Scream-ish • EP405

Steria Lane like Desperate Housewives. Maybe yeah, I don't know, like a nineties uh nineties thriller. It wanted to be scream fear, Yeah, yeah, fear, scream. What was the one with Alicia Silverstone cruel something? No? Yeah? What was that one with Carrie always an Alicia Silverstone? Yeah? Cross oh crush yeah yeah. This was the psychoderic episode guys alright, Season four, Pisode five, I Love you, but I've chosen Darkness. Air date October thousand six, Hillary, would you like to

do that? Yeah? Well, look it had a real Halloween vibe to it. For October, Lucas and Peyton discovered that Derek's interest in Peyton is more than brotherly, and Derek's behavior takes a dark turn. That's an understatement. Haley reveals that she's pregnant to Nathan at the same time he's offered a scholarship to Duke, and Rachel uses the Internet to set Brooke up on a blind date with an

older guy. I mean, three very different trajectories in this episode for the three ladies of one dreal like, like, what does our show want to be right now? I don't know. The Haleys like it was those two things really probably shouldn't have been in the same episode. The Haley and Nathan like emotional pregnancy journey, his dream and it was like those are that was one of those feel good storylines that we love about our show. And

then this random, psychotic, vile, lent storyline. I feel like maybe they could have done a little better, you know, parceling those out into different different episodes, because even the music choices, it would be like don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, sideways, camera angles, like really loving stuff when Nathan looks in the camera and just like, yo, baby, I love you so much. You know there's tears. You would need babies too much, too much. Wow, it was very all over

the place. It starts on our sex worker, UM, played by a friend of ours, Carrie Moscow. She was my stand in for a big run of the show, UM, and she was an actor as well, And UM, I like that she got some screen time. Yeah, you know, I thought she did a really good job with what she had to do, because it was sad that she couldn't say I've been assaulted, you know, she had to pretend like I'm just clumsy. Really, I felt for her character in that very you know, short scene. She'd been

burned too, and I did too. It was it was nice to see her on camera. I remember, Uh, she was such a lovely person to be around. You know,

our standings, UM. I don't know if we've explained this on the show before, but for those of you who don't know anything about how things are, films are made, UM, when actors, after we rehearse, we go get our hair and makeup on and our wardrobe and everything, and then all the lighting guys are setting up lights and setting up the cameras and they need bodies to stand in our place so that they can light us properly. So UM, that's what Carrie was one of the lovely gals that

we had who would do that for us. And she was a very she's very vivacious, like lovely, sweet smart. I loved seeing her, so it was really that was one of the fun parts about getting I think for a lot of standings, you get on a show and then the crew and everybody gets really comfortable with you, and then when a part like this comes up, you're the first person they think of because you're there every day.

You're already around everyone. Um so, and I think we did that quite a bit on our show with So if your standing was in this episode two Actley, yeah, yeah, I was just gonna say, that's part of what's so cool, especially when you do a show for a long time, is you really get to form a bond with these folks. And you know, by now we're in season four. So when we started working, you know, we we were all

so young. It was pretty common that you'd have someone who was your standing, who had been doing it awhile, who maybe was your age, who maybe was a little older than you. And then a lot of those people go and they get the jobs they've been training for and and you get this sort of new crop of people, and I think, you know, we had we had like what was it, probably like three regular folks for each of us over the course of nine years. Like those

are really close relationships. And you know, even I did four years of a show UM in Chicago, and I had the same standing for almost the entire time, in the same stunt double for the entire show. And it's like these people become your families. And like Kelly who doubled me UM who helped do all the stunt choreography in Chicago, had actually doubled me on a movie that I filmed while we were doing One Tree Hill and

has gone on to continue working with me. And it's like it's such a It is interesting because people don't see those people on camera a lot, but they are like truly some of our closest friends in our working world.

And it was always so neat when to your point apart, like this would come up and then they'd be given the opportunity to audition, and it was just always really special when they would win a part like that because they were on set day and day out, studying and learning the craft and you know, trying to Um pursue those goals while helping us pursue ours. It's like it's

a very very special thing. Yeah. Um. Also, which I've always think it's funny because they try to find stand ins that have um features that are similar to yours, Like Ashley has it has an upturned I don't know if that's the right phrase, but like a very defined nose and so do you, and you're like a similar

bone structure like her cheek bones. There's this like even though you guys don't look like if you pass each other on the street and the same thing, bridget my my stand in big brown eyes, kind of a round face and like you know, put puffy cheeks. Hillary you um carry had um and they have to find somebody who's your height too. But the hair color. Her eyes

were blue and yours are green. But it's the same kind of a thing, eyes, big light eyes, Yeah, a similar kind of skin tone and bone structure, shoulders, shoulders are a big thing, that's right, That's right. So it's funny to see somebody come in and you're like, oh, you're the other me. This is so weird. Yeah, especially to have Carrie dressed up as you. Okay, it really did create this chilling effect because you could see as an audience member what Derek saw in her, and it's

because that's what our whole crews on her. Yeah, I just found I'm doing a documentary for something else, and I had to go through and look at all of our pictures from this era, and I just found, like, literally right before we started watching this episode, all the pictures from this episode, because hair and makeup took a bunch of behind the scenes photos, and there are pictures of me with my stunt double in our cheerleading uniforms, and so we'll post those. Well, I'm gonna post those.

I'm gonna go get those out. You know. What else say is that we talked at length in our last podcast about how um complicated this episode was because they were really trying to appeal to a male audience that liked female brutality, and so I don't want to continue

to beat that dead ho. What I will say is our hair and makeup team knew how uncomfortable I was, and they made that day of shooting in the bedroom with Derek and all the crazy so fun, and they like, they made it like such a joke, Like any time I was just like seated on the floor because Peyton's getting dragged and it's in between takes. They would they would yell out, like nobody puts baby in a corner, you know, just for being so freaking goofy about it. Um,

And that's man, that's the power of chicks. Chicks just know when you're uncomfortable, and they're like, we're gonna come in and at least we're going to make it funny behind the scenes. So yeah, we had a good Yeah. Well, how was Matt in that? I mean that had to have been hard for him to you know, I think any any guy who's not a second path, you know, feels uncomfortable being put in that position, having to act

out and stuff like that. With all of our boy start having to do like like this new Nick guy has to be a total creeper that's so creepy that whole Derek has to be creepy, and Nathan has to be like kind of complicated with the I'm not gonna feel guilty about this of it all. Um. Yeah, doing hard stuff is where you're acting shows up. I suppose Matt Barr, But did you guys have conversations with he like you know, is this okay? What can I like? How?

How did that go? That? Dude was so concerned about my comfort level, Like the whole the whole time he was on the show, you know, it was always like, is this too much? Is what works for you? How can I dial this back? How do I you know, I have to make your terror makes sense? So do you need me to turn it up to eleven? Like? He just checked in constantly. And he was younger than

us too. You know, I don't know what Matt had worked on before he came on One Tree Hill, but it's not like he'd been doing a ton of movies where he was the old, you know, seasoned pro. He just knew to be thoughtful about it, um, and especially like you know, there's he throws me on the head, butts me onto the bed and then has to climb

on top of me. That got me. I have kissed every boy on this show, and I will say that like Matt Barr having to do as much physical interaction as we did, hands down the most thoughtful with like where do I put my hands? Where can I put my leg? You know, are you okay lining this up ourselves?

Or do you want someone else to do it. Um. I can't say enough good stuff about that guy, because he's great and and what I appreciate about Matt is that you see it, especially in the scene where Peyton goes to his hotel room, which like, what why why why did she go there? We all screamed because of the wise she had to check the keyboard sticky, Why man sticky? Why? Uh? But showing the instability in that humans psyche Uh, Matt did a really good job because

you can tell that Derek is on rattling. I mean, and like, not in a I want to sleep with you kind of way necessarily, but in a I need to consume you. I need like your validation is the

only thing keeping me breathing. Yeah, it's a it's a kind of possessiveness that is so clearly off the rails, and it's really it's really fascinating to watch someone who's good like Matt is good, he's an actor handle it, and it's relieving to know how kind he was in your one on ones behind the scenes that were so upsetting,

because it's really hard to film material like that. It does leave a residue on your body, and how much of it you can arry can really be mitigated by the tenor of the environment when the cameras aren't rolling, and you deserve to if you have to portray scenes like this or or do material like this, like what a gift to at least have someone try to take care of you through it. That's a that's a good scene partner. And I think you know to your point.

We've talked about the things that make us really uncomfortable about some of these storylines, and whether it's this kind of really extreme um male obsessive violence and possessiveness, or it's you know, a teacher telling his date that he fantasizes about high school cheerleaders. It so gross that this whole storyline. Oh, we don't like where this is going for you. I can't wait to read you guys the tweet I got about just today because people know this

episode is coming off. Um. But I will say that the way that the set is run between the takes can make all the difference when you know when the

material is not emotionally ideal. Well, even like Matt went so far out of his way to like be bros with Chad and Ernest Waddell, who plays real Derek as well, like he wanted them to feel comfortable and there's kind of this weird alpha male energy anytime there's action scenes were like you stay away from each other in between takes, and like you go to push ups in a corner so you look ripped and like that. And Matt was

just like, does anybody want coffee? I'm going by craft service, Gonna get you guys anything, you know, And it was, yeah, the camaraderie with all of us because we all end up rolling around together on the floor in that bedroom, hitting each other with lamps and uh, it was just part of time that you kind of have to when you're when you're playing a role like that, you've got

to make sure everybody knows you're act really nice guy. Well, yeah, look, there's a lot of actors out there who are so method that they'll show up and be broody and just stay in that zone and it's like, oh, it's scary to be around. And you know, I just I love it when people are able to just be Who was it, Laurence Olivier That was like it's called acting, Yeah, said I think I think Dustin Hoffman on a movie and was just like, oh, kid, please its acting directing yourself.

So seriously, yeah, okay, well let's get let's go in a little bit of order here. Because Haley and Nathan had a huge storyline, that's a big episode. We kept this you know, suspense going since last season where we don't know who's pregnant. I know, Okay, well let's talk about it. Um. Apparently I discovered self tanner highlights and eyelash strips because but then also somehow I discovered like, what are they board shorts? I literally don't even know

what those kind of shorts are called. They go to your knees and short. The era where I would be in a long sleeve T shirt bermuda shorts and platform flip flops is uh yeah, it's not to be desired. This was a costume designer that I didn't get along with. Well he wasn't here for very long. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember. He was really combative. He put out three outfits for you and you'd be like, oh, I really

love this one. This one's actually my least favorite. So if we can make sure that like this isn't the one, and then sure ship you choke up in your trailer in the morning, and it would be the one you hated. You were just like, God, this guy whatever. Though shorts were cute and I like that. Haley was like, look, if I'm gonna be pregnant, I'm hot pregnant, like none of this sweaty, like I don't feel good ship so cute. So so yeah. I mean, I remember when we filmed

that scene. I thought it was really strange. I was having a hard time figuring out how to deliver that line because it was so unnatural to me for Nathan to say I'm going to duke, and for Haley, who's been holding onto this secret the whole time, to spit out I'm pregnant. Um, it just seemed really out of character, like she, if she's held on to it this long, she would let him really enjoy that and everything and then maybe break it to him in like a couple

of days. And I don't know. So that was weird, but we figured it out. It still felt clunky to me when I watched it back. Um, but then why is Nathan so I don't know, it seems so strange. Did did did all that his behavior check out? For you guys, because to me, it seems so weird. Well, here's what I'll say is none of us had had babies, none of us had been pregnant when this was filmed, and so it's like, what do those hormones due to your brain, you know, in your first trimester? And now

I know I was a nightmare. I mean like legit nut case. And the idea that Haley's like saying things out of character, yeah that tracks. Yeah, okay, you know her sensitivity to stuff makes sense. M hmmmm. But I will also say Nathan tracked for me because of the prior episodes, Like, if he had just talked to you in that way, I think I would have been like, what the funk man? But because he has thought Brooke is pregnant, and he's been like, I can't believe she

wouldn't tell him. How has she kept this from him? He's gotten really vulnerable about how he feels about secrets and what feels like a betrayal of trust and confidence and and I do think look, at the end of the day, priority number one is the pregnant person, like Hayley needs to the process she's having the feelings she's having, but he's also having an experience. Yeah, like you can't

he can't be expected to be that rational. No, And I and I think I think because of the episodes and episodes we've done of the fake out him being like I have literally I mean, you know, he doesn't say this, but the way I what I what I feel like I saw in the performance was I have been looking at you for weeks talking about Brooke being pregnant and it's you, and you didn't tell me like,

oh good. So what I what I actually really liked about it was that was that there was such a miss and so much discomfort and and for once, like they push poor Paul into just being such a lunatic of the time is Dan. I actually thought the Dan Scott stuff really worked in this episode. It wasn't like super Villain. It was much smaller, it was smarter, it was better played manipulation. And I think that's Paul because he knew there was so much psycho in this episode.

He was like, they don't need Dan over the top either. Yeah. He brought it down to the ground and very very real and it was so good. And the crazy thing is, you know, and for our friends at home when we watched the episode, when Dan says, you know, Hayley's already had her dream. Now it's your turn. The three of us were like, oh my god, do we agree with Dan Scott right now? He's not wrong and so he's

not wrong. So it's this really interesting moment where I think, what I like about it is that I can see why everybody's upset, and I don't think anybody's actually wrong. Yeah, those are some of the most interesting interactions. I think when you when you're whether it's in your in personal life, it's harder to appreciate the the intrigue of the dynamic when it's your own personal feelings and relationship. But watching um,

someone else go through it. That's why I said when Nathan walked out the door, It's like, what an interesting It's so interesting that all these people are feeling their own feelings and that's their reality, and that's exactly what they feel, and none of them are really wrong, but

they're all missing each other. I as like, as a teen boy mom, I'm really interested in the walking way of it all because throughout my child's childhood and adolescence, I have told him, if you're in a situation where you feel your emotions are getting hot, right, take a beat, and if you and if you're still hot, go for it.

But if you're not still hot, then you've taken a beat, right, And so I've gotten calls from Gus to school where they're like, hey, Gus is just like left the classroom or like he's just like let oh yeah, They're like, he's left, he's walked away from a situation and we can't get him to talk to us. And I'm like, because it doesn't need to talk to you, but I've raised him to walk away. And so like what I thought, what Nathan did was right, because that's how I've raised

my child. Like you know, before you get into it, yeah, take your beat, and if you still feel the same way, honor it. But if you don't, good thing you took that beat, Yeah, give yourself a moment to really assess and let your adrenaline come down, because then you might avoid saying something you regret and it'll be better for everybody. Because we've seen Nathan say some like nasty stuff. We've

seen Nathan do some really stuff. And so rather than do anything nasty, he was like, I'm going to go to Rachel's house and sit on her bed to go to somewhere totally random and reject her. Still and still, Yes, I heard something yesterday was having drinks with a girlfriend. She said, you can't solve a problem on the same frequency that it was created. Um. It's a quote from someone I can't remember who. If anybody out there finds it,

I'd love to know who said that. Um. But I think it's so true that you can't wherever the problem is created. You have to come at it from a different angle. And when you're uh, when you're hot and you're meeting it on the same emotional level, you there's no good that's going to come from that. It's always going to be just two problems back and forth, batting at each other. You know, it's Einstein Joy, Oh that guy. We can't solve problems by using the same kind of

thinking we used when we created them. I like the frequency at it that. I like how it's evolved. Here's a here's a random, totally total non seguitar um. My grandmother used to catch butterflies on the beach with Obertin. She dated Einstein, dated Einstein, No, she would she was a little girl and she would catch butterflies on the beach with him. When she was a little girl and he was out there and he was like, isn't that

so funny? Um? Anyway, but can we'll tell people that your grandma dated Einstein because that is just like a I think the age difference. If somebody really like, I know, it'll be like Nick in this episode. Yeah, it's like Pocohonas and John Smith. We're like, teachers should not be hitting on their students, and then we're like, what a hundred years ago it might have been cute. I think she was like six and he was like twenty, and it was like, little girl, you come catch butterflies with

me on the beach. Um anyway, Sorry coming back to it, but yes, that's that's a lesson that has been very difficult for me to learn in life, and I'm I still work on it. Is when I feel that emotional reaction come up, I feel so strongly about it that like if I don't do it, if I don't say something, something must be done. I must do something and always always get backfires. And I just have to learn have to keep reminding myself to do exactly what you're teaching

your son, which is so great. Hillary, just walk away, come back later. My cycle is say it calm, say it calm, Say it calm, say it calm. And then when I hit that bain, I've said it calm five times and I have to explode. You've earned that. And I think, and I think Nathan is doing that. He's like, I'm gonna say it calm. I'm gonna say it calm. I'm gonna say it calm. And if everyone keeps pushing my buttons, I might explode because we've all seen me

do that before. Um. But but the tempered reactions are difficult for kids. You know, Hayley's dealing with she's dealing with pregnancy hormones, but Nathan's dealing with teen boy hormones and kids who have been raised with parents that clearly don't spend time teaching them anything. Yeah, yeah, Ferrell, Yeah yeah, it's like the most The most eternal person in this episode, the most parental person in this episode is Karen when she welcomes Haley in and says, welcome to my life.

You know I was given you guys more of like a scene I think they did. I think we remember this was at that point where at least two scenes wound up on the cutting room floor every episode because they would overwrite and then we would lose things, and it was so sad. I feel like it would have

been so nice to see you. But what I will say is it made sense, Like even just that sentence was so impactful, and this idea that an adult could look at you and say, I've been there, I'm here Haley going to Dan though, that really threw me off. It threw me off on the day too, and when I got the script, I was like, this is so unrealized at about you and Paul are such good friends? Now?

Were you guys that tight then? Like was this kind of a behind the scenes showing up on camera thing or was this the start of you guys hanging out more, because yeah, we were tight. We were tight kind of right right away. We became good friends, and I think once I got married in real life, that relationship cooled because I don't know, it was just like I was young and it felt weird to be like super close friends with somewhat like I mean, I got along better

with him than I did with my husband's. Probably I should be respectful and not like spend all my time exactly, you know, trying to be a good wife. Um. But anyway, Uh yeah, so we did get on really well and it was always easy on set. So I think that was probably a little bit of just normal Paul enjoy communication just bleeding into that scene. But it just was I just could not really believe that Hayley would go to Dan first, maybe Karen, maybe Deb maybe her own

mom like my own mom, and dad. Uh Lucas he just seems like the last person that she would go to a to confide in, be to give information to, uh, and then see to receive advice from. All three of those things are just very I just I don't I don't believe it. I don't buy it. I mean, I guess the line of thinking is of Nathan was following Dan's trajectory. The only other person on the planet that could know what Nathan's thinking is the other guy that

you know had a dream. I dreamed a dream. Um yeah, so maybe maybe in that case then I wish I had played it differently. And um, who knows. Maybe I was feeling stubborn on that day and I just was like, no, I really want to sit down and be sincere, and um, maybe I should have done it more like from the door and been like hesitant and I wish I wasn't here. There's no reason for me to be here, but I have to do this and you need to know, and you know, could have kept it a little bit more that.

But then again there's the hormones as a pregnancy hormones, so that kind of writes everything. You can have free pass free hall pass on pregnancy hormones for like everything, you set Dan up for tenderness, which is because if we look at all of Dan's lines in that episode or in that scene, he's got that line where you're like, I'm pregnant and he says that seems to be going around and he says in a really loving way, but he could have said it really Assi if he wanted to.

You know, like, you set him up for tender choices. Yeah, well it's interesting to see Dan like processing all this and the way that he approached Nathan on the basketball court afterward, which yeah, also again could have been done and delivered in a way that was very mustache twisty villain and instead it was very real, solid advice, I mean loving advice. Yeah, he was right, he was, I know, what does Haley want to study? That she can only

go to Stanford. That's what I was thinking, Like, what's the big deal, Yeah, she could very easily go to Duke. But I think, look, I think part of it is about what our dreams are. And it's what Dan says to Nathan. You've loved Haley for a year, You've loved basketball your whole life. We we have these dreams, these things that were obsessed with as young people, and then your plans change and you realize, oh, this is still great.

But when you're so young and your your plans haven't had much cause to change, I think the idea of you know, the pennant you've had on your wall since you were little is probably really really meaningful to you, even though at this at this stage in life, you know, now we're all the age that Dan Scott was and we look back and go, it doesn't no matter where you go to college, how dub But at seventeen, it's

like it's everything. Have you ever dated someone that was like I need you to give up the super huge opportunity, like you're going to pick me over this big opportunity? Yes? And did those work out? No? Not? The relationship and then the missed opportunity. Yeah, you know, it's like I think, so there's a distinction that feels important between what Nathan says, which is, this is a decision will make as a family, this we will choose our path based on what's good

for the three of us. There's that, and then there is the thing that I see us all smirking about, which is being young and especially being young women who are succeeding and being in relationships with men whose masculinity is very threatened by female success, who then look at you. We've had someone or someone's look at each of us and say you need to be a little smaller so I can be big. And that is like, that's just like pouring napalm on the whole neighborhood. It's like goodbye,

light it up, like we're done, We're done here. That is when someone just wants you to be small so they can feel big. It's very different than being in a healthy partnership, where where as a team you say, okay, we have to figure out what's doable for us. It's hard to tell though, when especially when you're young. I mean yeah, even at our age, it can sometimes be

hard to tell. But you know, we have the advantage of life experience, because when you're that young, it's like, oh, well, I don't want to you know, you should be able to have space for you and so yeah, I don't want to take up all the space. Like let's you you think that you're actually maybe doing something so much? Yeah, yeah, yeah, and no, like okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna make sacrifice. That's what a relationship is about. You have to make sacrifices for each other, and you do so it's like

there's always this element of truth. Yes, in relationships, you need to make sacrifices for each other, but it's within the context of making decisions together, rather than someone saying I I can't handle your essence, like everything about you, your dreams, your your fullness. I can't handle that. You

have to be smaller. Yeah. What I think is really interesting is learning learning that it's a sliding scale, Like there there is a window of healthy compromise and willingness to listen, but there's a lot on either side of that scale. And I think when you're younger, it can be easier to martyr yourself or shrink yourself or dim your own light and say well of course I can do this for you, and yes, I can prove to you that I love you so much because I'm willing

to miss out on fill in the blank. And it is to your point, Joy that life experience you get as you get older, where it's much easier to know the difference between someone who's insecure. Yes, and and you know they say, for example, marriage or relationships their work, and all of us are at the stage where we go, Yeah,

their work, but they shouldn't be torture. And when you're young, when you're younger, sometimes you think that the suffering, like this must be the work that everybody says it takes, and you're just you're in the wrong scale. It's a hard no on the suffering and the torture for me by the work is more like who's picking up Thai food tonight? You know, like which one of us is going to take that turn? Um, Joy, you made a comment during the press conference. You're like, why is it

Hailey there? Like, yeah, in hindsight, what do you think Hayley should have done? Given that, Like Nathan, this child clearly has PTSD. His mom's got off the rails. This child has not had a win in a long time, like as his partner, what would you have done? Absolutely would have shown up me now like my age. Now you just put the problem on the shelf and know you're gonna coming back to it, and you show up with bells on. But you know she's again like six

seventeen eighteen. I don't know. I guess she was feeling sorry for herself. They had a big fight, and that's something that happens a lot in relationships, when you have a fight and then you think, oh, he doesn't want me there. He actually basically told me stay home, like, don't be a part of this. Even though those words weren't said, you interpret those feelings and um, you know, people misunderstand each other all the time and then feel

like then again they're just missing each other. Yeah, I do wish. I don't know. Do you think she should have stayed home? Did you? Did you like that when he came home? Like the Haley I think of would have had a cake that said like the baby and I are proud of you. You know, I would have done something to be creative and make it like fun and so to see her just so like I don't know, Yeah,

she was kind of MOPy. Yeah. But in the same way that I can understand Nathan's reaction, I can also understand that for Haley, because yes, she's been keeping this secret for I don't know, six weeks or whatever. But that is six weeks of waiting for the reaction that you're hoping is coming, and then you don't get it. And yeah, it's your fault because you're the one who kept the secret, but it doesn't matter. It's like, that's six weeks of a build up and you're a little heartbroken.

And and I think that's why I enjoyed these scenes with the two of you so much, because I felt for you both so clearly. I understood exactly where each of you was coming from. And Haley had to go lick her wounds, regardless of the fact that they're kind of self inflicted. It doesn't matter. Like he he really didn't give her the thing she'd been hoping for, and he was justified and not being excited because he felt betrayed and and oh god, it's like such an uncomfortable

stand still. Yeah, totally, you know. I wish that scene would have gone. I'm rewriting this scene. Okay, Okay. My favorite things that we do. Yeah, pretend it happened this way. So, okay, Nathan's where did he do? You got a phone call or you got an email? It was like a phone call. Okay, So Nathan's from Coach K. And then meanwhile we cut to Haley Coach K. Haley's in the bathroom and she's like psiking herself up to tell him, and she's like getting ready to tell him, and then he's on the phone,

he's got his call. And then she's like, okay, I'm gonna go do it, and maybe she's on her phone. She's like, I'm gonna tell him now, okay, and then they both walk out in the hallway and they're like, I have something to tell you, and it's like, okay, let's let's both say it at the same time. They're both really excited and they say at the exact same time, and then they both just like, Oh, that's so much better that would have been from now on. That's how

I remember that scene happening. Yeah, I'm like Hayley being in the bathroom on the phone with Brook being like, I'm going to do it today and she's like, you better do it today, Hayley. Today, you tell everybody today. Like I remember when Jeffrey and I found out that we were pregnant with Gus, Like we were like, oh

oh man, wow, there's a lot of wow. And then and then we walked like eight miles like we were in Manhattan, and we just walked all the way from downtown all the way to uptown and didn't really talk, but it was just every once in a while we just like stop at a at a light and be like wow, wow, Like that's the reaction that I see these kids having because it's like I don't even have the language take this. Wow. Yeah, it's amazing. Yeah, sometimes you just got to let the silence take over, but

instead you know. But but what I love about your idea to joy is that it would have tracked some of the humor, yes, of the last couple of episodes, because by the way, some of the great humor is for Haley and Brooke and their secrets. Yes, and and now I finally know where the gift of me going thank you comes from. I was like, oh my god, it's that cake. Should have come in. Brook should have made a cake. They should have she should have been at her apartment finishing it up. Like she's got the

cake covered. Haley pulls the lid off the thing and it's the cake that's like, and Brooke is the cake just says it isn't me. Congratulations Brook. But it's like if if if your scene had happened where you'd been on the phone with me and he'd been on the phone with the coach and then we've gotten to school, and I was like, I get that it didn't go the way you wanted it to go, but I don't really care. People need to know, like it would have tracked the hilarity that you and I had had in

all of those scenes throughout these first four episodes. I loved that jump on the table, just taking it. She was like, yeah, alright, I'll just like, yeah, I've done it. I'm done, I've run out of road. All right, well let's talk about Let's talk about Brook then, because she again manipulating a situation getting broken into some other sticky It's just it started so on such a high note for Broke, Like I laughed when I jumped up on

that table. I forgot about that, Like God, I I loved the physical freedom I had in her comedy to be big and she's like re laiming her power, and then Rachel puts her on a dating app. You're so Italian, talking with your hands, using your arms and talking with your hands on that table, a flailing all the time. You can't help it. Um. But yeah, the the stuff with the Brook and Nick storyline made me so incredibly uncomfortable.

And you know, I know we've talked about a lot of this, and to echo Hillary's point, we're not trying to be the dead horse, but I remember how uncomfortable it made me then before you even shot it, or once you were shooting at all of it, the scenes, shooting the scenes, everything was uncomfortable. And and they the writers really liked to do this thing where they sort of dressed Brooke and Rachel up as these like promiscuity barbies and would send them out pretending to be older

and like seducing guys. And it just really flashed in my brain of the boss that came out like ran Skipper and like Barbie and then just like but now now because it's now, because it's two would be like sex positive Barbie, Yeah, like do you but also, oh god,

I just didn't like it. It made me really uncomfortable and and again, like you know, not having like a ton of experience under my belt as a woman, like a young woman in my twenties, and playing someone on TV who was so sexualized, so I got I got treated like I was like some wild child vixen in my real life because of Brook and it it made me so uncomfortable. Would guys come up to you and talk to you in ways that you thought they never

would if they didn't know your character? Oh? Absolutely. I remember one night in a bar in Wilmington's getting physically assaulted by uh there were a group of Marines who were in from one of the basis, and these two guys put their hands up my short and I like sweating even thinking about it, and I turned around and just like the first one close to me, I smacked him across the face and like shoved the other one

and I just started screaming, no shock. I was immediately on a soapbox about how they didn't deserve to wear a uniform and every freedom they had ever fought for was a fucking lie because they were just creepy and and suddenly they're like sorry, sorry, And they tried to make all these excuses about like watching Brooke Davis on the Armed Forces Network and how I was their crut

crush and I was just like shaking and sweating. And when I turned to my right, there was Scottie Saber and yeah, and for our listeners at home, Saber was like one of our best boyfriends on our show, and uh a guy who worked in a ready department, and he was a wrestler, like a literal, actual wrestler, and he was just standing in they can't put his arms all the way down. He's just like built like a brick house. And he was standing there with his giant like you know, just read in the face and all

the veins were pumping out of his neck. And I looked at him and he was like, I was really impressed watching you and you had it, but just so you know, I was ready to rip their heads off if they had if they had not apologized, and I was like, oh, so yes, Like it's tangential, but like that was the energy I was met with a lot out in the world when our show was on, and it was so uncomfortable, and you know, it would even be like I don't know, I'd go to like a

dinner event and depending on who I got sat next to. It would run in the tabloids. It's like she's dating that and I'm like, I said two words to that person, like a thing. I don't know him. Sometimes they were cute. I was like, can I get his number? And I'm like, I'm like, if you're gonna write the story, at least like somebody take me to dinner. Um, that's when you send the apology to the age. I am so sorry,

but I'm very curious if this is a thing. Um. So it was just like a weird It was a weird time and it was a weird um opinion to be met with, To have people really think that, you know, I was this girl who would like dress up in short skirts and go out and like bang older dudes in bars or like in classrooms. It was just not comfortable. And the actor who they brought into play Nick Um, you know, was polite like it's not even about him.

It was about the the way these scenes were written and what they asked him to do, and like it actually made me feel so who good watching how uncomfortable that scene made the two of you When you were like, wait, this guy's like talking about fantasizing about cheerleaders and he's a teacher on a first blind date and like, bloke doesn't know that he's a teacher, so he feels like he has freedom to ye like, you know, joke about

that kink. But yeah, it was gross and it and it really I think because of what we were all going through behind the scenes, it felt even grosser because we knew that that was verbatim the fantasy of the adult men we worked with. Dude, we do okay in terms of like storylines. We just did the Rachel Cooper thing. Why are we what are we doing this again? We're just lazy constantly doing the high school fantasy with an

older guys story over and over. And that's what was hard, I know, in season, for for me and also for Danielle with the Cooper stuff. You know, thank god, Michael Truco is the nicest man on the planet Earth. But we knew that we were being forced to film re enactments of our bosses fantasies and it just felt gross.

And interestingly enough, somebody tweeted me um one of our Drama Queens fans, and by the way, I love when the boys call out men on their shop Marvebo's Yeah, there's this sweet sweet man on Twitter, Mark Corrigan, who tweeted at us and said, do you guys think they made Brooks eighteenth birthday an on screen occasion to make sure the audience knew she was eighteen before she started sleeping with her teacher. It always felt icky to me and like it was too big of a coincidence. Wow, yeah,

I'm sure, I'm sure it wasn't. I'm sure, you know, because did any of the rest of us have birthdays on the show? I never did it, m I only had the one. I don't remember any other birthdays. And it was a big deal about brook turning eighteen, and we had just had the Rachel storyline where you know, Cooper's what sleeping with a seventeen year old and he says, I Am not going to do this, and she's like, well, seventeen is the age of consent and this state It's like, no,

that's that's like pretty pedophile. And so they keep leaning into We're going to tell you why it's quote Okay, but this whole thing of like do you still have your cheerleading uniform? Like it is so clearly about fantasizing about teenage girls, and so the whole thing. I don't know, man, It just it like washes this feeling of ickiness over me.

And it was hard to deal with that on camera and then be met with it out in the world and feel like I had to be prepared for a fight if like all of us went out to play pool. You know, it was a weird It was a really weird time. Well, I have to I have to leave and go pick up my son, or not pick him up. But Gus, Gus is doing a mock trial of the Salem witch trials at school and oh my gosh, what are you filming it? That's a video of that. It's

gonna be the greatest day of my life. Um, I'm dying. However, Sophia, I totally feel what you're saying, because the entire reason that Peyton had to go to this press conference for Nathan, which makes no sense, was just to have an excuse for her to be in her cheerleading uniform, because getting attacked in your uniform in a little short skirt was hotter than getting attacked in what Peyton was wearing earlier during the day, which was like like this cole narrative

about being at the press conference was manufactured just so that the attacks would happen in Bloomers. Um, and remember that being like a whole conversation like we just have to get you in your uniform, And I was like, huh, um, so I just made sure I was really sweaty and snotty and bloody, like like how gross? Can I make my face? Um? Yeah, So I totally feel what you're saying. But look, here's the upside. We got Ernest Waddell out of this episode we did. I love such a cool artist.

It would be really great to have Earnest on the show. Um. Yeah, we need to get him because I think he's still in New York and he went to n y U with Greenberg. We need to get Earnest, and we need to get Matt Barr because you know, our friends who got to come on tour got to hear from him. But I do think it would be really special to to be able to dissect this with him because he is just such a good human. Let's have him for

the prom episode. Alright. I love Trials. Um. So, actually, when you were talking, I wanted to ask you because there were other teen shows on the air. At the time that we were on and other other girls that were also objectified in the same way, um, their characters being you know, hyper sexualized and stuff. Did you ever talk with any of them? Did you guys ever sort of did you ever run into anybody at a party or end up having a kind of a similar conversation.

I mean, no, that was part of what was so weird. I think for us was just being in Wilmington's. We were so isolated. Yeah, you didn't get a chance to talk with the Gossip Girl girls or the See or any I didn't watch those shows, so I don't know, but I just know that was happening on the air and a lot of teen shows. So maybe no, I mean partially, I think because we were just so rarely at things together, you know. I was like all the summer, Yeah, like the summer after I made John Tucker Must Die,

I did. I did that movie with Penn Badgeley, you know who was on Gossip and God Pen is just the sweetest, sweetest human and at the time, Uh, I don't remember when we made the movie or after. I don't obviously know the dates of their relationship, but you know, him and Blake dated for a long time. They fell in love on that show, and they were a very sweet couple. And you know, like I ran into them at the Teen Choice Awards and it was like, Hi,

how are you and whatever. But you know, you see someone in passing it an award show, it's not like look at the convers at a table you've been drinking. Yeah, you want to have like an experience to bond and and get into something. And I think because we spent nine years so far away, occasionally they would make it work so you could get home to present it the whatever, but then you'd come right back. So we we didn't

have sounding boards aside from each other. And I will say, you know, in this era, Danielle was back and forth because she was recurring, so she would come in for scenes and and go home to l A. And you know, you had just gotten married and you were like busy

having this lovely moment. And so what what was really helpful for me was in my friendships with like you know, Jane Beck and Lee Norris and sweet Scotty Saber and even James, Like we would all go out together and they they were some of the ones who really would

call call out the way I would get approached. And when when you look at like when someone says some of you and you turn your head and you've got Lee, James and Scotty looking at you, going they shouldn't talk to you like that, and you go, oh ship, because I'm I'm in this moment where I'm thinking, you know, these people, yeah, maybe they said something inappropriate, or maybe the exchange was weird, but their fans and my job

is to be nice to them. It was really having the boys begin advocating saying absolutely not where where it helped to undo that girl culture of I'm supposed to be nice and sweet no matter what, and that that is something I will really always cherish. And and I know we you know, for you guys at home, we probably you're like rolling our eyes out how much we talk about how good our boys are, but they really

really are. And you know, those those three boys, Paul like, they were the crew who kind of really helped me learn um to clap back at that sort of treatment and that it's okay, that it's okay for you to stand up for yourself and not just go okay, yeah, I guess I'll just I just want to be a bigger person. I just want to I don't want to make waves. And that, by the way, someone who's going to call you a bit for saying please, don't speak

to me like that. You don't know me. It's not a person whose opinion you need to care about anyway, you know. And then we've got lovely people like Mark Corrigan on Twitter and we're like, hey, I'm gonna it here and this made me so uncomfortable, and you just go, thank you. We we really do. We have a good crew. That validation that your first instinct is correct and it's all right, you don't have to keep tempering yourself. Yeah, that you're allowed to have feelings even if they aren't like,

you know, nice and neat. I think that that's really important, and interestingly kind of brings us back around to the point of the episode, right like that, that I think is what Nathan and Haley illustrated the best in this episode five is that everybody's got all these feelings and they're not necessarily neat and clean, but to be able to process them together, like that's really what gets you somewhere. That is so true. That's been one of my biggest

lessons in life. That I'm still learning is that it's okay to have messy emotions. It's just it's hard. It's hard to I don't And I don't know if it's a girl culture. I don't know off it. I don't know what it is. I mean, I guess I know some guys who live this way too, so maybe it's not a gender base. I don't know. But the idea that like I want to do everything right, like I don't. I don't like the feeling of realizing I did something

wrong or made a mistake. It's a horrible feeling. It's terrible. But well, the recovery from that and the growth those that, that's what life is about. That's that's where the interest in life is. It's not in the moments where you do everything right. It's in all the moments when you find you've got egg on your face and you have to apologize, and then you grow and you get closer to somebody or um, you learn something that makes you a better person, so then you have something to pass

on to another human being later on down the line. Yeah, yeah, it's important. And and I think the fear that so many of us carry about screwing up Ken in a way. If it gets too out of control, it can really hinder your ability to learn anything, because if you're constantly worried that maybe you're not doing it exactly right, are you really present for the lesson? Oh? Yes, I was like louder I love when I love when I get you to lean back in your office chair. Nailed it.

I love it. Oh, we love you guys. Um Okay, So look, we have a question from Jonathan. He wants to know if you could live in any character's house from One Tree Hill, whose house would it be. Oh? I think I would live in Lucas's house. I love that little craftsman cottagy feeling. I love that style of a home. I don't need a lot. I need land, but I don't need a lot of house. Yeah, oh man, I I don't know. It's funny I have such association with obviously all of the houses on our show for

the characters. I think the place I would be the most amped to have, you know, speaking of our shared love of you know, land and being outdoors, I want Rachel's cabin. Oh, good call, Yes, that's the one I want. Okay, that's that's a good question, Jonathan. Thank you. We needed a little bit of we need a little bit of happiness. Now. By the way, I'm just thinking about how I would redo the cabin. I'm like, let's let's make that stage pest board to look at soon I know it. Oh,

this one's good. Most likely to move back to Wilmington's that's sweet. Gosh, who's most like? Well, Lee Norris did write yeah Lee, Lee and Andrea moved back to Raleigh. Um, oh, gosh, who would want to go back to Wilmington's. Honestly, you know who talks about it all the time is Barbara. Oh yeah, she loved her there. Oh yeah, I mean, gosh. I I don't know. I think if I were ever able to like maintain a summer home like I would love. I would love if we had like a place there

Bill figure eight or something. Oh, it would just be so special. But I gotta say, the lack of a direct flight makes it a no go for me. I totally agree. It's really difficult. It is so hard to get there, and you know, my whole family and my you know, my my crew is in Los Angeles, and the fact that it takes like a nine hour travel day, you know, first flight to last flight, not even like

getting to and from the airport. Oh my god, I know, because you have to wait for that layover, and it's Atlanta or Charlotte is the only two places you can go from l A. It's even from Just coming out from Nashville was tough. I was like, man, I just wish from like Nashville. This should be God right, Swich would get a lot more business if they did. I know, there's a ton of flyover state people and the landlocked people who would sure love access to that beach. But

maybe they like it that way. Who's the big airline there? Now, we should have a chat with them if we could get a direct flight going. Yeah, come on, Delta, come on American, let's go. You call it like the Tree Hill route, let's go. All right. Well, I'm really hoping. Oh no, I was just about to say, I hope we get to laugh more in the next episode. But I feel like, is the next episode prom is it more Derek? Oh no, I don't know either. Episode six

it's called where did You Sleep Last Night? Well, where did Derek sleep last night? Because he got up off the law. I know, Well, we're going to get more of Ernest for sure, because he just got introduced, so that'll be fun to get to know him a little bit more and then, uh, I don't know, we'll see what kind of surprising things await. Thanks for joining us, everybody, Thanks everyone, Hey, thanks for listening. Don't forget to leave

a the review. You can also follow us on Instagram at Drama Queens O t H or email us at Drama Queens at I heart radio dot com. See you next time we are all about that high school drama. Girl Drama Girl, all about them high school queens. We'll take you for a ride at our comic girl cheering for the right Drama Queens draws my girl up girl fashion, but your tough girls, you could sit with us. Girl Drama Queens, Drama Queens, Drama, Queen's Drama, Drama, Queen's Drama Queens