Delaney Jordan vs. Jupiter Ascending

“The one thing he needed to do to not f__k it up was not be a nonce”

The panel of peril strap on some rollerblades and take to the skies! They go about a bit, you knowwww, before tiring of that nonsense and having a nice sit to watch this week’s film Jupiter Ascending (The Wachowskis, 2015). They are joined by video essayist Delaney Jordan!

Jupiter Jones (Mila Kunis) is an ordinary Joe/Jupiter… or is she? Could it be that she is actually Queen of the Universe?! Yes, she is. Finding herself at the centre of a ancient conflict, Jupiter must rely on allies Caine (Channing Tatum) and Stinger (Sean Bean) if she hopes to survive the attempts on her life by erstwhile Space Pope Balem (Eddie Redmayne).

Watch the trailer here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=THVFkk-sEus

********PLOT SPOILER ALERT********

Balem, from the Abrasax space family, wants to claim Earth as his own and his harvest all of our stuff for himself. Taking in such SF delights as spaceships, space roller blades, space human-animal hybrids, and mass genocide, Jupiter Ascending is fun for all the family and we certainly had a lot of laughs discussing it.

Just what did the panel think of this week’s movie, pray tell? How can they improve upon Balem’s Earth-harvesting scheme? And who will be christened this week’s most diabolical?

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