DLUTI 062 - Nyarlathotep

We recording like yeah, god dammit right it fucking was

32 minutes and 30 seconds or some shit

no it was like

2024 seconds or 42 That's what it was between

a certain gap and then I lost that talent. yeah welcome to Don't look under the where we

start off with some information you need a couple

talentless hacks podcast brought to you by us. Nobody's just

self deprecation the episode. That's

Jason

Hello,

that's Doug. And I'm Mike depressed.

I'm depressed mode.

I'm Johnny Bravo, sexual predator. I mean, he kind of was

a move away kind of a pervert. I mean, obviously like your dude was

nonstop horny. Like, there's gotta be a time where you're just like, This is too horny.

It's the friction for Johnny Brown.

Not for Johnny. He got his ass kicked a lot for being such a buff dude. I will say

rightly so.

Yeah, that shows pretty fucking trouble

full women did promote

powerful with his best friend but only because

there was a chauvinistic dude there.

The more I looked back at old Cartoon Network cartoon troubling like these are weird like fucking what's his face? That red devil from cow and chicken who has fat ass and Oh right. The devil. He's just the devil. I never watched a show. I just

fucking slept. I'm sorry. But like, I know how things are nowadays.

But oh fuck I woke TV. Get out of here.

What? We're not touching the word woke at all.

I still like I still like the old shows. Even if today they don't quite stand up like they're part of my childhood.

I think shows nowadays do stand up I think you just have to find them like not all shows back then. Were a bang. No. Like you're gonna sit there and tell me a gumball and a banger or chowder? That shit fuck

I think What are you saying is that even though cartoons back in the day were a bit troubling when it came to content in our childhood and we didn't know Yeah,

have you seen fucking like Ren and Stimpy ever dad never liked it

that should fucking rated ma now. It was why seven why okay, we'll

say bring back. So animation. Yep, I agree. That's fair. So Elodie?

Yeah? We actually had a really good bird scooter with that whole discussion.

Yeah. Oh, my God. What is happening?

We have to actually not scooter the bird.

We can't skate the character. Yeah,

we can't skate the bird. We have the ones that we said the bird scooter. We

have to clean the house.

Hi, I do this to you. We have three new patrons. We want to shout out this week. You guys got us over our goal of 50

Yeah, we have so much to talk about.

The audience quick. The audience they're making, like low grumbling noises. I hear them. You really need

to help us out. I

really need to prep us they kind

of sounds like a goat moaning sexually does it sound

like this redacted? Because that's probably what it's gonna sound like.

But it's close enough. So our three new patrons for the week here is Geist. hos up daddy.

Fantastic Browning song.

Yeah, that's very true. We have Shirou for not to be confused with Shiro five five. Yes. You stole my dumb joke. Thanks. And Ted mon Lee hit mon Lee's older retired uncle. Hey a cat stone here.

There is a cat

my guy I thought that came in like DK I

forgot he was here. I'm gonna have to get rid of you in a minute here. Unless you're gonna be a good boy. We'll see if he mails again I'll kick him out. But yeah, thank you guys to Shiro for and Ted mon Lee you guys fucking rock. You helped get us over our goal of 50 HD pay. Thanks you guys. We're buying a Gosh dang dark box web box.

It's been a fucking minute but a while ago I did set a stretch goal on Patreon for

a cat rubbing.

Guy for sure asshole

is touching.

But no on Patreon is a stretch goal of 50 patrons and when we hit that goal, we promised we would go ahead and purchase a dark web mystery box. And now we have to do So

look into his rusty shares.

This is very distracting.

It's like, Oh, I'll put them upstairs.

To be fair, the castle is more attractive than either of keep going. I'll

be right back.

But yeah, so we are now going to go through the steps of purchasing and acquiring said darkweb mystery box. When we do, we are going to be opening it in a location that is probably not one of our homes because everything that I've seen about these things are fucking disgusting.

Big, big disclaimer, don't do this. Do

not do this. We are lucky enough to have an ally into this part of the Internet where we ourselves don't actually have to deal with it. Fucking God.

No guy that knows a guy that knows. Yeah, another guy. Don't ask

us for his information or contact. Nope, none of that is going to happen. But just know that we are going to be receiving a dark web and mystery box in I honestly, I don't know how fucking long they would take to get to wherever they're going.

I don't know. It'll be well, we

have to we have steps we have to set up a Pio box. Yes, I'm not sending that shit to my home address.

I think dude said he has a place for us. If I remember correctly, I got to talk to him. But okay, that being said, basically what will happen is once we choose a box, he'll get it for us and then

okay, so essentially, we just have to talk to the guy. Yeah, okay, well, shit, that's easy then. So I'm guessing

about a week or two, Max, maybe more. I don't actually know. Don't quote me on any of that.

Okay, well, either way, we are going to put things in motion to get this we're going to see how it goes. If we get scammed, and they just take our money and give us no box. Fuck, that sucks. And I'm sorry, guys, but I don't think this is going to be like all

Patreon tears. Yeah.

So if you see charges for more than you used to now we are just kidding.

Are you guys naked all of a sudden? Well,

you didn't have to say it out loud.

The nice thing about audio mediums, Mike is that they don't have to know why are you doing that to Doug? Because it sounds good to me. Already said

he put his fingers in someone's dick and how am I going to pass that up?

You? You're just supposed to stretch that that big.

My patients at the hospital might say otherwise.

That's one shitty and bloody okay. Yes. Let's

move past all of that. But yes, Mike now that you're back we just got done telling everybody that couple of weeks probably maybe with the the dark web bucks. We're not sure. Because we don't know how it works. We got to talk to Doug's guy about it. Doug knows the guy know yet. Doug's got all the connects. Founded? Yeah. Well, we'll keep you guys updated on that. In the meantime, though, what the fuck are we doing today?

Well, I thought it had been too long since we had tried you know summoning an old one into the basement.

Unfortunately we got an outer God but

unfortunately couldn't get Louis here. Damn, it's an old one joke low if you're listening your old undefined graphics mic lowly everyone go follow him. Get art from him.

Yeah, please do that. Shameless plug. But ya know, we are going to do one of Jason's This is probably my favorite

aside from as a thought but I feel like as a thought is just cheating because as a thought is everything Yeah, he's

pretty cool.

I didn't enjoy that guy. Yeah, outside outside of that doobie. This one is my absolute fucking favorite in the entire Cthulhu mythos and he goes by a very easy to pronounce name just like all of the Cthulhu Mythos but his name is near Lhasa tab.

I think I'm gonna just refer to him as my Arlo are gnarly. Yeah, no, no Nurgle the former narla

Sure. As as

is Mike stay with us ready 123

Now or Alexa chip?

That was actually pretty fun.

If you're learning if I pair it someone I get it right if it's just me trying to say near normal neural Nora Aletheia tough I can't do I need someone I

are laugh Oh tip Nora. One No. Nine Nine our high our last night our last attempt Naira last Hotep Naira, loathe the 10 Mummy. We'll get to that. Oh, yeah. Yeah, as is as it is again.

Is he a mummy

as well a different thing. Okay, yes, he

is. Is he? Yes. Is he

right dogs right.

Everything you say the answer will be yes.

It's your chicken. Yeah. Could be okay. Problem, as is tradition with Cthulhu corner dejection.

Michael likes these weeks because he has never

done Jack all and it was a good song.

He also doesn't have to pronounce things like near left tap.

I just got to sit back in my new reclining chair like Listen to this. If you guys can hear this at home, listen to this. That's me recline all the way back.

I just watched the fear in the face as he fell backwards trying to

point Yeah, but I did it for the bit.

But the fun fact is Mike we're gonna start quizzing your ass on this. Folks. I

stopped up who are you?

Yeah, it's Maker's Mark. Anyway, here's Mark, Maker's Mark and Evan Williams. Are you?

Are you a shilling

Devon Willie. Hey, hey, Mike.

This isn't stalling or anything because that's not coming until like later.

Okay, so I'm not getting quizzed immediately. You

need to listen. And we're not going to make it super hard. Now, obviously, but we're going to ask you some things after maybe like two to three,

like two or three days. Yeah. So at the end of this episode might be a good example. Okay. Yeah. But then you're safe the next like two to three.

All right. Well, let me tell me about this. Nora left the topic. So

nevertheless, it's up. I got it right is known to many by his epithet, the crawling chaos which actually also shares a short story of Lovecraft but the funny thing is, he actually doesn't fucking appear in it. But his most well known title is the crawling cage.

Pastures was as well he never really appeared or no that was as a thought he never appeared

as a thought and literally is is mentioned like three times and that's it. Everything that's known about him has kind of been supposed or created around him but yeah, this is so you know that that's happened as a Thoth are very very very close in multiple fucking ways. And we'll talk

that? Yeah, I will. So there's a lot of ways that he actually differs from a lot of the deities that we talk about, just in general here. So basically, the way he differs from the other deities in the mythos is that most of the outer gods are exiled to the stars. So you've got Yaga Thoth you've got as a Thoth will definitely do a Yaga Thoth episode it's fucking awesome He's amazing. And most of the great old ones are like either like sleeping or like in a dreamlike state so

what do you what do you mean by exiled to the stars like I get that they're nice

the planet can they make him come near the the Milky Way galaxy is

there a reason why that we just get into later on there

if you remember from our timeline book and timeline episode

you know the Caribbean cube that we talked about that like started the beginning of the universe a little

bit and that here on earth correct oppose events,

there's two forces fighting for power on earth and then most of the other like like outer gods are kind of like sitting back watching it happen.

It's like the thick of it if we want to put it in Magic the Gathering terms think of the gametype Emperor you know the one I keep talking about the three V three with the Emperor's lieutenants and shit. Think of the outer gods as the Emperor like you can't get to them until you've dealt with the rest Gotcha. That's kind of what the outer gods are like they they sit back they plan shit and then they put it in motion but they don't fucking lift a finger

so is it not as much as they can't come to Earth? It's just they have no reason they won't they're just they won't there they don't have a reason to call depends on

who because some literally cannot and they need an like an outside conduit to help get them there which we will be covering today in this episode because Meireles that happens to be one of those conduits but

okay, yeah, he's actually a very prevalent conduit that actually you know, well we'll just we'll just get it Yeah. So like I said he so Nyarlathotep he's not like he frequently actually is walking the earth and the guise of a human being is very different from what we're used to saying you have go through this big great beast sleeping in the ocean changes his size but doesn't change his

the migos by the way, I'm pretty sure they're breaking up. I think it's offset on follow. Take off and literally

my brain hurts. All right. So damn it, Mike.

So usually an eye or a little looks like a tall, slim, joyous man. But he has 1000 Other forms and manifestations and many are reputed to be quite horrific. Like, and sanity blasting is the quote that was used Yes. Which makes sense completely. So most of the outer gods have their own called serving them Nyarlathotep he seems to serve as he served several colts actually. And he takes care of their affairs and you know, the outer Gods absence going to them not being the Hand of the King.

Honestly, yes, that's a fan fucking tastic way of putting us literally

Yeah, so most outer Gods use strange alien languages while he uses human languages and can easily pass for a human being if he chooses to do so. So finally, most of them are all power yet evidently without a clear purpose or agenda, that he seems to be deliberately deceptive and manipulative. And he uses propaganda to achieve his goals fucking

just like Disney. Am I right?

Hey, Derek. There's a theory that the CEO of Disney is in fact an avatar of narla

Are you serious? That's a fucking thing. Yes. Oh. That would explain how they can push out so much content definitely

a fan fiction theory but it's it is at the craft so it's

a Lovecraftian if we had tea, it's probably

I don't

know if it Mickey Mouse's mere lucky house. I feel Yeah.

Okay, so in this regard, he's probably the most human like among the outer gods. He enacts the will of them, or so to say, and he is their messenger heart and soul. So the immortal figure of the deputy or the messenger of hidden and terrible powers, there's these quotes are just outlandish. I love them. They're fantastic. So he is also the servant of as the Thoth who's fitful spastic wishes he basically has to fulfill immediately. Yep. That's pause Yes.

Mike, do you know why Nyarlathotep has to blindly Phil as a thoughts wishes,

I'm assuming because everything is in has the thoughts and dreams and if he doesn't, then has the thought would be like with the vote?

Yeah, I think that's about right. Good job. Like. Let's get some positive reinforcement. And then like, I do have I have a negative one? Especially if you fuck it up. So yeah, like question, one clear, good

guy like your your Pavlov's dog here.

Yes. You're getting the Pavlovian treatment.

All right. So moving forward. Unlike the outer gods, spreading madness is more important and enjoyable than death and destruction to Nihilo data. So some suggests that he will be the one that destroys the human race and possibly the earth as well moving forward in time. Great, great stuff.

Can you say that about all of them? Essentially?

No, actually,

no, no, not everyone's there. Like kung fu is not there to destroy the earth. He can't he wants to.

He wants to so fucking bad when he cannot. Oh, as of the same thing, he literally cannot because if he does, that means he's woken up and nothing exists anymore. Like there's these these deities sound so fucking powerful on paper, but then you find these things that just prevent them. They're Paper Tigers. Exactly. That's exactly what they fucking

are. glass cannon. Yeah. glass cannons. Yeah. Okay, so um, so that being said, Well, he destroyed the earth. Like, what, what actually is his role in the mythos? Jason.

So, as Doug said, near the top is the messenger heart and soul of the outer gods. Now, if you remember from the timeline, we kind of outlined the different classes of deities and the Cthulhu Mythos, outer Gods being the most alien, but by far the most powerful and so nihilist of himself is an outright God, which means he's imbued with this massive amount of power. What he chooses to do with that power is actually really funny to me. And it's to

It's not actually I actually, I can show you a time like a family tree. Yeah. But I'm gonna go over in a little bit. Yeah.

Literally, like so all all he exists for is to basically take the wishes of as a Thoth and make sure they happen. He's sometimes if it lines up with his own like little agenda. He'll help out some other outer Gods maybe even some, some great old ones, although he's not the biggest fan of the great old ones. Yeah, very good fucking reason. But again,

which is funny because like, like you were saying with his rank, literally, there's only three other deities that rank above them. Yeah, well, actually two of them are on the same level and one is higher, which is as a thought,

and that's the only reason being is because he's technically outside. Reality if as thought were inside reality and the left the top would be right on par with pretty much everybody else

and spoiler. It's his dad.

Yeah. Hey, speaking of, let's do literally his only role is to is like think of the dude from 300 that came over to say like, the God is there sees no the Messenger of the God Oh, and they kicked them into the fucking pit. Yes, that's near and Xerxes would be as I thought, oh shit. That's kind of his whole role it's to make sure everyone gets the he okay to put

if you're not going to finish it, you know,

that's the thing by that flavor aid,

go to the compound.

So let's move into his Lenny address. So that being said as a Thoth as his father, fascia, larger, those two other beings that are on his level, like I mentioned, is the nameless myth, a mist and the darkness. Yep. And besides that, the coolest nicknames are not gonna go into who they are, but I am going to touch on the lineage a little bit. So the nameless mist their offspring is Yaga Thoth, which is now NIHR

So you have this like, she's like the mother of all of these deities. Yeah.

It's funny though, because a lot of them don't have like a mother per se. They kind of just spawn gets like

Zeus where, like Athena like he removes his rib and like there's Athena Yeah, exactly. That's pretty much as I thought those cheeses Yeah, were removed his rib and a rabbit Berry.

No, the fucking Adam and Eve that dad took Adam's rib and made Eve

god yeah, the guy Oh god.

Oh man, I if we were talking about as a Thoth right now I just found out some fucking information but I will delay that.

So So yeah, now we know his, his siblings and his nephew. And then we have what doesn't have a whole lot of information surrounding them, but they're called the million favorite ones. And these are Naira with the dubs children are so cool sound I know. Just wait until I start reading this other shit.

It's not like a Thugga in the fire vampires.

So the million favorite ones are are not technically his children, but they are. So these are the millions of cult followers that Nyarlathotep has on his own. Which he kind of doesn't give a shit about not even close. They are just there purely to just cause chaos on the world.

Well, you you both saw this when you guys played the very small amount of masks of near. Yeah, I

didn't play that. Yeah, you did. Yes. You did. I shot you. Yeah. Oh, that's that's cool. Played

the entire Peru portion.

I thought that was like to Call of Cthulhu.

The campaign is famously known as masks of near nothing. Yeah,

gotcha. Gotcha. Gotcha. Okay, so we have shoot me this. Yeah, you guys actually

also ran into either six or seven versions of neuroethics up in that at all? Hell yeah.

Was it Fisher boat guy that I'm not

gonna say shit because I still fully plan on picking that back up.

Let's do it. Alright, so inside of this call, there are four specific people who I thought were just super badass and deserve a shout out. And these are called The Four Horsemen of Nyarlathotep. So badass, super cool. And these guys actually spawned from a comic, so they're not classic Lovecraftian but by golly, they are fucking dope and their backstories are so right. Cool comic. Do you know it? It's called the fall of Guthrie? Lou,

I am gonna have to pick this.

Yep, we are.

Trust me. I've been trying to find it on eBay. And it is not easy. So well.

You guys have a fucking line on the fall of Cthulhu comics. We want all

there's an Omni Bus that you can download. But I hate fucking downloading comics. I'd rather own this one. But regardless, moving forward, so the Four Horsemen you've got specifics? Not Sisyphus, not the

Hey, it's all back to episode one.

Yeah, right. The scourge of Atlantis. So we have specifics. The masked mute of Kiss the father of pestilence and the champion of damnation. So this is just like weird. The idea of Damn

nasia titles that Lovecraft comes up with are the fucking best WWE champion on top nation.

So then we have it Gotta be cool.

I knew that was coming.

All I'm hearing is Grant grant and anyways, so the next one is girl nuk of Volk Nast.

Go and repeat that back to her knuckles cos

Yeah, you're pretty close. You practice Russian. And they're known as the devour of the Royal corpse of foolin. It works. Yeah, this thing is a disembodied essence and an empty box. And whoever opens it will be possessed by the essence and transformed into a corpse eating monster.

Zombies. Yeah,

it's really weird. Very just bizarre all around. Then you have the mask mute, known as the sister of the loss of this. And she manifests herself as a young girl covered in endless masks, which express her current emotions. And it is said that her true face could kill even the greatest beings in the dream lands.

If I remember correctly, we can't cut we cannot touch on the dream lines.

The Dream lands he is this weird realm between when you're asleep and dying like purgatory? Kind of DMT that's where you go. That's Dreamlands

there's a there's a lot of I

have done that. You're absolutely right. My unknown to

addiction. Yeah. The labs on the other side of the wall.

Yeah. And then we have gifts. I don't want to I'm sorry. These are his This is a four of the Four Horsemen and they're related. They're just they're tough how again, they're his children. They're his children. Okay, part

quote, hard quote, unquote.

And then we get known as the father of pestilence. It is an irrational force found in the mountain of coon dial. That's definitely pronounced wrong. Also in the dream lands and under certain rights, which include vomiting one's own soul and wearing a jackals head as well as undergoing brain surgery and bonding using the color out of space. It can possess a human

and to move in a hole

well now the Colorado space is an entity but it's Yes.

Its appearance is that of a mummy from which purple and blue fire appears where the eyes and mouth should be to sound familiar? You guessed it

looks like a big reveal

Oh yeah, we did we ever describe his most like no prevalent form or even his fucking like some of those names? No,

let me let me finish this. I have two more people to talk about. We got we got naira. Naira Lewis, son ooga. Knock.

You did that. You made that. The sound on last week's episode. Yeah, I

don't know how to pronounce two A's and a CH. But so his son nihilist he likes to just like procreate. Sometimes he do be fucking now he fucks but he has a reason to Fox Fox. He will fuck some poor soul. Spit a baby into them. The baby will come out and look. Just god awful. tentacle for a head almost looks like a tongue. Sounds like babies in general. My

right. Right there. Right there. Come on.

You know me? No children. But yeah, he so these these things. They just look awful. And to be honest, we actually don't know a whole lot about his sons or daughters. But we do know that they're a gate. Yep. Well, we don't know what that gate is for. And that's where the theory of the ending of the earth and the people I will go over that a little bit. Okay, cool. Yeah. So, and then a lesser known daughter that he has is actually Lilith. Oh my God. God Lilith like the biblical Lilith Lilith?

I don't know. I've never heard the Bible. What do you mean? Who the fuck is Lilith? Lilith is

like the mother of

basically like, it's fucking I looked this up.

No, we're not doing an episode on Lilith. Just know that if you know who she is, you know. So Lilith. His daughter ends up with one of the other outer Gods NOTAMs. And they do their whole thing which I'm not going to get into that stuff.

That's another all the names

for everything you just said could be modern, like death metal band names, and I would not second guess.

One of these days we'll cover the kazoo metal bands. Like bow down

in this one actually.

Yes, hell yeah. Not

a whole lot of them actually. I'm actually very none of them except me. I don't cover anything. Let me I'm just we'll just go over it now. Alright, but yeah, so names, forms. You name it.

We actually something I meant to touch on earlier. So the most well known form that you They're left that's up takes is also it also holds the name, the God of the bloody tongue again, this is also well you guys did not run into this you guys ran into the beginnings of this in kala Cthulhu you definitely met a few of their cultists though. One of the things about the cultists of the bloody tongue that anyone would

is one of them in egg. Probably, you know, because I'm just saying 1000 Sounds like a lot, but I can list all the 1000 things that you probably isn't as the a lamp that'd be pretty stupid.

Yes, actually,

that's really stupid. That's

one of them. That that's really dumb to turn into. You need 1000 Man you start to run out of cool shit like 50

I already chose giant ape. What else is there? Alright, right. I'm gonna head length of wood.

But yeah, he's I mean, he's got a ton of different names. There's human wooden

planking started is because he came back as a plank of wood.

I will say he cheats because a lot of his 1000 masks are just human names that he has famously like, imitated I was

thinking they're gonna be like Reese skins where he's like,

oh, there is literally there's like four titles that contain the words God bloody and tongue in them. Just with different ad shooters.

You hear me? neuroethics up.

You're a cheater, Dini,

Harry Houdini is an avatar, technically. Oh, no, we don't we don't know if he is but he met he he met and got kind of trapped by Niala thins out in the story. It was a fucking failure. That's the story. Had you guys read before we played? Yeah, but she, she definitely definitely

100% It wasn't even a read. It was like three YouTube videos.

And it was literally like, it was like two and a half pages total. But okay, before I go over his forms, let's actually go over, like his, like where he came from, like where Lovecraft came up with this idea, because, as far as we know, it's a it's a creation of Lovecraft minds. We can't prove or disprove if he is or is not real. And Lovecraft did a very good job of making sure of that.

basically, could didn't come up post humus or something as well. Yeah.

Yeah, it came up posthumously. Um, but Lovecraft describes his creation of Neolithic dub as well, he, so he had a dream about him. And he describes the dream he had as, quote, unquote, the most realistic and horrible nightmare I've experienced since the age of 10.

And I can't describe it. No, no,

indescribable, and that was kind of the basis for everything. Now, in the mythos, his origin story is obviously a little bit more sinister and detailed.

He's more played up like a villain villain. Oh, yes.

To put this into perspective, just a little bit. He is like, damn near the antagonist, and everything that has to do with Call of Cthulhu nowadays, and history. Yeah, like there are arguments that Nyarlathotep like was like influencing Hitler there. Oh, Stalin, and like every every terrible, horrible fucking thing that's happened on earth. You could basically make the argument that night off the top was sowing madness to help that happen, basically, puppet mastering in the background.

And this one your mommy thing?

We all know mommy's, yes. Yeah, overall, I have to yell it every time. It's yeah. So in this

one, he gains the title of the black Pharaoh. And he basically comes to Egypt. And he, he sews like images of destruction in people's minds just to kind of like draw them in, and he creates a crowd. And from that crowd, he produces all of these like, weird alchemical scientific experiments that are that are just like mind blowing. And from this crowd, he usually draws like a solid third to half of them to basically follow them. And then he goes to the

so he's, he's the first like, like, like,

he's the pied piper.

Yeah, okay. Yeah, he's

sure he's the pied piper but for people

I was gonna go ringleader I was gonna go more like Ponzi scheme like combs whatever your

his followers don't make any money. So yeah, come sit

down shows you the miracle. Scrub a dub, and then leaves and then the one guy on the town follows him like that Scrub a dub dude know how to clean wine out of my white t shirt and do be clean if you go to the next town and they do the same thing and he is the guy from that town.

So um, yeah, that's essentially so it's very appropriate for this to be his entrance into the Cthulhu Mythos as just this Egyptian does black Pharaoh that's garnering an audience and like gathering his his army, I guess. And this is actually a super fucking short story, but this is literally it's like a page maybe. So after that, we move ahead to another story called The Dream quest of unknown Kadath he again appears

are describe the horror that Why are you here? Because

it's indescribable. So yeah, after the dream quest of unknown Qaddafi, we go ahead to 1936 where, if such a good year especially for the story, the hunter the dark. This is where he changes and this is a God always back to masks. This is where he actually appears as a tentacle bat monster, living in living inside the steeple of the Church of the starry wisdom. Like one of their churches, and that's His manifestation of near left that is this fucking tentacle bat.

Yeah, pretty frightening.

In the story of the rats in the walls, he's mentioned as a faceless God in the caverns of the earth center. Like he started off as just this very sinister looking Egyptian pharaoh that seemingly came back from the dead to try and like raise an army more or less. And now he's a faceless God that lives in the Earth's mantle. Like what a promotion and it just gets weirder and weirder

That one. I had written down so

I did not know that another one of his Another one was formed as the high priest not to be described sounds kind of like Voldemort if

I'm being honest will not be described do not

describe me please

let me get back to the black Pharaoh once again and the very last one I wanted to mention was a bloated woman. The reason I wanted to mention that is it's it's from directly from like Chinese,

Esther. suffixes form looks like

so we're gonna yes, that might be the name of it. Most people describe it as the bloated woman or the dark woman or just like or the woman but this is an important one because you can also see this entity with a different name. Slightly different description, but you could absolutely find this in Chinese culture and history. Yep, there she is.

Looks like from Constantine city of demons. So

I thought we were going on the same path. I thought you're gonna say don't be scary stories to tell them the dark. Oh,

that creepy thing in the hospital. Yeah, honestly, there's it could be a very loose argument to be made there. But so all of this shit comes from literally for fucking stories and to sonnets. He was only written about in Lovecrafts work six times and no detail was ever fucking given about him. Everything that we know about you know, left that's up mostly comes from the writings of

there's a French wiki that apparently like apparently in France like this is like the rage really? Yeah, cuz I was like a bunch of the like, there's a bunch of deities and older outer gods and other ones like that. They have literal like French to English translations on their Wiki pages that are like really hard to like, read through because they're translated really poorly. Yeah, and you can only find the descriptions on this like French like website Hmm. Which I thought was really

No, no, not at all. Um but yeah, you can the majority of what you're going to learn about him come from like the more modern writers and a lot of shit and pop culture before we talk about the fun stuff. The one last thing I wanted to touch on is we've mentioned a couple of things about his destiny like his he's, he's prophesied to basically destroy the earth. And honestly, I am so fucking really agree with that because let's

Yeah. Like killing he like he doesn't really care to kill you. He wants you to go fucking insane Yep, he wants you to be at the

brink and doing yourself yeah, that's that's essentially what it is because the end of the line for him because remember, he's he's he's like a substitute as like cult have as a thought leader more or less as a thought can't he's there to do it there. So the majority of the time the cultists that are involved with him know that the end of the line for them is a horrible horrible death.

Yeah, if if they're if as a thought cult members meet him they assume they're gonna die pretty quickly.

Yep. And horribly and but the fucked up thing is they want that.

So prefer that whenever almost Yes, just

watch the fucking prison episode of death clock and or Metalocalypse and you got it. Another gold aside from whatever he wants is to help the other our gods with their goals. Especially because so one of the things I found very interesting about this is anytime he operates on Earth, we can kind of assume that he's trying to fulfill the wishes of another deity Right? Or he's bored one of the

literally like the only two options,

right? He so he's making moves that won't come to fruition for like 1000s of years right? There is no possible way that we as humans could a understand why he's making the choices he's making, what end he's making, to what end he's making the choices. And like what's going to fucking come of it, there's no possible way we can predict any of that. So, with those out of the way, the big fucking reason that near law exists is very simply to summon the outer gods to Earth. That is

And you know, you know how they think he's gonna do it. His children, his chitlins his children's, he's gonna fuck you.

He's gonna fuck you.

You're gonna spit out a baby and probably died during the process. Yeah, but the biggest thing that I didn't mention because I knew you probably talked about this is how he's having a lot of trouble doing this. Basically the bitch of the gods since he it takes him so long to get around to doing anything because he's always you know, basically slaving away for someone else. He's, you know, that's why he's going and fucking these people and trying to make his children

because all of you wonderful investigators while playing Call of Cthulhu managed to keep that at bay. Yeah,

if you see giant tongues starfish thing, man, walking down the hallway,

put your head between your legs and try to suck your own dick because you're about to get fired.

Yeah, or you shoot it with a shot. So

I don't know if that's gonna be very effective, though.

But yeah, it's it's a fun time. Yeah, it's a good time. Everything's fine.

He's so much fun that like he literally just fucks with people he comes to earth he so we didn't mention this either. Here. This is his MO. He basically shows up in a either a human form or humanoid form in the case of like the black Pharaoh. And

it's funny because I'm pretty sure it didn't, didn't come through Lu and cassava, were they the first ones honor saga was

the first one here who was and then because the Luke came or no, it was Thugga. That was the elder things and they fought the fire vampires with the elder things. And then kung fu Yeah, just leveled like a whole fucking nation.

So as far as outer Gods go, and elder ones you've got Carthago Cthulhu showing up on Earth, and then Nyarlathotep gone.

No,

that looks kind of fun. We'll go to other folk with everyone. Yeah, except he didn't really have a choice as I thought that was like yo get the fuck down there like shits going down because we need that cube

as a Thoth and go through a cube. Yep. So there's there's like the

demon child like

or if you're looking at the Tarot version? He's the high priest. Yeah. Because he technically is a hybrid the whole fucking pantheon. Yeah, that's that's it for the his whole destiny and whatnot.

Um, and then we'll kind of end this off. I'm just like a fun pop culture kind of like reference list are so many. Seriously, I'm gonna blow through these but like there's a ton of fun thing. So in comic books, you've got the fall of Cthulhu, which I mentioned earlier. You've got the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen comic you've got lovely Lovecraft he is the he is an emissary sent from UGA to negotiate a truce with whoever Prospero of the blazing world is. I have never read it, which is

fun fact. The current resting place of near the top is thought to be on youngest.

Yeah, yes. What's the youngest planet? It's

full of terrible horrible things. Awesome.

Imagine whatever his asshole looks like and that's probably what you got. And then my favorite thing on this comic book list is the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Were Loki summons him and basically in the comic he's referred to as terror of souls Ripper of flesh. I don't know Tim and T got like this.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Do the old DMT comics and like that shit. God,

I don't actually have a reference to which comic it is. So like, either way that that blew my mind was

it's like a comic Noir. Like Batman, the old Ninja Turtles. Okay. Yeah.

So as far as film goes, there is a 113 minute short film that you can find on DVD and it's probably just super as so I'm going to just blow through that. What's it called? So you can find them in traditional like board games. Pathfinder monopoly Yugi Oh, hey, there's a card in yugioh he's called the outer God and Iarla like it's a dope ass card look

it up if he's either monopoly man is he Mr. Peanut?

Yeah, sure thing you guess man is a possible yes.

If you're gonna ask it just assume I'm gonna say yes.

Or is he you? Yes, fuck this podcast with an older guy.

That's that's actually that's actually working in your favor.

Want to fuck with me man? As far as video games go this list is huge

I'll be the final boss and yeah, so

he's in Call of Duty Zombies known as the Shadow Man. You'll see him in there. You've got which regalia last for you go forward and Call

of Duty Shadow Man that's actually from the form he takes is the hunter in the dark.

Okay, cool. Good to know actually. Yep. Yeah, so you've got realia last dust free space to persona salmon Max 100. Salmon Max. Yeah, his name is his name and epitaph of the crawling chaos as mentioned, and Ice Station Santo, whatever that means. I never played salmon back so I could not tell you what that means. And literature we just went through pretty much all listen. He's in a few light novels, which I'm not going to get into either. If you want to read Lovecraft read Lovecraft.

song about your left

band called Burning StarCore with a self entitled song of Nyarlathotep Conan The British death metal band created a song called fo hammer which depicts him not fused with the Belgian metal core band called Congress did one. You've got a place called or a band called flint glass, experimental electronic music that does they're all basically called 911.

The biggest one I know of I think it was God. You got it? Well, no, you me too. I think I'm almost positive. They're They're American based. Right? Are they?

I assume so.

I think so. Because I see shit from him all the time on Facebook and stuff. We might be talking about different ones but go ahead. The one I'm talking about is called bow down is it

it's not on this list. But okay.

bounds a death metal band and all every one of their songs has to do with either a different deity elder one like or a being in the mythos. They're super good.

I thought you were gonna go into how Metallica has a song called the thing that should not be Yep. And it contains the lyric crawling chaos. underground coal has Solman twisted sound.

It's cool. It's a very loose reference and I don't know if they actually

it sounds great, but who knows if that's like an actual reference. But yeah, there's a bunch of other bands. There's an anime

Yeah. Basically, they

announced that

they embody they basically take all of the Cthulhu Mythos deities and turn them into cute girls

kind of like that high school of the gods are

dead

no there's no high school gods were like these high schoolers get like in viewed with the body of a bunch of like of older gods like one of them gets the the abilities of like for the little kids like Jesus and other one gets like yeah, it's very weird but apparently Jesus I just remember water is

already get nailed to a cross

your body line

yeah we joke but Jesus is the most deadly of them all.

favorite thing to do in d&d is just fucking put water in people's long Yep, shape water. Anyways, that's all I'm gonna go over. As far as pop culture goes. There's so much other stuff that he is and he's like that. Like I said, he's like the main villain and like half

of the supernatural ever referenced, I'm sure.

I don't believe they did too much with like, the cathedral mythos, very surprised, stayed very cryptid as far as what they talked about

very surprising, especially like season six when he's gotten to Leviathan territory. Well,

that was actually just gonna mention that they do have the darkness as a character. Yeah. Which is technically either near La that's up or his son. Well, his sister, their sister. That's right.

So they kind of do that they

do have the leviathans, which I don't really know do leviathans technically count as a?

Well, they're in the Bible. So it's like, no, they're

absolutely loved. Their biblical more angels are too though. Those are absolutely Lovecraftian as well. Yeah, I

mean, you name it and it's kind of Lovecraftian at this point. Honestly, I'm

finding most religions try to sugarcoat what is all fucking terrible. Like angels to be exact. Yeah, absolutely. Everyone has the idea of it. Have you ever seen a biblically accurate angel like,

oh, I mean, yes, but there There's also like six, like tiers of Angel. But they're all they're all super fucked up. Other though, that's like the higher echelon of Angel. The lower ones do be looking like people, but they don't really have really wings. And then other ones, they do have the wings, and the other one's got like a third arm, and then

above that bunch of eyeballs, five,

it starts off with the Winged Angel. And then it just gets fucking worse and worse. So the

more the more important you are in the angel, the more and more horrible and abomination like you look, yes.

I have a question for you guys. What's up? What's the cycle of neuropathic

pain? New, you know, hey,

we are not covering that, because that's literally a collect

45 different novels.

And the TLDR just what? No,

no, because each Doug says novels, honestly, they'd be more akin to like an encyclopedia. I mean,

like, is it are the novels called the cycles of neurons?

is a collection of information. Okay,

that's what I meant. Like, like, like cycles of like, it basically

goes or so. And it's those anthology focused on the works referring to or inspired by the UN the DT Nyarlathotep, edited by a Lovecraftian scholar, Robert enprise. Yep, this book includes an introduction by price tracing the roots and development of the God of 1000 forms. The content includes a list of 45 million books.

That's not that many.

No, it's a lot. It's the Okay, so the collection of information on these beings so you got like the cycle of near left up, you get the cycle of as a thought you get the cycle of Cheb nigger, and you've got the cycle of Cthulhu those are the four that I know of, as of right now. I'm sure that will be more but as of right now, there's a complete ones that exist, and they are like

20 Full ass books. There's like think think like encyclopedia books literally like a fucking like paperback.

It's an Encyclopedia Britannica of neuroethics. Actually, it's

called the encyclopedia. Cthulhu Ania. But

yes,

now the Tasmanian devil. Well, he's Yeah.

God, I have so much how much medical knowledge do you think I'm going to have in my head right now?

Dude, I so I was like, like, just sitting here. Like, I was talking about it. Like, it's funny because like, it's like, I know that we enjoy these episodes a little more than we need to. Because while we're talking, we're just like, fucking info dumping or like not allowing any room for jokes to be happened. No,

not at all. But you know, that's part of the fun of you guys are very excited. Oh, God.

Yes, we honestly, I don't know why I took notes. Most of that was just fucking off the dome.

I take notes for the names because that's the best way to pronounce the names that I can't remember. Like, I know most of this information, like here and there. Yeah, like the lineage I had to take notes on, because that gets real fucking real quick.

Try. But yeah,

I do know more about Lovecraft than I care to admit.

ABS I'm actually I'm starting my third read through of that fucking complete fiction.

draft and I'm learning more as we go as well

speaking um, do you want to improv a quiz real

quick here? No, I got the first question. Right. I'm a fail. What year was the first time he showed up at riding?

Near 1936?

No, no, wait, wait, wait,

was was a close?

Hi. No. In the grand scheme, if you were to look at the entire entirety of human history, yes. You know, 1920 1920 in the pros poem. I knew what, neuropathic Yes that one you got. job buddy. Another one

famous nickname? The black Pharaoh. No, the 1000 man

that no that just describes his 1000 masks.

The Metallica lyrics

the crawling chaos Yeah, that

is absolutely do

you really think the falling chaos is what he's best known as?

It's not that we think that that

that's what he is. It's just kind of I always whenever I think in neuroethics up I think of the black Sarah I don't think of crawling

but that's because we talked like Doug you Okay, Doug and I know way too fucking much about like the backstories and the histories in the shed. And the reason we talked about the black Pharaoh so much is because at least to me I don't know about I'm not gonna put words in his mouth to me like that's the like where it all started.

To me the name goes off Pharaoh vibes that's why I think I think if he went to like, if you came up to a vote he he's so he came up to a person like me and was like Hey, what do you think neural data tab looks like they're probably gonna be like fucking mummy. That's not saying like peanut gallery people probably think more mummy than they do crawling.

Well, but that's that's the thing that like he also did. So he's he is in Egyptian in the Egyptian pantheon as well. Like he is an Egyptian god yeah technically under under a different name and you're actually going to find this a lot like I actually just found information that shows that both Christianity and Hinduism both outline as a Thoth as a being obviously a different name but description to a fucking tee What was that shit

you found out about the Vatican?

Oh, that's what I'm talking about in the fucking in the Vatican's fucking locked secret asset library you can find banned books that go over the creation of the universe and they go over like specifics and shit Do I believe this information? Not really. I'm gonna have to see it for myself.

crazy how Tom Hanks and find that while looking for the Davinci Code

I'm you know you can't win them all.

When Nick Cage stole the declaration I got a

little I mean no one would know this just off the top of their head but Colorado space was actually a sequel to national treasure

cage is some sort of Boolean or Lovecraft at

this point. Yes,

for sure. He's just having a good time.

I was gonna say EOG after

since the internet came out he's like I'm just gonna fuck around for a little bit.

Yeah, yeah. This weird like 1000 year period where he's like, just want to just kick it back like for

now he's making a movie where he is himself. Which is fantastic. Like

how is that

we buy two castles

Peerman New Orleans? Yeah.

We buy a tube for myself before I die

25 grand

yo, yo, pyramid tomb near Aletheia tap pyramid black Pharaoh Nicolas Cage is near La theta. Hell yeah.

Fuckin logic doorway through it

well that's that's it we have more I'm sure

there is a ton more but it's all like we gave we went over like the fundamental basic information of anything you need to know about near a lot of depth to either use him in a Call of Cthulhu or Dungeons Dragons campaign to go read about if you're interested in it like just the basic Are we done

with questions for Michael i You're off

the hook for now. All right. You had another Yeah, I'm

actually I'm thinking that questions better for the next time we do this yeah.

Using God uses brain power. Yeah, very not move. Good. That's fine. Might want to take us out of this. But

I do. I do want to take us out

of here. Actually, while you do that, Doug. Yeah, clean country. Yeah,

you know what? We'll wait we'll let the people do that everybody we're gonna give you like two seconds here. Find some sort of beverage near you doesn't have to be alcohol if you're above age make it alcohol if not, go grab some expired milk. Worst

case scenario. Spit in the glass and drink that.

Yeah, there you go. Speaking of like, Are you drinking enough water? Yeah, take your medicine today. Drinking water.

Are you eating enough?

Just like every time you say that, you look at me with the most like gleeful face like you're you're proud of.

You gotta make sure your loved ones are drinking water and eating enough food and taking them and eaten as much as they can

pay you tomorrow. You're gonna rock it at work tomorrow. You're gonna eat asked me anyway when you hear the clink drink here's to you here's me and if we ever disagree

come on or

take the shot link tree.com/delivery pod anywhere anywhere at delivery pod or dont look under the Internet. In the Link tree you can find our merch that's gonna be weird soon. Yeah.

I think Mike's done

is that you'll find

our discord in there as well go to the discord it's pop and review us on Spotify and Apple podcasts because we need those so other people see us and boy did my ego need other people to see me. Remember people were at 150 Spotify reviews if we get to 200 Pretty quick here. I'm gonna have Doug take over the Twitter for a day. So you'll see a lot of Paul Are you might

get holes that oh my god

that's all I really got you to download on the internet is doing pretty well and again you could find us anywhere dilute the pot or don't look on the internet just fucking look it up it's only really got a buy me a coffee.com/deluded Hey there it is. It says coffee but we're gonna use it for local and then patreon.com/the loony pod we have been discussing you know changing up some tears adding some tears adding some stuff so get in there was hot

Do we just want to be transparent about like what we're talking about real quick we

we literally not 20 Before this before this episode, literally discussed what we can do. There's some events that happen that are making us rethink some things. There are some tears that we want to add

to concrete. No, it's literally we just started talking about this because of what happened. I think we've got one SCP episode in the banks. Yeah. But yeah, after like, we're still debating if we actually want to release it at this point.

Yeah, there's some controversy with SCP we don't want to go all into but it is one of those things where it's like,

I'm hoping it blows Oh,

yeah. Well, the big problem is outfall, the website itself wiki, the SCP wiki is under some trouble. And that's where we got a lot of our information for SCPs. So it's like we work in the band.

I'm ripping the band aid off. Sure. Essentially, what happened is a writer was found out basically a writer was using SCP Foundation either subreddits or like the the site itself, the wiki itself to message minors being an older man, and allegedly we're gonna allegedly allegedly allegedly have no facts. Yeah, I'll I read the statement they gave. They came on. It's are they? Yes, they kind of go

on for two years, until they finally got rid of them. And apparently in allegedly, because I'm not a lawyer. They had evidence for like years, proving that he was doing some, you know, creepy pedophile stuff. It's controversial as

fuck right now, to be fair, we don't stand that shit. Yeah. So so we have to be very, you know, we love doing the about what we do right now. We're monitoring the situation. We want to do what we think is right, which obviously would be to, quote unquote, for lack of a better word, boycott the website. And now

it's not even like we're like actively giving them money. Yeah, no, literally by just talking about it and being excited about some of the content on there. We're sending traffic their way. Yeah, we love the we don't want to we don't want to promote any any institution that knowingly keeps pedophiles employed, because that shows fucking hate.

And again, we don't know the entire story. Everything's allegedly, it? Yes. I don't want to we don't want lawyers coming at me. So allegedly, allegedly, allegedly,

right. Until we hear more. We're gonna just kind of leave things here. Yeah. But we might, you know, worst case scenario, we change our $7, SCP tier to something else. Which, obviously, no concrete plans, we don't know what's going to happen yet. If you are a $7 tier Patreon, we would love to hear what you think. Absolutely. Because there's only three of you.

$10 tiers that listen to you

don't get it doesn't matter.

Whatever, whatever we throw at them.

As you listen to our SCP content, you know, let us know what you think. Because again, we want we want to keep doing the SCPs. But we love doing them. We don't want to support this site. And it does seem like this site is really like the only one that has backlogs of every SCP out there. Yeah, it's so hard to find the information outside of that anywhere else. Yeah. So it's one of those things where you can

find some fanfiction porn that I that I stumbled across earlier.

I mean, I always go on YouTube and try to find things on YouTube. We don't get it's not as easy to do because we

worst fucking case scenario. We make several trips to the back rooms until we figure it out. Yeah,

right. There we go. But yeah, like like Jason said, we do have one of the backlogs that we we may release just to get it out there is like mate, potential final hurrah. Who knows? We'll see how it goes. But you know, again, if you listen to the SCP episodes, you know, let us know what you think it'd be a good idea for you know, potential to replacement or you know, if you want to give us your opinion on what you think this situation means for us, but we could do keep us updated.

Yeah, like we already threw around a couple ideas. You know, like we're also like, like Mike just said, We want to hear your ideas like what would you like to hear us talk about kind of thing like something that has a massive amount of information readily available for us to talk about free.

A massive amount of really cool creative information for free for us to talk about that'd be fucking

great. Always do a backroom corner. That's why you're right.

It's not a bad idea.

It's not there's no talking about hopefully well now there's the ongoing measure but it's the ongoing YouTube channel that's doing it. There's literally millions of levels exalt with detailed information about it. So like, we have ideas. We got some ideas we're tossing around, possibly

change it into a Cthulhu corner. Yeah, possibly do movie like,

Actually guys love it just bombard us tell us what you want to hear us talk about

send us a text or a voicemail that we're gonna play at the end of this episode.

had just opened up the discord and they're all They're all saying back rooms motion.

And then last thing I want you to do last thing I want you all to do is just take it tooth. I don't care where you found it. Brush it off. You found it. Thank you give me that one. Hey, you Thank you. Take your tooth like this one. I have this fat one. I've enjoyed that dog got me and it's really 123 here. I'm holding it in my hand because it's that damn fun. That's a big boy. It's a thick one. Yeah. His ticket to anywhere you find it. Plug your butthole with it. Kind

I want to go ahead and say stay paranoid. If you see a small, like, frail ish man walking around your house that looks like he's holding his hands and he's got like a pile of something in him. That's just Mike trying to stuff teeth and buttholes so just let him be paranoid because otherwise he can't get turned on. But you know, from there, just let it happen.

And I'm going to say if you ever if you ever presenting you're you're you're being the someone who's like tall and slender and smiling a lot and a man. Just any man be real. be real cautious. It could be narla thetop trying to fill you with his horrible, horrible, terrible offspring.

Also don't talk to anybody named Wilbur Whateley. Yes.

Be wary of Wilbur Whateley. Yep. But yeah, if you if you otherwise, beans, pains and automobiles.

Kiss your dad. Kiss your dad.

And I think we're done. We are done.

Yeah, this is a message of Findley. 01001011011010010110110001101100001000000110101001100001011100110110111101101110. All right. Yeah, Jason, if you could just read that recently. Yeah, wouldn't the code all right yep. Back later