DE-FUND THE TRUMP DICTATORSHIP - 10.27.25

with seditious conspiracy is legal. Nothing Trump has done in his attempt to begin ethnic cleansing of Hispanics in this country Gestapo like raids, kidnappings, deportations is legal. Nothing Trump has done in sending so called election monitors to interfere in the voting in California and Jersey on behalf of the MAGA is legal. Nothing Trump has done to enable the passive self neutering of the House and Senate is legal.

Nothing Trump has done to let him say, supposedly jokingly for The New York Times yesterday, I'm the Speaker and the President is legal. Nothing Trump has done in his demolition against destruction of attack on the East Wing of the White House is legal. Nothing Trump has done in murdering citizens of other nations in international waters without evidence and without a declaration of war, without any congressional oversight. None of that is legal. Nothing he has done to

send battleships to Latin America is legal. Nothing he has done to accept money from international sources for himself and his family is legal. Nothing he has done to try to buy the election for the fascist Malay in Argentina is legal. Nothing Trump has done in selling one hundred and thirty million dollars worth of influence in the army to someone aptly described as a weirdo Nepo baby is legal.

Almost nothing about the Trump administration, about his presidency, about his forming unilateral dictatorship, is legal, and thus it is time to cut him off financially, to take the one measure that will force an end to this trumpion madness for the Blue States to follow up on Governor Newsom's suggestion, on the suggestion of others including me in this forum, and stop transmitting federal taxes from the States to the

National Treasury until Trump resigns as president period. We must have a state led tax payment boycott, and it must be led by governors and other state officials, so that there can be no attempt by Trump or his enablers and flunkies and whorees to prosecute or further threaten democracy loving civilians. For more than our two hundred and fifty years as a nation, we have proudly recited the phrase no taxation without representation, and it is pastime to apply

it here. And it is essential that governors like Newsom and Pritzker and Hokel and others in the majority states protect their citizens who are being subject to taxation without representation and without democracy, and for them the governors to take responsibility for these acts. The state of California must refuse to send any funds it can control to Washington. The state of Illinois must refuse to send any funds

it can control to Washington. The state of New York must refuse to send any funds it can control to Washington. And if it wrecks the world economy, so be it. That will be better than what we have now and what is coming under Trump. Donald Trump is now a rogue dictator. He is almost completely and fully outside the law.

He is engorging himself with public funds. He is insisting the government fix the twenty twenty election when it was his government and everybody he has demanded be prosecuted for it, except as FBI director was not in the government in twenty twenty. That's how effing crazy this ass whole is. He is destroying not just government buildings without any legal authorization, He is destroying symbols of the American nation without any legal authorization. He is deranging our public discourse. He is

destroying our public safety. He is threatening the lives of everyone in this country and the only that works in America. Right now, money used as a weapon must be used to freeze him where he stands so that this nation can roll back the years and decades of damage he has done. Now now, now dfund Donald Trump. That quote I mentioned from the New York Times story yesterday, quote, I'm the speaker and the president, mister Trump has joked. According to two people who heard the remark, that may

be the least surprising news item of the year. But seeing Maga go on the record in that Time story, Steve Bannon is quoted. Representatives Kylie and Van Dine are quoted seeing him go on the record to carve up Mike tiny flaccid Johnson suggests Trump is not only forcing this impotent Johnson to do all the dirty work, but then blaming him for the inevitable results. I have no sympathy for Johnson. This is the hell he has created for himself. It's just interesting, as in, He's going to

throw Johnson overboard soon, isn't he. We're going to go through all that again with the Speaker of the House. Now, the headline today should not be that. It should be this story that Trump is sending election observers to New Jersey and California. It's straight up Jim Crow Southern voter intimidation. But I can understand and give a pass to the fact that it's difficult to pick out the headline from this kaleidoscope of shit Trump drops on us all every day.

I'm beginning to suspect the video was not AI hell, I didn't lead with the election observers. Plus, it is tough when you realize Trump announces he's building an arc the election observers in a moment, let's let's let's let's talk arc. I don't know if he's crazy enough to think he's building Noah's arc. I don't know if he's crazy enough to think he's building a space arc like

Musk wants. I don't know if he's crazy enough to think the word arch A R C H, common everyday English word like the thing he wants to build to march troops through in DC. The arc to Trump, I don't know which crazy it is. He thinks it's arc as in French, but it's arch. But he says he's building an R and he's going to illegally spend some of the illegal money for the illegal ballroom on this illegal arc. You think I'm exaggerating.

I said three hundred and fifty. But it's privately funded with corporate bribes, meaning it's fine because it's privately funded. But of course No Kings is a communist plot because some of the logistics for it were privately funded. Privately funded communism. Plus, what is the problem about how much

it's gonna cost? A woman named Cheryl Cassone on Fox, who once was an actual CNBC business reporter and is now at the I'll say anything to stay in the TV business stage, emitted this perfectly symmetrical sophistry in defense of what are certain to be endless cost overruns on the only building big enough to house Trump's ego quote that going after him about the cost. Initially he said it was going to be two hundred million. Now it's

like three hundred million. Oh no, construction cost, You're higher than what the original budget or quote was shocking. Let's call the National Guard in give me a break unquote national Guard, you say, miss Cassone. Interesting reference. Trump does call in the National Guard for everything else. Why isn't he calling in the National Guard here? It's only fifty seventy five percent over the cost Social Security has been cut passive aggressively. Starting in January, the cost of living

adjustment will be two point eight percent. The average annual increase in the last decade had been three point one percent, so it's ten percent less and with inflation at three percent, Trump has just made seventy one million Americans ten percent poor. Seventeen million Americans will pay thirty percent more for the Trump version of Obamacare. He makes billionss arches and ballrooms.

We pay thousands. We sent twenty billion to try to save Milay of Argentina without even getting a guarantee that he's going to get a grown up haircut, one that would make him not look like the late great comedian Marty Allen. Google Marty Allen. It'll be worth it. Oh yeah, and he's declared he can kill people at whim, murder them,

but happily they're just foreigners right now. Anyway, if you are declaring war against these cartels, and Congress is likely to approve of that process, why not just ask for a declaration of war.

depends on the infrastructure of politics continuing unchanged. Doesn't matter if we're fascist, communist, democratic, doesn't matter who's in charge, just as long as all of their jobs at the Washington Post still exists or at the State Department. There is a deep state. It is not nefarious. It is simply self preserving. Do not say, oh, we need to be moderate Democrats, don't run against Trump. The guy who says I will put Trump behind bars, come hell or

high water is the one who gets the nomination. And I'm using guy generally. Man, woman, I don't care. Speaking of which, there's Harmeit Dillon, who also should be turned

over to the International Court. One of the worst of the Trumpsts, a tenth rate lawyer used to represent Tulsey skunk Air Gabbard is now in charge of civil rights at the DOJ that would be protecting white people from laws the civil rights It's her department that will be asked to monitor polling sites in Passaic County, New Jersey, and five California counties La, Orange, Kern, Riverside, and Fresno to quote insure transparency, ballot security and compliance with federal law.

In other words, those counties that did not vote Republican and Trump wants monitors there will they be accompanied by the National Guard, and the monitors and whoever is with them will intimidate Democratic voters. Just a coincidence that California

will be voting on redrawing the election map. In recent elections, we have received reports of irregularities in these counties that we fear will undermine either the willingness of voters to participate in the election or their confidence in the announced results of the election, writes the MAGA GOP chairwoman Korn Rankin of California. I'll translate that from MAGA to English. The irregularities are Republicans can't win in those counties. There

aren't enough of them. This is how voting works. You have more votes, you win. So the translation is we can't win, so we have to fix the election. You want to send election observers into New Jersey to find out why the Republicans keep running candidates even worse than the Democrats find in New Jersey, I'll listen to that intervention. As to California, korn Rankin, shove it up up your ass. One note from twenty twenty two and twenty twenty four.

The DOJ wanted to send monitors to actual troubled voting areas. They were prevented prevented by local officials local Republican officials

in Missouri and Florida. As to California and Jersey, governor's Newsom and Murphy should get on the jump here, call out the National Guard in their states and arrest the quote election observers as soon as they get off the plane, or if they're not going by plane, climb out of the closest HARMEI Dylan Sewer in a totally different kind of election observation Here is my observation about the main Senate election. Graham Plattner had to drop out last week. He did not. He has to drop out even more

this week. Yes, he has a Nazi tattoo. He's covered it up. Now, the Nazi tattoo did not bother as many many people as I thought it was gonna. I had to admit surprise there. I'm not easily surprised anymore. But how about this? Does this bother anybody? It looks like he lied about not knowing it was a Nazi symbol in his tattoo on his body. Get out. His supporters renounced him, including Bernie Sanders, renounce Graham Plattner. Graham Platner has no judgment, no hesitation to lie his way

out of a problem. We already have enough people like that. CNN reported that he knew about it more than a decade ago, talked about it, wrote about it online. I'll just read the k file report quote. Jewish Insider first reported about the former acquaintance who recalled Platner referring to the image as my totin cough unquote in a joking way. More than a decade ago. CNN spoke with that same

acquaintance who reiterated the recollection. CNN also spoke with an acquaintance of Platner for more than a decade ago, who said Platner spoke about his tattoo resembling a Nazi symbol. A second person told CNN that they learned of the tattoo years ago from the acquaintance, who told them that

Platner had described it as a Nazi style design. CNN also reviewed a text chain between the acquaintance and another person discussing Platner's Nazi liank tattoo several months ago before the story became public, using to continue the CNN report

his longtime Reddit handle p Hustle. The former Marine infantryryman and future Democratic Senate hopeful, also argued in a twenty twenty online discussion that SS lightning bolt tattoos were a culture marker within Marine Scout sniper units, not an expression

of white supremacist ideology. When commenters in the twenty twenty thread described the lightning bolts as a Nazi or racist symbol, Platnir dismissed the criticism, writing that outsiders quote have no idea what they're talking about, and added I will be sure to inform the black guys I know with bolts that they're Nazis now, so the symbol he didn't know was believed to be was interpreted as was a Nazi symbol he was denying was a Nazi symbol five years

ago and making reference to the word Nazi. If somehow you still don't think this is disqualifying or that there's some kind of other explanation, let me ask you this. The guy's response to the story breaking was to cover it up figuratively first then literally, So what's the next story, and what's he going to do about that story? And

who knows that story? Right now? Who knows that story and is just saving it so it can be used at the right moment to give us another six years of Susan fing Collins Now another edition of It's called a news medium because it's neither rare nor well done. Bill Maher, Olivia newsy Comcast, Cheryl Hines, Brett Bhar, Brett Behar first to CBS to do the CBS Evening News, the latest ratings at Fox for the Brett Baer News

Propaganda caston eight hundred and sixty two thousand viewers. Latest CBS Evening News viewership three million, six hundred and sixty one thousand. If there is one move to make to kill off the CBS Evening News before the end of the year, maybe it is to alienate the audience which agrees with its producers, whether or not you or I do. Aliena the audience which agrees with its producers that the CBS Evening News is a good and politically accurate or

politically neutral newscast. Alienate them by putting on someone scene as a right wing nutjob who is quoted in the lawsuits which Fox had to settle for umpteen million dollars as an unapologetic, utterly biased right wing propagandist. TV executives experienced TV executives, not the dozens of Barry Weiss's who have been put in charge only to fail almost immediately, the ones who come and go every eighteen months or so.

Somewhere in television. They have always believed that an audience can be picked up and moved from one network to the other without losing any viewers. It's madness. This is why they hired Megan Kelly at NBC. Look at all those viewers will get years before they'd hired Rita from Fox News on the weekends and said, look at her numbers on the weekends. They're bigger than our numbers on the week We'll put her on MSNBC and she'll get those numbers. She didn't get those numbers because she was

any good. She got those numbers because she was on Fox. It is madness. We're gonna move that audience from one network to another. We're gonna move Brett Beher's audience to CBS. It's like deciding you're gonna move a river by picking up the water in the palms of your hands. Thirty years ago, when ESPN launched ESPN two, the thought was all the younger viewers in America, all the sports fans under say thirty five, they're gonna go watch the new hip ESPN two. You can tell it's hip, it has

two in it. Well, just before we launched ESPN two, the executive who postulated this, who, by the way, was not originally television. He was a newspaper and magazine guy. He had many good eydea is, but probably ninety seven out of one hundred of them were disasters. The other three put them in the Hall of fame. But this executive postulated that it would be a great idea that we should start a network for fans under thirty five. He asked me if I knew which program in all

of television Hall already had that audience. Which program, he asked me, in all of television has the audience with the highest percentage of its viewers who are under thirty five. I said, I assumed that had to be some show on MTV, and the executive laughed and proudly said, No, it's your show, the eleven PM SportsCenter. I thought for a second, and then I said, wait, that's the show you're taking me off to go do this You already have.

We already have the audience under the age of thirty five, and they're watching me on the show I'm doing now. They live at SportsCenter, and you're going to start at ESPN two, and you're kicking them out of SportsCenter and kicking me out of SportsCenter and expecting us to go watch this new thing. Most of them don't even get on their cable systems. You already have these viewers, and you just told them to get lost, and you just paid me more money to go do this other show

to get the audience we already have. He paused, and then a blank look crossed his face, which was pretty blank to begin with, and he said, hmm, I have to go make a few phone calls. I was back on SportsCenter seven months later. I know Bret Bhar a little bit. He's not a journalist. He thinks he's a journalist. He might be tempted to go anchor the CBS Evening News because Cronkite did, unless he thinks about it. And while he is not a journalist, he's also not a moron.

I am not convinced I can say that about Barry Weiss and the people who just took over CBS News, who, if they put a right wing ideologue in the anchor chair, will be able to lose even more money more quickly than anybody believes possible. Meanwhile, over at NBC, Comcast has been identified as one of the firms playing for Trump's ballroom and memorial airplane hangar, paying and playing, but playing that makes NBC News and MSNBC and CNBC and all

the rest untrustworthy. That is what Bob Eiger bought for ABC News. Then he swerved away somewhat anyway over the Kimmel and Disney plus subscriptions disaster. He may have avoided the acts CBS has not. It already went there irretrievably. But the question is comcast in. They're right on the precipice. Does a company, especially a company that does news for money in many different venues, does it have the right to pay a bribe in order to avoid unjustifiable and

retaliatory prosecution. I'm not sure the answer is no. If there is no other way to save yourself from getting shot, do you give the hold up man the money? The key is, is there no other way? Bill Maher In the New York Mayor's race, my old college frenemie has endorsed the sheep in sheep's clothing. Andrew Cuomo may not be that exciting, mar said, and that inspirational, but for a party that said we want to go back to normal, he's kind of normal. Yeah, yeah, Bill, You hear the

word normal a lot when people mention Cuomo. Guests then pointed out that Cuomo resigned as governor of New York. A federal investigation concluded that he had been a sex pest or worse to at least thirteen female staffers. Plus there were all those dead people in the nursing homes. That's not normal for a governor. Bill mar said, Oh no, I did my own research before having Cuomo on his show. Quote a lot of it's kind of bullshit. I mean, maybe he was a little too handsy, a little too Italian,

a little too touchy. You know. Why would Bill Maher defend Cuomo and dismiss all of that and those thirteen women with the phrase maybe he was a little too handsy. Well, take a guess. Also, it's time to confess for the last six or seven years that I would go to LA to appear on Bill Mahers show, like the yearsenty ten to twenty seventeen, I did it. I did it because, as many of my fellow guests would admit to one another, but only out of earshot. Maybe we're in the parking

lot going to have a smoke or something. We went because because they spent money, they would fly us round trip from the East Coast first class. Hell. I used to plan my business trips and vacations around it. I'm sorry. Plus, back to the hands the part when I went on his old ABC show. An acquaintance who was one of the producers who had called me and asked me to be on it, told me, whatever I did, do not shake Bill's hand before we taped. He's he's probably uh.

Took her a long time to get the rest of her remark out. He he's probably uh just warmed up, if you get my meaning. But they flew us first class on the same subject and not the airplane part. How do insane confidence men and alleged on camera masturbators like Robert Kennedy Junior survive? Let alone succeed because a thousand people on the fringes do nothing about him. One

of those people is Cheryl Hines. She went on the podcast of the Almost as Strange, wife of Stephen Miller Katie Miller, who asked her about quote rumors or speculation about her marriage. Miller was asking about how much her husband f surround.

but I won't, but you can if you want. Cheryl doesn't matter if you know her. It matters that Kennedy knows her and how he knows her. How close to the Biblical knows is this? And consider the source. You're married to Bobby Kennedy Junior, possibly the worst source in America next to Trump. But consider the source. I don't. I think perhaps I've noted here that I'm not attacking my ex, but I'm certainly not carrying water for her. But consider the there's a publisher putting out her book.

The publisher can be sued if any of her allegations are untrue, and she is going to go into the whole Kennedy thing. And then there's her more recent ex whom she did sue, who she tried to get arrested, and then something happened and suddenly she wasn't suing him, and she was quote leaving her job, and oh, the FBI was no longer involved, and we all know what that something had happened had to have been to get

her to drop all the theatrics. That's something that had to have happened that provided all those exquisite details and quotes about her interactions with Kennedy and all the I want to impregnate you stuff and the other stuff that led me to say, I'm still grossed out. And I lived with her for three years. Somebody has a transcript of or more likely a recording of them on on FaceTime or some part of the body time. Hey, you also of interest here, Anna Paulina Luna? Could she be

the dumbest Republican congresswoman? What do your rankings look like? How is your bracket? Could she really be dimmer than McCain, McLain that was a Freudian slip, Bobert Green and the others? Could she be dumber than them combined? Let's ask the California congressman with whom Anna Paulina Luna had an online

fight over the funds for No Kings. All right, we can't ask the California congressman with whom she had an online fight over the funding for No Kings Because, unbeknownst to Anna Paulina Luna, the California congressman with whom she had an online fight over the funding for No Kings, does not actually exist. He's a satirical character and she doesn't know this. That's next. This is Countdown. This is Countdown with Keith Oberman still ahead on this episode of Countdown.

The anniversary was last week, in fact, the twenty fifth anniversary, and it was during the World Series. And today this is still during the World Series. And after a number of years in which this saga had cooled in importance, it seems to have reasserted itself as a part of baseball. Loar that I was in the middle of the night Roger Clemens of the New York Yankees, through Mike Piazza of the New York Mets, broken bat at Mike Piazza during the World Series, or didn't throw it at him,

or threw it at me in the Yankee dugout. And it all ends with Mike Piazza threatening to sue me. And next in Things I promised not to tell but so long that I will start it immediately after the end of Worse Persons, Then there'll be a commercial and then part two. First Believe it or Not there are still more new idiots to talk about the roundup of the miscreants, morons and Dunn Kruger effects specimens who constitute

two Day's other worst persons in the world World. We have a tie at bronze for worse Ice in DC with Oh no, you want details. American Isis arrested a man named Sam O'Hara in a raid in DC at Logan Circle. He was arrested for playing Darth Vader's theme music. The Imperial March arrested. The ACLU has sued on his behalf because guess what, satire is still legal. Also, if you're wearing masks, how do we know you're not members

of the Imperial thing? From Star Wars. But it's what they wrote about Ice that I'm quoting here point four. The law might have tolerated government conduct of this sort a long time ago in a galaxy far far away, but in the here and now, the First Amendment bars of government officials from shutting down peaceful protests, et cetera, et cetera. I just like the formal use of the only part of Star Wars I stayed to see. Yes, you're looking at the guy who walked out in nineteen

seventy seven. I'm not saying I was physically triggered. I just didn't really. It did give me a headache. I just didn't like it. But I still find the reference to it in illegal Action reassuringly funny. We may all be making our jokes inside concentration camps where the guards where logos with Donald Trump's face on them, but at least we'll still be having fun. That's tied with somebody who'll be there in her little Ilsis she Wolf of the SS outfit? Kaylee mcinaney smiling all the way through.

Kaylee macinaney, one of Trump's lying, lying lawyer and laying things gefflingen Flungen Kaylee macinaney, one of Trump's lying liars from the first time around. No, I'm not doing a second take on this, smiling all the way through as she always does, because Jesus saydist This is the reaction to Trump trashing the economy, particularly the economy for food, particularly the economy for lower income television viewers and the elderly people like my age and older who watch a

lot of Fox News. Not that I do, but they do, and smiling all the way through this I cannot possibly even if I played this clip and risked a lawsuit from Fox in playing it, I could not possibly possibly convey to you Kayley mcinnaney's desperate smile all the way through this everything sign they have a gun of my work.

They're gonna shoot. They're gonna put me in the concentration crip too, Kaylee mcinnaney quote one tried and true brand is making a big comeback as consumers tighten their wallets. Hamburger Helper, the mix of mac and cheese and ground beef is seeing a surge in sales. Isn't that great? People are starving to death already. Isn't that great? And you helped Daily mcahaney the runner up, the priceless Anna Paulina Luna, who, if she did not exist, would have

to be created. This may be the dumbest person in America. I know. I keep going back and forth among the various members of the House of Representatives, in the Republican Caucus, in the House, in the Senate, and I keep saying, no, no, Ultimately, it's still Bobert, No, No, It's it's McLean from Michigan, who once demonstrated in the past week the idea that there were protesters. She demonstrated this by moving her arm arms. She bawled up her fists and did her little arm march.

Lisa McClean absolute IQ none detected but the original one maybe, Anna Paulina my Hoff Luna. Anna Paulina posted this at Rep. Jack Kimball asked me for receipts, but blocked me before I could respond. Weird flex So here are the receipts.

fifty fourth District of California wrote, this is large. Anna Paulina has foung proof that No Kings marchers were paid nearly forty two cents each for participating. So she reposted all of this a screenshot of what Jack Kimball wrote in response to hers and just turned it into a fight and said that Jack Kimball asked her for receipts, which he did not. But the most interesting part, of course,

is there is no representative Jack Kimball. The giveaway is, Anna, you never met him, and he's supposedly a Republican and he's from the fifty fourth district of California. And I know for people like Anna Paulina Luna, the number fifty four is might as well be the same as two hundred and ninety four million. It's an inestimably large number. It's double or triple her IQ fifty four the fifty fourth.

There is no fifty fourth congressional district. Jack Kimball is one of the oldest satirical accounts on Twitter x and she fell for it. But a screenshot is forever Congratulations on reclaiming your crown. Here's your crown, moron, but our winner as always Cuomo. I'm sure you heard something about this. Andrew Cuomo's self defenestration campaign continues apace, right down to election day. He's going to make sure that nobody in the city of New York, other than possibly in Staten Island,

thinks well of him. Ever again, he will bring down his brother, who is already pretty much down as it is. He will bring down his late father's name. There will be a bid to remove his late father's name from what is actually the tap and Z Bridge connecting Terrytown, New York, and Rockland County across the Hudson. They will do it. He is destroying the Cuomo family name, and his father was actually a very good governor Andrew Cuomo.

According to reporter Nick Garber, talking to conservative radio host sid Rosenberg this morning, sid Rosenberg, you may have seen has the darkest ten of anybody who was not injured in some sort of radiation accident. Cuomo asked this in an interview about the man who's going to defeat him in the mayoral election, as he defeated him in the mayoral primary. Zoraon Mamdani quote, God forbid another nine to eleven. Can you imagine ma'm donni in the seat, sid Rosenberg,

scumbag looks like a burn victim. Sid Rosenberg replies, he'd be cheering. Cuomo paused and chuckled before saying that's another problem. I was here on nine to eleven, and I was here in the months after nine to eleven, and I have been here, in fact in this city. I got back from Los Angeles in late June or the beginning of July of two thousand and one, and I have lived here ever since without interruption. I don't think I've been away for more than three weeks at a span

since then. And the one thing that has not happened in this city since then has been problems created by people of the Muslim faith of all the religions in this city that have done the most to try to outreach to other groups, to try to heal the wounds, and practically speaking, to invest their money in the areas that were blighted after nine to eleven. Members of the

Islamic faith. I just I don't get the enmity. It's probably from people who were not adults on nine to eleven, who have now conflated everything because of scumbags like Trump and scumbags like Andrew Cromo. Andrew Como is not a Democrat. I don't know if he's a Republican. I don't know if he has any convictions whatsoever. Though I think he should have been convicted of something. I just think to say this about somebody who is likely to be the next mayor of New York indicates a total lack of

responsibility or interest in anybody alive except himself. I think he should go to hell. All I know for sure about his convictions and how you would describe Andrew Cuomo is the following. He is Andrew Cuomo two Day's worst person in the world. Before the World Series ends, I have to tell this thing I promise not to tell, because by the time of the next one of these segments, no matter how long it lasts, the World Series will

be over. So here is our number one story things I promise not to tell my favorite topic me and the series will be over, which is more than I can say for this story, which is chronologically and in terms of storytelling time, the longest one of these I can not only imagine having told, but ever telling. It started on the night of October twenty second, two thousand and it ended well. I'll let you know if and when it ever ends. I was enjoying the second night

of one of my childhood dreams come true. I was the host, not just of the telecast of the World Series. But it was an all New York City series, a Mets versus Yankee series, a subway series. I'd literally dreamt of it since nineteen sixty seven. The manager of the Yankees had been the first person I ever interviewed on TV. Fifteen years earlier, I had worked with him in TV. He was a friend of mine. I had just covered the Mets through their playoff run and knew all of

their players. My face had been on an advertisement in dead center field in the Mets Stadium for the entirety of the year before, and the players all knew me my name. Where we were that night, Yankee Stadium was not only where I saw my first baseball game, but was about seven eighths of a mile from the hospital in which I had been born, and my first home

was four subway stops away. The night before this event, as I hosted the start of the first game of this Keith of palooza, I was supposed to introduce the public address announcer of Yankee Stadium, Bob Sheppard, whose voice I had heard nearly every day since I was eight years old, so he could then introduce the players and this epic World Series would begin, and it dawned on me in the seconds before I was supposed to do this that I literally had the power to stop the

two thousand World Series from ever happening if I just kept talking and never actually said, here is Bob Shephard. Well, I could delay it briefly until they cut my mic off and then fired me on the spot. Anyway, this was Game two, and now that our pregame show was over, and I had waved to my mother, who had seen her first game at Yankee Stadium just ooh sixty six years previously, and she was seated in the family seats that were just nine rows up from our on field set.

I had crawled into the position I would assume for the entire game as the dugout reporter. I was hunched over on a stool, squeezed between the far end of the Yankee dugout and our Fox Sports first base camera. A thin chicken wire fence separated me from the dugout himself. In fact, it was a formality. I was more or less in the dugout players, coaches, and that night, as I settled in, my friend, the Yankee manager, all came

over to say hello. Roger Clemens of the Yankees, who I had also known since we were both rookies in Boston Sports in nineteen eighty four. He lasted, I didn't Roger Clemens had struck out the first two Mets hitters.

Clemens was a strange man about whom I had heard a strange tale of teammates in a college summer baseball league who were all wearing their wallets in their uniform pants back pockets during a game because one of them explained to a friend of mine, we have this crazy kid Clemens from Texas on this team, and we don't trust him. In Boston, I had found him a little nervous,

little standoffish, but doing his best to be professional. But by now there were rumors swirling around Roger Clemens about amphetamines and performance enhancing drugs, and you knew not to talk to him before or after a game unless you had to, and if you had to, you chose your words very carefully, then made sure that whatever you did, you had to start with something mundane, like the score of the game, and if you could let him bring

up anything controversial or complex, he would then probably do it. So now, as this game continued, after two batters had struck out, Lee Mazzilli, the former Mets star now Yankees coach, another friend of mine, was on the other side of a little fence, and as Mets superstar Mike Piazza stepped in as the third batter of the game, Mozilly leaned in and said, conspiratorily, let's see if Roger flips him again. In Midsummer two thousand, Roger Clemens had beamed Mike Piazza

with a fastball. There was a hospital visit involved. Nobody was convinced it had not been intentional, or that Clemens would not do it again, even though it was the World Series. Mozilli and I leaned forward. Piazza was a

deeply complicated guy too. During the playoffs, he had walked up to me and asked me if it was true I was from New York, and then he quizzed me about the relative merits of the suburbs, and then he wanted to know if I had really taken up residence in his favorite southern California hotel, and we talked for fifteen minutes about that. The next night I saw him smiled, said heloon, and he looked at me like I had

just sworn a vendetta against his family. For a long time I thought it was me until about ten years later, the great Vin Scully said that Piazza was with the Dodgers, and when they were both together there in Los Angeles, Vin had had the identical experience with Piazza. Best friends on the team bus one day, and then no indication Piazza remembered even meeting him the next I mean that

was Ben Sculley. Clemens, as it turned out, did not throw a baseball at Piazza, but instead pitched him inside in on his hands, and Piazza tried to stop a swing that was half self defense, but instead the odd angle and the force of the pitch shattered Piazza's bat. The ball veered to the right, describing a circle into foul territory. The head of the bat shot out towards Clemens on the mound. A second piece flew briefly into the infield. Piazza was left holding just the handle, and

it looked as foolish as that sounds. But lost in this description is the fact that all happened at once, and even from our signe angle in the Yankee dugout it looked to Mozillion me as if Piazza's bat had simply exploded, like it was a trick device of some sort. I saw Clemens reach for the baseball. I thought it was the baseball right in front of him, and then just as quickly he and I at the same moment,

realized it was not the baseball. It was the barrel of the bat, which was slightly rounded, just a little darker than a baseball, but could in the heat of an instant following a bat explosion, it could be mistaken for a ball. So far, so good. But right then Clemens, realizing it was part of a bat and not a ball, promptly threw that part of the bat at me. Jesus Mas, I said to Mizilly, why did Clemens throw that bat barrel at me? The Yankee coach looked incredulously at me.

He didn't throw it you. He threw it at me. That's what it looked like. We were lined up perfectly. Roger Clemens had thrown the barrel of Mike Piazza's bat, say, one hundred and twenty feet instead of just six or seven feet, he would have hit either me or Lee Mozilly in the Yankee dugout as it was, since nobody knew exactly what was happening. Piazza had started to run down to first base in case the ball was fair.

He didn't know where the ball was either. For that initial split second, you really couldn't tell which flying object was the ball, and also whether the ball was fair or foul. So Roger Clemens's throw certainly looked like it was aimed at Piazza as Piazza went down the first baseline and as Piazza took umbrage, and there was another split second of confusion when it looked like Piazza might charge out to the mound to try to sock Clemens

for this and for the Midsummer beating. I said to Missilly, wait, did he throw that bat at Piazza? Miszilly just shook his head. I don't think so. Whun hell knows. He's been here two years. I haven't figured out anything he's done so far. As the umpires then got involved, Clemens repeatedly tapped his own chest, and not in a bragging way, but in a kind of what looked like that's on me way. Two bat boys collected the three main pieces of the bat and a bunch of smaller shards, some

of them smaller than a toothpick. The Fox play by play man threw it to me in the dugout well, I said, I can tell you the Yankee dugout doesn't know what happened or why. Joe Missilly laughed quietly and then hit me in the arm. While I was on the air, I postulated that Clemens was looking for a ball hit back to him, instead found the piece of the bat, and then discarded that piece of the bats

so he could keep looking for the ball. That he discarded, it kind of where Piazza was running, might have been delivered, might have been a coincidence. I do remember suggesting that if Clemens had really aimed the bat at Piazza, that from that distance, with the strength and accuracy of a major league pitcher, he clearly would have hit him with it.

Piazza then promptly grounded out to end the inning, and as Clemens came back towards the Yankee dugout where Mozilly and I were, he again stopped to talk to the umpire, who was Charlie Reliford. Over the noise of fifty six thousand fans, at Yankee Stadium. I couldn't hear a damn thing, but it sure looked like Clemens was again saying that

was on me. I asked Mizillly if he could find out if that's what Clemens was doing, And half an inning later, Missilly reported that Clemens indeed thought for a second it was the ball, and that he threw it, and that it was on him, and that it was not intentional and it was not directed at Piazza. Now

I did something kind of stupid. I suggested to my bosses that I should go ask the commissioner Baseball, who in a World Series game had the power to eject any player for any reason, although that power had not actually been used since nineteen thirty four. What he thought

of all this? The producer said yes, And I thought me and my big mouth, I now had to crawl out of that little space between camera and dugout, and I mean literally crawl hands and knees to exit back into the seats via where the groundskeepers kept all the extra dirt. I knew where in the stands the commissioner was sitting. I went there. I got to him, I asked him. He assured me there was no discipline coming for Clemens, and they'd look at the tape of the

game again that night or in the morning. But he really didn't think Clemens had tried to hit Piazza with the bat. Well, they would look at the tape and they decided both that Clemens did not try to hit Piazza with the bat and that he should be fined fifty thousand dollars for I don't know, not trying to hit him with the bat. So I made it back to the dugout, reversing my crawl like I was recreating

the movie The Great Escape. As it turned out, Piazza's little squib shot that caused all the trouble with the exploding bat was about the hardest thing they hit off Clemens all night. Over eight innings, he struck out nine Mets batters, he walked none, he gave up only two hits, and he only hit one batter. And then, incredibly, after Clemens left the game, the Yankees almost blew a six

to nothing lead. In the ninth inning, a Met outfielder named Jay Payton hit a three run homer off future Hall of Famer Mariano Rivera, and the Mets had a chance to tie the game or go ahead off Rivera in the top of the ninth and then he got out of it, and the final score was six to five Yankees. And with the game over now it was

Keith interviews Clemens' time. I went to the pre arranged spot at the other end of the Yankee dugout, where another friend of mine, the Yankees PR director, had guaranteed me he would go in get Clemens and they would emerge after Clemens left the clubhouse to do what was a contractually obligated interview with Fox and me. Apparently, Roger Clemens started making his way towards me the moment the

Yankees finally won that game. Unfortunately, at that exact moment, security closed the only runway from the Yankee dugout to the clubhouse so that a dignitary could use it as an exit from his seats. The dignitary was Mayor Rudolph Giuliani,

noted front running Yankees fan and ticket freeloader. And while Fox literally delayed the start of every newscast on every one of its stations in the country, even on the West Coast, and Joe Buck and Tim McCarver kept showing replays again and again, and promising my interview with Roger Clemens, Rudy Giuliani took his goddamn time leaving the field. His idiot son Andrew grabbed some dirt from the field. I half expected him to eat it. Instead, he stuffed it

in his jacket pockets. Giuliani now waited for his entire entourage, one of his wives, some of his I guess they were friends, assorted political riff raff, and as my producer screamed in my ear, where is Clemens? Giuliani waited until they were all together on the field, and finally he marched them down into the dugout and up through the runway. And after all this delay, Clemens came out and finally I could ask him about throwing the bat shard at

or near piazza. And at that moment I remembered what I had learned about Clemens in Boston. If you started an interview with something controversial, he might very well walk away. If, on the other hand, you did the boring game outcome question, he would answer anything you asked, and he might even bring up anything controversial himself. But you had to do the stupid game stuff first, So which was harder work. Roger, I asked eight innings of two hit ball or watching

the Mets nearly tie it in the ninth. His answer was not bad, but he did not bring up the bat. So I asked another question about what he thought of his performance in that game. Well, that did it. He started talking about having to overcome his emotions in the first inning, and now I could say, well, since you brought up the emotions the bat throwing incident, did you throw that piece of broken bat at Mike Piazza. There is a freeze frame from that interview in which Roger

Clemens eyes are bugged wide open. Well, Glemons basically confirmed what the guys in the dugout had told me. He had told them. You can believe him or not, but he thought the thing he grabbed was the ball, and when it wasn't, he threw it away just in case the ball was somewhere else near him and he had to have a free hand with which to pick it up. He explained the chest taps he was indeed saying to the umpire Umpire Charlie, as Clemens called him, accompanying his

apologies to the umps for throwing the bat. He said he didn't even know where Piazza was at the point he threw the bat. It was as straight and nonpartisan and frankly, as informative an interview as I've ever conducted. Meanwhile, everybody else in that stadium, everybody else in that city, everybody else in the Tri State area, was convinced of

one of only two things. Roger Clemens had tried to impale Mike Piazza with a shard of his own bat, or the Mets were crybabies who could not tell that Clemens obviously did not try to impale Mike Piazza with his own bat. There was no middle ground. I found this out specifically the next day when the TV sports columnist of the New York Times, Rich Sandomir, who was a friend of mine, called to interview me about the interview.

Why didn't you ask him about the bat first? Nobody cared about how he pitched he threw a bat Piazza. I said, you're a Met fan, and I explained the theory of not making Clemens end an interview before he said what you needed to know. I went through the whole thing I just recited here. It was amazing to see those few days, how every sports reporter and columnist in New York self identified as either a Met fan or ex Met fan, or a Yankee fan or ex

Yankee fan. And you can still see it today as this story from twenty two years ago is recollected by others. They wrote what they felt as kids Clemens was the victim, or Clemens tried to kill Mike Piazza like he was a dracula, and they had the wooden steak to go through his heart. Meanwhile, we learned recently from Joe Torri, the Yankee manager, another one of my friends, that they all hid something from us that night, the thing about emotions.

After the incident in the first inning, Roger Clemens went back to the Yankee clubhouse and started to cry. This might have had something to do with embarrassment or grief. But since he had noted that he had had to check his emotions, I always thought, well, he might have been a little overamped for that game, naturally or otherwise.

All right, So before I present anything else out of chronological order, let me go back to the I thanked Roger Clemens for the interview and threw it back to Joe Buck and Tim McCarver in the Fox booth because this is when the real trouble started. They were pretty much done for the night, but I had another two hours to go in a live postgame show on Fox's

cable Sports network. We had about four minutes until that show started, and it suddenly occurred to me that although this was not the most important event in the history of the World Series, the bat would become part of

the iconography of baseball. I had been at Yankee Stadium often enough over the years to know the two kids who ran the visiting clubhouse, and right then they were still packing up the Mets bats and equipment, and the Mets dugout, so I ran over and asked the senior of them what happened to the pieces of the Piazza bat. The answer to that question has haunted me for twenty two years. It resulted in me being threatened with a

lawsuit by Mike Piazza. The owner of the Boston Red Sox said he was threatened by Piazza over the same bat. And then came the moment during that World Series that

Mike Piazza confronted me and we talked about restaurants. The rest of this crazy story after this, So back to our number one story on the countdown and the saga of the night in the two thousand World Series and all the nights since, when the bat of Mike Piazza of the Mets shattered should be and Roger Clemens of the Yankees picked up the barrel of that bat and tossed it at him, or just tossed it away having mistaken it for a baseball, or made up a story

that he had mistaken it for a baseball. And I was in the Yankee dugout as the reporter, and I was hosting the game for Fox, and I interviewed Clemens afterwards, and then before our two hour postgame show on Cable, I went over to the Met dugout and asked the clubhouse attendant there what happened to the pieces of Piazza's bat. Well. The guy explained that Bobby Valentine, the Mets manager, had asked that one of the pieces go to a friend of his in the stands, and he, the clubhouse attendant,

had handed it to the guy. A second piece he believed was kept by the Yankees. He wasn't sure about that. The third piece, the handle was where was it. Where is it? He asked the other attendant. It's here in the garbage, the kid said. I did a double take the garbage. Yeah, the kid said, under the dugout bench, and there it was, stuffed in amid all the empty bags of sunflower seeds and the crushed gatorade cuffs. I said,

what happens to it? Now? Gets thrown out? They clean out the dugouts first, so I said, look, can I borrow it? This would make a great prop for our postgame show? And the attendant says sure, and he pulls it out of the pile and hands it to him, just about seven inches of a baseball bat, and all there is is Piazza's uniform number thirty one written in magic marker on the bottom. Listen. I said, I won't be able to bring this back to you for like two hours. We're on for two hours. Will you still

be in the clubhouse? And he said, are you kidding? We have to be here at eight. He and I'll be out of here in ten minutes. And I said, you want me to bring it back to you for game three? And he says, garbage. You're going to bring back garbage? Throw it out, keep it whatever, what do I care? So I use the bat fragment as a prop in the show repeatedly, and I stuck it in my shoulder bag, and I thought, I'm not a scrounger, but this is a valuable piece of memorabilia and I'd

like to keep it. So either I'll auction it off for charity and bid against myself or something, or I'll make a donation to a baseball charity and I'll keep it. And that was it. And two days later, as the World Series shifted from Yankee Stadium to Shay Stadium, I got a phone call from one of the PR guys at Fox Sports. Did you see the paper? And I said, no, not yet. And he says, Piazza told the guy from Newsday that you stole his bat and he wants it back.

And I said, what if I hadn't asked about it, it would be on a garbage scale right now, being towed out to be dumped in the Atlantic Ocean. And he says, maybe so, but Piazza told this John Hayman, He's going to sue you to get it back. So now I go to the ballpark with extra excitement on my plate. I'm waiting for Mike Piazza to tell me he's going to sue me. So I go out onto the field.

I'm wondering how long it's going to be before I run into Piazza, And like two minutes after I step on the field, I turn around and he's walking towards me. He looks at me and he says, hey, Keith wild One the other night, huh say listen, when you lived at Shutters, did you ever eat at Ivy at the Shore in Santa Monica? Nothing about the bat. We're talking about restaurants in Santa Monica, California. And I say, well, yeah,

but did you ever eat at Shae Jay's. And a big smile from Piazza, Oh, man, I love Shade Jay's. I love Jay. Give me your number this winter when I'm home, Let's go eat at Shaye Jay's. And I said, I'll pay for it and I'll order the sand dabs. Now we're talking about sand dabs, how to prepare sand dabs at a restaurant. And then he says, hey, sorry, I gotta go ahead, have a good show. That was it. He's in the paper threatening to sue me. We see each other on on the field. He starts the conversation.

No mention of suing me, not one word. Next day in the paper, more Piazza quotes about how he's going to sue me for stealing his bat. Next night, Game four of the World Series, we're just about to go on the air with the pregame show, and now Piazza comes over again, coming in from the outfield to the dugout, and he says, hey, this must be really cool to do what you guys are doing. Have a great show. And by now the only thing I can think of. He does not know I'm the same Keith Olberman. He

keeps threatening to sue. So the World Series ends and the Yankees beat the Mets, and if you look for it, there's this photo of the traditional postgame awarding of the World Series Trophy and the Most Valuable Player award and its commissioner, Bud Selig and Derek Jeter, the Yankees and me, and just before it happened, George Steinbrenner was the owner of the Yankees. He's crying, leans in and I give

him a hug and reassure him. And he asked me if my mother went to the game, and I said, you know, my mother she'd never come to Shay Stadium. She hates it more than you do. And he says, I love her more than ever before. Now, So the series ends, and it's not been that greatest series, but it's been exciting and it was the dream from my childhood. And the Yankees have won and my friends are happy. And I've not heard another word about this lawsuit, nothing

from Mike Piazza. And I told the Fox people, well, if I'm not going to hear anything more from them, it's easy. I'm going to keep the bat and I'm going to donate twenty five thousand dollars to this charity, the Baseball Assistance Team, which helps ex ball players in financial need, because A I'm not a scrounger. B it's a great cause. C that's actually much more than the bat handle would be worth on the open market. And D the acronym for the Baseball Assistance Team is bat

bat and that's perfect. It's about Piazza's bat, you get it. And then nothing for a month, whereupon Fox gets another letter now from Piazza's agent fellow named Manzan and he threatens to sue again, and that's the end of it.

Never heard from him again. So now it's the next year, two thousand and one, and I'm back in New York working for CNN doing the news, and I go to a Mets game and I see Piazza and I give him a big smile and I offer my hand and I say, still all of those sand dabs from shayj And he just stares at me and walks right past me. And I see a cop I know who works next to the Mets dugout, and the cop says, Mike has been asking him about me? Is that Keith Olderman the

one who stole my bat? So now I'm not just keeping the bat. I want to sue Mike Piazza for being a pain in the ass. And then nine to eleven happens, and ball players are doing charity things, and sportscasters and newscasters are doing charity things, and I think, well, this is the time when the baseball season resumes. I throw the bat handle in my bag and I go out to a Mets game and I go up to Piazza's locker before the game, and I pull the bat chart out and I say, take this, Mike, auction it

off for charity. Let's do some good with this, or if it's too much trouble, you sign it and I'll auction it off. We can leave my name out of it, whatever you want, however you want to do it. And he looks at me like I've just insulted his mother and says, no, it's too complicated, and he turns away, and I think to myself, this is the strangest athlete I have ever met. And just before the season ends,

I go to another Mets game. Now this time it's one of his teammates who takes me aside and says, you know, Piazza never stops talking about you stealing his bat from the Clemens game last year. He says, he still wants to sue you. Didn't you try to give him the bat back in the clubhouse to auction off. Didn't I see that? And I say, yeah, I did, and he refused to take it. And the guy laughs and he says, great player, excellent catcher. I love him,

strangest player I have ever met. Comes two thousand and two, nothing happens. See Piazza at several Mets games. Nothing happens. Two thousand and three, nothing happens. Now I can't pin the year down on this. It's one of the Red

Sox Yankees' playoffs series either too thousand and three. We're two thousand and four and I'm leaving the field as they're clearing the media off just before the game starts, and I'm going out through the Red Sox dugout, literally at the same spot where the kid handed me Piazza's bat handle three or four years earlier, where the trouble all began. And I see the new owner of the Red Sox team approaching from the other end of the dugout, Keith John Henry, Nice to meet you. Have you got

a minute? And I said, well, yeah, they're kicking the media off the field, so and he laughs and he says I can take care of that. And he yells at the plane clothes coop and he says he's with me and the cop nods and John Henry, the owner of the Red Sox, and I sit down on the Red Sox bench before the start of a Red Sox Yankees playoff game, and there are no other reporters out there, and I think, Okay, what did I say about the

Red Sox? What is he pissed off about? Instead? John Henry says, can I ask you about Mike Piazza And I laugh and I say, sure, what about him? And he says, you have part of his bat from the World Series with Clemens right, And I say yeah, and he says, tell me the whole story. So I do what you've just heard, and John Henry says, that's what I was told, Thank you, huh. I thought it was me. So that other piece of the bat that was handed to a friend of Bobby Valentine's during that game, that

friend is a great friend of mine. And after nine to eleven he said, wouldn't it be great to get Mike Piazza to sign this and then we can auction it off for the victims' families or the cops or some other charity. And he gives me the bat and I call the Mets and they approach Mike and they call me and they say, Mike loves the idea and I should come to one of the spring training games

and he'll sign it. So the next March, I go to one of the Mets spring training games and I go up to him in the clubhouse and I introduce myself and he looks at me like I'm from Mars and I say, well, I brought the bat and he says what bat? And I explained that we had arranged to have him sign the bat from the World Series for a nine to eleven charity and he erupts at me, I'm not signing that bat? Sure for charity? You think

I was born yesterday? And say something to John Henry, owner of the Red Sox, like welcome to the club. Did he threaten to sue you too? And he laughs and says yes. That's the next part of the story. So while we're trying to straighten that out, his agent calls me and asks if I will give them the bat to auction off for charity, and I say sure, and I go to another Mets game and I go

to the clubhouse and I have the bat again. Now Piazza says, no, I can't take the bat because of pending litigation, but if I want him to, he'll sign it for me. All I have to do is come back a couple of weeks later. So this is what I wanted to ask Keith. Is he the strangest ballplayer you've ever met? Or is it just me? There's one more part to this. Flash forward to twenty fourteen, I still have the Piazza batthandle the one I unsuccessfully tried

to give back to Piazza. The middle portion, the one John Henry unsuccessfully tried to give back to Piazza, has been sold, with the proce going to charity. So where is the third piece, the barrel of the bat, the part that Clemens through at Piazza if you're a Met fan or was unfairly accused of throwing at Piazza if you're not a Met fan? And the answer finally arrives

in a sports memorabilia auction catalog that year. While one of the visiting bat boys was handing the middle part of the bat to a friend of Bobby Valentine and John Henry's in the stands, the barrel, which landed near the Yankee dugout, was scooped up by the Yankee bat boy, who put it in the pile of Yankee broken bats. And as it turned out, right at that point, the Yankee strengthen conditioning coach Jeff Mangold, who was on the bench, said, wait a minute, that's the pile of broken bats they're

going to throw out. They shouldn't throw it out. It's history. And he grabs that part of the Piazza bat and puts it up in his home office. And now it's fourteen years later and he wants to auction it off for charity. So he auctions it off, and I think, well, hell, it should be alongside the other piece of the bat. My other piece of the bat, the handle, win the auction. There it is on my wall, complete with a baseball

card showing Roger Clemens about to throw the barrel. Reasons left to your imagination, two thirds of the famous bat. I'll sell it someday, I'm sure, but I'll always have

the memories, my memories and John Henry's memories. And if you're wondering, No, unlike John Henry and I, that Yankee strength coach Jeff Mangold never tried to give it back to Piazza, or get it signed by Piazza, or auctioned off for charity with Piazza, which means that, on top of everything else, Jeff Mangold is smarter than John Henry and I put together. Yes, the story took three hours, but I think you'll agree it was worth it. Hello. Hello,

you're still there. Hello, HELLI I've done all the damage I can do here. Thank you for listening. Most of our countdown music was arranged, produced and performed by Brian Ray and John Phillip Schanel. Our musical directors have Countdown and it was produced by TKO Brothers. Mister Ray was on the guitars, bass and drums. Mister Chaneale handled orchestration and keyboards. Our satirical and fifty musical comments are by my friend and the best baseball stadium organist ever, Nancy Faust.

The Olderman theme from ESPN two written by Mitch Warren Davis Pier's Curtisy of ESPN, Inc. And it's the sports music. Other music arranged and performed by the group No Horns Allowed. My announcer today, keeping with the baseball theme was Tony Kornheiser. Everything else was as always my fault. That's countdown for today.

Day two hundred and eighty one of America held hostage again, just eighty two days until the scheduled end of his lame duck and lame brained term unless he is removed sooner by Maga and Epstein, or that patch of pavement on his hand, or a stuck escalator or a kopathy test or tail and all, or his jet made out of poop, or the arc he's building. He's building an arc. He thinks he's pronounced arc. He thinks arch is arc. Now he's fine, He's fine. The next scheduled countdown is Thursday.

Until then, I'm Keith Alderman. Good morning, good afternoon, good night, and good luck. Countdown with Keith Olderman is a production of iHeartRadio. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.