Episode 111: I Grew Up A Man

Gambling was something that I did.

This is Dan Patrick takes a gamble.

One of my bookies died at the kitchen table.

A podcast vehicle for Dan to talk about his love of gambling.

One bet, another bet, another bet.

Without doing the actual gambling.

You're a coward.

It's easy to have a scapegoat.

And now join my Bad Larry, Shayan Irving, and Dylan the graphics guy.

I have friends.

Here's Dan Patrick.

All righty, here we go. It's another week and a lot to recap. We have Dylan the graphics guy. We have Pa Ray, we have Marvin, we have Shyan Irving and Bad Larry joining us from the Jersey Shore.

No, no, Dan, I'm on. I'm on ninety one on my way to Maine. And now that the two girls are going at the pull over, I can't talk to you. Hang on, was that.

Next girl she there here?

Yet? Tell her?

I said a lot?

Yeah?

She drive?

Yeah?

Why why didn't you stop? In?

The more she takes, the more that she takes, the better driver, I am.

I'm sure. I'm sure the cops would totally agree to Wow.

I love her.

Okay, So it's your wife and her sister, correct and your guys are driving.

To mein heading up to Kate Elizabeth.

Yes, why didn't you stop in?

I'm an hour beyond you, guys, and I thought about it to surprise, and then, you know, girls didn't want to kill an hour and then kill another half hour on a show. So it's it's Easter week, Dan, I gotta get up there for a happy hour.

Well you could have started here if i'm I'm surveying the landscape here in our podcast room, and it looks like there might be some beverages in here.

We even bought beer for you there.

Yeah, we have beer. Yeah, beer in here. Uh, there's some men drinking, well, guys drinking white claw in here.

Dudes.

Oh, young, you're not a dude if you're drinking a white claw?

What move? What's with the white class slander it?

I don't know. I just I grew up a man. Don't assume man like I apologize. By the way, drinking anything sounds like figure in your life? I do.

He's just gay.

By the way, you know who Dylan looks like Ron Jeremy gotten that okay?

Kind of?

But the is it Sam Bankman Freed? Oh yeah, the bitcoin guy?

Yeah, I think a rabbi.

If he had a sash.

Yes, I think you're gonna get him like fifty years.

Yeah, they're going there. They're throwing the book at him and probably his rabbi too. Honestly, does that?

Does that? Can you see some picture?

Day Ray just brought up of all the like Pablo Escobar and Ron Jeremy and all the comparisons I've gotten that Sam Bankman Freed might be the most defensive one.

Now, are those people who got all that money? Are they subjected to uh pen Like, what do you mean he stole a.

Bunch Larry and Tom Brady.

Tom Brady got forty five million dollars? Oh yeah, I mean the advertisements and ship Well they paid him as a spokesperson.

Man, I don't think, but I feel like they're that would probably be easy to get off in court.

But do they have to pay that back?

No way, I don't know. I don't think so. I mean because they pay I mean assume you're like there was any other company and you're a spokesporst from them, they're paying you. You don't know that behind the scenes necessarily they're just fucking stealing money.

Oka like a pro better than anybody's ever done it. Well for a little bit better than Bernie Bernie Madoff. He beat the ship out of Bernie Madoff. And how much he stole? Yeah, Idy, Yeah, he's stole way more than Bernie.

Okay, nobody made money on this show. Well, no, you know Bad Larry five and five and a half. Oh, here we go, Bad Larry plus five and a half, Dylan minus sixteen, Shay minus seven. That's uh, that's on on the uh on the year. Yeah yeah, Uh, Larry lost two units, Dylan one one, and Chay lost three.

Uh.

Let me see recapping Bad Larry. Anything you want to recap, You usually bitch and moan about something I think.

I want, like four and four, five and five. I don't have it in front of me, and I'm driving Dan and I'm getting the evil eye from two women right now. Okay, they want me to They want me to pull over and do this, and I just don't want to, don't want to stop.

Well, you can pull over, hey, you do you guys like bluetooth in your car, Larry, can you fucking talk and drive it away?

But I don't want these I don't want to the women hearing you, guys, talk. Oh yeah, yeah, speakerphone, but you know, say sometimes goes off the round. I don't want the women, no one hearing.

That blaming me.

As long as they don't bring up Jeron Powell to'll be fine, Yeah.

Jerome pal Janet yelling, don't bring up the federal government, will be just fine.

Larry, by the way, I told you to take Grand Canyon against Saint Mary's. I don't think anybody listened to me.

I got fucking smoked.

Hen uh shay, anything to recap.

Here fucking favorites for fifteen and one straight up, Danny Books lost.

I lost.

Sounds like I'm a sharp better. Thank you very much.

You did give us Sammy P. In Kentucky.

You should have seen the vitriol on the twitter, Danny, I got murdered. A lot of people hating on me.

Ohen you give people bad information, they're gonna come out.

And why I do that all the time? I know.

But yeah, Sammy P from Chicken Dinner, Winter Winter Chicken Dinner, he got killed. He should go hungry.

Yeah yeah. And Jack Golkie lunch, Yes.

He said, Oh I like Kentucky Final four.

He did say to be fair, he did say there they play his own that Kentucky's never seen, so they're gonna give him some fits, like he didn't take him in the spread. He didn't do an shit. But of course I blocked that out and.

They still should have won the game.

Hell yeah, they should. I mean they're talking about losing cal Or.

Did anyone know that Oakland was in Michigan?

Yes, in commuter school.

Yeah.

I thought. I was thinking he was like Oakland, California. And then the team came out and I was like that does it seemed like that's Oakland.

Oakland barely has high schools, let alone of college. I can't imagine I cover sports for a living.

Dylan makes sense, Well, I don't know. I don't know about you. What do you do for a living? I did too.

I didn't know where fucking Oakland College was. They've been good this season, like in the past.

Yes, and then guy kept his job for forty years? Do you think it's hard to keep a job for five years?

And Ray should know this. Oakland plays Michigan State pretty much every year, right.

Yeah, like almost on a you knew where Oakland was.

I did because my grandfather had a cup of coffee there.

That's about it?

What the fuck a couple?

But why?

How the hell did your grandfather tell you about a cup of coffee?

He was there for there a short amount of time, didn't really stick around there.

You've heard the expression having a no like you called up to the majors.

You know, no no, never heard that?

Okay, uh, Dylan, you uh wow, you're consistently shitty.

I did pretty well actually then well really yeah, well I saw all the fucking Formula one bets screwed me, but maybe won one, eight, eight and five of March madas.

You lost all your Formula one.

Yes, du hast any money line though against by U.

Yeah, you had a final four Parley Nebraska, Purdue, Arizona, Illinois. You were you were there. I gotta give you credit. But that's a loser. Okay, that turns and now we turn our attention to bad Larry. Have you pulled over the side of the road.

I have not done. I'm still barreling towards the Connecticut line. Can you read my morning?

Okay, here we go. Bad Larry has appreciated. Okay, you have the over on Illinois and Iowa state at one forty six and a half. Yep, Okay, so this is offense versus defense, Illinois offense Iowa State defense.

Right, but I know Illinois is gonna be pushing it all all day. I think that's an easy over. My two favorite best of that over there and Marquette tonight or tomorrow night, whenever that'd.

Be tomorrow night. We'll get to that in a moment. Connecticut san Diego State, you have the over at one thirty six, but I think I had bet.

Three overs as I say, life's too short time.

No, no, I'm just you don't have to give me an explanation. I'm just telling you. I'm saying Yukon San Diego State over one thirty six, and then you could say yes, and then I go Clemson Arizona over one fifty two and a half. Yes, okay, all right, san Diego State getting eleven against the Yukon.

Yeah, I think Yukon's going to win the game. But they have to have one game that they're a little worried about. I think this might be it.

Okay, North Carolina minus four and a half against Alabama.

And just how to pick it? Not really happy with that bet.

Yeah, Alabama scores a lot.

I like Bama man.

Uh Friday matchups Creighton Tennessee. You have the over one forty four.

Creighton pushes the ball pretty well. Also, I'm I got Creighton as a Final four team for me.

Okay, and I bet it.

I bet a plus nine hundred of a long time ago. So I need to. I need to. That's tomorrow.

And I also yeah, oh uh, Marquette minus six and a half against NC State. Love that, Okay, Duke plus four against Houston.

Need it needed an underdog.

I'm gonna say that's a yes. Yes, Okay, Okay, Gonzaga plus five and a half against Purdue. I'm trying to help you, Larry.

I know I don't have the seat in front of me, Dan, I said it them this morning.

Okay, Gonzaga plus five. These are questions I'm asking you have Gonzaga plus five and a half versus Due Yeah, Okay, there we go. Uh Shyan irving your turn.

Time for America to shine. Danny March Madness, I guess I'll still bet on it. Zona lane seven and a half against Clemson. Think they get exposed.

Why are you down on March Madness?

Because it sucks for me. It's just painful. It just lose a lot of money every year.

That's the fun part.

It reminds me of bowl season, Like you can have a great year and then bowl season comes around you get fucking murdered, especially now with the transfer portal and all that shit. And same with college basketball. You have a decent year, think you know how to read the fucking market, and then the march madness comes and you just get corn holed violently. Cyclones laying one and a half against Illinois, Bama plus four and a half against the tar Heels. I like this. I like Bama here all right?

So Arizona minus seven and a half against Clemson, Iowa State minus one and a half, Alabama getting four and a half.

Yeah, okay, and now on to God's greatest creation, bad Layer.

Any baseball picks.

No, no, I didn't know that. What are you gonna pick the over runners for the year?

You can pick whatever you want. I'm just curious because you're somebody day is today?

What do you mean, well, we do the show on Thursday. We're going to bet a Friday baseball game or a Thursday baseball game.

Yes, I will, I.

Will be baseball.

But okay, you normally.

I don't have. I don't have. I didn't look at any baseball for the show.

Now that's all you need to just say, thank you.

Wait, wait, actually I did bet the other day over the Mets at eighty and a half or eighty one and a half.

I thought it was seventy something. Am I crazy? I thought it was like seventy eight.

I'm telling you, because eighty one eighty one we win.

I agree it was it was eighty.

It was eighty and a half in the Mets.

Okay, can I bet that over?

I'm gonna want to put that one out on the show.

Okay, how about the A's at fifty seven and a half?

Crude, spicy. I kind of want to take the I might actually take take.

The under over. Okay, all right, so shaye Opening Day, Yeah, Americana. I got the Cardinals plus one ninety against the gambling addicts. I got the raise laying one thirty. I don't know against the Communists, goers says gambling attic.

They got a problem four and a half million.

That is a problem, you would say that.

Yeah, Okay, I got the raise laying one thirty against the Commis.

I got to be the Blue Jays. Their Commies.

Yeah, I got the World champions laying one twenty against the.

I don't want to say cups. I'll just say.

Chicago Red Sox Mariners under seven and a half. Twinkies laying one twenty against the Rolls San franc San Diego over three and a half in the first five. This is an auto beat for me. Auto when you Darvish is on the fucking mound. He loves. I think he's given up more first inning, Yes, yes, loves giving up the dinners.

You first in two bombs in the first inning all day, It's all I mean. And then and then we'll finish like eleven strike.

Exactly, like bang bang, one hundred and sixteen pitches, twelve strikeouts three day, or the first three heads three runs, yeah exactly, and then you're under.

That's three runs instead of three and a half. Don't do Why would you pointed my bad? What I call it? You have some over unders since you thought ahead of time that the season was starting.

I've been looking for Mike Larry yeh.

Okay, the rent Socks under seventy seven and a half. Yep, correct, all right, Astros under ninety four hate them?

Another fucking cheater.

Okay, but are you betting against them because you hate.

That's an emotional betting.

Okay, right, Brewers over eighty and a half wins, undervalued, yep, Phillies over eighty nine and a half. I think they take the East. Okay, ballmore bomber. When's the East?

Yeah?

Plus three hundred Phillies win the East plus two eighty hedge magic coming right, and then you've got even more two units Cardinals to win the Central Cardinals to win the World Series plus three thousand. Then they have like seventy two wins last year.

Yeah, undervalued, underval I hope for your state moves. They make fucking moves mid season. This is a bet on the.

Future Baltimore to win the World Series. Mets to win the World Series, bet plus fifty five hundred Phillies.

You can just auto fatom when it comes to September. You just bet against the fucking Whales. Were two weeks straight.

Phillies to win the World Series plus fifteen hundred and Braves to win the World Series plus four fifty. Yeah, all right, and that brings us to Dylan.

Alrighty Dan, so I got bet on every Sweet sixteen game naturally, Clemson money line against Arizona plus two fifty. Clemson's hot. They look very good actually, and this is I mean, I have Arizona winning at all, So this is a little bit of a hedge. But this is prime time Arizona shit the bad territory. They made it. I'm surprised they made it this far, to be quite frank h San Diego State plus eleven against the Yukon

We did this last year.

We did last year was like the thirty five to one, So we're heading in the right direction.

They won seventy six games last year.

Yeah, okay, God to be double that.

Oh wow, that'd be a lot.

Uh.

And then actually I like this a lot. Mariners to win the al West plus eighty five.

Pretty tough sledding in the Ale West.

Yeah, I mean, but realistically the Astro is probably gonna win it, but it's a little value.

And then Julio Rodriguez wins the MVP.

Yeah okay. Oh, and actually I'm gonna add the A's over fifty seven okay seven?

Now, okay, bad Larry is on the way to Maine with his wife and his wife's sister and anything you would like to say before we let you go on your merry way.

No, I'm first of all girls. Are we going to round Delli? Look it up for me. I gotta get off pretty soon for lunch. I want to hear what Shay's opinion of P.

Did he is, Oh, he's busted. Did you see his drug mule got popped with cocaine this year?

He was basketball playing.

Yeah, yeah, I got busted right in front of him. He was like, these aren't mine, this is.

My employees. This college ed dropped my cocaine. But I saw a picture of the two of them together and it looked hilarious.

That's tough to get caught in a private plane with dope like that means somebody has to know you have it on you and they come get it.

The Juice world died. Juice wrld the rapper. He had like a bunch of he had a ship ton of pills and they're basically told like when you land, like the Feds are gonna be waiting for you. So he ate them all and died.

Why didn't he flush him?

I don't know, Jesus Christy.

It's like the first time his kids are busted. Amateur, I should be teaching a ted fucking masterclass about this ship.

But yeah, they rated two of P. Diddy's homes and yeah, I.

Saw that that was a couple of days ago. But didn't he flyers playing down at Antiguerst.

He was empty. He was on it.

Yeah, he wasn't even on it. You see, they said, like the army to go, h hit his houses. That's when you know somebody has been cooperating.

Yeah, and they turned them upsided down to the after pictures. They were thorough.

I've been hit before. I will say the police usually overestimate the dangers. They can get their fucking toys out on the road and they act like, oh, yes, he's got a violent pass. If they have a snitch that just says this dude is unruly and on head meds and it has an affinity towards pistols, they will send in the fucking army, even though you're just sitting at your mama's house smoking a joint.

And that happened to you. Yeah, door got kicked in? What did mom say? One there?

Oh my brother and I were getting stoned and uh, door got kicked in. And I tried to like run out the back and I looked out the back and they were fucking even more cops. And I had this visor on. Shout out to the detective that fucked this up. I had this visor on back in the day. I was like eighteen years old, and it had a side pouch. Remember rus the tennis shoes. Yeah, yeah, they had that side pouch for the condom. Well, you just put cocaine

It was a nice little cherry.

Yeah. So family's four brother But yeah, they kicked in the door. They were fucking coming heavy. He was bullshit.

Yeah no, no, I mean it's nice.

Skated on the charges. By the way, I skated. It just took a minute. Okay, Yeah, time heels all lose, not guilty. Pitch was counting mother again.

It's good to be white.

It was great.

I had the shadiest attorney in the world too.

His pants were loose.

Oh yeah, uh a bad Larry Safe travels there and my best to MB.

Thank you guys. Hey, good luck. I see you have one team left in that final four. Someone sent me your your final four picks.

Good luck Oregon, Jillen always a pleasure boy.

Rag Marv. Thanks but.

Uh Shaye and Irving podcast wherever you get your podcast available and everything is good at home, So therefore the podcast is probably back burner stuff like it's not no, no.

We did uh. We had samip on last week which ruined my Twitter account, and we got the DJ End of the Year Honors coming up, and we got a bracket challenge too, or we're gonna give away some uh the prize is uh. I don't know if I can say it on the air, but it's gonna be interesting when they receive it.

A toolkit.

It's a toolkit. Okay, yeah, it's safety It's a safety kit. Really is Puffle one seed?

I was gonna say p Diddy in the running for djen.

He Oh yeah, he's up there. But so is this uh interpreter now the interpretering big time. But there's a couple of them that are uh surprise ads.

Yes, hold on, so Luther Campbell from Two Live Crew, Uncle Luke, he he said in an interview recently, maybe yesterday that he used to leave the parties before it got too crazy, that P didd P Diddy's house. If luke me so horny leaves the parties before it gets too crazy, that's when you.

Know he not so horny.

He was doing I think he was doing some like weird sexual ship too.

Yeah, like, well that's what that's what producer.

I don't understand, Like sex trafficking a grown woman.

I don't know.

I don't understand.

I don't know.

Well, I think they can stick that. I think like procuring prostitution.

Yeah, if you bring a hooker across state lines, I know that, I know that one. But but if you just got somebody who's yeah, yeah, it's something like that's a commerce cause it's some constitution. Can't bring a whole cross state lines. Everybody knows that. But if you're in trouble for sex trafficking and he was still dating this woman, it's the same. It's just it's it's really weird. I don't understand it. I don't understand it.

But I know he's in deep connection to allegation and some sex trafficking, uh, sexual assault and solicitation and distribution of illegal narcotics and firearms.

Yeah, they're gonna suck him for the dry the drugs and guns thing. Obviously you're beat. Like you're gonna get beat to hell on.

That sex trafficking thing they'll probably have. That's gonna be more of like proving that actual charge.

I don't know, man, it sounds like he was a fucking maniac. Little kid cut his car. Do you hear about that? She was his girl was like Dayton kid cutting with some you know, they were probably doing acid and counting the stars or some fucking lame ship. And he was so mad about it. He's like, I'm gonna blow that dude's car up and she was like, no, you're not. Don't do it please, And then like a week later, that car got blown the fuck up in the driveway, just lit up.

Coincidence like a Christmas tree.

He loves you.

That's that's passion. Yeah. Can I add one?

Sure?

Yeah?

Yeah, just another dejen bank he can be in the dej end of the ear thing. He's up there. Oh yeah, and just Nickelodeon as a whole.

Oh my god, dude, So my kids watch that ship and if you really pay attention to some of them, shows like unchy weird as, like two dudes like that Ray, what's the name of the the danger for show where the guys Captain Man, Captain Man watch this ship. Captain Man's like a forty year old single dude and his sidekick is like a twelve year old boy who previewed passant like motherfucker ain't gone through puberty yet. And they hang out together all the time and there's like hugs

With that, we we leave you this week, and good luck with your baseball bets March madness, and we look forward to talking to you next week. Here, Dan Patrick takes a Captain