DLUTI 074 - COVID CORNER

And now you can see by the number that's ticking up. We're recording. Wow, I know how about that. And that crazy. Holy cow. Typically we give Jason like 15 seconds until I interrupt him and start the show. And it's been 15 seconds. So.

All right, well, I'm playing the part of Jason tonight.

Yeah. Hello, everybody. Hello. Welcome to kind of dont look under the internet. You're looking at like 1/3 of it. Tell us just

don't look under Google.

Yeah, there you go. I'm, I'm Michael. As you all know, I'm a little under the weather. And I missus my missus, Michael. This is my wife, Larry. Hi, Laura. Laura is joining today because I have COVID. So the boys couldn't come over to record. And I still want to put something out today for you guys. So we're just kind of we're down here. Now.

We're down here. Yeah.

So this is COVID corner. Corner COVID corner,

hopefully COVID corner.

So I do want to go through you know the normal things real quick. I don't know if you listen Laurie out. But we have housekeeping where I clap my head like this. I go duty. Housekeeping. Yeah. And then that's when we go over all the things that we have to okay, go over the things or the things we have to go over as we need to take notes or no. Are you sure? Yes. So here's what you have to go over. Patreon. We usually go over in this. We have one that I don't remember if I shouted out

I mean, oh, I was not to fuck. I'm trying to prepare and he's like, no, just go with

it. Off the fucking hinges. All right. All right. No. So Laurie, tell told the people about yourself. I'm going to

interview Oh, good. My favorite thing is to be interviewed. Tell the people about you. Oh, well, I'm married to Michael. You are? Yes. We have our one year anniversary coming up. We do. Yeah, yeah. So that's exciting. I know. went by quick.

Yeah, it really did. We went to for our honeymoon went out to the northeast. We did and I think I mentioned it on the show when we did it. I hope so. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Because I mentioned the bridge.

Oh, the bridge. Yes. Haunted or spooky. We had to we had to check out the way that was in Vermont. Yeah, Emily is bridge Emily's bridge. That was it. you wound up with some bruises I did back from her. Very angry keeping

all my costs and everything so you know, I'm not faking it.

Yeah, I know. He's real. Another thing about myself as I'm a nurse so that

isn't there. She's been taking care of me this whole time which is Yeah,

it's really sucks. Having to go to work take care of people come home take care of people. It's just unending had to move all my stuff to a different bathroom. Yesterday didn't have to do Yeah, but the thought of you just coughing and hacking all over the you know my my toothbrush and and yet we sleep in the same bed. Well, you know, it's a king sized bed. What are you gonna do? I'm not giving up my bed, man. I love that thing.

I put way too much meal and that. Oh, that's so sweet. Laurie, where are we going on our one year anniversary? Tell the people because I didn't forget. Oh, right.

Uh huh. So we're gonna look at the Smoky Mountains, smokers smokers. You know, we hope to see all the smoke that they have to offer. If I don't see smoke, these mountains Don't be so mad. Turn me around. Take me off

small game blown fuse. Yeah.

So we have a literal cabin in the woods that we're going to die saying and bears aplenty from what I gather. But yeah, so we're staying in a cabin in the woods. We're driving down and you may never hear from us again.

Yeah, buddy if you're listening to this when it comes out you may become the permanent third member of delivery because I may not be here anymore. All right, we should probably will this house to either dog or Jason are both or both. They can live here. That'd be a fun sitcom. It was too fucking buffoons in a house together dead

friend's house. Yeah, their differences we can haunt them makes for great comedy. Like two men.

Was it two men shot? What's it going to man a

baby and a pizza shop? That is 100% the name of the Ryan Reynolds show. Right? Wow, you were just all over the place to two guys. A girl in a pizza place. Yeah. Ryan Reynolds show. Yeah, that's what I mean to men and another separate thing completely. But I appreciate the effort.

Thank you. Yes. Oh, we

might die in the woods. But that's fine. Yeah, because we like spooky things. And it's getting to be spoken season here.

Yeah. Oh, I'm very excited for that. We're always we're Halloween people. I think everyone that's listening. Figure that out a long time. I hope we're all Halloween

everybody. Only the good people are Halloween people

so even I mean even this year for Halloween we're I mean again I don't know if you listened last time the lair? No. But we did the hometown horrors. Oh, yes. Where we had maybe I should start last night where people call in and tell us their spooky scary scary stories. Yeah, so Laurie. Do you have any Spooky Scary Stories? Do I have any anything? That's what happened to you? And not just the time that your cat tried to get you lost in the woods?

Oh my god. That was a real thing. Speaking of cats that's Otto he wants to be a member of the party. He means usually he's usually locked upstairs during this portion of the evening

not today not today. This is diluted we don't care COVID corner yeah COVID corner where we don't care and I don't care right. I just wanted a

normal normal night comes around the boys come over and and we have a little cat door for the basement and we have to Michael has to lock it because Otto decided to come down here and just scream in everyone's face. So he locks him out and then he pouts and then we sit and read but that's a normal night yep getting out Oh to calm down for an hour and then just lock in his ass out it's really sad off the laptop now he wants to be a part of you.

You like sees the screen and he's like, like a moth to a flame

you're touching that not him is true.

Hi buddy. Good boy. You

asked me a question.

Yeah, what's a scary story that like a scary thing that's happened to you in real life

scary thing that's happened to me in real life. This is gonna be edited right because I'll need a minute to think No

No. So you go live I don't know how to edit it will be added to Don't

worry scary thing to happen in real life like spooky. I mean the bruise thing with you in the friggin bread. Well, that happened to me. I know but I was witness I was you know there Yeah, I know right? Oh yeah, um, let's see something scary that's happened to me. Well, the only I mean this isn't really scary but it's creepy. That's your the dream my mom and I had Oh, that's a good one. That's pretty good one I still don't understand if anybody has any insight into what the fuck

of you psychics mediums out there.

Yeah, come Come one. Come on, because I'm an that too. So I don't know how old I was maybe like 14 or something like that. And I had this dream that my parents were watching our neighbor across the streets house, which they did do when they like wintered in Florida. Okay. So they're watching their house and I decided how big fancy house the house is empty. I'm gonna throw a party over

Oh, that is where did she go? That was me that she has also have another dream but like a little girl.

Listen to that per gentleman.

I don't know if it's gonna pick up I hope

so. Anyway. If not, you can Google just cat purring and it's basically what that sounds like. Except it's better because it's my cat anyway. Um, no, I yeah, I had this dream that there was this little girl with pigtails in the house. And I was like asleep in bed. Maybe it was a waking dream or one of those waking nightmares. I don't know. But she was by the side of my bed and she was telling me something and whatever it was wasn't like bad or malevolent or anything. It was like, okay, but

house. And there's some like weird like, did both those dreams take place in the same house? There's some weird that your guys your parents house must be some weird like gateway or like vortex or have could be could be spirituality yourself. Zak. Bagans might know what's going on. We should probably call him out. Yeah, because it's happens once coincidence happens twice. Once not so much happens thrice.

Burning down.

That is weird how you guys are sharing dreams. Your mind? Yeah, I

don't know how that works or why or what but

you're just vibing so hard just typing so all right. Almost done with the Legal Zoom. Sorry to cut you off. Looks like Jason is finally getting our LLC stuff done. Oh, good. He doesn't need me for that. Don't you need like, whatever. We'll figure that out later. Just sign lawyers.

I'll just sign the form. Yeah, right. It's fine.

It is. Usually, there's two other idiots here talking Well, I can take it.

Well, you know.

It is what it is. Yeah, that's a very weird dream. I don't have dreams that go like that, per

se. No, but you have really freaky fucking dreams. Especially when we lived in the townhouse. I don't remember. You'd always say there's some like which thing in the attic. That was like common in the room. I remember the one that would sit. Here's the thing about Michael. Here's the thing about Michael. He can't remember shit. He tells me things and then I'll be like, oh, yeah, remember this? No. It looks to me like I'm the crazy one.

I remember the one of the thing in the doorway. Yeah, that's about it.

Okay, well, you frequently said you had dreams as a witch and the witch thing in the loft or something?

Oh, she's in the loft.

What did I say loft or attic?

We didn't have an ad a panic. A panic. That makes it seem the

Toronto sell paddock. Loft when it makes sense. I

mean, if I was a spooky witch woman I'd hang on that love to have that was a nice little loft. Yeah, it was fine. Loft. So Laurie, Laurie. Laurie Allen? That's your name. Don't wear it out. Okay. You're a book girl. Much like a horse girl to horses. You're a book girl to books. It

was before hoes. Yeah. covers for hard lover. You

have to explain the pros before hoes. A joke because imagination is audio. It's not in text. So the way it's spelled

Oh pros is p r o s e as in the pros of the word that are written in the book. Gotcha. So, so that's exciting. What would

you say is your favorite genre?

horror. Horror. You're reading Stephen King Joe Hill. Auto agrees.

You've been kind of away from the horror books these last couple of times, though, haven't you? The last time we've read a bit more, I would say yeah, for natural than horror. I guess. I mean, the two can go hand. That's true. Stephen King does prove that. As soon as Mr. Hill

Well, I read the hell did I read? Oh the fuck? It was so good. I can't remember the name of it. Fuck the house across the lake or some some shit which was basically rear window all over again with a stupid ass twist at the end. It wasn't a horror. It was spooky rear window. It was like rear window that is okay. Is that another book? You know, rear window is? Wow. Is that a book? No. The movie by Alfred Hitchcock. Jimmy Stewart's in it. Jimmy Stewart Grace

Kelly. Jimmy Stewart. Yeah, the racecar driver?

No. I don't know. Anyway, it's from like the 60s and the sky is really you never heard when No, no. Some parents Jimmy Stewart is in a wheelchair. I don't know his legs are broke his legs don't work some shit. And

its misery are

often confused with James on movie misery. Now, that's whore. No, he's you know, legs are fucked up. And so he's like, bored in his apartment. So we started watching the neighbors through binoculars. And Hitchcock had built this huge asset that was like one piece where all the actors were in their little apartments quote unquote. Oh, oh yeah. And he's seen suspicious activity and Grace Kelly's his lady friend or some I don't even know who she is his nurse maybe I don't

foot. Sounds kind of like disturb you.

Yeah, yeah. Basically witches are based off of rear window I'm probably but yeah, it was it was similar to that. So that was disappointing. Not not huge into it, but I do like me a good horror film and horror book.

And we've been on horror film kicks for ever. I feel I was never surprised everybody I was a split split a little baby boy. Up until I got with Laurie. She turned me into the big titty golf boyfriend that you see

what I always wanted. So working on the tickets Yeah,

I'm getting there. It's mostly just filling out my tummy. Yeah. Oh, thank you for comes out live on the air. No, I never I hated like scary movies and scary games and Halloween. I was never a big Halloween guy. It was too scary for me. So embarrassing. And then I grew into it. But like, No, I was I was into it. You know, before we dated, but not as strong as it was. It was when we started dating that I enjoyed it a lot

the best so good. Can't remake it. No,

not at all. They try like all the Friday 30s And the nightmare and I'm so bad that Jason takes Manhattan is probably one of the worst best movies I've seen in my entire life. It is awful but you do get that guy it's so bad what was that bit whereas on the boat to get on the boat I forgot what made us laugh so hard so hard, dumbest shit I've ever seen like goes to get on the boat or whatever it is like the boats carrying

something just hit right and we just cracked up till we were crying. Whatever the hell that guy said

Friday. Yeah, that's bad. That was super poopy and then the one fuck Crispin Glover says hey, Ted, where's the corkscrew? Hey, you want to hang out with us to girls? Oh,

no. So those of you who haven't seen those films,

I think you don't watch them I think they won't Crispin Glover is the fourth and then Jason Take Manhattan I think is the fifth or

seventh or sixth it's trash it's such trash they all get really bad but you know it was really trash your leprechaun in Spain love her face was great leprechaun in space was ass. Sorry Warwick Davis. Love him. Love him. However,

what the flush of bad mood there is that bit where it's like the Space Princess. Oh, yeah,

she gets her tits out. Yeah,

of course. It's a it's a shame shitty 90s The bamboo gotta have kids yeah, their reason for her flash and tits. Yeah, lash and they're like oh, when the prints Space Princess flashes or titsa chip. That's a sign of death. Yeah. And wants you to die because you're not supposed to gaze upon the royal body

like well, she opened up

some things out in front of me. i This was non I didn't approve bad. Yeah, definitely.

That was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Yeah, really bad not even enjoyable. Like there's some bad movies that are corny and it's like yeah, okay, it's hokey whatever I still enjoyed it this was garbage Yeah,

it's it's hard for me because I love like the campy schlock even like shitty like I'm to a point I like leprechaun space a little bit just because of how stupid that concept

is. Jason Jason takes Manhattan was worse I think I

would disagree only because of how how stupid that one guy

it was movies it we're getting there on this some fucking class trip boat yacht right and the like.

And then they're planning through their clap and cheeks through Manhattan and

then all of a sudden no the boat crash and everyone's dead and quick get off the boat. Let's run teleporting around. Yeah, like what the fuck is very far we've come

Yeah, I don't think we watched all the Nightmare on Elm streets did we know stopped after the dream? Dream Warriors. With the weird Alright, the weird like emo girl. goth girl who's like I'm finally hot and she's got like, Oh, that was so stupid. She's got like four foot tall heels on with like 10 foot tall Mohawk hair. Yeah. So cool, but she's like I'm so hot and then she's beating the shit out of Freddy. It's she's just got like switch bleach snack. I'm gonna talk to you a friend to hey,

let's the dog Yeah, that was that was interesting not not the worst

it was No, I mean, I don't think the Friday movies are not bad.

I mean,

because they get they get more and more schlocky Yeah. Yeah.

Comedy is opinion in my opinion is always right with

no when they get bad is when you get to those like remakes they did have a mall and like the 2010s that was only the one well they also remade when they remade like Halloween they remade Frankenstein. Oh, like, Oh, yeah. Oh, those are garbage. They're all shit because they try to take them away too serious. I know. Like it's a fucking murderous zombie in a hockey mask was The Last Jedi just let it be funny. It's gonna be funny.

I don't Luna found a bottle cap on the floor. Nice. I mean, what was it Kevin Bacon in the first Friday? 13th Yeah, he gets murdered. It just gets like a spear like Right? Sex and a horror movie. You're dead. Gotta follow the rules. Why

I am a virgin. Oh, yeah, I should have told you. I'm sorry. Comfortable. Yeah, we'll have to have a talk later. Laurie, I have something for Oh, good. And I thought this would be funny because we've all done it. Spill that drink. I'm not gonna see it. Right next to the Lysol. Oh, good. Okay, so we're gonna take a which cryptid Are you test? Quiz introduction behold your government aside and cryptid your name? Laurie? Layer Larry's start the quiz, please. This is a new one. We haven't done this

Is there like multiple choice? Yes, there's

a lot of them. I'm gonna go over it with you. Oh, good. boba tea. No, something I've just baked. Whatever fast food I'm craving. Dark chocolate chips. Some granola or fruit? watermelon candy. Something sweet, like cookies. Something quick. I'm in a hurry. Or snacks. I'm on a diet.

Something sweet, I suppose like cookies.

Sure. Okay. Next. How are you spending your quarantine? Oh, well, that's that. Are you serious? Yeah, let's do podcast. Sleeping snacking. I'm constantly FaceTiming my friends. I miss being around people. Not to you. Yeah, I'm trying to keep up a journal. Journal journal. Yes. Baking, learning to knit doing yoga. I'm working on projects I didn't have time for before. I'm an essential worker frowny face. I'm enjoying my time alone. Or there's a quarantine. Bush. I mean, you aren't essential work.

want to describe?

You cannot pick multiples. You can only pick one okay? For the introverted broad

I am yeah, you want to go there? Why not? I mean, I don't I'm not making that half of what you said. So that's fine.

Gentle oil. Wild. Funny. Wanted. Fuck. Where do you want you're not hot. But I don't think the mic picked that. Damn. You can't just whisper into ASMR No, we have a noise gate. So it cancels out noise gate. Yeah, it cancels out like the black gates of

Mordor.

Multiple. Choose an article of clothing. A big sweater. Sunglasses, some Doc Martens Oh, comfy PJs. Whatever it is. It's black. Whatever it is black dress. A T shirt advertising for JFK strapped to the moon.org What the fuck kind of jeans sturdy denim do. Or rain, Kurt?

Wow. Let's go with comfy PJs.

You'd like to comfy PJs? Sure you ever tell you get home from work and you switch out of your work? clothes into?

Clothes are full of like blood and

stuff. Why do you like cryptids? And do you believe they're real? Yes, of course. They're real. I am one. I like cryptids because I'm gay.

I really say that. Oh yeah. That's amazing.

Move aside. I'm gay. I'm very gay. Leave But I think the paranormal

helped me out. I'm very good.

I like cryptids because I'm gay. That's funny.

That's great. What were the choices besides the I'm gay?

Of course they're real. I am one. I don't really believe but I think paranormal is super interesting. cryptids are real Bigfoot sold me weed behind the seven. I'm interested in the unexplained phenomenons that occur in our world. Things that lie just outside of human perception. I believe that there's a possibility of their existence to that one, or I'm not done. I'm not interested in cryptids and I don't believe in them. I'm not sure why I'm taking this quiz at all. Not

What shampoo? Do you use PERT?

The good shit. I care a lot about my appearance. So I go out of my way to get fancy shampoo. As long as it gets the job done. I really don't care. Something that smells good. I don't wash my hair or organic stuff. I'm trying to keep my carbon footprint small. I guess as long as it gets the job done or are that's more of a mirror. Smells good one. Yeah. Something that smells good. Yeah, that

one. Okay. Yeah, let's not get crazy and spend all of our money on fake and shampoo, man. Fake and

shampoo. Shampoo. What's your vibe? Fairy lights?

I wish these were just like, what's your very life? Yes, fairy like real fairy lights? Like the fake ones that you're on Amazon?

It says fairy life owned both the late night silence when everyone is asleep. pillow forts and connect connects. Oh, okay. I don't know if fairy lights but we'll go with the fake ones. Gentle rains and a cup of tea warm sweaters and sprouting plants. That does sound like you. That's nice.

There's a lot on this one. Why there's so many fucking because there's a lot of cryptids might God give them a chance

to Bigfoot or bust? Yeah. Dark Red Velvet thick and creeping fog noises calling out from the darkness choking fear and cold skin. You're a corpse. That's what that is. That's a dead body.

Up until the cold skin. I was gonna say that's BB

Polaroid pictures, faded old shirts, cigarette smoke and typewriter letters. So a hipster that's now driving down the hot she doesn't smoke cigarettes. I would give her most of that. But

I know overall I was saying that's a lie. Yeah,

that's a good vibe. That's that's a fun one though. Especially with that cool camera. She is. Yeah, no, that thing's awesome. Love that thing. driving down the highway with the windows down. sunglass sunglasses and candy stained tongues? No. laughing so hard and whites. Well, that's fun, but not the tongue of soft linen swaying on my clothesline. This warm sun on your face. The sound of wind chimes

hate wind chimes

freshly crystal not though. No. Oh, this is you freshly cracked glow sticks. whispers secret and secrets and radioactive waste. Oh, that's me trying to become Spider Man. I mean, who isn't? sunlight streaming through the forest the musical sound of running water there's a Brook babbling somewhere clean and cold air. Oh, late night takeout winning an argument hot coffee and sleepless nights cough cough or red lipstick glitter cilia stop your lungs in a pounding happy.

Do the sunlight in the forest. I like

Oh, really? You don't want to eat the plant when I well read it again. Whereas the way the gentle rains and a cup of tea warm sweaters and sprouting plants.

The other ones that okay, yeah, that's better. That's nice.

I just assumed from the guy who was with the 10 hours of rain noise that you put out all the time. That's

sure. I do well, to it. It's very soothing. Thunder peppered in you know,

some nice little white noise. Where do you want to spend the day? No, I don't. Oh, okay. We're okay. Hello. What do you want to spend the day? The arcade may that's a little childish, but my friends and I are having so much fun. In my room, I've got me I got me snacks. I mean Netflix. I don't need anything else. hiking in the woods. Life is so overwhelming. I just want to get

the cemetery 100% Okay, I've done that. Yeah, you've done that. I have on our honeymoon. Oh, graveyards on our honeymoon. Yeah,

you're right. Yeah, you know, you don't prefer sleeping off last night's hangover so I can go out again.

Oh, tempting, but graveyards, graveyards, it

doesn't say graveyards or cemeteries is a cemetery you know the difference between cemeteries and churchyards?

No graveyards are attached to churches cemeteries are stand alone, which really sounds like this should be flip flopped,

so our cemeteries like, because you know how old this thing is like, oh you know like, evil or something can't touch holy the holy land like a church or something. Or cemeteries considered holy land or no

POCUS it was I didn't see your church but the witches couldn't you know stand on the hollow ground that's what it around Yeah, ground Well, it's hollow ground. Yeah. What does that mean? It means it's hollowed.

Like, because people haven't dug holes in it.

Oh hallowed is h a l l o w not h o l l

o, o is hallowed. Like, like hallowed, hallowed be thy name. Yes. Basically, by Kingdom Come on. No,

look it up.

I will be done. Stick a fork in me Thy will be done. What do you think? What? What do you think death is an important part of life. It is in your best interest to find a way to be very tender like a steak. Heart. It is both reckless and necessary to make the choice to love. I feel like I'm lingering uncomfortably in the doorway of my own life. Oh my God. There is a future waiting and it's full of joy. You have to grow up and change the world that broke you think Mahatma Gandhi said that.

It sounds fun. But it's also asking me you know what do you think? What do I think? And I haven't had any home to go have you know something the the joy in life or whatever that one That one sounded

there's a future waiting and it's full of joy.

Yeah, that's nice. But homesick goes

What's your favorite? cryptid this won't affect your results. I'm just curious.

It won't affect my results. You personally are curious or the computer it's

asking but I am too. Got it? Do I just pick one? What's your favorite? Yeah, is there a list? No, no, it's just off the do I don't know. Um, although it doesn't feel what's your favorite? Like what cryptid Do you know of that? You like Oh, I

know. Moth mags. You talk about him all

others like like the Windigo is Ooh, just creatures that aren't real 100%

when to go and again when they go? That one is so good. What

have you got the one two? Which is I guess you could say cryptids technically tactically I mean depends on which depends on what you think that do witchcraft in and I think what your definition of a witch is like the cackling like green award. I'm sure

there's you know, several men and women alive that do that. By going Windigo Yeah, that's a good one. Yeah, cool.

Let's see what you are. You are you're a Fresno Nightcrawler WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? Oh, you don't know about them? Oh,

I didn't know any. I'll

show you a picture. They're super fun one of the lists. They're super good.

I wouldn't have picked that but so crawlers your girls are is different. No,

it's different. I'll show you they're funny but this is the description of while you're them. You're the quiet type and you probably refer to yourself as a small bean for soften tender is a way of life for you. I live near Fresno so you're close to my heart even though you look like walking pants together and when it when it rains outside you haven't got it so there's video hang on Fresno God like crawl what it say about raining outside what you like when it rains outside. I

do like arrange outside. I look like walking pants the Fresno nightcrawlers

do so Fantana Fresno nightcrawlers are a cryptid that are very popular obviously in the Fresno area. But they are not like they look like if you took like sweatpants all the way up and

perfect around like you know that is uncanny to my likeness. It's pretty fucking funny what I do remember seeing the stickers of them and ghoulish mortals? Yeah, like what the fuck is that? Yeah,

there's there's video of them like

they were the Hokey Cartoon. sticker versions of them that I saw though oh here Yeah. Jesus Christ Look at him go he shot WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? Literally somebody's wearing white sweatpants who is that? Oh my god it's just the guy that so there's there's footage of these things supposedly.

yep there's another video yeah we're gonna go there just casually

seriously if you need any sort of they just enlightenment on these fuckers google it because I'm I mean if I saw that coming at me in the in the night I would you know

I imagine they sound like he myself and run away when I was when I don't have any cash sounds like the stain from this tight commercial Oh,

that's great commercials

I think that's what's the President so I took a different test it wasn't this one. No Did you get I believe I got either it was either Bigfoot or the chupacabra.

Oh, yeah. Because easily recognizable ones. I got walking sweatpants.

I got a pair of joggers.

What the fuck? Hey, man,

you know what you're just gonna have to live with.

Yeah, so. So one thing that's interesting about Michael is, you know, we've been talking about all the spooky stuff. And our honeymoon was based mostly in graveyards in Salem, Massachusetts, and you know, witchy things and it's great. One thing that Michael will not do with me every fucking year even though I beg him to he won't go in a haunted house with me.

No, never. He will get 100 patrons. I'll do it.

Come on people. I've been trying to drag his ass into haunted house since we met and not once. Could I get him in there even after we were drunk at the bar. Above basement. The dad? He still wouldn't go in.

Nope. I got drunk at the bar. Fuck that, man. I'm not. I'm not a haunted house guy. I don't Hey, just

don't get it. I mean, there's a thrill is there it's part of the Halloween season. You know, we got to do the haunted house. We got to do pumpkin carving my you gotta watch the scary movies. My ideal. It's a whole season and you have to participate. You know?

My ideal like creepiness is like I'm not a big like. And before you say anything, let me finish the sentence. Fine. I'm not a big horror fan. I'm a monster fan. There's monsters in the haunted house. Yes, but that's different. Plenty. Yeah, but they're trying to deliberately scare me. I'm a Creature Feature boy. From behind the screen from behind the screen. Don't touch me. Pumpkinhead is the greatest punkin Creature Feature ever created. I will die on that Holly.

Fantastic. Fantastic. Fantastic movie.

No merch. None anywhere we go. There's no nothing. We went to this place called ghoulish mortal mortals and St. Charles. Shout out to ghoulish mortals. If you live in the Illinois area fucking go there that plays rock. It's amazing. Everything's scary all the time. Yes. And they have all this fun like, art and everything but nothing.

Nothing can hurt. No every other character you can imagine. Even I mean, they even had the prop of the stuff from the movie the stuff of all things. But no pumpkin had

the stuff from the movie. Yes, it's pretty Knapdale

they have the Hokey they had the walking sweatpants sticker.

The Fresnel Nightcrawler Yeah, no pothead. Are you there? Yeah, no, no pumpkin had nothing and no and everyone's like that. I'm not blaming ghoulish mortals, literally everywhere is like yeah, all we were we went to them. What was that place that you had to pumpkin? Head statue?

Yes. Okay, so there was a place in Salem. It's called count oarlocks Yeah, Nightmare gallery. Amazing. And it's one of the first things we did when we got there. And they have, I guess, wax figures. I

have white figures and props from the movie like they have all these horror

movies. So every character you can imagine is there and they had a giant Pumpkinhead but the thing is can't take pictures in there because all those marketplaces can take any goddamn pictures in there. You got to come in which is fine. But yeah, so they did have a giant ass Pumpkinhead but they had no Pumpkinhead merch no they even for nothing because you're like oh perfect I'll get a t shirt no

yeah and even like in the store when you go in the store they have like Chucky yeah merch and like everything else yeah like pinhead Yeah, merch, but no pumpkin nothing, which is a damn shame. Yes, and I I imagine it's because like Pumpkinhead after the first one the like the quality dropped just immediately from like a 10 to a four.

I mean, probably be seven but a lot of four so

yeah, but at least again with like, Friday the 13th we're talking about, like, even at their shittiest there's still qualities there that are funny. Yeah, we make fun of the Christian lover aspect of the one. It's a shit movie, but it's fun, hilarious and fun. Because of Crispin Glover. There's always something in every one that's at least we're no going back to fucking pumpkin had to we didn't even get past the first like 10 minutes. It was so bad.

Yeah, the group of kids like dig him up or whatever. And they're bullying some other kid and I don't like hanging them. Oh, yeah. Something terrible. Something. Yeah, the cat dies. It dies. I'm out. Any animals animals

die in your horn? I'm dying. I'm out of it done. The only good way to do it. And I've had this discussion before. If you're going to have an animal die in a movie, I don't care what level of like realism you're going for. Do what they did an anchorman reject black just punch like a fucking Beanie Baby. Off of the bridge. Do that. I don't care what. No, it's fake. If you're John Wick, and I'm seeing the fucking dog

Like the baby and American Sniper. Yeah, where

he's barely Cooper's overlay. Hey, is a baby's

baby emotional scene now Brad lanes. It's why he didn't win that Oscar.

Stupid fake baby. Oscar, he he punted that fake baby off. He really did. Yeah, I'm with you on that one. Make it super obviously fake looking. I don't want to.

I don't want my heart to hurt. Yeah,

I'm not in a scary movie. Like there's gonna be sad. There's that movie. I forget what it's called. But the people are trapped inside of a house starts with a see that the guys set up like booby traps in the house and they can't stay home. That's the one it's home alone. It basically is home alone though. But see ya can contain contagious contagious just contained.

Car contagion but then. But anyway, there's

a bit where they're like testing the traps or they're like trying to see where there's traps there's a cat in the house and it doesn't jump out the window and the window like cuts the cat and no. And it's like why would you know this to me? My house? If I knew this, you know? Look up what he's wearing. Like the second one starts with SQL. There is a sequel I think. I think it's this one where it's like a barn party and all those

I haven't seen that mean either. There's a cat that dies you know?

Why would I see that?

Absolutely not.

Yeah, I one last thing I want to talk to you about Laura. We are getting real serious. Will you marry me? Yeah, that's awesome. All right, you heard it here folks. No, there's a couple things I want to go over real quick. I usually do this at the end of the episode. Oh, okay. There are some reviews that we got. So first and foremost, I was gonna go out there and say this because we're getting to the end of the episode.

might or we're boring them to death. Yeah, already turned us off. Probably

they wouldn't blame them. Probably that when I am funny. When I am in accent peace when I am the main point. Uh huh. Off the window. Okay, I don't know how you married me. Well, but anyway, everyone. Link tree.com/deluded pod that has all of our links to everything on there. You can find all of our socials on there. We're at deluded pod or dont look under the internet. Everywhere. If you Google us, we're there. Googly googly. On our Spotify. We're at 270 reviews at the time of

hear from me, yeah.

Leave us a review on Spotify because once we have 300 special guests taken over the Twitter, yeah, I'll tell you who it is after me. It's you know, but we may I'm really excited for that. So give us a review. It means a lot to us pumped me to it, it really helps out a lot. If you wanna buy some merch, you can find our merch link in the link tree as well.

of your contact with me like I'm the one that I'm looking at you later.

So I'm going to start off with this one. This one I believe I don't remember if I read off before or not but it's from AFA it says it's fivestars says yes. Such an awesome podcast. mysteries are talked about so little and I love that there's finally a podcast about them. All the hosts are great and I have a lot of fun on Discord during live recordings. Ha not this time. Got your bitch

couldn't be a little bit more creatively named.

I appreciate you buddy. But I'm not going to read off all of them only because that doesn't seem fair to other people. But I do appreciate you helping the algorithm. And then I got another one here from Jay JD since since give it says with him. No nice. It says Angel oh geez, horror. Five stars stars. So I've noticed that Apple has some of the episodes in Spotify a 72 So how's them $50 Only fan tear butthole pictures COMM And also I caught them off man on my security camera. I would love to

Okay. There's been a lot of fun. Thank you for talking to me. Oh, pretty much as our nightly conversation anyway. Just pre

recorded at this time. Yes. And now you know, literally 1000s of people can hear you now. Good. Yes, we get about 15,000 listeners now a month so that's gonna be 15,000 people.

They should there should be more but yes, maybe I'll just get like you know, it'll double now. Like that Laura grace, she's alright. She's pretty old. Okay. And if

any of you need medical advice, don't come to me text us. I will ask my wife about it. And that will be legally given. Alrighty, everybody, have a nice night.