Gambling was something that I did.
This is Dan Patrick takes a gamble.
One of my bookies died at the kitchen Table, a podcast vehicle for Dan to talk about his love of gambling. One bet, another bet, another bet.
Without doing the actual gambling.
You're a coward. It's easy to have a scapegoat.
And now joined by bad Larry, Shayan Irving and Dylan the graphics guy.
I have friends.
Here's Dan Patrick.
Do you think Sean Payton did that? So nobody's gonna talk about Russell Wilson anymore. Sean Payton's smarter anyway in this room, that's for damn sure. Yeah. But if we figured it out, is he really smarter than us? What the media isn't? Danny? Oh? The media didn't pick it up. We did. We're smarter than the media, but dumber than sewn in the middle, Yeah, right in the middle. Okay. And then that that makes a nice transition to bad Larry, who talks just now. Hey, hey, bad lairr Oh, Dan
Hi doing buddy? Where are we today?
I left the beach at twelve oh five, like requested, I got the grandkids in town, and Camille came down last night, so I on the beach and seagurt.
Okay, Camille is my daughter in law.
There you go.
Now we're learning. Now, we're learning. Not everybody knows your family tree.
Right the mother the mothers come down to rescue the kids.
There.
You know, they've been with us for a little while, so they weren't from with us, then in Maine with us, and now they're down here for sure. Okay, but they're on the beach. I just walked out of rais.
Okay. Are aliens real.
Aliens?
Yeah, there's there's odds plus five hundred. I'm gonna say absolutely, I'm gonna take the money line with this. I mean, I'm going aliens.
One of them lives in New Jersey's on the phone right now.
Bad Larry's an alien. Huh.
None of them have ever none of them have ever been to Earth yet. But Derek definitely out there.
Yeah, I agree.
Well that one guy who testified, that one guy testified was like, man, they've been hiding stuff and I know where this is and locations are. Yeah, this is some independence stay shit. One hundred percent. We have aliens in locked drawers with cold freezers attached to them. One hundred percent. There's something like there's like a billion planets out there, right, yeah, like several billion different planets. Mathematically speaking, there's definitely intelligent
life out there. It one hundred percent exists. Even if they're not intelligent, they could still be out there right better than us always say there's intelligent life out there? What about if they're not intelligent? Speaking of which day, Dylan, whoa Dylan? Oh, Dylan at plus thirty eight points. I hate these plus eight five units, all right, Shay is at plus twenty units and bad Larry's still in the lost column. Everybody agree, Aliens out there? Yes, yeah, okay.
I mean more believable than in heaven, right Jack?
No, no, no, no, we're not doing that. We did it last week and I heard back from people saying, you know, why don't you believe in heaven? Atheists or no believers.
No.
I went to church every single day growing up. Didn't learn a lot. Yeah I did. I learned that I didn't need to go every single day. Okay, yeah, praise Jesus. I went to church twice a week. It's not a competition. No, no, it's just like you Jesus. More who is Jesus? The more it's obviously me. You need Jesus to love you more, dude,
you do, You need to be graded on a curve? Okay? Uh. The first country to find aliens Usa plus five hundred, China and then India, Russia plus fifteen hundred, Brazil plus eighteen hundred. If China, India, or Russia finds it will never know China and Russia for sure. No chance India too. Mody is a magician when it comes to media blackout. First person to leave Earth with Aliens.
This one's a layup. It's Tom Cruise back to where it all started.
Well, he doesn't have to leave Earth to be with aliens, so it's Elon Musk, then Tom Cruise, Bill Gates, Donald Trump, Jeff Bezos or the rock you think Bezos all day? I mean, with that much HGH and Starroyd's pumping through his veins like he's gonna we don't know that he's Oh yes, his head skull has grown three times since he cashed out of him.
It kind of looks like white berry bonds on AH all day.
Danny, Come on, would you be on HGH if you were him? Absolutely?
Okay, I would be the fattest slav of all time with one hundred billion dollars.
You don't even need that.
The fattest well, okay, all right.
First celebrity to be revealed as an alien Marks Zuckerberg, Donald Trump, Kanye West, Tom Cruise, Elon Musk or Harry Styles. Who is an alien? It's Tom Cruise or Harry Styles, all right, those are the only choices.
Zuckerberg is like just a robot, run of the mill robot.
Yeah, was a Harvard NERD. He didn't even graduate from Harvard Nerd. Let's recap, Shay had some baseball bets, bad, Larry. Let's see you had Vietnam plus six and a half versus our girls money. You had a little baseball with your Mets. You're betting on the Mets the rest of the season, Dylan recap. You did pretty well, Yeah, yeah.
F one, two for three, So you know you didn't.
Do well in golf. Yeah, Jordan Thomas has left the building. Jordan sp top ten and you had Adam Scott to win, and you took Vietnam straight up against Team USA. That leads us to bets for this week, Dylan, I'll start.
With you, alrighty Dan, the three I'm open just one Cameron Young to win. He had a good showing at the the Open. At the Open, I don't know if that looks great right now. I think you Fenton was even yesterday so like tied somewhere in the eighties.
Yees, because normally we take this on Thursday, but we weren't able to and so we're doing it today.
And as a man of honor, I'm sticking with that bet.
Why weren't we able to do this yesterday? She had a work situation come up yesterday. I had to handle a few things. The fires had to put out Danny, but not fire somebody. Yeah yeah, yeah, no, that was on the line. Yeah yeah, they were trying to fire one of my guys. Danny had to stand up for him and make a case like Perry Mason and well, I think we're pretty fucked. Yeah, okay, all right, I think he's fucked. Do you feel better that you at
least did that? No? I think it would be a lot better if I didn't do that and came here instead, and it like wrote an email that way better? Did you hurt this situation? I didn't help, didn't help neutral. We were getting pizza at the over on Broad and she got weird. She got weird. More people showed up. She kind of took the reins of the bar, and uh, I didn't help anybody, no, because you're not drinking, correct, So everybody got a free drink. I bought a lot
of drinks, all right. So Dylan, you got that anything else that you're betting on? Of course you're betting on the Belgian Grand Prix.
Yeah, but also UFC dan big card this weekend, So throwing a little parlay which we always works out.
Well, the Black Beast is fighting the Black.
Beast, and I'm taking him.
That's his nickname. And tell Larry that, okay song as he's not a black art she's dealing, okay, all right.
So I got the Black Beast. These are all money line Black Beast, Tony Ferguson, Alex Peiro and Justin Gatgee all to win plays out or pays out plus five and thirty three about fifty to.
One, okay. Belgian Grand Prix yeah.
Uh three units stand on there being a safety car. I guess it's supposed to rain, so that's minus three hundred.
What does his safety car do?
It's like if there's like a crash or you know, some obstruction or whatever. Then they basically off to slow down and like follow the safety safety car. That's kind of my understanding. All right, that's three units yep, two units on Max Versus stopping fastest lap and Lando Norris podium finished both minus one fifty?
Is he going to break the trophy again?
Probably?
Did you see that? No? Absolutely not, Max Verse stopping shopping one and then Lando grabs a big bottle of champagne and slams it down on the podium. The trophy that were stopping just one tumbles over and breaks.
It's like a ceramic It broke four. Yeah.
Yeah, well it's it's a beautiful looking vase. Not anymore. Well, no, it's video.
Yeah it looks like it looks like an.
You cracked the bottle on the boss. Yes, yeah, Bob not. Basically we're in Connecticut. Bomb what else do you have?
And one unit on George Russell to finish on the podium plus two seventy.
All right, Uh, shay, you got all baseball since you know well no, well, we'll talk about boxing. Ray pull it up Crawford versus Spence this weekend. Let's say it that we've waited for a while for them we sure ship have. Yeah, I like Bud. I gotta tell you, I like Bud. Give me the odds, right, Ray, real quickly? Here we go.
So Spence is plus one twenty all day. Give me Crawford is minus one fifty.
Give me Bud minus one fifty four units. Done.
Well, I'm gonna ride that with you too.
Bud is the best. Yeah. Then you got baseball games. Yeah, I got Baseball Americana. You already lost a couple of these, did I went to for one yesterday? So okay, all right, all right? I got the Orioles plus one oh five against the Yanks, Buckos plus one thirty five against the Phillies, Rays minus one fifteen against the cheating, dirty, despicable Astros. Wow, bad, Larry, Are you going golf? Since you usually don't know that much about golfer at least have a hard time pronouncing names.
I didn't even know there was a black beast. I don't fosl.
There we go, There we go.
Okay, I'm a football gambler. I bet a little baseballer. We saw de I mean, Shay's picks come in today and I was bored, so I bet all three of his games on my gambling account. I don't want him on the show. Oh, I'll just stick with what I sent it on Wednesday.
Don't bring it up, Larry. If you're not going to put it on the show, then nobody cares other than you telling us next week. You know, Hey, I got these bets right, not the ones on the show.
No, I'm just telling you. I bet Shase three baseball games today. I have three golfers hunging m Who I even had? I had, Sun Jay I had.
I don't know.
You guys got the papers there.
Tony now right?
Yeah?
And who's my other one?
Decide? Right? Yeah? I know you were gonna go Matt Suey all right, we'll include that god zero. Yeah? What else? I bet? Dan?
I got two soccer games. I don't even know how they turned out. I know I took you won the comedy bat took Argentino.
Argentina, Argentina versus South Africa. You had Argentina plus one twenty five England versus Denmark. England ended up winning one nil. I believe, But you got these, Ray.
I won one and lost one. You're saying, I don't know.
I'm I'm asking Ray. You won the England one. And what about Argentina against South Africa draw? Okay, loss, that's a lot.
I bet it three ways, so that's a loss. Okay, it's not a free I lose.
And once again, all you guys got to do is survive through the month of August. Then we get to football season.
That's it, you know, because the way.
Things have been panning out, Dylan's going to hit the tom cruise getting taken up in the spaceship or something for like fifty.
No. No, once we get to football season, everything is white clean, right he had the octopus. Yea, everything is white clean.
Yes.
Why there's football season and then there's everything else. But everything else counts, Danny, it does, but it makes it cleaner. As we start the football season. Everybody starts at the same spot.
I mean, I'd love to go in up forty US to lose.
Yeah. That sounds like communism to me, Danny. We all start the same spot. Wow, yeah, yeah, Marv.
In America and not everybody starts at the same space.
Then amen, right Larry, Yeah, uh, anything that needs to be mentioned, shay. Home life good, yeah, way better in the spent Yeah, we're doing good. Yeah, come on, all right, you know, all right, the roommate and I are going to uh what are we doing tomorrow? Oh, besides couples counseling, We're going to uh poker night in west Sport with a bunch of the bankers. So it's been to get way. And again I'm not drinking, So daddy's gonna win. Okay, poker, nut,
who's your dad? You wouldn't get through security. Larry bad, Larry bad. Larry can play poker, I'm sure he can, but he would never make it in the house. Like they would never allow him in the house. If he showed up, they wouldn't go, oh, come on in. No, he'd get cuffed and put in the back of a cop car. Why if you get through because I know people Danny like I'm not you know, we're okay, but escorted in you would never get into the Westport poker right.
There's like a bunch of private equity sons of bitches. These are investing. Those those are the guys that Larry takes advantage of love rebuy over and over. That's why you don't want Larry there. Yeah, Larry's got nothing to do with me when it comes to this. This is my game, motherfuckers. Yeah, these are your fish that's right. Yeah, that's right. Absolutely are my donkeys. Yeah, because Larry plays poker against the same guys each week, of course, and
they're not any good. They're their doctors, Larry, and.
No, they're really good. They would clean up his game.
Here we go here. You told me that the guys you play poker against aren't any good and that you win every every single time.
That that game died big al died like once. You don't even playing that game anymore, Larry?
Is your game? Mob the fuck up? Or what do you have? Security? Got some air charging? Big wait? Wait, we're not doing that.
We're not doing that legal.
Say that's illegal. I don't do any any either, just friendly.
House could yes, Ray, Yeah, there's no security when the big blindness twenty five cents.
Look at Ray's bottle caps from the top. Ray, I know that was cute, right, Testy today is I know? I am?
You?
Are you doing the podcast? We're taking us a bat gole until the football season day? Okay, you didn't tell me. I'm sorry, I forgot I apologies. I just want to mention it's Cowboys camp and this is the worst time of the year for me, because all of these media maniacs report on every single snap, every single pick, every single run, and it's just it's fodder for the cannon. You know. It's just Dallas Cowboys media extravaganza, and I fucking hate it every year. But because the fan base
is so big, that's why they talk about it. They talk about it because Jerry created a monster and he doesn't know how to control it, and it's out of control. It's fucking noth no. But all of these shows go, how do we get people to watch? If they drive by and they're flipping through and they go, oh, is Dak gonna have more interceptions than last year, then you're gonna get cowboy fans go, oh, let's hear what they have to say. Who's on the hot seat, Dak or
Mike McCarthy? Are they interested in Dalvin Cook? These are all these topic bars that they know people will stop and listen to it. It's all by design. I'm just over it. I just want a regular freaking training that's not happening. I know it can't happen. I'm not a Seahawks fan. I get it. Nobody gives a shit about them. Yeah, in Seattle, they do, oh please, in a real town. Might as well be Canada, British Columbia. Have you been to Seattle?
No?
God, no, I never go. Why wouldn't you go to Seattle because I don't have access to get into Canada? Danny, it's such a wonderful place.
So what.
Place restaurant scenery? I disagree completely.
I feel like it's like shitties. You grew up in Franciscott's country.
No, it's yeah, yeah, we're all going to have it really, really nice right now, Texas. Okay, that'll do it for this week. We've done it again. Hopefully we've managed to entertain you. If not, hopefully we didn't offend you. Maybe we did. Both Kansas are for a bad Larry Shaye and Irving Dylan, picture de Ray and Marvin with the controls. I'm Dan Patrick and we'll talk to you next week. On Dan Patrick takes a gamble