Here we go with the Minnesota goodbye and let's get right into the emails. Happy new Year, says Anna. Missed you all so much during your break, Never leave us again. Question for you all if your phone was purely utilitarian, where you could only talk in the phone, text and look up directions, what would you do with all your free time? If social media disappeared? How would you fill your days? Would you go out more, start a new hobby, volunteered in an old folks home, start a side hustle.
My goal for twenty twenty five is to spend less than one and a half hours a day on my phone, which means I buy and large given up social media. And I tell you it is so freeing. I hope this is a good thought starter. Mah, says Anna. That's a really good point. And it's funny how she calls it purely utilitarian, where it's phone, text and look up directions. Ye, which it's more than just a phone then, but I get what you're saying, there's no social media. Great question.
Good for you for giving up all the social media. What I sat on the phone yesterday and scroll and one more, one more Facebook, one more Instagram, one more one more. I don't know. I would probably I work out about as much as my body will tolerate right now, So I couldn't say that I don't want to watch more TV. I would say, maybe read the stacks of books that I have and maybe play more ukulele. What about you?
Yeah, I would probably.
I would probably work out more because I think a lot of me working out is like I'm going to go home and just like look at my phone for a little bit, decompress, and then I'll have the energy to work out later and then I don't. So I think workout would probably be one for me. Also, I would actually probably watch TV, because I don't. I rarely watch TV, okay, and I used to before having a smartphone. I definitely like loved all my shows and stuff, and
then probably just be a little bit more social. I think like there's this loneliness epidemic that they're talking about of the younger generations because they all just communicate via phone and they don't actually go out and see people, and they're like lacking social skills all this other stuff. And I do think about my life a handful of years ago, and I was way more social before the TikTok and Instagram became so big because.
I think that is our social life. They used to they said, it used to be the church because back when everybody went to church, that was your social circle. Then it was the mall where you would meet all your friends at the mall. H Then you know, school for.
Young people for sure, friends, movies.
And now we don't have a gathering place anymore. So it is social media. I think there is a loneliness epandemic, and I worry, like Carson seems lonely to me, even though he lives in a house with three other guys and they go to you know, Viking's game, you know, nights at the local bar, they'll go to a Clippers game or whatever. He just seems kind of lonely. And I think a lot of it is because that's the gen Z social media thing. Right, So right, more emails.
This one says hello, don't say my name. However, I'm not even gonna sign my name just in case. Okay, I'm currently listening to the Minnesota Goodbye podcast about swingers because we talked about this yesterday, like how do you do it? What's the protocol? When you walk in? Do you like you know, like, do you go have like the seven layer dip and then go to the bedroom and start banging, or do you have a couple of cocktails or do you like, say, hey, you look good,
do you want to go? What is your protocol? Yeah, so, my husband and I are swingers. Were a straight couple early forties. We've been involved for a few years. I'm laughing so hard about Jenny saying what if you get stuck with the one thug in the group. When we first started, I was very concerned about that. That happens for sure, not to me. I will not swap unless I'm interested, But I have friends who have taken one for the team. They described it as lol. But Dave,
you are right. You always have a choice and you do not have to get stuck with it. And anybody everybody we've encountered has been super respectful and gets the hint of you are not interested in them sexually. Dave, you are one hundred percent correct when you said that you have heard the swinger lifestyle has a ton to do with friendships and social aspects for my husband and I, at least, I should say. However, there are definitely people into the lifestyle that just want to get the fucking.
She writes in all bold, all caps, just want to get to fucking. My husband and I have been to multiple house parties, hotel takeover parties, out of town lifestyle establishments, and I will say they are so fun. We look forward to each event. The things that we have seen are nuts, piles of people on top of each other, a lot of gloryhole walls. You guys know what a glory hole is.
Yeah, where you familiar peak through when you see a penis, right, No, oh.
No, you don't peek through. They put their penis through the wall.
Oh okay, so it pokes you.
In the well. If you're in your peaking, you got to be careful. No, you're not looking through the hole in the wall.
So I don't have my eye and away from them.
Never, at any time is your eye.
And maybe that's why nobody's been coming up to my holes.
E good god, Jenny, it's your face being so proud of yourself, Like, here's a good one. Anyway. She goes on to say, basically, any sexual position you can imagine, threesomes, foursomes, ten sms, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. The best part of this whole thing is the friendships we have made have been irreplaceable. I have also heard where's the lube being yelled out
a couple of times at past parties. Love you guys so much, have a wonderful day, Signed your anonymous local swinger ps dart Lick dart Lick, but only to my husband, So.
She doesn't do that at the swinger parties.
Strange, but no, seriously, I don't know.
She just said those piles of people on each other, somebody's looking some asses.
As at a swinger party. I don't. I mean, I don't know. To me, that seems so freaking weird to walk in and there's like a pile of people, like a tensome and a pile of people on top of each other.
I just imagine it being in a circle.
Okay, describe that. Describe that? What do you mean?
Well, I think that you're probably engaging with multiple people at the same time, and you're kind of in a circular formation so that you.
Have easy ass.
It's a daisy chain.
Oh, I didn't know there was an actual term.
Yeah, you know that. So if a woman is you know, like oral on a guy while he's oral on another guy, and that guy is oral on another girl, and that girl is oral on a that's a daisy chain.
Yeah, you didn't know that, never heard that term used.
Did you think you would learn anything like that on the podcast today?
I never know what I'm going to learn on this podcast. Honestly.
That's what I love about it the most is one day we're talking about people at the airport being assholes and that say we're talking about daisy chain.
Daisy chain, yes exactly.
He was going to email this person back and be like, so, when's the next one. I want to check it out? Well, that's the next mask parties a personal email.
I'm going to tell you. I'm going to go ahead and tell you this that at my age there probably are swingers parties, but I think you're your variety of So I will tell you this, Do shit while you're young. Take it from me. Do shit while you're young, because when you get older, your body might betray you. You might lose your legs to diabetes. And I'm not trying to be funny, but you never know. So do shit while you're young. If you want to be a swinger, if you want to like hook up with a big
orgy fest down in Shockapy. That's where they have the annual orgy fest is down in Shockapy.
I've heard that about chocopy.
But do it while you're young. Do all of these things while you're young. All right, next email, Hold on one second. Okay, here's what Nita. I have not listened to what Nita's rant, but if you guys are ready, we can give it a shot.
Here.
I got to push a couple of buttons, and then I got to push a couple of more buttons. And I'm gonna make sure I get this set up right so it doesn't accidentally go on the radio. And I think we are ready for one Nita's rant.
Here we go, Happy New Year, my favorite radio family. It's me and I'm here with my first twenty twenty five rant for the year. So this runs about people who don't put gas in their car. So I was in Phoenix, Arizona, over the holidays, and I have this one aunt Whoevery time she goes towhere, she wants somebody to ride with her. So I got up and I said, y'all, I take a ride with you. So she says that she's gonna stop at the store and pick up a
couple of items and then she'll be right out. So I get in the car, and I kept hearing the ding so I'm thinking it's the seat belt, so I unclicked my seat belts and clicked it back again. It's not the seat belt because it kept dinging. So I looked over and her dash. There's no fucking gas in the car. So I asked him, like, how.
Far are we going?
And she says, oh, we're not going that far. I said, but we just passed by three gas stations. Don't you fucking hear that dinging?
Oh?
Girls, it's plenty of gas in this car.
No, it's not.
So I think we went probably another three or four miles before we finally got to the store. And then she goes, Okay, I'm just gonna run in and go grab a couple of eyes, and I'll be right out. She'd let she gets out, she leaves a fucking car running. There's no goddamn gas in the car. What the fuck is wrong with you? That is so irritating. If you see you have no gas, put some fucking gas in the car, and then don't leave somebody sitting in the car with a car running. God damn it. That pisses
me off. Well, glad to be back. I hope you guys have a wonderful day. Be back next week with another rant. Love you guys.
Bye. I think you had a like you need to get on high blood pressure meds because that should not set you off the way it did. I will say, I don't like when people like Carson would borrow my car to do door dash and I would go out coming to work and you know the little meter that says you've got eight miles until you fill up. Yeah, it would be like eight miles until I fill up. And I'd be like, oh damn, because.
That's the first thing you have to do. And if you have to go somewhere and now you have to go get gas first, freaking And.
You claims that one and says you have eight miles laft, you actually probably have like eighteen. Like your your meters just like lying to you a little bit because of the dumb people who wait till it's at zero mile.
I would agree with that.
Yeah, I hope. So I've driven mine to like zero twice.
Maybe I've only done it one time where I got it down to one mile and it terrified me.
But yeah, but don't you feel good when you coast into the gas station and it says one mile ord zero and you made it. You're like, oh, praise the Lord, all right? Thinking I need to love your rants. We love you next time. I don't think we've said this one, but let's check here. Okay, here we go. The topic for the show, what weird or funny thing did you learn about your family over the holiday. I know a lot of us stayed with family, so this might have come up. I went to stay with my mother and
with my in laws in another state. Now. My mother in law is a seventy year olds. Settling into the guest room, I went to plug my phone charger into the power strip coming out from under the bed. Instead of a lamp plugged into it, I found a giant wand vibrator under the bed. My husband said, that's not a vibrator, that's a back massager, and proceeded to demonstrate. You should have seen his face when I told him it was in fact not, in fact a back massager.
He had just demonstrated on his back. I then said, I think your mom and dad sleep in different rooms when we aren't here, which I've suspected for a while, and this is further proof. It was not a judgmental tone, because who cares. Just an observation that her vibrator and maybe importantly, her hair dryer are both in the guest room, to which he said, Dave and Susan sleep in different rooms, which I love that my name even came up. I'm glad I've turned him into such a loyal fan of
the show. Needless to say, I'm happy my mother in law is getting some because my father in law is not it well neither is she, but regardless, good for then when you're seventy, you do what you want. Welcome back from break Boy? Did I miss you? Thank you? Not going to say your name. I think it is surprising to a lot of people to think that you pretty much masturbate at any age. I think that people go, well, yeah, when I turned forty five, I won't need to masturbate anymore.
And I'm not going to say anything more than that, but I will say that I think that people think that, oh, well, once you get into a relationship and you have a partner, you don't masturbate anymore. But yeah, right, yeah, Jenny, Okay, next one. No, I think we're going to skip that one. All right, let's try this one. I haven't read it, but let's try it anyway. I'm a day behind the podcast due to tending small children and generally not knowing
what day it is for the holidays. But when I heard you ask for the worst plane ride experience, I knew I had the email. When I was about thirteen, my parents lived in two different states. My dad worked for the airlines, and for the first time, my brother and I would be flying to him by ourselves, with the flight attendant escort. These flight attendees chaperones only walk you off and on the plane, and my brother and I buckled in for a relatively click quick flight. We're
in the air. We're told to expect turbulence but never fun, but I can handle it. As the flight progressed, the pilot came on the speaker and said that due to not enough fuel, we weren't expected to continue to our destination and prepare for an emergency landing. What now, that's weird. I don't know why they would not have enough fuel, but okay, emergency landing. You might as well have told the scared kid, we were crash landing. This combined with
the turbulence, made me want to vomit. A flight attendant came over and reminded us then in case the oxygen mass were released, to put mine on before I put my brothers on, pretty much verifying in my head that we're going to die. I was panicking on the inside, telling my little brother everything was fine and nothing bad was going to happen to us. I never had to be the adult before.
Now.
Just remember they are thirteen years old. The flight went on. You know what happened? Nothing? We made it to our destination with no further issues, no explanation, not one that I remember anyway. When we got off the plane, my dad was already there and looked a little panic maybe in a little pissed. He had been made aware there were complications, but once I told him my version of
the events, he was livid. Rightfully, so, I don't think a pilot should prepare you for an emergency landing without being one thousand percent sure that is what is happening. After that, I remember a few phone calls with my dad's colorful language on full display, but we didn't talk about it much. When all was said and done, ten out of ten don't recommend. What a crappy experience. By far my worst plane ride ever. Also, you want to know what it's like to hear the show is reading
your email? Well it makes your stomach drop and your butthole pucker, but in a good way. Thanks for reading. Much love to you all. And their name is Dominique, which is a beautiful name. Wow that you know what? I don't know even as a pilot, because I pay attention to things like that. If they said prepare for an emergency landing, that can mean on a highway, in a field, on water. So emergency landing can also mean
we got to get down right now. For example, if there's a fire on the airplane, they got to get down right now. So maybe by emergency landing they thought, well, we might run out of fuel. Prepare I don't know, because you can do an emergency landing that's not dangerous. Like if you're flying from I don't know, from here to Saint Louis and you have a fuel leak or whatever and you get a land in Des Moines. Yeah, that's an emergency landing, but it's not dangerous.
Now do they call it an emergency then, or just like okay, yeah, yeah, the emergency.
Would throw me.
You have to declare an emergency because what happens is if you declare an emergency, now you get priority over all the other airplanes. Yeah, it's kind of like cut in front of line. So yeah, and that is it for the Minnesota Goodbye. I love to hear what's on your mind. Send an email to the same address, Ryan Show at KDWB dot com.