Episode 75: "Black" Jack

This is Dan Patrick takes a gamp. Gambling was something that I did a clever way to circumvent Dan actually making bets himself by using a proxy, and I became consumed by it and now joined by Bad Larry and Dylan the graphics guy. Here's Dan Patrick. Hey, bad Larry.

Hello Dan.

How are you doing, buddy?

I'm doing great. You're in Jersey. I've got Dylan right here in front of me, Larry, and hello Dylan. Shay is at the Travelers Championship in Hartford.

Is it Harford.

Cromwell? Yeah, right, Outsidewell what it used to be there the Greater Hartford opened. So you're in the greater part of Hartford.

I guess are there any great parts of Hartford?

Yes, of course there are West Hartford.

There are West Hartford. Old Weathersfield was a city.

It's disgusting.

Are you still sober, Shay?

Nope?

Nope, broke that stale daddy today? Yeah? Yeah, okay.

Happen about nine thirty this morning?

Okay? And what made you go out to a golf event?

Uh?

Workie work. They said, hey, Shay, you're the best. Here's a ticket, and I was like, wait, what time? They were like, get there as early as you can. So I show up pretty damn early, and they got free booze and free foods. So I thought, today's a pretty good day to a slip back into old ways. So here I am.

Well, Dylan's going up there with picture Day. Ray. I believe tomorrow tomorrow afternoon, a little.

Little day day. That's cute.

Yeah, all okay, Dylan is contemplating the following eighteen eighteen eighteen.

Dylan explained, Well, there's the nine to ninety nine talent for baseball. So it's nine beers, nine hot dogs, and nine innings. I've seen eighteen eighteen eighteen eighteen beers, eighteen hot dogs, eighteen holes. I've done the nine nine nine challenge.

Okay, that's successful.

It is not easyde hot dogs seven eight and nine go down with cement.

Okay, how about this? How about eighteen nine eighteen.

Right, eighteen beers, nine dogs.

Yeah, eighteen holes. I kind of want to push myself though, Dan, Okay, I'm just the over under is eighteen nine eighteen.

Yeah, I could do that.

You take the over the under shade for me over, no problem, okay, bad Larry? What about you? I know you can have the eighteen beers in eighteen holes.

I'm eighteen five and eighteen.

That's my line. I need that. You know what you could probably do?

Yeah, I don't eat like very rare. I mean I eate one meal a day. That's it.

Well, the salt, the salt content alone, those beers go down like water.

Yeah, what are you going to do? Like kobayashi and you're gonna squeeze the bun.

I mean, if I were to go past nine, I think I would have to. I'd have to improvise a little bit. Don't you put it in water? You soak it and you start like mountain dew or some shit. Yeah, it's disgusting. By the way, nobody had a good week last week. Dylan lost two and a half, Shay lost two point two, and Bad Lady lost one. So Dylan's still up plus thirty two units thanks to his Future's bed on the Nuggets. Shay is up twenty three point eight units. Bad Larry plus six point two units. Anything

Dylan's nine units on the future. That's okay, But it's Nick Taylor's carried him thirty five units on a thrown a dart at a golf winner. And I'm gonna throw. I'm gonna throw under the bus to who took cup. Come on, I'm gonna hit. I'm gonna hit one golf guy. It's not going to be today though.

And it's Kopka. Uh yeah, like you shouldn't be able to bet on somebody you don't know how to pronounce their name, Larry.

These guys are going to golf tournaments. They shouldn't, they should win. I don't know anything about these guys. I got my boy sah Tagala again.

You know, actually that is pretty good, Larry, pronunciation wise.

All right, yeah, you got that one. He went to Pepperdine Uh Sahthagala. By the way, Mark Zuckerberg, Zuckerberg versus Elon Musk the potential to fight in the cage. Did you guys see this?

Oh yeah, okay minus five hundred?

Ol day you okay? So you would take Zuckerberg uh minus five hundred to beat Elon Musk in the cage?

Max batt push it.

Yeah all right, well then we have to wait to see I think Zuckerberg called out Elon Musk. I want to know if Jeff Bezos gets involved in this.

I think you must be Actually, I think Elon actually called out Mark zucker.

Yeah he did, yeah, yeah. And then Zuckerberg, who does what jiu jitsu? Yeah, he recently rigged a jiu jitsu match? Did We don't know if he rigged it, We don't know.

They drop your location?

Yeah, yes, yeah.

I would pay a lot of money to see a couple of billionaires beat the shoot out of each other.

I'll say that it would be the late time as long as there's no winner. I don't I don't want a billionaire to beat up another billionaire and there's a winner. I would like for them both to lose. They have to, Yesberg.

Isn't Zuckerberg like a decade younger than Elon? Yeah, you know, of course he's gonna win.

That's a big factor. Actually, yeah, but Elon Musk called out Zuckerberg. I mean it's not the other way around.

Yeah, I like Zuckerberg.

The kid's like thirty, right, he's like thirty nine? Is he?

How old he? And must it must fifty?

Then he's probably like fifty one or something like that.

Yeah, I don't want to Dan. I don't want to fight Dylan. I mean, the young guy's gonna kill him.

Would you fight Shan when you work that much money?

Yeah, Larry, let's go, how old you Shay?

Thirty nine?

Hard thirty nine?

Yeah, that's true, that's a hard thirty nine.

Yeah, I know that's still too Youngeah. No, I don't want to fight Shay either.

Uh.

I would beat the ship out of.

You, Larry.

Okay, now I want to fight him.

Let's go any other fight you want, any leg wrestler, whatever the hell you want to do.

Yeah for you.

No, then he's gonna say darts.

I'll be back.

We'll figure it out, all right, all right, all right, I'm more recapping both of you guys did not do very well with the golf, right whatever, Okay, and Dylan still has his futures. Bet on the Pirates winning the World Series plus thirty thousand. You should have bet on the reds.

Man right now.

Yeah, kind of the same team, I know, I know, playing well.

All right.

That leads us to bets for this week. Dylan will start with you. Since you're the clubhouse leader. Let's start with the Travelers Championship in Greater Hartford.

Alrighty, Dan, So today I got two units on some j M three ball plus one eight against Tommy Fleetwood and Jason Day. And then I.

Got a so he'll have a better score than than Fleetwood and Jason Day, so of.

The of the group banks, okay, all right? And then I got a unit on Justin Thomas top ten at plus five fifty. I don't know why.

I mean, where did he go? He plus fourteen at the Open?

That was hard to watch. I think he's already stinking up the joint today too. Who else you got, Larry, you got your voice Sahiti Gala to win and plus four thousand.

Last year he could have won it. Yeah, I think he came what tied second to Xanderschoff? Yeah right, yeah yeah.

And then the rook Sam Bennett top ten plus fourteen hundred.

Okay, they you know what? He did pretty well at the US Open. Yeah, he showed up in the big moments. What else do you have, obviously, Dan wnba season? Oh okay, full sure, sure, sure.

I have a parlay. All these games are today. I our Connecticut Son minus four and a half against the Lynx Chicago Sky plus three and a half against the Mystics and the Seattle Storm plus one and a half against the Indiana Fever they didn't even know as a team, plus five ninety five on that and then NBA Draft.

Where where is Elena Deladun playing.

She's on the Mystics.

She's still in the Mystics.

Yes, okay, she's been around for a while.

Right, yeah, great player, yeah, all the famer anything else?

Yep, I got one NBA draft pick. I'm going to Scoot Henderson to go number two overall, plus three seventy taking the value. Okay, there's obviously Brandon Miller's still the favorite, heavy favorite. Uh, Sir Lawrence, bad Larry.

We're going to go one unit on a bunch of golfers, okay, Rory to win it, just straight out when it's twelve. Okay, that's good. That'll get me back in to get ball game. Then I want one of you on these three guys for top tens.

Colin Moore kawa Hey, by the way, I was wrong. I thought he'd have a hard time making the cut at the Open, but Colin Moore Kallen played pretty well.

So Colin, then Cam Young and Match Fitzpatrick their top tens, and then top twenties Tommy fleetwood Son Jam and the afore mentioned.

So okay, all right, Oh I have.

One question, one more question, Dan, Yeah, did Calas Swift pick a boyfriend yet?

Not yet?

She went a week without a boyfriend.

Well, at least that we know of. She might have a boyfriend, we just don't know that.

Oh, it's not like you.

Have You've been on the downund.

I'm so interested in this now.

Yeah, you've been on the down low with women before, before you got married.

Larry's side piece.

Have you been a side piece Larry?

You never? Never, I don't even, I don't even think about it now.

No, but you weren't like another girl had a boyfrien friend and you were this side.

You were like you're in the stable.

You're not. You weren't her boyfriend, but you were in the picture.

I have one girl and it's enough.

No, no, no, not Now I'm saying before you got married.

Zero chance.

I can't even I can't remember before I was married, Shay.

How many times have you been the side A lot? Yeah?

I ruined a few happy homes, Danny, Oh.

Boy, yeah, including your own.

Well that's on the rocks.

Danny, Okay, I don't think that counted as a happy home beforehand.

Yeah, it has to be a happy home before you. You teared him. Uh. By the way, roommate, Hello, roommate, how's theater theater therapy? Maybe it is theater? How is the therapy for you?

We had a session yesterday, Danny and this guy, I mean, he really loved me because I was hilarious and whatnot. And the whole point of therapy is to get the therapist on your side, to be charming and you know, track that fault.

Yeah, so I won.

I won that round, and the son of a bitch at the end of it was like, hey, our next session is going to be two hours. And of course this bastar's two hundred and fifty bucks an hour, so he's selling us on five hundred dollars to save whatever mentally challenged emotions the roommate has.

So I'm screwed.

I'm screwed, Danny. You're just milking me.

Okay, but are you being honest in therapy or are you just trying to be with you?

Absolutely not.

Are you trying to be a show off, You're trying to be an entertainer.

No, I'm being charming. It's my own personal you know, personality traits, and I win, I win. I get him on my side, and that's all there is.

But he has to understand that if he's any kind of reputable therapist, that all you're doing is you're masking.

No, they don't get it, Danny, I'm that good. They don't see it coming.

Say, does this guy practice Tijuana?

No, he's a freaking new cane, And of course that's why he's started twitt a freaking out the Tijuana Connecticut.

All right, Shay is at the Travelers Championship in Greater Hartford. You, uh, you got a person to win?

Yeah?

I got a couple. I don't have it in front of me radosh okay. Uh, Patrick cantlaid to win plus seven hundred, Yes, and.

I got Rory plus. I think it's fourteen.

Plus fourteen hundred. You had can't lay to win the US Open last week as well? Love?

I love him?

Sorry, I love them. Okay, I love wind him too.

I don't know how it didn't bet on that.

You got baseball You normally have baseball bets.

Uh, I got four baseball bets.

Okay, you don't know these. I let me see raise giving these to me. You have the pod I don't know my middle name right now? The Giants? You got the Giants plus one ten against the Podres. Yeah, Royals plus three hundred versus the Rays had to take that. Yankees minus one fifteen versus Seattle. Yeah, Arizona minus one fifty versus the Nationals.

How about those Diamondbacks standing? I know I'm not getting enough attention.

I know, I know, I know. It feels like every five years, it's like the Marlins. Marlins every five years, it seems like they're in playoff contention and the year NBA Draft odds. Do you have anything that you want.

To I don't have any. No, it's going to be Wenby and I like that nickname. I don't care what you're saying in the radio. It's going to be Wemby number one. It's Scooter number two. That's it.

Oh, you got Scoot Henderson number two.

I don't at all. Okay, I don't care about the NBAK.

All right, I'm I'm just asking. I'm just asking. I'm just asking a question.

That's all.

By the way, there's making it at home tonight. There's a better DraftKings who put sixty thousand dollars on Wemby to be the first pick overall on the draft? You know how much the best you win? How much do you think he's going to win? He's got sixty k on Victor going number one in the draft. Four hundred bucks, three hundred gone?

What the hell.

Kind of free? Three hundred bucks?

Sixty grand to gamble? I am at the craps table in the VIP area, roll at hard sixties in parlay, and that's all there is to it.

And then that sixty k is gone immediately.

So what so what?

I have a good time, Well the golf.

Track, I agree.

Well, wait, what's the most money you've ever lost at craps?

Okay? Oh north of ten thousand? Dady?

Okay, bad Larry, the most you've ever lost?

That?

You you do poker.

Right, I'm early in my marriage. She had ten Grand's a good number, but not in craps and not in poker. You know, stupid table games could be blackjacket, could have been anything back then.

Oh so ten grand? But you you don't bet that kind of money now.

Not at all?

You paused there, ye you pause.

No, I was pausing to think through the last forty years. Yeah, no, I don't, no, no way ten grand anymore?

Hip Piper Ray, what do you have for me? Larry?

Didn't you get in trouble at the casino on Monday for taking a picture of the board to send it to us?

How much did you is on?

That was only like eight hundred bucks? On that hand? The dealer told me I couldn't take a picture, and my exact answer to her it was a black dealer, a girl. And she said you can't take a picture this and I said, oh no, three guys have to see this picture. And I just took it. What are they going to take my camera from me? It was a crisscross game, Shay, I don't know if you even know what It's a stupid table game down here. But the dealer is your partner. So it's down and across.

And just how many how many people just paused the podcast and stop listening?

How many they want paper to write down?

Wait?

Wait, why why does it matter if it's a black woman who is the dealer?

Because she wanted to tell me I couldn't take.

A well, but what does it matter?

Uh?

Oh, what does it matter?

Because an Asian dealer would have never done that.

Yeah, or a white woman never would have done that. What are you talking about?

I don't I don't think anyone else would have bothered me. Yeah, I don't think anyone else would have bothered me. It was just okay, well whatever, it doesn't matter, Larry, Larry January, we're doing.

It was a field.

Uh all right, say a couple of just a couple of advice to you guys out there, say you got to go on with a better attitude to this therapy.

I don't think wait, wait, wait, you're different. I think you're deflecting. Well, I'm coming back to you.

Dan.

You gave me Rory McElroy at twelve, and he just gave Rury mclaay to win the thing at fourteen to one to Shay.

I think he's gold on hold on picture day.

Ray.

So you remember when I told you guys all to send me your picks last night, and there were a few of you who might.

Not have done that.

The lines change, and that's why I wanted the night before so I can have uniform lines. But I don't think it's fair if the tournament's already started. So I took what rory was this morning. So Larry, yours is from last night. Shay yours is from this morning.

Yeah, you know that's a you know whatever. Okay, that's you know what.

I'll give you the two extra.

He just gave me hope now bad like he just gave you an explanation as to what happened. I'm not changing anything to you know, Curry favor with Shay.

Wellarry, here it's canceled.

Why are we talking to this? Yes? Yeah, Marvin. Do you think bad Larry should be canceled for next week? You may need to take a break for a while, you think, so oh this black. I was like, what the hell does.

That have to do it?

An?

You know what, I might want to be canceled next week because we going to bet on Pablo Swift's next boyfriend. There's nothing to bet on. There's no sports going on now. Baseball's too early in the season. The bet I don't bet hockey I don't care about.

There's no honky. There's no Honkey's happening.

How much I don't that's how much I don't care about it, right, I didn't even realize it was over.

Have you been drinking, Larry?

Not yet?

Okay, somebody call hr Larry.

Larry's Clarry's mid getting canceled. He's like, I think we should just take next week off the podcast.

Yeah, you know what, maybe we should.

We usually do take it off.

Maybe we will.

I've been drinking since eight thirty, and I'm doing better than Larry.

I just want everybody to realize, Hey, are you going tomorrow?

Okay, huh what are you?

Are you going tomorrow to the Travelers?

Absolutely not? Absolutely not.

Well, then you're gonna hang out with Dylan and Picture Day Ray.

Remember Danny, I'm sober. I can't be doing all that.

Oh oh, I see, good point, wink wink, you're sober.

Well if anybody asks, this is all just a character I put on for.

Are you still doing your podcast?

We've taken a couple of weeks off due to the sobriety. Okay, Hey the fuck you don't say hi no more? It's fucking awesome. Yeah, it's sucking up now. I got action, of course, I got fucking action. What do you think I'm doing here? I got can't way, I got Rory, I got fucking who else do I have? Danny?

That's it.

I think that's all you got.

I got some other shit going on. All right, I'm on the goddamn phone with Danny. Jesus fuck.

Okay, all right, go get him. You know what. You've got some side action going there's.

Work, motherfuckers.

It's gonna be a mess.

That's a mess today.

All right. Hopefully you're not driving.

Oh absolutely not.

Okay, good God. That's the message we'd like to send that. That's the message we want you to take away from this, if you take anything. Shaye and Irving Podcast. Eventually we'll get back up with some new episodes there. Shay, thanks for joining us from Greater Hartford, Cromwell to be exact and bad, Larry in Jersey in spring Lake, and Dylan right here in the man Cave, and we might talk to you next week. Here on Dan Patrick takes a gamble