Episode #46: Benefits of Avoiding Porn - Dr. Trish Leigh

hey zach welcome back to the podcast porn brain rewire i'm glad to have you back here for some more interesting discussions right hey dr lee i'm looking forward to it looking forward to i enjoyed the last one so i'm looking forward to this one yeah me too and i appreciate you being here because i really think um people can learn from you and i kind of waxing poetic together about your experience especially as a an example for people who are struggling and are stuck in a loop and they just have no idea how to get out of that loop and you know you're a testament to if you do the right things and you have the right support you can keep moving forward so i love it and then being able to talk about the brain mechanisms behind it is obviously always fun for me too so yeah i love it what are we talking about today what's up so we're going to be talking about the benefits to avoiding porn so this is supposed to be the lighter more fun looking forward to because i think it's so serious and there's so much shame and guilt tied to it that like we have a tendency not to celebrate the successes because we're so fixated on the failures so i wanted to talk about hey here's some ways that you can watch out for that your brain and your actions are gonna start to improve as you get away from porn yeah i love it and i just recorded a podcast with someone else yesterday and we were talking about and i kind of stayed focused on it because i think it's really important it ties into what you're saying is that you know when i talk with people before they get into our program there are you know and the biggest question is how long is this going to take and what i was talking about yesterday is that it doesn't have to take that long to begin to feel the benefits and that's something that i wanted to make sure we focus on that it doesn't take that long for you to know you're moving in the right direction and for you to get all the way there that might take some time but to know that you're moving in the right direction can can happen pretty quickly and yesterday the gentleman i was talking about he talked about how he gained sobriety pretty quickly once he got into the program but he didn't feel free freedom came later on and you know after 90 days he knew he was moving forward in sobriety and setting and laying that foundation for continual success but it was until not that much later on but a little bit later on where he felt truly free where the pull back wasn't there anymore and so you know let's dig into how people can feel that first initial yes my brain is on wiring and i am moving in the right direction and then how they can feel my brain's rewiring and i'm moving towards hardwiring in the new better brain pattern sure unfortunately for me the process of getting sober has taken 14 or 15 years so why you and i exist is to make it so let's shrink 15 years to a year 100 100 and you know and i always share the experiences of the first client that i worked with the one that you know really ramped up i didn't really care about corn before but ramped up my passion is because it was five excruciating years like not just and so like i think it's a really good example because some people when they make the decision and they commit it can be pretty quick to go from where you're at to sober to free and if you don't commit but you pretend to commit is really what happened in in the case of the my client which i'm calling sam these days where it was like pretending to commit and then seeking out all the wrong people an accident the hijacker seeking out the wrong people to help giving the wrong advice faking you know steps having you know difficulty getting into that but just kind of making it a really tough five years and then finally committing when the losses were so high because we know that's how the brain works when the losses are high you know commitment can happen much more easily and really that's because his wife was making him do it and he wasn't even on board with the program until four years and you know four and three quarters years later but and for you you know if you made that commitment to yourself but it's you didn't know what to do and you didn't have the right strategies and you didn't have the right support people can stay in this thing for decades and so many people i work with they've tried and then kind of you know settled back into just the you know what they had going on the habit they had before and then try again and it takes 14 to 15 years right and it's frustrating for me because right now i'm going through your program i'm like halfway through it i'm really loving it i'm like this is the freaking road map like i didn't have this and i had to figure it out on my own and it's the worst and so i'm really hoping that we can get this out to people so that they can have the road map so that it's it's not you're doing it by yourself and it's not you figuring it out on your own yeah absolutely and i just wanted to comment and i know i shouldn't focus on haters but i'm going to just share one hater comment because of course hater comments hit the nervous system a little and there was a hater comment that said you're really good at promoting your program and i thought to myself i'm actually terrible at promoting my program like i hardly talk about it when i'm talking about you know i have there's 400 videos on youtube but i barely mention my program i just mentioned at the end real quick what i'm very good at promoting is the actual solution and that i'm very proud of because the program that i built is built on the actual solution so i want people to know like i'm not promoting a program here i'm promoting the solution and the way i put it together absolutely works and there's a few other people in this space who have a program that actually works there's many people who have programs that don't work so i just want people to get into a program like you said that doesn't take 15 years that doesn't take an excruciating five years that takes 90 days to get towards the sober and you know you're moving towards it and you're moving towards freedom within the next year you're laying that foundation you're feeling better every minute so just just to i just want to make sure that it's explicitly out there that's why i want people in the program because it is the solution it's the roadmap right right right well let's uh let's get started on talking about the benefits right yeah let's see what you've been seeing when you uh when you're avoiding porn yeah i can start um i think my number one best benefit for avoiding porn is better sex which is what i've always wanted i wanted great sex and you know that's the that's the man's perspective but it's so funny because someone also wrote on youtube yesterday you shouldn't be talking to men about porn and masturbation because you're uh you're a cat it's like the cat teaching a dog tricks and what i was going to say is my perspective actually isn't in the women's perspective perspective it's the neuroscience perspective because my number one benefit is you stop damaging your brain and you heal your brain and your brain works better for you for your whole life long but of course men want more better sex right right well and what's been impressive about listening to your material is it seems like you get it so i i hear the argument of the dudes are like we want to hear dude because a dude will understand us what you'll find is as we're having a conversation i'm just going to be repeating a lot of the things i'm just going to be giving personal examples of all the things that you talk about anyways so don't listen to the haters i know i don't know and but you know it really is having you know the human experience life is supposed to be fun and enjoyable and if you're going into a screen to escape it and especially if you have a honey next to you that you should be enjoying and having a fun exciting engaging time with and you're not you're wasting your time in the screen instead of investing your time in your partner and in your own life so you know having a good sex life is part of that and you know that's why in so many of the videos i say if you don't have a honey get out of the screen and invest your time and energy and taking the steps to do that and so many of the guys i'm working with are doing that right now and it's so cool the benefits like to talk about the benefits and then you can tell us you know you can share what you were going to is approaching people has become like the biggest gift that they've been able to give themselves because their social anxiety's gone down and they feel more confident and you shared this last time so it's like there's so many benefits but uh i digress go on share what you're gonna cut you off sorry no you're great you're great so porn really sets the expectation bar really really high and it also sets the expectations to something that doesn't even apply to sex so so for instance you know if i want to become a great pilot i don't go watch top gun like top gun is great you'll you'll see the cool spinnies and stuff that the the airplanes do those are great but if i actually want to learn about how to be a pilot i go sit in a cockpit i have someone teach me i go to school for it right i actually learned about what it is actually to be a pilot so watching that movie is setting your expectations too high so for instance if you were going into sex thinking sex is 100 visual you are going to be so disappointed because sex isn't 100 visual sex is partly visual but it's also touching its foreplay it's emotions whereas when you're watching porn it's a hundred percent visual it's all about the visual so not having these unrealistic expectations of what sex is going to look like how sex is going to feel improves how sex feels so that was the first point do you have any thoughts on that yeah i love that because you know i feel like i have to remind people more frequently than i want to that it's fake porn's face and so like top guns just a movie it's fake you know and i love that because you can't learn real skills and abilities from just watching something that's fake and i also love what you say is that if you want to become a pilot you actually have to put some time in experiencing it not just consuming it and there is a level of intention and being able to engage and to be able to have that you know be an experience and so and you're totally right porn makes it so that it's a performance and then you learn to be a performer in your own sex life instead of being someone who's experiencing that and is trying to make it a mutually shared experience and that's very different in the brain too just to bring it back to the brain mechanisms is when you are in performance mode and you're trying to gain as much pleasure as possible from either consuming the performance or trying to do it yourself you're just looking for as much dopamine as possible and like you said you can't get it in life it doesn't exist that's why porn's a super normal stimulus at the on the second hand is that you shouldn't even want it because it's frying your brain because it is super it's too much it's not healthy and it is the thing that's causing erectile dysfunction that's causing brain fog causing lack of motivation anxiety depression it's frying your brain so when you go back into the world and there isn't enough dopamine there your partner could never give you that amount right and so continuing with the pilot analogy on other problems with that porn causes to sex so if you're sitting in your pilot class and you're imagining tom cruise in his cool jacket and you're like man i want to be cool like tom cruise and you're completely missing what the teacher is teaching you you're not engaged and you're you're out of it your brain is in another place right so part of the problem that i had seen in my own life i've and i've talked to guys who have have had this problem as well is that because you are committing hopefully eventually to one person and you're like this is the person i want to be with is the person i want to have sex with is the person i want to spend my life with you you begin to have a problem with a lack of variety right because that's all that porn is is variety so what happens to a lot of guys is that they begin imagining other women or the beginning begin imagining different situations with their partner because there may be things that she doesn't want to do and so when you begin doing that you basically use the person that you're with as help with masturbation is basically what it is you're not in it you're not trying to con connect with this person and it feels the same so it's not something i'm i'm proud of but you know there there was a time where i was struggling with that and i saw that when i was engaged with my wife it felt amazing i felt connected to her sex didn't come with guilt or shame it was just completely awesome great but there were times where i began imagining things and it disconnected me it decreased the enjoyment and then guilt and shame were tied back to it it felt very similar to when i was used to masturbating watch pornography and it felt the same way and that's and that stemmed from me watching pornography is that i'm like i gotta have variety i gotta have variety and that's that's a problem because that's not what sex is absolutely and that's and i want the way i talk about it is the dr jekyll and mr hyde syndrome so and especially when you're on a journey out of foreign consumption fantasy becomes such a major issue and because your brain's used to going there and it wants that and it wants those extra high levels of dopamine which you can't get from your partner if you're doing things that are healthy and remember a porn habit is the most manifest manifested way of hypersexuality hyper meaning too much not healthy so when you're in those moments with your partner and your brain has to trail off it's trailing off into the mr hydeness to get more dopamine because it's not getting the amount from your partner that it's used to from the screen and that will be a transition period from sobriety to freedom and it's a journey and the and again of course when we do these podcasts i like to be able to give people actual action steps so an action step there is when your brain tries to go to fantasy don't let it because you're giving it more dopamine within the experience with your partner which means it'll take longer for you to be able to be with your partner at those lower levels of dopamine healthy good levels of dopamine serotonin oxytocin that give you that experience instead of the performance so if fantasy comes in or you feel the need to go off and to think about new novel you know either acts or people or anything that you've seen in the past bring your brain back to the present and get back into the experience and and you know i know a lot of people struggle with that because some people have erectile dysfunction or delayed ejaculation during that experience it's not the same as it was but when you don't use your partner as an object for your own pleasure you're using it as the experience it begins to shift and that might not be perfect it might be messy for days weeks months hopefully not longer than months if it's messy for years it means that you've either watched porn and your brains just fired up those neural pathways again or you're going to fantasy too much and a bunch of people but i many people i work with will tell me this and one guy in particular i probably said it to you before where he's like so i'm supposed to be thinking about my wife when i have sex yes you are my friend every time not sometimes every time and you know that is a new that's not a thing he's done for 25 years so if that if you're not doing that you know and if it's difficult for you to do that there needs to be reevaluation with your sex life and your partner and conversation communication and interaction around it right and i know this podcast is more about the benefits of porn but just how i had to stop because it happened the way that it's always happened to me in the past where i say i'm never going to do it and then it slips in once and i'm like okay i won't do it again and then it increases it starts to become a habit and i caught it pretty quickly seeing that there were problems and first i went to she actually asked me one time like you didn't seem like you were all there and i lied and one of my rules is that i don't lie to my wife if i you know as best i can right really truly don't don't lie no as best i can you and i will have to talk about that off-camera right right right as best because it should be the thing is when it's radical honesty as you know from anna lemke like that's what frees you and i'm sure and i'm gonna let you keep going because i'm sure there's shame associated with that right yeah and and so first i i talked to the guy that's head of my uh like overcoming porn group you know and he's like can't lie to your wife man you gotta you gotta tell her that you lied to her and so i knew going in this was going to wreck her and so you know and different people with different situations are gonna have to really think this through but for me it was in order for me to stop this this thing that's becoming a habit i have to talk to her and like you were saying earlier i have to put consequences on certain actions and reward good actions and so that was a consequence that was a major consequence to me and it really pulled me out of it and that's amazing see see i would encourage and let me just interject for one second then i promise won't be too long is that i try to encourage everybody to just get honest with their partners and that like i get it and i know what you're saying about it's going to be each person's journey is different and i just wanted to highlight the parameters of why so you're still with your wife which means she it did wreck her and it became a difficult thing for her to handle but it's rupture and repair so if there's a rupture in your relationship and if she's emotionally mature enough to handle it enough in the moment and to work with it to become even more emotionally mature don't get me wrong it sucks and there's a ton of pain and everybody involved is stressed out but the rupture becomes the repair you actually have a better relationship and you get to be your true authentic self who doesn't have to hide stuff from anybody and you know i think we all deserve to be in relationships like that because life's way too short to have to hide anything from the person who's supposed to be your partner in crime and have your back and so the cool thing is if you can tell her that you've messed up you know you're on a journey and you're not a perfect person but if you can tell her that you've messed up and she can be with you in that it might not be great but she doesn't bounce on you and she doesn't abandon you because at the core of a lot of this is fear of abandonment too so when she shows up for you and she doesn't abandon you and you tell her the truth and you don't abandon her back into porn you're both better off for it and your relationship's better off for it but i work with people who you know they've got 30 40 50 years of lies and they don't want to have to own up to 50 years of lies and i said to one guy like why not at this point like at this point either either repair that relationship with your wife or figure it out and at least have an amazing 20 years last 20 25 years of your life free from all the shame of all of this like you know people at the end of their life they regret that stuff moving through the number one regret at the end when people are dying is living an inauthentic life

so like let's do the tough stuff to get authentic and be who we are and then make it the best version well and i'm happy you went in that direction because another benefit that i was going to mention today was becoming a better version of yourself and so throughout my relationship like i was saying i've been as brutally honest as possible and so there was a time when i had put up all these blocks and i was having a hard time getting access to stuff and i was dating my now wife and one of the things i was doing she she was living in her house i was living in a different house and so i would leave her house at night and i would drive home and i would start to get this desire to stop at walmart and like pick up something that i can have for visual stimulation right and so she called me the first time i show up and she's like hey how are you doing i just want to call call you real quick and then she's like what's that noise behind you and in my head i wanted to be like you know i got the radio on or something i'm like oh i'm in walmart and she's like oh you're getting like a treat or something you're getting the snack a midnight snack and i was like no no i'm not she's like well what are you doing and i could not figure out a way around not telling the truth of why i was at walmart that happened three times where she called me on my way home hey what are you doing i'm at walmart and it stunk because every time i knew where it was going to go yeah i i love that i have a lot to share on that but finish first and so i'm no longer running around hiding myself doing things that i feel guilty about that like oh if she catches me if my wife catches me and believe me dudes to an extent she's always gonna know like something something is up i've i did not know this it's like a it's like a superpower women have i did not know they had the superpower they know they know something is up and you know she's always found out whether it's because i've had to tell her the truth in a situation or she could just tell by my demeanor that something is not right and so i can be myself every day i don't have to be a different person and that gets us closer and that takes all that weight and all that shame and guilt off me absolutely so let me ask you this this is the thought that i was gonna have and then i'll kind of talk about the takeaway so what were those moments eye-opening for you or her like just let's just use the walmart example when she called you and you had that twinge of panic on on time number three did it resonate for you or for her like man i cannot believe i'm i have to pick up this phone for the third time and tell her i'm at walmart or on the other end when she called you and she's like he's at walmart again trying to get some visual stimulation i think those moments can be really powerful in the transformational journey that we're talking about and and i'll just tell you why and then maybe you can tell me like kind of your internal state or if you and your wife had discussion about this because when people watch porn that's a pretty easy thing to go you know i know i watch porn because it's porn and it makes my brain feel good and it's so great but then when you find yourself in these like lower level i need to get a hit behaviors that are porn adjacent someone that i talked with called and i like that they're like you know slippery slope behaviors where where you're like i can't believe i'm doing this again because i need a hit did that help you go like yeah this must be a problem and help and your wife even your wife when she's like like i get why he watches porn because porn's porn but like a third walmart trip this must be an actual problem for him right and and that was the because i told her straight up when we first started dating it was within a couple weeks i was like just saying no i have been struggling with porn since i was 14. she knew right off the bat but she didn't really know like i didn't lie and i did come clean but it was in moments like that where and there was lots of moments where she caught me trying to trying to look stuff up and she had to know the depth of the problem and it stinks because it's painful but the good things about pain is that like you said earlier i have a person who loves me enough to go through the pain of knowing that i'm fantasizing about being with other people and so that shows me that she does truly love me and for me it it provided consequences to my actions and i wish that it had been able to come in another way than hurting my wife but it didn't it came in the form of hurting her realizing there are consequences to my actions and then continuing to move away i i believe since that third time i i haven't ever been back to walmart to do that like i'm i'm pretty sure it's been it's been a couple years i think so yeah i mean that's great and that's what i mean is like you know where you know those kind of lower level behaviors really can be like what am i doing like you know and being honest about it even though it really does stink for everybody involved but then then like you don't have to do it anymore and it's like uh it's really powerful people have no idea the power behind that because then you can just be well she trusts me so you can't you can't put a price on that she i can tell her something so for instance the software i'm using right now to kind of block my computer for whatever reason it picked up victoria's secret i didn't type that in but it went to her uh and she was like were you typing in victoria's secret and i was like no babe i wasn't doing that i wasn't and so then she believes it yeah exactly yeah because i've proven to her that i will tell her the truth when it when it's destroyed yes yes i love it that's great that's awesome stuff there you go that's amazing benefit amazing benefit so that's that's two so we've got better sex better become a better version of yourself you want to do one more yeah that's nice so

i have i have two in mind i'll let you choose which one you would like to go with i have smarter so you end up becoming smarter slash more successful uh more clearer conscience so and i have a direction i could go with either one is there one you would prefer yeah let's go with uh let's go smarter and more successful because i think or at least i feel like you know we've we've kind of talked about i know we can definitely go more with clearer conscience but i love the idea because i'll just kind of lead in with a brain idea and then you can share because so i always talk about how when you watch porn and especially if you're caught in a porn habit your brain's electrical energy pattern swings to the extremes to extra fast and extra slow speed and it will either stay there which will keep driving you back into the screen or it'll swing and you'll have the pendulum effect you'll have high highs low lows but the point is your brain's performance pattern is out here less than optimal when your brain's performance pattern is in the middle when you're not watching porn and you're getting on purpose then your brain is working better and this middle performance pattern is actually associated with higher iq not that i even really care about iq but the point is when your brain is in the middle you can get into the zone you can tap into your creativity you can figure out how to implement it which not only gets you more money makes you feel better and you have ideas and you're in that thrive mode in creation you're not out here in survival mode where you're just figuring out how to escape the feeling that your brain's giving you so it literally goes back to when you come out of the screen your brain optimizes itself and now you're able to use it and then obviously that's a huge benefit and that benefit shows up in every single realm of your life in terms of success right right yeah it actually porn addiction shrinks the gray matter in your brain and for for people who and the white matter too actually both have been shown wow so and white angry matter and you it literally damages the cells structurally and it significantly impairs function so structure and function are impaired and it knocks out the frontal lobe and desensitizes the reward center those are the main things right when i was in group the other day with one of the guys was talking and he was right he wrote out like a journal entry and he was reading it to us and he was like man you know i looked at porn the other day and i just i couldn't concentrate at work and i just had this fog in my head where i just couldn't think clearly i was like had we had we talked about this before that that's a sign that that would happen he's like nah man i'm just i was just writing it down i was like yeah dude like that's that's a big sign that of the the damage so when you when you avoid porn you think clearly you make better choices and you're going to do better at school do better at work men typically are success driven if you want to be more successful stay away from this stuff because it will it won't make you successful but it will remove a hindrance to becoming successful absolutely and you know when you get on purpose and you figure out the thing that you want to do that's the best way to be successful at the thing that you want to do it's the thing you care about you know that's what purpose is purpose is that you're contributing to the world in a meaningful way that's important to you not your brother not your girlfriend it's the thing that you want so you have that internal drive in the first place you're internally motivated to make the thing happen but porn is totally blocking you from doing that because your brain's you know all messed up and it's damaged so absolutely like you know it i so i believe if you get on purpose and you bring your brain back it's almost guaranteed success you know and like i think it will make you successful purpose is what makes you successful and then not not blocking yourself or self sabotaging yourself from being able to use that flow brain pattern you know when you're in flow you basically can create thing that you want to you can be the best painter the best plumber the best parent you know that's why it shows up anywhere any anything that you want to do and you know but it doesn't mean you'll be the best soccer player in the world no unless you inherently like soccer and are good at it you know so that's what purpose is you're good at a thing and you want to do it and then then you get your brain in the right spot and uh and it's in the program where i talk about me high chick sent me high and flow state and that's what flow state is the people who are most successful in the world they're tapping into the innate thing that's in them and then using their brain so well that they're able to just flow through their lives and they're able to to create the best version of themselves in the work that they want to do and everybody deserves that that's right that's right yeah if if you're thinking clearly so there's there's meaning and then there's purpose so you're talking about purpose purpose is the how you're going to get to meaning meaning is the why why are you doing things um i'm forgetting the philosopher's name at the moment um that said the man who has a y can bear almost any how is that right did i flip it no that's that's right i think that's right yeah yeah nietzsche yeah i think that's yeah um and so if you're not thinking clearly how are you going to discover me your your meaning right how are you going to say okay what is most important to me why am i doing what i'm doing right you're not thinking clearly so you're not going to even begin to think deeply right and then purpose is okay once i know my why your why could be family it could be religion it could be politics well okay so now the the how i'm getting to the why is i'm i'm going to become a pastor i'm going to become an artist like you said i'm going to become a politician i'm going to become a father that is how i achieve my why my meaning and you're not going to even begin to to be able to concentrate on these things with any depth um if you're if you're looking at the stuff regularly you may actually on it some but it's not exactly i know people and you know i think we talked to you and i talked about this is that sometimes people think it's making their work better or their purpose better because they feel so good you know their brain feels good at certain points but it it definitely tips into where it's detracting from your ability and i was going to bring it back to brain stuff for a second and then we can put a bow on it button it up is that when you go into porn it's constant pleasure seeking to offset pain we know this and some people will go that's not me but inherently you might not know it's you you go a couple layers down generally speaking there's a reason you're going into porn and it's to get intense pleasure for a time to offset some pain and that's the pendulum effect you swing between pleasure and pain which is the total opposite of when you're on purpose and you're seeking meaning all purpose and meaning comes back to a feeling and the feeling should be peace so you know i like to keep things easy like instead of pleasure and pain peace and joy and happiness should be at the end of the why and and people forget that too because when in my in my program or in the solution when we set goals for the future it's not just achievement in like a classic modernized societal way it is that we set goals and we understand the feelings that we're trying to get from our goal so like why are you with your wife you're with your wife because it's a feeling of love and peace and safety and contentment and laugh you know being able to laugh and have fun those are all feelings that's the feeling that you get and that's what when you're on purpose in your work you feel driven to the feeling being able to contribute to the world and to help people and it makes you feel good and whole and it gives you peace at the end of the day and people forget that like it's not just to achieve it's the feeling at the end of the day right you could you can just see your wife as the the thing i have sex with and the thing that brings me food or whatever neanderthal thinking or you can see this person as a whole human being that you want to connect with closer and more intimately than you have with any other person and to me i would rather have a deeper meaning to my marriage then i like that she has sex with me you know yeah exactly and that's why that was the point about you know the gentleman that i work with it's like you know and and you know it had been 25 years that he and his wife barely had sex and he was keeping all these lies from her like what's the point even if you could get 10 more years out of a genuine authentic relationship that was shared and deeply connected and that involves intimacy and vulnerability which are two terrifying things to most people and and they're extra terrifying if you're roped into porn okay let's wrap it up so our takeaways are going to be there's oh there's massive amount of benefits we've only covered a couple of them here seriously it's going to make you it's going to make you smarter it's going to make you more successful leaving porn behind it clears your conscience by radical honesty zach and i are going to talk about the fact that he's almost always almost always honest with his wife we're going to work on that one oh i know my husband and i we have a thing where it's like where he's like you know i'm so honest with you i share my feelings that's what he says to me all the time i share my feelings with you more than any man on earth because like he'll wake up and be like my shoulder hurts and he's like i've been on this cleanse you know and it's making me bloated i'm like dude you shared the honest truth about what's going on with your physical state or issues you see with me let's start sharing more feelings you know that's what he's like i share it more than anybody but uh you know so the point is then you can connect with people on a much deeper level and you know he and i laugh more than any couple we it's our our wedding anniversary is next wednesday night and wednesday is our 20th wedding anniversary which is really cool so we went to buy new wedding bands we're getting new wedding vans for our 20th anniversary and we were at the jewelry store and the we weren't even doing anything honestly but we have a really cool connection we always have you know we have a fun relationship a nice relationship and uh the guy goes the guy kept saying the jeweler who was helping us he's like you two are funny

we weren't even doing this like you two are funny and then my husband got the sizing thing stuck on his finger i knew it was gonna happen too he pops that like the big ring with like 50 other sizing rings right right pops it onto his finger real fast and i'm thinking dude you probably should start with a bigger size and you definitely should be sliding that thing on slower it was stuck on his finger for like 20 minutes they had to use windex to get it off and so of course it became this thing but uh you know i'm like radical honesty involves more than how your physical state is today um what was our first what was our first benefit because i was bringing this back better sex how could i forget that one so there's so many benefits so if you're the one i'm focusing on exactly and and you know that's why you know people really the urgency comes to leave porn behind when they figure out they have erectile dysfunction or they might so you know not having to worry about that and having better sex is definitely a major motivator for people so and and if you are looking for help um you can go to dr trisley.com and uh zach i was going to tell you i actually haven't told you this that i was going to have a zack page made on dr trish lee.com so they'll we'll put the videos of you and we'll get some information about you and you'll have your own page there so if people are looking for more information or more content from you we can get it going right there sounds great i thought that'd be cool okay so we will see you next time thanks for joining me again zach i appreciate it all right thanks