143. Beyond the Facade of Confidence - podcast episode cover

143. Beyond the Facade of Confidence

Nov 22, 20241 hr 11 minEp. 143
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Episode description

Does the illusion of confidence hold you back from your true potential?

Join us as we confront common myths about self-assurance with humor and honesty. From the art of sushi rolls to the bravery needed for stand-up comedy, we explore how embracing discomfort can help us uncover our authentic selves. Harris shares his personal struggles with that nagging inner critic, while we banter about tattoos and the awkwardness of putting oneself out there. Through lively discussions, we challenge the notion that confidence is about having all the answers—it’s about being true to who we are and wearing that truth proudly.

What role does confidence play when the pressure is on? Through personal anecdotes and a bit of comedic flair, we question whether confidence is an actual skill or just smoke and mirrors. Reflecting on high-pressure scenarios like sports or comedy, we ponder if this elusive trait is the true key to success or more about managing societal expectations. Our conversations touch on how genuine self-belief arises from understanding rather than mere perception, drawing from experiences in basketball and sales that highlight the balance between knowledge and external judgments.

Ready to redefine confidence? We wrap up this episode by challenging the mystical aura that often surrounds confidence, suggesting that it is less about magic and more about knowledge and understanding. Whether discussing the roles of comedians in handling sensitive topics or the importance of practice and self-improvement, we push against the grain of traditional beliefs. With a mix of laughter and insight, we aim to leave you questioning the true essence of confidence and how it impacts personal and professional success.

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Transcript

Mike

On this week's episode , confidence . It's a cop out . It's an excuse you're using because you're too arrogant to actually say like actually I don't know and I want to find out . How do I get better at this so I can become good at ?

Toliy

this , no , but I'm saying that like what you're calling confidence , the way you're describing it . There's a guaranteed way to get it Like to get drunk , Got it .

Mike

Oh no , that's not confidence .

Toliy

That , oh no , that's not confident . That's courage first of all , and that's different Only if you had this confidence , what you're like , hoping for it to arrive to you in , like a magic platter where you're just going to get four sushi rolls of confidence .

Harris

Oh , come on , you are obsessed with the goddamn sushi rolls , man .

Mike

All right , we're live . All right , we're live .

Harris

Before we start , shout out to Eldar , who's currently on the mend , man .

Mike

Yeah , okay , you got some words for him .

Harris

Words of wisdom . Get better man .

Mike

Yeah , yeah , we need you . Yeah , all right , so , harris . So Anybody has a topic they'd like to discuss ? We talked about it . Yeah , we're doing it . Did you talk to Tully about the topic ? Did you tell him about it ? No , he gonna find out right now . Alright , well , harris , introduce the topic then first off .

Harris

How do you spell topic ? Oh , fuck you , man , I know how to spell it . You ain't gotta fucking do this every time . T-o-p-i-k . You introduced the topic , man . Well , the topic is something I have trouble with .

Mike

Well , to be straight up , I'm just going to call it confidence . Yeah , okay . So the topic today is confidence and , harris , tell us why you wanted to discuss this topic well , we had the conversation in the car .

Harris

We did have a conversation in the car . We were talking about the car review and how totally he says you know this shit , it's in your head . Well , I opened up to Mike . I didn't open up to you . How does that make you feel ? Well , first off , I didn't say that you know this shit , it's in your head . Well , I opened up to mike .

Okay , I didn't open up to you . How does that make you feel ?

Toliy

well , first off , I didn't say that .

Harris

You know this shit well , you know , a lot of this shit is what you keep saying .

Toliy

Okay , you know something , yeah , but you don't take the time to to educate yourself so you actually understand ?

Harris

it . Even if I know all the shit and a lot of the shit , there's still the voice in the back of my head . That's impossible .

Toliy

What ? It's impossible , man . What's impossible , man , it's impossible for you to actually understand . Well the shit .

Harris

I do the shit I do know . Okay , there's still the voice in the back of my head that doubts .

Toliy

the voice is only there , cause you don't actually know .

Mike

So why don't we start with defining , or what we think is the , the definition of confidence ? What is that actually ? When you say confidence , what does that mean ?

Harris

holding myself back . What does that mean ? All right , so doing shit , right , mm-hmm , like even on the videos , right , the sales calls , mm-hmm . What they suggested was doing a lot of uncomfortable things . Okay , you know stuff you're not comfortable with , whether it be the ice dunk , ice plunge yeah , the plunge , okay .

Whether it be what I want to do , going to New York a little stand-up comedy , oh shit , put myself out there a little bit , mm-hmm . Actually , zeke , who was here last week , suggested a way for me to be able to do that .

Mike

Mm-hmm .

Harris

He said to pretend I'm busting your guys' balls when I'm doing it right . Okay , because I said you know I couldn't do it in front of those people and you know she goes , just pretend you're busting at you know Mike's Eldar's , you weren't here , but your balls .

Toliy

Why do you want to bust balls ? Yo , why do you got to do ?

Harris

that , bro , Bust balls means fucking talk shit . What's with you and balls ? Yo , why do you gotta make it so fucking weird , bro ? Just saying you were talking about cream .

Toliy

From behind , I got a fucking tattoo on my back , bro .

Harris

I put cream on it . It heals the tattoo . I don't know , man . You don't got a tattoo , so you can't even talk about this stuff . Disqualified , disqualified . Don't got a tattoo , so you can't even talk about this stuff . Disqualified , disqualified . Pack your shit up , man . How do you spell disqualified ? Listen , man , we're having a serious conversation here .

This is serious shit . I have to do more uncomfortable stuff but how does that define confidence ? So confidence right , like if somebody asks you what does confidence mean ?

Mike

I don't know . Is confidence like .

Harris

Would you consider that courageous ?

Mike

Courageous .

Harris

Well , do you think confidence is like courageous , is like more like Confidence , being able to get the will to actually ? I guess , put yourself out there , I guess you could say right . Well , confidence is like , like maybe totally , you can be able to put yourself out there how you can tie the definition of putting yourself out there .

I'm not talking about what you think I'm talking about , either .

Toliy

I don't even know what you're saying right now .

Harris

Man focus , man put yourself out there .

Toliy

What yeah , but what is putting yourself out there ?

Mike

and confidence like I think what Harris is trying to say is by putting yourself out there . Is that being confident is being okay with showing yourself who you are and not being scared of it Putting yourself out there .

Harris

Presenting yourself who you are . This kind of goes back to our podcast last week . Oh , because we talked a little bit about it . Okay , that you know I don't have the confidence to be myself like I'm in here , out there . Okay , because I fear that . You know , like I said last week , I'm going here , mm-hmm . Out there . Okay , because I fear that .

You know , like I said last week , I'm gonna offend some people , but I feel that you can offend some people ?

Mike

are you gonna feel that they're gonna judge you and they're not gonna accept you ?

Toliy

well , you , you don't feel you're gonna offend some people , please ? Yeah , I do .

Harris

Stop it , please right if I go to a bar . I was talking about it . Even John said he goes . You know , we talked about it . He goes the way you say , like if you be yourself and you're at a bar and you're trying to have a little fun with people around you , the way you say , oh , fuck , you is not an offensive way .

Yeah , because you have a smile , but I am not myself out in public like I am in here . We talked about it . I put on a , I don't know , would you call it a guard , a shell ?

Mike

Yeah , like a magic cloak .

Harris

Yeah , you know , I don't you know I don't do it around my dad . I don't do it around my dad . I don't do it okay around . I've done it around my brothers . Some of them don't like it , you know , but uh .

Mike

So which one feels more natural to you then , being the person you are here or the person you're out there ?

Harris

it's more enjoyable , this one in here can you tell , tell us why this one is more enjoyable . I don't know . I guess I'm more of myself . I don't know I'm able to be . I guess the jokes they're just all natural you know and I feel good being able I don't know to light up the room a little bit , but out there I'm more hesitant .

Mike

But why do you feel and I don't know if the word is confidence why do you feel more confident or more okay with presenting this image ?

Harris

Because I know people in here right , they're not going to . I guess , like you said , judge me , they're going to understand . You know it's just me being myself . You know being funny a little bit , but people out there , I don't know , it's like I'm worried they're not going to understand . You know that it's not me being offensive , it's me being myself .

Mike

Okay .

Harris

So it's like when I take the calls I put on a persona hmm , so you're acting , that's why let's play called acting . Yeah , that's well .

Mike

I called the last time . You're acting out of character of who you truly are . Yeah , I don't know how to mix .

Harris

We talked about this Mix , who I am into my calls Like Eldar , suggested several times to throw some jokes into the thing , but , like I said , I don't even know if I do any friendly fucking jokes .

Mike

You don't know if you do any like PC shit . Yeah , because a lot of my shit is like rated R .

Harris

Yeah , you can't go . Oh , fuck you , you know .

Mike

You could say , like are you out , your goddamn mind , though I can't say that , bro , like that's .

Harris

I'll be out the door in a minute , bro . Okay . Yeah , this guy here is watching me like a hawk . If we're doing a call review and I go , you got your goddamn mic . It's going to look really bad .

Mike

Well , you're not necessarily have a director towards the person you're talking to , but if you can use some of those things and you know your jokes which may be like you say , maybe a little edgy .

Harris

So what I'm coming down to is I put on , I guess , my acting hat when I go out in public and when I'm Does it feel good to do that ? No , because you know it doesn't feel like myself , because I'm a funny guy . No , crispy , Sorry about that , Because I don't know .

Mike

So it feels unnatural . When did you discover this thing , that you are an actor ? I'm gonna say new york dude in new york . Yeah , what happened in new york ?

Harris

I was you know this , I guess you could say polite trying to be like the clean cut guy , nice jewelry boy , yeah , which is we all know , that ain't me , that ain't me , yeah . But when I got the beers into me it started coming out yeah the drunken phase .

Mike

Okay , but that's what they say . The liquid courage yeah , the drunken phase Okay .

Harris

But that's what they say . There's that liquid courage . Yeah , because when you get drunk , enough you lose the sense of giving a fuck .

Mike

I think , yeah , I think a lot of people , you know , feel more confident after having a couple of drinks . They can do whatever they want , say whatever they want . They overestimate their abilities , you know , talk crazy shit , you know . And .

Harris

I'm able , you know and I remember everything about that night , like I was not blackout drunk , but I was drunk enough that I was just letting loose . After two beers you felt like this no . I had five shots and five beers .

Mike

How many years ago ?

Harris

was this . This was when I took Crispy to New York , man , last week . No , man , it was months ago .

Mike

So you just found out that you're an actor . Just six months ago it came to fruition , yeah , okay , I'm not sure if you know what that word means , but okay .

Harris

Well , I mean , I found it out bro .

Mike

You discovered it ? Yeah , okay , all right Because .

Harris

I put on the persona for so long that I kind of felt natural .

Mike

Tol , you have anything to add ?

Harris

Anything about what he's saying um I mean , we still haven't defined confidence . Confidence , or should we get a dictionary ?

Toliy

um , you want to take a stab at it , man ? Is that good ? Well , yeah , I . I also don't know if , like , if alcohol provides you with confidence , because I feel like to have actual confidence . I feel like it's like backed behind something you know . I feel like the alcohol might like break another barrier um , but the confidence .

Mike

Does confidence have a requirement ? That it's , let's say , truth , rooted in the truth ?

Toliy

Real confidence yeah .

Mike

Real confidence . Okay , Harris , real confidence . We're going to talk about real confidence now , but generally people use confidence without the truth behind it .

Toliy

Well , I think it's probably just misdefined . It's not properly like used .

Harris

So what you're saying is what I'm talking about is not properly using confidence well , like you haven't defined it yet . I'm describing it , man .

I think confidence is I don't have the confidence to do that , right , yeah , but like when you say you don't have the confidence to do that right , yeah , but like when you say you don't have the confidence that like are you .

Toliy

I don't know if it's fear but do you actually believe that you have the abilities to what like ? Are you like in in whatever ? Okay , so name me one thing that like if you had confidence and you'd be able to do it . You're talking about the calls , right , yeah , okay , so you're saying that what you're missing with the calls is just confidence .

Well , a little bit's knowledge . Well , I don't know about a little bit . I think a lot of it .

Harris

The whole point is Fix the mic . The whole point is , I feel I , like I said , have that voice in the back of my head .

Toliy

Yeah , but why do you think that that voice like , like , why do you think that voice exists ?

Harris

I don't know .

Toliy

Well , why do you think ? I don't know Fear , I don't know , yeah , but like , do you think that ?

Harris

it's not like I can't ask the voice , bro . It doesn't talk back , man no , it talks back . Okay , voice why do I have this ?

Toliy

it's not answering bro , well yeah , but when you live life , it talks back to you , you know what you're saying is I'm not living life .

That's not what I'm saying , I'm saying that , um , I think that voice exists in any kind of thing , that someone is lacking in something for a reason Right , and I think that once you back it with real knowledge and education and understanding , then that voice goes away .

Harris

Okay , you say that for the sales , right ? Well , I'm saying that for anything . So you're saying right , for the sales , right ? Well , I'm saying that for anything . So you're saying right , you're saying right , let's go back to being myself in public . Okay , you're saying the same thing for that . Yeah , for anything , for anything .

Mike

Yeah , yeah , like , can you like ? When you asked me confidence , right , when you guys started saying it , I had to ask myself okay , what am I confident in about my own abilities , right ? So what are you confident in your own abilities that you're confident you could do , could be anything . That's fucking hard .

Toliy

I'm confident that you can eat four sushi rolls for dinner .

Harris

It was not four man . I'm just saying that . I'm confident that you can eat .

Toliy

It was three and man , I'm just saying that I'm confident that you can eat them . It was three and a half . Am I confident that you can eat 40 sushi rolls ? No , I'm not . I have no confidence in that .

Mike

Do you feel like , do you think that confidence is something that's also tied to something that you're good at as well , like , if you're good at it , are you going to be confident ? Yes , absolutely Totally .

Harris

If you say no , I'm going to smack you . Well , yeah , but I think confidence , confidence , like so you say yes to that , but you're saying the stuff that you're bad at has nothing to do with not having confidence Stuff that you're bad at .

You're saying yes when there is confidence , when you're good at something , but when we're talking about we're bad at something , it has nothing to do with confidence . That's basically what you just said .

Toliy

I'm saying that I think it's hard for you to give me an example of things where , like , you actually like have it Right , like have confidence , yeah , but then like no , no , you actually have the ability that you're talking about , but you're just missing this mysterious confidence thing .

That's like this mystical word Right , or mystical feeling , and if you just had it , then you would be able to do what you're talking about Right . And I'm and I'm saying name me something that you're in that position , right .

I have to think , cause I don't think there's a lot of things Like for example , like , for example , with me , right , um , if we're like in the gym or playing , like you know , pick up basketball back when I was much younger , right , um , I could go and I could make my shots and do that .

And then there was sometimes in like league games or high school games or whatnot , where it was difficult for me to do that , and he could say that like hey , like why , why , why is that Right ? Like , like why , why ? And he could say that like hey , like why , why , why is that Right ?

Like , like why , why didn't you say , well , hey , when the lights are the brightest , people struggle to perform , or that it's difficult , and I don't know if they lack confidence .

I just feel that , like they have another variable that is um more important to to them , right , that is like preventing them from like being themselves , for example , or like doing what they're , or or like using an ability , like there's something that they value more in that moment .

It's probably like one , like one of the more more popular ones is probably like what others will think about the situation , or what others feel about them , or what . Like , yeah , like , um , the opinions of other , of of others , um , what others will tell , will . Will , will say about you to behind your back . Behind your back or to other people .

Mike

Right . So with your example , totally the basketball one , I think , is really good You're . You're a very good shooter when it's not let . You're a very good shooter when it's not , let's say , in a game like , when it's like not a league game or whatever . Right , You're much more .

Toliy

Well , well , no , like I , I I don't feel like I have that problem anymore Really . Like I mean like as , as of late , I was just more like out of shape .

Oh , for example , there was I struggled a lot with doing that and then Elder kept pushing me in the game so like shoot , shoot and , like you know , do that , and then I felt like I broke that and then I felt like I had a lot of success afterwards in it .

But I don't know if it was like a confidence issue or was I fear , like I was more fearful as to the consequences of my actions or my shots potentially , or what others would say about them , or like it being too far , or like too many attempts , or like what would happen if I miss .

You know stuff like that , right , so I was more prioritizing those kinds of feelings and thoughts than like my own actual game and like , maybe , the reality of the situation .

Mike

But did those things like if you're a good player right on the regular thing and then you weren't good outside of it was those things that you described . The nervous anxiety being judged was those things . Then what ? How did they take away from your confidence ?

Toliy

no , I , so I , I almost like the way I'm thinking about it now is almost like , confidence is like in a uh irregular like , not not irregular a uh irrelevant like , uh like thing . Because , um , it's not that I was missing confidence , it's that I was prioritizing other variables like the ones I was just describing . That is actually what I was doing .

So there was no confidence involved , Well yeah , I just feel like the way we use confidence is that it's like this , like mystical kind of thing , right , and people just feel like , hey , if only I had the confidence then I would be successful .

Like this , like mystical kind of thing , right , and people just feel like , hey , if only I had the confidence and I would be successful . Right and they kind of like leave the power of this like unexplainable , like force . Right , we're like wow , like he had the confidence and like now he's able to do that . Like I don't know if it works , so confident .

Harris

I feel like . I feel like what totally ?

Toliy

saying is the word confidence doesn't mean shit . I think confidence is dead man .

Harris

Yeah , I feel like him describing all that , which is true , right when I want to talk about , um , not being able to go . You know , be my , I guess , true self out there . Yep , most of it is what he said that you're afraid people are going to talk behind your back . You're , you know they're going to say some shit , you know .

Toliy

Yeah , the , the , the the society that we live in and , just like , naturally , like , uh , grow up in like , like , until we start thinking more . Um , there's a very high probability that the opinions of others will um be very important to how we feel about things . We're just killing words , man .

Harris

Opinions of others will be very important to how we feel about things .

Toliy

We're just killing words and and and and lots of times it's I mean , it's definitely something that holds a lot of people back , including myself on on on various things , right , but then I think that once you get to a point where you have an undeniable truth , then I don't think that you need like you're not gonna like search for this like mystical term of

confidence or this like , or you're gonna care of what others say . You're just gonna do what you have to do , and people will call that like oh , he knows his shit , or oh , he's confident . Like they're going to like like it's something that others could label you as that because that's their observation of it , but maybe it's just their .

They just don't understand that you actually have the truth , for example , or something along those lines . It's just like people , I think , use that word and they label it in particular things , but they might be mislabeling the way it actually works . I think use that word and they label it in particular things , but they might be miss like a labeling .

Mike

Um well , yeah , they're using confidence cause they don't understand what's actually happening .

Toliy

Yeah , cause I I feel like again , I don't know what situation you could tell me where it's , like like someone's actually good at something , for example , and like like they actually believe that that , and then they just like you're just like , oh man , if only you had confidence , like you'd be able to do that .

You know , like any situation , I think you're going to find something that someone doesn't actually have the truth or they're actually prioritizing something else , right ?

Mike

like Harris right now . Who's on his phone ? Yeah , like Harris , but when I was not gonna judge , him's a safe zone and he knows it .

Harris

I'm searching something up here .

Mike

What Hold on ? How many bull testicles can you fit in your mouth ? Oh my God , that's weird man . I'm confident it's six . Yeah , I think you could do six Okay , so confidence .

Harris

I'm going gonna ask a question here . Yeah , oh okay , using chat gbt . No one of our is confidence , the word dead , you'd like to bury it ? Well , it sounds like totally is stating it's dead . Right , it's . It's this magical word . It's this magical word that really doesn't mean what people think . It means just like trust I .

Toliy

I think that this if you know something right and then you actually perform that in the outside world and in whatever it is right , someone's gonna label you as oh , you're confident okay , in thing , they're going to put that judgment on it . So is that ?

Harris

the right judgment .

Toliy

That's their observation of it . But the reason I'm saying that I think it's dead , is that because the way at least I'm thinking about it now , or like or , Confidence sounds like it's , so not being confident is just you're living in fear .

Mike

You cannot , you cannot be actually . You yourself cannot call yourself confident or not confident . The other people can say that , but you cannot call yourself because it's not the proper . So confidence is not , it's not the proper word to use towards yourself so it's like .

Harris

So it's another thing everyone in the world are wrong with saying People can say it , but I'm not actually sure yeah no , no , but you shouldn't use that in your own thing is what I'm getting at .

Mike

Well , I just feel that like it's giving you yourself the wrong impression . Yes , that's for sure . It's like a short person saying that I'm confident that I could dunk right , it doesn't mean anything .

Harris

Okay , because I just want to read something here . Okay , list the definitions of what you consider of confidence yeah , my man , just do it .

Mike

A definition of confidence . I think we were trying to do this for the past 30 minutes . Let's see if we confidence is , I probably would say , some kind of belief in yourself the last one is exactly what ? Basically totally has been explained for the past 10 , so it's a bunch of bullshit no , it's not .

Harris

It's like it's a tricky word one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities .

Mike

Yeah , but when you don't have it , then you don't have the appreciation of your own abilities because they don't exist .

Harris

Yeah , so if you don't have confidence , so if you don't have confidence , it's like a wash , it's like you're living in fear .

Mike

Yeah so it's fear . It's not confidence . There's nothing actually .

Toliy

It's not confidence , it's not that you're living in fear , it's just that you don't actually like know what you think that you , you know you're , you're , you're under the wrong impression of what's actually happening and confidence .

I just feel like , like like the way that you were using it , for example , and like a lot of people uh use it , is that like to them internally it almost sounds like a good excuse to have , right , like hey , if I had confidence , I would crush these calls .

Or like , hey , if I had confidence , then I would be able to go into that like uh , um , like a comedy club and do stand up , right .

But because you don't have it , that makes it okay for you to just like continue living out who you are , because , only if you had this confidence which what you're like hoping for it to like to arrive to you in like a magic platter right where you're just gonna get four sushi rolls of confidence oh , come on , bro , man , come on .

Harris

You are obsessed with the goddamn sushi rolls , man . You're obsessed with it , man , I'm just saying you're obsessed with it , right so like it is six o'clock and he might be hungry yeah are you hungry ?

Toliy

I am hungry actually , yeah , so , so so it's like , yeah , people are just kind of what they're waiting for confidence to arrive to them , and I , and just the way I'm hearing it , is that it just sounds like a good reason for you to not progress yourself or not to learn or not to like educate yourself .

Mike

No , the thing is , you use confidence when it's probably like a probably a confidence . Saying that you lack the confidence is an arrogant statement , sounds like to me , because you're saying that you don't have something , but you're actually not actively pursuing to find out and you want to just say , oh , it's magic .

Harris

So you're basically saying grow a pair of fucking balls and try it ?

Mike

No , no , I'm not saying that . I'm saying that you thinking you have an ability to do something Right Because you think you have the knowledge . And yeah , yeah , I mean for sure knowledge , but there's definitely other things which I think are interesting to find out .

Don't like that phrase again , man , but you're lacking the knowledge and other things in order to do that which you think you'd like to do . So if it's sales calls , if it's you know , I don't know being a good at something , it's confidence is like a , it's a cop out .

It's an excuse you're using because you're too arrogant to actually say like , actually I don't know and I want to find out . How do I get better at this so I can become good at this ? So what we're saying is you're a dum-dum , thank you .

Harris

I really appreciate it .

Toliy

You're welcome , but no one gives a shit man . There's a guaranteed way to get confidence Guaranteed .

Harris

I thought you just said , confidence is a cop-out man .

Toliy

No , but I'm saying that what you're calling confidence .

Mike

The way you're describing it .

Toliy

There's a guaranteed way to get it Like to me Get drunk , got it .

Harris

No .

Mike

What did you ?

Harris

say Get drunk .

Mike

Oh no , that's not confidence , that's courage first of all .

Toliy

And that's different and that's probably , you know , different topic no-transcript , because in that thing , at that moment , you are the man like you , you understand that like you , you are , like , you get it , which will , will , when you like , speak and you articulate and you talk about that thing , you're going to be viewed as a confident person .

But I don't think people who are like if , if you want to use confidence in that kind of way , who are , who are like if , if , if you want to use confidence in that kind of way , who are , who are like you , view as like , oh , they're confident . I don't think they themselves are using confidence to be confident .

I think they're using knowledge and then they're displaying in a particular way , um , and then they're . They're doing that also Like , I think , whenever someone's viewing someone else as confident , um , someone's viewing someone else as confident , they probably I'm not sure if that's for sure always in all situations , but they're probably lacking in that thing .

That's why they have that observation , I think , to begin with did you understand anything ?

Mike

yeah , so what do you think ?

Harris

I get where he's coming from , right . Okay , it's a cop-out .

Mike

Yeah . So what do you think ? Why are you using that excuse ? What are you , let's say , afraid of , or scared of whatever ? What's stopping you from being successful ? Let's say I don't know , you don't know .

Harris

That's something I got to think of .

Toliy

Yeah , but if you actually agreed that confidence is dead , I think you would know .

Harris

I don't know if I can label it as fear .

Mike

Well , you definitely have mentioned you're scared of how people are going to perceive you on the phone , right yeah , but that's how I felt like you definitely can't be confident there .

Harris

I originally felt like that went away , but it didn't . I get that .

Mike

Thank you Thank you , so you had a false sense of confidence .

Harris

yeah , okay so what are the things ? Thank you . Thank you for that . For what ?

Mike

and yeah , thank you , hit the vape man , it's all gonna be all right , man , so say so . What else , harris , what do you think ?

Harris

stop making that . I gotta take a shit face .

Mike

So do you agree with what he's saying ? Yeah , I mean , you actually are fearful of how people are going to perceive you . Sure , yeah , anything else ? How people are going to perceive you ? Sure , yeah .

Harris

Anything else , maybe a little bit more knowledge .

Mike

So you think you don't have enough information or knowledge about that which you're trying to discuss with the person .

Toliy

See , I feel like also in these kinds of things , like it's , it's , it's very much like a perception base . He perceives it as like , for example let's just give an analogy like 80% is feeling of what others will feel about him . And that may be 20% , like a knowledge what is that supposed to mean .

Out of the 100% of what's going on , 80% of it is your fear of how others will perceive you or think about you or what they might say so , how do ? you knock that down . No , I'm saying , this is your perception of what's going on . And then there's knowledge which is like a 20% right . This is how you're perceiving it , right .

Mike

Yeah , when you say I'm more like 60-40 .

Toliy

Okay , 60-40 , where , like for me it's probably like 99 to 1 .

Mike

About knowledge , about what though ?

Harris

About cold calls . Is what he said ?

Mike

No , but is he lacking the knowledge of the actual product , the stuff that he's selling ?

Toliy

Anything associated with the sales . I know he's lacking knowledge . Well , he he's lacking not like to me , it's 99 knowledge and an understanding base because , um , if he had that there , that couldn't be a fear of what others will will think about you over the phone Because you actually have the knowledge . There's nothing that others can think about it .

Harris

Let's put it this way Me and him were rehearsing the cold call today and I had let's say , I knew our use cases . The problem is I don't say it in the right fucking way .

Mike

Totally . Is he correct in what he's saying ?

Harris

Totally , it's like an interrogation .

Toliy

Yeah , but the thing is he understands some of the use cases , for example , Right but no , sorry , he remembers some of the use cases .

Mike

Okay .

Toliy

Right , but he does , but he's not able to , to um , to articulate , to , to , to show people that he understands it . It's because he does not understand it himself , so he relies .

Harris

He relies very heavily on remembering Right .

Toliy

He relies very heavily on remembering right .

But the issue with people , which is a majority of people that you speak to , they will give you many objections , right , especially as you speak to people that are more difficult to talk to , and objections are like the cancer to memorizing things , because anytime something goes off script or not the exact way that it was remembered to go , you will find that he

will struggle every single time because of that . But if he understood it , then it doesn't matter where it goes , it doesn't matter who says what , it doesn't matter what questions are asked , because you go into the conversation with a bazooka , with every machine gun , with unlimited ammo , with unkillable full Kevlar and vests and everything .

There's nothing that anyone can say or do that will be able to knock that . Because you actually understand it , then it becomes not nerve-wracking at all and like very easy and very , very smooth and like it doesn't like there there's no fear of what others will think about you because like you actually , for example , know what you're talking about .

Um , so they'll only benefit from speaking with you potentially , or or they'll just be ignorant and like not want to learn , for example , and then like that's also fine , right , um , but um , yeah .

Mike

So what do you ? What do you say for yourself , harris ?

Toliy

Did you hear ?

Mike

anything you said , or you were busy .

Harris

Sorry , I was looking at my email . I got an email requesting pricing . Oh well , big shot .

Mike

Busy guy Okay , so you didn't hear anything . He said no , do you want to hear anything ? Yeah ?

Harris

I'm not sure . Well , you know what Fuck you . That's fair or anything , yeah , okay , I'm not repeating it . I'm not sure that he's . Oh well , you know what Fuck you . Okay , all right , that's fair .

Mike

He just I can give it to you if you want . He just said you're a dumb , dumb .

Harris

Thank you very much . Love you too , brother .

Mike

Yeah , he's saying that you actually don't have the knowledge and you're just using your memory to do shit . Instead of understanding the like . Let's say something simple , like the use case . You can just regurgitate information to me , but if I start asking you more in-depth questions about it , you have no idea . Do you understand what I just said or no ? Yo man ?

Why are you taking your shirt off ? Man ? Yo whoa whoa . This is a podcast . Oh , fuck you . Okay , fine , so does that make any sense ?

Toliy

I also just realized the way that you're sitting right now , like the angle of your head . You look like you have a cone head . I knew you were gonna start something else with this .

Harris

like you have a cone head , I knew you were going to start something else with this . Okay , you have a natural cone head , are you ?

Toliy

done , man .

Harris

They're making a second movie man , what movie man , the Coneheads man . I never watched it . Oh , you gotta watch the first one . What ? The fuck are you talking about Beldar ? Is the main character Beldar ? Yeah , as in , like Eldar Beldar ? Yeah , eldar's in a movie , yeah , yeah .

Mike

So , harris , do you agree with what Tully was saying ? Sure , did it make sense . You motherfucker , are you drunk or are you tipsy ? Yeah , are you tipsy . You're an ass , bro . I thought you were confident about your body , man .

Harris

Oh my god , what Okay , you want me to be confident about my body ? Whoa yo .

Mike

He's really digging the shirt off . Thank god there's no video on it , man .

Harris

Are you gonna keep making ?

Mike

fun of my laugh man . So so , harris , do you agree that that what he's saying ?

Harris

yeah , I guess , okay so I mean , I can name it looks uh , you know you can regurgitate information I I can like , yeah , Speak into the mic . Is that good ? Yeah , perfect .

Mike

I don't think I'm going to get drunk off a warm beer . Man , I'm not drunk . You're tipsy , though no .

Toliy

You're tipsy .

Mike

He's tipsy 100% .

Toliy

Look at the way he's behaving , bro . I'm not tipsy , bro , you're a caged animal .

Harris

I've been a bro . I'm about to have a caged animal .

Mike

Who just got a cage animal , bro , all my life hunt fishing smoking every day that's right , okay , so confidence is you can't say it's dead .

Harris

It's fake news .

Mike

Can't say it's dead , though based on the way that generally people use it .

Harris

It's dead true confidence so we're saying that the definition of confidence that even the internet says is complete bullshit ?

Mike

no , the thing is they're not like belief in yourself . Right , it's , a lot of people can believe in themselves , right , but that belief can either be true or false , right ? They're not saying that ? Hey , it's a belief in yourself . That actually is the truth . If yo , if you're confident , yo , my man , yo , what are you doing , man ? What the hell ?

Harris

the hell Rubbing the tattoo man .

Mike

If you believe in yourself , right that , if you're confident that you can dunk , if you can't dunk , that confidence is not going to get you anywhere , no , you know . So it has to be in line with the truth in order for it to actually make sense .

If you're confident that you're good at sales or you're good at something and you can actually produce those results , right then that is confidence . But I don't think you need to say that it's just you're good at it and you somebody else can say , yeah , he's , you're confident about it .

Toliy

But it's like you have the belief in yourself and you're acting out of that belief and the results they speak for themselves same same thing with with like this being funny thing right , like if you actually believe that you're actually funny and that you would bring value to people's lives with like , like you know , or or like like , uh , like yeah , if you really

felt that you were funny and you had um and like this is the reality of this situation and you knew how to deliver it properly , I think that you would easily be able to do the like . What do the top comedians do ? Like I don't know , like Dave Chappelle , they make fun of what ? Like racists and religions and like transgenders .

I think I would be more they cross over the line to the max .

Harris

I think I would be more close to Matt Rife .

Toliy

I'm just saying Nobody cares they cross over all those lines , those PC lines that people do . Right ? You saying fuck you to somebody is worse than that , right ?

Harris

if that's the case , then there's no way that offending people is like the reason why you don't do that like you , okay , then we gotta go to new york , like I said , I just want to find out first this is my question from before what do you think you're good at ?

Toliy

before what do ?

Harris

you think ? You're good at , you can't say choo-choo yourself , making people laugh , making people laugh .

Mike

I make you guys laugh every day .

Toliy

Okay , I don't know if you're making us laugh .

Harris

Whoa . What is he trying to say ? He's got to take it away , bro . He's got to take everything away from me . Why is he trying to put you down like that man ?

Mike

He's got to take it away , bro , Like he's got to take everything away from me .

Harris

Yeah , why is he trying to put you down like that man ? He's got to take everything away from me . He can't even give me one thing in my life , man .

Toliy

So you're good at making a couple of people laugh .

Harris

I'm good at making several people laugh , man . Every guest we brought in here thought I was funny and brought in here thought I was funny and don't just say , oh , they were just saying that to make you feel good , fuck you man , oh , fuck you oh , fuck you man , fuck you . Stop using my terms . So you're gonna go with you're good you're going to go with .

Mike

you're good at making people laugh . Yes , Do you disagree ? I'm not sure what that means making people laugh . Do I think you're funny ? I do think you're funny , but I'm not sure that's the same thing as you're good at making people laugh .

Harris

Do I make you laugh ?

Mike

Yeah , I mean , I definitely laugh when you say certain things , yeah , I do , okay , yeah , but how do you know if you're good at it , like like , I think like your funniness is contingent on us , not on yourself .

Toliy

If you could do it on your own and you did it like left and right with people , then I would say that you'll be good at making people laugh , but like I can make myself laugh by extracting particular things that's why I'm saying take it to the comedy club and see if I can do it sure , but why would you want to potentially , like make a fool out of

yourself ? There's no chance you could do it . I always feel so negative .

Harris

Yeah , you're always negative , bro , I'm not negative man .

Toliy

You gotta be positive man . That's exactly what you need . You need confidence , man . It sounds like . If only you had that .

Harris

Fuck you , man . You gotta be positive . All right , this guy man .

Mike

Why are you gripping that mic man ? You're doing weird stuff .

Harris

I'm not gripping the mic . Why are you gripping that mic , man , you're doing weird stuff .

Toliy

I'm not gripping the mic don't stroke it like that man fuck you man three guys , well , two guys in here at least what is that show , charlie Sheen ?

Mike

two and a half men .

Toliy

Oh , fuck you man you're like half man , half walrus you .

Harris

How many things are you going to fucking say now that I look like and I ? Know man you keep evolving man . Evolving down is what you're basically stating , man evolving .

Mike

How do you know ?

Harris

yeah , I'm going down .

Mike

So you're saying that you're not good at anything , yet Nothing comes to mind .

Harris

I just said something that came to mind , but sounds like Tully doesn't agree with me . I don't give a shit what Tully agrees with man .

Toliy

You have to tell me how are you good at making people laugh ?

Harris

I make people around me laugh all the time . Dude , what do you say ?

Toliy

I think we make ourselves laugh from you . Oh , shut up , man , is that not it ? No , who do you make laugh ? Okay , let's just say , if it was you , who ?

Mike

Oh , you definitely don't make people laugh , you know why ?

Toliy

You make your dad laugh .

Mike

Because you just told us a few minutes ago that you actually are not able to present Our group of circles .

Toliy

No not two people I've made .

Harris

DJ laugh . I've made Zeke laugh . I've made Joe laugh .

Mike

That's five people out of eight billion .

Harris

Okay , the problem is , I don't go out and you make your dad laugh , you don't do this with other people .

Mike

That's why I need to do this with other people .

Harris

You make your dad laugh .

Mike

That's why . I need to do it with other people .

Harris

So then you're not funny , harris , I am funny , I just haven't expanded my he's asking you .

Mike

You make your dad laugh Occasionally . Yeah , why Pulling down your panties ? What is wrong with you downstairs ?

Harris

mix up , fuck you bro okay , so no , but here's the thing you can't say that you make people laugh .

Mike

I mean , you can say whatever you want , but how do you say you make people laugh if you actually , for your whole 25 , 26 years that you've been , you know , roaming the earth , you only just discovered this few months ago that you actually like being funny and you like making people laugh and to being yourself .

In order to be good at something , I think a requirement is to be . I got to take it to the world . Yeah , you got to not be able to not be scared . You can't be funny with this . You know nobody's looking . Yeah , not be scared . You can't be funny where nobody's looking .

Toliy

But when we go to TC's on Monday and talk about your internship with them , I want you to make the lady in there laugh , okay .

Harris

I'm not doing no internship with TC's man .

Toliy

I'm just saying I want you to make the lady laugh . It's either you make her laugh or you get an internship . I'm not going to do an internship , but I want you to make her laugh , right , because you're good at making people laugh .

Harris

She's not going to understand a word I'm fucking saying . Bro , she speaks English . Barely so You're going to make her laugh , let's take it to New York . That's all I'm saying . Mm-hmm , you know , if you're not down with it , totally you ain't got to come . You know what ?

Toliy

I'm saying we don't need no negativity . We can start with the Pizza Town crowd , right .

Mike

Yeah , there's a comedy show tonight at Pizza Town .

Harris

I'm not doing no faggot Pizza Town , bro .

Toliy

That serial killer . Bro , what do you mean ? You'll go and we'll see what people think . You got material prep there now . I'm not starting at Pizza Town , so right now we have a whole crowd of like people in New York that are like , hey , here comes the rooster .

Harris

Oh , what the fuck ? It's not going to be rooster bro . It's not going to be rooster .

Toliy

Make the people laugh . What are you going to say ? Fuck you .

Mike

Say something funny Like what are you going bust their balls ? Learn a little bit about them . Do a routine on us . Give us some fresh comedy . Besides , fuck you , oh , fuck you , oh , fuck you man oh you guys are fucking fuck .

Harris

You give us something you're gonna wait to see .

Toliy

I do every fucking day . What would you do , though , to the people like , what , like ? Can you give me an example ?

Harris

you're gonna wait and see . What would you do , though , to ?

Mike

the people . Can you give me an example ?

Harris

You're going to wait and see it's going to be a surprise .

Mike

Can you give me an example ? No , but do it for us , show us .

Harris

No , man , it's going to be a surprise . Listen to the people asking . Man , I don't care what the people are asking .

Mike

They're going to have to wait for the video to be released .

Harris

Wow , I like going to have you guys record . That's just the way it is . Of course we're going to record , man You're not going to miss me , I'm doing it , you can't miss you , I'm doing it , I'm doing it , and then I'm going to fuck all the bitches .

Mike

Yeah , but you can't .

Harris

In nine months it's going to be little shoesties walking around .

Mike

You know what I'm saying your boy Green confirmed to me that you guys , actually there was no Irish girls . Yes , there was .

Harris

Yeah , yes , there was . I spoke to Green today on the phone , totally .

Mike

Yeah , he did confirm it . Actually he did . No , I'm like yo , oh , perfect , Green's on the phone , he's going to confirm the thing for me . He goes yeah , had those Irish girls in New York City when we took him home .

Harris

He fucking spoon fed him the thing .

Toliy

He did confirm it . Crespo already confirmed that nothing happened .

Harris

Yes , he did confirm it happened .

Toliy

No Crespo told me that they brought them back , but they didn't do anything with them .

Mike

Wow , but you guys took hallucinogenic . If you say you guys took hallucinogenic , anything goes wrong .

Harris

No , bro , it did happen . I'll take it . Why the hell would we bring him back and not do anything ?

Toliy

You didn't do anything with that . We did do them . Crispy already confirmed that you were fucking making him .

Mike

Shut up , crispy set you up man , he threw you under the bus . No , he did confirm it .

Harris

Yeah , why'd he throw you under the bus like that man . He didn't , he did confirm it .

Toliy

Yeah , then when Crispy was at my house he's whispering , he's like Remember doing that , or no ?

Harris

No , okay , good Damn , I didn't do that . All right , listen , you didn't do that , no .

Mike

It didn't happen . Wow , it didn't happen . Holy shit , it did happen . It doesn't matter . Listen , we already knew that you like to .

Harris

Let's just oh fuck , Shut up . You like to lie ?

Toliy

Oh , fuck you actually . Yeah , but he thinks he's a good liar .

Mike

He's a terrible liar , but he's good at lying a lot .

Harris

Let's put it this way , right ? You don't believe ? My ex thinks I'm awesome in bed , right ?

Toliy

You never asked her if you're the bull from New Jersey . He wouldn't even ask her about the Hall Pass thing for $1,000 .

Harris

She sent me this today .

Mike

I miss your sweet dick Willie .

Harris

She sent me this video today when he takes your soul and you have to be quiet because there's people in the house .

Mike

So what is that ? Well , you took it deep .

Toliy

What does that even mean ?

Harris

She sent me this bro .

Mike

Don't show us any weird stuff , man you guys were doing together . I don't want to see that .

Toliy

So what does this have to do with ?

Harris

you , like I don't show us any weird stuff , man , you guys were doing together . Man , I don't want to see that . So what does this have to do with you ? Like , like I don't understand , she's sending you fucking videos .

Mike

She's telling me she wants to dig deep , she wants you to take a deep . She wants 60 dollars , man , that's what she wants how much ? 60 now . No , she hasn't asked for any money . No , she's back . She's right now . She's investing . Right now she's holding diamond hands . Oh , fuck you , dude .

She's holding the stock , no matter where it's going to tank , because she knows it's going to go up again . Are you done ? I'm finished ? Alright , so you have no confidence because you're not educated . You're not educated enough , but you don't need confidence when you actually are educated enough . That make sense .

Harris

Take it to New York , boy . You just want to . You want to go right now ? No , why not ? I got a Tyson fight to watch , I got money on the line and I passed the time frame . What time frame ? 530 he gave me .

Mike

Oh , deadline . Yeah , you should have taken it , man . Half off would have been solid . I'm sticking to it . Nah , you should lose 400 . That way there's a better chance to solidify the lesson , yeah .

Toliy

Why don't you bet more ? I'll bet you 200 .

Harris

No man , why not ?

Toliy

How about this ? If you win , I'll give you 300 . If I win , you give me 200 .

Harris

No , I'm sticking with my shit . Cheers to Mikey boy , Don't let me down .

Mike

Mikey Tyson . So what are you saying , man , About confidence ? Totally Cheers to Mikey boy .

Toliy

Don't let me down , mikey Tyson so .

Harris

What are you saying , man , about confidence ? Totally I don't know . I think it's dead , man . I think it's dead . You just said it's not dead , it is dead . It's the dead , the way people use it .

Toliy

It's dead as a dog .

Harris

Dead as Baghdadi .

Mike

As Baghdadi .

Harris

All right , good talk , man , alright , good talk man see , that's not even your joke .

Mike

Using fucking uncle Donnie's joke , you're not even funny , donnie's funny that's the one thing I used from other people what about the other stuff , man , that you made up ? Oh , fuck , you is what I say , bro you're the first person to say , oh , fuck you that I know , yeah what channel ? nothing , so confidence is dead . Yeah , all right . What'd you see ?

What channel ? Nothing . Okay , so confidence is dead for some people , but for most people it's alive and well . So , now that you had this conversation , what do you think about the conversation we're having ? Earlier in the car , oh , he fell asleep . I'm sorry , guys .

Harris

I don't know .

Mike

Oh , do you think about the conversation we were having earlier in the car . Oh , he fell asleep . I'm sorry guys , I don't know . Oh , you're awake . Oh , so what are you actually lacking now from being successful ? Fear and knowledge , man , fear and knowledge , mm-hmm . And what do you fear or fearful of ? We already talked about that .

Harris

I know , but I off . We already talked about that . I know , but I'm not sure if the people heard it . What other people think , uh-huh . So I gotta put myself out there , man balls and all how do you change that belief , that or the thing you ?

Mike

you said that hey , I care what people think . How do you change that ? You gotta get used to just being yourself and do you think if you get good at something , mm-hmm right , if you actually get the knowledge , you will still care what people think no , but that works for sales , but it doesn't work for the outside world .

Harris

Who told you this ? Wait what ? What doesn't work for the outside world ? Who told you this Wait what doesn't ? The knowledge ? Excuse me , because what I fear knowledge is not going to help . That Excuse me .

Toliy

How do you know this ? What in the hell are you saying ? What are you talking about ?

Mike

I told you he's tipsy . I'm not tipsy . You're drunk man no .

Harris

Yeah , what are you going to do with DUI test ? I'm not drunk , you're driving right now under the influence You're driving on that couch man , You're couch surfing .

Mike

Yeah , how are you under this impression that , if your knowledge goes up , that you won't become better at something ?

Harris

How do I take that to the outside world ? With fear of being myself ?

Mike

How do you think people get good at something Practice Repetition right , Learning about it and implementing it right . Why , every time you move , you look like you're pinching one off and it's hurting your butthole .

Toliy

My back . What is the outside ?

Mike

world . That's for everyone . You're on a different type of time today , right ?

Harris

Yeah , all right .

Toliy

Your meds are right .

Harris

Yeah , alright , your meds are wearing off .

Toliy

Yeah , they are . Okay , I figured .

Mike

I forgot about that man . I already forgot . You're on meds , man Damn .

Harris

What the fuck ? How do you forget ? I'm on meds . I'm going crazy .

Mike

I usually don't see you past 5 pm man week , or you did not usually now . Okay , so are you gonna answer the question ? I don't know today for this podcast ? All right , are you done for the podcast or I don't know ? Man , are you not done ? Are you not following the logic here ? I'm following the logic , okay totally can you .

Uh , maybe , harris , if you could try . Oh my god , what the hell is he doing right now ?

Toliy

what in the hell is that over there ?

Mike

maybe you can uh pay attention , but it doesn't seem like it . No , totally . How did you become , uh a good shooter , like the that you became , and then become confident in it ?

Toliy

I put myself out there .

Mike

You did not just fucking say that I mean .

Toliy

I shot for a long time . That was my thing . First off , I practiced probably almost more than anybody . I was at the rec center every day , playing all day . Why are you smiling ?

Mike

I cannot believe we don't have a video element bro . The faces he's making is unbelievable . I'm fucking Fuck you . It looks like you're pinching one off man . You got a painful shit coming out . Video element bro . The faces he's making is unbelievable . I'm fucking fuck you .

It looks like you're pinching one off man , like you got a painful shit coming out I'm not pinching one off I got a fucking back tattoo . No , man , I got a back tattoo that itches yeah , but what does it have to do with like taking a shit , a painful shit ?

Harris

You never fucking itch , a fucking spot that . It's like I don't make that face though .

Mike

So , harris , I was asking totally what ? How did he become good at basketball and then , as a result of that , he basically said practice and knowledge okay same thing . I just fucking said okay , so what , what , uh ? What's stopping you from getting more knowledge ? Do you feel like you need more knowledge , or you felt like maybe you're ?

Harris

fuck you , man . I'm itching . It's unbelievable , are you gonna ?

Mike

tattoo on your back pussy . Oh fuck you man . Why do itching ? It's unbelievable you got a tattoo on your back pussy fuck you man why do you scratch the fat in between your stomach and your breast ? Fuck you you got under boobage , fuck you what do they call it that flarb ?

Toliy

fuck you , I've never heard that before fuck you .

Mike

So , harris , so you , you're done . Sounds like you just want to go home and eat a rotisserie chicken .

Toliy

Fuck you , man . How many empanadas would you do right now ?

Harris

I already had empanadas this morning . How many ? How many did I have ? Yeah , three . This man bought it for me .

Toliy

You had three empanadas for breakfast this morning ?

Harris

Yeah , three , yeah . How many did you have All cheese ? All cheese ? Three . Yeah , how many do you have all cheese , all cheese . It looks into the pops .

Mike

All disappointed dude I'm not disappointed you didn't have five .

Toliy

I think yeah , I was hoping you'd have six or seven they only had three , unfortunately yeah , I took the last three so they make more in 10 minutes yeah , but you .

Mike

but you know , time is money , man , why Would you have ?

Toliy

wanted five .

Mike

He said I only wanted two . I'm like yo stop playing with yourself , man . Give me at least three . Two is not anything .

Harris

He does one .

Mike

One is one bite for him .

Harris

Dude . Yeah , I finished that shit in like four bites .

Mike

They were killer .

Harris

They're always killer man . It's the .

Mike

Lincoln .

Harris

Grill boy .

Mike

Unbelievable , okay , okay .

Toliy

Why do you look like a seal that's having a hard time taking a shit ? Look at yourself , man .

Mike

I can't believe he got so drunk off of one beer . I'm not drunk bro .

Harris

I'm exhausted . From what I didn't get a lot of sleep last night .

Mike

Alright . Is there anything else you'd like to add , harris or ask .

Harris

Stop looking at me like that .

Mike

Harris , what Is there anything else you'd like to add or ask ? No , okay , you're done . Tully , any questions , thoughts , any other topics you want to discuss ?

Toliy

Yeah , I mean I'd be curious to hear if anyone who's listening to this or just in general , can bring up examples where they're actually really good at something or actually have the truth , but they're just lacking this mystical confidence , I think based on what we discussed .

Mike

I think that's impossible .

Toliy

Uh no , but I feel like a lot of people feel this way and how would you like them to come forward and tell you ?

Mike

What do you ?

Toliy

mean come forward .

Mike

First off we have a thing , we have a platform . My friend , Do we have a ?

Harris

you have a website . My friend do we have a .

Mike

You have a website x . We have x . We're on the digital socials you know , I'm saying I'm sorry , I don't know the ins and outs of your fucking podcast , man . Okay , people can reach out and ask questions on the uh twitter , I think it's not twitter anymore x . Yeah , they can ask on x ?

Um , like a way , and they can also comment on our podcast , I think on Spotify or whatever , you can write comments .

Toliy

So , people can't be actually good at something , genuinely , truly good at something , and not have the confidence is what you're saying totally yeah , I think that like , yeah , I just feel like the way that people perceive confidence or use it is that it's one like a mystical thing , like a mysterious , like magical thing that you can't explain .

Because if you're saying that this is what you need , and then people like they'll tell you things , but there's no way , they're like okay , that makes sense . Now the confidence has , like um , risen um so why do people think like that ?

Mike

why do people want like , why are ? Why are people saying that this is a magical , mystical thing ? Because I agree with you , I've heard this thing before . You know the lack of confidence from myself , from , obviously , harris and other people . They feel like there's something missing , some magical thing . Why do people want to put it on that ?

Toliy

Well , because it's a very good excuse to not not do something or not understand something , are they ?

Mike

consciously doing this probably not no they do believe it's something magical right , it's a very good excuse .

Toliy

You can't explain it and you can't disprove it and you can't like , if you don't do anything about it , it's completely fine because it's like you know .

Mike

Yeah .

Toliy

There's a mystical force that's like holding you back .

Mike

Yeah , yeah , oh , I definitely , I definitely agree . I think the opinion of people probably is that it's a magical , mystical thing . Where did people learn this thing , to do this ?

Harris

Don't tell me you took a picture , bro .

Mike

So where did people learn to do this thing ? Motherfucker , amazing . So I told you he's drunk or something . He's tipsy .

Harris

I'm exhausted , dude .

Mike

Yeah , I mean , I'm not sure from what , but I understand .

Harris

I didn't get much sleep last night . I told you that man .

Mike

Who did though ?

Harris

How many hours did you get ?

Mike

Three Little CI mission . Is it the ops ?

Harris

Or the Ops Undercover ops little CIA mission , is it the ?

Mike

ops , or the ops , undercover ops , black ops that's a fly out to you .

Harris

You did that . Crystal huh , yeah , the secret weapon back in the day .

Mike

Yeah , so Harris , who told people to use this confidence as a thing instead of taking responsibility ?

Harris

I can't tell you that . You have any guesses are you done ? Generations of people generation .

Mike

It wasn't donnie . No , okay , totally . Why did people develop this like ? Who developed this like this uh thing ?

Toliy

because were they conscious when they created this like uh idea well , I'm not if they were conscious or not , but I think it's .

Mike

I think the inability to explain or understand things creates this kind of like illusion so , yeah , I think it's , and that makes me think about the last something that was dead in the first place , which is discipline , and that ties into it as well .

It's the inability that makes me think about the last no , something that was dead in the first place , which is discipline , and that ties into it as well . It's the inability to explain What'd you say ? The inability to explain or do something about it .

Toliy

To explain something or like understand something .

Mike

Yeah , and I think that's the same thing as like a discipline . When you don't want to actually ask questions , but you want to keep doing stuff , you know you have to employ like a more , like a blind , magical thing , you know , instead of asking the questions do I really want to do this ?

Do I really know enough about this to do this successfully , to be good at it ? So I guess it's like coming from From that position that people don't want to learn and they're stuck on their belief system that this is the only way to do it , like they're doing as much as they can to be successful .

Toliy

But that's not the truth well , I think like they might be doing what they can , but they're they're kind of um like based on their own understanding they're content with being held back by like the world , or by confidence , or by fear , like stuff like that , and that's also like having a reason for why something is happening , is a very is is like a must-have

super necessary for all .

Mike

Yeah , everybody would like to make sense , even if it's dysfunctional .

Toliy

People do everything like to make sense , even if it's dysfunctional . Everything has to make sense to them , everything .

Mike

Yeah , but then when things don't make sense Harris , this is very important here , you're probably not going to hear it but when things don't make sense , people don't say , they don't ask why . They're scared to ask questions like why is this not making sense ? They just want to keep hammering it . So the question to you is why are you not successful ?

Why are you not , you know , getting ? Uh , why are you not good at sales or or whatever other things you would like to become good at ? You know , maybe , like a ventriloquist , you could be the puppet . Fuck you , man , fuck you , yeah . So why are people not asking those questions ? I think that's important . I think we got to get him an Uber home .

He can't drive . I can drive , bro . He's going to fall asleep .

Toliy

Yeah , man , you're good to drive right now .

Harris

I got autopilot . You've been drinking too much , man . I haven't been drinking too much .

Toliy

He's falling asleep behind the wheel . Are you crazy ? That's a lot . Ugh , fuck you .

Mike

Yeah , okay , harris , any final thoughts ? Besides , you're hungry and yeah , uh , fuck you .

Harris

Fuck you . Okay , fuck you .

Toliy

Those are my final thoughts , totally , um no , I think we said everything mike .

Mike

No , I think , um , I think what we said . Yeah , I agree , um , with totally , I think discipline . I mean discipline , confidence is dead . It's fake news because it doesn't need to exist when you're actually doing the right thing and you're doing it the right way . So I guess we're going to know the title of this podcast , right , harris ?

If you guys are your guests , I'll give you three hints . Confidence is dead . Wow , you're good man . Wow , you're good . All right , thank you guys . Thanks for watching .

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