This is Dan Patrick takes a gam.
Gambling was something that I did a clever way to circumvent Dan actually making bets himself by using a proxy, and I became consumed by it and now joined by Bad Larry and Dylan the graphics guy.
Here's Dan Patrick.
Oh did he live up to the billing? Bad Larry showed up yesterday at the man Cave and you know the reviews are in. Larry, I think everybody universally thought you were an ass. And I when I left you guys at the man Cave, and I forewarned you know, Ray and Dylan and some of the weeks, all the backroom guys. I said, hey, he's going to beat you every game, just so you know. And then about three or four hours later, I meet them at a bar, the pit Stop, and I walk in. I walk in,
and I don't see anybody. I just hear them yelling at each other. So they're over at the pool table. They're just yelling at each other, and I go, uh, here, bad Larry. I walk over and he goes, yeah, I haven't lost. I haven't lost a game yet, and yeah, you pretty much pissed everybody off, Larry. Congratulations that was the intent, Dan.
I think the the argument you walked in on, Dan was Larry saying that he could beat Michael Jordan in a free throw shooting about right.
It wasn't free throw. I've said it a million times in my life. I'm going to stand by it, not anymore. But fifteen foot jump shots till one thousand dollars shot till he quits.
Yeah right, oh my, that is really one of the dumbest things I've ever heard.
I don't care. I don't I don't care what you guys say.
Larry, are you talking about right now? Right now?
No? No, not no, not right now?
Well when remember when you said you could throw a golf ball one hundred yards? When when when were you able to do that? Like, you have to put in context these bets or these ran them things that you said, fish.
Tails saying thirty thirty years ago.
Thirty years ago you are going to take and you know they're fifteen footers. Those are called free throws.
Okay, make them eighteen footed. I don't care what you do.
Look at his.
Line every game, Dan, he's he's four for twenty one or six for twenty one, thirteen for fourteen from a foul on.
Okay, that's fifteen feet away.
It's also during a game, right, Yeah, here's other factors, Larry.
You like re breakaway dunks, So instead of being seven for twenty one, he was take those three away and he was three for eighteen or four for eighteen. He wasn't a great shooter. He was a great scorer. We agree. We agree on that.
What what he wasn't a great shooter. His percentage when he retired is what forty seven percent from the floor? Yeah, it sounds all right, Yeah that that would be pretty good, Larry. I think let me get ready to pull up the numbers on Michael Jumon.
Well, you know, like Bird and hey he's us field goal percentage are pretty comparable. Bird is a way better shooter.
Would you beat Bird?
Michael don't? Yeah, Michael had.
Larry better. Yeah, Larry, Larry, are you a better shooter than me?
Yes? Whoa long?
You said you were better than Michael Jordan and Larry Bird before you said that.
Yeah, I figured he would say it, but he's Larry.
I didn't say Larry Bird. Don't change the Dylan. I just think Michael Jordan is an overrated shooter. He was a great scorer. He wasn't a good shooter. And you know what, when he missed a shot, he walked to the foul one with a ball whether there.
We go, there we go? I mean Jordan. Did Jordan shoot forty seven percent or better?
Better than that? Forty nine?
All those breakaways say that all the time, that he was double teamed and knocked down? Yeah, your nuts, Larry, Yeah.
And then when he missed the shot, they it was a foul and then a shot.
Anymore, Larry, he shot eighty three percent from the free throw line.
Too, so he can make some foul shots. I'll give him a fast.
Eighty three percent. I'll give him his foul. Larry, You're not a better shooter than me. You know that. You know that.
Not anymore? Dan, you have a gym in your office.
What does that have to do with anything?
Thirty damn thirty years ago, I'll give you that same bet too.
Oh my god. But see, it's all stuff that can't be proven. So it's all bullshit.
You can say whatever you want, Yeah you can.
You could say whatever you want thirty years ago. I could have whatever. It doesn't mean Michael Jordan is shooting on something you could do now, Larry, I can throw it a hundred yards.
I'll never lose a game in caps to anyone.
Who loss like I could beat you and throw the stick that he plays at home all the time, and I'm like.
I haven't beat you and kissed the can.
Also, Ray and I, Ray and I, uh disproved the golf ball theory at the golf course the other day. We're just trying to throw the golf ball. We also got an argument if you could throw a baseball or a golf ball further? We all said golf. Well, actually, Ray was the only one said baseball. You can for sure throw a baseball further. N Yeah, I did too.
It's wrong.
Okay, you guys are out of your mind here.
Yeah, thirty years ago, I could throw it under yards.
Why do you Why do you think you could throw a baseball further? It's heavier. Can you throw a basketball further?
Or little physics?
But you can. You can also grip a baseball you can't like better?
Yeah? With your tiny hands.
Yeah, actually, Larry, I was my biggest takeaway from you coming was you were a little shorter than I thought you'd Yeah, and the beer gut was actually a little bigger than I thought it was.
And your hands were way smaller than I thought you and you had a club.
I doubt that.
Really, small hands layer. And you know what they say about guys with small hands unhappily married. No, no, no, no, small gloves, the small.
Gloves, and they can beat Jordan in a shooting cont absolutely, okay, let me, let me recap, let me recap, Dylan, You're lost a half a.
Unit last week.
No, I won half unit.
Oh you won a half unit. Okay, so your minus ten and a half big difference. Shaye went neutral last weeking bone contention, Danny, if you got a minute on the l base ball, I went too and two, but I won plus one fifteen twice lost plus one seventy and laying the minus one twenty lost that. So okay. So as far as the odds go, I'm plus what it like, Okay, I'm betting a unit on the dogs, on the dogs, on the dogs, I'm betting a unit to win whatever the plus number is.
Like if the one won one point exactly on.
The favorites, I'm laying it to win one unit. So this this is baseball betting, Danny. It's like explaining the sunrise. But explain it to Ray, right, and really dumb yourself down to be able to explain it. Fair, fair picture day. Ray. Okay, listen to what I just fucking said. Compute it. I ain't gonna chew my cabbage twice. Figure it out, all right, do some math. I'm missing units, Danny, a lot of units, right? So is he getting one unit or a half? What is he getting? Ray?
A guy like point three on that?
I think, what's he get it?
So he's gonna get point three on that? But I'll defend myself a little bit here.
We used to do the decimal points and then we got rid of it last year because we were thinking we were just gonna round it out.
And what's the point of betting a dog? Right? What's the point? Why would I ever bet a dog again?
All Right, I'll make sure it's on there for now.
Lost two and a half units last week, so you're a loser plus eleven and a half units, Larry, you're good with that?
Yeah? I don't. I just say you lost a minus one seventy.
No, plus one seventy. I lost a plus one seventy money line, then a minus one twenty I got.
I think you should get a little plus one.
I'm down to then I won plus one fifteen twice, so I'm up. I'm up ten cents. Uh. Dylan still has the big bet on the board with the Nuggets to win the NBA Finals plus nine hundred.
Great, and don't forget about the Pirate's.
Still in the World Series plus thirty thousand. Okay, uh. Bets for this week, Shay, I'm gonna start with you. It seems like you had a bad week last week. You weren't allowed to drink, you got in trouble with your roommate and still in trouble. Yeah, and not drinking. Still not drinking. Sober Nanny. It's great. I love it. You get to spend more time as soon as you start drinking than I'll come over to your house to do your I know, I'm looking forward to it. And
she's gonna cook something. You ever had a cocoa Vaughn No, the chicken no, oh, Danny. Okay, but the last time you were so pissed off at your wife that you said, I don't want you to come over because the food's going to be crappy. Exactly. That's what she does. Was she going to make a bad meal on purpose? Absolutely? Because I was coming over? Yeah, no, no, no, because I'm in trouble, Like she knows. Why do I get penalized for you fucking up? Because you'd be in the house, Danny.
She knows when I'm in trouble. She knows the way to my heart is through my stomach. And if she makes bad food, it's because she's mad at me. She can cook, she can really cook.
And then Dan would just be guilty by association.
Yeah, absolutely, right, like we had what do we have last night? So when she sees me, she sees you eat, she wants to punish that. She would like burn ribs to hurt me. She would she would lash out in pain. All right, that's what she does. All right, But if I come over, I'm going to come over when you're out of the doghouse. Yeah, I'll be out of the doghouse next week. No, this whole month is going to.
Be Something tells me you're going to get an extra week, and this.
Whole this whole month is kind of lost. But July, yeah, it's my birthday month. We'll be all right, Yes again, birthday. What's been your longest punishment when anytime she's pregnant three times every time. Yeah, nine months, nine months of pains. Really, Oh yeah, she's mean as hell. She's pregnant, men as shit. She eats everything, cooks nothing. It's bad.
No drinking.
She yells at me, cusses me out. Yeah, I gotta go get her water all the time. It's bad, really bad. But you're lucky. I like kids. Otherwise i'd have zero because she is the worst pregnant woman in the world. She is violent. She wakes up every morning and chooses violence when she's pregnant every morning. How about we we turn our attention to It's hard, Danny. I know bets for this week, Shay. I'm gonna start with you. What do you have for me? I got Miami plus three
and a half against Denver. I think they're gonna, you know, give a last gasp before they lose that series. And then I got used in Baseball lay in the one twenty, So I'm betting. Don't explain it. I'm vetting a dollar twenty to win a dollar and That's what I'm doing, right Verlin her plus one fifty five Againstrider. I got the White Sox once again. Plus one ten. That's a second game. There's a double header today, bang bang biscuit small permitting, will yet air quality? Right the second game?
The second game should be fine? Yeah, I think I think both. It seems like it's okay, it's better today. Yeah, yesterday smell like smoke everywhere? One. No, it was bad, bad, bad. Larry your bets for this week?
Okay? Are we counting what we did last night or now?
Yeah?
Yes you are, Okay, that's fine. I have just three baseball games, and then I did late at a Belmont bet. But the three baseball bets.
Wait, what did you win from last night?
No? I went to and two?
Oh okay, all right, So you had Joker over fifty and a half points, rebounds and assists.
Yeah, it was fifty two and a half more I bet. I bet it at fifty two.
Okay, but you lost it. No, No, he won that one. Jimmy Butler over thirty nine and a half rebounds, assists in points. Okay, the Nuggets money line won and gave Vincent over eighteen and a half points, rebounds and assists. You lost that, right, lost that? Okay?
He went to double o seven. I think gave Vincent.
Okay, what do you have down today?
I have? I got when three pitchers who I recognize, the Dodgers for the Mets, VI Orlander and Game one of the Yankees with Severino. I'm just one unit each, right, and then I want a little one unit exactly box and the Belmont six seven eight.
I want to follow that. Okay, one on those absolutely that exact. Bet Okat, come on, Layer, let's go okay here who.
Said for ships and giggles?
I want to do that, but not box a trifected eight seven six in order?
Wow?
Wow? And if that wins, I'm retiring.
Oh okay, promise.
Now what else do you have? Dyling so bad?
Layer, You're done right, yep?
Just okay seven eight exactly box.
Okay.
So last night I had Nuggets min is three under two fourteen and Aaron Gordon first basket which did not hit for Game four, I'm going two units Nuggets minus three and a half.
I think they just.
Are you gonna go Aaron Gordon first basket again?
This is so Dan, I have a new strategy where I'm betting Aaron Gordon first basket until it fucking happens.
Last night, he literally under the basket gets fouled.
Okay, it's plus one thousand yep. Okay, So throwing anything else with the game tomorrow.
Night, taking the under two ten and a half. I'm also just betting the under every.
Game, okay, anything else?
MLB unit on Mets Braves under eight and a half today and then tomorrow Mariner's money line against o'tanny and the Angels fall. And then tonight Golden Knights Panthers under six goals.
They have to not score like one hundred.
Goals one of these games, so why not tonight they're averaging eight goals a game.
Yeah, so far okay? Us anything else?
Yeah, And the RBC Canadian Open.
Dan Taylor, well known Canadian top ten finish plus thirty five hundred.
Well known Brian Boitana.
It is Brianana, isn't it.
Mackenzie Hughes is he another?
Yeah, Cory Corner, and then there's a bunch of other I was like looking down the leader board and there's just like a pack of Canucks at the bottom.
I've never even heard of.
Can't trust Adam Hadwin.
I think Adwin's Canadian beard, some French Canadian guy's name. I forget and can't pronounce Jim Carrey, Yes, Jim Carrey, Neil Young.
Neil Young, Steve Nash, Steve, Justin Bieber, Justin Biebs. Yeah, who is the best Canadian though?
Ever? Ever? Ever?
Wayne?
Actually?
Yeah, wayn Wayne.
I think everyone in Canada would probably say that too. Justin Bieber would probably say that.
Rji Bier.
Yeah, j Brett. He's look sort of the Wayne Gretzky of the NBA. He's looking better and better now as of recently. Oh, Jamal Murray's Canadian.
Okay, Uh, don't trust him. So that's it. I think that we've we've accomplished what we set out to do here today. And uh, Shay is looking at the white clause, but he's not allowed to have any white claws. Dylan has one. I'm sure bad Larry has a Budweiser in his future.
Yeah, later on tonight. I have a coke already from raised, but I'm heading back to meet a couple of boys over there. Mister, what are you doing? A few boys over there?
Whoa we do?
We're gonna go have lunch. What are you doing? Am I doing? Oh?
It's the same thing you do every day? Yeah, Okay, Shay and Irving has podcast wherever you get your podcast, And once again you have not brought up your wife
as a degenerate. No, the year cannot yet. But if she keeps going the way she's going, Danny, I mean, she might be, but but she listens to this or friends of yours listened to friends she's informed friends of hers, so friends of mine, I should say, listen to this, and then they talked to their wives about this, and then their wives talk to my wife about this, and the roommate just knows everything, which is blasphemy and awful. You
don't have any energy today. You were down in the dumps man, you were Charlie Brown today, a little sickly DJ depression. They just keep playing the same song over and over. What would your song be? You remember the mash suicide is painless? Yeah, yeah, that's me right now. Okay, well it's depressing, nanny.
What do you even do on the weekend? Me hang out with my kids, crochet or something.
We got soccer, we got softball, we got uh dance, we got all kinds of crap. They do ballet some shit. Yesterday my kids started telling me that she's going to do acro dance. I said, what the fuck is an acro I don't think you said what the fuck is? I think on it? Okay uh, And then she said it's acrobats plus dancing. So now she's doing two different
kinds of dance. So that means two different titles, two different times that I got to show up at some stupid auditorium at Fairfield and figure out where my family is and what they're doing. And then if you're not paying attention after the dance, the kid says, you weren't even looking at me. What were you doing? Well, I was checking the goddamn score, That's what I was doing, because it's fucking Saturday in the fall, Like, what do you want from me? Yeah?
Yeah, that's not really fair.
No, you have to get them familiar with what your lifestyle is all about. They know, they know, damn well, the roommate loves to block information, but they know, damn well. Wait, how young is your youngest? Two? No? Yeah, two, she'll be three in December. She sent me a video of her at the kitchen table. I was like, oh my god, she's nuts. She's my most violent child. If we had her first, i'd have one kid. She is the most violent child I've ever been around in my life. She's nuts.
That's same with my youngest. Yeah, they're violent. She she was difficult. She hits the other kids, hits them like in the face. My youngest used to bite my other kids in the stomach. Yeah, bite them right in the stomach. That's aggressive, Yes, it is. It's like a diabetes. Sugar beaties. You got beat us, you got beat us. Uh, well, thanks for joining us. And Dan Patrick takes a gamble? Boy,
did I take a gamble? Larry? It was great seeing you and we hope to see you again here in the neighborhood soon.
I will be I will be back up when she starts drinking again.
Thank you.
I'm certainly not coming up. I'm certainly not coming up with him not drinking.
Yeah, it was lame, but the fuck Larry.
Well, we weren't good enough entertainment.
I don't think you guys were guys were fun.
But I want I want it all, Greg Pillon, I appreciate I appreciate you showing me around Olford.
Thank you, Larry.
Also, I'm doing on the record that I did beat Larry and pool lost everything else, but I want that on the record and Larry game of pool.
It was kind of like, you know, have you ever played a brill and the the q boll is neutral until your last shot. That's the way I play.
All of a sudden, he'd you know, and we'll talk. We'll talk to you next week on Dan Patrick Takes a Gamble m hm