Here we go with a flurry of Minnesota goodbye emails. But we're first going to start off with Jannita. It's been a week or so since we had onan Nita on the show, and I think I've got her cued up and ready to go. You're ready for Juanita? Ye, you're okay. Let me find it, And here comes Juanita with her weekly rant.
Hey, hey, my.
Favorite radio crew. Just to let you know how much of an influence you guys have on me now. Every time I go to work and my boss asks me to do something that I don't want to do it don't feel like doing, I just look at him and I go, H good bit, and I turn around and I walk away. He gets the fucking pissed every time I do that because he doesn't understand where it's coming from.
My bit.
But this week's runs about stupid shit that they invent. So I was listening to a past podcast of the Morning Show that I had missed one morning, and I heard this commercial for a squatty potty. I thought it was a bit that you all came up with, so I looked it up and sure enough, there is a such thing. It's a contraption that you're sitting in front of your toilet that looks like a kid's step stool you're supposed to put your feet on, and it says the number one way to have a better number two.
That's the dumbest shit I ever heard. I've been taking a shit for fifty two years with my feet on the floor. Why all of a sudden, what ding dong sat on the toilet and said, oh my god, I can't get this load out. What could I do?
Oh?
Maybe if I put my feet up up? Yep, there she blows. I mean called. I ranked this right up here with the goddamn clapper and the chia pet. Why the fuck would I want a John Travolta head with grass hair coming out in my living room? I don't think so, but I posted. I tagged the link of the squatty partty in this email. I want you guys to take a look at it and let me know. Would you buy some shit like this? No pun intended. Well that's my rent for this week. Love you guys. Bye.
Might have been my favorite.
One side to Jenny, who I know owns one.
No, I don't.
I don't own one.
I just have a built in one because our bathtub I have a very small bathroom in our bathtubs right there, so I can just put my feet up on the bathtub, so it's built in. But my sister has one at my mom's house because she lives at home currently. So when I go home, I use that bad boy. It was up in our Christmas exchange last year and I had it for a little bit and someone stole it from me, so I'm all about it. I listen Wandi to.
I get where you're coming from. But I feel like it's one of those don't knock until you try it kind of situations because it really does help with your system. Now, if you're just a naturally like give rapler, yeah, gifted pooper, I guess you could say you're not going to need it, but some of us just don't have those gifts. So squatty potties are very helpful for certain people.
She did send the link. You can buy it on Amazon. It's called the squatty Potty and it is basically just picture a rectangular shaped plastic school stool about eight inches high with a half moon cut out of it. Sure other words, it wraps around the toilet bowl you stand on it, then you squat down, and then your ass is at a different angle. And I'm going to read the description the number one way to go number two. Human bodies perform more efficiently if we squat instead of
sit when we poop. Squatty potty toilet stools help you reduce strain and time spent on the toilet unkink. Your colon doctor recommended toilet stool to reposition your body into a squat from ninety degrees to thirty five degrees to loosen you puberl like of rectalis muscle for a more efficient elimination, helps you poop better. It is made of sturdy plastic and designed to work with standard toilets, typically found at a height of fourteen to sixteen inches from
the floor. And blah blah, blah blah blah.
That she thought that that was a bit that we came up with.
Well, it sounds like a bit gotsheet.
It does rich if we came up with the squatty botty What.
If I's been around for a while.
Yeah, I like them. I think they're cute.
I don't own one, but I have been in a home that has one, and I just think, well, it's not gonna hurt me to put my feet up, So I guess I'll put my feet up.
Yeah, I mean, I guess it's something net of the commercials we run them on KTWB and they say, get more poop out. I'm like, well, how much is left in there anyway?
You know what I mean?
Or no, probably a lot.
I'm gonna go up there with the scope next time. I'm going to go up there with the scope and see how much is left up there on kink your calling.
Remember when a company reached out and had fallen and I go in to do something where they like massage your stomach and they put a tube up your butt.
Oh my god, and they will get.
Everything out what happened. So, I mean that's literally what it is. They like massage your stomach and your intestines and then they like push like the gunk and the shit out of you, and then it goes out through this tube. And afterwards they have you go sit on the toilet and they use a squatty potty for it. They're like, you more is gonna come out?
Yeah?
Okaylan was in and out of there like twenty minutes before me. I was in that bathroom in fucking struggling, writhing pain for like twenty minutes, sitting on the with that my feet on the squatty potty, and they're like, and then make sure I'm sorry, this is so tm I. They're like, make sure you stand up and you walk around a little bit once you think you're done, because you're not done. And I was like, you're right, I wasn't when I sit back down.
The whole point of it was it.
Just it's clear it's to clear out your system. But because Fallon is a lucky person who's regular, it was a much easier process, sure versus me. But honestly, you'd have to google it interest. I didn't do a ton of research. I just went in and I was like, cool, they're going to get some shit out of here.
Yeah.
I think it sounds like one of those businesses. I mean, I hope they've thrived and done well, but it sounds like one of those that will open up and close up within six months. Because who's going to go there regularly? I mean, no pun intended, but I mean you might go in once for the novelty of it all, but are you gonna go back every week?
Kind of like a novelty.
No, I don't think it's something that you'd have to go back for every week. It's not like going to get your nails done, you know, like you go in and you get like it's supposed to help your system get back on a regular treasure.
That's what it comes back.
Yeah, So they're not trying to have you come in every week. They're trying to get your system into a healthy place where you don't have.
To go there.
I wonder if they're still in business. I'd be curious to know if anybody knows. Google intuh next one? Here we go. I've been meaning to write in about the number of Chicken restaurants and Apple Valley. It has been brought up a few times that Dave's son in law
will eat at KFC because he feels bad for them. Honestly, Canes needs to buy that property and make it into a parking lot because at the corner of c art County Road forty two and seventy seven on I'm trying to remember off the top of my head, there's a Chick fil A, a Cane's, a Kfcoey, and Popeyes or
something like that. Well, they have an update for us, there are now seven chicken specific restaurants at this intersection, My Goodness, Chick fil A, Popeyes, Raisin Canes, KFC, Dave's Hot Chicken, Buffalo, Wild Wings, and the newly added to the neighborhood Wing Stop, not to mention places like apple Bees, Wild Bills, and Rascals who also have plentiful chicken options
on their menus. Now, I think that's really interesting because they're probably like there's a high chicken the consumption rate here in Apple Valley. But I think that is kind of funny. And I do feel bad for KFC because you just picture some lonely employee in there having cane for lunch, yeah, and nobody's stopping there. Meanwhile, the line at Chick fil A is always around the block.
Right, which I think that's also kind of like a novelty. Sometimes people go to Chick fil A just because the line is long and they want to say that they did.
Really you think so, yeah, because.
I don't think that Chick fil a chicken is nearly as good as Raisin Cane's chicken. I know we already had this like huge debate, but like, I think it's because oh it's Chick fil A, and the line is always super long and I have to go wait forever in this line. It's like a weird novelty thing for the gram or something.
Okay, I mean maybe I don't really go to any of the fast food chicken places. Susan bought homes some She went to Cub or somewhere and brought home. If you go in like the deli section of cub you can buy like, you know, chicken nuggets that are barbecue flavor. They were the blandest, not good chicken nuggets summer, and I had them last night because I had a salmon salad for dinner. Very healthy, still hungry, got in the fridge for nuggets, so they were okay, Oh, I'm hungry
now for the next one. Wednesday last week, the episode was called The Clap. My maiden name is Clap with two p's Dave, thank you for sharing the history about the Clap and how it was very interesting and cringey and made me lol. Maybe think about a time that I ran into a woman at yoga studio. Her maiden name is also Clap. She mentioned them that in Boston there's the oldest cemetery in the US, and full of
tombstones with the last name clap on them. Would it be cool if our forefathers who settle in America came up with the slag word slang word clap for gone rhea. Any ounce of making the last name clap a little cooler except for the names Clapper, clappy, clap her hands, the clap would be awesome. That is the most random email I've ever sent. But thank you for being a platform for randomness. That is from Lauren.
Clap they clap again, Clap clap, make it clap, make it.
Clap, make them clap.
I say that to Jenny every morning. She does, make them clap, girly pop the italk.
Clap wall and I make a clap baby. Okay, then no, I read started it with the history of the clap.
Let see what we got here. I've been a long time listener of the Christmas Wish and every year it warms my heart. That said, I've always had one question, how can the receivers aren't giving a heads up to ensure kids or spouses aren't around before you rattle off the gifts. Hearing all the wonderful gifts being described on speaker is heartwarming. But I sometimes wonder if the parents might prefer to keep it as a surprise for Christmas
morning by wrapping the gifts themselves. It's still a beautiful gift either way. But I was just curious. Nah, you can't think of everything. I think that's what it is. It's like, we want to tell you and the people who are listening. We don't want to say, well, we got you a bunch of surprise.
Yes, so we like to tell.
People only got mittens, and you got a Lego set and a light bright and a jacket and that type of thing.
It might be wrong. I'm pretty sure we do give them the presence wrapped also, so the parents do have the option to.
Put it under their Are you serious?
I mean we used to. We don't have as big of a promotions department anymore.
I don't think we do.
I'm not positive, but we used to always wrap the presents.
On another note, I wanted to love the shout out to the woman who donated fifteen hundred dollars yesterday in memory of her mom. Then somebody texted in with criticism about about not recognizing smaller donations. All I could think was, you're damned if you're due, and you're damned if you don't.
Yeah.
Hearing her story was so touching and might have inspired others to honor loved ones in a similar way. I thought it was a great moment, and I'm glad you shared it. Now. I love you, Amber, but I'm going to call you out. You said, somebody texted in criticizing not recognizing smaller donations. You're damned if you do, You're damned if you don't. I'm going to go back to your previous paragraph where we don't let the parents know in advance that we're going to tell them in advance
what the gifts are. You could also apply damned if you do, damned if you don't. So, in other words, we were you know, we did our best to help them with Christmas wish, but Amber found something flawed in it. Now, I'm not ripping on you, Amber, because I think it's kind of funny that you in the next paragraph you gave an example of damned if you do a damn but if you don't, and in your previous paragraph you gave another perfect example. So Amber, I'm giving you a shit.
I know you can take it. She says, keep doing what you're doing. You're making the season brighter for so many people from your one and only fan from Harrison, Montana. But not anymore. I live in Defiance, Ohio, where, by the way, the cost of living is much easier than Big Sky Country, Define, Ohio. I don't know anything about it, but Harrison, Montana is probably one of those towns where people like Tom Cruise.
And Kelly Clarkson live and ranches.
Giant ranches that used to be like, you know, twenty dollars an acre and now is like fifty thousand dollars.
Per an acre or something like that.
So Montana is one of those places where everybody wants to go. Yeah, And I've had relatives live in Montana my entire life. My dad's family settled in Montana in the early nineteen hundreds. My dad was born in Miles City, Montana in nineteen fifteen. And Montana up until ten fifteen, twenty years ago was like a desolate place of cheap houses.
Wow.
And now it's like it's like bail or aspen now.
Because a yellowstone putting it on them.
A yellowstone exactly hit the lead on that one and that one, and here we go. Minnesota Goodbye, don't say my Name. Since the year, end of the year is upon it is, I get a few early a few early year in review questions for you. What was the song of the year for you? I'll go first. I will say Taste No Chaboozy Chaboozy, then Taste by Sabrina Carpenter. Love that song, Jenny.
God.
I feel like I'm going to steal this from Bailey, but I feel like it's got to be Chapel Roone Hot to go for me.
I was gonna pick Chapel Rone too, but I'll probably pick Pink Pony Club or Red Wine super Nova. I love her and anything Honestly, her whole CD moves my song of the year.
What's your favorite bit from the show this year? I'm a bad I'm a bad person to ask, because this is the way my mind works. It's there and now it's in the past. Yeah, it's there and now it's in the past. My mind does not retain necessarily the bits that we do from day to day, week to week, months and months year to year, and I'll forget all about them as soon as they are in the past.
My mind is working on the next thing. But if people remind me, they go remember that time when, and then I'll go, oh, yeah, but my mind has never retained the bits that we do.
Yeah, I would say, just because we brought it back this year, I'll just say I'm hype that mixtape games back, So I would say that that's kind of like a forever running.
Favorite bit that we do.
Yeah, but in general, I don't know. Bill, You're newer, so you don't have as many bits that you got to remember, do you have? I mean there's one particular one.
I was trying to think of them and.
The impression you did of all of us that funny. Yeah.
I did like doing the impressions of all of you. I liked when you had the bagpipe guy come in for my birth. Yeah, it's a good bit.
Yeah, I don't know. I think all the bits are good so period.
You do know, you don't some of our suck. We did some really bad new one.
I like the new one we started yesterday. We're Singana de size if somethings of naughty or nice, and they get spankings if they're been naughty.
That's fun.
You know what I liked about that one, you guys, is that it made us laugh, and you know, a lot of the bits we do we think are pretty funny, but that one was, like I was cracking up during it was just so stupid. Next one, give me your best movie so far from twenty twenty four. Oh, I don't know, Bailey Wicked.
It's wicked. Oh period, It's so good. I want to go see it again.
It's wicked. And I can't talk about this now because I'm allowed to. But I did see that new Bob Dylan movie called A Complete Unknown with Timothy's Shallomey, and I would very much recommend going seeing that, even if you don't know much about Bob Dylan, because I didn't, but Timothy Challomay does such a good job and it was such an interesting movie.
Nice.
Uh, I don't know. I mean, I saw a few that I really like, but I truly I'm sorry. I don't remember what that. I'd have to ask Carson because Carson's the movie guy in our family, and Carson's like, Dad, let's go see a movie. But I can't remember, so I'm kind of worthless on this one. Next one, what was your favorite thing that you've done this year? Oh?
I can go first, climbing Pike's Peak was no question, my favorite thing that I've done in a very long time because I've always wanted to do it and I did it.
Kayley, I got hired here period.
Oh that's a good one, yeah, Jenny.
Mine would be the big camper van trip we took to Utah.
Perfect.
That seems so otherworldly.
I think about it all the time, honestly, which is strange that I think about.
Your vacation to Utah. It's very star Wars.
I think that is may be gonna do it and that is Yeah. We're out of time for the Minnesota Goodbye, but we'll be back with another one tomorrow. If you want to send any your email to Ryan Show at kadiwb dot com. We love the random factor whenever you come up with something totally random or a rant. If you want to do a rant and you want to record it and send a voice memo, I'm going to tell you you're in tough competition with Juanita because she
could do stand up. She really is, and I think the funny thing is about her that's really her, that is really that is her personality. So whatever you want to send in, we would love to hear from you. And if we read it on the radio, we'll send you a staff Rider sticker to slap on the side of your Stanley cool What is Stanley Stubley mug?
Tumblr?
Yeah, cooler?
I don't know. Oh I laughed and snot came out of my nose.
You're sick, You're.
Disgusting, all right, Thanks for listening, Minnesota. Goodbye Ryan Show at katiwb dot com