Welcome to Dad's on day clok. Parental discussion is advised mature content Beyond this point.
You guys know, I needed a password, a new password, and they said it had to be eight characters long, so I picked snow white and the seven doors. I thought it was K E B L E R. No, No, it's a capital S capitol W dollar sign for seven dwarfs. And then the uh, the the W is actually just an inverted M. You just take your you just take your W and your keyboard and flip it over.
Wow.
Yeah, or mom, however you want to look at it.
It's true, it's true.
True. Uh, one sixty Dad's I dig with one sixty seven tonight? One sixty seven? Yeah, cool Dom, how much would you prepare for tonight?
Enough? More than you prepared that joke.
I didn't write the joke a joke right myself.
That was a disappointment.
This joke is longer than your notes for this tonight's episode, guaranteed, not true, guaranteedile, that's just the rundown. I said to you, what do you need? That's good ship? Anyway? How's your It's uh, we can't really talk. We could talk about Saint Patty's Day, which is tomorrow. But we did our Saint Pattis thing last week. Hm, we got murdered in jeopardy.
Yeah, my week was all right if you consider almost uh setting your house on fire shooting yourself good.
So you were like Jewish then you were hitler. It's like you got picked a little.
Yeah, you can't decide whether to die by fire or died by shooting. Squad, We're gonna do both, you know, you know, gas Launders, I just want to do that right now, Let's just do.
It Jesus Christ.
But not.
I uh. I found a leak in the roof, pretty bad leak. So been dealing with that. It's been fucking super fun anything no, no, luckily enough, Yeah, I'll be all right with that nonsense. But I took a little reprieve went up to the wall Pies because it was snowing up there last couple of days. So we took the kids. That was fun, had a good time sledding, watched Grace and Eat shit multiple times, but just laugh it off. So that was kind of cool. That been working like crazy.
Oh yeah, same, what about you?
Stone?
My week was pretty good. I finished up this stupid ass economics class with a bang. I spent the last two days writing a nine page paper and uh was just bullshitting through the whole way. And then when I got to the page nine, I was like, Oh, thank fucking god, the rambling worked. Get this ship out of here. I got four classes left and then we're done.
We're done. We're so fucking glass.
Avery had a pretty good week. She definitely had some allergies rolling, which sucks because like we just battled sickness and now she's coughing again. But luckily it's just from allergy, so it'll wrap itself up pretty quick here. But yeah, it's just all that fucking wind blowing through. It's just been nasty. But I mean it could be worse. It could be what's going on around the nation where there's fucking tornadoes, nail in some places.
Volcanoes would be worse.
Yeah, yeah, it could be a lot worse. Trailed train derailments. Have you guys seen that one the train to ailment that like just have them?
What was that last year? We had a couple of those around here two years ago?
Two years ago?
Was it two years ago? M hmm, Yeah, we had a couple of one that was real close, and then one that wasn't too far away from.
Us, back to back. Both of them were on the border of California and Arizona.
I had I was close to you, but were they both close?
They were both close. I had to drive by both of them to get to work. Yeah. One of them was pretty bad.
Yeah it was bad.
Yeah, it was a lot worse than what they even showed on the news. So it was pretty made a lot of clean up big time.
Yeah, what about you and know them?
That's good. Just whatever. Week, and then we ended up we towards the end of the week, we ended up getting the chickens that I spoke of last week. Yeah. So, and then Friday, it was cold and my son and I were putting the pen together outside and then it started snowing here and I was like, okay, so I guess we're gonna take a break. So it took a break from that, went into the garage and built the
coupe part, which was actually really easy. If I had to get another one, I would one hundred percent by this exact same brand. It was very very easy to put together. Hopefully it stays together, but that's another story. But yeah, so my son on spring break. So one of the other things I'm gonna have to do is is I want them to move all the rock that's where the pen is at, and so we can put down like wood chips, because those are easier to maintain than having to, you know, deal with your own rock.
Is the pen is the pen located on the side of the house where all the logs were, or is it on the opposite side.
On the opposite side, it's actually in the corner where the planter was.
Yeah, aka my back problems. Yeah, I get over there. I was picking you up to take because you had to do car off somewhere. And he's like, oh, help me move this real quick, and like a dumb ass, I was like, yeah, sure, why not. And it's his fucking planter that's full of dirt.
I mean it's not full full, but it felt like getting fucking four hundred pounds worth.
Yeah, they realized how many of those forty pound bags you put in there until you pick.
It up, it was.
It was heavy enough that like moving it, I could feel it in like my core, my back and you can feel it in your arms. Like later that day I was I think it was when I was doing the coop, I was turning the screwdriver and it hurt my forearms. And that was just for moving this planter about fifteen feet. It was bad. Yeah, it was bad. Yeah, thing well, that thing I do remember. It was heavy without anything in it, with all the wood. But then yeah, you're talking.
It's built out of two by fours. Yeah, there's like thirty fucking two by fours. Yeah, you know, sixty fucking feet worth the two by fours on that thing.
Yeah.
So yeah, but it'll be fun. We'll see, we'll see what happens. But yeah, So the chicks are actually uh in a We converted a big tote in the like one of those home depot black totes with the yellow lids, and then I cut the top, put some chicken wire and then we have the lamp on that. So they're just hanging out in there and they'll be there for as they get a little bigger, we can take them outside during the day. They're still just way too small,
so probably a couple weeks away from doing that. So what do you need though?
Uh, I got some hard candies sitting on my fucking table because I got harburn.
Okay, but I want to know what they were. It sounds delicious, sounds like a rope beer barrel.
So they're kind of the same thing, but they're.
I don't know, you can't really see them drugs.
Yeah, they're edibles. They're hard candy edibles.
Okay, okay, right, yeah.
They're they're for this German brand and they're different food.
The gem is still taking just.
Out five mills each one. I've had three so far, So we'll see how we go.
All right, all right, uh damn. Like so so like normally people go to like space, you know, they go to Mars and they get super high. But do you go to purgatory? Like where do you go?
I stay right here? Purgatory.
This is fucking it's a funny name for a concentration camp.
Purgatory. That's the Okay, that's the next the next segment. Well we'll say funny names for fucking so okay, hear me out. Though they already kind of have funny names, just like Auschwitz. Like Auschwitz, it's a funny fucking name.
Dude.
You can't tell me that that doesn't sound.
But that's a lot of German. A lot of German names sounds funny, and I think is it is it that the it could be a double edged story. I was gonna say, is it the name that's funny or how it's pronounced because they're dialect there, you know how they.
Sound nothing funny. Everything sounds dangerous. Everything in German sounds angry. So I think that what they did was they tried to name things that sounded pleasant to trick people, like, oh, you're going to Auschwitz, Like okay, that sounds like a fucking brought worst want to get food.
Every time Arnold Schwartznigger talks, I feel like at the end of it, he's gonna say, nah, just kidding, I kill all of you, like just some crazy because like he's just so charismatic, right, and like you get those like those Austrians and those like uh Eastern Germans, and they have just that charismas swagger. But you just you feel like it's like Christof from Glorious Bastards, right, you just know at the end of it, he's gonna fuck
somebody up. And I've always felt that about about Arnold, is that he's just gonna come in at the end and just be like, now I'm about to kill you just kidding, just kidd.
All I heard was that AJ wants Arnold to play Hitler.
Could you imagine? Could you fucking imagine it? Ripped sun, It's a fucking sharpie mustache. Now guilded juice and lift him.
Put that drew down now, Jingle jingle.
Have you guys seen his Netflix doc It's pretty interesting, like where he grew up and he actually grew up under U his dad, who was like a high ranking SS officer, and he hated his dad so much and was like he's just a Nazi dastard. Fuck that guy. And then he went to the US. He made it so big over here, and.
It's just a big Could you imagine if instead of here he went to Canada Instead, Arnold becomes a mayor or governor of like fucking Manitoba.
It's instead of putting on mud in the Predator, he just puts on plaid maple syrup covers.
Bapel syrup and.
He comes out in a mounty outfit riding a moose covered in maple syrup. I'm great, great.
Instead of all right, instead of trying to find Turbo Man, he's trying to find the action figure from Toy Story of his counter reeves.
He's trying to find the last Tim Morton's coffee and so he's trying.
To open.
Suckers.
Okay, well this is actually that perfect into the the next topic we're gonna do. So we've done those things you can say in bed and blah blah blah. Well I was requested by a Canadian to bring up things you could say in bed and in Canada, and I thought this is gonna be a lot easier at first. And then I wrote stuff down and I took it out. And I wrote stuff down and I took it out. We could do round robin. So Stone, let's go Stoned
you then me than domb and we'll just go. I said to bring like three, So what do you got Stone?
First one?
I'm about to end next to this pussy.
All right, Just what's your favorite tariff?
It too?
Mm hm oh ship? Okay, all right, Sorry, I tried my best day.
It almost got Australia like clubs.
I'm gonna give you my first. I'm just gonna give you three, my three. I'm so sorry. I'm very sorry. Oh my please forgive me. There's that's that's all you say. It's Canada. All right, now give you them my real one? Man, May I please smash your beautiful hole.
A jumping Joe Holsifer. That's a big moose.
Knuckle. Moose knuckle?
Does that look like potin to you?
Bud? Please allow me the pleasure of making love to you.
A you ready to drill oil their bud? Well, that guy creamed harder than my Tim Horton's maple iced coffee there, Bud.
Jesus, what a nice doughnut hole you have there.
I've never been to RB's before, but there's the first time for everything.
Eh.
You know exactly where the beef is we all know. Mm hmmm mm hmmm.
I didn't have anymore, only had three. You do you have more honorable mentions? You could just keep saying sorry, Yeah, I did put sorry but that.
Uh I go around the back of Tim Horton's to get my maple bars. Now.
Have either of you ever tried Tim Hortons?
Uh?
No, No, but I haven't either. You know, it looks it looks like basic, like fucking Duncans or or Dutch bros. Like, it doesn't look like anything special, like it just looks like fufu bullshit. But they have them in hockey arenas across the United States, so like I've seen them when going to a Coyotes game or when I've been to T Mobile Arena, but I've never actually had Tim Hortons because I'm less.
You do know that doggy style was invented in Canada, right, It's so that both people can watch hockey while they're fucking.
It's true, that's true.
Facts.
We had it first in America, though. We adopted it watching NASCAR, and they caught on and started doing for hockey.
And then somebody said, bow, wow, well your pop I.
Thought that's where reverse cowgirl came in from.
Well it didn't come from Alabama.
No, reverse calgirl from No.
Because you don't turn your back on your family. Oh it's good, all right, Well I got I brought something new to the table for this one. We you know, we always talk about dad stories and have funny things to say and shit to do. But I want to bring the dark side of parenting, not too dark, but
I guess however dark you want to get. But I said, we each need to bring some stuff about Like could be stories about advice about dues and don'ts to people listening that may be new to parenting, not new to parenting, aren't a parent yet, but maybe they're gonna be one. Just some examples that you might want to give of shit that you didn't realize. Like me, one of my top ones would be shit you didn't realize of having a teenager and a toddler in the same fucking house,
and like, don't do that. I'm not wishing that to anybody. Don't ever accidentally have somebody as a kid and then sixteen years later, plan to have a kid and the two meet up at seventeen and four in your household, and there's a whole lot of personality and you're just like, you have nothing. It's just wild. It's like the wild West around here. Oh, beat the shit out of both at all times.
I think it's fucking hilarious because one of them is trying to avoid you and the other one is begging to have your attention. Yeah, right, at all fucking times.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And like when I came over the other day, Like you guys say that Ellie talks about me all the time, and she says stuff about me all the time, but then I show up and she is scared to fucking death. Of me.
Yeah, the other night I got her in the I got her in the bath and I was getting her hair tie out and it got stuck, and so when I yanked it, it took out a little bit of hair. Hair, and she was just like, ah, She was like, did you take out hair? Am I gonna look like Josh, to which I chuckled.
So yeah, of course, yeah, dude. I was dire when Lily set me that. Or uh, when I was taking that snapchat with Lily and I put that filter on and she goes, hey, I look at Google Jordan.
I was like, I was just a picture. I was just like, do I look like some fucking brocast Mexicans. It's on Matthew something. I don't understand the reference here. I don't know the reference nothing like you.
It was just because of the mustache.
Yeah, fucking a was that? Did you guys take that picture in the mountains?
Yes?
That makes more sense because I was gonna make fun of your fucking hat and I was like, it ain't that cold outside. But now, like now knowing that you're in the mountains makes more sense. I don't want to get a sunburn, you know, up in the elevation.
Dude, it was so bright, having all that that white snow everywhere.
It was so fucking bright.
One of the worst, one of the worst sunburns I've ever had was in uh It was like a high of forty eight degrees and I was at a football game up in Reno for you and R and you and LV, and you don't even think about it because you're like, it's forty nine degrees outside and I'm fucking baked on the stands baked.
It was. It was brad because there were no clouds.
There, pure sun and off the aluminum and shit off the stadium too. But Stone, what do you got? Stories wise? What do you got for us?
One of them I got is, you know, like when your kids get sick and you literally have to baby the shit out of them and kind of like no matter what age up until he gets like maybe fifteen sixteen some around there, you know. But like when kids get sick, you're like, oh shit, like a massive monkey
wrench gets thrown into the engine. And you know, just from personal experience, like just having as much patient patients as like humanly possible, and just like tell yourself at the end of the day that like you're doing the best you can, like keeping them alive and getting them better, and don't don't you get frustrated that you can't get
them better faster. It's just something like that just has to take its time, you know, with medicine and everything else, and just be patient with it and roll with it and just be there and love your.
Kids days for everything you got stomach seven to ten days, motherfucker buck love.
Yeah, it's such a wild thing, right because it's like to say that you're doing such a good job at keeping them alive. Like I think that's the part that most people fail to understand with being a parent, is that you are responsible for keeping this human, this living thing alive. It's not like a dog. Like you can forget about a dog for a day and it'll be fine. You cannot forget about your kid for ten minutes, like at all. You just can't. Sometimes they won't let you,
but you really can't. Like and and getting sick was kind of on mind, like them constantly being sick was online And it takes so much energy because you can't stop, Like you still have to figure out how to go to work, You still have to figure out how to cook and clean and do all the house things and chores and life things that you have to do while still taking care of this human that now can't take care of themselves at all, whether they're four or seventeen,
Like this switch just it shuts off period. When these kids are sick, it's it's tough. It's it's a tough one to deal with. And when you have more, when you have more, when you have multiple, it's inevitable that it's going to go from one person to the next because you can't get away from each other.
It's like the pin of a grenade. We're all going down.
Yeah, Like what do you do?
You send them to a fucking hotel room. You're like, all right, number one, you're gone, go to fucking motel six down the street. I'll see in a couple of days it's already packed. We got room two ten on fucking reserve. Get the fuck out of the house.
Yeah.
Well, I mean because by the time somebody gets sick, it's already it's already hit everybody. It just hasn't Yeah, it just hasn't manifested yet, especially.
Like when they're little, when they're little and they're running around everywhere and they're touching everything and blowing the nose and everything, and sneezing everywhere and coughing everywhere. There's no hiding it.
You know, when my kids are so resilient when they're little, like you can have no clue that they're really sick, truly hits.
That's Grayson, Grayson, Grayson, unless he is like on his fucking deathbed, you do not know that that kid is sick. You'll see little glimpses here and there, but then he just gets up. He's like, I'm fine, I'll be all right, and he just keeps on trucking.
Calli.
When Calli's sick, her whole fucking world shuts down. She is like she is pamper me, take care of me, make me food, don't touch me, don't fucking come near me. I want hugs. What are you doing? I'm gonna take a shower. Why are you telling me to get out of the shower. I've only been here for an hour and a half. What the fuck is your problem?
Like, dude, it's just say she was on her period or the same thing.
Dude, it's it's it's wild and and that like that's another thing too that most people don't realize is that each kid has its has its own personality, right, but when they are sick that changes drastically.
Period.
That kind of goes into one of my other ones, though that I wasn't ready for, is feeling like you're not wanted or like they want nothing to do with you. I don't think anyone can ever really prepare a parent for that emotion, for that like that form of hurt. Yeah yeah, right, Like I'm at that stage now with the two girls where they just get these moments where
they want nothing to do with me at all. It's nothing personal, it's nothing I've done now, it's not even that, it's just that they don't they don't want the type of relationship that I bring to the table. They don't want they don't want me. They don't want their dad, they don't want my love. They want the connection, they
want the fun that somebody else brings. And it took me a minute to really kind of like put it on there because for a while I was away right for work, and so every day when we would talk, it's I miss you, I love you, I want to see you, like I can't wait till you come home.
We're gonna do so many fun things, and then you come home and there's five minutes of entertainment and then they're like, all right, fuck off, mm hmm bye, Like I want to go be with my friends, I want to go do this with mom, or I want to go do this, or I want like they just it's not. The relationship that I have with them is reserved for very specific moments and they still come to me, but it again, it just takes a very specific moment for that connection to be there.
Well kind of like I said I said earlier about how having a split of like a you know, a toddler and what an infant and a toddler and then a teenager, you're three years away from having three teenagers in the same roof. That's gonna be a disaster. Like, like nobody wishes that on anybody, you know, like I have. You know, I'm ten years or so away from having two teams. Yeah, you're three years away from having three teams at the same time.
Like that it's gonna be rough. Yeah, because they also fight a lot.
Yeah, that's a sibling that's a sibling thing, you know.
Yeah.
I feel like the more they fight, the stronger the bond. They build with each other.
I fucking hope so, man, because little dude Lily. Lily and Grayson are gonna be They're gonna be unfucking matched with their bond by the time they get over because they are so mean to each other.
But can you imagine like if some like person were to like, you know, mess over Lily and like Lily's upset about what they had done to them, and then Grayson goes and just beats the ship.
Oh yeah that does happen, now, Yeah, that that does happen. Now he is very protective over her, and she is very protective over both of them, you know, Callie and Grayson. I mean, we've seen it numerous times before.
But is Calli just like pretty neutral?
She she she is the oldest, and she does not like confrontation. She does not like conflict, She does not like the arguing, she doesn't like the fighting. She none of it. And she will do whatever she can to resolve it as quickly as possible because she just doesn't she can't handle it. So we're working on that. So what I do is I just argue with her for no fucking reason now, just to teach, just to like teacher,
how to deal with it. You know, I'll just be not not like in a in a dick like dick kind of way, just it just like a pokey, you know, fun kind of way. There's only been one time where she was wrong. She was actually very wrong. We were sitting at the kitchen table. She was very wrong, and she wanted to continue to have an argument, and I went, okay, listen, if you want to have an argument, we can do this. Like I'm willing to step away and concede that we're
not going to agree. We're not going to see eye to eye on this. Right now. There's a bunch of people around. So do you just want to cut your losses and and stop or do you want to actually have a debate, like do you want to go back and forth? And she was like, no, no, I want to have a debate. I want you to prove me wrong, make me, make me see you're side of it. And I said, okay, fine, but if you end up walking away crying, you can hate me, like you can't be
angry at me, you can't like you. You you are asking for it. Right now, I'm telling you that this is a very dangerous road. Dad acts dumb all the time, but when it comes down to it, if I need to, I will get into a debate with you, and I will be very good at it. And sure, shit, dude. It took like five maybe seven minutes, and she was in tears, and she walked away, and I looked around the table and I asked everybody. I was like, did I do anything wrong? And they're like, nope, I think what happens?
Did I do anything wrong? With One of the things that come in and realize is, you know, because you can't escape genetics, no matter what right, you can't escape genetics, and you are who you are, and you're likely going to be a lot like your parents in a lot of different ways because it's just genetics. And as you grow older, finding out how much you can't fucking stand yourself. Yep, you know what I mean, because that's your early twenties
right there. Your kids are you, your kids are you, and you see it coming out and you're just like, I fucking hate every moment of this.
Every time I call my mom, I'm like, hey, Mom, just to get it out right here right now, in the beginning to call I'm sorry for being a cunt when I was a kid. My bad, My bad.
You shouldn't apologize. That's her fault.
She chose to keep you there.
That's her fault.
She taught you the funk.
We just talked about genetics. It's her. You got that from her. Four Oh it is a leaf.
Oh my god, in my blood.
It's your brother. Well, we kept him, so we kind of have to keep him, right, You got one more stone?
Yeah, how to prepare your kid for unexpected loss? There's no real way to do it, kind of no matter what age they're at, it just happens. And when it happens, you just have to be there for them as much as you can to help them through the process of it, but also know that you can't control.
It, you know, be the definition of unexpected.
Yeah.
No, I I like that topic because it's I don't know what I I don't know. I mean, you don't know, uh what somebody else wants, right, But for me personally, like I didn't have to deal with really unexpected loss from the age of seventeen until like five years ago, So I I, you know, I had a pretty big window of not having unexpected loss of close you know, close people, and but you know, whereas like my son, you know, he at a younger age, has had to deal with unexpected loss, and so I think it might
be easy. It would be my perspective, because of going through what I went through, I feel I could be easier to have it at a younger age than going such a long time without having unexpected loss until you're actually older. And to me, it's harder to deal with because you're not used to dealing with it.
I can see coming coming from my side of it, where matter I had a lot of I had a
lot of unexpected loss as a younger. As a younger kid, you you don't really feel it when you're younger, like it doesn't hit you the same because even though I was close to like just for like my uncle's right, I was close to both of my uncles that I lost at a very young age, but it didn't register the same way that it did when my grandparents died at an older age, because when I was younger, it was just like I had so much going on, like my brain, My brain was so consumed with other things
that I could distract myself from it. It was easy enough to almost put it out of like out of my mind, and just ignore it almost like a little bit versus when I was older and my grandparents, both my grandparents died, I knew what that meant instantly that I was never going to see them again. Whereas at a younger age, I went through periods where I didn't
see my uncles. So it was kind of like all right, like you just kind of fall back into the habit of Okay, I'm just going through my daily routine again, where you know what I mean. But but with my grandparents, yeah, when they passed, I I was devastated. I mean, you know, I was close to both of them, and it was hard.
You know, when my dad died, the same thing. You know, my dad died, I was excuse me, it's twenty one and twenty two, and it was it was rough, you know, all of those emotions like he's never gonna get to see his grandkids, He's never gonna to see me grow up. Like I was still I still felt young at that age. You know, I was like, there're so yeah, there's so much that's going to happen in life that I am now not going to have my father for you know.
True, it's true. It makes it makes I don't know, it makes it tough, you know, Like I just think, like the how you touched on it at a young age, you kind of just move on because you have so much shit going on, and like, yeah, as an adult, you have a lot of shit going on too, but it just doesn't hit you the same. Like I feel like if I was seventeen and lost one of my grandparents, I wouldn't feel the same of like because I'd be
so busy. I wouldn't feel the same of like, oh, you know, I wish I could text my grandma or call my grandma. Yeah right, Whereas now it's like still you know times where I'm just like go to pick up the phone like oh I should, well no it doesn't really work, and you're.
Closer to it, yeah, like like we're we're closer to it now in this sense of like actual yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that makes sense.
I do.
That kind of leads into what my my last one was, which is to remember that as you're having kids, Like this is for anybody who hasn't had kids yet or anybody who is just starting to have kids, try and understand that you're still learning whilst the while teaching these kids. That you're having Like, you guys are going to be learning things in life at the same time, different parts of life, Like this is the first time I've ever been forty two. This is the first time that I've
ever had a job. No, correct, this is the first time that I've ever had a job like I have now, you know what I mean. Like, I'm like, this is a I've never been divorced before. Right now, I'm still I'm still dealing with with aspects of my life that I never thought i'd have to deal with, and I'm trying to figure it out, all while still dealing with teaching these kids how to be who you know they want to be. And so that's one thing that nobody
told me. Nobody, nobody shined a light on the fact that when you are having kids, you are still going to be growing up. You are still going to be learning life, figuring shit out, You're still going to be learning things for the first time. That never dawned on me until probably about two three years ago.
Usually that makes sense.
And to add on to that, you're you're still going to be like messing up at things as a parent, and it's up to you to like learn from it, have accountability and move on, move forward better, Like, don't sit here and think you're not gonna suck up.
You're not gonna so many wrong things.
Oh yeah, and you and you'll continue to Yeah.
I like it.
That's a good ship.
All right, Let's move to the next thing. I'm gonna do a little switcheroo with the last topics and we're gonna do in the in the theme of its March. And today actually is the announced they announced the bracket for March Madness. I filled mine. Now I haven't watched a single fucking college basketball game this year yet. Uh, but I filled out my bracket and I'm just like, this is what's gonna happen. And so I went through it, and I didn't think a whole lot of on it.
You know. I feel like I feel like the less time you spend when you the more you over analyze it. You're just like, I can't see these teams up setting. You have to know there's going to be at least one twelve seed that wins. There's going to be probably two ten seeds that wins. Stuff like that. But this topic has nothing to do with March Madness other than it's a bracket. But I thought of this from last week.
It sparked my mind as I was editing a video and seeing how fucking high I was last week, So I thought it would be fun to do a bracket of I found sixteen. You know there's these things called a You could mute yourself there is oh man.
Enough and then you tried to say mute Mike as you pressed none.
Of us can fuck. That was on purpose. I did mine on purpose.
I couldn't get to it quick enough.
Yeah, if you thought it was gonna go one when your mind, but the playback like watching it.
Live, like it's like sneezing through a screen door.
Oh shit, dude. Grayson did that the other day. He was cooking fucking food and he had to sneeze. He was standing over the he was standing over the frying pan and he had to sneeze, and he goes like this, yeap, just like this. He brings it up to above his nose. He goes.
Right in the fucking food, the fucking food.
I was like, just stir that ship up, dude, nobody will know.
It.
By turn it up, nobody will know. It's just you and I I was like, next time just look the other way. He like, don't sneeze over the wood, just look the other way. So uh, anyway, March Madness bracket.
So I made a bracket, and I thought it'd be fun to go over of they pen specifically weed pen names, because a lot of people like to use little special names for these things. So I came up. Now, I came up personally. I found most of these. Some of them that I thought I came up with, I still found. So I'm like, I'm clearly not the first person that's thought of this.
I am sure that the party very late to the party, very late to the party.
And I'm so glad that you clarified because when I read this, when you typed it up and sent it to us and I read it, I thought we were going to be smoking all of these trains and then talking about which ones we liked, I was fucking. I was done. I was like, no, we're not doing this.
Don't worry about northern lights, guys.
I got my own.
Yeah, I am not. I am not going down that road. I was. I was scared. I would have done it.
You're like, I mean I would have done it. But I'm glad this is what it was.
You're like, I don't want to do that. Drops twenty milligrams.
I'm fifteen deep right now. All right, so starting to kick in.
Yeah, you guys, getting a little.
Wrap this episode up so you can pass out.
Yeah right, I'm gonna wake up. I'm gonna wake up with my fucking freezer door open, everything melted.
You're just sitting a half eaten pack Grand Beef.
That's raw, and you're like, I'm gonna die. Okay, let's get this ship on the road, all right.
So first matchup. I just edited this so I had no clue what the matchups were until I started our first matchup of the best weed pen name.
That ship right there, they're getting hard to control, no ship, wind it up.
The texts are coming out, dude. First matchup Osama Pen Laden Jesus first Pen and Stimpy Pen and Stimpy. I want to take a hit of my pen and Stimpyer. I want to go visit take.
Penny Stimpy because that ship is just that's raunchy.
Okay, Stone, I got a nine to eleven year idea right there, Bud, I'm going, yeah, that's.
Right, and decide.
I gotta go near and dear to my heart, I do love the Osama pen laden one, but I'm gonna go with Pen and Stimpy. I'm gonna go Pen and Stimpy. I don't know if I wouldn't be mad, I'm not gonna of them. There is not a name on this sixteen name list that I would not be mad about winning. They're all one seed. Okay, all right? Next match up the pen commandments versus Penn and Teller. They both do magic.
I'm gonna go Pen Commandments because fucking Moses went up to the burning bush, tripped and saw and ship and they came back down and went yo.
For real, nobody's brought that up. What if the burning bush was that caused the whole thing? We're about to get shut down?
That's what they've been saying the last like twenty years. Like theologians are like, we actually think he might have stumbled into a wheat bush that was on fire. They grew a lot around there, the Afghan cush oh o g.
What do you got?
Their domeut stems over there?
We're in round one. Pen commandments versus Penn and Teller's fucking lunch Pen commandments?
What the commandments?
All right? One tough matchup here.
You know what they heard because somebody blessed that with holy Water.
Tough matchup coming up for you, Stoned. Yeah, I feel I feel your pain on this one. Yeah, we're gonna get a little hit of the pent Tara Or do we want to go take a little trip with the eggs Penedict? Oh, you bastard.
I want a little eggs penedict for breakfast.
I want Jordan to decide this one. I'm gonna go Pensera.
Oh no, I'm gonna eggs Penedict. Okay, next matchup, good old one of the ogs that I've ever heard of. This take a little hit of the pen Griffy Junior. Are we gonna put our little kite in the sky and go for some Benjamin Franklin, Because it's.
Because it's pen pen Griffy Jr. Like it's like, come on, it's near and dear to my heart?
And so is that what you're choosing?
Yeah? Because I can't pronounce the other one? All right, I say, Benjamin Franklin.
Yeah, are you sticking Grify Jr.
Yeah?
As the smoothest fucking swing I've ever seen in baseball. Talk about hitting right to your fucking head pen Griffy Jr. Next up, Penry Cavill versus Penzel Washington.
I think it's gonna be Penzel Washington.
Yeah, okay, yeah, okay, all right, yeah, alright, no little uh Henry Cavill in the winter. Okay, uh. This one's one of my personal favorites. Pennis Rodman versus John F. Pennedy.
I just imagine why would they not pronounce it like penis? And then I admittedly realized there's two ends?
Why. I was like, did you purposely say it like that? Kid just said penis?
Wells?
Pennis colored penis?
You know that dude, fucking bleach is a tip of it?
At what point? At what point did this guy think it would be a smart I need to have by Milligram Candy sitting in a bag next to him while recording.
I love how you were fucking obliterated last time, and now it's the both of us.
No, the dome is Yeah, what I need an answer? We got to move on here, Penis Rodman, So we're going with John F. Pennedy.
Yeah, oh yeah, blow your mind, blow your brains out.
Yeah, all right, next matchup, take me away, Elton John on the Piano, Penny and the Jets versus Pendolina Joe.
I'm gonna say, yeah, Pendu.
Yeah, one of my personal favorites.
Some of the greatest tits I've ever seen.
What Next matchup? Last matchup? First round, we got pen Stiller versus Obi Wan Penobi pen Stiller is too long, It's a little too much. Yeah, it's way too all right.
I would have I would have loved pen Kenoby Penny.
That would have worked. But pen still pen.
Didn't even think of that. Now, there's so many all right, I'm sure somebody, millions of people have already thought of that. All right, Second round, let's go Pen and Stimpy versus the pen Commandments.
Penn commandments.
Yeah, okay, big commandments. It is all right. Next matchup, Oh tough one again, Eggs Pendedict versus Penn Griffy Jr.
Pen grif.
Sorry, I had to make sure my foot was still there. I know, but like five minutes ago, I thought I was breeding really hard breathing.
Still apparently still thought we were trying all the strains tonight and that.
All right.
Penzel Washington versus John F. Pennedy.
I'm gonna go Pencil Washington, John F.
Pennedy.
I like John F. Pennedy. That's moving on. Uh, Pendelina Joe Lee. Last matchup versus Penn Stiller.
Penn Stiller, Penn Stiller.
All right, yeah, I did.
Not see him moving on that far. But that's I love it. I'm here for it.
All right.
We got the Pen command Oh these are good matchups. Jesus the Pen Commandments versus pen Griffy The Pen Commandments.
Oh, I gotta go with Penn.
Dude, Like, oh, my eyes hurt so bad?
Did you cut any jlapenos or anything tonight?
What did you cut.
Like any like jlapenas or like any spicy stuff and forget it's on your hands? Okay, good, I've done that before. Well high and that sucks.
Honorable mention to the Pen Commandments. But pen Griffy Jr. Is moving on. Last matchup of the final four, John F. Pennedy versus Penn Stiller. Oh yeah, wow, okay, and we have the wee Penn finale, one of the ogs versus one that I never thought of till I found it on the list. Pen Griffy Jor Versus Penn Stiller.
Pe Griffy Jr. You gotta swing for the fences, baby fuck classes just kidding them?
What you got for Stone?
That's hard?
Hm hmm.
I love both of them.
They're great. I think I gotta go Pen Griffy is the winner.
Okay.
I actually would have chosen Penn Stiller only on the fact that when I think of Penn Stiller, I think of his character of White Goodman from Dodgeball, like just all hyped up an antsy and John. Yeah, that's it, Okay, Okay.
I want to say something though, if if if there was ever a strain that I would want, it's a Penn Stiller like strain. Do you know what I mean? Like, if you take all of Ben Stiller's comedic genius, all of his what do they call all of his characters the characters thank you thanks. If you take all of the characters and put that into a high that'd be phenomenal.
That's true, because you you mean one of them, you get Tony Perkins and White Goodman would basically be the same on a high high end of sativasa.
Right.
Yeah.
And then you have Hal l He's a hybrid, the guy from uh from Happy Gilmore. Yep, he's a hybrid. Like you don't know what you're gonna get.
You can get a batch like something about Mary Ye dude, yeah, or Walter Mitty where you get super fucking intense.
Mm hm.
You would get the guy where he's the cameo of a guitar center for and that's straight like just get you all tricked out and like take you down the road.
Change my answer.
No, it's Pegraffy.
Damn. I almost went pen Stellar And I was like, but like, if you caught me a different day, I probably would have went pen Stellar.
There were so many great.
Ones at ones. The JFK one was good. Yeah.
Yeah, So there it is. Pengraffy Jr. Is the winner we probably got. Are you gonna make it?
Though?
Mm?
You go right to bed, right right to the fridge.
Take three more at area.
Get you.
Where'd you get him at?
You look at the bag, like, what where'd you get him at? California?
Yeah?
Okay, justlick the microphone like a fucking cat. Oh my goodness. Okay, So we have a couple of minutes and the other thing we were gonna do don't probably won't be able to partake because reading is probably gonna be pretty difficult for him, right, at the moment, but we were gonna do some dad reviews where we read, Oh no, we're.
Good, I got a good one.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, mm hmm.
Okay this dude, Oh god, damn it, I had a good one. Hey, yeah, sure you okay.
You're like looking at usl weird man.
Mm hmm.
I got a good review. Are we doing reviews or not?
We're doing reviews.
Go you got it, all right? So this one, this one's for. This one's by Daniel. It's from twenty fourteen. It's a little old, but it's a good one. Okay. It's about wall charger, a USB wall charger, light up four port travel AC power adapter charger hub with interchangeable plug. Daniel says, my wife and I can now charge all of our devices simultaneously. Now all we fight about is her crippling alcoholism and my unhealthy obsession with the code of faming.
I love it. It's good. It's good. I got a quick, quick round robin of a couple, real quick. They're fast.
One.
I substitute the pumpkin puree for apple cider vinegar and it tasted awful. One star reply. Hey, I definitely would not recommend using apple cider vinegar in this recipe. So sorry you didn't enjoy this. Just to be clear, you gave this recipe a one star because you substitute of vinegar in the place of pumpkin puree that the recipe calls for. No one would ever think the vinegar would be a great substitute for pumpkin. Next comment, no shit, that's good stuff we got stump.
Brandon gave this company a one star, and he said, I had this guy come over to fix my toilet, and upon meeting him, he almost immediately was hitting on me and asking if I liked men with a micro penis. I assured him I was heterosexual and politely asked him to stop trying to touch my dick. Being a non judgmental kind of fellow, I left him to do his work, and when I came back, he had taken a giant shit in my toilet and he left it. But that's
not where it gets bad. He then abruptly stormed out, but as he was leaving my house, he threatened my children, both eighteen months years old with special needs and earned wheelchairs. He then kicked the shit out of my puppy, hopped in his work vehicle, rolled down the window and threw out a bunch of plastic straws and shouted, fuck the sea turtles. Very bizarre, especially since we don't live anywhere close to the ocean. Apparently he's been violent with children recently,
and I'm not surprised. I don't think I'll ever be using Jhurol plumbing ever again.
Damn nice, you got another one down.
Microwave for one by Sonya Allison three stars on Amazon. It's a book. Buy this book or don't. I don't care anymore. Michael Pamulis says, it used to be that I got home from work and the only thing I'd want to put in my mouth was the cold barrel of my grandfather's shotgun. Then I discovered Sonya Allison's chicken tittizini, and now there's two.
Things, so I like it.
That's a good one. Speaking of Grandma, this is this is great one star one star review for this recipe. So my grandmother was born raised in Yorkshire, and I am used to her recipe. I wanted to make the real Yorkshire pudding, but couldn't find my family recipe, so I came to this in a pinch and what a disappointment refrigeration. My grandmother didn't even have a refrigerator as a young girl growing up in Yorkshire. What a complete joke.
Bitch got mad? Left a one star because as we refrigerated, what do you got stone?
This guy named Edward gave this place five stars. He said this place has great views. However, the wind was so strong that when I urinated, the stream pushed back into my face. Writing this hours later, I can still taste it. Five stars.
You got one more dumb he's looking for one.
I like he was accountable, you know, still give it five stars. Didn't blame them just I think when that's the key with the stars. You see so many times that people give stars that aren't aren't related. Like I've seen people leave great reviews like solid product, would recommend, loved it and they give it like three out of five stars, and you're like wait what yeah, or the reverse Everything did exactly what it was supposed to do.
I just didn't like it one star, or or they review like the place right, not the product, but oh this place was a shit show. I'd never go back. One star.
Well what about the product? You left this for a product not for a store. Tell me about the product. Oh five out of five love it? You got another window?
Large wood cutting board from Canadian maple a five stars. Such hardwood. This wood is so hard it makes me feel insecure. They're a boot that uh travisms travism al.
Right, my last one. One star. Not a great place to live. Dusty and dirty, with nothing to do, lots of homeless and drugs, no jobs. The schools are horrible. The people drive like idiots, speeding and running stoplights. Walmart is the local shopping mall. Medical is super bad. He can't even get in for six months, and forget about a specialist. Hotter than hell in the summer and windy all other times of the year. Would not recommend living here. As a one star review for king in Arizona, Yeah.
The new Kingman got voted as the worst city in fucking Arizona.
Really, Butler, the one that's uh, excuse me, the one, the one that's right above that is also a one star. Yuck, just yuck. Dirty town full of druggies and plain nastiness. City smells like weed. Californians are like roaches and have been fested everywhere kid.
Vegas.
Yeah, it's so good.
Vegas is getting bad.
Vegas is getting it's been bad.
No, it's getting worse.
Everywhere's getting worse. Covid in the exodus of Californians to other places, and obviously the close proximity are gonna get hit the hardest. And then you know, so you have a lot of Washington, Nevada, Arizona, and then it's like Texas in Colorado, a lot of eastern Montana or western Montana as well. So fucking everybody watches Yellowstone like let's go be a cowboy, went gift?
Fuck fuck that show.
Yeah you all right, don't you gonna make it?
No, I'm gonna puke, all right, that's.
On DIACO episode one sixty seven. Dome, I'm out ate too much.
Weed, he said, God damn dude.
I was gonna tell a joke about trickle down economics, but ninety nine percent of you would never get it anyway. So instead, I'll just leave you with some advice. Light him in on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. Oh there was the first part of that, which, yeah, just light mo on firefucker.
Later day relations
Every