THE VOTES ARE IN, SO IT'S TIME TO ESCAPE OR DIE! Allana feels the spirit of Avandra. Anne gambles it all on a mad dash. Rinaldo becomes the moose whisperer. Highlights: Just For Spite, Where I Carried You, Freudian Slick, Holocaust Cloak, Democracy Satire, Drop The Hammer, & Half-Canadian Express.
The line between city and monster begins to blur as a terrible and/or hilarious choice is thrust upon an unprepared squad. Allana finally fires a shot. Anne suggests a risky maneuver. Rinaldo proposes a more direct approach. Highlights: Dual-Wield Balls, Spoiler Alert, Crotch Stab, No Bueno, Extrasensory Pancakes, Deeper Is Better, and 1-800-STONEROOT.
Betrayal may be lurking in plain sight, but much larger threats hide below the surface. Allana pokes the goo. Anne relives the first level of Sonic Adventure 2. Rinaldo fights a futile battle against the waves of fate. Highlights: Sad Wolf, Hokey Pokey, Pious Way, The Melon, Let's Run, Botch 'Til I Die, 30-Episode Callback, Freedom Of Movement, and Might Have A Problem.
Eeewww!!! This episode is so, so, so GROSS. Allana does her best not to scream. Anne explores sexuality with a brick wall. Rinaldo wastes all his good rolls and then runs away. Highlights: Chicken Pox, They've Got A Hulk, Heebie Jeebies, Door Voltron, Just The Tip, Friend Or Foe?, and Master Blaster.
Tensions run high as the party desperately looks for any way to stop the evil that threatens to consume Stoneroot. Allana makes a toxicology inquiry. Anne tries to convert a friend one last time. Rinaldo straddles the line between sweet and creepy. Highlights: Part Of Your World, Poke The Orb, Lorde Earlin, Time To Make Magic, Murderer v Traitor, Good Eye Contact, and Six Poisons.
Escaping the sanitarium alive will take everything the squad has at its disposal, including new friends and sweet, sweet pineapples. Allana acts as a tour guide. Anne blurs the line between player and character. Rinaldo enacts a dastardly trap. Highlights: Squirtle Squad, Horcrux & Phylactery, Flavor Text Temper Tantrum, The Ambush Word, In Real-Time, The Doc, Sticky Tongue, and The Strength Contest.
Another back is stabbed, an exposition break becomes a jailbreak, and a truth of godly proportions is revealed. Allana tells a tale. Anne administers aid. Rinaldo takes everything that isn't nailed down. Highlights: Morton's Fork, Time Paradoxes, Halfling & The Idiot, Mean Mean Dagger, Fearow, and Trust Issues.
Our heroes infiltrate the sanitarium to save their friends, but are met with madness and bloodshed. Austin rolls a 12. Johnny rolls a 12. Leon rolls a 12. Jess probably rolls a 12. It's 12 all the way down, folks. Highlights: In The Buff, Professional Curiosity, Kansas City Shuffle, Where We Die, Wasting Spells On Nerds, Erotic Anatomy, and What Happened?
In this mini-episode, the squad searches for their friends as the truth of the rebellion comes into focus. Anne makes it rain. Rinaldo is just, like, so done with this. Highlights: Absconcé, Method Roleplaying, Recently Moaning, Trap Cards, Going Through Her (Loot), and The Convenient NPC.
Two incompetent dorks infiltrate a mansion amidst rising tides of violence, while a mysterious sound fills the air. Allana stays behind. Anne touches a lot of butt. Rinaldo starts a riot and runs across more of his backstory. Highlights: The Mob Rules, Football Sleds, Ambulance Foreshadowing, Chaise Lounge, Evil Omelet, Picking Pockets, and Donnie Darko Tracking.
The city burns as the pieces are put in place for a climactic showdown. Allana oversees some nefarious blankets. Anne sends Marshmallow on a dangerous mission. Rinaldo creeps out his boyfriend. Highlights: Medieval Stealth Technology, Hope Recovered, CTRL F, Ubisoft Map Markers, Sick Moves, and Halfling For Sale.
The dynamic duo does some research while their new friend finds herself at the center of a firestorm. Allana does her best for Faith and Hope. Anne tries to find answers in cryptic conversations. Rinaldo reads the diary of a talented artist. Highlights: Tried So Hard, Free Paper, Don't Burn Anything, Becky, Secret Tuesdays, To The Deer, Superbly Locked, and Follow Your Heart.
Evil lurks in the heart of the city, yet the good may pose a far greater danger.... Allana meets with her big, happy family. Anne spreads the good word (whether you like it or not). Marshmallow goes into overwatch. Rinaldo sees all his plans fall apart. Highlights: Low-Key Pimpin', The Butts Of Light's Landing, Animal. Handling. Check., Orb & Fang, Church Business, and Let's Go Check Out A Book.
Terrible truths are revealed and bad plans are formulated, as time begins to run out. Allana demonstrates proper stabbing technique. Anne encounters a system error and needs to reboot. Marshmallow finds his calling as the world's best pillow. Rinaldo takes a nap and a tumble. Highlights: I WILL NOT, The Stonerotten, Saucy Priest, Blue Screened, Stab Yourself, GrampaSimpson.GIF, and The Confession.
Who will survive the seedy Stoneroot club and what will be left of them? Anne misplaces something VERY IMPORTANT. Marshmallow becomes tug-o-war champion. Rinaldo undergoes some enhanced interrogation. Highlights: Ear-to-Ear, Casino Royale, A Drooling Moron, Allana the Half-Elf Rogue, Ferret Rodeo, and Speak to Squeak.
How will our heroes deal with the shocking revelation that threatens to tear the party apart? Anne gets a makeover. Jayne likes to watch. Marshmallow gets close. Rinaldo starts a dancing sensation that sweeps the nation. Highlights: #MillenialProblems, Blister The Battletoad, Bon Jovi Is Canon, An Inspired Plan, Indiana Rinaldo, and Roll To Bop.
THINGS WILL NEVER BE THE SAME. Anne dreams of flames. Jayne looks for a new gig. Marshmallow becomes Batman. Rinaldo wants someone to ride his pony. Highlights: Cruella de Leon, Cheap Sunglasses, 360 No-Scope, Shiv Him, Come This Gay, and The Secret Session.
The party is split and the fellowship is broken, as our heroes are scattered around a city that wants their heads. Anne has a surprisingly good fire idea. Jayne becomes Brienne of Tarth and/or Captain Phasma. Rinaldo nearly breaks his hand on two separate occasions. Highlights: Vas Preference, Clubfoot Jeff, Candle Business, The OctoWink, Best Worst Puncher, Ice Cube or Ice-T?, Fallon (A.K.A. Falcon), and Candy Cravings.
Things in the quarry go from bad to worse to absolutely ruinous. Anne makes a furry friend. Jayne finally finds her inner Flaafy. Rinaldo throws a temper tantrum. Highlights: Barry Allen's Best Roll, Meet Marshmallow, Maces & Morningstars, Yu-Gi-Bros, The Frustration Fist, and You Are In Trouble.
The party agrees to do a bad thing for bad people because we are easily persuaded and super dumb. Anne tells a dangerous joke. Jayne secures an escape plan. Rinaldo confronts a mysterious figure with ties to his past. Highlights: RPG Violence, This Time It's Personal, Ye Olde Bernie Sanders, The Canadian Fates, Salty Little Grump, and Our Secret.
Everyone's favorite posse investigates The Church and uncovers a deception at the heart of the campaign. Anne flexes her healing hands. Jayne stonewalls an emotional moment. Rinaldo breaks math with his awful rolls. Highlights: Look At Me Not Caring, BioWare Dialogue, Sister Sister, Lying By Omission, ACF, Detecting Magic, and Roll For Exposition.
Our intrepid idiots decide to be competent for once, accomplishing a whole bunch and moving the plot hella forward. Anne issues an arson challenge. Jayne heads for the hills. Rinaldo is a cruel, cruel flirt. Highlights: Paw Punches, The Wolf Is Loose, Future Problems, Frenemies Forever Montage, Do You Ship It?, We're In Star Wars, and Friderick Maps.
A botched rescue mission turns into a life-or-death game of Hide & Seek. Anne contemplates the nature of good and evil. Jayne pushes people into troughs. Rinaldo explains the duties of a mayor. Highlights: Father Carlos, 2 Fast 2 Doge, A-ha!, Jack The Pimp, Medieval Home Alone, The Gillet Question, and Stu The Stew.
The party finally accomplishes something... then immediately screws it up. Anne loses her cool. Jayne pulls off a metal maneuver. Rinaldo interprets a dream. Highlights: For Flavor, Remember The Nards, A Jar, Road Manacles, Plan Horse, One Wolf Moon, Hands-On Rescuing, and Please Don't De-Wolf.
The child wizards turn out to be adult monks, because we are dumb and bad at this game. Anne talks trash. Jayne expands her collection. Rinaldo misses... like, a lot. Highlights: John Cena Rap Battle, Can I Eat Him?, Mr. Senator, The Healing Word, Blinded By The Light, Dark Turn Biscuits, and Gooey Pile Of Things.
Blood gutters and portal doors and leather restraints, OH MY. Anne starts a knife collection. Jayne fails a chuckle check. Rinaldo fulfills a lifelong ambition. Highlights: Mouth Tentacles, Majora's Misdirection, The Grapes of Passage, Creepin' Our Way Downtown, Silent Hill Hole, The Nightmare Room, and School's Out.
It's time to assassinate an old man! Anne goes pyro. Jayne curses the gods. Rinaldo accidentally whips and nae naes. Highlights: Secret D20, The Book Of Faces, Fire & Stabs, Eyepatch Man, Dear Avandra, Medieval Magic Mike, and Foiled By Doors.
The lies continue to pile up as the party does its best to escape a deadly situation. Anne knuckles down. Jayne passes notes. Rinaldo threatens a child. Highlights: The Origin Of Spoopy, Eyebrow-mancy, Secretly Ripped, Intimidation Tactics, Hail Orcus, Blinks 'n' Winks, Low Blows, and Mending.
Bad rolls and worse planning put the party in a potentially lethal situation. Anne becomes The Mouth Of Sauron. Jayne turns into a cat. Rinaldo steals some dirt. Highlights: Rap Critic Cameo, Clockwork Stepford Wives, Beethoven Breakfast, Tattoo Specifics, Uh Oh Spaghetti-O's, The Barnyard Heist, The Roll-Off, and The Abyssal Academy.
Our heroes avoid a party wipe and end up in the most SUSPICIOUS TOWN EVER. Anne runs away. Jayne comes clean. Rinaldo does a hat trick. Highlights: Drunk DM, Once You Pop, WHOOSH, A Halfling Goodbye, Headwear Hullabaloo, Rumbles & Rummaging & Running Away, Filet Mignon From Pottsylvania, Ominous Hors D'oeuvres, and Lucid Cutscenes.
