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Poop Friday

Jan 19, 202427 min
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Episode description

Analyzing some more dreams, a few more poop stories but then we're wrapping it up!, our favorite cheeses, meeting your soulmate while you're with someone else, an update on Dave's children's book and more!

Transcript

Minnesota, Goodbye for Friday. Jenny's wearing Fusha. That is apparently your color, because I think that is probably the best color. That You're an attractive person, So you're one of those people that you can pull off anything. You can wear mauv tan blue, light blue, navy blue, but that is a good color on you. I definitely can't pull off anything because I have more of that, like fair skin, pinkish tone to my skin, so like mav not my color, those like lighter colors like that. But

I do love this one. I saw it at Target like a year ago, and I was like, that is for me. I must buy it, and I did. I like it. You know, it's funny because you ever go to the sunglasses store sunglass Hut and you try and sunglasses and some of them you look stupid in yep, and your friend will be honest and go nope, not nope. Oh okay, there's one. I dated a girl briefly who was way out of my league when I was twenty one

years old. She was a flight attendant and she was way out of my league, and she we went to the like I don't know, some sunglasses store, the sunglasses rack in the mall or whatever, and everyone she tried on she looked great because she was beautiful. Yeah, and it was like, beautiful people can pull off anything. But I think I might disagree with that. I think some people do look silly in certain sunglasses because I think

it has to do with your face shape. Yeah, probably, so I look awful in like kind of smaller, skinnier ones, which has been like coming back in the last couple of years, and that's just not my thing. I can't do that. All right, Well, let's move on to get away from fashion and move on to the actual content of the podcast. I did send out about fifteen staff writer stickers last night while I sat and watched the news, and there's just a satisfaction of like going through and sending

all of those out. So if you've asked for one, it is on its way. And look for my chicken scratch handwriting on the envelope hand address by me in my kitchen or my living room. And by the way, oh, I got to give a shout out to two people who contributed money for more staff writer stickers, and they venmowed me money. Remember yesterday somebody

said, I'll venmo you money. Yeah, because they said they want to go to the drive through or go to the grocery store and buy the order of the person behind them, but they don't always know that that's, you know, like going to be appreciated or whatever. So they said, Patrick Olson venmoed me. And I'm not going to say the amount because it was very generous, but I don't want people to think, oh, that's the amount we're expecting. You do not need to venmo me anything for staff writer

sticker. So it was this is this is on me. But also Lynn, who listens in, I want to say, o maha. She also venmoted me for more staff writer stickers. Not necessary, but I love that you did that. I mean they do add up. They're expensive to make. There's the envelopes and then postage stamps are about sixty cents apiece. So if I mail out ten that's six dollars. If I mail out one hundred, that's sixty dollars. It's not going to kill me, and I love

doing it. I just love that you actually want to write a sticker. I want to get a sticker. For example, this person Rachel says so many topics I wanted to email in the last couple of weeks. But I've got nothing more than two sentences to say, so I never actually do. But I'm not sure if anybody else who listens feels the same way. You know what, if you want to write in with something and we don't use it, then that's okay. But go ahead and write in why not?

Yesterday you were talking about recurring dreams, and I have one that I cannot figure out why it keeps happening. I'm always at some sort of event and I'm wearing really high heels and i can't stand up fully your walk and it's so frustrating. I can't seem to figure out the deeper meaning. And I also literally never wear heels, so it's a very unlikely situation in the first

place. I don't know, but it would interpret that off the top of my head, I would say you were probably going through something that makes you uncomfortable or makes you feel like you don't fit in. Yeah, when I google what does it mean when you can barely like stand up or walk in a dream, and says that it's a sign you feel like you're not in

control of some aspect of your life. Okay, it's always so vague, you know, but it could be helpful if you think about it, like, is there something you feel like you're not in control of right now? And that could be She's got another one, she says. I also just had a dream the other night that was so random. I have to share. My husband and I are huge Survivor fans, and in my dream, we're on some sort of bus tour. The first stop on the tour is

a replica of the fire Making Challenge. Survivor fans know the hype, Oh I know it, do you? Oh yeah, and we were all so excited to try it for ourselves. Well, once I stepped foot off the bus, I slipped on the grass that was also somehow a pit of muddy water, and I slipped away to a different location. I went into a new dream situation, but was still consciously thinking, how the f do I get back to the fire making ha ha. I don't have an interpretation for

that one, But then that could be again. Maybe you feel like there's a part of your life that is it's frustrating because you're not in control of it. Maybe maybe your work situation, maybe a family situation. Something I know, you're running low on staff rider stickers. I'd love one if you have some left. I do, I do, and we won't run out, trust me. I finally got a Yetti cup for Christmas. I'm so excited to fill it with stickers. Right now, my only sticker is one

of a pig with the phrase hogs and kisses under it. Okay, that is adorable. Happy Friday, have a great weekend. That is Rachel and Riverfalls. Thank you, Rachel, your sticker will be on its way. I like that Rachel doesn't like need her Stanley to be so fancy and not filled with stickers. I like that she's going to be putting stickers on it because you don't see many people walking around. Would like because we all we all have like a mug, Andrew and I have like or like a thermos

that we have our stickers on and stuff. And it's some old thing, you know, like not anything you care that much about, but a Stanley that's pristine there. It's kind of putting, like like putting stickers on your brand new Mercedes or something. And it's funny because if you're old enough, you remember when bumper stickers were a thing. Radio stations used to give away

bumper stickers. Well, cars don't really have bumpers like they used to, and so the bumpers are kind of built into the body of the car. They used to be like a chrome bumper back in the seventies and eighties, and now they're built in the color of the car, so they're much more conspicuous. And we haven't given out bumper stickers on this radio station, I don't think since I've been here. Yeah, we've given away stickers. And we give away these stickers, but people put them on their computer top or

on their yetti bottle and that's mine a on my computer. Got a funny poop story for you? Your favorite? I know I'm not going to get into a trend of poop stories here, Okay, I don't what I did. I did, and now I'm gonna say I'm gonna limit the number. If you got a poop story, I'll give you one week to get it in. After that, no more poop story. Can I do like Naughty Tuesday would do poop Friday? No? No, that's funny idea. Though. I was in the car with my six year old and three year old

this summer, driving home. We turned down a country road to get home and there's a truck on the side of the road. As we pass, we see an older man with his pants all the way down, bent over and his wife next to him with a wipe. My kids started screaming, his butt, Mommy, his butt? Why is he naked? It was clear he had to go right then and there and there, but it was extra fun trying to explain to my two young kids why they had the pleasure

of seeing this guy's bare ass. To top it off, as we drove by, the wife and husband just stared at us ass out and all. Hope you guys got a little chuckle out of my experience. Thanks for all you do to keep us entertained. All absolutely, yeah, thank you Bree from Ellsworth. We appreciate you. What's Elsworth known for cheese? Is that what their nose is? Yeah, they've got a big I don't know if it's a cheese plant or something, but a big creamrie of sorts there.

What's your favorite cheese? You're gonna snack on cheese minus sharp cheddar? What is yours? Yeah? If I'm just having a little snacky, I definitely go sharp cheddar. If I'm doing like a charcuterie, board. I want something soft that's spreadable, Okay. I like a good goat cheese also, So just depends on the mood in the situation. Yeah, you know what. I get that when you get charcuterie board, yeah you want to spread it on the crackers. But if I'm just doing like a little summer sausage

and cheese, I'll go for sharp cheddar. Do you ever do any like hobannaro cheddar? Try anything? Oh? Yeah, there's some good. There's like a big block of hobin Narow cheese you can get at Costco that Andrew and I get sometimes I want some. I made a charcuterie board for Susan for Valentine's Day or her birthday, they're two days apart, about two years ago. And I worked really hard on it. And I went down to the Buyerly's cheese section and got a bunch of different kinds of cheeses and some

meats and crackers, and I worked really hard. It wasn't artistic, because I'm not able to be artistic, and I'll be honest with you, it didn't go over that well. She's just not a charcuterie board, fatty, cheesy, meaty kind of a person. Yeah, so it didn't go over that well. I would not do it again. But you know, she there was a video that I put up on Instagram probably when I made it, and she came in and she's like, oh, that's nice, and I was like not the reaction of it. So next one, in answer

to a couple of questions posed on the minute, oda Goodbye. I met my soulmate while I was married to someone else. And I think we came up with this question the other day. Are you with your happily ever after? Because I know some people that are with their happily ever after. They don't look anywhere, they do not cheat, they do not maybe they flirt,

but they're with their happily ever after. And I know an equal amount of people who are not with their happily ever after and they're either planning on getting out or they're just not happy. Yeah, So would you say that it's half and half happily ever after in half and half people who are married or in a long term relationship living with somebody that they're not particularly happy with.

It's so hard for me to say because I'm still in that age where like a lot of my friends are just getting married, and I just don't really know. I think I think what a lot of people are learning is that like once you are in a longer relationship, you don't really know certain

things about people until you're in it for a long haul. Like even if you dated a couple years before you got married, you find out things as you're married, and especially with kids, you find out how someone parents and that doesn't always like equate to what you believe in, and then like the

love starts to fall from that. So I think it's a lot of like life situations happen where I think people are thinking they're in there happily ever after, and then life happens and you realize, just kidding, this isn't exactly what I wanted. I know somebody who I went to high school with, and she commented on a post of mine the other day, and so I clicked on her name because I used to have a crush on her back in

high school and she kind of had a crush on me. Never went anywhere, we never even went on a date, but I clicked on her and I went to because I was stalking, and I went to her about you know what I mean? On Facebook? I went to her about and it said divorced, and I'm not going to give the date because it's it's recently divorced and she's my age. Uh huh. And I'm like, man, when you get divorced at my age, you must have been really unhappy,

because starting over when you're older is not very appealing. Yeah, but sometimes it's like, there's just no way that I want to continue this, So I that's That's really all I was going to say is that some people. She it's it's hard when you're my age and you realize you're not with your happily ever after and you're like so desperately wanting to get away and start with

somebody new that you're going to leave somebody at this age. Yeah, I mean, for sure, I don't know a lot of people who have gotten divorced like that late in life. But I ought a great divorce. Oh okay, I feel like I don't know. Andrew recently helped someone buy a condo, a guy who was going through a divorce who is probably around the same age, and him and his wife are just like, we're good, we're friends. This wasn't it anymore for us, And they just kind of

called it, you know. So I think that some people just get to a point in life where they're like, eh, we don't need to be married anymore, but we can remain friends, right, And I think that's there's there's something they and I think that, you know, you look at somebody that is older and you go, oh, they must be so terribly happy. I know a couple and they I don't know him, but I know her quite well. And they both came from broken marriages, like they

both got cheated on, and so they got together. They bonded. They're both funny, and they're both They keep their finances separate, completely separate, which I found interesting their early forties, both successful, not wealthy, but wealthier than most people. They do really well. And they both agreed they're never going to cheat because they would never do to their partner what was done to them. They said, if you're not happy, then just let's break

up. And they said, we kind of check in like every six months and go, you're still happy? You still want to keep doing this? Yeah? And she said are we one hundred percent happy? Absolutely not, but are we happy enough to renew the contract for another six months? Or ye? Yeah, so let's go on with her story. We got off

track. I met my soulmate when I was married to somebody else. My soulmate was actually an acquaintance of my husband, and we met through somebody mutually, and the marriage was not My marriage was not at all happy, but at least it was somewhat stable, at least financially. And I've never been one to make big moves or encourage big change, so I figured I was

just destined to remain in my marriage situation. But apparently meeting my person did something me because I did end up leaving my marriage to be with him. Now he and I have been together almost ten years and married almost six, and I could not be happier. I love that story for you, And answer another question, I listened to the Minnesota Goodbye all the way through every time up until the ending Chumba Casino ad starts anyway, Yeah, and every

morning show podcasts. There are definitely big highlights of my day, and I haven't missed any in years. I don't know if you want me to say your name is, so I'm gona leave your name out, but you know who you are, and thank you so much for that. That is a great email. Uh day I and this person is from Texas. I've got two children. I'm an Oma German for Grandma since I was born in Germany to three grandchildren and they give their names. They're two, one and three

months. All my grandchildren have been born in the month of October. I would love to hear more about your children's book and when it might be available for purchase. Thanks so much, love your show. Would love a staff writers sticker, please dunka And her name is Alexandra and she's in Texas. So Alexandra love that you listen. Don't know how you found us children's book. It is at the printer, yes, and it is. We've we've

done all of that. When you when you write a book, there is so much you've got to do. You can't just write a book and then send it to the printer and then go, well, I've got a bunch of books. Now you've got to figure out how to sell them. You got to get it on Amazon. And do you want it on this feature on Amazon? Do you want it to you wanted to ship yourself out of

your garage? Do you want Amazon to do all the shipping? Do you want it in bookstore if you wanted in bookstores, there's other things you're gonna do. So there's a lot of work that we've hired a company to do all the work for us. We just have to make the decisions and pay the bills. Yeah, but it should be in the next couple of months,

which is great. But it's not in time for any special day Valentine's Day, Christmas, it's not it's not in time for any I would love to have had it in time for Christmas, and I'm proud of it. But the best part of the book is the artwork. Yeah, the artwork makes the book, it really does. The artist is somebody that we found online. And it's kind of like going through Tender. You go through all of these artists samples and you go, oh, hers is good, but

it looks a little childlike her. Hers is good, but it looks a little surreal. Did you find a few people and get like samples of what you wanted and then went from there, Yeah, exactly. We found a few people and we narrowed it down to like six, and we narrowed it down to a couple and then we had the one that we chose. Draw some samples and say, hey, what would the main character look like? And so she envisioned what the main character looked like, and then envisioned what

his family would look like. And she was brilliant. I mean, her artwork is funny and it's warm, and it's cute and sweet, and you know, I'm proud of my writing and I'm proud of the story, but her artwork makes the entire book. And when it's available, I will let you know for sure. Next one, Minnesota, Goodbye, Here we go. My name is My name was Chelsea. I listened to the show my entire life. I had a memory to share with Dave today, as well

as two emergency poop stories. I hope you enjoy ps. My husband won second place in the costume contest this past year at the Boo Bash. Thank you. We had the best time. He was the invisible man. Oh yes, Oh, I can't forget him. Poop number one, Here we go. I'm the one who asked for it. When I was in high school, I had a best friend that lived up north. We'd go visit her every summer. I'm gonna check the wave for him, just to make sure it's still recording, and it is okay, good news. Okay.

We go visit every summer. One day, we're at the lake, just swimming around. We both had to poop. Mind you, we were off of someone's dock, so it wasn't in front of a bunch of people, but it was right off a busy street. My friends decided to just poop right there in the water, next to the dock. I was about to,

but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I ended up sprinting across the busy road, looking left and right as I went, with clenched cheeks, holding my ass with one hand as that that would stop, as if that would stop something from happening. But I made it to the public restrooms on either side. Don't poop in the lake because people get in the lake and swim and kids get in there and the fish don't like it. Poop number two. A couple of years ago, my husband and I were at

Willow River and I had to poop bad. I don't know where. Willow River is, right across the border, a little bit past Hudson. It's beautiful. It has gorgeous waterfalls. We were the only ones in the area that I could see, and he told me go in the bushes, but the rocks were so fucking hot because of the sun. I decided I had to use the river. The only problem is I was facing downstream when I pooped, so the turd popped right up in front of me and we both

watched it float downstream. I hope you don't think I'm horrible after these I'm laughing typing it out. Don't poop in the water. I know it sounds like a safe alternative, but don't. I'm not judging you a little bit, but don't poop in the water because imagine the horror of somebody encountering that turd. Yeah, that is just an awful experience. So I got it a little built in bidet situation. It sounds like because I would not think if I was in a state park that had water to go in the water,

I would just go in the woods. I would think I would think wash off in the water. So anyway, just imagine me on a tube, drinking a bud light and all of a sudden, your big poopats by. Well, luckily it's not one of those drinking tubein rivers that willower memory. Eleven years ago, we went with some friends to a haunted hay ride eleven years ago, to a haunted hay ride type of thing for Halloween. To my pleasant surprise. Day was there handing out T shirts to people that

knew what scary movie he was describing. I knew the first one ride away and I got a shirt. Then no one was answering the next question. And since I know scary movies, well, I told my three friends each answer and we all ended up getting free shirts. It was a blast. I remember that night. Oh my god, I'm going to tell you something

that I remember about that night. I was going through some hard, hard shit in my life that night, really hard shit, and I remember I had such a good time that night that when I got in the car, I thought to myself, I didn't think about anything bad for the two or three hours that I was there, And that was one of the first times during that part of my life that I was able to not think of something awful. I didn't give any thought to it, right, So, in

other words, I was distracted. I think so many people have been in situations like that where your brain just can't get off of something that's going on in your life, and so the moment you realize you did something where you finally weren't focused on that. That is like a beautiful moment. It really was, and it was a transformative moment because I realized that I could put that out of my mind for two hours, and I remember getting to the

car and driving away. I can still picture in front of me looking out my window in my car thinking I didn't think about it for two or three hours. So I remember that night way better than I should, or all the wrong but also right reasons. Hope you enjoyed my stories. Sorry for the long email. Love listening to you three. Every morning I drive to work and I listened to the Minnesota Goodbye on my way home, or as soon as I can. I would love a rat staff writer sticker if you

still got them. Love you guys so much. Thanks for always making my laugh. That's Chelsea up in Saint Cloud. So I'm going to take a picture of your name there, Chelsea. Oh, there's your last name. Gotta get your last name in there too. Okay, done, sticker on its way. Another one, please don't say my name. Oh. We talked about this one yesterday, so we're now kind of back to emails that we This was the sex quiz. When do we talk about this on the

podcast? About it? I think you saw it after the show, so we didn't talk about it on the podcast. Okay, yeah, so this one, Jenny says, they mentioned on her and Falence podcast about a quiz with your significant other about sex topics. At the end, it shows you both mutually said what you might be into. Well, I look this up and made my husband do it, and my, oh my, has the

sex been good. We are about fifteen years into having been together, and while I wouldn't say the spice in the bedroom had been lacking, this sure opened up some new doors. Definitely recommend it. I did the I'm gonna give you the quiz she gave, although it might not be the same one now, but I can give the one I have too. I'll give both. Okay, sure, here's the one that we're for her quiv dot r e quiv dot r and it's a sex quiz. And then she says,

my husband is thankful as well. Jenny, thanks for the recommendation. No dart licking after this quiz or gasmically yours and we won't say her name. What's the quiz? You found? The one I did. It's the website Mojo upgrade dot com. So Mojo m ojo upgrade dot com. I don't know how Andrew found it. He just found it one day over Christmas break

and we took it. And I very much agree you'd be surprised that, Like, if you've been with your partner for a long time, you might think that you know exactly what each other wants in the bendroom, but then you actually open up a line of communication with something like this, and it's like, oh, I didn't know you would be into that. Okay. So interesting. It's like if you're with somebody for a long time, you

think you know what they're into. But I think sometimes people are afraid to ask for something because they don't want the other person to go, you fucking kid me, you're fucking gross, or I was embarrassed to ask for it. So interesting, Okay, last one. I'm writing in because I'm hoping for a few suggestions and we'll probably need your help. At the end of February, my best friend and I are taking a weekend trip to Minneapolis for

some nice dinners and cocktails and airbnb. We want to eat at Fogo to Shao and we want to be relatively close, but we want to stay somewhere comfy. After dinner, we're hoping to get some cocktails before headed back to the airbnb. Here's my problem. I want to stay somewhere that is safe, has a few stops for drinks, but isn't in the city. Maybe on the outskirts, in a suburb that isn't too far that is relatively cheaper drinks die bar type, or from a small town in Wisconsin. So,

Jenny, I think you know the vibe we're looking for. If you have any suggestions, I would appreciate it. Maybe I'm being too specific. Also, we plan to brunch it and mimosa it all day Sunday. If you got any tips, that would be great. Brook in Wisconsin, I don't really have. I mean, Minneapolis downtown is safer than you think, but if you're from small town Wisconsin and it's intimidating, it might not be for you. Plus, drinks are fucking expensive in downtown Minneapolis. They are.

I don't know a ton about like exactly what you're trying to look for. I will just plug probably Saint Louis Park, where I live. There's definitely airbnbs in the area. I don't know if you book someone one already, but Saint Louis Park would be good because you've got Bunnies bar and grill, and then also Park Tavern. Park Tavern's like a bowling alley sports bar that's really good, stars and stuff like that. So it's not your like hole

in the wall small town bar. You're not going to get a lot of those kind of bars in like the inner ring of suburbs of the Twin Cities. I mean, there's the Classic Couzies that's in the North Loop downtown that is like they've got the dollars all over the walls and stuff like that, but that's in the heart of downtown and the North Loop, so I would plug Saint Louis Park would be good. It's it's just that you're probably not going to find too many inner city suburbs that you could like walk to the

un bars. Yeah, the inner ring suburbs, sorry, but Saint Louis Park has a couple of good options. And then the West End area of Saint Louis Park has some really good brunch options too. Because I know she said she wants to do like mimosas on Sunday. So the shops at West End in Saint Louis Park, which is where we're located. They've got Hope Breakfast bar. You do have to get reservations in there. But then also the Block is in Saint Louis Park. That's kind of a little bit of

a newer restaurant. I think that they do like some brunch like Mimosa specials. I'm heading there on Sunday actually with Andrew's family for it's called the Block, Okay, And yeah, so I think like that's a good option. But I'm just not well versed because there's so many cities around Minneapolis. I don't know what to offer. I mean, I know chan Hassen, but I'm not going to send you all the way to chan Hasson. When I

heard of like brunch mimosas, I thought of Maynards on Lake Minnetonka. But they're moderately expensive and they're certainly not close to the inner loop of cities. There is Lush in the northeast. They are a gay bar and they're super fun too that you could do like a bron chat. If you had any ideas for Brook from Wisconsin, let us know you might be like, Oh, I know exactly what she wants and here's exactly the place for it,

so let me know. Send me an email. You got one week to get the poop stories in, then we're cutting them off, even though they're funny. Thanks for the emails, Thanks for listening to We really really appreciate it. I'm so glad you enjoyed the Minnesota goodbye, and thanks for listening. Send your emails to Ryan Show at KDWB dot com

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