This is doctor Wendy Walsh and you're listening to KFI AM six forty the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app. Welcome back to the Doctor Nims Show on KFI AM six forty nine everywhere on the iHeartRadio App. All right, let me get to social media and your dms if you do want to send me a question. The instagram that we check the most is at doctor Wendy Walsh at d R Wendy Walsh. Reminder, I always say this, Let's say it over and over again.
I'm not a therapist. This isn't mental health advice. This is an opinion by a wise woman who has been reading about the science of relationships and reporting on it and writing about it for quite a few decades. Okay, that's a disclaimer, you know, for the lawyers. Okay, Dear doctor Wendy, I asked a man I was dating to buy me flowers. Three weeks later, he still hasn't. Does this automatically mean the care and respect is not there? Okay,
we need to talk about this. First of all, you don't demand love and attention right at the beginning of a relationship. You watch for sacrifice. Now, when I say watch, I just mean you know, at the beginning, it's always like, you know, the only I don't know how long you've been dating, but you know you're just kind of letting them hang themselves, if you will, letting them figure it out and you say yes or no. But demanding that someone tell you they love you, demanding that someone tell
you you're beautiful, demanding that they give you flowers. Nobody wants to give anything when it's extracted, right, So my answer is it doesn't mean anything. All it means is he doesn't want to be controlled by you.
Right.
Look, I'll never forget. Very early on in my relationship with my now husband Julio, he said to me, I adore you, and I said, oh my god, say it again. Nope, I don't say it on demand. And I laughed. But it taught me you can't ask for care. You sit back, you express your needs. I mean a lot of people don't show where people can be helpful, and then you decide whether you're going to accept it or not. But it's not about demanding because it never feels good when
they have to do it, and it's not authentic. It doesn't even feel good to you.
All right?
Moving on, This is a really interesting question because I'm not one hundred percent sure about what this listener means. But she says, dear doctor Wendy, are sassy men common? I feel more and more men want women to earn their love and treat them in a special way before they begin to act like gentlemen. This has been the
way with my last four dates. All right, So let me explain to you what is really going on right now in a certain age group, Like when women are in their fertility window, right they're mostly in their twenties and thirties. We have an oversupplied successful women and an undersupply of men who those educated women might consider to be marriageable. So there's this small group of the Internet likes to call them alpha males. I like to call
them educated, high earning males. That women who have patriarchy and the cinerella complex inside their own heads think they need a man to look up to who makes more money, who you know, is more educated, whatever. And so this small group of men is being highly sought after by a large group of women, and so men have gotten lazy that group. That group does not have to sacrifice
to earn a woman's love. They don't have to. I remember one time going to a Circusila performance and this there was a couple on a date, clearly in front of me, and she had heels on, her hair and makeup was perfect, she had a lovely little miniskirt on beautiful legs, and she was all dressed up. And he was like in flip flops with a flannel shirt and a backwards baseball cap. I'm like, they don't even try, Like, why even't bother right because she's into me?
Right.
So the answer is, you can eat up your fertility window trying to get one of those men, the small group of sought after men, to commit to you, or you could expand your horizons and look around at all the amazing men out there who might not have your level of education. They might not make as much money. A boy can they love? And boy can they sacrifice for you? You know what I like to say about my husband, Julio,
since the day I met him. Ladies, listen up. Do you know what I carry when I walk through an airport? A cell phone. I'm not allowed to touch any other bag. He schlaps like crazy, my stuff, his stuff, gotta know. I spent years as a single mother pulling strollers and car seats and their bags and my bags, and I was exhausted. So this is my time to be treated like a queen. And I am happy to sit back and be treated like a queen. And so when I was on those dating apps and there were men, how
Pulio's not listening. There are men who might have been better looking, might have been younger, might have had more money, whatever, if they were starting to like cause a delay in the response time on the texts, or if they were being sassy like you're asking, I just got rid of them, A ghosted him. I wanted to be with the man who adored me because it was my time and I deserved that. So yeah, if the last four days you've been on have been with sassy men, don't hope that
they will turn into gentlemen. Don't hope that because it's not happening. Not those guys, right, they have proven themselves. So just move along, move along and expand your horizons. Please. Uh okay, Next back into the DMS on Instagram at dr Wendy Walsh. Dear doctor Wendy, I had a huge fight with my boyfriend and apologize to him. He wants to move on like it never happened. He just went right back to normalcy. Should I move forward with him or push a healing conversation?
Push?
I don't like that word, all right, So what I don't understand here is if you had a fight and you apologized, that was the healing conversation. No, that's probably what he assumes, and the fact that he went back to normalcy tells you that he's over it. Now, I'm wondering if you're not over it and you feel you need more discussion about that, because he seems to be fine with things. Should I move forward with him or
push a healing conversation? I didn't understand. I guess you're saying, should I pretend like nothing happened, moving forward with him the way he's doing, or should you know? It depends what this conversation is. You know, it has to happen at an intimate time when you're cuddling, maybe after you know what, and you just say, hey, baby, with that big fight we had a couple of weeks ago, and I apologize and I'm really sorry. Can we talk about like just what started it? Because I don't want to
have a fight like that ever again. And there are a few things I just want to make clear in a more calm way. Can we just talk about that and we'll go all right? You know you could do that if you really felt like there's you weren't heard. I guess all right. Oh this is a very interesting one, Dear doctor Wendy. I have a friend from my old town who moved to LA. She loves the same books as I do, so I decided to give her a
book I knew that she would love. I asked for her address so I could send it to her, and she responded to me like I was a creep stock trying to stalk her. It was so weird. We go back eight years. I'm offended. What's the best way to address this? Back off, creep? No, I mean, there's something that you said or did at some point in her life that made her not want to give you her address. You have a different perception of this relationship than she does.
Or maybe she's really scared in the big city alone by herself, and she's not giving out her address to anybody. So don't take it personally, don't be offended, don't take it personally. If you want to send her the book, you can send her an email or text that says do you have a mail service or your friend or your work Wise? Can I just send you the book? Because I did buy you this book, but you certainly you seemed a little skittish about giving me your address.
I totally respect that. Don't you worry. Just tell me where I should send it. That's all you need to do. Don't take it personally. Is not about you, all right. When we come back, I have a very special guest. I have to tell you I've been exercising in the last few weeks and my muscles are so stiff. I can't even begin to tell you how sore I am. But we have a doctor coming up who's going to tell all of us how we can do our New Year's resolutions in a way that doesn't kill our body.
You are listening to the Doctor Wendy Wall Show on KFI AM six forty. We're live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI AM six forty.
Welcome back to the Doctor Wendywall Show on KFI AM six forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app. So I got to tell you something. You know, one of the things I teach is psychology of health counseling. Now you would think that if I'm teaching health psychology, there's a lot of stuff about diet and exercise, But actually I teach about how relationships can improve our health or hurt our health, how access to healthcare can help you live longer or not. So I look at the social and
the psychological pieces of health. But you know, back in my day, my day was a long time ago. There were a few decades between my day and now. I was a bit of an athlete. I used to teach about ten aerobic classes a week member Jane Fonda, all those high impact And then my guest is already laughing at my story. I have a great guest coming up, so wait. And then I would run triathlons on weekends.
Uh huh. I was going to see pedietrists sports medicine people because I was putting too much wear and tear. And I was only in my twenties. So anyway, then I spent all those decades basically keeping it together while I had babies, breastfed babies, raised babies, and I exercised in waves. You know, a few months on and then oh a few months off, a little too much eating, get this, five pounds off, back to it, et cetera.
But recently a friend of mine passed away. She had a heart attack all of a sudden, and I went, Okay, I gotta I gotta get serious. I really have to get serious. So I have been doing for the last couple of weeks orange theory. Orange theory. It sounds so nice, like you're just gonna eat an orange. No, no, no, You're running on a freaking treadmill, you're lifting weight, you're rowing. It's a crazy sixty minutes a cardio. And then the next day, in between I go do Lagree pilates, which
is pilates on steroids. My muscles are so stiff, but I'm not gonna quit. And this is where my next guest comes in. Welcome doctor Jim Laval. He is both a pharmacist I like those, and also a register what do you call it, a licensed clinical nutritionist. I say that right, Jim curriical nutritionist, clinical nutrition curicle lectricianist.
Yep.
But get this.
What he does, which is really cool, is He is an ex or two top athletes around the world, not just me, Olympians, NFL players, New England Patriots, Philadelphia Eagles. He's a chief science officer for Lifetime and the former clinical director of the Pro Football Hall of Fame Health and Performance Program. Well, Jim, I need you to be a guest speaker in my class. Actually, so if you're ever out to LA we would love to have you.
So is get out there, soil.
Is it true that most people quit when they do their big New Year's resolutions? You know they're all coming out right the first couple weeks of January they quit because of muscle soreness.
It's true. But you know what, I don't know if this is worth it or not. It just hurts too, That's true. I'm pretty good before I started doing this exercise. And I think the big thing is is that a lot of times people jump in it too hard, too fast, especially if you are a former athlete like me. I didn't say that, you know, But the thing is, I
always say there's two kinds of folks out there. There's spartans, you know, people that if you told them to do, I want you to do these ten things they'll ask you a wedding and you give me twelve. And then there's the everyday person that usually it's better if you kind of guide them and get them started on a program. And I think that's where a lot of people go wrong. If you haven't exercised in years, you want to ease
into your exercise program. And because the big thing is is when you get sore, that really is a matter of too much lactic acid in your muscle. You're not carrying oxygen into your tissues, and that means you're not going to recover as quick. So you can build to that. And there's also you know, nutrients you can take that can help it too. But I think it's real important that people get an idea. I love that you're doing pilates, by the way, that's great, man. You did pick a
tough one. I mean orange theory. Oh that's a tough way to go there.
Yeah, but you know, I learned a cheat already. That's the thing. I'm like, oh yeah, they say go up to level ten on the incline. I'm down there.
We're good.
Okay, It's all I need. At least I know my body. That's the main thing I think that smart.
I want to. I think that's a big one I.
Want to talk about before we get into the nutrients. Let's talk about sleep. Last night. Okay, So I tend to not sleep that much. I used to when I was young, but I've been sleeping six to seven hours a night. I never get eight hours. That's kind of my thing as an adult. Well, last night I slept twelve hours.
Twelve hours, and.
Let me tell you how strong I was when I went to Lagree today. I didn't even take any of the modifications. I didn't relax and go into child's posts once, even those mountain climber things. I was doing it. So sleep is a really big important part of fitness, isn't it.
Thanks on the most important pieces of all things health. If you want to live a long life, fitness it's important because it helps your body. You recover, You get your neurochemical beds and your brain to rejuvenate, so you get serotonin, a dopamine and adrenaline and nor adrenaline back.
And it really resets your circadian clock. So you know, our body runs by a clock, it's called the master slave clock, and when you don't sleep, that clock starts telling the wrong time, meaning that your body now starts sending all kinds of confusing signals on how to release hormones and neurotransmitters, and so getting sleep and feeling rested
is incredibly important. Well, I do like people wearing some sort of you know, heart rate monitor, like whether it's a whoop or an our ring or something that at least tells them the quality of their sleep, because a lot of times people don't realize, hey, I just have one glass of wine at night before bed, and they can see if the patterns of what you eat much drink, how much stress you're under, how that impacts your sleep, and you can begin to learn from it.
I knew you'd bring up the wine problem. I don't want to hear it, but yeah, that is the main thing that helps people sleep is to get off the alcohol. Alcohol takes you down and then it brings you up again. It is not good. All right, let's talk about the three most powerful nutrients that not only accelerate muscle recovery but enhance your immune system so you don't get sick. The first one you mentioned is aged garlic extract. What the heck is that and what's the research behind it.
Yeah, Well, there's over nine hundred publications on aged garlic extract, lots of clinical studies, you know, tier one, you know, primary referee journal studies. UCLA's Department of Cardiology has studied this, so aged garlic extract. You can't eat garlic and get the same results of what I'm going to talk about. Oh aged so age garlic extract, you know, basically get
phaged for twenty months. All the volatile compounds that make you have that stink and rose effect they go away and then a new family of phytochemicals get built through the process of aging. And so that's the first step is that it's a unique compound and what it's been traditionally known for as it reduces blood pressure, It's been shown in human studies to reduce vulnerable plaque, it helps with lipids, so it has a lot of benefits in
human studies. But this is the first study where they really looked at people who are exercising and where the benefit was is people in our age group. Because I'm sixty four, I'm a few years you're senior, and I trained right before I came in to get on the radio.
Tonight's got to be in shape to be on the radio.
Well, you know, you never know who's going to see you. So age when you take AGE garbic extract. What they found out is that it improves something called VO two max. So VO two max is a volume of oxygen, so the volume of oxygen the maximum uptake that you can take in. And then it also helped to reduce muscle pain and also help with fatigue. Now that makes sense. To improve your oxygen, you're going to get rid of your life the gasid better. But it also helped with
blood vessels to get more flexible and impliable. So not so much in a twenty year old to use H garlic extract. This study was that you're over.
Forty we need it right, Yes, okay, we got to go to a break.
This is the top.
We got to go to break. When we come back, we're going to talk about something I take every single day and then beetlejuice. No, I don't mean beetlejuice, I mean beat jue. You guys are not going to believe this. My guest is doctor Jim Laval. He's in Texas, but he is advising top athletes around the country, even us. You're listening to The Doctor Wendy well Show on KFI AM six forty Live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI AM six forty about the ba's.
The Doctor Windiwells Show in PFI AM six forty Live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app. My guest is both a pharmacist and a licensed clinical nutritionist and an advisor to athletes around the world the world. Doctor James Laval is telling us how we can eat better to have better health, better immune system, and mostly have our muscles recover. So when we hit that New Year's resolution and we hit the gym, we're going to recover fast. So can we
talk about my favorite nutrient of all time? Probiotics?
Go for it absolutely, so you know, once again we think of probiotics. Hey, I'm trying to get a better bowel movement. I may you know, you may realize that it helps with the immune system, but when you're taking probiotics, it actually helps to modulate inflammation signaling. It comes from your gut because seventy percent of your immune response comes from your gut. So when they gave recreational runners a
four week probiotic regiment. What happened was, first of all, the number of days you know, if they got a bug, number of days treated, the number of days of severity all went down and you got the benefit of the immune function. Now, the big thing is I teach a lot of professional teams. The harder you exercise, the more your beneficial flora get challenged. So if you're working out
thirty to forty five minutes, it's one thing. But if you're saying an athlete or you're an endurance runner, and you're training two hours or three hours or four hours and you're playing a game, it can really start to disrupt your microflora or your microbiome. And what that does. It changes mood, changes bow habits, ability to be able to absorb nutrients. You'll be more prone to colds and flus.
So I love people, you know, thinking about probiotics because they're so important to your health, and also getting fiber with them so that you supply the food that probiotics need.
Yeah. I always says the bugs need the right nutrition for their garden. So let me tell you how crazy and nerdy I am about probiotics. I go to the glassed in fridge. At Whole Foods, I find the one that has the most billions in it, and I bring a little ice back to carry it home, because I don't even want those bugs to die on the way home. But let me tell you my reason why I love probiotics. Besides it's so good for the immune system. I didn't know about the muscle recovery and all that stuff.
Is.
You know, ninety percent of our serotonin, which is our natural antidepressant, is manufactured in our gut, and psychologists will often refer to our gut as our second brain. And keeping the flora and fauna in our gut happy keeps our moods uplifted. And that's why I'm a big believer in probiotics.
Okay, I agree with you more. You got to keep that in tear it nervous systems signal in the right direction. Okay, that's good stuff. And now, of course, the other piece to this is is that there's another ingredients called plant sterols and sterolins, and credible they come from obviously vegetable source, and sterols and sterolins In a marathon runner studies showed that when they gave them their endurance athletes wh would normally be susceptible up a respiratory track infections. It modulated
their immune system. They didn't get sick, and they could get back to their training quicker. I use sterols and sterolins. It's known as mogicare. I use that a lot of individuals, not just athletes, because eighty percent of the people that I see in the clinics or all the docs that I teach at the American Accounty of Niaging Medicine, they're just everyday people trying to fight off colds and flues. They're working out, they're under stress, they're not getting enough sleep,
maybe not picking the right foods. And that's why I think, you know, especially the age garlic extract known as kyola in this magicare are really core.
So if I go to my regular vitamin store and I just say plant sterols, it's going to give me some kind of pill.
I take.
Is that what it is?
That's a point to be a capsule or a chewable tablet. You would you would you would want sterols and steroloins. You would ask them for magic care because it's the only one that has the studies behind it or the right ratios of the plant fats ye magic care.
Yeah, we don't have a whole lot of time left, but really quickly, I want to go through four quick ways to mitigate muscle soreness. What the heck with the bee juice? The beat juice? There's juice that's from beats.
Yeah, you've seen a lot of bee juice powders being advertised, and they do work because it increases nitric oxide. And when you increase and you increase nitric oxide, you get better blood flow to your muscles. And that means you're going to get rid of that lactic acid and you're going to be able to sustain your exercise longer by improving your blood perfusion. The other one drink coffee.
It's okay, that is the best news I ever got today because I have been my entire life a four cup a day. Girl. You don't think I talk like this on the radio for hours without caffeine behind me. Oh my god, I have to lecture for three hours to students. I need my latte in front of me. So it's actually good for me.
Coffee is good for you. You drink a cup of coffee before your workout and it will reduce your muscle soreness known as DOMS, the late onset muscle soreness, which is what you're getting from doing your orange theory and then going and doing nearly grev Yeah pilates. Is you've soared for two or three days, almost fifty percent reduction in soreness. When you drink a cup of coffee before you do your workout.
I have a secret to tell you, so way back when, when I was young and fit in in my twenties and teaching those ten classes of aerobics, I would actually drink I have a stomach of iron. I would drink a strong coffee right before teaching those classes. So now I can't get it was actually a good.
Thing, way ahead of your time, my time.
Who knew?
All right?
And my other favorite thing is I'm a touchy person and I love my dopamine is what.
Get a massage, I mean, getting a massage is amazing. You can break up all the you know, any of the scar tissue. You can release the fat so you know, when you work out a lot, the fashion can get kinked, so you can work out the fashion get the blood flow back into those muscles. So massage is great. If you can't afford a massage, buy a phone roll.
Oh I know, I hate those things. They hurt so much.
You can get it. You can get a therapy gun now, they's so they're so common now, the massage guns. They can really help to to do that before and or after your workout. It can really help them move the lactic acid out of your tissues. So I agree things.
I would just rather pay a human to touch me, just saying.
Hey, Jim, it's being a new robotic massages.
No, not a chair, a little robot.
No, no, no, it's a robot hands actually, Okay, I'm.
Gonna have to check it out. I do talk to my chat GBT all day. We have weird conversations, so why not have one touch me? I don't know, Jim, what a pleasure. If you're ever out in La reach out, I'd love to have you come talk to my health psychology class, and it's been a pleasure. We're all going to get in shape of the new year, right, We're all going to do this this year.
Absolutely, let's do it.
Thanks for being with us. You've been listening to the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show on KFI Am six forty. I'm here every Sunday from seven to nine pm. Otherwise. You can follow me on my social media at doctor Wendy Walsh, but I'm always here for you. You've been listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh, you can always hear us live on KFI AM six forty from seven to nine pm on Sunday and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app