DLUTI 031 - Local58

Don't Look Back button that says pause on the TV screen

hopefully to photo it says that but you know I don't fucking believe it so whatever we'll find

something for another day that was a great good that's I'm too close for that now

yeah you can really smell that

could taste it I don't like that then you know what else I don't like

What don't you like Mike

pppppp for it well first yes but everyone we are we listening to you right Welcome to Dont Look Under The Internet where your man is back and not sounding like a dial up Goblin

or a Russian kangaroo or road dial

thing I've ever heard are there kangaroos in Russia

that you know you can't disprove a negative what's the

Russian version of kangaroo jack kangaroo jack off

yeah

I know so kangaroo

Dont Look Under The Internet that's Jason

Hello

that's a dog What up y'all and I'm a guy that ran out of celebrity names

that's all the celebrities Michael k

Jong Hoon Oh,

Michael Payton famous football but Walter

Walter Michael Payne I don't know you know my my grandma's actually related to Walter Payton.

Oh royalty it's horseshit something like that. Prove it

I'm adopted. So it doesn't really matter to me, but

you and your fucking TMZ TMZ is back and they have a scoop. The crazy local news has been trying to find out if famous comedian Richard Pryor was wearing shorts or pants last week at the club. Fox News reporter they confirmed he was wearing shorts. But new recent updates came out that he was indeed wearing pants. CNN hit Fox News by claiming them as liars. Their statement on that matter. Liar Liar. Pants on prior

there they're getting worse.

Honestly,

I you know, I stay up. I I stay up. And I just sweat for at least 45 seconds making these and then I write them down. I think what's a good pot on a celebrity's name prior liar. Pants on Fire?

I mean, to be fair, that's more creative power that I have had in Yeah, I don't

see TMZ coming to you with their news. They don't speak of news. You can catch the news on TV. You can your local TV station.

I hate the news.

What do you remember those those like late night news channels?

No.

You mean every news that there is? No.

No like that. Like, like,

like this town? Like a local like, yeah,

this town has a turkey who's performing in a beauty pageant next week. I'd like news like that.

Did you know that we have a local news station that we're talking about too.

That's a cool story.

I like that local 58. Baby.

Let's get more of that.

Local 58 is what you boys be talking about today? Yes, but,

Mike, have you ever heard of local 58? before? I mean, obviously,

no, not at all. No, I didn't really hear about this until we started looking at a Gemini. At least I mean, you guys told me about it. But I didn't know what it was. I never looked into it. And since I love Gemini, so much. I like this. Not as much though. I think I like john smith better.

Gemini was a lot more fun. In my opinion. Yes,

local 58. To be fair, paved the way for the US to be what they are.

It's one of the first, like at least well known ones to do it.

And if we're being honest, we kind of set this up in a way that led into local 58. Because honestly, I remembered it to be more. Yeah, I'm not saying it sucks. It's a lot of fun. It's just a lot less than I thought it was. So this was originally intended to be a two parter. We looked at it or like,

not. Yeah, instead of it being a two parter, it turned out that this could be done in like, half a part. Or something like that. Yeah, so this might be a little bit of a quickie. We'll fucking see how it goes. quickie. But before we get into the actual episode, shout out to our new patrons. Yes, dx Phoenix. I see you my guy with that dope name.

And what is that number?

None of that number.

We are we are getting

ever closer we have 13 patrons and when we hit 20 we're gonna do a big old d&d board game esque thing. For you guys so

we're certainly at the point where we are we are realizing that that that threshold is coming up way quicker than we thought so we have a date set

get your toasty buns ready my boy yes it's gonna get juicy

oh it's I'm so excited but dx Phoenix thank you you

handsome purses handsome or beautiful I don't know what comment you prefer but you're one of those two yeah and we couldn't do it without you

You're looking good and then pants

yes you're listening to right now I respect that and again like Doug said your pants

cool well they're not listening like right now

future them future

my breaking the metal wall yes okay.

Anyway so thank you dx Phoenix Thank you everybody but dx Phoenix you get the spotlight to do do because you're one cool person you're you're a person

the comment the comment that they left on Patreon was amazing they basically were saying like I've been looking for something in this exact niche and I have not been able to find it so thank you guys so much for doing what you do.

Yes that just sweet person.

Those lines we really

we really love this niche and that's why we put our our pains and our beans into it

just slap them together and you came out so thanks to your what happens when Doug puts a pain in the beam together

no yeah. Speaking of beans and beans

Wait wait wait

wait real quick there's one more shout out that I want to give Okay.

Oh yeah.

Thank you for the amazing pictures and our new merge that we put out Zach you're a model with grace and glory and something here something about baby

that pays way less than minimum wage

Zach's the first boy to buy our merch and hell yeah rocked it by the way you bought the hoodie with the creeper smile on it

go yeah for the the fucking Louis smiler Yeah, it

looks good.

It's so good.

He confirmed that it's quality looking stuff and I'm really happy about that. That doesn't stop any of you if you get purchased our stuff you want to tell me how the quality is let me know and honestly we just know

hats off to Doug let's do oh you don't hit the button.

Oh audience your pigeons no I keep I'm here

I keep the pigeons didn't work last time Why?

Yeah, I don't boy they were stressed it's fun. Audience members rise rise rise Chicken Chicken right. So me so be so fucking

so fucking Todd well,

so you hit that button.

Mike gave me the most discussed

don't yet do audience rise clap for Zach clap my children go go my children clap he gets a little bit of an extra long one so whoa really let it go whoo whoo there it is. This time somebody forgot sorry. That's all for you Zack they're still going.

Are they really alright? See the screen there's a giant it's just one giant button. Right now simmer

simmer Alright, they're dead now. Oh, okay, I put a hand

started drafting a new fucking application

for we're using the serpo clones as our audience members well I don't think I told you that

Yeah, no, I mean you're in charge of logistics behind that so but again thank you Zack that's awesome all of you yes we live hell yeah we do we absolutely if you

get merchant you want to send us pictures and if you're comfortable with it, we will put those pictures up on our socials. You can find our link for our merchant and the link tree and every episode and every episode right now just scroll like an inch so it looks good and we're really happy about it. We just ordered our own for us to wear so Oh yeah, yeah.

Oh yeah, we are sampling our own shit because we think it's fires.

So anyways, local 5050 Yeah, no

gushing over people who enjoy what we're doing. I mean, it's hard not to but local 58

Can you tell me what a local 58 is?

Well, you see, when I went to a man, local 58 and a woman 58 get together and they slap their peens and beans together and what is that? They make? Whatever the hell this

abomination one would say.

Yeah, a big mockery of God, but some of them almost might call it a I don't know a path maker. away paver,

a pave waiver.

Why did you just have that?

You set it first and I just clicked a paveway for a wafer wafer

bunch of things. This is going in the direction very quickly.

We're all in the same place. For like the first time in a while

I'm coming off Riot fest weekend Doug was at Gen Con all weekend we are tired

I was feeling a bit tired

oh you guys might be able to hear my voice I was a bit the Batman voice going on with Batman

must have missed the wait why do we fall off john Kermit

okay so we're doing great

yeah Doug give us some deep so what is this if you could describe it

alright so local 58 another analog horror that we absolutely love baby yeah pretty much and this one is what we would call probably the the thing that led all other analog horror into existence

This is like the Ben drowned but of analog or

yeah yeah,

absolutely. It's it's an amazing series it's very short which is kind of nice if you don't want to you know spend eight to nine hours watching things especially like with you know, you got your Marble Hornets which is nine hours you got you Marble Hornets.

You got your ash vlogs that is like probably like 50 hours worth of local 58 is like 15 minutes of content at most is that they'd like

videos that don't pass about five minutes yeah

the hang five minutes and 15 seconds is like the longest you'll find Yeah,

and two of the videos are just like recaps so you don't even really have to watch them

yeah, there's seasons quote unquote in this

here's a fun part that I didn't let you guys in on yet okay, my dumb ass the first two times I watched them watch them in reverse order because the way that they're set up on the YouTube channel, which is local 58 is in reverse order

unless a fun fact everything on YouTube is in reverse order. I

didn't know that unless you find a playlist yeah didn't know that. Or you can go to uploads and any season one season two

so I watched them in the wrong order.

Hey Aren't you supposed to be like an amateur and vet internet investigator

I'm an idiot

the dynamic This makes complete sense. It's fair but to be fair, I guess you don't really have to watch these in order for it to not make it

anyway ittle bit wanting it again in the actual order it does help

it does it

does it does I will say that it definitely does. Notice

I'm going to apologize real quick for the throat noise I'm going to make as my allergies are killing me. allergy so I got up eventually. That's true. He's not Whoa, that wasn't my pants that was a hoodie unzipping

so we're all sitting on a black couch right now yeah,

we actually we acquired a casting couch

and we're gonna fuck one of us.

We are all going to fuck one of us.

straws we can draw those later but shit let's uh

yeah

yeah that's that's a good

segue get some like ever new station music and put it right here as

I should just use the local 58 noise

I guess after that started now that we got the new station music going that is the music straight from a local 58 page two but the first video you see is called you are on the fastest available route it essentially starts off with this like old style looking like would you guys call it

black and white? Like dashcam

no no it starts off with like it says like local 50 and it's like at all like new blood test Yeah, yeah broadcast bulletin thing or something? I

think like up

in the 90s you know what these local I knew stayed up way too late. Yeah, exactly what this

Yeah, it'll be like 315 Yeah, like 315 you'll

sees that not only shows or that Yeah,

but this one it says like at 1205 will be the midnight movie. And then you see like someone is like backspacing the text and they just delete the words midnight movie, and then it just glitches out and goes to this like kind of shitty looking dashcam it's like a fucking cathode ray. Yeah. Which is weird to me. Because if you look at the data takes place in 2014 Yep. So there's no reason for shitty. I mean, like, we had GoPros then

other than to cultivate some Mystique, Mystique forgetting like x man. Yeah,

just like her. Actually it's Mystique disguised as limra

naked and ginger and a camera in your

dash cam. Also that my three favorite thing? Yes, but it's just a guy and it's just him driving and it's like storming out. It seems like and it's just all you hear is just the GPS saying. You relax,

in the future because I don't want to watch somebody drive 10 miles

I would watch him drive 10 miles and I would drive 10 miles more

okay we got there

but he he's driving and they're just telling him you know take a ride ticket or whatever and then it glitches again to where he is in the woods

yeah and the the unlike this back was as a

road you see it actually tell him to turn off on unnamed road

yeah yeah it tells him turn into unnamed road and 100 feet so you know and then it glitches and he's in it and then it says like you'll reach your destination and 200 feet stay on unknown road and it says like ignore the Do Not Enter signs It's like my GPS shouldn't be the center in terms of

saying like you're not enter sign

Yeah follow road with do not or yeah what like something like that it's fucking weird

yeah I don't need Siri being in this specific especially if I'm in the woods and she just changes from fucking Oh turn right on fucking route 30 whatever. And then she's like hey at that branch up ahead turn left

don't like that. No, yeah, none of that do you just want to kind of sample it just to give to set the mood because I feel like well this is a good opportunity we

can sample it but let me get up too soon. Okay, so he's driving up and then he gets another notification it's like 100 feet do this and we're gonna play what happens at that 100 feet point Yeah, right there that 100 yards we're very close to each other from slack and Jason arise

check out our socials because we recently got a very very very good camera that our patrons helped us by so thank you guys so much we have a lot in store for you when it comes to YouTube but you're definitely gonna see Mike playing with my nipples right there

you might who knows you might who knows let's cut to that audio baby girl golly gee before we go into it it's probably going to get pretty loud so just maybe during that dial from here's your here's

you ready this is about how that was gonna be yeah

wow what a great example. Anyway, here we go.

Continue on unnamed road. Then in 300 days, turn off your headlines

are you turn your destination that behind you. In 500 feet, your destination your destination and 250 feet periodic your destination will be 50 feet you will arrive at your destination

boy how'd he was that as loud as I told

you it would be it was Have you ever had your GPS tell you to turn your headlights off?

Yeah right that's a little at that point would he not be like okay reverse let's just get the fuck out of here.

There is one thing I this is the only time I'm gonna interrupt for something like this. It reminds me of I cannot remember the goddamn designation for it but one of the SCPs is a GPS

oh yeah the one that takes you to your do

it takes you through like this long ass tunnel and you find out you wind up in this spire in the middle of desert and then you get your insides sucked out by a black mist?

Yeah it's a good time

and that's what this reminds me of sounds

pretty sexy this

dog I cannot wait to go over more of these Sep I know you've been a good boy about it. sort of

funny new video but kind of

what you guys just heard a little bit obviously you can hear like the the GPS is like oh, you know, 100 feet capacity on known road and it's like in, you know, 100 feet stop, turn off your headlights and he does that. And then you hear all that shit. There's a moment in the video when he turns his headlights back on and you see like a creature standing in the road. And he freaks the fuck out. And they kind of glitches away again and it shows him just clap and cheeks out of the

designated clapping cheeks is going fast.

At this point, they get some of their jaw clenched cheeks and deserves a fucking shirt design. Clap cheeks, I think

I think that's perfect. leads perfectly fine and if you've already purchased shirts I'm sorry that you missed out on this one but you can still buy it

yeah you'll still be able to make that and that next the creepy thing is in the video now you can hear at the end of the the audio there the GPS going like rerouting your destination is 300 feet rerouting it's 250 for every ride on it it's 100 feet that's the fucking creature getting closer and closer like the T rex and Jurassic Park you know things objects from your fucking golden Goblin singing Goblin behind it's just right behind them clapping chicks trying to get at is that but no seriously

you guys go watch this fucking video watch the series watch along with us because we love this shit and as always follow along and is that just a thing follow along

for these ones I would say it's for oh yeah specifically the analog horror follow along at home absolutely enjoyed the visual with the audio

Oh yeah. Yeah,

but that pretty much oh and it ends with a glitching out again and then it's like he's in a car accident

Yeah, you see a shattered screen

yeah like his car anchors

and yeah, it

looks these cars like on the side and then

they go do the staple. fuckin local 58 end sequence

Yeah, right man. That's that's the first episode

right back to the

what? This is where we learn who's making the videos. Chris Straub

Yep. Chris straw. Holy

shit.

strube which has white the category of spooky stories and whatnot.

Yeah makes me think because marriage means like fuck, I didn't know that Chris. Chris existed get

at me.

I love my penis can go in your penis.

what's what's our second video?

blowing right by that huh?

Yes.

Which one of Chris Christie boy? Which one of our penises we'll open up to accept the other ones.

We're waiting? Because we don't

know email us delivery. pod@gmail.com with Y or N on check the box. Would you fuck me? Wait,

are we registered to both? We are now. Okay,

all right. Video two let's go

Alright, video two. It's called contingency It sure is telling more this is my favorite video yeah this is also my favorite video it's just so so bizarre because the way you like the way he has the structured on his YouTube channel. This is like the second thing you see I want to say technically and yeah season one quote unquote

yeah So to give you guys an idea of how this is set up, you can find his videos page which is just a conglomeration of all these don't look at them backwards like Yeah, I

did. No, don't

do that. I mean, you can technically but you'll get way more out of it. If you don't go there playlist page. Start with season one, then go season two. And then watch the bulletins if you want. I but

this one is also his most viewed video if I'm not mistaken. I

wouldn't doubt it.

I understand why. Yeah,

I get it very Why is it his most viewed

Tommy? It's very taupey. So

what's so creepy? Why is it creepy?

Well, it's not creepy in the sense of like, overwhelming dread creeping over you. It's more of like, hopelessness.

Yeah, it's it's like this video almost makes me feel like this is some shit that like our government would actually do. Yeah, like, that's where we're at, in this day and age, even though like the setting is 2014

now this is almost a This was way earlier.

Well, I know. But like, the way that this channel is set up is that it's rebroadcasts? Yeah, it's all rebroadcast. But this one specifically is a rebroadcast that is interrupted by what seems like a civil defense alert for something for so so let me walk you

through this. Yeah, let's let's let's dive into this real quick. So we get

the the local 58 normal, like intro screen, and it just says this broadcast ends at 3am. And then we get a weird

cut and then 3am happens

apparently, apparently, yeah. We get a weird cut where, like some sort of like alarm is happening where like, this is something the station is broadcasting because the quote unquote, the Department for the preservation of American dignity.

Not if there's one thing I know if there's one thing I'm known for, it's having dignity.

Is that right? Very Oh, man. I don't know you very well. Know that you put your balls in a lizard gauge.

Yeah, my dignity and shame is, well, the shame is high that we're not going to show it go on. Should I get in touch I keep

going okay, so sorry no no it's fine No one cares about this you know

they know they do oh yeah you know Mike and I thought that we had to say was more important than the content

Oh absolutely.

Lizard cage are more important. And you know what I'm never gonna I'm never gonna deep dive more into that story. People are gonna get a lizard again that's how you're gonna get dunk whoa I'll stop interrupting

Alright, so anyways, we get a an interruption from the like I said the Department of preservation for American dignity. And you don't actually see these words it's like plastered in the seal that's like a sigil Yeah, and after you see the seal pop up you get this text underneath it and it says this is only to be broadcast in the event of the USA the USA is complete surrender to insurmountable enemy forces which right off the bat is just like what Guardian Vietnam surmount

you will almost every modern war that the US has been a part of

pretty much so it goes on and basically cuts to a new new like card and it says please comply with the following you were called upon to act and act as like in this big bold like text and says even in defeat we refuse to comply with our enemies and then basically go

hey everybody

before we get to this next patch trigger warning trigger warning we're super hard trigger warning

again all honestly all the proceeds that we just fucking made from some merch sales

we still need to figure that out for a video games by the way either way

large donation from us coming from from the lutie to the Suicide Prevention hotline because Doug what to say

so in in a nutshell without saying everything that it says because it's just fucking graphic as home it basically says on a live yourself Yeah, literally it basically is an app it literally is telling you that it's just apps to find the closest thing to you yes Yep. And use that to kill yourself Yep. And that being said it says if you have a gun that's the preferred method and basically tells you to sell your fucking ad

this resonated with me because I thought it was just well thought out and I know that's weird about you know, a suicide request but when they said like, here are the preferred methods like it goes into like the front lawn like bullshit like that but do you remember the three out of three or three apps or all three apps but the thing Yeah, the thing that got me the most was like remember the patriotic method is placed the gun at the roof of your mouth and pulling the

yeah, this this video fucked me up because so this is one of the videos that like when we first got into this like this was I want to say like very close to the beginning of things that we were watching. Oh yeah. Oh 58 we were like, fuck is this this is

like our intro. Yeah, we had no idea about what it was at all.

And it's just wild that somebody thought this through for like, just a creepy story which honestly, it is fucking phenomenal.

Very much

obviously we're talking about it for a reason. But obviously we don't want anyone to kill themselves for any reason. But

please, please please please note,

but we reach out

to the hotline if you need it.

Yes, please. Reach out to us too.

But we are we talk about horror topics. Yes, we talked about a lot of fucked up mass suicides a huge trope in horror, so it's hard to avoid.

There's a lot of fucked up things in horror that play upon people's fears. And this is one of them. Oh ABS a fucking luly so if you have trouble understanding that this is not the place for you. Yeah. But that being said, we did want to give you a trigger warning because obviously we care about the way that people feel about things and we know that it can be hard for people to listen to stuff like this. So anyways, yeah, it tells you to put the gun to the roof of your mouth

man it's gotten like that staple American PSA. Yeah.

triatic like the music to it. Yeah, and I guess I don't know do you

guys think about that being the worst part. The next bits is what I think is a little talking

about them three F's after three F's, okay, well, yep, basically the three F's so after it tells you how to kill yourself properly. It also does It it does mention that infants and pets go first

that's what I was talking about it said infants and pets are the best patriots yes are the smallest feature yes

the smallest that's fucked up. Why you have to do the pets I don't know. I would just really say

has something to do with just getting rid of the entire family and pets or parts

has to do with the dignity thing dignity

like subjecting yourself to things that from I mean, to be fair has been reinforced in the last couple of years. If you are an American, you should be able to do what the fuck you want more and that should mean if you're about to be undignified whatever version of that word you know exists in your mind you should be able to take the easy way out but or the hard way

out if you're going to be a patriot and you're going to endure you're going to unknown live yourself a for America there are the three F's and you have to remember this you do these are very important this

is almost as important as like passing race for fire safety

oh absolutely or if you you know your house is now not yours because of weather because storm different different topics. So the three F's for anyone who is curious because we keep bringing it up and we haven't told you what it is yet. The three F's are front lawn, face up, feet together, feet together so when you kill yourself be in your front lawn face up just with your feet together

just lay there like a vampire in his coffin.

yeah pretty much picture card make

sure the enemy knows that you're you're you're proud of the property you own

by displaying like a flag on there you go

you are the thing you disrespect

we talk about this so fucking casually but like this this is the stuff of nightmares

dude. That's the fucked up things that we can talk about casually because we are so ingrained and desensitized to all of this stuff that's like yeah, this is okay.

Thanks to girls

we're gonna suck me off now like is that the next step?

Rama McDonald's is gonna leave a fuckin MC shit in my fucking mouth when I do this. I am

crazy. The moment I saw two girls one cup was the moment I knew there is no hope for humanity.

I am convinced and I died on inside. I am convinced the grimace is legitimately Ronald McDonald's amputated third test and Ronald Khan like there is no other explanation for what he is

run on somebody. Yeah, so that pretty much sums up contingency. I know we talked about it for way longer than five minutes but the video is about five minutes long. So yeah, pretty short. Do what you will with the information that we gave you but as we said watch the video listen to us talk about it. It's the best way to go about pretty much all this shit because we are an audio media and not a video. Yeah,

you say that?

I say I I was burned screwing you. Oh, I

thank you so much that we've bought a camera. Hey, patrons. We love you so fucking much because you guys just bought us a camera. We have a video setup now we are fucking around with it. We are learning the ropes. So be patient with us. But there are some very fucking good things coming. But the next thing is coming. Did you say Patreon patrons on Patreon

Well, maybe not

what's the next thing that's coming Jase also

the by the beers the merge tent is that we're calling it

we'll call it merge pain.

Merge beam

yeah merge all right, go visit our merge pain. Help us out big fat merge pain knowledge give you that merge commies.

Now you guys have already done so much for us you got like you helped us get this green screen this bind us. You always get this camera they're gonna make use of the green screen. Like it's all coming together. But all right, so all coming together. Oh yeah. But so speaking of analyzing yourself

You can't You can't pass over the fact that we get like a tornado warning.

So when this launches into you see the screen for local 58 and it says what's coming next gives you the breakdown and then it goes into the weather warning system you all know the sound

Can we just play can we yeah you know what

i'm not convinced everyone knows the sound

I'm not either I think it just adds to the mic is doing a great job actually

fairly spot on and then you get the really shitty audio it's like oozes weather

storms inside the ride at all

times so without further ado This is kind of what you hear on on whether service or sorry

also service whether audio audio warning again it might be loud so

warning for loud audio but please put a earmuffs on your balls hopefully the fucking service I'm paying for helps with that it won't doubt it here we go

so

that's kind of the beginning sound and I'm sure all of you are very very very familiar my impression was not off by much no you were you were fucking spot on but now that's that like it's the the Emergency Broadcast System that's basically hitting this channel and it tells you like hey there's a storm there's something near logical happening and you should just stay inside you know remain calm probably

shouldn't look at it right

Don't be looking at anything see

it does say that it says to be don't look up Don't look at the moon

window don't look at

the mirrors. This is a lot of weird

things. You don't just kind of just stare at the floor.

Yeah, it says all those things and then it takes a weird turn be like oh 180 and then all of a sudden

it's like oh no no,

we lied I'm sorry. It's okay go ahead look up look at the moon put them in yours you're fine You're cool man go outside go outside and look up mm hmm almost directly like that. Yep. And like fucking do this it kind of

looks like two people like fighting over like this day because you see like the text come up and you see like someone trying to erase it real quick like don't do that and it gets like shifts to another panel it's like they're frantically like

somebody is fighting for control of the teleprompter yeah

or something but

yeah no it says don't look up don't get the moon don't the mirrors and then switches and says do all of those fucking things

do all those things. Love the moon Good luck

and then it gets super fun read read the whole crater on absolutely creepy so one of the things that you are going to notice with this series is it relies heavily on the moon of the lunar cycle like those two things are very very very integral to this whole series.

telling you to look but not look but look but don't do don't do

kind of like in Gemini when it says like hey, put this radio next to this dome. Turn it on, but don't listen. It's all auditory hallucinations. shit like don't don't look.

Yeah, and this video ends with like, creepiest set of text. Yeah. That I think is throughout the whole series. He goes like so after you see this little battle He's like, he found me through the mirror. White Light guys. Not late, but blood. I drowned him if you were afraid we'll look together what what does that

mean?

Yeah, you nailed it one take

you did you did the thing. I'm so proud of you.

sober totally tober me it's very it sounds like someone is telling you their experience from them looking at the moon. But like like through a mirror because he's like, he found me through the mirror

who's fighting for power right now?

Yeah, I don't know. That's a good question. I mean, we figured out kind of maybe talking about

in this specific video

know the past couple videos.

Yeah, because you see the first one you see him trying to hurt you. They racing them in Oh, yeah. Who

is local 58 being trying to help us.

It's almost like there's there's somebody Who is writing a script? And then somebody who is last minute editing it

and write the script. It's like live right? No,

fuck you. This is not how this goes. And it's just a constant struggle between who gets right what for whoever's talking here. And that's one of the things is like, huh, yeah, we

kind of get the sense that maybe, maybe, we don't know for sure. But local 58 may have someone who's trying to help us.

Yep. Right and it's all possible there. So from right here you can kind of surmise two outcomes one is that surmise?

Yes, I like it.

Thank you surmise. Oh, that's a sexy ring to it. Anyway.

That takes us to our next video.

I guess don't look what I do. I look like I know what a

JPEG is. Our next step, our next video is station ID, which is 19 seconds long. There's nothing to it, so we're not going to really elaborate on it. You just get the local 58 screen, glitches a whole bunch. And then it says look away It does not matter. There are other receivers safety in numbers.

So do you have an idea? This is broken into two seasons? Yeah, each season is three episodes. Each so six episodes between the two?

Yes. That would be three plus three. I guess. Math

is great. Math is good. Thank God for jumpstart third grade.

Seriously, fucking. You guys weren't able to tell me about what happened is I'm just glitched out of the bonus episode. I don't know what that is. Oh, man.

Listen to that bonus episode. It's a good It's good.

Anyway, it's just like,

you can also listen to that bonus episode if you're a Patreon for $5 it's just some cryptic cryptic shit though. Like it's just three text prompts Yep, that's

it 19 seconds that's all you get and there's glitchy Welcome to analog horror. Yeah,

that's kind of what that's the staple it right vague cryptic.

I guess that kind of I mean takes us to our our next one. Because again, there wasn't there's not much to there's not much to elaborate on with that.

I guess there's no way to segue from this one to the next Yeah,

because this one's very different than anything different it's so good though. But this one's called show for children and you get the classic you know local 58 you know main screen where it shows you what's going on for the night and it actually says show for children. Jason just right to his mic

guys that's fine we we just had we had a new setup because of all the shit that you helped us by and I'm still getting used to it Yeah,

now we're definitely left and right. But long story short show for children is actually it's a very it's a longer episode. One of the longer episodes as far as like five minutes ago not long at all but like

it kind of realizes that we have show for children in the last episode we had games for children Yeah,

that's weird. Like someone rip someone off fucking idiot. I'm just kidding. But Gemini is great and everything about Gemini but So anyways, we get show for children and we get this like cartoony ask skeleton cartoon and his name is cadaver. It's very French the way that

this guy is essentially making his own Stephen King universe Yeah. Because all this all his all his books and every and novels and creepy passes and stuff take place in the exact same County.

Yes. So we have a lot that was at that exact point. Gives us so many different theories about this whole series. He hit so To be fair, he takes a while to put out videos in this series. Yes. And that's totally fine because they're honestly all fucking quality stars,

right? He takes longer, but he puts up quality.

Yeah, and I'd rather quality over quantity. Oh, to be to be fair, and

not to mention Not to be confused with how we are structuring our podcast. Yes, we

prefer quality over quantity. Stay tuned for our next episode, our bonus episodes coming out at the same time as this one and then next week's episode, and that was bonus episode and get ready for the other ship that's coming up to quantity.

Our whole approach is just content with our brains known and just throw it at a wall and maybe somebody will pick it up.

Yeah, no, I mean

I wish I was kidding about that.

Long Because I appreciate you guys for following me through with that. So so yeah we get show for children like his shorts I

just realized that he's wearing nice short we're all close quarters you guys are about to get a bunch of pictures

yeah we're we're all slapping pins together so yeah so you get this cartoon it's kind of like the way I would describe it as a like spaghetti kind of Western yeah spaghetti western it's got a lot of those things in it that make spaghetti western very good but no so you get you get this little cartoon with a skeleton and he's kind of just walking along and he keeps looking into graves and it keeps seeing weird things in the grave and very weird thing that's literally all it is and we

small detail on it he looks into a grave see some weird freaky looking dead body looks that another one sees some weird like looks like a fleshy bird or test yeah and then it looks at the third one it's a giant hole and it looks like it goes down the hole

yeah and then the cave yeah

and then we end the video with him going into the grave and then like you kind of see so every time he looks into the grave we keep seeing the moon and the moon keeps up moon yeah and it keeps looking into the graves and then the final final cut is him in the grave. He doesn't look like himself anymore It looks like a very like look at him

first he's like I'm sleeping and then you see the moon overhead like shining into the grave and you cut back and I mean it's

kind of Moon's got a free face on it

he did and it's very funny with this analog or apparently planets have a lot to do with everything I

was about to like the moon the

other planets celestial bodies yeah like a staple Yeah,

it seems like a lot of analog horror is Eldrick eldritch or whatever Oh

absolutely. But also in analog horror there is no shortage of grainy sky

video Yes. grainy sky if you want to make analog we're

taking a camera to the 80s and just pointed up

Yeah,

yeah no Absolutely. And then somehow focus it really really really really well onto the moon and you can see everything on the moon I have actually my camera can zoom into the moon really well

huh we should try this new one

I showed you guys those cameras but the pictures

those pictures those are actually really great I took one

this weekend actually yeah

let's pull it up on the audio show.

Yeah put up the data

yeah if you guys want to see she's a moon here look at it just just act like you can see the moon right now but like

wow audience go wow look at that detail.

Wow is a man that audience go wow is a man there

there is a man on the moon so it's a smudge.

Like you might

have never seen cheese like this fucking

British anyway so that's all you really get from the show of for children.

Yeah, it's I mean it's it's it's very well done.

The animation is pretty cool.

It's that's my favorite style of animation like competish I mean I grew up with that so I guess it's nostalgic as hell but it's actually

called rubber hose animation. It's very like bouncy and like

if you were never stopped moving Yeah,

it's and this this this particular one isn't quite rubber hose but like it's the best thing I could describe it as. So like if you ever watched like Betty Boop cartoons like that's kind of what I'm talking about. Yeah. And we mentioned cuphead that's very very very similar to that style of animation. But yeah, that's kind of what it looks like.

And unfortunately

that's it unfortunately. But we do have like an honorable mentions video yeah, and my honorable mentions I mean a recap.

Yeah, no it's so this is a they basically go through a

few of the music from supernatural during sonar you know they start up every so far. Yeah, you know they start with every season where it's like the journey so far. Yeah, that I guess I don't remember the song they use

but our version of that. Ready play.

So good next Sokka Sokka managers all day each had different versions. Yeah, we did.

We did but Celica huge message. That's what's important. So yeah we go into this little mention again it's a it's a it's a recap so there there are two of these bullets it's

like a trailer

yeah it's basically like so these uploads happen sporadically and it's over a long period of time so as we kind of do with our multi part episodes this person is doing with their YouTube videos saying like hey, here's what you missed and just runs down pretty much everything that we just said. So I don't think we have to cover this

now. The

only thing that we get from these episodes is the very first part of them and it's it's the it's just straight text on the screen. And it says we've always been here Yeah, we send signals to ourselves through their domain did we really believe they wouldn't add their own

and that's the only Yeah, that's the only additional information basically suggesting that the signals you know, the video signals being recorded might have been invaded by somebody else. Doug is your colon okay?

No, it's not I just moved half an inch and you hurt you all heard that Oh, yes. That's a

futon is all noisy broad Yeah, yeah. I go I guess after that subscribe

to our Patreon device.

So after this this other recap we we go into another one of my favorite videos and it is called real sleep real sleep for real now peeps This should take everybody who has been a passionate listener of ours way way way way back to Episode One

it always comes back to the sleep always back every

time the dream survey we can never escape which by the way,

Mike I you have to remind me to fucking change your name and my phone.

Oh, I'm still under the sleep project. You're still on a dream survey

and whenever you call me like I shit my pants a little bit because that's terrifying.

So I have to do that but remember we tried to prank dog and that failed miserably smart boy

he's a smart boy.

I was too much fucking bullshit what you're too

into the energies You're

too into one either way too much CSI Miami

so real Are you real some real sleep? Real Man

G is Mr.

had somebody here knows that. The next video is called real sleep. And it's

wow that reignited something.

I know right? There's so many commercials with shorts man you look at you Mr. shorts. Yeah, but no some real sleep is again it's another segment of this whole series and it talks about recording your dreams and displaying them in a visual medium

we've seen that we had before for

we've seen that with a shout box when we went did that brick county. We saw that when we did

the dream. Right What episode it's when your favorite stud? Never literally never have that episode deferent county Nope. I

have no idea you could not stop ranting and raving about how much fun you had on that episode.

Pretty sure we don't have an episode.

Either way, if you guys remember the shoutbox portion, Deptford county I know Doug refuses to believe that actually exists.

It didn't it does not we didn't do that.

Alright proven wrong. Everybody link us up. And hey, the worst thing that could happen here is that we get we do

Part Two

I would rather Nope. I'm trigger warning.

I'm going

he's gonna be a patriot.

I would rather on a live and myself. Have to talk about that for

me. We will build a cardboard cutout or I will put a black garbage bag over a box fan and put a duct tape face on it and that will be dug for the day. Yep, that's fine. I'm okay. Okay. Well, either way. Real sleep. Okay. Reminds me of the dream survey reminder that free county Nope. Just let stop. Let me

stop do this. No. Anyways, go on.

So this basically just goes over people who have problems sleeping, and it almost seems like a program that you sign up for. And you receive a workbook and they go through the whole thing with you. And it's this personalized testing about how to make you sleep better and to make you

stop dreaming more specifically, yes

to make you. They say dreamless sleep is the best sleep. And like I get that I do because I've woken up from dreams and been like, out of breath like I'm trying to sleep Why do I feel like I just ran for miles I don't do that. Um What else this is like a it's like a program that you go into to help you sleep without dreaming and honestly to me that's fucking terrifying yeah

it like it's like that one se classes but they like give you exercises to do to help you not dream so you just have an inside hours yes

it's all it's all personalized and that's the thing that gets me because every time they address you it's like you have completed this section and we are using your responses to personalize your dreamless sleep experience yeah

this this this episode starts with like a thing that says like this tape is non transferable it's for like I forget his name it's like fill it fill up something you remember the excitement map fill the future no that the episode starts off by just saying tape this tape is created solely for like fill up blank for fill so we find out that all these exercises are for a specific person even says like oh, each mind is different these exercises might not work for you.

Yeah, but they do go on to say like if you would like to visit the portion of this video that outlines your specific sleep patterns and what you need to do to make sure you don't dream. Here you go turn to page six your workbook. Yeah, I have one of those. Yeah, I wish it Where do we find that if we could find a workbook i'd feel it's

probably at the Scholastic Book

Fair. There's also a dead giveaway on when the video starts there's a bunch of text that obviously says this but the text that says like what the numbered like number and letters of the the video are are in a

way to represent filler Yeah,

it should also draw you way more into the series because it did for me as soon as I found out that like some of this was personalized I was like oh, this has given me some pet scout fives this has given me some like a lot of different analog horror versus video game horror vibes. Fan fucking tastic so let's get into what the content

right? This tape is this tape is brought to you by a company to

it very much so is

I don't remember the name of the company's tribe. I don't remember what it stands for though. Fuck.

I don't remember either.

I don't write it down.

brb.

I think it wasn't that important.

It's very important. Mayan portal please. It's important for my theory on what's going on.

I actually it is important I just didn't write it down in my notes for some reason. Everyone just

stay calm. So honestly, stay call. I knew it was important. But I'm like, Doug's got this

thought research and this initiative,

thought Research Initiative. Dr. CRI, thoughts, thoughts. But now so by the thought Research Initiative, we have this dream collection program where you can store your dreams you can view your dreams which Whoa, what? But it basically it goes over a bunch of different like staples in like the belief system behind this whole program saying like, pre cognition is a lie. And it does that by saying like, hey, do dreams have any kind of effect on the future? Like do you have a dream and you think

I love Whoa, whoa, whoa nonchalantly is too It's Yeah, right. It's like it does all those like true and false questions, but it answers with dislike, like the heavy fucking,

by neural beats. Yeah, it's just like, hey, by neural noises going on there.

You're a primitive piece of shit. Exactly.

So from there, they established that dreaming is primitive dreaming is Neolithic big.

The vestige of a primitive mind. Pretty much Yes. Yeah.

They try to do big talk to me. Fuck you. Rich people. In your big words. They

tell you that your dreams don't mean anything to the nation. Like it's Yes. They're like hey, you think you're special because your dream now

you're stupid stupid face.

They do say however that REM sleep is 100% necessary. However, if you dream while in REM sleep, it is not necessary they

say the dream part is like just a coincidence or something that just happens

they honestly say that it like detracts from your well being like they make it seem unhealthy. Yeah. Which is the whole premise of this program saying hey, we will help you remove your dreams so you can get a very well rested night.

What? Well, yeah, what are you talking about dream? And then they talk about the claimant? mappers Oh,

gee, there's a lot so they go no more dreaming, they go to the claimant map which do you guys did you hit? Do you guys get a grasp on what No, no, it took me a fucking minute, but I did. So my brain turned into small brain from what I understand the claimant map is a base it's basically a graph of stimuli that's like personalized to you as a person. Yeah, that will make you dream different things feel different things

Yeah, it's like a specialized treatment to your frontal lobe that basically makes you stop drink Yeah, pretty much because specialized purpose Yeah, everyone's different. And to stop dreaming is honestly probably one of the biggest scientific things that could ever happen in our lifetime like

actually turn your fucking brain off right now.

All you need is God That sounds good. Was it calling for Freddy vs Jason hypnosis oh

god help yourself right yeah,

that's all you need. Just take that you won't dream anymore. So they

go over this clip and map thing and they say like hey, you can use this to kind of we are using this to dictate what you need to make sure you stop dreaming

here's your specialized fuckin version of that

yeah pretty much which is then getting into the anti dream which is honestly way more technical than I thought it was going to be it goes over like you have to play to frequencies that like line up with your anti frequencies and that's going to cancel out your dream waves and it's very David Ike if anyone has read David like before

I don't even know who that is. Oh,

oh buddy. I feel like the three of us you would enjoy David like he loves lizard people

I love lizard people to

who doesn't like hit me up

look up some david i i'm not saying it's good content like morally or ethically at all he does share say

a lot he do be saying

if bitch was calling people that aren't white bad so I'm not gonna watch these incredibly racist but but if you can if you can know that racism is terrible I'm not gonna understand that you can find our free platform does not pay him anything for it cool if you have to sponsor him to watch this shit please don't

please avoid David icon Okay, David I don't hit me up to fuck with people I want nothing to do with you now

well the last part of this video goes into how do we induce the anti dream which is just pure rest there's nothing going on there's no neurons firing at all and there's I think there's one there's a four different steps that you can go through them like that it was like calibration. Visual calibration there was cortical memory. There was ablation of the subconscious and there was rapid fire

it was just the three but the last part of the video right rapid fire

that was a like a basically a test of like your subconscious will to like differentiate items I guess yeah, but every one of these tests has to do with like the negative of a face scan faces like the first one is like it's like every seconds like here's a face here's a face here's a face and as it goes on it gets more rapid and more disturbing until you get to the very last one and it's just none of these are face but

it's really fucking weird because like while the faces are showing up you hear that that fucking audio guys sir no

face there are no faces there are no faces got guys go watch this video. Yeah, it's creepy as shit. I am not doing this justice at all. But it's it's fucking fantastic. So it tells you that as showing you these negatives of video Clearly faces in saying there is no face there are no faces there are no faces there is no face over and over again. It's so good and I wish it had more to do with the last several videos I mean

one more video now you know I know

we're on the last bit of videos

so what do we got?

What are the last video is

fucking skywatching which should be a Zelda game

it should be it starts off with the local 58 fucking the display and then it's like

the people here

yes it's like sky watching and then it goes to this fun like adventury fun it's like sky watching and then just immediately stops it's like sky watching like this real dark stuff. It goes from this bright like 80s fog to just like times new roman Texas kind of like digital texts. You

ever seen the movie alien? Like every shooter on that? Yeah, that font

just skywatching It's a great this is what we're in for and it's just a dude with his camera, and he's just looking up in the sky. He zooms it in on Orion's belt and then Tech's come up and he says there's that's fucking that's Orion's Belt right there.

Yep, and then what's the next one Mike

The next one is my favorite I know guys he goes to a different spot and he adjusts the fucking like contrast or whatever and then it's a cluster of stars and it says close stars he says please I'm like I'm home. Fucking not laying area no but the 80s is where the fucking greys come from? Yeah, unless they come from serpo because circles all

those the fragile greys

yeah Pleiades is home to a lot of different lizard This is all

bonus ships anyway

and then it cuts away from ladies and it just goes to the moon and then it's just like Moon is thrown it's like I don't Who is this him fell on it Why is this is crazy sitting on the moon is not a chair you idiot What's wrong with you? Was this the

video where like he puts the camera down and he like walks out in front of it yeah it's like throwing his hands up and like I'm

so glad that you spoil the last bit of the that is the last so sorry but no it's fine dick what I forgot already so the viewers did not so it essentially is him looking at the moon and he puts on like different lenses so we can zoom into the moon more and more so you start to notice that the lower half of the moon is like it looks like it's being taken over by the selling to a black yeah it's and he zooms in more and you can see this like fleshy stuff on the moon

yes and veins

very well like webway yeah and

there's movement

yeah you see like it kind of looks like air currents being sucked into like a crater but I don't think that's air is it I think it's like this of the moon like the rock from the moon like breathing Yeah, yeah. And it keeps zooming in more and more so you see more of this like fleshy whatever that's taking over the moon

it's like something as a massing something yeah and then it cuts this

one crater on the moon and it's got like an arrow on it. Yeah, and you know no one mentioned it goosebumps do

Whoo hoo does not feel good.

It shows us like this arrow on it. And then it I think you could see letters above it but no one in any of the videos that we looked at mentioned it but I see Yeah, it looks like a city. It's a city I saw letters. I saw what it looks like it spells out or you can see like an L and o alumni. It looks like a kind of spelling out trying to smell like a local 58 or something. Like if we rewatch after this I'll show you Yeah, we're gonna head and you can see a Lions Head too, which is kind

like from what I saw it looked like a let's say Atlantis was on the moon. Yeah, that's what it looked like.

Yeah. Um, but and then it shows him just kind of cut from that. And the moon is just gone it's not the sky anymore. And then one small cut and then but a boost key. You just see this giant fucking moon in the sky. It's hella bright here. And the light when you see it, you get this fucking sense of urgency because the fuckin like tornado sirens just start going off in the area. And you see like all this like, the fleshy stuff on

it's creepy It's so fucking but like,

you get this like sense of like fear because it the moon just like it just comes into

a button. To the size of a volleyball instantly

yes it's like it's here now and immediately once here you hear like what sounds like you know when like in like space movies when like a spaceship is like travel really fast it stops really like from slowing down you hear like that like the boom and then the tornado sirens come off like this thing just fucking

appeared cosmic just just as a like just when you're watching all these videos you're gonna hear that fucking tornado sirens so yeah so much like every fog

we forgot to mention to um ah Flim Flam it was in the

late we forgot to mention that Mike has a big fat cat

oh now it's like an asshole because it might be in it wasn't this one I don't think we forgot to mention in the blown right by that okay the weather one I believe where it shows a picture of the moon and you hear people screaming?

Oh, yeah. Moon to the big fat kakanin Yeah,

yeah, in the weather one it cuts to like it's like in the other one when it says if you're scared we'll look at it together. It cuts to a picture of the moon and you hear people screaming

Oh yeah, yeah,

yeah, we how do we forget that?

I mentioned that we'd look at it yeah there he did you know at the moon bit I'm that's in weather service. Everybody Shut up. Everybody

can make a goddamn connection here.

Yeah. Good night.

Where was it? Last time we heard anything about like, lunar children.

Oh, Jesus.

In the bedroom. maduras mask bed and drowned is arising the fucking moon called

everything is connected? Nope. Nothing is real.

It is just a construct of human perception.

But that is kind of the end of local 58. Yeah,

it's kind of a real left.

Yeah, it's hard to say if this is gonna keep going or not. I do have a few things I want to add though now that it's kind of over.

We don't want to hear it. Okay, great.

All right. Here's some things that I kind of added in first foremost, like we mentioned, this all takes place in West Virginia. It's Mason County, Virginia. Yeah.

Idaho is mountain Ma,

Idaho. It takes place in Mason County, which is also where the Mothman sightings were

guys if you couldn't tell we are getting into bonus episode gear. Who?

Who man who made these was Chris drop. I think I mentioned this. We mentioned this before, but he made other creepy pastas and stuff. Yeah, they all take place in the same County. So it's starting to seem like all of his stories are connected. What else do you have? Um, I don't know.

Deptford fucking county

never touched on it. We have not done an episode on that salary.

And Doug's gonna be pissed when he sees next week's episode is Deptford county Bert do I know theory

on why all this stuff? I know the theory and why is all this stuff is connected because in one of the local 58 flashcards you see it takes place in Mason County, an icon falls which icon Falls is the location of one of his other stories. So it kind of goes together. I think it's icon anyway. I ch o n john I can like

itchin ditchin

I love I started via no I think you should make I will help you make a theme song

local local fire via local trivia.

Specific to local like for no generally do

this. This is local 58 trivia so now let's look

at a 58 Local Area 58 local 58 trivia,

there's running a running theory that this is kind of like a episode on brainwashing. This whole thing is there's this guy named Tempest that does a lot of like horror stuff. Oh, happier doing this. He kind of like gave his opinion on what all this shit is. And he had Spirit that He pretty much said, Sorry I stroked out law.

He said Pac Man. Yeah,

he pretty much said local 58 might be a brainwashing experiment from the thought Research Initiative, or try to get you to distrust everything you see around you and maybe only trust in what they say

how you missed part of what was going on there. No, I'm

not going to read off the big fat penis. What?

Just so everyone knows I take a lot of the notes and people read them. And sometimes I put things in that I want people to read. Just because

it works like 9%

knows how much of the notes he takes, which is 90% so he's, you know, resorted to fucking with us.

Here's another thing too. That's kind of fun. Another theory, that creature that we see in the fastest route possible video. One of the theories is that it's not even real So hallucination from the driver who might have been following the tapes that the the try the thought Research Initiative gave him so he wouldn't dream and he'd stay awake did they also film Cloverfield they might have oh my god talk about that for a minute I'm going to Marie we talked about going

to you know keep keep fucking going one of the

one of the one of the reasons why people say the creature wasn't real was because in the in the trot that episode where you see made by the try Company A talks about how the real sleep on how they want you to stay awake as much as possible they don't want you to dream so this guy might have been listening to his tapes and I forgot to go back and listen but in this the guy said that you can kind of hear like the audio from real sleep very subtly in that episode as well.

a minute to like realize whose signature that Well yeah, but

it's kind of hard

to read this whole Yeah, this whole thing's like timeframe is kind of funky because the the cartoon makes you think it takes place in like the 30s because it's a 30s style and cartoon and then you get this like broadcast with lyndon b johnson as president signature on it. But in the back of the digital broadcast, this isn't what cognitive is what it was called. You

won't know it. Well. Yes. But yeah, so like, but that was actually something I brought up when we were talking about is that the timeline is kind of funky on this, but it's because they're rebroadcasting things and he's actually see that Yeah, the time like so

here's the thing where that even that theory doesn't hold up too much because that the the cards are signed by Lyndon B. Johnson. But in the background of the cards, is the Apollo 15. Moon Landing which took place after he was president.

Holy shit bike,

so it wouldn't make sense for his presidential signature to be on it. If this happened after Apollo,

is this a multiverse type deal? It might

be where lyndon b johnson kept being president for a bit longer or something didn't kinda like how in watchmen Nixon was president throughout the 80s Yeah, so huh?

was uh, was fucking Bill Clinton apart Oh,

no, this time I really

listened to Gemini you

I'm so envious you guys he just comes naturally and I'm like here I'm trying my fucking heart out I don't fuck but yeah, let's not

get off of the saxophone. Oh this whole thing is amazing. Yeah, the timeframe is kind of skewed but it's supposed to fuck with you and you're the top guys so Suffolk guy time spans and everything and guys,

analog horror. It's fantastic. Yeah, one of the best jobs has its it has hardly any followers right now. Please go find any kind of analog. Honestly, if I'm feeling generous, I might post up this fucking Google Doc that I found that basically tells you every cent what is happening. He's

fluffing my Garfield ease fluffing

your darfield

Yeah, I had to flop them

poor boy. Well, on that note, I think we should Yeah, let's sign

off Thank you everyone so much for listening segway

we only birds bird scooter on home.

Thank you everyone for listening. Visit our link tree link tree comm slash duty pod that's where you're going to find our links to fucking everything even our merchandise in there and our Patreon where you can just all of that so please, you can look us up help Yeah.

groups you can you can

look us up on Google just either Dont Look Under The Internet or delivery pod. You'll find us on everything as well. patreon.com slash Li pod buy me a coffee slash delete pod. We're literally everywhere on

MySpace.

Yes, they were there prominently. I'm in your grandma's DMS right now. But our merchant page doesn't have like a set like good URL just Yes. No, it

does not have a Bitly Yeah, so

the best way to find it is in our link tree. It's the last

10 or on Okay, either the link tree or description. Yeah, every single episode that we put out, we'll have a link to our merge. And Holy shit, Doug. Mike, can we just give Doug a round of applause here? No. I don't want to fucking have to work. Boop. Okay.

That's all for you. soak it in but only for like another two seconds okay shut it down

shut it down but no seriously he he has done such a good goddamn job with the store everything looks fan fucking tastic we have gotten so many orders when it launched yeah but

surprisingly have a lot of orders already Thank you everybody

thank you so much guys like we fucking love you We we want to keep doing this shit we want to yeah

like I said before send us a picture of the last lesson all the quality is if it's up to standards for you awesome if not please do let us know. Yeah and if you want to send us pictures that we can upload on social we'll tag them in and

We make dick on our merge so like you're doing this so you guys can have the merge Yeah, our profits

are the smallest that I think he would let a minimal Yeah, I

will make whatever you want on a T shirt pretty much. Listen, you have a funny quip that we say if you want something specific let me know. I'll fucking make it

I am a fantastic idea. I don't care I don't care either. But listen to me. No, just fucking listen. So bird scooter is a very common phrase on this podcast. You

don't want to segue on a shirt.

I am okay I am torn because I have three separate bird scooter segway designs and I don't know which one should be on a shirt.

Let's make a poll.

That's what I'm fucking saying. Let's do it. I'm gonna post up so I will send Doug the three designs that I have in my fucking folders right now. We'll post them up. We'll see which one you guys like most? Which one do you like most will be a permanent addition to the store. The other two will be limited editions. Oh,

I had an idea I forgot to mention this earlier. If you want your name on a shirt Oh

Yep,

we will I can make like a specialized design specifically for you with like your your name your nickname whatever you want on the back of the shirt and you can order it that way you just have to let us know in the DM

obviously there's there's going to be a bit of an extra cost for that because it's custom

yes and we put things on back of shirts Teespring charges is way fucking more for some reason I don't understand look at our carbon Kentucky shirt yeah that shirt we literally make nothing

on none. I think just 10 cents or something just

to put a fuck Corbin Kentucky on the back of my shirt we make nothing evil font yeah we don't care we're literally putting the merge out for you guys to just have like we're not we're not trying to turn a profit with our merge we just want you guys to have it because a it's hilarious some of the things

would happen today Yeah, guys I I know that this is probably fucking irrelevant to your whole life. But for us you guys showing up and supporting us on our store repping our merge like it means the world to

just show us how much you guys care and also like kissing your dad.

In sucking honesty yes um oh why isn't that a shirt so

we'll get there. Oh one more thing.

We have a lot of

one more thing I want to add real quick is check us or leave us a voicemail on our Google phone number that is 630-909-9366 Please leave us a voicemail if you leave us a voicemail we will play it on the show or text us we will text you back we always do.

We're getting into spooky c 630909366

speaking of that, thank you I want to announce this

I subscribe to our Patreon you can hear my spooky story that I shared prior to that episode. Yes. I won't tell you what it is but I did share my fucked up thing. So absolutely and you will get That with our Patreon guys like what we put out for like on Spotify every week, like that's one thing. If you want to get to know us on a way, way more intimate level

check out our Patreon. Like we're we're in the middle of adding a bunch of shit but right now for every episode that we put out, we put out another episode. That's basically us just like debriefing from from what we just talked about. Yeah, getting

hammered and getting wildly off topic and if you

if you yo god yes, and if you if you like that if you like what we talked about that is not the actual content you are going to love these bonus episodes. So please check us out. patreon.com slash to the pod

disclaimer.

Say hello.

Yeah, our bonus episodes have nothing to do with our regular up there just nonchalant. Some reference we may talk about the episode a little bit but like, what you're paying for is the raw conversations that we're having.

Yeah, we're it's literally like so here's what we do every night. So right after this ends and what like two minutes we are going to talk to each other about all the shit that we fucked up. We're also going to talk about how we could have done better. We're also going to talk about how funny we were and that

happens very rarely are we also heroes

just totally, totally switched on to something completely completely opposite. Oh hey, speaking of

Oh finlays here now, so that's probably the best I would call this an episode. Hey, Miko Hi,

do you want to start or end I'll start I'm gonna shove the

like shut up the noisy bit of a saxophone up your grandpa's butt and then start playing it and see what kind of sound he

makes episode of always sunny that happens they play Dennis like a tuba.

Sure, but I'm talking show an actual sax up his butt and then yeah, let's just see what kind of tunes come out and also love yourself

sexually

Don't you have anything

well you heard you heard you heard that?

Oh yeah family fuck off please. I was second Finley. I love you so much. Finley but please don't bark

if you have a dog or cat pet them because I have cats so I like cats better than dogs but I love friendly penalties amazing. Pretty much take your animal always horniest penises

out

yeah, that's because I was just talking about them

there's a story there.

I regret saying that. But that being said, if you have animals give them a hug give me yes

put your headphones

on their ears. Let them listen to us.

The love it

they will be way more well behaved I

find your cat on my Patreon page I'm you know dying

let's see is Dwayne my dollars.

So I have two cats Dwayne

nicely he could play and he could pay in beard likes

Jason What do you got to say to the people?

Well I would normally say stay paranoid and all that jazz but you guys got me on the animal kick but stay paranoid. Seriously no stay paranoid but if you guys have an animal like share we love with them like Finley is here. Eating Mike's drumstick and that's not a euphemism which is weird but know your animals like your pets they're I know that they're only a part of your life but you are their whole life. Take care of them make sure they're happy

and as that if you can

make them paranoid

do it

yes try to do it

but headphones on them let's see if they can feel fear.

Yeah

your animals incorporated into this

terrible monster that I just said but it's fine.

Well Goodbye everybody. We

love you with a great passion we do and fiddly says goodbye

me slept slap your pain on your asshole.

Yay. Do that head

to get that ongs I have a small urethra a narrow you refer that how you went? There sure

is.