Episode 106: Fatrick Mahomes

Gambling was something that I did. This is Dan Patrick takes a gamble. One of my bookies died at the kitchen table, a podcast vehicle for Dan to talk about his love of gambling. One bet, another bet, another bet without doing the actual gambling. You're a coward. It's easy to have a scapegoat. And now join my bad Larry, Shayan Irving and Dylan the graphics guy. I have friends. Here's Dan Patrick, Oh, back from Vegas and it's time to pay up on some bets. Now, let me let

This ree units lost? Danny and mathematically I was behind by probability.

Wise, Yeah, you had quite a few over thirty five bets thirty eight.

And I smoked him. I smoked him. I smoked him.

Danny all right like a blunt Yes, Ray, Yes, Ray, Yes.

So Dylan had six bets, Shay had thirty eight.

Bets, okay, And what was the end up when it was the end result?

Oh well, yeah, go ahead.

Shay won ten units and Dylan lost four.

Oh my god, five, I'm sorry he smoked him. Now we came up with the loser was going to get a Riba McIntyre tattoo. She sang the anthem We met her boyfriend, Rex Lynn the actor, And then did you reach out to him to get RIBA's signature? Yes? I did.

And funny story behind that is so the day after one of Reba's biggest, I would say, biggest performances of her life, he told me that he was talking to Riba about Dylan getting the tattoo. The first thing they talked about in the morning was Dylan getting a tattoo.

Okay. So, by the way, the over under was a ninety and a half and the tattoo is going to be is it riba ninety point five? Is that what they're both going with.

I think Dylan's just getting the signature. I think Shay will get the ninety and a half.

I'm a purist.

Then okay, so I'm eccentric, Danny.

Okay, you're getting So Dylan is getting his tattoo on his back. They're prepping him. They're shaving his back right now.

It's gonna take an hour.

Danny. You looking at your body, You're you're Fatrick mahomes.

The weed whacker to get the rest of that back here too.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yes you are. You're an MV pig. And then Shay, you're getting your riba tattoo where either.

On my thigh or the root cage? I don't know yet, Danny.

Okay, when when you're going to de sign?

Probably when I look in the tattoo.

Okay, well one is you take off your shirt, the other you take off your pants.

I love taking my pants.

Okay, then the thigh it is, okay, all right, so that's uh. We'll run through all the bets. But Dylan lost five units last week, Shay won ten. Shay ended up plus four on the season, Dylan minus eight.

Bad.

Larry lost five units minus twenty five.

How did I lose five units?

There we go, Here we go.

How is he not getting a tattoo?

Because I said no, one not that.

Yeah, you know, I couldn't convince him to get loser across his foreheads. So if you look hard enough, it's already there.

Hold on five units on the coin flip, five units on the game that lost. That's even. I had three units on three bets. I went two and one, and I had one of you four guys or two years on four guys to score a touchdown Kelsey CMC scored any other three did Larry?

Let's slid Dan direct the traffic. Okay, we'll get to you.

Okay, all right, I'm gonna need to You're gonna want to chug that. I'm going to be here for a while, so I better get something to Yeah, okay, so here we go. I see. So, Dylan, do you want to recap? You won the coin toss? That's it. I won the coin toss. Yeah.

I was like, oh, we're off to a good start. And that was as good as you got. I lost that parlay I did, which actually the point total was yeah, fascinating topic because yeah, one, if you had it, it was forty seven and a half. That was tough, forty seven, and then right before kickoff forty six. Yeah, but like that, if you had forty six and a half. That's a brutal beat.

Yeah you missed, you missed your parlay Gatorade an octopus and George Kettle to be MV pick. Yeah he was not. I think he had thirteen yards. Yeah, he was barely playing the MV pick. Let me recap, Shay he lost. Christian McCaffer MVP Kelsey twenty five receiving yards first half. Let me see the ones. You got Purty and mahomes over twenty five pass attempts each. You had the Chiefs taking the two and a half and Debo rushed numbers

Dude?

I the use I lived above a Perogi shop in Chicago for several years.

It's my favorite polock amazing.

Uh used check over three and a half yards first quarter under nine and a half over, ninety point five seconds on the anthem. Yeah, she came through, but she came through on a technicality. I think, oh no, no sho. Okay, she was on her way to the under. But then she took nearly twelve seconds to say brave and the brave.

I loved it.

When she did that, I went, oh, she's over. I love it. Just certified gangster move right there. Yep, yeah, the over under no phtal anthem ninety point.

Five Djen Hall of fame. I liked it.

I loved it all right. Let's recap bad Larry. He had the niners. He had the over under twenty forty seven and a half the under.

No, no, that was forty seven. I was a push stand. There's who are you a lot there? Who are your stealings on me?

No?

I'm not. I'm going by what Ray has down here. Why do you think I'm stealing from you?

Okay, go ahead, keep reading. I'm out in front of me.

Ray. You never do, and then you think that we're stealing from it. Ray, explain this, Larry.

It was forty seven and a half. I have it on my sheet. I did not edit the sheet. You had forty seven.

That's fine. I trust Ray you. I trust okay.

So that that end, that's four units. So you lost five units on the niners right, one on a coin flip, and then four units the over. You lost three units on mahomes passing numbers under you got three units McCaffrey longest reception over thirteen and a half and over one hundred and twenty combine yards one twenty four and a half. So you got that McCaffrey anytime score. That's two units, and then you lost two on Kelsey anytime score, put checko,

Larry, that would add up to any ideas minus five units.

I had minus one, but I had my over under the push. Okay, oh now you've got okay, you're right, Ray, I trust you. Go ahead.

Think.

I know, I know won, I know I won my under I mean my over bet in real life, but I guess I lost it on a shadow.

No, No, this is real life.

The tattoo is.

Real life, Dan, Yeah, can I hear the tattoo as the tattooing started over there, we're underway, Dan, Okay, can I get a Can I hear some of that?

Move the mic? Dylan?

Yeah, well I'm trying not to move because I don't want to suck it up.

Well, do we have an do we have another microphone that I can at least hear the tattoo?

Yeah?

Here we go.

Oh I like that getting it done?

Yeah? I like that. So that's uh Dylan.

I was hoping I was gonna have to lean over any further because it's not exactly a more flattering position.

So so Dylan is doing Dylan. That's evolution tattoo in New Haven, Connecticut. Who came in just so we could Dylan does Dylan? Yes, so we could experience that. So congratulations to all involved, and uh especially you, uh Shay, I guess you're the big winner. Yeah, yeah, congratulations. Never thought that the congratulations.

Yeah.

Yeah. That's a long season, man, first things, Yeah, that really is that is a long season.

I think great.

Can can I just have a microphone on the tattooing the entire time that we're on? Is that possible?

Here?

Just so yeah, we got a week's going on there. It might be a little tough. But I can hold the mic up there too if we need to.

Okay, but if we can get a little sound so people can get that experience. Wow, wow, get that then ingenuity. Yeah, I'd like for it a little more pronounced here. So well, you still have to hear bad Larry, Right, Well, I don't have to.

How does it feel? Feel?

Which part? Fine? Okay? So it doesn't hurt? No? Okay, are you sure I'm trying. I'm trying. I'm trying very hard not to move at all, I know. So that's getting a rebait tattooed. She actually does have quite the beautiful She does have great penmanship, right, the signature, great, great, doing that for decades, recapping some of the stuff in Vegas, by the way, Dylan and Ray big losers, And in Vegas Tuesday night Shay arrived. Wednesday, you were on your best behavior.

I was a good boy, Danny, and then Thursday night she got weird.

Okay, but then you had a problem with a dealer named Tina.

Oh my god, fucking Tina. What happened, Danny.

So some people are just mad at their childhood, mad at their life. I mean, she was wearing a mask as if it was COVID four point zero.

Well maybe when she saw you here we go.

Yeah, but she was mean, Danny mean.

Well, tell me, were you gambling with other people?

I was. Yeah.

There was a table full of people, Dylan Ray, a couple of the betties that they brought in.

And sometimes when you when you're next to somebody who does stupid things with their cards, that affects your cards big time.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was very rude, and Tina let everybody know that. I told Tina that, chill the hell.

So there was a degenerate next to you who decided to split g we're talking about Virginia, the dude who split fives.

That motherfucker.

Danny split five with a ten showing, but fives with a ten showing didn't sit.

Well with me. And the dealer was showing a six. I think he was worked for the casino. He was washing money. He's a cooler. Oh you think so?

It was bad cooler at a ten dollar table, you know how they.

Okay, yeah, it's gonna take him a while. And then it was really sad to see, is it binions? Is that the casina.

I went back to Binyons.

Okay, so he goes to Binyons alone and he's by himself playing craps. Nothing is sadder in Vegas than seeing a grown man by himself, because usually craps is hey hard, six man, give me five? Yeah, people are partying. Yeah, everything's great. Right, and then all alone alone, And then when Shay left the crabs table, what happened lit up the game like a Christmas tree.

Like I'm not kidding.

I went to go play black Jacket and Binion's they have these girls. They have them dressed like, you know, scantily clad and push up bras and whatnot. Please stick around, right, And I'm playing blackjack and this girl is just giving me the time of my life. She's just ruining everything I know about. And I can't leave because I'm a glutton for punishment. And I look over my shoulder after I lost my six hand in a row, and the craps table that I just left as twelve people around it.

They just gave it to them.

And now They're all having the best time of their life and I'm alone with this.

You know, man hating woman in a push up braw burned a hole through me with a green eyes.

Dylan, I didn't know how you did gambling. I know Tuesday wasn't good, fucking terrible.

Honestly, Tuesday was the tip of the iceberg. Then I just got my lunch eat by blackjack.

Yeah.

All week, and then we Friday night, after we were you know, done with everything, I walked back to the Fountain Blue like just fucking lost six hundred dollars at the Sahara.

I'm like, I'm gonna.

Put one hundred dollars hand down because the minimum for fifty at that point.

Anyways, Oh yeah, if I win, I'm going upstairs.

And I at least made a hundred bucks back, throw a hundred down, get a fourteen hit bust, and I'm like, fuck this shit, I'm going upstairs.

And I was like, I am ready to leave tomorrow. I was nervous when I guess it was Wednesday when somebody I said, have you seen Shay And they go, oh yeah, Dylan and Ray went up to his room and I go, oh no, no, no.

No, we're actually you know what it was, there's nothing the fairy is going on.

Did a podcast, Yeah, we did a podcast.

Podcast.

You did your podcast, Oh my god, which you could argue is worse than whatever you imagine we're doing.

What's more detrimental.

Yeah, all right, let's turn our attention to this week while Dylan gets his Riva McIntire. It's just Riva, Notriva McIntyre. Correct, No, I think she signed just Riba Okay, of course. Well, yeah, she's tired. Yeah here, Yeah, she's a she's a one name artist, you know. Reva and her boyfriend Rex Lynn was awesome.

Gah guy, great guy.

He's a good dude.

Yeah.

We just sat there and meet Friday and had the trigger and we had a We had a great time.

Yes, yes, Ray, Yeah, he went on a tangent about he was riding unlike Dylan. He was riding Iowa overs all year.

Yeah.

They fucked me every single week. Uh that. So let's turn her attention to bets this week post super Bowl. I guess we have some golf in college basketball, Shay, So I'll start with you.

I got two units on Can't Pay minus one sixty five for the top twenty.

That's that's Patrick Kent.

Every time I bet on them, you can't pay.

Fowler plus three twenty, that's again in the top twenty college basketball.

You all are gonna take me crazy.

But Pacific plus sixteen against Santa Clara.

Then they've lost eleven games.

And the way, I don't care, Okay you Danny, all right, Rutgers minus four against Evanston.

Letting their best player out for the season.

Yeah, correct, but it's seven, Okay, all right, SMU two Lane under one fifty eight and a half. And then I'm going back to the old.

The Jaguars, South Bama laying the two against the Bobcat. And it doesn't matter what sport you take.

South at an affinity to Mobile, Yeah, I love South Bama. Anything else, yeah yeah, Minnesota Purdue under one forty seven. And then I got some MLB futures. Okay, I got Ballmer plus fourteen hundred to win the World Series.

Okay, Mets plus five thousand.

I love it.

Larry's gotta be ready to bet on the right.

If anybody's going to make it a move anyway, Okay, Philly plus fifteen hundred, Braves plus four fifty Ale East I got Ballmer plus two tenn uh. And then the Cardinals to win the central two units plus one forty easy, peasy.

Okay, Dylan, all right, Dan, uh the Genesis. How's the tattoo looking over there? I hope good?

Okay, but I think we're in good shape. Then, okay, I got my guy JT top five plus three six Thomas, Okay, wow.

Every week Sahita Gala to win plus thirty five hundred.

I had a strong showing at the disastrous waste management, did you guys?

Awesome?

Yeah, it's so awesome it did.

It was very Woodstock ninety nine sound in the in the news articles.

I don't think it was.

Imagine being a cope dealer in Phoenix that week.

I mean just that's that's not where I would have gone. Oh right, But Dylan, did you and Ray have a bet last year on the who wins the next first major?

Oh?

Yeah? Major? First? I had justin Thomas and Ray had what more account and more count? Yeah? I still like that. Okay, Wait, are you guys have a bet this year?

Well it's kind of just like a standing bet. Oh okay, okay, So next one to win a major?

Uh? And then you said, uh, say the Gala to win plus thirty five hundred. And you guys saw him at the Travelers in Hartford, Connecticut.

Yeah, and Ray was like, the nice round today, he missed the cut. But how are we to know, Dan, We're drinking fifteen beers and eating as many hot dogs.

As possible, right, anything else?

Yep, I'm going yes to hole in one of the tournament. I usually go no, but I jtu practicing hit a hole in one I think earlier today.

But no, they're playing today, all right? Sorry? Yes, yay, Yeah, they're playing today. So that's plus one for ye.

And then I've got a little NHL parlay Rangers money line against the Habs, the krack and money line against the Bruins, an Avage Avalanche money line against the Lightning plus six fifteen. And then also I heard a rumor that there's a Denver College basketball game.

Oh yeah, I got to add that, Danny Denver lane three and a half, Bang bang.

Harvard to the west End. I'm going to ride that too. You know they suck, but that brings us to bad Larry Oh.

Wow, okay, to your wow what Larry Hockey Ben whatever? You guys just bet I couldn't even follow it.

Hockey.

Yeah, I'll follow hockey. You start betting the ice, you got to give it up. I'm betting the I'm betting the NBA All Star Game.

Oh wow, are you? And you're giving me a sh I.

Haven't left my house yet. I have yesterday's newspaper. The lines weren't it from yesterday?

To you?

As I said, the only guy I trust in that on this lead right now?

Do that every week you go? You know, I don't know the lines. And I just got him out of the paper all right.

My bookie didn't even have the player props on Wednesday when we had to send him in last week.

Okay, you're betting on the yesterday's newspaper.

You're betting on the All Star Game West minus two against each okay over three sixty four. And I didn't see a line. The paper doesn't have a line for the first half over. But I want the first half over. Also, four units on the first half over, two units on the other two NBA bets. Okay, Ray, I'll trust you on whatever line you give me on that first week.

Stop. Nobody's trying to mess with you. Have you met Ray? Why is he the one you trust the most.

You give me just sent me a picture of somebody sent me a picture of Dylan walking across the casino floor the first night. You guys are out there, you know, like Dylan looking good after fifteen beers or whatever it was. I thought it was that guy from a national Lampoon vacation, one of the Grizzwolds that out. What was that ouse that you were sporting?

I thought I looked good. Larry, Sorry, Larry, you given fashion, But I don't know. Yeah, I don't know if we should be doing that.

Good picture I saw you. None of you guys thought Dylan looked weird that first night.

I'm sure plenty of people did, but not because we got a lot of Ron Jeremy comparison.

Well, sure there is Jeremy.

I wish, I wish I could say that was the first time that I had gotten that comparison.

Yeah, it's really just the mustache, but it's only Yeah, there's only a couple of comparisons there. Yeah, it was.

How disappointed?

Are they the only cool one? If you want the comparison to Ron Jeremy, you'd like to have the whole package, you know, except.

You know, unless exchanging prison sentences. Then I think I'm getting all right.

You could be the boss in that bad Larry.

Do we have anything else?

Yeah?

One unit on Victor Hovelin this day.

How about a round of a clue hovey Larry hobby Land Larry pronounced it correctly.

Yeah, so I got him one unit top twenty and one unit top ten.

Okay, I like Victor Hovelin, Loving Victor. Yeah, he's all right. That's uh. I think that's it. I don't know if we have anything else over under Caitlin Clark. Do we have an over under h Ray?

No over under on points, but we have how she will break the record?

Oh?

Okay, so it's a three, a two, or a free throw.

Give me the free throw, give me the free throw.

Yeah, I want the free throw? Free throw?

How many? How many points does she need?

Eight?

I'll take I'll take the three?

Good back.

What are the odds they have? The odds best odds are for three, I think, aren't they?

Righty?

That is correct, Okay, I'm gonna take I'm gonna take a layup. Probably that's probably the smart bet. Honestly, I don't know. I don't know what the smartest bad. I mean three, throw plus four fifty lock it in. Yeah, I'll match that.

It's gonna be a logo three, logo three.

Wait, so what if she it's she doesn't get the.

Line that often, honestly doing research.

Doesn't take a three. Yeah, her first three shots of the game might be three, Larry.

They want you to think she's gonna take a three. She's gonna be driving. She wants you to think she's taken three. She's gonna have like a little hesitation dribble and then coin and then dart through and then lay in and then that's it. I don't know if she'd do a euro step. She might, but she did say I hope they don't stop the game because I don't want us to burn a time out. I thought that was pretty good. Yeah, a lot of fun.

So the best, the best to break the record, right? Eight?

Yeah? Yeah?

Yeah, yeah?

Okay, the three three?

What am I getting? I am I getting plus eight hundred?

What? Wait for what?

No? The opposite, Larry, No, I think that's the favorite.

Yeah, the favorite is to get a three minus one twenty five Still pretty good odds though, eight hundred insane?

What the fuck isn't that crazy?

It's like, what does she shoots?

Gambler? No, she shoots better than twenty five from three. I think she shoots like forty, doesn't she's close to forty. Yeah, she's good. She shoots forty seven overall. I think, Yeah, like that, Larry.

I'm saying, I'll stay. I'll stay with the three. Yeah, she's gonna just cancel that all together.

But you want to take a free throw, Larry. Now we've talked to this.

She's shooting thirty nine percent from three.

Wow, are you comfortable? Larry?

I'm saying with the three, Okay, good one unit.

Uh, Dylan has done it. D Yeah, it's tonight at seven point thirty on Peacock. Dylan from a Evolution tattoo in New Haven is killing it. We want to thank them for coming in short notice. Ray Ray was calling around see if we could get somebody to come in, and uh, boy, you imagine your tattoo artist and you walk in and you go, Okay, who am I tattooing? And then Dylan goes, you're tattooing, and then Shay goes, and then I want a tattoo on my inner thigh.

Yeah, it only gets worse.

Yeah, yeah, uh so we'll put this out on social media, but you'll be able to see Dylan get his tattoo and then Shaye getting his. Now are you going to do on your ribcage or your thought?

I don't know you, Danny. I'm gonna fus.

You're in the on deck circle.

Oh my thought. I got the other thigh done. I figure you get the other one.

Get some action, you know, some action? Yeah, I need to I need to leave right after this.

I did not.

Shay started talking about getting a Prince Albert too. While yeah we're done. Well he likes it in the can. Hey, okay, bad Larry, thank you, and uh I hope I gotta.

Run my life. Just sent me a shopping list.

Business, Oh, Larry, go go of course.

I got a Cola Corona and Corona Light is on the list, and I know like a plenty of but can so we're good.

I got Larry. That's bad Larry, bad Larry. It's a shopping list, as if it's like an emergency. I gotta go right now. Yeah, he's gonna take him all day to find the ship.

Ye I was gonna say, what are the odds that he brings everything back on that list.

What's three thousand?

I got peanut butter? All right, So Dylan is almost done with his tattoo, and then it'll be Shay's a turn. We'll put that up on social media. By thanks to Marvin who has to listen to this ship every week. Also Ray who produces this or at least a reasonable fact simile, and and uh weeks our camera guy has to watch shooting down my cleavage for the last cleavage you do? You you do got a lot of clear Yeah, pretty hot? Yeah yeah, pretty hot. I make it work