If I Were 30 Years Younger...

Let's dive into the Minnesota goodbye already.

Yeah.

Do you find yourself saying y'all more often?

Y'all all the time?

Too? Yeah? I thought it was so stupid when it kind of caught on a year or so ago, and now I say it more often. But I also don't want to sound stupid y'all.

No, I don't think you sounds stupid. I say y'all all the time.

Okay, because here's an email that starts off with hey, y'all, just a story for you. I want to share because it was one of my biggest fears that it happened. I went to the Blink one eighty two concert on Tuesday. We had nosebleed seats way up in the top section. We're walking to our seats. We're talking about how our knees get shaky because it's so steep and high up. So Blink one eighty two is on stage. I'm singing along. All of a sudden, my life is flashing before my eyes.

Wow.

I really thought I was going to tumble all the way down. It was so scary. My sister and I were able to have a good laugh about it later because it was one of those things that you just can't believe happened. To be safe out there, everyone from the Lexi. I guess there's an argument over who is the Lexi.

It's probably my friend Lexi.

What's her last name? That's her? Yeah, oh wow, that is the Lexilexi. Yeah, thank you, Lexei. Appreciation that.

I'm sorry you almost died at the blank when you two concerts.

It is scary. It's one of those things because you know, you think about your walking and the rows of the seats in front of you probably come up to mid calf level. Yeah, and if somebody were to push you or lose your balance, you would absolutely fall and be tripped by that sat.

A concerts or like at a Twins game. If you're in the nosebleed seats anywhere, I always feel like I'm gonna and you get like that sensation of falling forward, even if you're not falling forward, you're like, I'm about to fall into Yeah, exactly, I'm about to jump. That's a thing.

Oh no, it is, yeah, all right.

Next one says hey y'all again. Another one starts with hey, y'all, I'm currently on a train from Prague to Vienna. I was supposed to attend the first night of Taylor Swift's concert in Vienna. Unfortunately, those shows were canceled due to a planned terrorist attack. Luckily all the suspects are now under police supervision. Just wanted to say I'm listening to the Minnesota Goodbye and it's making me laugh and smile

Yeah, we figured it out. I fixed it. It's it's a it doesn't matter. I don't have to explain it because it would be boring.

But but we do. But it was as an error on our part.

Yeah, Well, one was an error on yours and one was an error on me. So we shared the errors.

Tell me what I did wrong and I didn't do it again.

Sport it the right way or something. I don't know. Oh, yours was an export thing and mine was like I imported it and click to save too quickly before it was done downloading, and yours hadn't.

I want to tell you, I'm impressed with what you've learned in the last two or three months here on the show, because you had no idea with like audio and loading and podcasting and look at you now.

Well the loading thing, I mean, it's no different than loading an Instagram picture, really, isn't that? It's just your loading audio instead.

I'm very blessed because I don't do any of that stuff. I am like, I don't know. I don't know how to do the uploading and the voice tracking and things like that. I don't know voice tracking.

I'm still getting the hang of that stuff so hard. I feel so bad for Vaught, and then he sits in the room with me and then has to hear me complain about it.

I don't know how to voice. Voicetrack is basically here's a little behind the curtain thing. With a lot of radio stations. We're live every morning, but there's a lot of shows that are not live but are made or sound live. So you'll sit in a studio in Cleveland or Tallahassee, and you will record and upload to a computer the voice parts of a radio show, and then you will load them and mix them in with the song.

I don't admit that, but it's okay. We love our Minnesota Goodbye listeners, so we'll fill you in on there.

I would never say it on the radio. Yeah, Well, that's one of the advantages of listen to the Minnesota goodbyees. You're gonna hear shit that I shouldn't tell.

You because you're at the point now where you just don't give a shit and tell you another story.

Well, I kind of no, I still give a shit, and I'm proud of that. I'll tell you a story that I should not tell you. Paola in radio is illegal. So in other words, if like there's a new I don't know cameilic Abeo song, the record company that manages Medala Cameo cannot come to us or the boss and say hey, I give you five hundred dollars and you play a record twelve times. That's illegal. You also can't award somebody with a trip. You can't say, hey, I'll fly you out to go see you know, I don't know,

Is paola Like if they say, hey, I want to say you this item, Like if I want to send you a fridge, but you have to play this, that's pail. So it's a I'll give you this if exactly, yeah, give you this.

You can't exchange anything for airplay. Sure, what you can do is you can give, like you know, the boss or any of us, free concert tickets. But there's never any implication that that will result in anything in return. So in the words, I can go to dinner with the guy who works at Warner Brothers Records or the woman who works at Universal Records, but there can never be any implied return favor. Sure, you take me to dinner, butter me up, make me, make me your friend.

But I'm not going to give you any But I'm not going to give you anything.

So okay, it's a weird thing, all right, don't say a name. Thanks for saying that up front. I found myself compelled to respond to something school related that I heard on the show. I'm just not brave enough to be on the real show, so I'm messaging the Minnesota goodbye. Somebody was talking about back to school teacher gifts and a teacher texts it in and said the only thing they wanted was for parents to be parents. Yes, and shout out to improv Bailey, So yes and yep, I

Wow.

Thanks for providing a safe space for me in a chaotic world. Anonymous Minnesota teacher. I've heard that so many times. I've had two teachers in my family that both quit because of that shit. Yeah, and they just said, I love teaching and most of the kids in my class are wonderful, But all it takes is a couple or three or four kids that disrupt constantly that ruin the entire experience.

And parents that don't care that their kid is disrupting constantly.

Some parents are arrogant and say, my kid would never and some parents don't give a shit. They just don't. They're absent parents. School is like a babysitter.

M And that's what's annoying is that teachers aren't babysitters. So like teachers shouldn't necessarily be teaching your kid how to be a good person. That should be you. They're teaching them math and history, not how to not be a piece of shit right.

Well, back in my day, Back in my day, if the teacher told you, David, sit down and shut up, you did it, because if you didn't, you'd go to the principal's office. And if you went to the principal's office, that often resulted in a note home to your mother or a phone call or a call to your dad that says, David's been a little asshole, Come by and pick him up, and then then you're in real trouble. Dad would be driving and smacking me upside the head the entire time. Now I made that part up.

Did you ever get hit at school?

Though?

My dad got hit with a ruler. Oh yeah, when he would like tom fool around.

There was a large refrigerator box in our classroom in first grade. Somehow a friend of mine boosted me. Now, a refrigerator box is a lot taller than a first grader. A friend of mine boosted me up, and I fell into the refrigerator box. And I was inside the refrigerator box. The teacher was like, that made a rule, don't I don't know why we had a refrigerator box. I don't know, but I fell in and I was laughing. My friends were laughing. The teacher tipped the box over, pulled me

It, Yeah, because you were farting around in class.

I was Yeah, ever get spanked in school or hit in school? Jenny, No, never.

Yeah, this wasn't a thing by the time we were say, I don't think.

I mean I was spanked as a child by my parents rarely because I was a pretty decent kid.

Yeah, but now I was just like, well, I turned out all right. My mom would just mostly say that she was going to come and spank us if we were bad, and then never come into the room. So they're just like living in fear. Yeah.

I got spanked, and I spanked both of my kids a couple of times, and it was the most pathetic thing ever because they tried. I remember last time I spank Carson. I don't know if he was four or six, I don't remember. And I spanked my kids. I could count on one hand the number of times I spanked both of them. And Carson had done something. I said, you're going to get a spanking, So I tried to

No, that's like the total kid move, though I remember trying to do that too.

Cover in my cheeky's.

You're like, if I put my hands over it, they can't get to it, and you.

Just feel so off because you're like violating their little protective space. And yeah, okay, long time listener, first time emailing in. I've been listening to the morning show in Minnesota Goodbye. I started listening in middle school and have felt grown attached since you guys are a great comfort and company while I'm at work. I love vaunting Bailey on the show and Bailey on the Minnesota Goodbye Thanks Uh, and I love where did It Go Here? I think

Just like self deprecation that we all do.

Yeah. Yeah, I mean also, you give me crap for being by myself all the time, so I'm fuel on the fire.

But you are by yourself all the time exactly. Yeah. Oh, anyway, I hope they don't take this as negativity, just saying how I feel. I hope you have a great day, and Bailey, don't be so down on yourself. You're great, Bailey, You're great.

Okay, are you going to start telling me that, Dave?

Well, yeah, I tell you.

If you're not going to change, then I'm not.

No, I do tell you. I say that you are well. I think I tell you that you're attractive and you're fun and desirable. Going to tell you on the.

Air, Well, then people won't be upset that I am being self deprecating because I'm just piling onto what you're saying because that's a bit.

Yeah. Well I did. Okay, let me let me start right right now. Okay, Bailey, you are, you are attractive. Thank you, you are fun. If I were thirty years younger, I wouldn't date you, but I would find somebody that would want to date you. Okay, See that was fun though, right because you thought I was going to say I would date.

You, because that would have been weird. If I were thirty years younger, i'd date you, that'd be weird.

It's a big age gap. Yeah, if I was five years younger, I would date. Yeah, you would totally date a five year younger, Dave Ryan, No, yeah, you would know. Everybody would dat anybody. I could go down to the u of M. I'd go down to the quad. What's it called at the uf M? The quad?

But what is the super block? The goes there anymore? Or the commons to.

The common to the um is the main go to the mall. If I's five years younger, I'd go down to the comment of the u of M. I'd be swimming in it.

No, you wouldn't look at me, No, you wouldn't.

They'd be like, I am looking, sir, which class do you teach here?

Oh?

You big, you look like a professor.

May They'd give you a garbage one of those garbage cans on the rollers and they'd be like, get back to work, janitor man.

I was like, what all right? So next one. Hello you beautiful people. I want to let you know, first of all, you really do brighten many people's lives. I know that you might know that already, but you're making a difference for many people. Uh to just tune out of the chaos, even for a moment, and into something lighthearted and fun. Thank you. Nah. I'm reminding Bailey to remind Dave to bring in the vest that he made. I've got to see a picture of it. So I

And mine now and I said, you can have it.

I don't. I don't. It's not that I don't want it, but when I die, the kids will look at it and go, do you want Dad's down vest that he made in ninth grade? I don't know. Probably not.

I should probably have you sign it, though why I don't know. So I remember that that.

Yes, exactly, what do you want from your mom or dad when they're gone? When I was a little kid, my dad had a beautiful, old, old, old roll top desk, and I said, that's mine when he's gone, and I've got it in my basement. Now, problem is nobody wants it when I'm gone. What do you want from your mom or your dad that they own a family heirloom? Jenny, that you want, we don't.

Really have heirlooms.

I would say, I would just want all of my mom's recipes that I grew up having.

That's like the main one.

I just had her send me one today for something I'm making for the weekend at the Bachelor at party. So I would say that my dad's a hoarder, so I'm sure there's like a million things I'm going to end up getting from him, and I'm going to sell everything on Facebook marketplace.

I do worry, though, I mean, at a point in my life where you start to think about, well, what are my kids going to do when I'm gone, and all the crap that I don't want them to have to clean out because if I were to die tomorrow, they'd have a shit ton of stuff yeah to clean out, and I don't want to leave them with that. So I got rid of my unicycle and my down vesty. I'm doing well.

You're on your way.

Next, she says. Third, I got a bone to pick with iHeart. Okay, this should be good. It is complete fucking bullshit that the best radio show iHeart owns has shitty fucking equipment. It is seriously fucking sucks. Dick. Oh, the Minnesota you'd buy is cut off at tennis minutes all too often, or it doesn't record, or whatever else happens. It really sucks as a huge fan of the show to be served a lukewarm, slightly overcooked, chewy flank steak instead of a medium rare, piping hot, juicy woggu Ribi

I don't I wouldn't even know the difference between that nice question.

This is a very analogue So everything in front of us is before the age of digital anything. Everything in front of us is very analog, except the one unit that we record the Minnesota Goodbye on is a digital recorder. But it literally is nineteen ninety four technology. Oh really, and so yeah and so, and we do have some computers in here, but we don't have the most modern update. So but you know, we've gotten so used to it.

But then imagine if you're driving this ninety four Camra and then suddenly someone gives you one of those like teslas. Yeah, and then you'll be like, I don't know what to do.

Yeah, how does this work? That'll be me right, yeah. Fourth, I love the Newish vont and Bailey can't play the new Kid cards anymore. Additions, it is so obvious why the ratings are going up, and I hope every one of the show is appreciated for it. I do have one issue with Vaughnt. He's not here, but let's talk shit about him. I'm sure it's just one of those things that he doesn't realize, but once I heard it,

We did.

Yeah, maybe that's his thing, but I'm constantly on edge waiting for it because it sounds like a large breed of dog vomiting. I listened last Monday's podcast on a long solo drive and I tallied on my hand how many times he did it. Four times on the regular show and one time on the Minnesota Goodbye. It was too much. Anyway, I hope this gives you some content to chat about while you're working and jerking your way

I mean, at what year did he stop doing it?

I don't know, probably in the last ten or fifteen years.

O say, I feel like that's like such an old bit, like get naked, let's go drinking, baby.

Right, and then the stealing the clothes thing. That's hilarious.

Unother one, let's see here, I want to see whether there's a place now. I'm not going to read that one. It's a little bit negative about something political, so I'm not going to do that one. Next one, Dave Jenny Bailey and listened to the podcast you're talking about Life three sixty and Carson, that's an app that I used to follow. Carson. I'm a parent of grown adults too. My daughters are twenty two and twenty seven and we

Wait, what's Pike going simple law.

There's a bunch more basically, who are supporting the following your kids on Life three sixty And this one is a totally different one from Melissa. She said, I'm thirty five. If my parents would attract me, I would have been furious and probably gotten a lot of trouble. But now I have a sixteen year old son and we use a tracking app on his cell phone. It's on my phone, my husband's phone. We use it as a family. He checks where we are, we check where he is, and

You do, bless the darts.

Let's see. I think that's about all we have time for right now. But if we didn't get to your Minnesota goodbye email, we are going to try. I think I have time for one more. Let's do one more, Danielle, I usually listen to the replay the Morning Show podcast. I've noticed the last couple of weeks War of the Roses has not been added to the podcast, and wondering if we can get those posted somehow, or if there's a reason for this. Does anybody know War the Roses on like one on the regular podcast?

No those should be in there.

Okay, yeah, well that's a vont thing unless Spont's not here.

Well, but War the Roses should be in the main show podcast.

I know too. Yeah, I don't take it out.

Yeah okay. Also, I just wanted to say I love you guys. You make my day and I listen to you every day at work and it helps me get through the day. One more thing on the topic I've written about, however, I was curious if you guys have ever heard of the artist Asston. There are a couple of songs by her that I absolutely love, and I'm surprised at least one of them has never made it on the radio. At least I'm not aware of it.