Episode 129: Throuple

Gambling was something that I did.

This is Dan Patrick takes a gamble.

One of my bookies died at the kitchen table.

The podcast vehicle for Dan to talk about his love of gambling.

One bet, another bet, another bet.

Without doing the actual gambling.

You're a coward.

It's easy to have a scapegoat and now joined by Bad Larry, Shayne Irving, and Dylan the graphics guy. I have friends.

Here's Dan Patrick.

Look who's here?

Got a full lineup? Everybody's on time. I got Shay here, Dylan here, Ray's here, Marvin and bad Larry is joining us again. How about a round of a fawn right one.

It's nice being back in the little room. I feel a little more intimate.

Totally agree.

Yeah, instead of being out there where the man are.

I don't like it.

The men are out there and the Dan.

It's way way too much testiculate out there.

Boys in here.

Yeah, yeah, keep it more feminine in here.

I did. I did an RSVP Larry's daughter's wedding.

We'll see you there. Yeah. Are you gonna go?

Yeah?

Three of us are going. Yeah.

Okay, so Larry, I uh, I didn't put down plus one. I'm putting down plus three.

Plus plus three.

Yeah, is that okay?

Then you can come for the happy hour for sure. I work a limit. Okay, they won't even the happy hour people, I mean cocktail hour.

Really, you're gonna turn down a gay threle from your wedding. Imagine if.

Four don't get canceled Larry thropple Ale, that'd be three and that's a couple.

Oh he knows.

Oh yeah, he's more of a Quinn tuple guy.

Wow.

Uh let me see, let me recap here. So we're talking football units here. Dylan lost the unit, Shay lost the unit. Bad Larry no show nothing. It would zero smartest.

It would be interesting that if Larry just took the strategy of not placing a single football bet this whole season, and see if he comes out.

On twenty units again.

Yeah, but non football bad. Larry is up plus twenty two. SHA's plus four. Dylan is minus twelve and a half. I didn't take long for the first bad beat of the year. Dylan bet on New Mexico plus three seventy to upset Montana. That was Montana State, wasn't it, Yes, it was it. Yeah, it was Montana's Montana State. I believe because they're one of the top five FBS schools or whatever fcf fcs F you all.

The good ones are up there in the nether region of Montana and the Dakota.

So New Mexico pays Montana State three hundred and sixty thousand dollars to play the game only to lose at home.

Sounds like me betting in a heartbreaker too.

So let me see I got you at thirty one future bets.

Shay, Yeah, oh my god, that's right.

Okay, let me see anything I need to recap. Anybody want to recap anything from last week? Bad Larry? Do you want to recap anything?

I don't.

I don't even remember what I did last week. I think I was two and two the baseball and I don't. I don't remember. I'm my wife's got to get a new job, Dan. She thinks she's my boss. I think I put I put together like five lamps this morning. I thought I worked for Nike in like a sweatshop. Wow. She sent me to the dump to get rid of the cardboard that around every day at the house. It's like unbelievable.

Are these are these lamps for the wedding?

Reception.

No these lamps because I don't know the two lamps in the upstairs bedrooms. So the four four lamps upstairs and the two bedrooms that we've never turned on. I guess we're just old and uh.

Not the thing you haven't turned on?

Dan, Dan, how often do you replaced the rugs under beds? I don't even know what color they are, and I just replaced them this morning? What oh Att yelled at the Nike. My supervisor came back out.

Is there a steam whistle in the back break?

Is over door?

I just I just walked around the back porch. I just said, she goes, I don't like your complaining in a public form. Then then there's not one. There's no space on any of the walls in my house. And she has like ten new pictures she wants me to hang. I said, Marreth, you can hang them, just take something down and put the new one up. But I'm not putting any more holes in any walls because there's no room. It's it's ridiculous.

Well but what are the pictures of that are up there?

They're beautiful.

I mean, just leave it the way it is, Just say you did it and hide the other pictures, and if there's that much ship on the wall, it'll just blend in.

I can't imagine. Well, she I she got to get a job, got too much free time. I'm not gonna let her.

You could also get a job, and you're not there to get asked to do all this.

You know what, it might be worth it. This morning, I'm dripping sweat and I got I got my pixel. I'm all good.

Raise might be looking for a hot little cocktail waitress.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, a little beef beef.

Yeah, Larry, I didn't even go to I didn't even go to Raise today, and we got We're going a happy hour three o'clock. I'm not going to make rays today.

Wow. Yeah, it's pretty big.

Yeah, they'll be doing a welfare check.

Wait, happy happy hour at three. Yeah, it's moving up.

That's already.

Time's moving up.

Yeah, it's just it's just going to a bar three.

I don't that's an early start for me. I'm usually not.

Oh, I know that I've known you.

I've known you for over twenty years, twenty.

Five years, which is crazy in itself.

But I don't really know Larry like I know Larry, but I don't know, Larry, but.

You know that like unicorns are a thing, but you don't actually do you.

Know what his birthday is? No? Yeah, middle name, no religion, no cut her cut on the show here, you're Catholic?

Yes, okay, all right, Larry.

What's your blood type?

I don't know that.

I think it's blood.

Barbecue, it's bloodweiser MSG bloop bloop.

Okay, Dylan, you want to recap anything other than you lost New Mexico against Montana State.

That was tough, and I do I don't want to call out our friend here Dan, Sammy P.

Sammy P.

You know what, fuck Sammy P. There we go talks a great game. Now we're talking. Yeah, let it rip because I'm pissed a Kentucky basketball during the tournament. I told so many people, I mean like he was convincing. You know. I got a sharp who told me. I'm telling everybody they fade the Texans this year. I got a sharp telling me to fade the Texans.

Imagine if the Texans just win the.

I'll apologize.

But so we we got a text from Sammy p uh you know, early in the fourth quarter of the New Mexico game saying, holy shit, it's looking good for New Mexico. And see right then and there.

Should know this is a guy who's a professional. He's got his own gambling show.

That's day one ship. Yeah, I'm disappointed. Did you by the way, did you make your pick super Bowl pick yet? Okay, we have to get the odds of that at second? He does it? I gt that every year?

What what are the what's the show that Sammy P's on?

He's a bet lab HQ or some ship that's a new one, yeah, a new one with Joe. Oh.

Okay, we need to we need to at least give him publicity, even though he screwed us. He did a couple of times. Here you got so how do you want to do this? You guys got futures here, we got stuff that's coming up though.

So these futures were from last week. They're just still They're obviously not dead yet.

Okay.

One other thing though, Dan, just because I thought it was interesting, Delaware State covered that forty am.

I love that.

Yeah, yep, the hornets I think from Delaware Sticky so bets this week, Dylan, you want to go first?

Sure?

Dan? I am so excited. Cry football. It is the highlight of the entire slate. What is the over under forty one? Dan, Okay, that's like in dog that's like dog years. That's massive. Though Kirk Farrence, suspended for the first.

Game, noted bad boy.

Kirk Farrins noted bad boy and noted hater of throwing the football in scoring points.

And his son got fired. Yeah, it's the offensive cordate by his dad.

That's a rough day, all right, Dan. Two units on Iowa Illinois State under forty one.

I have.

I have a system I have to stick with, all right. I'm also going to put a unit on Iowa and Illinois State alternate under thirty one that I just still think they just can't get over that. Yeah, and no plus there tonight, I'm going Buffalo minus three and a half agans Lafayette. I've been to Lafayette. Those guys don't play football, especially against Buffalo.

I've been to lat too.

It's a nice school. The town's a little Nay.

I don't know what that has to do with the game, but okay, it has to do everything.

Oh it does.

Okay, West Virginia plus eight against Penn State. I'm he's going to be.

So I'm fascinated by this game, like because I've been bird dogging Ohio State coming to Penn State this year. I think that the front seven for Ohio State is not who they tell us they are. And I think the Penn State is a real chance at night, okay, to win that game. It'll be a white out, Yes it will. I know Ohio State doesn't care about that. They fuck him up every white out. But I think if Penn State loses this week, I could get plus

Violent, you could get fucked.

Shay.

What if they blow the doors off West Virginia.

I won't like that. I won't. That'll upset hold On ray Hans something to say.

Penn State is plus four right now against Ohio State. I need Penn State rip Ohio State four against Penn State.

What else do you have here? So you got West Virginia plus eight against Penn State.

Yes, and Clemson plus thirteen a half against Jologia.

Wow, Damn, that's a lot of that's.

A lot it is for Clemson too. I don't it's funky, but I don't.

Know Dabo's gonna pray about it. We're gonna be good. Yeah, exactly that way.

I've converted recently.

Put there in the w A column.

Motherfucker Devo. I got Purdue minus thirty two and a half against Indiana State. All right, Nevada money line against Troy plus two thirty five, Dan, as you will call, I have a personal vendeticast.

Troy's bad this year. Troy's bad this year.

Nevada should have fucking beat SMU last weekend. I've bet that game and it was a heartbreaker. Okay, Uh, Fresno State plus twenty one against Michigan again, I'll take the points. I have Fresno State to win the Mountain West, and I just don't think Michigan. I think Michigan's got too much shit going on circling around them.

Okay, Okay, And.

This is an interesting one, Dan, I found something a fun fact today. So I'm taking Lamar and Texas State over sixty and a half. Wasn't familiar with Lamar, but they have a very notable alumnus, Janis Joplin.

Oh, she graduated from college.

I didn't.

I don't think graduate.

I was gonna say she's more accomplished than I am. That's pretty fucking yeah. Needle in her arm?

And then you go to Texas. Didn't you go to Texas State for three minutes?

Or was it no, North Texas, North tex couple minutes? Did you say she went to Lamar or to Lamar?

Oh?

Yeah, okay, so you're taking Lamar?

No, I'm taking the over Oh just and because Texas State has a a uh, top twenty offense and bottom hundred defense and the last time they played, which is actually like twenty eleven or something.

What does Janis Joplin have to do with this bench?

I just thought it was well. I looked up Lamar because there's like I neven fucking heard of this place. And then she popped up as notable alumni or you know, part timers.

Jimmy Johnson went to high school with her? No shit, Yeah wait, JJ went to high school with JJ and they both became famous. Yeah. Do you think they fucked?

It's entirely possible.

I don't think if they did, would their kid be quad Jay but triples? J JA cubed Jimmy Johnson. Janis Joplin had a baby. Baby's name is what it's got to be a Jay doesn't have to be. It has to be. Yeah, Jeremiah Jeremiah Johnson Junior the third.

Gott or you go, Jimmy Janis Joplin if it's a boy, or Janis Jimmy.

Joplin Arkansas Jimmy Janis Joplin the third and Jerry Jones JJ.

Yeah, we have to find out.

And Jerry said, don't forget about me?

What else do you Yeah, you can't forget about Jerry. He won't let you forget about it.

You guys, you're a good stupid No one could be a How do you assign CD for that money? And then don't sign Dack? How do you do because he's sixty one next year? Million per like? Period? Yeah, fucking period?

I know?

All right? What else do you you got l s U?

I got l C minus four against USC.

Wow.

Yeah, okay, don't believe in USC, but that does scare me. Af feel like a lot of people are.

Gonna be on l C the whole country right now. Anything.

Then we ride together and I got one US Open but Dan my guy, carls Alchaaz, I don't think has failed me yet to win the US Open plus two ten.

All right, that U means we bring in bad Larry, bad Larry. You're ready to go.

You gotta hear guys. Okay, damn, I don't understand why you let Dylan go first. I'm the leader in the clubhouse, and we go. I thought it would all be I would all be.

Tied to Larry.

Just unbelievable that it would all be even today.

Who's the defending champ.

He won the playoffs, I'm the defending regular season that yeah, oh you go back and look that up. I was leading going into the playoffs and I shortened to Kansas City. But that's okay, Okay, just go there.

You seem like you need a win today, so I'll let you have that.

No, no, no, that's good.

You're minus one for the year already. I'm it's it's like the golf tournham. I'm starting plus strokes. I got Yukon plus twenty against Maryland JMU, minus the nine and a half against Charlotte. I'm on West Virginia also. I think they might beat Penn State. But West Virginia plus the eight against Penn State. This is a silly one, but I want a little Akron money. Forty eight and a half against Fact just have one quarter where they

Larry, are you done?

I'm not. Yeah, I'm done with my picks. I'm not too confident yet. It's too early to know anything about these college football teams. So we'll just six bets. We'll see what happens.

I'd like to point out that if you are listening to this, I would probably take USC plus four and ben State minus eight.

Now money poorly that shit? Yeah, all right, shit, all right? Danny? Are you okay that you went third? I mean I don't give two ships, Danny, all right, okay, Light the mullet himself laying nine and a half. This is for two units. I love them this year a lot.

And their quarterback has been playing there for a little while.

He's thirty two, and that's fine. What's his name? Bowman. Yeah, bo may any ginger no exact a ginger half. Yeah, he's not a real Ginger. They had a real ginger Brandon fuck oh yeah that was Cowboy Superstar. Then I got Virginia Tech laying thirteen and a half against the nerds and b vandy Al's plus forty two and a half against the cousin fuckers.

I don't know if we do then I think it's called Oklahoma.

Okay sacks state plus three against the didn't you go sack state last year? I did. I like a little sack state in my life. How is the state of your sack? The state of my sack is full? Danny full and cursed with three daughters. Yeah, you imagine if I had a son. I was on my podcast last night, Danny talking shit because somebody emailed and they were like, it's so hard being a dad and I had to watch all my kids, and I was like, this shit ain't hard. It ain't hard. Being a dad is not hard.

No you can, yeah, you would, no, because look at what happened to you.

Well, yeah, they beat my eyes and look how good I'm.

Doing depends how much you're taking the nature versus nurture side of things.

Yeah.

Plus they don't mind going into their rooms. Girls are boys girls. Yeah, it's fine, it's awesome. No, they got everything they needed there. No, I don't do any of that technology ship, Danny. You don't get no iPad in the house. Absolutely, they have a phone?

No fuck no, yeah, right, they get one. They don't have an eye watch. The eldest asked me when do I get an eye watch? Because their friends and shake out that. I said, when you're in fucking college, give a ship.

I hope you get left out of stuffing tough enough, Uh, Danny, we got a little sidebar action. I finally got you.

Still working on having a sun Yeah, I'm working on it. This didn't mean to get too personal there, pull your pants back up, Larry Hey.

I got Jackson State plus seven and a half against ULM. They are bad this year. I got the Cocaine Cowboys laying two and a half against the Gators, and I got the white boys in North Dakota plus nine and a half against Colorado. This is gonna be good, Danny.

Dion's got the large cross around.

I understand that. I understand that you're gonna go against it. The Bible also says a lot about false idols and how not too praise though. There's no crosses in my house? Danny, has you been there? You see across in the wall anywhere? I didn't look see across around my neck? Uh no, you see anything? No no crosses?

Okay, false ize one iron cross?

Okay? All right, right sidebar, Danny, Uh Larry, take note, Sarah tooga race one?

Wait?

Did it friend? Last week? Uh? No? Bell terrible?

You Dan? It was a twenty dollars horse on the top. I don't mind the bet at all.

Yeah, exactly, okay, but you so you guarant you were saying bet it? This was see this is what is the guarantee. I did not say guarante. You you were telling everybody to bet it. Make sure you bet it. Hey, Beatty loves a pony.

Now the problem is when you really are confident, I lose run right?

Yeah? Yeah, just saying anyway, trifecta one five seven. That's race one daily double. We got three five seven leg one seven on the leg two and I love the three to show Larry, where are we that where Saratoga Baby thirty minutes to post yep, I'll be all over one five to seven hit that all right?

Say?

I have North Dakota State plus nine and a half against Dion Oh.

Yeah, u Mass laying two and a half against EMU. And then for the capitalists out there, I got baseball still Los t Grays laying one sixty against the Angels of Anaheim. Brew Crew won thirty five against the communists and then the other communists north of the border plus one twenty the Blue against.

The Races, red Sons. Yeah, the Races, the red Son most racist town I've ever been to my life, the Red so Boston is the most racist.

Town of every They have somewhat of a reputation.

It's so racist, is insane, and I'm from the set.

I think it seems more like that. It's in the north.

It's crazy. They are violent.

Shay and Irving podcast.

I don't think Whitey Bulger was with the Times.

No, I don't think Whitey Bulger was really into busting, and that's Joe Biden. Whitey Bulger and Joe Biden were on the same side of busting. Just put that in your fucking Wikipedia page. We're not We're not doing politics on the show. We should. You see, Trump is fifty percent to forty nine percent chance of winning right now Pauly Market over seven hundred and fifty million dollars.

Bet Danny, Okay, what's thet one wonderbout there?

You're betting on Trump to win?

I bet Trump and free Roland. I bet Trump and Kamala. It's Kamala Kamela. It's Kamela. I think it's Kamala comal Kamala. It's like my law.

It's like Kamala Camelo, like Camala.

Kamala. Kamala is the pro wrestler, communist sympathizer Dan Patrick. It's like Camelot. It's like sunshine and happiness. No, I'm just trying to help you pronounce it anyway. She was up, he was. There's been wild movements, so I'm pre rolling.

They're both minus one ten right now to win outright, we.

Should bet on if they'll be political violence, Well, they'll be they'll be chaos either way if anybody wins, well, I don't, Yes, Marvin. Are we going to do the show the day after election day? Should election?

Yeah?

Watch the results.

You can bet on each state's results, so we can have like the map and go through each one.

We can do a map like a Karnacky map. We should do our own map, a dj in map. You guys want to do it. You guys can't, like I can't. Why not? No politics, please, it's no fun.

Nobody wins four nobody, nobody wins, nobody wins somebody no. No. When you argue, it's boring.

Oh no, I'm talking about putting money on pot. Argue. Well, I don't gamble. Remember I don't gamble. I gamble on this podcast, we're still giving off the side.

I don't gamble.

I did gamble America. He gambles.

I know I don't, And I look at you and that's why I don't. Every time I see you, I go yep.

Not gambling. Who wants to get a powerball ticket after this?

Good luck?

Ray Will Dylan will?

Yes?

Yes, right, So I was looking at the Trump odds. They also have odds on when he would get divorced by year twenty twenty four, twenty five, twenty twenty six, and not.

Before twenty seven. We don't know the prenup.

I'm just saying. But it also wouldn't happen if if he got elected he won, happened during.

If he doesn't win, I'd say twenty twenty five.

Yeah, because he's gonna be standing. He's gonna if he doesn't win, he stands to lose a ship ton of money jail. Yes, well yeah, and just like all these civil case and stuff.

We always talk about. Aaron Judge bet on himself for Dak Prescott, Trump's betting on ultimate BET's.

Kind of.

Yah, this is all or nothing. But yeah, I don't know if Malania is around for the ride.

Poor Malania, Poor poor Malania, such a great soul, the real first lady that this country. You're kind of first lady. Yeah, yeah, I took her pass for it. Where you going.

Given her history?

Yeah, I don't know what means?

Yeah, no speaking yet, Okay.

Shay and Irving wherever you get your podcast? He talks politics? Yeah, and bat Larry. Anything else I need to know or the nation needs to know about you?

No, I'm gonna go bet Saratoga right now, one three five.

You said, yeah, one three five and one three seven of them No, no, no this one one five seven, one five seven, And I got three to show just in case.

I got to get back to work by guys.

Okay, look bad Larry doing lampshades and carpet that.

The Nike lampshade factory. I didn't know that was.

Yeah, but see this is his daughter's getting married in October, and his wife has got to get the house ready for people coming by.

We're all actually going to go, right, that's not.

That wedding.

Well, I am going, but the wedding itself is at two in the afternoon on Friday on Friday, and the reception starts at five point thirty. So I get out of here, head down on Friday a couple hours, then go to the reception.

Carpool. I mean, I don't need to.

It's not a need thing. It's a desire to spend.

Time because I know you guys will be drinking. Can I smoke in your car? Smoke?

What?

Cigarettes?

No?

Why not?

What?

You're going to smoke?

Cigar?

Their American spirits? Oh yeah, don't be racist.

I can definitely kind of like cigarettes.

Native Americans, Danny, they make him. They rolling themselves.

You know that.

Okay.

I did a podcast called Running Smoke that was all about a guy with cigarettes in Canada who was Native American.

Okay, let's honor his legacy. And you're smoking the vehicle. I don't know why this is, but I don't like.

You being in this like this tutorial mode of yours. You're going to teach us, teach you all about a lot of things.

No, you can't.

It's called progressive, it's called I fucked up. Let me tell you about it.

What about the boys with cigars? No, you never smoked a cigar in your car?

No?

Why? Because I can smoke a cigar elsewhere.

I don't need to cruising around And.

No, it's trying to wrap it up.

Wait, what if we don't smoke anything in the car.

No, I don't know. I don't want you guys in the car. All right? How many?

How many times I need to say we'll take Amtrak? Yes, take take a sella, take something. I don't give a ship what you say? Okay, that's uh, that's Dan Patrick takes a gamble once again. Not always safe for work around the kids, And uh, I should have said that. At the beginning of this podcast.

That was pretty PG no no relatively speaking.

Now, we started out with the thrupple, I think, and then that's tough to explain. Somebody's got to explain that. The little timmy, who's going, what's a thrupple?

Dad?

Ask your mom? Yeah, okay, okay, that's it. We've done it. We've done enough. Thanks for joining us. We're going to try to do it better next week. Thanks for joining us. On Dan Patrick Takes Again.