How to break through self-criticism today (145)

Good morning, friends. How are you today? I have a very important topic for today. And at first, though, I want to take you back a minute. I want you to think about a time where you saw a toddler, let's say between, you know, two and five, just get upset and automatically hit their head against something or slap their face or run into a wall, right?

Sounds brutal, I know, but we've all been in situations as caretakers or as observing, let's say, siblings and whatnot, that we see a child harm themselves, okay, in that kind of way. And I want you to think for a minute back to when maybe you did those things. I love to take situations like that and put it into perspective, right? A child is reacting to the moment. What did they do before that? What happened in their head that made them think they had to hit themselves?

And I always go back to that thought process because that's what I do, right? I work with the subconscious mind. And to me, that is a clear indication that that child is either belittling themselves, they are disciplining themselves, they are telling themselves they did something wrong or they didn't get it right. These are thoughts that absolutely happen. In a mind that is trying to fully develop, they have real thoughts. They come here with programs. They get programs from us, right?

There is so much going on there, and they're just so immature in life and experience that when those things come up, they don't know how to handle them. They don't know how to say them. They don't know how to communicate what's going on in their minds. And so they display this form of tantrum or being upset or hurting themselves. Now, I know you can all relate to this. It's not fun to see.

But at the same time, I think it's a little glimpse into that window of when we really start allowing our mind to take control and telling us things that are not true whatsoever. They are blatant lies, right? Someone, right? A child thinking they did something bad and now they're a bad person, right? That's a lie. We all make mistakes. We all can get up. So I want you to think in those terms.

I'm going to go ahead and roll the credits and we're going to get started with today's episode. Hey friend, welcome to Deep Healing for Creative Entrepreneurs. My name is Aubrey Barr and I am a subconscious release technique practitioner and photography business owner. I know you are sick of ending your day feeling overwhelmed and exhausted, and you are seeking a solution to help you feel creatively inspired and actively engaged in your business as well as personal life.

In this podcast, we are going to dig into any limiting beliefs or subconscious programs that are keeping you in a space filled with anxiety and stress. This work is not a temporary solution for your life. No, this is a complete transformation. So grab your coffee or tea and let's start you on the road to healing. And let me just say, you can do this. You are worth it. And you are meant to thrive in life and business. So let's dig in. Music.

Whether we realize it or not, friends, we all have this mindset around being super self-critical of ourselves. And it happens so young, as I started talking about. It happens from birth, right? We're already functioning differently. People. We're not adults. We're not rational. We don't get rational until our 20s, right? But we're already functioning. We're already able to think. We've been thinking all throughout the womb, right?

We are always judgmental towards ourselves and always critical towards ourselves. This is something that with maturity and age, we often start to learn how to regulate, okay? So that That being said, of course, we can't expect much from a small child like that to be able to, you know, regulate their emotions and communicate, more importantly, what's going on with them. But that's our jobs as parents, as adults, as caretakers.

That's how we help them, right? I think we can all agree that that's part of our role as being the more mature one, right? And the way that we care for younger people and the way that we care for ourselves, sadly, is not the same, right? We will give more assurance, more love, more understanding to that younger person, to the younger version of ourselves even, while often overlooking our personal value and worthiness in this world. We all do it, and that's totally okay.

I'm with you on that. I've had to really learn to regulate the way that my thoughts were leaning towards self-criticism for myself, and I still do. too. This is, you guys, this is not something that you get to check off and say, oh, I've completely healed from this. In my personal and professional opinion, this is something that we continue to build on, we continue to grow, we continue to heal on.

But I don't think that there's many people out there that can say that they never criticize themselves anymore. However, when we look at those stories that have been in our minds since young, right, those stories that maybe are super judgmental towards the way we look or towards the way we feel, those stories will continue to play. And that's when it's really important to get rid of those deep-seated beliefs about yourself, those beliefs that you cannot do it, that you are going to fail.

I'll even throw in some trigger words here. I'm too fat, right? I'm never going to be tall enough. I'm too tall. I'm too skinny, right? It really does not matter whatsoever what you actually look like. You are going to have some programs in your mind that contradict that and tell you that you're not going to make it in the world. You are always going to be undeserving, let's say. So it's really important then as adults.

That we find other ways to actually tackle those thought processes, those negative thought patterns, because they're just going to sit there. They're just going to fester. They're just going to show up when you're having a super crappy day, right? They're going to be there like, hey, remember I told you, you suck. I joke. But seriously, they're not going to go anywhere. They're not going anywhere because you've changed what you outwardly say.

You tell yourself every day you love yourself. you know you say all the good things that you're thankful for these are amazing things to do but you're not shifting those past thoughts those are so cemented in there you have to do bigger releases you have to do somatic release around it to be able to move past it so let me go ahead today and give you several things that i think you can do to start changing and shifting that that thought process,

that inner dialogue that is super critical of who you are, where you are, what your purpose is in this world. Okay.

So the first thing you can absolutely do affirmations. I talk about this a lot. I'm not against affirmations. I just feel like some of us don't have space for them because we're so full of the negativity. And don't get me wrong. I don't mean people that are super negative. Like you run into them and you're like, that person is always negative. I just can't stand it. No, it's some of us that are super positive, but our inner dialogue is very negative towards ourselves.

And you could see it in their actions. You can see it in their reclusiveness sometimes. I'm not against introverts. I am one of them, but we do tend to internalize so much of it that we don't often say out loud, I am struggling with the fact that I just gained 20 pounds and I'm in my 40s and I feel like my body's slowing down and I don't know how to get on top of it. P.S. That was all real. But anyway, we don't oftentimes communicate that out loud. And so we keep them inside.

And when you do that, you have to be able to add in some good stuff. But at the same time, you have to learn how to also release some of this stuff. So it is a system. This is what I teach in my courses, you guys, because we need a system in place. We cannot just add in positive affirmations and looking in the mirror and telling us all of the wonderful things we do and accepting compliments and going to the gym and changing things here.

We've got to also implement so many things to get necessary changes. And I'm sorry if that feels like a lot for you. If that feels like I can only do one thing, let's start with one thing, okay? Let's start with planting seeds of love. Empowerment. For instance, get out a piece of paper and write down five things that you are insanely good at.

Okay, these can be actual things that you do physically with your body, like jump roping, holla, or they can be things that you're good at as far as attributes. Like, for instance, I can read someone so easily that when they look at me and they smile and they say, yeah, I'm doing great. I'm like, I can read right through that if they're not, you know, if they're putting on a front.

So what attributes do you have that are just insanely so good and so valuable to the people around you and to yourself? Because that is absolutely a thing. Some of you are amazing and compassionate, like you will take care of anybody. I think it's a beautiful thing. and to be honest, not all of us have it, right? There is a place out there for every single one of us and we all have different things to bring to the table.

So let's start by planting some seeds. Write down a few things that you absolutely just know in your heart that you are good at, that you came here to do, that it feels good to be able to offer that to the world, okay? And then I want you to also start planning out your day to where you have time to do something spiritual. Okay, maybe that's reading a book that is uplifting. Maybe it's a little, maybe it's listening to this podcast, right?

And then I want you to do something physical, especially if you've been sitting, maybe you work from home like I do, and it gets kind of hard. I've been jumping up and doing either jumping jacks or squats. Every 30 minutes or so. And that's really helped me to keep that energy flowing and keep that blood flowing. And it's doing something good for my body. And then we have something where you can learn, right?

Is there anything that makes you more knowledgeable, gains more wisdom that you can add into your day, right? Maybe it's doing small research on maybe a creative project that you'd like to do. You know, my daughter just joined this ice hockey team.

We're going to be traveling. fulfilling I'm already looking up like super creative hockey pictures to do for the team while we're out and it is filling my soul I'm not going to make any money off of it I'm not going to be known for it right but the team will love it and it'll be something that I can give to those families and those other team members and that makes me feel so good I love sharing my talents with others so when I'm

feeling a little bit maybe tired at the end of the night I'm like let me research this. Let me see what else I can do, right? And then I want you to also make sure you add in some time for self-reflection. So that could be 10 minutes, just free writing, okay? Doesn't have to be a topic. It could be a brain dump if that's what you feel like you need, but just free writing about something, about anything. You don't even have to read it again afterwards.

So there's already four things that I want you to add into your day, okay?

Something spiritual, something physical, something that gives you a little more knowledge, and then something that... Allows you to do more self-reflection. Okay. These are ways that we really start to make changes.

Now, besides all of that, you can absolutely sign up for my self-led course called the Ultimate Love Your Body Course. And this program is four modules, and it's really about deleting, just completely erasing those stories about your physical appearance. Those stories about how you feel in your body, right? I have a lot of clients with like autoimmune disease or other issues where they need a lot of massage, right?

So I've been around people for a long time and I know that some of these programs are, I'm always in pain. I never feel good. My body is broken, right? These are programs that we absolutely need to get rid of. These are detrimental to your mental health and to your physical health, to be honest with you. When you think, oh, I don't know why I can't get up to do those squats. I just can't do it. But yet you still have this program that's saying your body is broken.

You're never going to be able to do it. It's super hard to go against that. And I don't want people to give up on that. I don't want you to feel like, well, nothing works. That's another program that we release in the course. So it's absolutely detrimental to you guys that you really look at your mental health and start to shift those thoughts. These thoughts Lots have been with you for decades. They're not serving you. They do not make you a better person.

And at the end of the day, they could be keeping you from your biggest health-related goals. So I firmly suggest that you guys, if this is speaking to you, go ahead and sign up for that self-led course. You will have lifetime access. And if you wanted to do the whole program today, you could. So I will put it in the show notes. Make sure you guys take advantage of me releasing that again. I know it's something that has helped so many people already.

And for me personally, I never took the course. I just did the program and laid it out. And I didn't actually do the somatic releases until I had an experience this past weekend that reminded me that I didn't do it. And so I went back and I started doing them. I'm on module two. I just find them so life-altering to be able to release those. Say peace out. I don't need this negative broken record in the back of my head.

I actually need positive things and there's no space for them while these are still lingering. All right, guys, I hope you guys have a beautiful day. I'm sending my love to you and I'm thankful for the massive growth of this podcast, especially recently. So if you have haven't had a chance to give me a five-star rating and maybe write a review, that would be amazing.

It shows me how thankful you guys are for this platform and for the opportunity to learn more about the subconscious mind and how we can take this into our own hands and shift our lives for the better. All right, friends, I will talk to you soon. I hope this podcast spoke to you in some way. If it did, please go ahead and leave me a review and subscribe so that I know you're enjoying what you hear.

And further, if you know somebody else who owns their own creative business and struggles with anything that we spoke about, please pass this on because it is my hope that we will be able to build a community of like-minded individuals who love on each other and appreciate the many facets that make our creative business so unique. me. And lastly, check out the show notes to find my free Facebook community and other useful links to work with me. All right, friend, see you soon. Music.