Episode 69: Big White Stiff

This is Dan Patrick takes a camp.

Gambling was something that I did a clever way to circumvent Dan actually making bets himself by using a proxy, and I became consumed by it and now joined by Bad Larry and Dylan the graphics guy.

Here's Dan Patrick.

All right, ready to go. Everybody's here here for you. Bad Larry, Shay all right, Dylan locked in?

All right?

Nobody was last week. Dylan lost one unit, Shay lost three, Bad Larry lost three, But Bad Larry is still the only one in the plus category plus six. No Kentucky Derby winners, So you guys lost a total of seven units last week. On that Larry did send Ray a winning Derby bed, but it wasn't on the show, so it doesn't count.

Larry.

Yeah, I didn't expect it to count. We were just okay, okay, you understand.

Uh.

They scratched a couple of horses early in the morning and we had that two dollars across the board bet on like ten horses.

Yeah.

But when we when we record this on Thursday, that's the show of record.

Yeah. I know, I'm not looking for any I'm not looking at for any credit for the Derby.

Well you're not getting any you say, it is kind of impressive, lair.

You did take half the field and still not hit the horse sun there, so like mathematically kind of.

That is that is almost impossible to do a bad layer. Uh Shay, you went to a sports t Haven, which is an O t B. How did that go on Saturday?

It didn't go very well because I never made it.

Oh yeah, what happened Friday?

Well? Uh, Friday with Cinco.

Were you? Were you in Sinco or I was out of Sinco to my I.

Was, I had a great night, Danny. Uh and then just Saturday kind of disappear in front of me. It just didn't work out.

That's what happened.

I left here or no, I left work at noon on Friday on Friday, and I got home at like two in the morning. Where did you go? I went to our favorite wing spot. Oh yeah, I went there until about five, Okay, Then I went to Typico until about I don't know, and then I ended up at new Haven at some bar.

So you still made it to new Haven but couldn't make it into the Oh man, it was sports.

No, I was? It was a I guess it was a Mexican restaurant or bar. I remember the bartender asking me, have you been to our other locations? And I said, dude, I don't know where the funk.

I am right at this location.

I don't know where I am? Am?

I am I at.

This location this place.

He was like, oh, yeah, did anybody else have war story stories for SINKO to mine?

Bad Lair.

I know you probably just had your usual bud one.

What about you do?

I actually ended up going to I zagged and went to an Italian restaurant okay, and was drinking non Mexican cocktails for the night. And then actually on Saturday, I just delayed Synco to my O, so then I celebrate on Saturday.

Wasn't sink on Friday?

Yeah?

Right right? Yeah? The Derby was on Saturday, Bad Larry.

Anything interesting this weekend?

I had to go to my aunt's eightieth birthday party and that's where that's where I watched the derby with the man.

You have three.

Hundred of her closest friends.

That is great, Wait, Larry, your aunt's.

Eighty yeah, well my wife's ant. Yes.

I was just thinking, you're what sixty five gotta be.

Seventy, that's pretty good.

Sixty five and your answer fifteen years the generation ahead of you. That's where it works. That's where it works anywhere outside of Appalachia.

All right, all right, Toche, what let's see recapping bad Larry?

You did?

All right? You got the heat to beat the Knicks, Celtics, beat the seventy six ers, Lakers to beat the Warriors. You lost your Justin Verlander going back to Detroit. You got the Suns minus three versus the Nuggets. Kentucky Derby didn't do well. What do you have for me this week?

I'm just back with a couple one unit bets for two of the games tonight, and then I'm betting my heat again tomorrow night against the Knicks. Okay, So one unit on the games tonight, Celtics and the Suns.

That's two and a half Celtics minus two and a half and son to minus three. Yes, yeah, okay.

And then I went to heat tomorrow night minus five against.

Xt Okay, are we surprising that the Celtics are minus two against the seventy six Ers in that game?

They're going to play hard on that.

That's Philly. Yeah, I'm a little worried about it, but I think the Celtics Tatum is gonna have a monster game. Then I have some player props, just one units on these player props. There's not much action, you know tonight. I want Joel and Bibe over to his points.

That'd mean what they twenty nine and a half.

Okay, I'll take that twenty nine and a half. And then Jason Tatum over his.

Points twenty nine and a half, twenty nine and a half.

And then I have Luca.

No, we're telling no, no, no no, I let him have it. Okay, you want to take Luca over points?

Correct and over? What was all this? No? No nos?

Because Luca plays for the MAVs.

I know it's tomorrow night.

Well, the MAVs aren't playing.

Big white stuff.

We had a hunch those guys joker.

Joking, that's what I want over points and over.

Wow, God, I should have just let you leave that one out there.

I was sound asleep when I got the pet.

No, no, here we go, here we go. Yeah, made the mistake, he thought, I.

Want to I want the big white stiff who got robbed by the out of the m v P.

You do want a big white stiff, don't you? God? What a big.

White all white guys look alike to.

You, Larry, those two do all right?

Uh shay?

Anything you want to recap from last week?

Not really?

All right? Let me move ahead.

Well, the push the Lakers Warriors push was fucking brutal. I need like six points, yeah with two minutes left, and I couldn't get it. Yeah.

Okay, So this week.

Yeah, Celtics minus two and a half, Denver plus three, Heat minus four and a half. Knicks are done. Knicks are freaking done. Okay. Uh And then baseball, I got San Diego Minnesota game over eight runs. You Darbis will give up one dinger in the first inning, I guarantee it, White Sox, can you bet on that? Then? I should have bet on the first five is what I should have bet.

We're run in the first inning.

We're run in the first inning because he just loves throwing softballs in the first inning.

You might be able to find a home run in the first inning.

It's a prop race if you can find it. What else do you have shown?

White Sox laying one O five against the Royals and the Rays tonight night game minus one fifteen against Hermond. I don't trust them. I don't trust them at all.

You like the White Sox, though, don't you bet on the White Sox or to the White Sick.

I think they're undervalued. I think they have a better lineup than how they're playing. They're just not playing well lately. But I think you can squeeze value out of them like this should be. They're horrible, not horrible, Danny. They just don't have a good record. It's long, it's a long season. It's one and sixty two.

To strap wait it out. It's actually nothing.

So exactly, I think they're better than their playing.

So if I say you're a horrible driver and you go no, I just have a bad.

Record, exactly.

Okay.

The cops are everywhere, yeah, around, especially when I got this tattoo show.

I'm not a criminal. I just have a criminal record.

I made a huge mistake with a placement of this tattoo, because every time you get pulled over, the cop comes to the driver's side window and they just see a big old thirty eight snub nose.

Well, if you're as smart, you get the thin blue line flag.

Out here to help you didn't.

Did you give it a lot of thought when you got it on that side of your head.

No, no, none, okay, I didn't think you did.

No, okay, Dylan, what do you have for us?

Let's see, Yeah, not too much to recap. I did hit the under and the Mets Tigers under seven and a half. Nothing from the derby. My Nuggets future looking pretty good, Dan, Yeah, they're now the favorites. Yeah, but moving on to this week. We got the Byron Nelson in golf. This week, I'm taking Scottie Scheffer top five pretty much even money for four units, and I think to win it. He was like plus three fifty or something at the start.

Yikes. Jordan Speith won't be in it, out of it, yeah, shameful. Yeah, Texas boy, yeah, classic.

Yeah. And then some NBA. I'm taking the Warriors to win the series against the Lakers.

Plus two hundred.

That's spicy.

And then tonight first basket parlay, oh pardon Hardon and Durant parlay that pays out plus forty three hundred, and then I'm actually gonna add a couple. I'm gonna bet some of the other games tonight, so I'm taking the Sixers plus two and a half, Nuggets plus three, and then tomorrow Nix's plus four and a half.

Shaye and Larry both had the Celtics and they so math you're fading them and fading them.

I love that, I'm fading you. Anything else there?

Yeah, and then crackhead cracking money line stars plus one sixty.

Yeah, uh, let's see. I think that's I saw the betting line for the first game of the season. The Lions are getting seven against Kansas City Chiefs.

I like the Lions a little too much there. Super Bowl hangover for the Chiefs and they suck at covering the spread.

They kept everybody in games last year.

Every time you felt like and there'd always be like a ten point favorite.

Or something like that, Like it's always a usually healthy line.

Even in the playoffs.

That Jags game, Yeah yeah, yeah, Dicey, that feels like a thirty twenty four Chiefs win. Yeah, something like.

Yeah, go one in under the spread.

Uh So, Larry, I know you'll be glued to the set to watch Luka Doncic tonight. That'll be that'll be great. Anything that needs to be mentioned, any further word on you joining us in person for the first time ever. That's a no, unbelievable.

Yeah, I'm just trying to think when I when I can't get up there.

You don't have a job, truly, what do you have to do like on a given day?

I mean, what are you afraid of?

Larry missing happy hours my wife and my sister in law at five thirty? Are you I was if I was in Milford, I wouldn't be able to make that happy hour.

Loser.

That is suppressing.

That's the worst excuse I've ever heard in my life. I'm going to hang out with my wife.

You get happy instead?

And her sister, Oh my god, are you do you have? Are you lonely?

No? Not in the least. Last night, so I do my player props, and last night I had I took Robinson over six and a half. The guy can't make file shots for the next cover that he's I have Randall needing a twenty two and a half. The end of the third quarter, he goes he has twenty one. He goes to the line, he makes the first one for twenty two and then misses the second one. Now the next run is hype game. He's your best player.

He doesn't what are you talking? He's not their best player.

Jalen Brunts is their best player he's involved in their offense. He played the whole fourth he had. He had a shitty first quarter, one seven or something, got most of it out, great second quarter, great third quarter. He's sitting on twenty two. He doesn't. He plays the whole game, the whole rest of the game. If it wasn't for Robinson missing that foul shot at the end of the game, that did little scrum where Randall got to read the loose ball and just laid it in cup to cover

But they might cover four and a half.

Five on my paper, right, I heard both forore and half thank you? Yeah, I think they get blown. Butler didn't even you know, Jimmy Butler didn't even play. He just kind of hung out. He's gonna take over the game in Miami.

I agree, Shaye. Why did you write that word on your paper that was for dyling? You're fading me called him a prick.

Prick?

Yeah, okay, I didn't know who he could have been, you know, referral to anybody in this room.

I think it.

Yeah, yeah, So it's not Larry that you wrote that.

No, Larry and I are on the same side this week. Let's go Larry bets. There we go.

All right, well that's a good sign. Well what do you have, Ray? I got one thing.

So with the schedule coming out today, right, Cowboys nine and a half over under for wins this year, same as the Ravens.

You guys are both fans who wins more games?

Well wait, wait, don't we wait till next week.

We got to see the schedule.

Let's do that next week. Yeah, well we'll do a future and.

Say, no one's given you enough credit for fading just betting under Dallas Cowboys for the first half of games, because I did that a lot this year, and that was says back, that.

Was bat first half under the Cowboys. It's most it's good.

That's a great that's a great bet.

Trust the guys.

The situation wins for them this year.

That's a lot.

I would I don't care what the schedule is, I would take under that.

I'm scared.

Yeah, it feels like they're going to win ten on the Knillies feels sick. Yeah, yeah, and then seven uh bad Layer will leave the light on for you. If you ever happen to get up this way, we'd love to uh go out.

I will, I will yo what you will.

I will definitely give you a day's advanced notice when I'm coming.

Larry will dress up as your wife.

Sh I'll bring the Xanax layer be okay, and I'll bring the wine coolers, and.

We'll have a designated driver.

No, no, I'm the designated driver.

No way, no way, I'm getting a car with you now. No, these guys that.

Are getting the car with you, they never met you.

They're not getting in a car when they see you. Now they will.

Five minutes after we meet, we'll be going out somewhere.

Well I know that. But you're not driving because guys, you're going to be drinking. Maybe Marvin could could drive you. Guys, Marvin, would you be the d D because you don't drink?

I mean, okay, Marvin will just hammer Shirley Temples.

You don't drink.

I'm drinking a white cloth.

Yeah, I know. Talking about this is like you don't drink if you're drinking a white cloth.

Marvin can go to a bar and not drink. I think is more the the scale set.

That's impossible.

Yeah, yeah, no he's not Marvin, I love you. You're not invited.

You seem like you're itching to drive playing the car. I am driving, uh.

Shaye and Irving podcast there wherever you get your podcast Shayan Irving and you could get more of what you've gotten today.

Did you see the mommy author who killed her husband and they wrote a book about it?

No, Gend of the Year candidate Casey Anthony.

She poisoned him with fentanyl. Then after he died, she wrote a book about grief.

Damn, that's a long con Oh yeah.

Big fan of hers. I'm going to write letter in prison.

She's going to be in prison when you write the letter about you.

No, no, no, right, well you could both be in there together. Yeah, they have conjugal visits. Right, what's the name of that?

Right? Are you with me?

Are you with me?

I am with her? And it ain't Hillary.

That is kind of like OJ writing if I did it and then if was in like size three five and I did it and.

He quotation, Wow, she's a striking I know.

Yeah, she did the right thing. Look at her.

I feel like that happens with the mom murderers, as they're often decent looking.

Yeah, Lorena was good looking, Casey Anthony, yep it lorraina bobbit. Yeah, oh daughter, Ye, she murdered. She murdered his manhood. That is, she murdered his future, that's for sure, and threw it up the window. Mutilated, I think is what she tried to name our daughter, Lorena the third one. What do you mean she's a feminist hero? Come on, honestly, did your wife yeah she was in the roommate was like, absolutely not your I always say your wife, please don't.

Danny, but you love her? Yeah, Mother's Day weekend, alright, what could happen?

I could get kicked out, that's no.

If you're not kicked out already.

That's fair. She's got a lot of patience, that is Yeah.

I think there's a there is God.

I'd love to just do a reality show to watch her.

Absolutely there.

You got to be a different dude when you're at home. You're probably the doting dad and dad I am the ultimate husband, lovey dovey.

I don't I don't know which is the washer or which is the dryer? Like, I can't tell you.

What that's for clothes, not the don't put the plates in there.

I don't touch the dish washer.

I don't I put the plates in the dryer. Hunt if you run through a lot of.

Plates, if you fuck it up the first time, like changing the diaper, you put it on backwards or inside out. Yeah, and the dishes, you just break all the wine glasses and the laundry. You just make everything pink. She's never gonna want you to do ship ever.

Again, that's a classic technicians.

Go to work and come home. That's it. Man.

The more a nepty are it's something, the less likely you're going to have to do it. Break everything, stain everything well.

Shay and Irving podcast wherever you get your podcasts, and thanks for joining us on Dan Patrick takes a gamble and we will talk to you next week.