Be Patient Jacka** - podcast episode cover

Be Patient Jacka**

Dec 06, 202318 min
--:--
--:--
Download Metacast podcast app
Listen to this episode in Metacast mobile app
Don't just listen to podcasts. Learn from them with transcripts, summaries, and chapters for every episode. Skim, search, and bookmark insights. Learn more

Episode description

A bad restaurant/tipping experience, Dave tried to do something discreetly but it didn't go so well, someone found out there ex was a swinger, another classic Dave Ryan joke, and more!

Transcript

Welcome to another quality broadcast of The Minnesota good Bye made up primarily of your emails, and that's what we're doing to start off the show is read e emails. This honestly, I love the Minnesota Goodbye because you do all the show prep. You do everything. I mean, not you, Jenny, I mean you listening. So it's always entertaining to us because we don't know what's going to happen. And plus we can get a little bit dicey and talk about, you know, naughty things if we want to, and be

a little bit more opinionated, you know that type of thing. So let's start off with from one from koua Jong. Good morning, my dart liquor. Thank you, Kua. I heard the morning show when you guys were talking about the tipping culture. I had one I want to share with you. A couple of weeks ago, me and my wife went to eat it a Chinese buffet and Fridley. Whole time we were there, our server never

came and checked on us to see if we needed anything or refills. We had to ask a different server to add to that, me and my wife both went to the restroom at the same time. I came back first, and our server were standing at our table saying, these customers left without paying. She didn't realize I was right behind her and could understand what she had said. When the bill came, they added a gratuity charge, which they never did before. So we paid and got up. Our server came by

to take the plate. As we were leaving, she reached her hand out and said, literally, you guys are not leaving any tip for me. We just walked out and never wanted to go back there to eat. Sorry if it was a longer email, I got my Minnesota Goodbye sticker. By the way, thank you, signed Dart Liquor. So, in other words, they went to a Chinese buffet and from what I get, they spoke Chinese, but Kua also speaks Chinese apparently, and then understand so they put

a gratuity charge on it. And then she said, you guys are not leaving a tip for me. Wow, okay, just yeah. I worked for the server one time who she went up to a table. After the table I think could stiff her and there was not a gratuity charge on it, and she can fronted them, and I was like, you don't, you don't get to do that, like they like you just don't. It's

just like the matter of the business, Like you get stiffed sometimes. I used to get stiffed all the time at Bubba Gums at them all of America, and it's just part of the job. And so like, I'm sorry, I think it is pretty rude to go up to a customer and ask I feel like I've heard of that before. Let me ask you a question.

So this happened once at Buffalo Wild Wings. It was before Star Party, and the entire air staff of all the DJs went to Buffalo Wild Wings, right down the block from myth for Star Party, and so we ate and I tipped one hundred dollars and the server, who was probably twenty five years old, doesn't matter, but for context, she came back to the

table and she said, oh my gosh, thank you so much. And I felt a little bit embarrassed because I didn't want to be thanked for it, yeah, in front of everybody else, because I tipped a lot, because you know, no, I just did. And it was a big table of obnoxious DJs, and I was a little bit embarrassed, but also she was grateful. Would you if somebody over tipped you. Let's say, on a fifty dollars sixty dollars bill, they tipped one hundred dollars, would

you come back and say thank you so much? Or would you just not?

Ugh? I it would just depend on the situation, because I have been got I have gotten a big tip like that before, but usually the people were gone by the time I saw the tip, So if they had still been there, I probably wouldn't have like, cause I know how people are with money, like they don't want a lot of people don't want to flaunt their money, you know, right, So I wouldn't make it like such a big deal that everyone around was like geez, what did he do?

But I would probably go back and be like, thank you so much for that tip. Like I probably would say that in a very not like discrete way. And if you just walked up to them and said, hey, thank you very much, I appreciate that, and gave them like a little special like look you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, okay, interesting next one. It has nothing to do with tipping. It's got to do with pean in the shower. And here we go, Dave and

Jenny. I grew up relatively white trash. But I'm amazed constantly how not filthy I am. I already rarely pee in the shower, be honest, never did it till recently when I learned how common it is. Now you're introducing blowing your nose in the shower to people not recognize their bodily functions prior to showering. I'm shocked. I recognize other scenarios where I'm not gross like others, but they're gross, so I won't even bring them up. Just

shocked. Use a tissue and use the toilet people. While she did say that the hot water brought on the sniffles, Yeah, so, I mean, I don't blow my nose all the time, but if I'm in a very stuffy nose situation and I'm in the shower and I feel like I need to blow it in that moment, then yeah, I'm going to do it. But I'm not like going into the shower to blow my nose. I'm not going into the shower to pee. It just happens to happen. But

also, I think my body's pretty used to feeling. It's like the what pavlog, but the thing where like you get in the shower. Now you feel the water, you're in there, and now you're like, yep, I have to pee. Okay you know what, Yeah, no, that totally makes sense. I will say, you know what, it's your own body, it's your own snot it's your own pe, it's your own whatever. I mean, It doesn't gross me out, you know what I mean.

So, but I still don't really I've blown my nose in the shower into my hands, but not something that I normally would be like, yeah, I'm fine with it, all right. Hating to lead on that one. By the way, I'm a little bit behind on mailing out stickers, so if you're waiting for one, then yeah, it's coming, trust me. Okay. Follow up on the swinger story. I did find out my ex is now a swinger, and me, like Dave, did not know how to react. This is, by the way, from a female.

We used to chat every now and then, and I can't remember how it came up, but he told me he goes to swingers parties almost every single weekend. He hooks up with men and women, and it was truly so shocking to me to hear that. He then proceeded to send me information about

swingers in my area so my husband and I could explore. He asked me to remain open minded and tried to convince me that sex shouldn't be with just one person because people biologically aren't meant to be tied to one person sexually, even when married. I then reminded him that we got married because we do, in fact think sex should be between one person and one person only. We haven't spoken since, just had to share have a great day. I'm

so curious. I could never explore the swinger's culture because even if I was curious and I wanted to go and just to watch, Somebody'd be like, hey, you're Dave Ryan, aren't you, And I'd be like, no, yeah, it's Dave Ryan. Let's get a selfie with Dave Ryan. Dave Ryan, are you a swinger? So I can't ever explore it. I mean, I guess if I visited Great Falls, Montana and looked up swingers great Falls, I might be able to Yeah, but here's my luck.

Somebody'd be like, hey you Dave Ryan. Yeah, I listened on iHeart right exactly. So God, thank you Samantha for that one. Let's do another one. This one says listening to the podcast today, and I truly cannot believe how many people are sick right now. I went to the doctor to the second time to day in a month because of lingering COVID systems. I had COVID at the beginning of October, and I haven't felt the same since. My doctor told maybe then seeing cops and cold symptoms lasting up

to three months, and it just shocked me. As I'm a very healthy person in general. I thought I would extend that information for Jenny and pray that you have a better outcome than me. How are you feeling that? I'm feeling a hundred times better. I mean, I was blowing my nose constantly yesterday and I had like a little bit less of a voice. I

sounded really easily. But no, I'm doing so much better today. I purposely made sure I did not take a single nap yesterday and like made myself do things all day so that I could try to get some really good rest last night, and I still didn't go to bed as early as I should, but I got decent sleep, So I'm feeling better. But I did call my I called my mom and she is really sick herself right now too, So yes, I feel yeah that there's a lot of sickness going around.

There is very just got the sniffles and things like that. So uh, next one, Minnesota, goodbye, let me find it. One literally just came in. You heard the ding ding a minute ago. Last night after the kids went to bed, I told my husband the Henry the Wasp joke. Yes, if you didn't hear it yesterday. It is a long discuss not disgusting, but stupid joke, and it's it's frustrating because at the

end there's it's stupid. As a wife, I would say my number one goal pertaining to my husband is to love him, but my number two goal is to annoy the shit out of him, and mission accomplished. Midway through, he stopped me and asked me why, or asked me if my five year old told me this joke. I said, no, zip it and listen. So halfway through she's like, zip it and listen. I could

barely get to the punchline part because I was laughing so hard. I know how not amused he would be. I got a slight smirk, and then he told me I was ridiculous, while smiling. I plan to tell it to his entire family at Christmas because that's my personality. Thank you, Dave. That is from Hannah. Hannah, God love you. I think I'm glad that you enjoyed the Henry the Wasp joke. I fucking hate the Henry

the Wasp joke. One of the things that I didn't like at boy Scout camp was when some kid would want to tell the Henry the Wasp joke because a lot of kids they don't edit themselves and they don't know how to go on long enough but not too long. And I told you, I think one kid, Sam, love you, Sam, great kid, he's an Eagle Scout, told a fifteen minute version of it. So if you didn't hear the Henry the Wasp joke, it's on yesterday's podcast. There's one other

can I tell you. Somebody told me on the school bus in probably fifth or sixth grade. I'm going to tell you, and I want you to react the way you should. Okay. So a guy's walking his donk into town and they're walking and walking, and then the donkey says how much longer? And the guy says, be patient, jack ass, be patient. So they walk for another few minutes, and the donkey says how much longer.

The owner says, be patient, jack ass, Be patient. So they walk another few minutes and the donkey says how much longer, and the owner says, be patient, jack ass, Be patient? And they walk another three minutes or so, and the donkey says how much longer, and the owner says, be patient, jack ass, Be patient? Are we done? Are we done yet? What are we done? Be patient? Jack ass, be patient? Did you see that kind? I did this sort of, but I was like, okay, after the third time,

I'm like, he's gonna just keep saying. He's just gonna keep saying it, so I think I need to interrupt. But I didn't. I didn't see the punchline there. When it was a woman named Kathy Smith. She was a girl at the time, fifth or sixth grade, and she told me that. I remember looking over the seat of the bus to her sitting behind me, and she told me this joke and I said, just get to the punchline, and she burned me and said, be patient, jackass, be patient. I'm like, fuck you, Kathy Smith. And I've

never told that joke since then, not even once. But it's the same kind of joke where they're like, Okay, get to it all right, Hannah, thank you very much. Another email just came in A moment ago. I was listening to yesterday's Minnesota Goodbye and an update for all the Chumba haters out there. I noticed my commercial that played at the start of the episode was Chumbu Casino, but it was Ryan Seacrest doing the ad. I will say it was much more pleasant than the slot machine dings and didn't send

my body into full shock. But I still laugh because it's still a Chumba casino ad all right. Also, we might be past the crazy things you saw while driving because a story if you come back around to it. Sure. I was actually a passenger in my ex husband's car. Were driving down ninety four E in Saint Paul. A car cut him off and breake checked him to the point where we were almost at a dead stop on the highway. I didn't think he was driving like an asshole. My ex went around

the break checker and exited. When we came to a stoplight at the exit, a guy got out of his car and hit my ex husband's back window on the passenger side. So behind me and it shattered. I was like, what the actual fuck just happened? My ex proceeded to drive home as if nothing happened. I was freaking out with my little dog in my arms, and I still to this day, do not know what it was about.

My friend said that maybe he owed someone money, which plays out because he still owes me ten thousand dollars and we got divorced twelve years ago. If he didn't have a reaction, I'm going to guess he knew who was hitting his car. Yeah, love you guys. Thanks for being a bright part of my day. Lauren, if you got more stickers, I'll take one, please, and thank you of course, Lauren. Let me take

a photo of your email, of your mail, of your address. Next one that is also somebody wanting a sticker, and let's see if we've got what's the time, Jenny? Are we doing okay? For time? Four minutes off? All right? Next one? This one says really quick. I don't think it's actually Minnesota goodbye material, but I wrote in on October twenty fourth. You read my email, I never got a sticker. I think Dave was in Colorado, so maybe he just forgot it. But if

I could get one. That'd be awesome. I'll take care of it. And then one more quick thing. With Drake liking barbecue, he has to eat it, mister pig stuff and Shockapie. Right now, they've moved locations, so they're opening a new location right by Canterbury Downs, so one opens if he has to go there. I also need to rent him to teach my five year old about video games, because I, oh, I see you want to rent Drake to teach my five year old about video games because

I have no clue. Have a great day. That is from Christy. I'm going to go back to something that happened earlier on the show today. On the Actual Radio Show, Drake was talking about how his brother wants to move in with him because his brother is older, in his thirties, lives with his mom and dad in Green Bay and they're kind of tired of him living there. So Drake is thinking about having him move in. A friend of mine, who is a cop, said do not and here's why.

Okay, in Minnesota, once your brother moves in, if he refuses to move out, Drake will have to file paperwork with the courts to get him to leave. Once a person establishes residency in Minnesota, no one can kick them out if they don't want to move out. We run into it all the time as cops, where people want a roommate, they let him move in and then they won't move out, and as cops we cannot kick anybody out. So think about this. I mean, it could be as simple

as if you got a real dick or of a friend. I could be like, oh, Jenny and Andrew, you know what, I just need a place to say for a couple of days, Susan and I aren't getting along, can I? And of course you would let me stay in the basement, of course you would. I could be a total dick and say no, this is where I live now, and you would have to file papers with the court to get to move out. Can you imagine? No,

I can't. I don't know exactly what the laws are specifically in Minnesota, but we had a weird situation when I was in my early twenties where one roommate moved out and she had a random girl move in, and the other girl wouldn't sign a lease and then it was like a whole mess, and the landlord was involved, and the landlord was like, she's gonna have squatting right soon, and it was like it was luckily we got her to move out and we found someone else, but it was a whole mess,

and I was still living there. So I was very stressed for a couple months because I thought I was about to start covering someone else's rent and letting this random person live there for free. Be careful. There's a movie. It's a great movie. It's from nineteen ninety. It's called Pacific Heights with Michael Keaton. It is it's one. It's a gem that has disappeared from

anybody's radar. But if you ever get a chance and you're looking for a movie and you're boored, Pacific Heights is about this couple that live in this gorgeous house in San Francisco. Michael Keaton moves in and he won't move out, and then he starts to fuck with him and keep them awake all night, and then he wants them to basically abandon the house by moving out so

then it'll become his house. And it's scary and it's dark and it's creepy, and Michael Keaton is great, and it's called Pacific heights and it's from about nineteen ninety. Last email from Donna it is about Tahiti. Questions for Jenny who's just cut back from Tihiti. We're doing basically the same trip next week. Couple questions. Did you guys take your own snorkel gear or is there a place to rent or buy decent stuff? We did bring our own.

I would say, if you're saying at one of the fancy hotels, they will give you stuff to use, probably around the hotel, but they won't probably let you take it outside of the hotel. So I think it's worth bringing your own because we went into different beaches and just explored on our own. And we also didn't pay for any snorkeling excursion. So if you're already doing an excursion, then maybe skip it, but I did find it very beneficial. Next one, how is the custom line back into the US

from Tahiti? How long? It was probably thirty minutes, and we had to do customs in La so we had to get to a connecting flight too, so that was kind of a cluster, but it was about thirty minutes. Any favorite meals or restaurants on mainland Tahiti or Moria. I don't have anything for Tahiti. We didn't do our research there. Morea I would say snack Mohana was really good. And then Cook's Bay Hotels where we stayed, and their restaurant is kind of expensive, but we did do one meal there

and it was amazing. Favorite bug spray there. I've heard mosquitos are terrible right now. Honestly, we brought Bob bug spray. We didn't use it, but I did get bit so I would savring whatever you feel you like. Donn in Rochester said, thank you. You had great pictures. They're still on Jenny's website, website, Instagram. If you want to check out Jay Ryanshow dot com. I've got a blog up too. You can check that out. But have so much fun in Tahiti. You're gonna love it.

And that's it for the Minnesota goodbye. Send them emails in to Ryan's show at KADIWB dot com and thank you for listening

Transcript source: Provided by creator in RSS feed: download file
For the best experience, listen in Metacast app for iOS or Android