Janice. She wants you. Look Madam.
You might be married to him and all, but I'd like to explain the facts of life to you. The minute he got up in that advertisement, he belonged to humanity, female type.
Can I fix your bot tye skets h Yes ahead.
Yes, where we get off, GIRs. The lady just want to belong to humanity. Gerson and they're waiting for you up there.
Let's hurry before the door slams in your face. Gersey mm hmm, you do a stunning wolf.
Four or four is my favorite temple.
I'm having a lovely time too, oh, just dancing like this beautiful cafe champagne.
You feel a champagne?
Me too?
Me too.
Let's go back to the table and have some more champagne.
I love that song.
What song song?
The orchestra is just playing Tennessee wolves.
Let it be our song. Here's our table. What are you singing? I song that's not the Tennessee walls. Baby. Our song goes like this.
Oh oh, oh, oh, oh Mychael.
Pardon me, friend, yes, what is it? You're the boy that posed for that pity few man.
Give you a shirt?
No, wait, don't bother with the pencil, friend, Just the question, are you am? I what the buster who sits at the piano? See? I only asked because you weren't a bow tie like him. You got a face like him. The only difference is you only got one dame and no piano.
Come here, I'll tell you, yeah, I happened.
To be that chap.
Well, I'll tell you what chap I happen to be. Just put your hand in my pocket and feel that's right now. Now I'll take your hand out. What did you feel?
A Smith Wesson thirty eight snob No Series nineteen twenty seven. Hey, Laurie, you know what was in his pocket? A Smith West.
Let's leave, I said, sit down, you're him? How must do?
Sure?
That's all I want to know.
I'll put you you talk to me like that again, and I'll scream.
Well before you do, lady, I want to tell you something. You you know the Hudson Tunnel.
Sure, we take from them all the time, and we go to Jersey.
Yeah, Well, you know that concrete pedestal that the policeman stands on. It's just before you hit the jery Zy sign.
Know it very well? You remember, Laura.
It's my favorite mine too.
That particular concrete pedestal is composed of five ingredients, sand cement, and three of my favorite boys. Just because they wouldn't pay any attention to me. So would you please?
Would you pay attention to me? We're all ears.
Up both to you.
Now, let's go celebrate New Year's Eve, shall we?
My way, you're listening to Kathy and Elliott Lewis on stage tonight's play The String bow.
Tie Laurie, Yes, dear, is he still laving?
Yes, dear?
Keep walking?
Come on, look look mister, why are you doing this to us? You want our money?
What sheep walking?
But who are you? Why are you picking on us?
Nineteen fifty three is going to be a nice yeah, so do yourselves a favor. Live through it, all right, I'm back.
All of us.
Come on, let's go, all right, Thomas take us home.
Mister, Yeah, it's on account of this string bow tie.
Huh, it's not a kind of that, hey, buster me. Yeah, how come that when you stuck your hand in my pocket? You knew right away without looking at the gun was a Smitt and Wesson ninety eighth Snubnose series nineteen twenty seven.
By work in an advertising agency. I wrote a slogan for it for Catalog. Oh yeah, how to go use a Smith Wesson and be sure?
Oh you know, you just happened to be the fellow who made me switch from a cold forty five.
I hate to louse up your testimonial, but I'd like to point a few things.
Out to you.
You're a titler.
This is a very serious offense.
Kidnapping us out of a nightclub, taking us to a place or place is unknown, and for such a flimsy reason because my husband is on a subway card.
I hate him? Me?
What did I ever do to you?
You'll see, look, sir, I just happen to be a fellow named Gerson.
HAPs that just happened to be a fellow named William Bailey who hates you.
Where are you taking us? You'll see, Gerson? What say something?
Make mister Bailey realize that he's not dealing with a cardboard personality. Make him know what's in store for him if he doesn't let us off right away.
Yeah, make me do that.
Go on, mister Bailey.
Yeah, this is madness, that's all you're gonna say.
Gerson, Gerson, you're my man?
Yeah yeah, mister Bailey.
Yeah.
You don't think you're gonna get away with this, do you? What's the big idea of holding a gun on us and marching us out of a nightclub, making us walk down the street, making us get into a long black car and driving us away?
What's the big idea that? Huh?
This is civilization we got going for us here, Fellow there's no place in it for the primitive, the predatory emotion. You say you hate me, I don't hate you. My wife doesn't hate you, although the seed is there.
You think the world's against you, don't you.
Well, somewhere down the line, you've been tricked, mister Bailey, bill disillusioned. Oh now, lord, just because I paused for an ad. Hey, I know what. I'll take off the string bow.
Tie and hunch that tie and I will break your arm here, here and here.
Listen you, you hulum, renegade, matter factor.
You listen to me, You houtlum. You leave my husband alone. It isn't his fault. He's wearing that string bow tie. I made him put it on. Anything that's going to happen should happen to me, not him.
Maybe maybe what a dame in a Hudson tunnel? Hmmm, dame, that'll pose quite a problem for a concrete mixer. Wonder if he knows the recipe? Just flow people come on inside?
Oh my, uh huh?
You like it? Eh?
Oh well, you must be the greatest Hutlam of them all to be able to afford this, mister Bailey.
Na in such beautiful tastes, such excusistic. You ought to be proud of this place.
Yes I am, I am, and I can tell you this, lady, there is never going to be another place like it.
Uh the decorator, Yeah, Hudson song, the one in the middle. Y.
Uh, Carolyn, it's me, it's me. Come on out here. I got something for you.
Oh, Billy, you brought him? Hi me, You're cute him. He's cute, Carolyn, He's cute.
You like him?
Man, tell him to walk around?
Walk? Walk?
What do you mean?
Listen you, My wife wants you to walk, So do it.
I don't understand.
Stick his head right in the light socket. So I'll help me out.
Wait wait, wait, wait, wait a minute, I'll explain it to him.
Gerson. Honey, the man's got it done. He's pointing at it. You. He wants you to walk.
You know how that bit goes first this foot and then that foot, and then before you know.
Okay, okay, yeah, all right, that's enough, come back.
Well cute.
You know why I brought him here, Carolyn.
Because you love me, Billy, Billy loves me.
I brought him here so that you can see in a flash, this guy that you have been moping over since you saw that advertisement in the subway.
Billy's good to me. What's your thank you?
Gerson?
You see, Billy, I told you you guessed his name was Gerson. He's cute.
Shee, Carolyn, Carolyn, I'm talking to you.
Yeah.
I want proof to you, Carolyn, that this Geyson who sits in front of a piano on the skiteo cologne ed, he is a Geyson like any other Geyson. He's just a guy. See, he is not somebody who every morning, noon and night you say to me, why you ain't you like him?
Billy?
Well look at him, you ain't.
M I can see that the only way to have peace and quiet around here is to do what we come here to do. So get the bottle, Carolyn. You ever seen a bottle of this stuff, Gyson?
Poor?
Yeah, sure, that's Scarzo, the men's cologne that me and my bow tie and the piano is supposed to quicken pusses with.
It's the large economy.
Have some now, look, mister Bailey, Gerson just dabs that stuff behind his ears.
He doesn't drink it.
All right, mister you got us up here and throw a bottle of cologne in my face?
Now what do you want me to do?
See that piano?
Sure?
Play?
Sure, then we can go.
He can't play, she can and can't even play, so goodbye.
Who says I can't play?
Hey play?
Sure? But that's good, that's fine, great. I'm glad that you can so we can clear this up. Listen, Grayson, you got the bow tie. You stink of skite, so and now you're going to play. There is just one thing. You'll quicken my wife's pulse and you are dead. So go play.
Oh my, you like this, go go?
Please Note the vein of my wife's throat. There is a tribe there that wasn't there before. It's been seventeen years since I have seen that tribe.
Why no, no, just take it easy, mister Bailey Greeny Carolyn, Carolyn, He is good, isn't he?
Kron good?
Look at him?
The way he sits there, The way he sits there, fingers poised over. Who knows what strange melody? Strange melody the talents that Gerson has tell me, tell me all sorts of thing.
Tell your husband to tlin around, because I hate to give it the folks in the back.
Just one second more.
Mister Billy, Carolyn honey, Yeah, he does all sorts of things. You think his piano playing is good?
I do? I do you want to hear him whistle? Oh?
My, guy said, yes, ma'am, whistle whistle?
What?
I don't know anything? Our song? Gerson?
Oh? Yes, well all right, Oh my.
You like that?
The Tennessee wats is my favorite? That does it? You can have him?
Huh?
Don't you see? He's not for me anymore? Those two made for each other. Listen to me, mister bailey Ville. Why should I try to fight it?
Or you?
Why don't I just kill him?
That's a good idea, don't you see?
It's the only way get him out of our lives once and for all. This this man, this monster, this wrecker of home.
Laurie, be quiet, you wrecker of home? I said, be quiet?
What kind of a way is that for a lady to talk to her husband?
Yeah?
This man gets his face displayed in the subway. And what happens after eight years? He's not mine anymore. He belongs to the world. Who needs it?
Hey, lady, that is your husband?
Yeah, killed and after eighteen years your life what is it?
Shambles? Get rid of.
Him, lady?
Do it not?
Lady, he's your husband.
You'll be doing a good deed bit, and there's.
No way to talk about your husband.
Now.
Look, I'm older than you, and I know you. You hide a fellow when you talk about him like that.
Yeah, poor boy.
Yeah, you're married to him, So be married to him through thick and thin. Yeah, it's the only way we know, Carolyn and I. Yeah, come here and sit by me, Carolyn, now here by my feet?
Where was I through thick and thin?
Yeah, through thick and thin? Yeah, the years comedy, years ago, but it is always a pleasant thing to have by your side. One's helped me.
Dear Billy, move over, honey, I want to sit by his feet too.
As one sails his ship to the great sea of life, knocked about by the storm.
And his stripe, Let me sit down too.
Pardon you, I buy the storm and the strife.
Uh yeah, knocked about by those things. One one has a friend, One reaches calm waters.
Billy, Yeah, I feel so sentimental, me too. Play something for us, Billy on the piano. Oh well, all right, he's been taking lessons for almost a month now. Since you're at the adjacent m h come on, let's steal away.
So you, uh, mister Bailey, Yeah, by now have a happy new year.
Yeah you too. Remember what I told you, lady, I'll remember.
Who he's satisfying.
Very I saved your life.
It almost got me killed, you and your ideas. I didn't want to wear this stringbow tie.
Yes, ring for the elevator.
Dear, Well, come on, Laurie, let's go out into the world and have us a happy new year.
Can you make room for me?
Dearie?
Oh? Sure, say? Don't I know you? Oh?
Of course we talked the other day. I borrowed a pencil from you to do a crossword puzzle.
I know you.
You're the girl who's married to that man in the string bow tie. That's right, And whatever happened to him? What do you mean he's not up there in the ad anymore? Now there's another gent the man standing by a fireplace with those four hounds his feet. Is that man in that ad there in mutton chop whiskers?
Oh zowey, you like him as well as the.
Man in the string bow t Oh better better look at those whiskers, Dear How would you like to run your hands through them?
I have huh he's my husband. Him to you, what did you do with the other one? Get rid of him? New year?
Oh, dearie, let me ask you something about the new one. In the Mutton Chop, Whiskers.
Sow Wee, The String bow Tie, starring Kathy and Elliott Lewis now once again Mister and Missus Lewis.
We'd like to thank our good friends Shell Leonard and Mary Jane Croft, who came down tonight to help us start the new year and our new series by playing mister and Missus Bill.
Bailey, Yes, and Martha Wentworth, the Lady on the Subway, Vivi Janis who helped fix my tie, and Byron Kane who couldn't spell awk. Now next week, Kathy, Well.
Just before we went into rehearsal today we got a copy of next week's play, The Drunken Sailor. It was written for us by a very fine new radio writer, Richard Chandley.
It's a spy story, exciting and well you'll see.
Yeah.
And a week after that, a comedy about a nice girl and the bum written for us by Richard Powell.
Thank you all for listening. A very happy New Year, good.
Night, good night.
The String bow Tie was written by Morton Fine and David Free. The theme for Kathy and Elliott Lewis on Stage.
Was written by Ray Noble.
Music for the program was composed by Fred Steiner and conducted by lud Gluskin. Kathy and Elliott Lewis on Stage is transcribed and directed by mister Lewis. George Wall speaking and remember John lond As yours truly. Johnny Dollair brings you colorful mystery Friday nights on the CBS Radio Network.