I recalled having a lot of anxiety before any traveling we did when our kids were toddlers. A long car ride or a long flight can be a nightmare if you are not well prepared. I figured I would offer some tips to surviving the trip: For car rides: 1) Schedule the ride around nap time if you can. Kids will sleep in the car. If you have a long car ride ahead, know if your child is more cranky before or after their nap and time the ride accordingly. 2) Pack snacks - Then pack more snacks. Nothing gen...
May 29, 2018•22 min
I said I was going to write a book called 1000 times because that is how many times it feels that we need to say something as parents before our child gets it. In Episode 144 - we talked about 11 ways to improve your listening skills. But this is for us as adults. what about getting our kids to listen to us? It is a big problem. Like so many parenting issues, the problem might not be so much the child's fault as it is our fault for not doing the right things. Usually listening means we want them...
May 22, 2018•21 min
Self-esteem is a popular word that is used in self-improvement. People strive to have self-esteem (feeling good about yourself). Having confidence in our own abilities or worth. The key is that we evaluate our worth. This is not a great concept to help people. Self-acceptance on the other hand allows you to be aware of both strengths and weaknesses. But allows you to accept all of them. It allowing your to not have to wish you were different than you actually are. So how can we increase our self...
May 15, 2018•20 min
I wanted to discuss the topic of love. Specifically the differences of unconditional love versus conditional love and how important it is for our kids. Unconditional love means you love someone regardless of what they do. This can mean what they do for you, how they act, etc Conditional love typically means we require someone to be a certain way or do certain things in order for us to love them. However there are still circumstances I recall (and I'm sure tons of kids do) where you feel like you...
May 09, 2018•19 min
Our job as parents is to teach. I have talked about looking at yourself as a coach in your child's life. How we react and respond to them begins to shape their behavior. It will also shape the relationship we build with them. Let's start with a discussion about how we typically react to something unpleasant when dealing with adults. Alan, as an example. I don't know whether you share a checking account or not, but if you did and your girlfriend spend what you both would consider a lot of money o...
May 02, 2018•29 min
We have so many areas of our life when being judgmental can show up. It happens inside families, at work, with your friends, or even strangers on the street. For many, the opportunity to judge is abundant. But why do we do it and how do we know if we are judgmental? There are some good things related to the why. It may help keep us safe, avoid bad situations. Others say we usually judge others in the areas we feel the weakest. Think about it: "Look at that overweight person" - translation is tha...
Apr 24, 2018•16 min
As kids develop their emotions develop as well. You may experience this yourself as a parent or have seen other kids......hitting their parents, being disrespectful. I recall as a kid getting really angry a lot. I don't remember why other than it was something to use in order to get people to leave me alone....either my sisters to stop teasing me and something else. I think it's important to help kids deal with anger. Given the tools when they are young can hopefully help them as they get older ...
Apr 17, 2018•18 min
The problem is that most of that advice doesn't really help you deal with the serious stuff you face as a new dad. I am going over 6 very valuable lessons that I learned as a new dad. I'm hoping these help you along your journey. #1. It's not all about me - So reality kicks in and you are forced to realize that another human being is dependent on you.....and if you are in relationship, that dependency gets compounded. The decisions and choices you make, now effect other people. I learned it can ...
Apr 10, 2018•17 min
I wanted to talk about a technique my mother used to use on so many things. It was a really simple way she would measure things. It could be how bad a cut hurt when I fell off my bike, to judging the taste of a meal at a restaurant. I'm talking about using the Scale of 1 to 10. What you assign the numbers depends on the context but it became a common way in our family to measure things. It help teach kids measurement and analysis. Here are a few examples: Your 7 year old gets hit in the back by ...
Apr 04, 2018•13 min
There is a very popular book called "The 5 Love Languages" The author is Dr. Gary Chapman. The major concept is that there are 5 different love languages and we all have preferences on how we prefer to receive love (and also give love could be different). So let's go over what the 5 love languages are: Words of Affirmation - Use words to affirm other people. In it's simplicity, your spouse saying "I love you" or when you they tell you how wonderful you are, that really resonates with you. For ot...
Mar 27, 2018•20 min
As a child goes from a baby to a toddler, they begin to understand rules. Words like "NO" come into play. When they are toddlers, it's a great idea to establish family rules that everyone needs to follow. It begin to teach them boundaries. We created a family rule rule chart and I'll put a link to it in the show notes so people can download it as an example. Ours were: 1. Listen to each other 2. Say Please & Thank you 3. Use nice words 4. Always tell the truth 5. Love each other 6. No whinin...
Mar 20, 2018•16 min
We focus so much of our attention on improving what we are not very good at. It seems that it would be much more fruitful for us to focus on what we are good at. Put all of our effort on the areas where we are talented. So how do you figure this out with your children? Or help them figure it out. Well it turns out there are some ways that you can identify their talents and help with nurturing those talents. Whether your child is an amazing musician, exceptional athlete, tremendously smart, or th...
Mar 14, 2018•14 min
This past weekend on Sunday, I accomplished a personal challenge that I had set a few months ago. This was both a mental and physical accomplishment. I had a lot of anxiety building up to the days before this event. The event was called the "Day of Madness". Months ago a friend/neighbor of mine came to me and said "hey, I'm organizing the Day of Madness and I think it would be fun if you did it. We are going to do a bunch of physical things in one day. It started out with quite a few people but ...
Mar 06, 2018•23 min
Having a baby can be pretty scary. What's even more scary is thinking about how much a new baby is going to cost. The average American family spends over $12,000 on child related expenses before the baby's first birthday. According to the Department of Agriculture, a child costs on average $233,000 by the time they are 17. That doesn't include the cost if they go to college or decide to live with you until they are 34 years old. I'm not a financial planner or certified to give financial advice, ...
Feb 27, 2018•24 min
I've said it before and I'll say it again, empathy is the single most important parenting technique I have learned. It has saved me in so many situations from getting upset. It has also helped me connect with my children on a much greater level. I would venture to say it has also been one of the most important things in positively impacting my marriage. Let's start from the top and first explain what empathy is. Empathy is defined in the dictionary as the ability to understand and share the feel...
Feb 21, 2018•27 min
Today we are talking about expectations for first time dads. What should you expect when the baby is born. Here is my overall advice: Expectations are only good to have for the negative stuff. For the good stuff, you don't want to have expectations. This is the topic we are going to discuss today. Let's tart with the obvious things that everyone tells you are going to happen when the child arrives: 1) You will get less sleep 2) You will get less attention from your wife 3) You will probably get ...
Feb 14, 2018•23 min
Well, first I wanted to introduce our sponsor for today's podcast: SmartyPants Vitamins They are Non-GMO & Gluten-Free and filled with great vitamins and minerals like Omega 3 fish oil, Vitamin D, Vitamin B12, and much more. You can buy them from Target, WholeFoods, Walgreens or on Amazon. Ok, on to today's topic. I did a YouTube video on this topic last week. We often think we are feeding our kids healthy foods and drinks but the reality is that we are not.Of course there are different scho...
Feb 06, 2018•30 min
Last week we discussed establishing a night time routine. Well, the second biggest battle in the house is the morning routine. The need for a morning routine really comes into play when your child starts kindergarten. The night time routine can be difficult because you are tired. However I think the morning routine can be much more stressful because you have somewhere you and/or your child need to be. You need to get your child out of the house at a certain time. The process is pretty similar to...
Jan 31, 2018•26 min
People have been in world wars, some of been stuck in mine shafts for days on end without food, There are those that have been tortured by enemies.....none of these, I repeat none of these are as difficult as dealing with night time with a toddler. So today's topic is Establishing a Night Time Routine While we could have multiple episodes just about getting a baby, toddler, or child to sleep through the nite. That's a subject on it's own. We are specifically talking about the 2 hours or so of ti...
Jan 24, 2018•22 min
In celebration of our 150th episode we are looking back to celebrate ourselves. In fact we are giving ourselves awards. I have come up with a few categories and have selected the winners myself. I can do that since I don't have a staff of people or a writer's guild or a bunch of judges. Our first award is: 1) Most Popular Episode - the winner is Episode 49 - which was "39 Life Hacks for Dads" 2) Most Controversial Podcast - the winner is Episode 105 - Does Punishing Your Kids Work? There are peo...
Jan 17, 2018•22 min
This episode is basically a rant about being on your phone: #putyourphonedown If you are on your phone, you can't be fully present. Jason provides a few examples of the situation he witnessed in which people were on their phone, not paying attention to the people in their presence.
Jan 09, 2018•18 min
There are some classic TV shows that provide parents insight and examples that we all have to deal with. While I watched these shows as a kid, seeing them as an adult has provided a new level of respect for the knowledge they share and the family values that are displayed. Here is my list: 1. Family Ties - Parents of 2 girls and one boy, they are hippies (or very liberal) and have political views on the complete opposite side of their son Alex. While there are many differences, they allow their ...
Jan 02, 2018•24 min
In a few days it's going o be 2018. So we put together his list of new year's resolutions for dads. In the new year, these are ways we can improve our parenting and roles as fathers: Be more affectionate towards the kids - At least a hug and kiss every day Listen more, talk less - They don't need answers on everything Read with my kids at night - Whether you read or they read doesn't matter Spend more one on one time - If you have more than one child, make an effort to do something just one on o...
Dec 26, 2017•28 min
I was talking to another parent that was explaining the different amounts of money their child gets depending on their grades. $20 for this, $10 for this, etc. Have you ever been rewarded for your grades? either money or a gift? Parents will often use reward charts to shape behavior. To me it's like a rat with cheese. What happens if there is no cheese? The rat ain't going in that direction. This is the same problem with reward charts. Have you ever seen sticker charts and you get a star if you ...
Dec 19, 2017•17 min
While my wife and I would joke about keeping our kids in a large bubble, the reality is that we need to teach them resiliency to not be greatly effected by life's ups and downs. From bullying to stress, building resiliency can help kids navigate through life just a little easier. Facing tough situations. Tragedy, trauma, or adversity. It doesn't mean always leaving them alone to fend for themselves. Loving relationships and support are important in children building resiliency. But there are def...
Dec 12, 2017•21 min
Today we are talking about one of the most important skills a person can have: listening. Being a good listener can help you professionally as well as personally. It can improve the relationship with your spouse and help create a good relationship with your children. However, research suggests that we remember only 25-50 percent of what we hear. So the reality is that most people are not good listeners. As men, I can probably say in general we are not as good listeners as women. Here are 11 tips...
Dec 05, 20170
We all want our kids to be happy. Parents often think that by giving their child stuff or having an abundance of freedom, they are making them happy. Unfortunately this is very short lived stimuli. What we need to be doing is teaching them to be capable and to feel good about themselves for who and what they are, not what they have. So how do we do this? Well let's identify what overindulging means. In the old days, we called this being spoiled. Of course this is purely my opinion (and I can't e...
Nov 28, 2017•21 min
Typically my kids come in when it gets dark out. I remember growing up, when the street lights come on, that was the time to go in. The other day, it had been dark for about an hour and my kids were still outside. I went outside to call them in for dinner and witnessed something that was almost too good to interupt. There were 7 to 8 kids laughing and playing a not so serious game of basketball. At that moment, I remembered how much I used to enjoy nights like that growing up. I waited for a bre...
Nov 21, 2017•21 min
It's already proven, there is really no debate....affection is crucial for a child's well being. The truth is we all want love and affection. Dads often have a harder time providing affection than moms do. Whether it was the fact that their dad was not affectionate, it feels awkward, or you just don't know. In episode 141 we discuss affection and it's importance for both you and your child. Psychologist Dr. Daniel Singley told us in our interview with him that touch literally changes the neural ...
Nov 14, 2017•23 min
You know how I really have a dislike for technology as it relates to kids. According to a Business Insider article, Both Steve Jobs and Bill Gates had very heavy restrictions on their kid's use of technology and screen time. Back in 2007, Bill Gates implemented a cap on his daughter's use when he felt she had an unhealthy attachment to a video game. Here are a couple of interesting pieces of data from the article: 1) Research has found that an eighth - grader's risk for depression jumps 27% when...
Nov 07, 2017•18 min
