Welcome to Dad's one day Clok. Parental discussion is advised mature content beyond this point.
I went into the front lobby earlier and there was a sign that said I'll be back by four point thirty. And all I needed was some plates stuff, And so I started looking around for him myself, and in one of the cabinets there was probably about fifty fucking bananas just chilling in a cabinet.
Maybe he was a ninja from Zalda. Who knows do they do?
This is a stretch, but do they do some form of like a continental breakfast?
They do? They started at seven point thirty.
That's where your banana's coming and play.
It's a weird place to keep them, dude, in the bottom fucking of a cabinet where I.
Mean to keep them?
Yeah, you gotta keep them away from all the bombs on the road, you know, like, well, like I'll be home tomorrow night. That bananas looking great, unlike my husband, who doesn't look great. Where's all the bananas going? You just hear a banana?
Do you know what it's like to open a cabinet and just get like a giant whiff of fucking bananas? Some of which felt old. Dude, It's like it's like opening up a bag of airheads and that's the or laffy taff I mean, and that's the only fucking flavor in the bag. How disappointed?
Would you be? Severely?
Right? Yeah, I'm looking for plates. In the first cabinet, I open as a fucking cabinet of like fifty bananas. And it's not an exaggeration like it's a it's a double wide bass cabinet. It was full of fucking bananas. I picked a wild motel.
Dude.
It's fitting. Yeah, it's fitting. I love it. You're gonna be some kind of delay probably the whole time, So that's exciting.
Is the his mic is coming in fine?
Yeah, video, it's just the lag.
The video is like lagging, but his mic is coming through fine.
So yeah, all right, so you can hear my audio, you just can't see my video.
Your video is like half a those second behind, a little bit behind, like just a little bit.
Amh. That's it.
That's the one, all right. So I hasn't figured out there's a mute button.
Sorry, yeah, listen, Muting myself requires me to take my fucking hand.
That microphone around.
I didn't hit the mute button. Nice, can you hear me?
No, okay, we can hear you now. That was we get shout out to hazebe the guy running the front desk that's currently siphoning off doms information. Dude's name is my friend. You go through these many pages of bard dub.
No, this dude is. This dude is like a fucking anorexic me and his name is Mitchell. You hit the fucking nail on the head when you said ship's creaked. He's a City one guy. Yeah, yeah, you hit the fucking nail on the head when you said ship's creaked. Dude.
Why, I mean, you know that's you're you're talking about, like the Internet? And I was like, aren't you at a hotel? Like what do you even reset the router? It's a hotel? Like no, no, it's a motel. Like oh okay, yeah.
Oh, weren't we supposed to come in with a dad joke? Hey, guys, so, uh have you heard about the crow that was on the telephone pole but was having a hard time He was trying to make a call but it wouldn't go through.
See on the telephone line of your motel.
Possibly he'd be electrocuted if he was on that motherfucker. That's kind a pair of shoes are up there?
Are those nineteen ninety seven Jordan's up there, Better go down and get him now.
They're twenty twenty four. Is they're the kid that's running around barefoot with no fucking parent.
Named Mitchell at the front desk.
Named Mitchell at the front desk.
He throws his own shoes up there because his board as hell.
This place is wild.
He probably shuts down the internet or limits it just to get people to come in and talk to him.
Well, that was the funniest thing was when I went up to talk to him and ask him about the Internet and see if he could do something like reset the router, and he tells me straight faced, He's like, it's working great for me. I've been downloading games and playing games and watching movies all night. Like, thanks, Dick, So you're the fucking reason the internet's not working.
Cool, he's just siphoning all of it.
Yeah, So then he proceeds to tell me, He's like, well, you can just come into the front office and work if you want. I'm like, dude, I don't want to work in the office. I don't like, I've got all this ship that I gotta do. I'm gonna be up till fucking midnight. I'm supposed to be recording a podcast tonight, and I really don't want to record this podcast in your lobby with people walking in and out.
There's on top I'm eating your ass.
The dude at the front desk. You just hear him randomly go ah, I'm just laughing at you.
Yeah. Could you imagine recording this podcast in a family of like five come in, you know, all little kids under the age of ten, but.
They can't hear anybody but you but me.
Yeah, but I'm the worst family. Good stuff, Jacob Matthew, don't in this strange man.
Yeah. Yeah, next thing, you know, the cops show up, and then the whole episode just me fucking getting arrested and beating my cops. That's it.
Why would they beat you?
Did Jordan's agent? Did you guys? Did you guys put in the episode?
Oh?
I mean what did you guys put in the episode?
That jew? No, that was the actual cops. Like we were kind of astonished ourselves. We thought that was way past us, but you know, uh, it wasn't Rodney King. It was a dome you know, Smegelberg Domeg.
That was like, that's your new boorn name, Johnny six. S Megelberg, come up with a Jewish name. If I ever opened a bagel shop, That's what my bagel shop is going to be called. Schmegelberg Berg.
I write this down this episode, I don't even notice that.
It was just it doesn't mass and just yeah smack Albert, welcome to episode. What are we on one seventy? Yeah, I'm Domee. I'm stoned. Obviously I'm not buying anto this. Oh shit.
Okay, So speaking of who we are, how is your agent? Let's go with your week, because it was your week like to yesterday capped off the week for the Stone.
Yeah, yeah, you know, it was pretty good. It was pretty good.
I did have a wedding to go to on on the eve of yesterday and for twenty and I didn't get as wrecked as I wanted to in the evening because I went to like meet a whole bunch of my girlfriend's family and have you know, be nice for the reception and everything and be coherent, and that would be obliterated. You know, Hi, nice to meet you, ag. That's a bush. Oh sorry, Hi, nice to meet you. That's a hoe.
You don't call her a hoe. No, it's a co We're in the fucking garden.
Like, what do you think? But it was a good time. I did get wrecked the morning of Yeah, let me tell you. I was just praying to God that we found all the Easter eggs. I was praying to God also the night before. I love four twenty deals for Segange because holy shit, every single year I always get some like crazy amount of shit for on the cheap, like on the cheap cheap.
Now I'm gonna say I'm gonna say so, like early in the week, I sent you a text with information for our local area, right, And.
I love that they give you guys that in advance because the majority of them around here day of that's when you find out, or you might find out midnight the night before.
Right, because you have so much competition. But the one thing I'll say is like our deals were cool, but like they're not deals like what you got going on?
Oh man, dude, two hundred and fifty six dollars worth of weed something like that. I think two sixty three.
Yeah, that's not how much. And I got it for ninety three dollars.
Yeah, there you go.
Yeah that was like that was that was like regular regular value was that? And yeah, and I wanted to go morning of but I was like, no, the only other thing I would love to get that I get every year is like a dollar, you know, like pre roll and you get like a dollar, you know, eighth or quarter. And I was like, but I don't. I don't do that side of it. I just like stuff that doesn't stinks, so it's not going to benefit me any good. So I just like stuck with the normal
stuff that I usually get. But I love it because I'm set for like the next probably six months, you know, worth of stuff.
It's the best seventy fucking great, great, magical And like I think last year I got like the same, but I also.
Got it was pretty close.
I remember you like I got the like flower with him, but I was like last year, I was, I don't need this. But it was a good time. And then today I had the day off. I just got my PowerPoint done for one of my last classes, just ended it. So glad we got three left, baby, three more classes left were done, and yeah, hung out with aves Win, got some sushi, ate way too much, and then yeah, that was it. Round out my day. Yeah, no, meat baby, it was pretty good.
I had some family in town, so we did some extracurricular activities. We went to the zoo that's like outside of town and saw all the you know, animals that get rejected by the zoos.
It's aptly named Keepers of the Wild. Yeah, yeah, because the people that own it are fucking wild.
Yeah, they're a little bit cuckoo for sure. But it was cool. I mean, it's a good time. I think it's a little uh.
Man.
If you went at the right time and all the animals are really active, I think it'd be worth what they're charging for. But if you go and the animals aren't doing a whole lot, you're like, wow, I just dropped, like how much on this? Yeah, But whatever, it's the experience. It's good. Had a good Easter weekend. I decided on a whim when I woke up yesterday, being Easter and being four to twenty, I was like, I'm going to do the stone to favor and I'm going to celebrate along.
So I took an edible at nine thirty. I took an edible at one thirty an edible. Yeah, I was like, I'm just staying. I'm staying the same way all day. And the only one that was really a hitter was when I went to take the one at like one thirty and I was still like, I still felt like I was just on the other side of the peak on the comedown but still up high. And I was like, I'm gonna drop another one right now. Now.
It's always at first repeater and you're like, I don't know about this, and the other two you're just like.
Pop.
The third one I popped out. I was like, man, what a leftdown, Larry. I don't even I better go take another one just in case, Like I don't think this was working. But I did not. I did not fall to my own trap.
So good, it's good.
But it was good. Yeah. So Dom and I went golfing on Saturday morning, like the butt ass crack of dawn. It was a little bit old for the first it was perfect though, but then yeah, it was still gorgeous, so.
It was really nice. I actually I liked I liked us leaving as the crowd was showing up.
It was getting big.
It was definitely right there.
Yeah, it was definitely worth fighting the first like what three four holes of kind of chilliness.
Yeah, there were chili in the holes. What kind of golf course were you guys at Damp? Was it that kind of clubhouse.
You know where?
How was your weekdom So far?
So good? Last week wasn't too terrible. I just kind of worked and dicked around and dealing with kids being sick. The kids have been sick one after another, so we I had to pick up Cali and take her to urgent care last week one of the day's Thursday. Yeah, and then it just kind of rolled into the next kids.
But then I got I got asked to go to Napa County and I'm up here in Wine Country because there was an emergency need for a safety oversight for one of the jobs out here and they didn't have anybody, and I just said yes because it's decent money. So it's only like five days if you count Sunday, the day that I flew.
Yeah, I have to do a callback on this episode. I just think it's funny that anybody that's listened to this for a long time, or maybe you're brand new to this and you haven't tuned out yet because you're retarded. But domet being a safety officer just brings the call back to the story and being up on a ladder kicking out of his panty.
I did it. I did it safely. Okay, I did it safely. That's all that matters. Strikes again. So the great the greatest part about this, right is that they have somebody shadowing me the first day, so today, because of course I told him my daughter, like, look, I can't I can't work all week under no circumstances will I work Friday. I have to be back in Vegas on Friday. My daughter has a dance competition and I'm not going to miss it. I don't care about your
emergency that much. So so they're like, Okay, that's fine, we'll figure it out. And they have somebody who has never been a safety officer before. She is safety trained and she is very smart. I will give her that, but she she's never done this before, or she's never done safety oversight, so it's a little different. And so they had her shadow me today and all I kept hearing was why am I here? Like like, okay, what
am I here for? Okay? I don't understand, Like I don't understand what am I supposed to be here for. And I'm like, will you just fucking stand there and watch people, like that's your job.
All of a sudden, you slowly here zipper like.
You're like, your your job, your job. I can't tell you this enough. Your job is to know what to do if something goes wrong. Your job is to fill out the paperwork that I am showing you how to fill out. Just stand here and watch people take pictures, note everything, like, write down notes. You have a book, you have a journal, Like, just write everything down. It doesn't matter, it doesn't it doesn't have to go into record. Just just write it down. Just write it down so
you can reference it later. Like what are they doing? What times are they doing things? It's just it's so simple. And she's like, can I just go back to looking at rocks. I'm like, checks check.
Their notes at the end of the week, because like, this guy is an idiot. He can't spell how this safety guy watches a lot of retired videos.
So dude, I'm I'll say it. I'm in the middle. When I say I'm in the middle of Wine Country, I mean I am in the middle of wine country, like the Sutter Hoolmes Wine Winery is down the block. Like these houses look like some old money houses, dude, some of them look like cartel houses. They're really cool. They're get drunk on the cheap let's go probably. But yeah, that's a whole nother story for offline. So yeah, there were you but checking wine with Mitchell earlier. Maybe it's
banana line. Motherfucker's making me. He's making banana line in the back of his fucking office back there.
Yeah, he's secretly making need under the counter side.
How how many how many of these wineries do you think, because I'm telling you, dude, like some of these houses are Okay, that sounds about right. How many? How many of these wineries do you think do things like under under the table and like on the low?
Oh, all their workers like everyone who picks grapes and ship none of them are filing taxes. You don't think so because they'd be deported if they did.
There is there is there are a conspiracy theory about the workers that work in wineries, and that the large.
I'm gonna leave that in the podcast.
Yeah, people, my Jesus, you could you could throw that in there and then hit the rewind button that you love so much that sound anyway, that was supposed to be a fucking lead into our first segment, which is conspiracy theories. I love conspiracy theories. I go down rabbit holes all the time. Mm hmmm. Do you guys have a favorite rabbit hole that you like to go down?
Oh, we've talked a lot about like I, Yes, definite favorites. What I ended up looking up this go around, though, was ones that I may have heard or may even have not have heard. Hold on, hold on, I have heard the conspiracy theory, but I never dove into the actual details of because it's outlandish to me.
You saw the headline, but you didn't read.
It, right, Okay, like my first one. I'll just say the first one, the moon isn't real. Okay.
Oh yeah, so I've.
Heard that, but you don't dive into it. And then I start to read and this brings up a whole mix of feeling. So it says some people think the moon doesn't exist. The conspiracy theory has gained particular attraction with flat earth. There's no surprise there, and they think the moon is simply a projection. So it's not about the moon being fake. But now what I want to know is, wait, a projection, So who's projecting it and what are they projecting it on?
The Saudis Dude, they got the wouldn't have money for any technology.
Projecting it on and wouldn't we that we're in That would exactly that unfolds, that sentence unfolds way more conspiracy theory than what I really want to get into, Like before I have a straight up panic attack, because that's straight up like matrix shit.
What if we are a terrarium? Right?
You know?
Like so, but I think that's I think it's a leading theory. So back in nineteen sixty two, I think it was the government did a bunch of testings that where they essentially wanted to know what the atomic bomb would do to the atmosphere, like what effects it would have if it went off in the atmosphere. You know what, They called it project fishbowl. Why would they call it project fishbowl if we weren't in a fish bowl? Right?
So you're saying that flat earthers aren't completely wrong, but they're not completely right because there's a flat bottom with correct globe around.
Exactly that and that would give you something to project the moon onto.
Every flat earth through out there just went So you're saying there's a chance.
I mean, there's a fuck load of physics that don't go with their theory. But yeah, I love I love the flat Earth conspiracy. I really do. I absolutely love it because it's cute. Yeah, there's there are just enough facts right to be like maybe, like maybe maybe there's a chance, and then reality kicks in and you're like Noah, never mind. But yeah, my I think my favorite one is the Pyramids, Like I.
Love talking about it, like the especially the new ship that's.
Come out, the new stuff that came out. Are these tunnels, these too light spir in sphir sphere spinnacles.
Yeah, now it makes sense why they had those barricades up all that time. They didn't want us to know what was really down there.
So my my theory with this is that the government or some entity right people that they know exactly what's going on with the Pyramids. They know who built them, they know what they were for, they know how they built them, everything about them that this is known, right, So, like the consensus with certain people and experts is that these slaves built them and they were tombs for people. But the problem with that is is that there were no bodies ever found in this Great Pyramid. Right, we'll
just talk about the Great Pyramids. Nobody's ever found in the Great Pyramid. So the tomb theory is lost. How can you say it's a tomb when there's no bodies, It doesn't add up.
Well, they're found around it.
Exactly. They were found around it, and like, oh, well they got pillaged, they they got stolen and everything robbed. Well, okay, but then why didn't some of the valuables that were in there too, Like wouldn't have just been wiped fucking clean? Oh, it was kind of too hard to get stuff out of Okay. The pyramids themselves were made up of massive stone structures. There's over one hundred fucking pillars that are in there that are like seventy tons each. They're granite.
These granite beams that are held that are holding up some of the structure of the Great Pyramid seventy tons each. Right, they were lifted to three hundred and fifty feet above the ground. That defies so many laws of physics, especially for the time, Like we don't have the technology to lift that much. Now, how the fuck did slaves do it? Then? Right, I don't care how many slaves you have. A thousand men don't equal one fucking crane that we have.
Now now, And they say like, oh, like row Bulley system and blah blah blah blah blah, it doesn't work because because what in all reality if they were that smart to get all of that, then they say that technology doubles every eighteen months, So we went for thousands years of regression after that exactly.
And what's crazy is like some of the granite that's found inside this pyramid is suspected to have been brought from over five hundred miles away. Right, some of the stones, with the precision that was cut, you can't fit a piece of paper in between them. Just the above ground structures. Let's not even talk about the new structures, just the above ground structures. It is said that with the technology they had at the time, that it would have taken
thousands of years to build it. With the ways that they are saying it got built, physics do not allow for this structure to be done the way they say it. But everybody believes it, and everybody just blindly fucking agrees that it's fine. I feel like there had to have been some other thing that built this structure and other structures. There's also pyramids that are found around the world. How
could pyramids? How could people in Mexico know exactly how to build a pyramid the exact way that people in Egypt did in the timeframe that they say that it happened. They wouldn't have had contact with each other. They wouldn't have even known that they existed. They shouldn't have. So we're missing. There's so much information that we're missing with this.
My conspiracy, like everybody talks about aliens and whatnot, my bare bone conspiracy that I wholeheartedly believe without a shadow of a doubt, is that there are people that are in this world that know exactly how they were made, why they were made, when they were made, by whom
they were made, all of it. They know everything, and they just don't give us the information because if they gave us that information, it would have literally changed the course of mankind, and they didn't want that to happen.
That's white privilege.
Yeah, probably, Yeah, what you.
Just describe right there, and who Majia, why they major They're still around.
They didn't go get the milk, They stuck around. Is that your conspiracy?
No, No, my conspiracy I was like, hold on like much less that black black dads stick around?
Is that the stick around? No?
My conspiracy is it's kind of one. I've been putting together a little bit. But I think like some floaters out there have like kind of alluded to the same thing that I'm saying. But like we all know that, you know, when World War two ended, the Nazis like scattered mostly to South America. They scattered up to a bunch of other places too. There's you know, there were people in in Russia, There's people that went to China,
there was people that went to Africa, especially South Africa. Yeah, but I think that you know, definitely a main hub with South America. But the point is is that his ideas and ideology like still got out like a virus, and I think it's been brewing out there for a minute and it's been just multiplying itself like a you know, like a virus would, and then it's going to get
to a point of potential sustainability. Where now what we're seeing with the rise of just people like just kind of weirdly blindly going for you know, stuff that is just anti semitic, whether it be in protest or people just straight up saying yeah, like I'm this I think is at like a crazy all time high that's like unprecedented. And so I think this has been like eighty years in the making of like a rise of that again.
And I don't know, I think in the future like that's going to be something that we're going to deal with again. You know, I think I think we're going to be old when it happens. But I do think it's going to happen. I do think that World War III is going to involve them again and somehow and in some big capacity, and they'll all be driving Tesla's.
Speaking speaking of test is that's another one. So the other one that that's kind of wild that I just kind of I heard more of is that Elon Musk is a plant. So there's people, Yeah, there's there's people in power that put him in place as a figure as a figurehead for all of these companies and entities to essentially, uh, take the the eyes off of who's really running things. They just want him as a kind
of a Manchurian candidate kind of thing. Uh yeah, and that he basically isn't smart and doesn't fucking doesn't really know what he's supposed to know and just fakes it. And there's some things out there that support this theory, Like he went on a rant where he was saying that he was the best gamer in the world for a couple of games like Path of Exile and Diablo three I think it was, uh, but then he somehow they got video of him playing or he played online
or something. I don't remember the exact dynamic and facts of it, but they watched him, these pro gamers watched him playing these games or this video of him playing these games and realized he absolutely sucked and didn't know the basic the basics of the game and called him out on it because he was claiming to be, you know, top ten in the world, top five in the world
or some shit like that. And then there was another thing that had come out where he had said some kind of science fact that wasn't right, and other some other things. And so there's a theory out there that basically somebody said, Okay, we have these companies, we don't want to be known to be running these companies, So we're going to find somebody, and they fucking took this guy and was like here you go, and they put him in place instead.
To add to that, he did say that he thinks that the simulation like matrix theory is pretty true, because it would make sense why he has it so good when he's probably a janitor in that real life, some guy just going home and putting on the VR and bam. And I was like, shit, damn all right, musk shit. So I'm some kind of weird support character in somehow
some way? Is that my code? I'm the support character? Shit, I cause your stock to drop on the stone baby one puff uff that cheeb and you were like, dude, worth a billion.
Less I got. I found another one that I've never heard, this one, and so it intrigued me. Prince Charles is a vampire.
I like that one.
I have heard that.
That one's funny.
He's actually genetically related and linked to Glad the Impaler, which was the inspiration for the bram Stroker Stokers. Dracula and many royals in Charles' budline were known to have the disease poor furia, which is an iron deficiency that causes people to be sensitive to sunlight.
I'm like, is that why it's always damn when he's outside? Guys go out when it's overcasting.
Which that also plays into the the doppelganger theories, Like you see a lot of celebrities that they find doppelganger pictures of them from a right and you're just like, maybe it's not a doppelganger. Maybe they maybe that's really who they are, you know, maybe it's not Joe Biden.
Well maybe maybe The other theory that goes to that is that some of these celebrities who have a shitload of money are cloning themselves, and they're making a clone of themselves, and then the clone kind of comes into life at some point, you know.
But then I read somewhere that there's a company in Europe up that will freeze your body for like X amount of dollars so then they can keep you in cryogenic stasis, uh like kind of like just freshly died until they like find a like cure in the future and they can revive you something like that.
And I was like, so I got a question, back back to your back to your three Jordan, would either of you guys allow a vampire to bite you to become a vampire, Like, would you become a vampire if you could?
I don't know. Part of me wants to say yeah, but part of me is also like, hold up, hold on.
If you were a vampire, would you only snack on fatties? You know, because they're like the junk food. After you get high in your vampire and you drop an edible, you're like, now I gotta go chase down B word, take a.
Bite, A bite you on B word for a year, the vampire would have a Charlie horse and it would still catch B word.
I actively, I do actively know that Beward does listen to this show, because he called me last week fucking roaring about how I hit the I hit the code in f m K, about how I called like the killing. Kate Upton was like, you know, blah blah blah. So and I do know he's listening to this, But man, could you imagine watching were trying to run from his from a fucking vampire?
Oh jesus, you could. Just I can't see the vampire turn into a bat thinking that he was gonna have to like chase and then just like immediately come out of the bat and be like, I don't know what the I'm doing, slowly like Michael Meyers, he pulls out a straw. He like pulls out a straw, undoes it from the plastic and just gets ready to like stick it in his neck juice box.
He pulls out like a piece of wood, like a long branch, and like ties a string with rotisserie chicken on it and puts it in front of himself and then he's off to the races.
Do you think b Word would even run from a vampire or do you think you just give up immediately?
I think I think I think b Ward would say, if you can puncture through it, you can have it.
That's fair.
Can you imagine if it broke the vampire's teeth, that's like a fucking jawbreaker. Dallas just wan and overtime, by the way, Hell yeah, yeah, that was a good if you if you, if you've seen me looking that way, and yeah yeah, b Ward.
B Word would have like two hundred byte marks and somebody like, why do you tune her bipe marks? And he'd be like he couldn't find the vein.
B Words like the rhino to a fucking vampire. You just can't puncture his fucking skin, Like, what the fuck happened to you? Oh that's great, I would do it in a heartbeat. No I didn't. I did not have another conspiracy. I mean, there's a there's a ton of conspiracies out there.
Oh yeah, tons.
So actually, to go back to your moon theory thing, So one thing I did forget to say, and I wanted to Another thing is is that there's a lot of people that think the moon is fake because you never see the moon change, so we always see the same side of the moon. It never turns in, yeah, to allow us to see the other side. And that's part of that theory I think, or part of the theory that the moon is fake is just so. Yeah,
I would like to explore that one more. If I could go somewhere, in all honesty, I would like to go to the moon. I heard something about the moon.
I'm on the moon right now. You could be there if you want.
I heard something about the moon being so far away that you could fit a whole galaxy in between us, or some shit like that. To look up the exact the exact information, but.
There well, also, speaking of the moon, people think that, uh that Apollo, what was it Apollo?
So yeah, there was another one.
Apollo seventeen was not the final, and then Apollow eighteen, the movie about Apollo eighteen is actually a real story that they just don't tell people because it ended tragically with them actually running into aliens on the moon. And I'm like, that'd be fucking dope, that'd be kind of cool. But then debate like why why keep everything so secretive?
You know, like you said, people know about the pyramids, right, If they really do know the all that shit, it's like, well what, because it's gonna cause mass panic, Like people have literally come out recently and said, no, Aliens are for sure real, Like you're at the point now that people are just like, okay, fuck it.
I So I think it's I think it's more than that. I think I think that there's there's so so so much more to it. I mean, I don't know in reality.
In reality, it's probably super simple. They just don't know, right, But my theory is that they know they know what it is, and there's so much more to it that it would cause it would genuinely cause questioning and panic and people would try and storm, try and storm you know, the pyramids to take over and figure out, and it would just cause hysteria in that way where people were trying to find out information, get steal things, you know, bombarred,
bombard the pyramid, and it would cause them to change focus from what they want, creating this just weird mass panic. And you'd have because we already have a lot of war in the world as is, and a lot of conflict in the world as is. But they can control it, right if if we, if we, as the people really wanted to, we could overthrow any government in this world. Well, in a harpie, In a harpy, it's it's the ant theory, right, It's the ant versus the cricket theory, right, or the
grasshopper theory. Like if the ants rise up, the ants can overcome any fucking.
Yeah, you're gonna lose a lot, but you're gonna overcome.
But you're gonna overcome. So and I and I think
that they know that. And I think whatever it is that that some of some of these conspiracy theories that are real, I think they would cause mass hysteria to that point where they would lose control and they don't want to lose control because that's what it's all about, right, It's all about control, of course, yeah, control, control, And to some to some people, they believe the theory that control is peace right, the ideology that control is peace yep,
if we are, if we are being controlled, then the piece is kept and people don't get out of don't get into too much chaos causing mass hysteria, pillaging, raping, plundering, that kind of thing. We fall back into a you know, dark ages kind of thing. But who knows, speaking of back into the dark ages. My other segment was TV shows, Yeah,
from when you were a kid. So I was thinking about this the other day because I was watching I want to say, it was that seventy show and I kind of caught some innuendos from red And during the show, and I was like, you know, I wonder how many shows as a kid we watched, you know, from like the ages of like ten to fifteen, and didn't realize
that there were these dirty jokes. Like there's a couple shows that I remember that I knew they were blatant and in your face, like ren and stimpy and married with children, right, even like like that seventy show King of Queen's was another one, right where these the you know, these shows had these jokes that were just in your face. But then there were other shows like Seinfeld Friends, Uh Sabrina the Teenage Witch was one of them, where like
the shows were less or the jokes were less obvious. Right, Full House had some where the jokes were just a lot less obvious. So what are some like, what are some of the shows that you guys watched as a kid, Like, what were you, like your top five from the ages of ten to fifteen?
I think first and foremost for me, it was WWE you know, WWF before it got changed over, but I had I'd really started watching it after it, like just after it got changed over. And so yeah, the whole the whole DX saga was just purely like suck it. I was like sucking. My parents were like stop, like what They're like, you have no idea what that means. I'm like, it's fucking Sean Michaels and Triple h. You know, that's so good.
You know, it's like screw you.
It's like screw you, Yeah, screw you exactly. And then later on I was like, oh.
Well, dude, I remember when women first came into wrestling, like with Sable and China and everything, and it was just all about sexuality and they I think it was Sable who did the desk scene with Vince McMahon in the middle of the ring. Am I right about that? Stacy Keeler, Stacey Keeler, Stacy Keeler. Yeah, she was like stripping in the middle of the fucking ring. Yeah, as dude,
that's wild, like to think. And you you watch wrestling now and it's so obvious, but back then, you you know, you didn't realize that Vince McMahon was turning it into this gigantic sexuality mess.
Sex sells. I have the two and and there. When you think of them now, they're blatantly obvious, but when you're like thirteen years old watching these, you catch some of the shit, but the other shit you don't catch. And then you get older and you rewatch it because there's still classics and still good. Uh. And the two that for me that I watched a lot then was
Futurama and Family Guy. Oh, and Family Guy was more blatantly obvious with their shit, but they still have a lot of shit that they do, like low key that as you get older, you you're like, Okay, that's like fucking hilarious, Like, well, yeah, they're shit that they advertise right up front, but then there's shit that they do on the backside too.
They they did a lot. They did a lot with like like low key violence or like suicide jokes, like like Steuwie Stuey had quite Stuwe had quite a few of them. Yeah, And then even some of the quagmire stuff wasn't it wasn't on the surface, Like there was a lot with quagmire that was just straight out there right in front of your face, like you said, But then there was a lot that was very underlined, undertoned.
Yeah.
Yeah, and one that was really popular at that age for us, for you and I don't I mean, it's banned for a long fucking time.
Uh.
And this was blatantly, blatantly obviously with south Park.
South Park.
Oh yeah, well that's what they that's what they were predicating their whole fucking aura or what's the word I'm looking for, persona, Like that's what they were about. They were proud of it. They were they were proud of being out there and in your face and making the obscene jokes and attacking people, you know, and they they didn't discriminate white, black.
Yellow, but you know, they went after everybody, no holds bar and everybody. One of my favorite moments was when they went to uh, the Oscars or the Emmys, think about being the Emmys, and they were dropping acid and they were in dresses. Uh, And they had to like go like talk to like and entertainment and all that, you know, and they have to give like full interviews and they're just tripping.
Balls on acid in dresses.
And I was like, fucking Trey Parker and that Stone, goddamn, goddamn. But I got into them definitely for sure. When it was like the mel Gibson Passion of the Christ era, that's when I got into it. It was still one of my favorite episodes. He just fucking starts shooting him and Chason.
Was that the same episode when the Devil showed up they did the Devil episode? Or was that shortly after.
They would have like Saddam Hussein on like a whole bunch.
That's what I was gonna go. And so the movie like this is how, this is how in your face? They went, Oh yeah, South Park, bigger longer and uncut. The movie, the first movie they came out for South Park. You have Saddam and Saddam Hussein and the Devil having a passionate relationship together him, very passion. Saddam was not dead yet. He was fun. It was like seven eight
years before his execution. So the fact that these guys had the balls to still do that shit and you're talking about like a fucking madman that's out there, like but they didn't care. They were like, we don't care.
He was probably in this cave laughing his ass off.
They had draw Muhammed a couple of times, and one of the times, Trey Parker said that he got there was like zero flak for it. And then like a couple of months later, he was traveling somewhere and like was visiting some place in Florida on vacation, and the news was breaking that there was like a bunch of people that were like super angry and thinking about getting radicalized, and he was like, I need to go home, like right now. Yeah, this shit's wow. Those boys are fucking wild. Yeah,
speaking of wild, wild boys. Yeah, there was everything that was fucking sexual about Jackass all the way through damn.
I always felt like they were up front. Maybe maybe by the time I started watching them, it was a little bit I was a little bit older.
So that was the point of Jackass was in your face, crazy nonsense like let's, you know, put mouse traps on our fucking wieners, like whatever whatever you can do to get the viewership and get the cringe, Like that's what they were gonna do.
Yeah, they were there for the shock factor for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember Fresh Fresh Prince of bel Air, and like how that that show hit two different buttons, right there were At the time, it was just funny to me. And then occasionally there would be this serious moment, right, the serious life moment that would happen, and the life lesson that would happen. But when you look back at some of those episodes, now there's a lot of dirty
shit in those episodes, you know. I mean, like there was one episode where like Will Smith's uh girlfriend, he ended up sleeping with her mom, like just right up and they're sleeping with her mom. And you know, at the time, you don't really think that that's a big deal, but now it's kind of like, oh shit, all right, that's different, and then the whole like the whole thing of him his dad being a piece of shit, and and you know, uncle Phil stepping in and being the dad for him.
Uncle Phil.
Yeah, that was a heart wrenching episode when I was a kid, and then you watch it now and it's even worse because it means more, you know, it means so much more.
Yeah, yeah, I agree with that.
I think Will's scene with Phil when they're talking about his dad after his dad laughed and Will was like so emotional. I It's still one of my favorite scenes of all time because it was just done so well.
Yeah, it really was. It was. It was heart wrench for sure. Yeah. Did you guys have any other any other shows that you remember?
No? No, I think I kind of touched like the ones that you said at the beginning. Yeah, I mean that was like my laundry list of shows as far as TV shows.
You know, Married with Children was fucking crazy. I remember my parents.
I was a little bit young.
Yeah. Yeah, well, I mean I'm older than you.
Yeah, I mean I remember watching it, but as far as my age level watching it, I was definitely not ten to fifteen yet.
Were there any shows that your parents wouldn't let you watch besides, you know ninety.
No, I don't think so Spice Channel. No, I don't think so, I'm trying to think. I do remember when I uh first rented Jay and Sam Bob Strike Back and the opening scene to that, and my mom comes over and starts cussing at me and shuts it off. She's like, why would you watch this fucking shit? Blah blah blah, And I'm like, there's literally I look right at her, so there's no difference in what you're acting
like right now versus what's on that TV. Yeah, you have said fuck the same amount of time that they have in the first minute. So she shut it off and then I watched it later that night after she went to bed.
But yeah, I did.
So it's you know, it's like that ship. But no, I never really had like I had friends that like they couldn't watch specific meanings. I got a buddy that he was not allowed to watch Ren and Simby he was not allowed to watch shows like that. So I don't know. I guess more lucky on the fact that I didn't have to deal with that kind of stuff.
Yeah, do you.
I was gonna say, there was one other show I had here that it was always been interesting to me because there was something off about I couldn't understand. And then when I got older, I went watched it again and I was like, holy shit, damn, this show's fucking deep.
It's Cowen Chicken, and Cowen Chicken was a you know, comic style cartoon back from the nineties, and it was about a chicken who had a sister that was a cow and she was younger than him, right, and the parents kind of looked normal, but they look like a cow and a chicken, and they're they're always trying to like best the devil in some way, and the devil is like super kind of weird, lusty and kind of provocative, you know, and like kind of sexual, you know, like
a lot of like butt cheeks and a lot of like parts they shouldn't show them, like very firtacious. You know. It's really weird. But I think what happened was is in this song, the song says, Mama had a chicken, Mama had a cow. Dad was proud. He didn't care. How so the mom fucked another dude and had cow who is not related to chicken except for the mom and it's pretty obvious when you see the two of them, and that's his worldview. His worldview is there's something wrong
about my sister. I don't know what it is, and it keeps presenting itself in different ways. In its lust is that her mom had cow outside of wedlock.
I never thought about it.
Yeah, that was the other one.
Cow and Chicken was like a more tamed version of Ren and Stimpy. Yeah, yeah, but it reminded me a lot of Red and Stimpy. It was just a little bit more tame, were a lot more I was gonna say.
At one point, Ren like spits in his hands and fucking rubs it on his nipples while he's got a saw for a penis.
Yeah, yeah, it was pretty It was pretty out there, in your face. I never got along with that show. I don't know. I was I'd never caught my attention, never wanted to watch it, but I watched it here and there.
I get it. I get it. I wasn't. I remember watching it, but I was not all about running Stimpy.
It's it was tough to get into Ian. I don't know. I also had a lot of mental problems as a kid, So.
It's funny you said had. I thought you said has, but I clearly heard a d in there.
I have. I have all kinds of the problems. What the fuck is that light? I just noticed a weird light in my room?
Mitchell's iPhone from the from the mirror before piece of duct tape hole.
It's one way nerror. It looks his way, but he can't be back. He's over there, just jerking it right now, just like, Yeah.
God, these guys are so fucking dumb. Right, he's listening to us like he's hacked into the server.
You just listened to us.
Good, Look, guys are fucking stupid. He was telling me. He was telling me that if the internet didn't work, that I could just go down there and he would lock up for me. And I'm like, but how do I lock up when I leave? Like I don't have a key?
Yeah? That that It kind of sounds like he's trying to traffic you maybe, you know, sounds like it's just a front for the state, for the safe house. What's his name? Mitchell?
Was Mitchell?
I might have I had had a Michael Michael, but it could have been a te I was high ship that day. Name tags are weird sometimes especially when they drawn like those stick symbols.
That Mike's in a government program.
Now.
His name is Mitchell and he's running a motel in Napa, California.
I'm gonna get these. I'm gonna get these, motherfucker on my fucking one.
I don't know this dude's like, he's like, the was the worst fucking worker, like every I So he offered me a discount already twice. And then there were people in here earlier who came in and they were complaining because their room wasn't ready, and he's like, what do you mean your room's not ready? I'm so sorry about that. He was super nice about it. He's like, I'm so sorry about that. What do you mean it's not ready? And they're like, well, it's it hasn't been cleaned. And
he's like, what, it hasn't been cleaned. The lady's like, yeah, no, it hasn't been cleaned. We got up there and the cleaning lady was in there, or the cleaning guy. She stead of cleaning guy was in there and he was cleaning the room while we were supposed to be in there. And he's like, so there was a sore's a guy in the room cleaning the room when you walked up, and she's like, yeah, I don't know if he was done or not. I just I didn't ask. I just turned around and came to you to tell you that
I needed a different room because it's not cleaned. And he's like, I'm so sorry. How about I give you a discount and I just put you in another room. I was like, fucking idiot.
It's too easy.
Literally, just fucking tell them to wait five fucking minutes. It's being It'll be done in five fucking minutes.
And he's trying to get his trying to get his yell reviews up. I'm gonna go give a review right fucking now in this place. Five stars for Mitchell. I've never even stated this place?
Can we can we do that real quick? I'll tell you what I will. If you guys give me two reviews right now, I will fucking put them up.
There, all right. I got mine all right, two out of five stars. Would have given it three out of five stars had it not been for the cockroache, just fingering my wife, not letting his finish. How am I supposed to get some peace and quiet? And this pigeon ship filled jacuzzi when I have to hear that douche canoe complain one more time about not reaching climax again, Like I don't hear it enough already.
I hear it every day from her Continental breakfast was superb.
By the way, bananas, Oh.
God, I love the bananasas.
Oh god, I love this job.
It's because I can't top that. That one's just going on.
Yelp, all right, done, done, done, and fucking done. Dude. You know I got to give him credit because I don't obviously don't have a printer here. I'm not gonna fly with a printer, and I've I've needed quite a bit of paper work printed out, so I've been asking him to print out paperwork.
You imagine you're on a plane and somebody just pulls out a fucking printer.
Tray. Excuse me, manmpled? I second, can you put can you put that down for me? Hand or a stapler? Be like, hey, can you stayplease while they come out? Please?
Office man on the go. Call an office man wherever you need to sign papers and print it out. He has a pen ready for you for your ink signatures.
Let's go, damn it, Janny you're supposed to tell me when I ran out of paper.
That's gonna be our new business officeman on the go. You need this print out? Here, you go, let me scan it for you. You look like one of those like uh, like that dude for fucking resimeval four with like the gun vest and ship. He's like, welcome, and you're just printers and pens and ship in your fucking trench coat with.
An absolute shitty pointless job to just walk into a bunch of places like Remax or fucking or anything like Chili's. You just walk into Chili's like, hey, you need you something printing out today? You need you need your invoices printed out today?
I got you the paper company. That's what I do.
You guys got Wi Fi?
I can't connect to my printer.
Can get the password?
Please?
Why do I have to lock up? I just want to scan something.
The chiliest password is I want my baby backs the second best capo.
Yeah all right, well yeah let's get out.
Yes, I gotta finish up some work and then go to bed. It's late.
Yeah, sad deuces bitches.
Later, she upgraded from the Mason jard to just drinking moonshine out of your fucking jug. Now you're one gallon?
Is that my one gallon?
That safety orange?
No, it's red. It looks I'm gonna hold it up like it's gonna make it any but it's red.
Oh we can see it. The colors come.
R yeah. Oh Jesus, hey, what's the difference between Usain Bolton Hitler?
You saying Bolton knows how to finish a race? A R m hmmm. Oh the speech, it was
The