Every day we do a podcast called The Minnesota Goodbye, and you have found it if you've never listened before, welcome. Basically, we spend fifteen to twenty five minutes or so reading emails and talking about stuff we can't say on the radio, and being a little bit more open about things like I'm gonna I'm gonna name the partners that I've had. We talked about our body count a little while ago. Okay, so I going to name them all. I know them all
in order, but here's the ones I have memorized. Hey, Vanessa Cricket, Kim, Kathy, Vicky, Candy, Linda, Mary, Melanie, Kelly, Tammy, April, Julie, Stephanie, Debbie, Debbie, Tammy, Patty, Debbie, Debbie, Chris, Rusty, Julie, Kathy, Melissa, Joan, don Nancy. Now, if you count them, that should be about twenty seven.
It sounded like you were reciting pie like three point one.
Four or five four two six four.
It felt very much like that.
So once again, in case you thought I just named random names, I'll say him again. Vanessa Cricket, Kim, Kathy, Vicky, Candy, Linda, Mary, Melanie, Kelly, Tammy, April, Julie, Stephanie, Debbie, Tammy, Patty, Debbie, Debbie, Chris, Rusty, Julie, Kathy, Melissa, Joan don Nancy.
Chris sounds cute?
Is he cute? Chris?
Was?
She? I met her because she was on a dating show on my radio show, and she met a guy and they went out to dinner. They were a total mismatch because she was fun and flirty and he was like, he was in the military, and he was kind of a nerd, but he was a nice guy, and so we started talking about her date and then we hit it off. And so Chris and I, this is back
in Vegas. I was probably like twenty two, and so she moved to Cassopolis, Michigan, and I lived in Ohio, and about a year or two later, she said, come up and see me for the weekend. So I said, okay, well great. You know, she said there was no GPS back then. So she said, my house is too hard to find. I will meet you at this hotel and then we'll go to my house. The hotel just happened to be easy to find.
Yeah.
So I walk in and I'm looking around for and I see her bent over the water fountain. Dreaming from the water fountain. I'm like, oh, there she is high, Chris. She turned around and she's pregnant as fuck. Oh my god, pregnant as fuck?
Is that your kid?
That's what I thought. Oh God, it was a pillow. It was a joke.
It was a joke, Chris.
This is what your podcast should be about, Dave. Just go through all of the hundreds of women. Concourse, give you another one.
Okay, So Sharon, Okay, Sharon was a listener. I enjoyed meeting and dating listeners to our radio show because we had something in common. We both love me. And Sharon was the one. Jenny knows this story where we were doing it on the dining room floor and she pooped during the middle of the whole thing. Yeah.
Sometimes you can't help yourself. I'm kidding, And you can help yourself.
Yeah. And then she picked it up and went back and threw it in the toilet and came back out, and I'm like, oh God, get out of my I.
Forget the details on this one. Did she think that you didn't see it? So she picked it up to try to like get rid of it quick and hope you didn't see her.
You want more details.
She details on everybody.
So she came over and she's very nice. We never really went out on a date. We just hooked up. But somehow instead of using the bed, we did it on the dining room floor. And I had glasses on, so I took my glasses off, and so we're doing it and then she finishes and I finish, and then I stand up and she stands up and I'm like, I didn't have my glasses on. I'm like, what's that on the floor And she goes, oh, and I put
my glasses on just as she was picking it up. Yeah, as well, you're not going to leave it there and go, oh my god, I shit on the floor. No, you're going to act like, oh well, this is the most natural thing ever. So she very like spontaneously picked it up and took it back to the bathroom through in the toilet, flush, the toilet washed, her hands, comes back out and she's like, well, what do you want to do now? And I'm like, die.
She definitely didn't think you saw it because you had your glasses off. She definitely was trying to probably hide it, don't you think.
I don't think that she knew anything else to do except just pick it up.
Which is are you positive it was poop or was it like a mouse?
Well, I've never thought of that possibility, but I don't think it was a mouse. Sure, do you want one more?
Yeah?
Can I pay? Go through them?
Gain?
Okay? Vanessa Cricket, Kim, Kathy, Vicky, Candy, Linda, Mary, Melanie, Kelly, Tammy, April Reulie, Melanie Okay, oh this is ugly.
Oh okay, great, Okay, I can't wait.
Melanie met when a bunch of us went to a drive in movie and Melanie, Melanie and I sat in the back and we were attracted to each other. We'd never met before. We started making out during the drive in movie us crazy in a car full of like six other people. What. Yeah, that's so weird?
How can continue on?
And uh? And so Melanie and I. She's very sweet and she I was supposed to go on over to a girl's house that I was seeing. Let's say it's Wednesday night. Let's say it's like, oh tonight, I'm supposed to go over to a girl's house that I'm seeing named Amy, and I forgot all about it because I was busy banging Melanie, and I forgot all about that. I was supposed to go over to Amy's parents' house because she live with her mom and dad. God, and
I didn't show up because I was banging Amy. No, I was banging Melanie.
Yeah, jeez.
And then I realized, Oh my god, I'm supposed to be over at Amy's house and I never showed up, and her mom and dad had got steak and they were going to grill out for us, and oh, poor poor Don. So here's a new feature on the show. You right in and say, name one of the first twenty seven women that I slept with, and I'll tell
you the story about them. Yeah, so once again. They are Vanessa, Cricket, Kim, Kathy, Vicky, Candy, Linda, Mary, Melanie, Kelly, Tammy, April, Julie, Stephanie, Debbie, Debbie, Tammy, Patt No, Stephanie, Debbie, Tammy, Patty, Debbie, Debbie, Chris, Rusty, Julie, Kathy, Melissa, Joan, don Nancy.
Oh, Rusty sounds cute? Was he cute?
Rusty was an eye doctor?
Oh? So?
Yeah? And her real name was Debbie, but she had red hair, but she was so she went by Rusty.
First boy I ever kissed was named Rusty?
Is that right?
Oh? I had a Rusty in my grade too, what's so funny? We all have a rusty. I didn't kiss him or anything like that, red hair. He did it and mine did. One thing I want to take from that list is I had no idea that cricket was only your second, but.
As a cricket cam.
Yeah, so you got your second lady pregnant?
Yeah yeah, I mean basically, yeah, Jay boy, send me an email and name a woman and I will tell you the story woman, And they're all none of them are meant to be disrespectful because we all had a great time. We really, we really had. All of us had a great time. I can't think of.
One yourshead pick a random one, and I couldn't even if I named any name.
Would you have somebody?
Mark?
Andy? Who? Andy Marcus? Okay, let's see Philip, Michael, No, Thomas Well William, yes, okay, tell us about will William.
Let's go.
Okay, So I actually went to high school with this person and he was like really really cool in high school, but then he came to the Twin Cities metro area for college. Yeah, and he he became kind of like hipstery like the beer or he's kind of nice and whatever. And then he started reaching out to me once I got into radio, and I was like, I'll catch up
with him whatever. But we had had a couple of drinks and he watched me to my car and then he like aggressively kissed me at my car and I wasn't really prepared for it, and I was like, and so afterwards, I said, you're welcome.
Sure, welcome, You're welcome, You're welcome.
And I was like, yeah, because I just gave you a fantastic kiss that I was not anticipating.
But that was it.
I never like had any sexual relations with him.
Okay, well then what about Philip, Yeah, Phillip, Thomas Brett, No Brett. What about Brett he sounds hot?
No, No Brett. Honestly, I would really have to look at my list of names because I am like blanking on most of the people right now that I've slept with. I mean, there's like definitely people who stand out to me. Yeah, and there's like a couple names that if I said them, I feel like too many people in the Twin Cities would maybe know who they are because they have very not too many people, but they stand out. Sure, and if we're in the same age range, you might know
who they are. Sure, I have supple some golf for football players, so like, oh my god, I feel like those names. I'm not gonna celebrities back in my college days.
Well I know, I know. Yeah, Okay, here we go random topics and let's get started from Sarah. I do not use tide laundry detergent. We talked about this yesterday. How nearly what he does several years ago is introduced to Mela Luca, which is an online shopping club of clean products. I love the quality of the products and knowing I'm not bringing in unnecessary chemicals into my home, I order them all my laundry, dish cleaning supplies, toothpape, etc.
From them. Have you heard of them or tried their products? Mela Luca, m E l A l e Uca. No, I don't know anything about them. It might be worth checking out. I did hear yesterday, and I don't know if we get to the email or not, but somebody who they work repairing washing machines and they say that like commercial detergents are full of animal fat. Those are what break down your washer because it'll get coated on all the inside parts with animal fat. Like you're tied.
It's got a lot of animal fat.
I did not know that.
I didn't know that either. Oh, and that will come up your your your appliances, and that cause them to break down earlier.
It probably gets in like the fibers of your clothing, all of that kind of jazz.
And they say, also, you don't need fabric softener. Fabric softener is not something anybody needs.
I've never used that.
Is there one practical item in your house that brings you joy? I ordered an ironing board wall mounted rack that also has a shell for the iron. I was laughing at how excited I was to put it up and show it off. But now my mudroom closet it's a bit more organized and looks so nice. Oh the joys of getting older practical item in Yeah, the vacuum, I don't know. I like vacuuming lines in the carpet.
I this was I mean my ex boyfriend who just moved out had two different kinds of steamers, so one is for clothes, which was amazing. I could steam all of my clothes instead of ironing anything.
It was awesome.
And then he also had like a steamer for your mouth, so like if you were sick, you could steam your like throat and it would make you feel so much better, so much quicker. And now both of those steamers are gone. So I need two steamers. I need a closed steamer and a throat steamer.
I want to get a seapap. Speaking of steamers, I want to get a seapap so I can sleep on my back. Yeah, So tell me if you get a seapap, what is the process? What do you have to do to get one?
After the doctor you have to take like a sleep study. You don't want to It doesn't take that long though. It literally takes like a freaking day, So you have.
To like go to the doctor.
That sounds like a long time.
No, you have all the time in the world. Get a freaking seapaps.
You can sleep better and remember things better because it changes your life and remember things better. Okay, soho no no, no.
No, no, no, I'm saying that in general.
So like, so, my ex boyfriend also had a seapap, and he said that he doesn't remember a lot of what happened. In college because he wasn't sleeping right, so he didn't have the oxygen going to his brain. But now he can remember things so much better now that he has a seapap, and his like quality of life like went up exponentially because he could finally like sleep.
My thing is I sleep great, but I wake up because I cannot sleep on my back because when I go to sleep on my back, my throat relaxes, I snore and wake myself Upright, I have to sleep on my side, and when I do, I have bad shoulders. Apparently I get sore after one hour on each side, so every hour I have to wake up and turn over.
Yeah, so I want to sleep on my back just instead of wasting time waking up and turning over. Waste a day by getting a sleep study and get yourself a seapap, because.
You do have to take life.
Really, I really should you should?
Uh?
Next one from the same email, have Jenny and Vant made up? I feel like they weren't hearing each other and both got defensive. I love the authenticity even though it was an awkward moment.
You knew works just like siblings and you get over things.
Yeah, they weren't even really mad at each other. They were both kind of playing it up a little bit just to kind of like be dramatic. I think that is it for now, says Sarah, trying to do my part as a staff writer, especially now that I have more time as I was recently laid off for my job. Now that I'm able to listen longer, I'm noticing how the bits are repeated during the different show time hours. That begs the question, are any of you working that hard?
Keep up the great work? You know. It's funny because people don't expect us to do replays, But for years and years and years on the radio show, it was always like, well we do a bit at seven to ten. Everybody hears it because everybody certainly listens to the entire four hours of the show. Right. Turns out, no, no, It turns out most people listen for like twenty minutes, and they listen for the same twenty minutes every day.
When I come in, I'm in the car with the radio on, sometimes not all the time, from five thirty to about five point fifty, and when I go home, I'm in the car for about twenty minutes. I'm not listening to the whole four hours of Fallon and Colt.
I'll listen to a little bit, and so people don't if we do a great bit at seven twenty, the people listening at nine to ten, they have not heard it exact so we do a replay because it's quality stuff and a lot of the time, if you've heard it once, you don't really mind hearing it again.
Yeah, if it's quality, Yeah, it's quality.
All right, Thanks Sarah, I appreciate that one. Here is Sharise, Hello, my favorite morning show. I'm writing about two things today. Dave said everybody uses Tide. It's not true. I use pure X, are all free and clear. We are allergic too Tide and we break out in a rash. Also, I think a few weeks ago you were discussing the scam where people think they're dating a celebrity. Well, I
have another one people should be aware of. It's on dating sites where you meet somebody, you think you're hitting it off, and after a few days they ask you for money so they can invest it for you. Oh, it's happened to me three times in the last week. This is just info for single listeners in case they haven't heard it. And also Bailey, what's the dating trend you were talking about. That's kind of like speed dating, Oh.
Shuffle dating.
They just sent out a new email for November dates, and I am considering it, but I'm also skei ot oh, I want you to do it.
I know I don't want you to put yourself in an uncomfortable situation, but I think it'd be fun.
It's very you. I feel it. It does feel like me. I feel like if I could get a friend to go with me, then I would do it for sure.
I thinks somebody I really like this saying that might encourage you. It is the things that we fear most that we must do, and I think that's true. It's like I don't to quit my job, or I don't want to get a divorce, or I don't want to go on this date. But I think the things that we fear most that we must do because they make the biggest changes in our lives.
Yeah, if anything, it'll be a good story, So that's probably all that matters.
I think, you know, I think that you could do well much better than just a good story.
Oh well, we'll see. I guess I don't know.
Good morning, Dart liquors. My first email right into the podcast, sparked by a pretty interesting moment that happened on the show Tuesday. I know you guys like to joke and disparage one another in slapstick fashion, but I could not help it feel furious with Vaughnt's comments about Jenny and her hard work. Again, I know you guys joke around, but this one felt different. It's a real shame to see a valued member of the Morning show get demean
by another member. As from what I can tell, everybody chips in their own way, and it should all be class chips in in their own way, and you all do hard work. Vaugh's comments really struck me. And I know Jenny has been dealing with mental health challenges and to have Vaunt ridicule her was truly disgusting. Sorry for the long ramp, but I really care about each member except Vat on the show. Well, Henry, I will go ahead and tell you that a lot of that was
just for fun. Yeah, I mean it really was. It's like he did say it, But then Bailey and I didn't help by piling on yeah, and I said things like, oh, well, yeah, Jenny, you've given all your work to Vaunt and Bailey, and it was definitely one of those things that maybe if you could have seen us and you could see us smiling and laughing, you would have maybe seen that it was more fun.
I feel like we don't usually take what we say seriously. Like if Dave told me I was an ugly moron, I'd be like, well, you're an ugly moron. I wouldn't like go home and cry about it because I know he's teasing me.
And also I think like my side of the conversation became more like competitive than anything than like defensive. I was like getting competitive with it where I was I might have sounded a little bit angry, but like, I know it's all in fun and games and this is our show, and I know probably doesn't actually feel that way about me.
And I don't think you're an ugly moron. Just a moron, Oh, just a moron.
Cool.
You're you're kind of hot. I told you that for years of hard got years. But I think that you're kind of hot. And you don't give yourself credit for being kind of hot. Here's the problem with that. One day, when you're old, you're going to look back at you at this age and go, fuck, I was kind of hot and I wasn't out sleeping with like everybody on the Gophers football team like I could have, Jenny did, Dad, you could have hooked up with everybody on the Gophers football Okay.
Club, Okay, well I'll go meet the Gophers football by Jenny to go with me, hold my hands so they'll be like, wow, Bailey knows, Jenny, we heard about Jenny.
Brother slept with you.
Yeah.
All right, here's another one writing in your discussion about knowing when it's time to put your dog down. I've been wondering with Josie and I'm not even close, but it is, you know. I was telling Jenny that and Bailey too. But Jenny is especially fond of dogs, and so Josie. She's fifteen and a half, and she was outside last night. I put her out before bedtime, and we have two stairs that she has to hop up on. She has to hop up onto the porch and then
into the doorway. So she comes, you know, walking rather briskly back up the porch when she's done, and I'm watching for her, and she makes the first leap and she misjudged the second leap onto the into the doorway. She leaped too soon and didn't make it into the door and landed on the step on her little belly and then she landed and she rolled over and fell and it was just so pathetic. But she wasn't hurt, and I'm like, oh, and I had to help her up, and so it just you know, it's just, you know,
you watch for things like that. As far as the sores that she has. If it's what I'm thinking, I've had dogs with them. It's common and old dogs and it doesn't bother them. Sounds like she still has some things she loves in life and quality to do it. She does absolutely loves her treats. She loves to eat. She took her around a two mile walk last night. Up just fine. I had to put my soul dog down in March. He was in and out of the emergency vet with multiple bouts of pneumonia. The last time
was bad and he wasn't responding well. I told my husband, I know he's tired and done and it isn't fair to keep him putting him through this. As devastated as I was to lose him, especially because he was only eight, I still miss him terribly. I know it was the right decision, Dave. You'll know when Josie is tired and ready to be done. She's your girl, and you know her best. Oh my gosh, emotional, Yeah, I do know her best. Yeah. To attempt to end on a positive note,
Hopefully she still has happy times ahead with her. She does. Thanks for all you guys do love the show. PS vaunt is wrong. Jenny works hard and he would be lost without her. Smile emoji, thank you, Sarah. Teresa rights in Hi. Nothing salacious or riveting, But I had a quick question just for fun. If somebody handed you a baby today and ask you to name it, what would you choose? First and middle? Grace Louise, Grace Louise, Yeah, Grace Louise. I always want a girl named Grace or
a boy named Jackson. So be Jackson Gunner, Jackson Gunner or Grace Louise.
I if I have a son Albert Clark, I like that.
Okay, okay, gosh Cooper for the first name. But middle name that I have to think about that one. Cooper Charles nice because Cooper doesn't sound very prestigious, but Charles does. Cooper Charles.
Girls names I like Ruby. I've always liked Ruby. But I had a great aunt Lottie, and so I really like Lottie too.
But I don't know Lotti. How do you spell that?
Lott I e greant aunt Lottie.
Hold On, I'm sending a staff writer noticed to Secretary breed Jack and there we go, Teresa, we will send you your staff writer sticker. Next one, you guys are talking about brand loyalty. My brand I'll never substitute is old home cut cheese. The dark blue container is better than any other kind that ever existed. It just sucks, though, because one cord of it rank racks up to be like seven bucks. But there is no other choice for me, so it's either I pay or I don't get it.
Then the subject of cereal came up or later to day, because when I was a kid, my mom would always get raisin bran and none of us four kids liked it, but my dad loved it, so he always got all of it because it wouldn't get eaten. And it related to Jenny when she said that they can't just have a little cereal. No matter what kind I get, it always up ends up being a big bowl. Then it's gone in three days, especially because the boxes get smaller
and smaller, so I just don't buy any at all. Now, what you don't know, Bailey and Jenny is when you were a kid and there was no cell phone, you ate your breakfast in the kitchen, probably not in front of the TV. Cereal box backs used to be prime reading material. Yeah, for a kid. Do you remember this?
Yeah?
They were games and so all right.
I didn't know that, but when I was a kid, Yeah, the cereal box back and sometimes if you got bored, you'd read the ingredients like nyasin and vitamin aiaow on the side. But yeah, they used to be full of reading material and puzzles and games and things like that. All right, I got some few, a few more emails that I want to get to and let's see. No, no, somebody sent in some pictures of them getting engaged at the Renaissance Festival. Wow, and they're a very cute couple
and they're totally garbed out. The reason this came up is because Group Therapy was about the woman who got engaged at the Renaissance Festival and she hated every minute of it, and so we thought that was kind of funny and so you guys, what an attractive couple. I mean, I can't see his face, but she is very attractive and that is super cool, all right. Next one, Hello
Morning show crew. I own a local dog training company and I oftentimes get brought in as an expert for my clasciences as far as behavior, and my go to response is similar to what you guys are saying. Whenever the quality of your life has gotten to the point where she doesn't enjoy doing what she has done in the past, and if you have to force her to eat,
that it's time to let her go. Dogs have no concept of how long they're supposed to live, so they don't know if they're supposed to die tomorrow or live another ten years. So as long as we keep them happy and enjoy what they're doing, it's fair to keep them around. Can I do something very unusual on the podcast?
Sure?
I really want to have somebody on on the actual show, So I'm going to bring this up now that we don't normally plan the show. During the Minnesota Goodbye, there's a couple of things I want to make sure that we get to. One is having a veterinarian or a dog expert on to talk about how you know, because I want to know when Joe and Josie still got some time. Yeah, but there's a lot of people. If you own a dog, you've either been through it or you will go through it. And I think it's just
really valuable information. Also, Vaught has not done the bit am I invited? Are you invited to the cookout?
Oh?
Yeah, And that's the one where he hasked questions about black culture and if you get it right, then you are invited to the cookout. Yes, And we haven't done that in a while.
We just haven't been able to because we don't have a giveaway for it because the gay right now keywords, that's why we haven't done it in a little while. We'll get to it the next time we have a contest that doesn't involve keywords.
Well five okay, and I think let me scroll down a little bit and see whether there's anything else, because sometimes we get yeah, that's that's going to do it. So thank you for the emails to the Minnesota Goodbye. If we didn't get to yours, it's because we either didn't get to it, which we will try later, or we had a lot of emails on the same thing, but sometimes we don't mind different perspectives, Like I got a lot on Josie and her enjoyment of life, so
we'll probably continue to cover that. Any ideas for the show, maybe you want to send in one of those women's names and I will tell you the story behind them. Name another one, Bailey, Vanessa, Creaket camc. I think Picky Candy, Linda, Mary Milaney, Kathy. She was married, okay, And she called the radio station and I'm like, Hi, how are you. She's like, oh, I just got here from San Diego. And I'm like, does anybody show you a good time in Colorado? Since she got here? And so I met her.
I took her out, and then she told me that she was married, and I'm like, what the fuck? So she never told me she was married until after the fact.
Okay, Like, so when you say you took her out, that means you were like doing it. And then she was by the way.
Yeah, I took her. We took her. I took her out. We had a couple of drinks, we went I'd lived at home, so we went back to my mom and dad's house, sneaked into the basement. Oh wow, hooked up and then we fell asleep.
How old were you?
Nineteen? She was eighteen.
She was eighteen.
She was married with a kid.
What yeah, Oh my god.
And so I woke up. It's daylight. I could hear mom and dad rattling around upstairs.
Oh my god.
And I'm like, I've got to sneak this person out of my house past mom and Dad. So I sneaked her up the stairs. They were in the kitchen. We were three stairs below the kitchen. Sneaked her out the back door, walked her through the backyard, took her into the front yard, got into my car, started it up. By this time, Mom and Dad absolutely heard me start the car. And I know they saw me pull off with some girl in the car.
Oh my god.
They never said every one of Who's got a story?
Yeah, that's why I'm saying, you can make each of these into a podcast.
Yeah, today's episode what's the Number?
Hey, everybody, welcome back to What's your Number? Dave and Jenny.
Okay, And if you want to send that's fine. If you want to send in a name for Jenny to see whether she's ever hooked up with a Robert that maybe says a story about Robert.
No Roberts, but I'm gonna have to go look at my list tonight.
See let us know. We'll see you tomorrow on the Minnesota Goodbye Email Ryan Show at KDWB dot com