¶ The Prenup Discussion
This is a delicate subject , right ? Everybody me and Renee we don't have a prenup agreement . I take you for all your coins . I tried to get a prenup agreement initially on her , but yeah , it wasn't gonna work .
You didn't have anything me I think there's exceptions to every rule right With you . You didn't have anything .
You didn't have any assets that were worth protecting , so for me it was just going to be an exercise just for the sake of proving a point which didn't need to be proven , whereas if I had someone who had something worth protecting let's say that person was a millionaire that would help to establish the trust to say I'm not marrying you for these things .
All right , y'all .
It's Dr Ne here I'm joined by the one , the only , dr Renee Chair , emeritus of the Student National Medical Association . What up , madam Chair , how you doing .
That's Madam Cher . Remember that was my Madam .
Cher .
Yeah , that was my , Madam Cher yeah that was my tag back in the day I was Madam Cher .
I'm good Of the one and only the famous Student National Medical Association .
Yeah , I'm doing good , rejuvenated every time Easter rolls around , because every week before Easter or that week of Easter the Student National Medical Association has its annual medical education conference and House of Delegates convention . So yeah , Feeling good .
It's a big deal , guys . I'm going to be very honest with you . The Student National Medical Association has been around . Since what year was it you remember better than 1960 , what ?
Oh 1964 .
1964 . This is an amazing organization . Me and Renee were part of this organization when we were students and Renee continued to be to have a very integral role
¶ SNMA Medical Education Conference
as a resident .
When she was in residency she was still , you know , doing a lot of the day-to-day things within the organization and then , even as an attending , renee continues to have a very strong relationship with the folks who continue to run the organization , with the students who are involved , pre-medical students who are trying to get into medical school , and then , by proxy ,
you know , I get involved because Renee is so involved also . So I want to say to everyone that I've been rejuvenated and this year was a great one . So I always say the smaller the town or the more located town . This year it was in St Louis , missouri .
Whenever you do conferences and you go to a conference that's in like Las Vegas , or you do it in New York , or you do it in Los Angeles , or you do it in Florida , right ? Or ?
you do it in Irvington , florida's a whole city .
Oh my bad .
Miami .
You know , when you do it in Miami or Irvington , you know what I'm saying Ain't nobody doing no damn conference in Irvington .
Nii Stop , not Irvington , no , it's an Irvington-y .
Stop .
Not Irvington . No , no , no , okay .
Well , you know what I mean . But when it's really glamorous , glitzy town , people out and about they having fun no-transcript when it's st louis is .
I mean st louis , I guess . I guess st louis ain't as much to do , right , and st louis , we in the conference .
We in the conference , we in the conference and we door dashing and we gonna door dash and we gonna have fun , we gonna have some good barbecue and that's what happened .
Kansas City is more of our weekend .
This year I got a chance to get involved and piggyback off of Dr Love and his wife Dr Uchenna . They did a presentation called what is it they talk ?
about stacking coins how to stack your coins .
Yeah ,
¶ How Doctors Make Money
yeah , and basically it's a talk to the students about how doctors make money , right . So we had a doctor who is an academic physician , how she makes money . Dr Love was talking about how he makes money . I talked about how I make money as a locum tenens doctor . The last doctor was talking about working as a private practice doctor .
She's OB and this was a really good conversation . Dr Love spent a lot of time . Dr Love spent a lot of time creating the presentation and we talked about it a couple of times on the phone . He did a great job , but , as with every presentation at SMA , it's all about the questions . Yeah , it's always about the questions .
The students had a lot of great questions , just a lot of great questions , really , and it just shows you that there is such a dearth of information in medical school that whereby the students , you know , are just not learning this stuff you know , and then they go out , but if you think about it , there's no time .
There's really no time . The way how things are jam-packed in right now , at least in a traditional sense right , you always got to think outside the box to get something done .
So if you always think about things as the priority is learning about the human body , which frankly it is it's going to be tough to throw in a lot of these things , and I think this is where SNMA shines .
This is where whatever organization that has like some type of subspecialty feel to it , that's where they should shine , which is being able to sprinkle these types of information . Why would med students want to hear about this ? Now , right , why would pre-meds want to meet this ? But they all came , which meant that they are interested .
They're really interested in learning about this stuff .
They're really interested to know like and we , we set the barrier of how does each of us make three hundred thousand dollars , and I remember when I went up there , the first thing I said is everybody should remember , should relax and know that whether you're a pediatrician or you're a neurosurgery , you're going to make at least three hundred thousand dollars or have
the opportunity . Yeah , you have that potential three hundred thousand dollars , yeah right , you have the potential to make three hundred thousand dollars and to me . I felt like everybody . I felt like everybody at least the students in the room were like you know like I feel good about this right . I enjoyed it . I really enjoyed it .
I enjoyed talking to them and like the questions we got , like , for example , I kept some notes here Like people were asking what type of business right Should we do LLC , what is an S Corp ? What is a C Corp ? Like this is not us talking about it . These are the students asking us back . They asked us about prenup agreements .
I have to admit that I had to take it personal and talk about me and you .
I wasn't in the room at that point . I had to leave to go to the pre-med luncheon . But yeah , what'd you say , what'd you say ?
Well , I , this is a delicate subject , right ? This is a very delicate subject because so , spoiler alert everybody , me and renee do not have a , we don't have a prenup agreement I try to get a prenup agreement .
I take you for all your coins I tried to get a prenup agreement initially on her , but uh yeah , it wasn't gonna work and you didn't have anything neat . That's the whole premise .
Exactly , but you always stop short of that you always stop short of that ?
No , there's not that I stopped short of it , it's I tried to do it . You said something I'm like yeah , you made sense
¶ Should Doctors Get Prenups?
and that's what I think . So when a student asked this question , you know I gave my answer , which is , between me and my wife we don't have a prenup agreement , and there's multiple reasons why . One is we grew up we kind of grew up like matured with each other , right Like we went to med school together . We went to med school and we didn't have anything .
You had your 1991 Nissan Stanza , I had my Volkswagen Jetta and a lot of student loan debt and that's it . I didn't have a house . I didn't have anything that I wanted to protect . Well , you did have a house and I think you did have a house , but something , the key is something that I wanted to protect that I didn't love Love . Clarify this later on .
He's like you know . One thing to consider when you're getting a prenup agreement is what exactly are you trying to protect the most ? If you had to , if you had to split up and with that being said , between me and you like I didn't have anything- outside worth protecting from you at that point .
Right Like , for example , like , let's say , me and you met and we decided to live in , you know , my parents' house . Let's say , my parents , you know , gave me my house , gave me their house , and decided to give me the house . And we lived it and we fixed it up .
And then it's like well , now , because we get a divorce , like we got to go half on this or are you going to take the house ? Like no , right , that's different , so you know . So from a prenuptial agreement standpoint , the standpoint .
The other thing too is we dated for almost 10 years , so we got to know each other really well yeah really well you know you farting , it fart , you farting in the sleep . I got to learn about all of that , really , you know really too much everybody farts , everybody poops .
It's a good book . An elephant makes a big poop A mouse makes a tiny poop . I don't , I don't fart , you don't poop either . No I do poop , but I don't fart in my sleep . Really Okay , that's what you think .
Anywho , but but . But we got to know each other really well and the other thing is we went to school and we , there was a , there was money that was going between us . There was a couple of times where you fronted me for rent . I just needed help with rent .
There was a couple times where you know I would front you for lunch or dinner or something like that .
Yeah , we never really had I think money problems between us , like if there was never a well , I paid the last time . Why don't you pay Like we just didn't have ?
those discussions ?
No , there wasn't , you know , and we didn't have the type of relationship where I felt like , oh well , you're the guy , so you have to pay . You know , we were just students .
So , no , you never played me like that yeah . I have to admit you never played me like that . I have to admit , you never played me like that . But there are people who are in relationships , who you know . They , for example , they'll . They're in med school , like you . I'm going to say this as women .
Right , I'm sure there are women who are in med school and they're dating someone , or meet someone while they're in medical school who's not a doctor or who is not a med student , who's not in the field . Right , that's tough . Or let's say , you're , you're an attending , you're a doctor and you meet someone who's not in .
You know who's not in medicine , and you've already acquired so many different things . You have your own car , you have your own house . You know , even for men , I mean I , whatever specialty you may want to think of a physician assistant or what have you like there's a lot of things where you just accumulate a lot of things on your own .
Should you sign a prenup agreement ? I don't know . You know it's tough . It's a hairy subject . You want to weigh in on that ? You got anything to say about that ?
I think that you know , I think the prenup .
Here's the pause .
I think the prenup agreement . Listen , I like to meet people where they are right and if someone says hey , like if I were dating somebody let's say I was dating somebody who actually had assets , had accumulated stuff , you know things that they felt like were really important to them , then I might have signed a prenup agreement with that person .
If they brought it up ? Yeah , if they brought it up . Bring the mic a little bit to your side .
If they brought it up , I might have signed a prenup agreement with them , right . But for me it would have been , you know , okay , well , this is something that actually has to be worth protecting , right ? Like if they had , like a trust fund , right , that they got from their parents or something , yeah , I would be like I would have probably brought it up .
I would have probably been like you might want to protect that , because I don't want this to be a point of contention , right , like I don't want this to be a point of contention right , like I don't want this to be a point of contention within the family , but part of the okay , part of things that you said in our when you were besides saying that we ,
that I didn't own anything , part of it was saying you said was look , I don't want to go into a relationship with one leg in , one leg out , so so you said that , right , okay . So if you were to meet someone who had a trust fund or who had their parents' house that you guys are going to live in , why doesn't that apply then ?
Well , because I think that there are exceptions to a rule . Right , I think there are exceptions to a rule and I think that you know , essentially you have to kind of show a sign of trust with you . You didn't have anything worth protecting , so it was like , okay , well , we're , we're doing .
You ain't have , you ain't never going to have people listen to this show with children .
Beat that out , alfred , anyway ,
¶ Shoutout to Podcast Listeners
hey hey , yo shout out to everyone who said what's up to us at the conference . I did not know people would listen . Like right now , behind this camera , is this kitchen , like this kitchenette in this extended stay hotel ? That's who , I think , is listening .
These cups my muscle milk the cabinet , but it's shocking when you have people say , hey , I listened to your show .
And like you know it's just crazy , but go ahead Wait hold on , shout out to the new listeners , shout out , shout out to Ghani Ali , who is at the Medical College of Wisconsin . Alfred , I'm going to show you a little pic of Ghani . I want you to show it . Uh , on this podcast here .
But , um , yeah , I was walking , I was walking into the marriott and he was like dr renee darko and I was like huh , and he's like I listen to the podcast . All the time I was like yeah , I'm gonna shout you out . So there you go , ghani shouted you out , medical college of wisconsin . Cool , dude , cool , but anyway .
¶ Protecting Family Assets
So how do you feel like ? How do you feel with , like the , because we're going to go back to the pre-nup , but I do want to ask you , like , how does it feel to know that I made you into a celebrity ? How do you feel about that ? Excuse ?
me , so let's go back to the pre-nup . So let's go back to the pre-nup , because you bugging . Go back to the pre-nup . I think there's exceptions to every rule . Right , with you . You didn't have anything , you didn't have any assets that were worth protecting .
So for me , it was just going to be an exercise for the sake of just doing an exercise , right , just for the sake of proving a point which didn't need to be proven , and that was that you didn't have anything that was worth protecting , right ?
And for me , that's where it's like listen , I don't want to go to this exercise with you and pretend that we each have things that are worth protecting and that you know this is going to establish some type of trust between us , because it's not .
It actually , I think , is going to be too much of a point of contention between us because we truly we know that we don't actually have anything worth protecting , whereas if I had someone who had something worth protecting let's say that person was a millionaire you know that person had , you know , just lots of stuff for me , I'm like okay , well , I think that
would help to establish the trust to say I'm not marrying you for these things , right , like this is not the reason that I'm marrying you and I understand that these things were in your family and you and your family would like to keep these things within your family , right , and so , yeah , I , I probably would have brought that up myself to say , hey , listen ,
let's sign a prenup , you know , so that you can protect these things , or your family can feel like not so much for the person really , more for the family to feel like these things are protected , not so much even for the person , more for the family to feel like these things are protected , not so much even for the person , you know , because usually it's the
family that gets in people's heads do you think most women think like you ?
because I don't think that many women think like you um , I don't know , but if there's women out there who believe who , who are on what renee's you know , write us in and let us know but , I don't think that many women think like you yeah .
I mean . But you know , I mean , you know me , you know that's something that I would do . I'd be like I'm not marrying you for that .
So really , it's for the sake of the family to feel like the family , you know , and especially if I'm the one that brings it up , if I bring it up first , then I think the family would really then trust that yes , I am marrying this person , because I really just want to marry this person and I don't want to have problems with my in-laws .
I don't want to have problems , you know , with my parents-in-law , my siblings-in-law . I don't want to have problems with these people . So let them just , you know , have that peace of mind that the things that their family worked for is protected , because if it were my family , I would want it protected .
If I were in that situation , I would what's good everyone .
This is Dr Nii Yo . This is the end of this segment . I appreciate you for listening , but this ain't the end . If you want more , go ahead and click the next button on your favorite podcast app Listen . That's next for more banter between me and Dr Rene . That's next for more topics . That's next for more segments Listen . Did you hit next yet ?
Go ahead and click next . Hit it Next Peace .