Long Train Running - podcast episode cover

Long Train Running

Aug 08, 20244 min
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Episode description

A record 81 years in the making Today's Odd News+ stories involve a train driver who has broken a unique record, plus advice on dealing with weeds and the deadly truth about birdwatching. >> Hear episodes from all the participants in Dog Days of Podcasting>> Support comedy4cast by becoming a patron on Patreon>> Or you can get Clinton a Dunkin' card or a cup of coffee via Ko-Fi>> Follow us on X, Instagram, Facebook, MeWe, Mastodon, and BlueSky>> Give us a call via the Super Secret Phone Line (213) 290-4451>> Drop us an email at podcast @ comedy4cast.com>> Also check out Clinton's other podcast, The Topic is Trek>> Certain sounds effects heard on comedy4cast are courtesy of freeSFX and FreeSound.org Click here for a transcript of this episode.

Transcript

The comedy4cast network. Let's dog ear that for now. This is comedy4cast, Episode 800, Long Train Running. It's time once again for the Dog Days of Podcasting, a call for podcasters to try to put out a podcast every day in August. For more information and to hear all the shows, go to dogdaysofpodcasting.com. Here at the comedy4cast studios, we've been working on a new format for this year's Dog Days. Sure, like in years past, there will be an actual odd news story, but that's not all.

So, let's get started with Odd News Plus. Here are our odd news stories for Thursday, August 8th, 2024. First up, it's time to check out the mid-aged farmer's almanac again. This tip is for people who find weeds in their flower gardens. The book reminds us that weeds are just like any other plant. It's just that they've ended up in a place where you don't want them. It suggests that the easiest way to solve this problem is to serve them with an eviction notice.

Now let's get to our actual for real odd news story. The Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority, or as it's more commonly known, the MBTA, or simply the T, or, as it is most commonly used in a sentence, F***ing T, where's my f***ing train? Now, where was I? Oh, right. An 81-year-old Boston woman who drives trains for the T was recently named the world's oldest train operator by Guinness World Records. Is that something you want to promote? I guess. Maybe.

Helen Antonucci started working for the MBTA in 1995 and has been driving blue line trains for nearly three decades. According to Antonucci, she started working for the T because she has five daughters and it was a way to get out of the house to catch some peace and quiet. I'm not sure that's quite the inspirational message your passengers want to hear. Hey, it was either this or working at the library.

And at the library, you have to stand up. A co-worker applied to Guinness World Records on her behalf. Antenucci didn't know about the application until the record was made official. That's either very nice of the co-worker or the most passive-aggressive shade ever thrown. You have got to be the world's oldest train operator. And now it's official. Bam! Here at Odd News Plus, we salute Antonucci and everyone who stays active and pursues their dreams.

We're sorry we couldn't be at the party, but the f***ing train was late. And finally, coming up tomorrow on Odd News Plus, birdwatching. Innocent hobby or voyeuristic crisis? To find out, we sent 19 lab mice out into the field, each outfitted with binoculars to investigate this burning question. Unfortunately, some of the mice were using the wrong end of the binoculars, so the hawks they were observing were way closer than they appeared to be. Remy and Hazelnut, you will be missed.

That about wraps it up for today's Odd News Plus. A big thanks to the comedy4cstg patrons for helping make this show possible. Story, voices, and original music by Clinton Alvord. Copyright 2024. All rights reserved. Talk to you next time. But for now, that's it. We're done, done, done, done, done. Bye-bye. Music.

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