Ever feel like you're dragging? Like you don't have enough energy to do all the things you want to do, or just wish you had more oomph in general? The fact is, when you're healthy and vital, you're more attractive. You also want to have sex more (your libido goes up). You're more likely to go for what you want in dating. And you show up as the best version of yourself in long-term, committed relationships like marriages. You inspire those around you. You've got what you need to go after your goa...
Mar 03, 2023•1 hr 1 min
How do you know if monogamy is right for you? Ever been curious about what it would actually be like to be a swinger, or date other people while still being in a healthy marriage? Jackie was actually married twice, in two traditional, monogamous relationships (with kids), before she connected with John — or, in fact, reconnected with him, since they actually went to high school together. By that point, John was running several clubs for swingers, and Jackie was curious to hear more. She went on ...
Feb 24, 2023•1 hr 11 min
We work with a lot of men in demanding professions, whether that means long work hours, high-stakes environments (like hospitals), hard manual labor, or being mentally taxing or stressful. Many of these men have to hide their emotions and/or vulnerability at work, and/or are in jobs like software development or IT that have them at a computer, isolated, all day long. Any and all of this can take a toll, and impact your love life. When it comes to sex and relationships, it can be challenging to n...
Feb 17, 2023•1 hr 4 min
Guy Blaise is a Frenchman who has lived in the U.S. for a number of years. As a man who has dated and had sex with both European and North American women, he has an intriguing perspective. Here we delve into the differences between dating in France and the U.S., and the various questions raised by those, such as: Why are French women more likely to tell a man what they like or don't like in bed? How do you approach a European vs. North American woman, and why does that feel so different? Why is ...
Feb 10, 2023•43 min
When it comes to dating, relationships, and sex, there's a strong cultural norm -- the plotline of what we're "supposed" to want. It goes like this: You start dating, become sexually exclusive, get engaged, get married, buy a house (with a white picket fence!), have kids, and stay together until you die. No sex, dating, or romance with anyone else, ever. This is known as the "relationship escalator," and it can sometimes feel like the only choice out there. But what if you got off the escalator?...
Feb 03, 2023•1 hr 6 min
Ever felt "flat" in life? Like you've done a lot of the things you were "supposed" to do, but you're still not fulfilled? Or perhaps you just have this nagging feeling that more is possible. This is often a subtle pattern, but it's one we've seen in a number of our clients. Some have got a pretty good relationship with pretty good sex, but the sense that the level of depth and closeness with their partner could be much richer. Others have experienced success in certain aspects of life (i.e. job/...
Jan 27, 2023•1 hr 1 min
How did you know when you stopped being a boy and became a man (if that's how you identify)? And if you're raising a son, how will he know when he's a man? Rites of passage are critical to our development as humans ... but they're sorely missing from mainstream culture. Indigenous cultures and first nations have much to teach here. A big issue in mainstream culture is that there's little guidance for dads on how to guide boys into becoming the healthy masculine. There's a lot of talk about toxic...
Jan 20, 2023•1 hr 4 min
Ever read No More Mr. Nice Guy , or heard about Nice Guy Syndrome and related to it? If you've identified yourself as a Nice Guy, you may have the feeling, "Where do I go from here?" Jason, a self-proclaimed recovering Nice Guy, goes through the steps related to overcoming Nice Guy Syndrome. Instead of being a Nice Guy, there's a new archetype: the Kind Man. Overcoming Nice Guy Syndrome includes addressing the pattern of rumination (being in your head a lot, obsessing about what the right thing ...
Jan 13, 2023•1 hr 3 min
Here are 4 common questions I get from men, whether clients or listeners like you: How do I approach a woman at the gym or grocery store or other public place? How do I approach someone I work with to date? What do I do if I contend with erectile dysfunction (ED) or premature ejaculation (PE) and find that that blocks me from even approaching women at all? Which dating app should I use, and how do I regulate myself around the apps (i.e. not checking them all the time)? Here, I answer all four of...
Jan 06, 2023•40 min
If you’ve ever had the experience of being too scared to approach or pursue the women you really want, this one’s for you. (It’s also for you if you’ve ever felt like you were settling for a partner, rather than feeling thrilled and pumped to be with them.) Many men we work with have found themselves dating or even marrying women who approached them — in other words, they haven’t felt empowered to go after the women they really wanted. But this often means that they’re not the ones choosing to g...
Dec 30, 2022•55 min
Ever wished you could be a fly on the wall while women talked frankly about their sex lives!? We got you. Here, four of us women who have sex with men go into detail around the best sex we've ever had. We talk about dating, relationships, and what made certain men stand out when it came to the sex part. A few things that made the cut: blow jobs, being tied up, oral sex (him going down on her), intercourse, destination sex, getting wet, anticipation, kink, and "The Jump-Off Guy" (you're definitel...
Dec 23, 2022•1 hr 9 min
Ever frozen up around someone you found attractive? It can be exceedingly frustrating — you're fine around other people, but put you in front of a beautiful woman and your system just shuts down. Before you can even get to dating someone, having sex, or being in a relationship, you've got to talk to them, right!? Many of our single clients want to be confident with women. Yet many men report getting triggered before any kind of interaction at all. Thoughts like these interrupt: "Why would she ev...
Dec 16, 2022•57 min
There's a critical dating/relationship skill that some men have mastered, and it makes a huge difference on our side. It makes us feel special and also has us relax such that we can show up in our most exquisite, sexy radiance. But we'll rarely explicitly ask for it. Kinda like certain things in sex, we don't always say this out loud, but it's on our minds and in our hearts. What's great is that it's not even a difficult skill! A lot of our clients say things like, "Wow, this is easier than I wa...
Dec 09, 2022•55 min
Ever wondered what it's actually like to open up a relationship -- meaning explore ethical non-monogamy (ENM), also known as polyamory? Whether you're wanting more or different kinds of sex, or just more connection, love, and variety in your relationships, your desires are valid, and being in an open relationship can be healthy and fulfilling. But open relationship/polyamory can be a confusing and scary thing to bring up. How do you say, "I want us to stay together and date other people" without...
Dec 02, 2022•1 hr 16 min
Ever been in a relationship where you felt like she was nitpicking at you, like you could never do anything right? Or ever been in a phase where it felt like she was never happy with you, and was sharp and poky or picked fights for seemingly no reason? Real talk: When I feel loved and cherished by my man, little things don't bother me as much. But when I question that love or don't feel cherished, then I feel triggered all the time ... and I don't show up as the warmest, most loving version of m...
Nov 25, 2022•1 hr 14 min
Ever wished you could explore different kinds of sexy things in your relationship? How exactly does one go from missionary position to consensual flogging? Well, let us tell you! When it comes to sex, dating, and relationships, there's a lot of mystery around kink and BDSM. What "counts" as kinky, and how do you talk to your partner about wanting to explore it? How does one even get started in BDSM? Is it all whips and chains, or how does that work exactly!? We go into all this and more as Sara ...
Nov 18, 2022•1 hr 20 min
A pattern we often hear from the men we work with is that it's really hard for them to approach their partner for sex. This could be a dating partner or someone they're in a long-term committed relationship with. Heck, it could be their wife. If you've ever Googled, "How do I get my wife to have more sex with me?" you're not alone. The fear of approaching a partner for sex is real, and it can actually impact the whole relationship. For example, Jason noticed that after a year of being with a par...
Nov 11, 2022•58 min
When we think about body image, shame, and appearance, we often think about women. And for good reason — there's a lot of pressure on women to look a certain way, and it's easy to feel less-than if you're not in your 20s with a flat stomach, a perfect ass, and a great rack. But men have all kinds of emotions and self-judgment in this area, too. Ever felt like you're not enough? That you're somehow lacking in terms of your appearance? You're not alone! Whether it's feeling fat, not having six-pac...
Nov 04, 2022•53 min
What does it actually mean to "set the mood"? Yes, candles are fantastic — they give that soft light that makes everybody look great, and there's something to be said for that when it comes to sexy time. But there are lots of other ways to increase and enhance pleasure of all kinds, including scent . Aromatherapy is powerful, and here we outline how essential oils can aid in everything from helping you to calm down, as well as to develop self-love. Whether you're in a dating phase or a committed...
Oct 28, 2022•48 min
Want that sizzle, that dazzle, that magical mystique? Of course you do. Everyone does. And if you're in a long-term relationship, it can feel harder to maintain that over time. We're witnessing an epidemic of sexless relationships -- some studies put it at 15% of all marriages. When it comes to sex, sensuality, and a woman's erotic essence, it can be easy to lose. One way this can show up is as mismatched desire. A man wants sex with his woman (i.e. wants to know, "How do I get my wife to have s...
Oct 21, 2022•1 hr 12 min
Want hot sexy polarity in your relationship or dating life? You're gonna want to master this. It's the one relationship skill to rule them all. Here, we get personal and real about the men we've been with who've done this skillfully (and made us want to drop our panties), as well as those who've missed the mark. You can learn from both. Where many men are taught to be either passive or aggressive, there is a middle way. And it's hot when men do it. What is it? Leading. Leading isn't being a domi...
Oct 14, 2022•55 min
Ever felt like a woman was testing you, pushing your boundaries in annoying ways, or giving you a "shit test" (not a great term, but one you may be familiar with)? Here's a hint: if you don't want negative emotional tension, you may need to become skilled at positive emotional tension. Whether you're in a dating relationship, long-term marriage, or somewhere in between, the feminine is mysterious. Many men are baffled by how to relate when it seems like what he's doing is never enough. Why can't...
Oct 07, 2022•1 hr 15 min
What does it mean to actually be honest when it comes to sex? A lot of couples never really talk about their sex life in depth. Sure, maybe one person in the relationship says they'd like to be having more sex. But that's different from having real, raw conversations about what's working, what each person wants more or less of, and what their deep-down turn-ons actually are. Why? Because it's scary to have these kinds of talks! Whether you're new to dating or you're in a long-term, committed rel...
Sep 30, 2022•47 min
Ever wished sex were easier? As in, that you could feel totally comfortable in your body, fearless in your sexuality, easily ask for what you want, and facilitate hot sexy experiences with women you feel attracted to? Maybe you contend with premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, or porn addiction. Maybe you're ashamed of how much you want sex or don't even go after women you really want because you're unsure you'll be able to perform sexually. Maybe you're with a partner but feel like you ...
Sep 23, 2022•1 hr 2 min
Do you want more sex with your wife (or partner)? Ever wanted to have sex in order to feel better? Do you get really pent-up when you haven't had sex with your woman in a while? Men these days are overwhelmingly lonely. Over the past 30 years there has been a drastic drop in rates of friendships for both women and men, but the trend is far more pronounced for men. One study showed that nearly one in three men said they couldn't name a best friend, and a full 18% said they had no close friends at...
Sep 16, 2022•53 min
Ever been abused by a woman partner? Been with a woman with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)? If so, you're not alone. But you may be confused. Physical abuse is pretty clear — if someone throws something at you or hits you, you know they're abusive. But what about emotional abuse? The line between her healthy emotional expression and emotional abuse can be blurry sometimes, especially if you're isolated and haven't told anyone about what's going on. Secrets are rarely healthy, and never wh...
Sep 09, 2022•50 min
What are the signs a girl likes you? How do you know whether a woman is interested? If you're a man who has sex with women and you've ever wondered how to tell if she likes you, you're not alone. It can be especially hard to tell when it's a woman in a service role, like a barista, waitress, or cashier. How do you know whether she's just being friendly or she's interested in dating you or being sexual with you? As a late bloomer, Jason shares his own personal journey around figuring out how wome...
Sep 02, 2022•57 min
As a culture we don't talk about this a lot, but what happens when you're jealous of your partner? Not jealous in the traditional sense, but wanting to feel as successful as your partner — say financially, or career-wise. It can be hard to handle it when your partner is doing better than you in a certain way, because while you want to be happy for them, you may also wish you had that great job, opportunity, money boost, etc. As a man, this may hit extra-hard if you feel like you "should" be the ...
Aug 26, 2022•58 min
If you've ever been married or in a long-term committed relationship, you know that the sparks that flew at the beginning don't just keep burning over time -- especially if kids are in the picture. When you're cohabitating, parenting, running a household together, and dealing with life's everyday stressors, sexy time can fall by the wayside. While sex is vital in a healthy relationship, desire can seem to fade. The good news? It is possible to get that hot sexy spark back. Here, we discuss Alici...
Aug 19, 2022•59 min
Ever felt like your wife or partner has sex with you just to fulfill her duty in the relationship? That she's not really into it, but knows she "should" or feels like she "must"? If so, you're not alone -- for many men, one of the most painful experiences in long-term relationships is feeling like their partner is just "letting" them have sex with them, but doesn't really want to be doing it. It can be immensely lonely, not to mention demoralizing. Fortunately things don't have to stay this way....
Aug 12, 2022•50 min
