Episode 67: 100 Years Old

This is Dan Patrick takes a gam.

Gambling was something that I did a clever way.

To circumvent Dan actually making bets himself by using a proxy, and I became consumed by it and now joined by bad Larry and Dylan the graphics guy. Here's Dan Patrick.

Oh.

They didn't think we would be back this week, but we are bad Larry. I'm here, Okay, are you in a cemetery on a float?

No, no, I'm a I had a friend stay over the last couple of days and I had to drive him back to the airport and he had to stop at Rutger School of Dentistry first. I just pulled them in my driveway now so I couldn't send my picks in a very week day for us anyway, don't you can't do you can't bet the draft.

Oh you're calling silly.

Isn't that anything?

What are you doing? Do you understand? It's Dan Patrick takes a gamble where you gamble on everything. Larry. Okay, here, Larry, this.

Is not to gamble on the draft, but I can't. I can't wait till we get our death pool going.

Yeah. Oh no, cup here it is uh, everyone's over under for death.

What's the line, Larry? How old are you?

Sixty five? I got, I got, I got thirty good years and then.

No, no, you you think you're gonna diet ninety five.

I'm gonna take under seven.

I want, I want, I want the line to be one hundred, and I'm still take any.

Overhaul, Larry.

Seventy two is a perfectly acceptable number.

A guy like you not happening.

There's there's no way you have thirty good years.

Man, there's zero stress in my life. There has never been any stress in my life.

Because you could get hit by a bus tomorrow.

Yeah, but your stress is always you know, listening to your wife that you got to go to some regatta too, right, right.

If you just roll with those punches, that's fine, Okay, all.

Right, Shay, under seven you got less than seven years to live. Absolutely no for you or Larry. Oh, for Larry, I'll be all right.

Wait once you're over under my Opah made it to eighty Okay, how many years do you think you have left?

And how old are you?

Thirty nine? I think if I make it to seventy two, I'll be happy.

I'm gonna take the under Jesus, I No, this is just scientific.

It's not personal.

It's supposed to be. Well, it is personal because I know I know what's already happened to you mathematically.

I'm putting everything on the under what okay, under seventy two, Dylan, I should get a handicap because I have a lot more runway than these two.

Okay, well, no, okay, how many more years? And how old are you?

I'm twenty seven, God, I mean, unbelievable. Thirty five looks pretty good.

I'm going to go over thirty five.

I would set it. I would set it at a hard seventy.

I'll go over that. You're weak.

I'm going to go under that.

Sixty nine.

Yeah, I'm gonna go under that.

No, he's gonna soften up in his old age. You think, oh yeah, dude's gonna sober up with the grandkids all that bullshit.

That's when you die.

I drink because of my family. That's my fucking drink. Got three daughters, Danny, Oh, I know, I got three daughters.

I'm going childless. I'll be like a hundred.

Okay, so bad. Larry thinks he's gonna live to be one hundred.

Shay's gonna I'm going one hundred. Dylan, I'm gonna take the over on you with seventy. Also, yeah, and Shay, just as I want you around, I'm gonna take the over and all three of.

Us thank you.

There is a wrinkle where by the time I'm seventy, advancements in medicine might actually keep me alive longer than you two. Okay, Shay, not too far behind. Larry, you're probably fucking you're fucker because I got.

I look to be. If I look to be one hundred, that might get me one ten.

You're never gonna make it to one hundred, Larry.

You have shut off to the first point.

Larry, you're not You're not, and you were so far down on the liver transplant list.

You you drink a twelve pack of coke every day.

Larry, you're gonna die at the kitchen table. I'm saving, placing bets, that's right, writing up your.

Card, calling your boogey.

Yeah, the car accident might be a thing, because yeah, I still hasn't come back one hundred percent.

So you're driving.

I'm not dying in a car everywhere.

You're going to die in the car.

You do drive everywhere all right, recapping what.

I have a I have a couple of best with people here. They're all younger than me. For me to win, I have to live ten years after they die. Collect Yeah, that's I don't like to do a couple of them when you guys.

Don't be dead.

Wait, who do you pay their spouse?

Yeah, we'll have to have to put the money somewhere.

Okay, that's It's the dumbest thing of it.

I don't want I don't want to do that. Bet stupid they're younger. Yeah, it sounded we we had just ended that and it was a great segment, and then you took it to another level. You know what you did. You just killed something. You just killed a segment, is what you did. Okay, Dylan won three and a half units last week. He's at minus ten, Shay lost four. You're now at plus five. Bad layer, you're at plus eight after losing five units last week. So everybody, okay with.

That golf show.

I just you do this all the time, like there's always an excuse.

They didn't he didn't make the cut. I'm not that's an excuse. I'm I'm saying it's a bad pick by me.

Okay, uh Calves and the Knicks you uh you missed that one right, Okay, and then you had Colin more Cowen Maxhoma. You didn't do well there, correct, Okay, thank you? I agreed, agreed, thank you? Uh shay, you pretty much lost just about everything you bet on.

Yeah, yeah, baseball.

Listen, Baseball is a long fucking season. I'm okay going one for four one.

Can you make money betting baseball? Oh yeah, oh yeah, because I did it one year. I did it one year.

Okay. I had a friend who said, baseball is the if you know what you're doing, you can make money off baseball easier than you can the other It's true.

The plus money is what saves you. I mean today, the plus money bets that I have, I mean Minnesota plus one oh five versus the Red Sox that I lost. I'll take that better be God damn day. Okay, that should have been minus well.

And you get the extra wrinkle with like pitching matchups and stuff like that.

Dylan didn't do well early with the golf. In fact, you know John Daly and David Duvalden wins.

Yeah, I gotta random text.

I send him a text I'm like, a dude, your your duo. They just bowed out. They made him quit.

It wasn't even it was just the article that says John Daly and David do All withdraw their record is setting high.

They were like plus fourteen.

That was the last time I looked. I was like, all right, I think that one's you have a valiant effort.

Nuggets to win the NBA Finals still Tank Davis, you.

Call it man body shot?

Yeah yeah yeah, Uh Sea Dragons you had that minus eight and a half.

Of course, no, Sea Dragons.

Denucci the genius. The nuts can't say it anymore.

You got a genius?

No, you can't do I have to ridiculous. I'm running a show. I spent forty years trying to build up some credibility and you're trying to bring it down one fucking morning. Fucking Italian's Dandy. Nobody to win the series against the Bruins.

Still alive. They wanted o t last night.

Plus two hundred. Okay, bets this week we start with Larry. Uh, well, Ray do you have you don't have his pick? Okay, Larry, what are your picks this week?

Okay? I gonna go back to that pays Danny Ogain hard to see when I was driving. I don't have it.

You're driving.

I gotta go back to the page. I have the Celtics tonight minus the six and a half, all right, I want the over in the Golden State game. It's probably like two thirty five. They don't have a line out for me yet. In the post it's two.

You're you're getting your lines from the New York Post.

No, no, today, I am, because I'm good. I just pulled in my I'm still sitting in my car, Okay, and I can't. I can't go into my gamble in sight while I talk to you guys. I'm sure I probably can, but I don't know how to do it.

That's true.

I want to. I want to two units on the Celtics tonight, two units on the Lakers tomorrow night, and two units on the over in the Golden State game. I think that game's probably Saturday, Saturday night.

Okay, you want the Lakers spread or straight out Larry.

Spread minus the four and a half. I think it is, yeah, yeah, And then what is that the guy from Alabama the quarterback for he for going number one.

Like astronomical minus two thousand or something.

Okay, then I'm silly. I'm not betting that.

But you don't bet the NFL Draft.

I don't want to. But I think he's in. I think he's a lock number one.

Well that's what.

Then I'm there in two thousand, one hundred, I know.

But that that you're not going down on it, pussy.

I'm not doing I got those three bets down two units each.

That's good.

I mean, just listen to what you've got. I need I need m M a fight tonight. So I'm gonna listen to who.

Likes no fuck that I don't.

I don't bet that ship did last week.

I bet boxing for Combat Sports.

Dylan's the one who bets on the ever.

The UFC slash UCF.

The Ezer by Johnny who I'm free, Okay, you're.

A balmer minus one fifty Themos I'm a big fan of them. They're fun to watch.

They're sixteen and eight this year, a lot of.

Fun to watch. White Sox plus one thirty against the Rays. The Rays gotta fucking lose sometime, so I'm taking the plus money twenty and five, and then I got the Rangers. Heiney plus one forty against a Yanks tonight, which I'm very excited about. We're going to boat race the Yanks and then the NFL Draft. All right, I like number three overall, mister Tyree, I like Will Levis, number four overall.

We go down.

Okay, So when you bet, you're not betting teams, you bet where they'll be drafted.

Yeah, what the number? Yeah, that's what I did today.

Okay, So Wilson's gonna go number three, no matter who that is, no matter, no matter, Will Levis go four, Will Anderson goes five, Anthony Richardson doesn't go before the eighth pick, and the Cowboys are taking b Shawn Robinson.

That would be so fucking good, Danny God, I would love that.

They're gonna use him like a Christian McCaffrey or a d Debo sitting. That's what they're gonna have to know. He's got hands, he's got balance, got speed. It's like you listened to my show, Hey Dylan, Hey, then yeah yeah, now you gotta do podcasts. You don't need me anymore. Yeah, you don't need to call in. Okay, what do you ask for me?

Got some golf there? The Mexico Open already underway, but I'm taking Gary Woodland to win.

Wait a minute, Wait a minute, already underway, teed off. When did you send the bets.

In earlier today before they teed off?

Do we have confirmation?

Now we cleared that it's good, he's good. Let me go to the judges.

Judges say, ray can't confirm?

Okay, I trust ye.

John ram is in Tiger Woods territory.

Yeah, it's crazy.

Like the odds last time you had these kind of odds were Tiger Woods ods.

I think he was plus two seven.

That was twenty fourteen Farmers Insurance Open plus Tiger was plus two hundred. Noh shit. John ram is at plus two seventy five to win, to win.

Which is crazy too. If you think about like the Master, there's like rom and Scotty were both like plus nine hundred and then it's like it just falls off after that.

Uh, so you got uh. I got Gary Gary Woodland of course to.

Win plus two twenty five hundred.

Wow.

I'm actually putting one unit on that, and then one unit on Tony fen Ow to win plus seven fifty, and then two units on Gary Woodland top ten plus two forty.

Yeah, really hammering Gary Woodland.

Yeah, your bed.

In there, bloo bloopoo anything else that you have? You have the z er by Johnny, of.

Course I do Dan okay, formula Oh, Sergio Perez to win the By John Grand Prix plus.

Where's Max Verse stopping?

He's in there, don't worry, okay. And I'm taking Max for staff and fastest lap plus one hundred almost even.

Money anything on the draft.

Yes, I don't, Larry, you're still there.

Laughing. I'm just listening to the Okay.

I'm going Will Anderson first defensive player drafted plus one o five, Jordan Addison first wife.

To come down to either him or Tyree Wilson.

Yeah, okay, I don't know. I think Will Anderson has the name too, what like Alabama?

But that isn't like you don't say, well, he's got the name, We're going to take him over Tyree Wilson.

But everyone's been all over him for forever. Okay, all right, they're also pretty much the same odds, I think more or less.

Here we go. What else?

Jordan Addison, first wide receiver drafted plus fourteen hundred. That was a long shot, but I'm taking.

You know who I love? Is z a Flower?

Really?

Out of BC?

He's gotten he think he was. He was second odds wise, I.

Like him a lot, but I don't want to influence you guys. Okay, So Jordan Addison out of USC, formerly out of pit. Yeah, and he is the first wide receiver drafted, no chance, all right.

We probably not.

What else do you have?

CJ. Stroud to go fourth overall plus two hundred, irregardless of team, and then Jalen Carter to go fifth overall minus one ten?

Who do you think leaked that he did poorly on that test? That S two test that they give quarterbacks. He got an eighteen, My man.

And he came out he said he was like, I'm not here to take tests.

Right and here to play school. Bryce Young got ninety eight eighteen ninety eight. Yes, yes, it's on a one zero to one hundred.

Yeah, Lord Jesus, that's hard to do.

What was your did you take the act?

Oh? Yeah, what'd you get? Like a thirty something?

Well you're a smart guy, Yeah, you can be smart.

I had to.

They wouldn't let us graduate high school without taking it. I was at military school, and that made us. I got like a thirty two or something like that.

I take both.

What did you get on the Act?

A thirty?

Bad Larry?

Yeah, I don't think I ever took him. Did they have back then there?

Yes, yes, yes they had act back then.

I don't remember them. I don't. I don't know.

I did better on the SAT too.

I killed the say I did horrible on the Act?

What'd you get eighteen?

I got fourteen?

No? You fucking didn't, I swear to God, Yeah, what the fuck happened to you? I was on acid the night before. I'm not kidding. We dropped acid the night before the act.

I think I got a fourteen, and then I took it again and got an eighteen. Lord, I got a jump shot, mother. I never said that I was smart. I was just good looking.

Dipshits in high school got like a fifteen sixteen?

Well, hello, that would be made.

But they didn't have a jump shot.

I know. Yeah, so I I that was bad. That that was bad.

You know you had to get eighteen just to graduate high school. No, at my school, graduate to graduate eighteen to get into college. They wouldn't give you a diploma if you didn't get eighteen.

No, ship's christ.

What if like a school was like, hey, we'll take you.

It doesn't matter. You're not getting a fucking diploma at my military school without getting eighteen. Yeah.

By the way, I have played basketball against bad Larry where Oh yeah, yeah, we played in a friend of ours driveway and bad Larry can play.

How tall are you, Larry?

Six? Building? Out of the build?

Yeah no, no, you can jump out of a building if you're on the third floor.

I think you can jump out of the building if you get pushed out.

Yeah, yeah, you're not Larry. Just be honest. Okay, I'm I was saying you could play and now, don't shit these people. Okay, you got some nice moves and you can shoot a little bit.

I won't. I was probably, uh, when do we play that? Thirty years ago?

Dan?

I have no idea.

All I was forty then. Oh I know is twenty five years ago.

I was older than you guys. And I walked off like Larry Bird at the three point shooting the.

Rain.

After that weak falcohol.

Years ago.

He's bringing this shoot out. Remember, Okay, we played and I had a low top converse with no socks on because I went over to pick up my daughter. Weren't even going to play. These two guys are out in the yard. One guy played at Providence in the Big East, and they're shooting and and you know, the guy went to Providence, can't shoot. And we started playing and I was gassed, and I kept leaving this guy open. Just

He wouldn't have called it back a day in Dayton. It just wouldn't have been called. But it was like twenty nineteen nineteen. We're playing one on one to three, the three of us. Yeah, and he called that foul. So then, of course, you know, I was just getting a no home. I don't want to would like him going to his next show with like a big black eye. So I let him shoot.

Oh oh wow, oh oh you let me shoot? Huh you must have let me shoot a shitload because I made them all. I was like, I was so mad at this guy, John Nolan. I'd be like, just make the shot, jihnt And he couldn't write right, Larry.

It was it was a battle for sure. I remember we didn't want to play again.

Oh I couldn't play.

I'm admit I probably couldn't again either. It was like it was fun though. I just heard that Shave dropped acid before he took those ACT tests. Yeah, can I changed my over under on him?

Acid makes you live long.

He's come a long way since then.

Please.

I dropped acid two weeks ago.

Dylan, what else do you have? Any other ones? You got? C? J. Stroud fourth overall?

Yeah?

And uh Jalen Carter fifth overall?

Okay?

And uh Dan our Sea Dragons money line against the Defenders plus one forty five?

What are you doing?

You?

Two units on that? Tell you love the Sea Dragons?

I love Italy, Danny, Yeah yeah, Italian full of great people.

Yeah they are?

Yeah? Yeah?

Without papers got back from Sicily.

Yeah, how was that?

Yeah?

That was wonderful?

Did they have indoor plumbing?

What is just outhouses?

What is going on with you everywhere? So are the Irish?

Thank God that God for that built this country, Danny. There's a lot of people built this entry. Yeah, there are a lot of people. Don't get credit for building this country? Yeah for free?

Whoa yeah as Marvin as Marvin joining us says yes, yes, uh, Larry anything any you know, parting words anything?

I just want to I said, I haven't been paying too much attention to gambling wise? What did the Jets line go crazy for? F they signed Aaron Rodgers like they're over under for the wins for the year? That yet?

No, because this trade was in the works for a long time. I think it. I think they're over under. His nine nine and a.

Half may have bumped them by like a game once.

It was no, no, no, no, no. It's been pretty steady nine and a half.

What's to do with the New York media.

It's the New York media is not the way it used to be.

They're going to hammer him. They are not, Yes, they will now. The Post is going to beat his ask.

Social media is what roughs you up?

But he's nowhere near that.

You know, I don't think he gives it at this point. Does he really care?

Like he's gonna get rattled. I'm telling you he's gonna get rattled and it's gonna be great.

They don't care. He's your old tennis players, fucking Will.

He's gonna date some.

Sick Actually, I was gonna propose, who do you think which in New York?

So she's gonna start dating? Just think?

I think that would be a power fucking move.

Tom Brady comes back after Jersey. Yeah, yeah, hey goat.

Oh yes, Ray, he's currently seeing Mallory Eden. Eden's you've seen her own.

She's a billionaire too.

Oh yeah, it's a smoke show. But is she happy? Cares?

Is she going to move to New York with I'm sure she wants she wants to be famous? Yes, Ray, I take that back.

I just got another update, Shay. This doesn't look good for you. Will Anderson is now minus three point fifty to be the Texans number two overall pair.

Fucking dammit, that's right. I thought you had a hunts on him living your technology.

Your test results came back.

Just talked to your your roommate, she said, to take the under. So Larry, you're you're good, uh and and we'll talk to you next week.

I'm good, Shandyllen, good luck, and I hope we all see a hundred.

I won't now, you know what, I don't even want to. These guys would be happy if they saw you.

Yeah soon, guys.

Did you did you say? Shrooms?

Those two shrooms? All right? Shay's ears perked up. But Larry, we're going to fix this thing. And if you don't come soon, Shane and I are just going to kill ourselves and we win.

Yeah, think about that.

No, no, I actually thought about it today. But I guess to do tonight.

About killing yourself.

I was. I was at RK Airport. I could have gone. I could have got the Milford Airport again.

What airport?

Nork.

Okay, you're not coming up here, and you know that, and you keep saying that and it's soft on your part.

Okay, I can care.

Soon I will be there, Dan, Okay, over under.

I'm just walk into the house right now and just tell him me. Don't plan anything for next Thursday. Why do you just do that Thursday? You're going to take the week off. Like the last time I planned to come up he took the week off.

How convenient? Oh nice, try Larry. Why didn't you go ask mommy if you're allowed out of that? Hey, mommy, can I can I go?

Dan?

People like to spend time with men.

That I don't believe it. Have ever put your Budweiser in a sippy cup? Again?

Thanks for joining us. By the way, Shane Irving podcast available wherever you get your podcast. And you get more of this whatever this is, you get more of this in then.

Some oh a lot more than some. Nobody bleeps me out, Well, I have to talk about Italians.

The episode is three hours.

On the time history of Italy.

How about we say goodbye and once again Shane an Irving podcast wherever you get your podcasts. Have a great weeknd everybody enjoyed the draft and talk to you next Thursday.