Comedy Central Podcast. You heard my name is Jorge Guerra. If there' s anyone who hasn' t found out I' m a deaf mute, something you can read here. In addition, the first with j has written it well the second with g is seen that this rock ended FP and such when I present myself I usually go to the point and say that I am metro asexual, that here many people stay like this thinking and I know that it is curious a guy that reproduces by geming, not even by spores more
than I am metro asexual. It' s just that I give up my hair, but I don' t fuck and where' s the fun. You know. I' ve come to think that it' s because of me that I have something to do with it. I also think that living in Valladolid, because look bad boy of many. You know or if you know the fame that girls have in Valladolid, I see that there is not a group on Facebook that says I once said hello to a girl from Valladolid
and I almost took a host. I mean, I mean, if I get the fuck out of here without fucking saying hello, you know what? Another day I spend an aunt, I say later I throw myself out, I get a shit. I say Maribel, I' m your fucking brother to see that. You go to Valladolid, you meet an aunt, you give her two kisses and she makes you the cobra. I mean, it ' s not normal. You put a computer on the Internet in Valladolid.
When you get the typical banner this of looking sluts in your area. I always give to the one who does and I leave the circle to this looking, searching, searching and in the end you send me alamanca. You know that' s not a dick. I also told you I was waxing. This isn' t about hobby. I' m saying it' s not about hobby and there are guys who wax more and more. I know because you don' t see hair in your urinals anymore, but mine is out of necessity. You know, I was going for a man. I stayed
in a fucking monkey. Go say the human body seventy percent water. I must be dry. You know, I don' t see my feet, I mean fuck if I' m a hobbit. You know I can' t go out in summer for a walk in my flip flops without being laughed at I' m told where you' re going. That' s where the bite is on the other side, so then they tell me the human body is the perfect machine of shit. That' s why I' m getting bald and I have hairs on my shoulders, so start using the gel
for my head. Shampoo to the rest of the body pussy. Then you know the champuache that head and shoulders, if the only guy who used champu with a criterion. I' m much more concerned about the hair that comes out in places where I shouldn' t have hairs on my back, which is that I look like a kiwi. All I mean, I sweat and he turns his back on me like he' s cool with the quick watering lawn. You know, it' s mud, because seriously, my ass has hairs. You know, they call him bald a lot. I can
' t, you know. I crouch here, you think you' re seeing an iwak with mumps. You know. It' s very frustrating when I go with the coleras with the car. We do the typical thing that guys do about pulling their asses out the window, that we do. You don' t know how frustrating it is to get ahead of you with a car and far from offending, it' s funny, look at a doggy, look out and I' m going to throw it away. But now that you know my name, you know where I' m from. You
know I' m padded. I' m gonna be more serious. I ' m going to talk about my real profession, and I' m a veterinarian. Right, I took the race a long time ago. I think the money had something to do with all this, and I' m glad it' s already a professor. You know all that that by the laughs I reduce that there is more than one graduate around here, because it is curious, like everyone assumes that, by the fact of being a veterinarian,
I have to know everything about all the animals on earth. I mean, they' ve come to ask me, I promise you, I hear Jorge seen in a documentary that the furry Argentine armadillo, in long periods of starvation, can become scavengers. That' s true. I' m so fucking sorry, so go fucking vet. I don' t know if you think there are armadillo- type subjects in the race, not for citizenship. They don' t give you credit. No, fuck you, you know it
happens to me. It happens a lot when they know I' m a veterinarian, they tell me ah vet, because my pussy has a cat MM and there' s a pause. Not like waiting for my reaction, like I gave a shit about the cat and the wedge. It' s like I see a fucking computer, because my father has a mac but a half. How you stayed there, but I fice uh, you fuck, I worked at a veterinary clinic. I remember that the typical sign came with his pet, a dog or a cat, because you know that people are not
dogs or cats. Then they tell me you' re a sea of dogs or a cat. I mean, don' t call it weird, but I' ve had beef chops. You know, the typical lady came to me with her dog, a little dog, an ugly thing. I didn ' t know if a dog, a pendriife that shit and for her he ' s a gorgeous dog and he' s the smartest thing in the world. He tells me if my animal is smart I put my shoes on, I put on my coat, I take the leash and you know we go to the street and I say smell it eh who it will have gone out
to. But deep down, that sincere lady, because imagine of the lady who puts on her shoes, puts on her coat, grabs the leash, goes to the door of the street sorry, goes the sofa and lies down. You know, you have to be a lying bitch to make an anime. That' s not done. Those like when you hook up a dick and it' s got a tail. Those things aren' t done. But I want to ask you one thing as a vet, and it'
s to leave and ask us stupid questions. You know, I understand that if you have a professional friend, ask questions about respect, especially if computer science complains a lot about questions. I have a professional friend, the Civil Guard. I recognize that I ask you a lot of questions, guy where are you going to put control tonight from how many grams is jail? It ' s true that you don' t pay in the putis things like that,
no, but the vets. Thanks to veterinarians you ask us a lot of absurd questions and I' ve made a list of real questions that I ' ve been asked throughout my life. I tell you, Jorge, Jorge, because they talk like that when I get pre- George, listen to the dots that my bitch has in her belly. They' re bad, I can cut them off. They' re nipples, Jorge, animals fart. I say clearly they fart, but they don' t always have to be blamed. Asume, Jorge, I have one or something that doesn'
t eat me anything. I tried thinking, I tried cans. I' ve taken him to eat eggnogs and I don' t know what. You recommend that by giving him ten euros and you want to buy him you know, Jorge, I could put my freshwater fish in a saltwater aquarium I don ' t know why you can, but they would cook their eyes. Effect, after Jorge, why dogs' hives smell of feet. Like this, I don' t know. This is one of those things you have to believe. It' s not like the sperm you' re winged about telling
me and continuing. Jorge, it' s true that if you give chocolate to dogs they become blind. This is completely true. But, like people, it' s not right to give them joints. And Jorge, it ' s true that drug dogs get drugs. That' s true. Uh, and the best- kept secret is that the agents are all there, too. But, well, I finished the race to get on with my life and I decided to go to work abroad, to England, and I
say I decided to mark it because it was my choice. Not like now that a lot of people are gonna have to throw' cause they' re really bad. I ate in the feeling the poor is true is fatal. You put work on Google. You don' t even get the lucky button, you know. You hit the whole thing there and it comes out looking for you, searching and I' m going to be sent to Salamanca looking. You don' t get that, I mean. Maybe he meant downstairs, maybe he meant it' s going well. Then he redirects you to
Google Maps and sends the fuck straight to you. Well. I saw they needed vets in Yort and I went there. I didn' t know much about that town, but the basics aren' t ham and they have a duchess. I mean, if I get paid in black, they' ll embroider it. I say there to the office receives me boss hallow Hor Yo and Gover we the King hor YouTube i e at last things hout youdo and you didn' t just ask me this already because they are very polite.
The English are like very correct, a roll in reverse of what happens in Spain. Not that the rock falls on you, you fall for it, but you get drunk and you fall for it. You don' t in the English fall from fucking mothers to drunks and say fuck what' s miserable. You know who educates them. The truth is that they educate you very well in the sorry, but that they are small all sorrys want something,
sorry you want a bad Shorry beer. Here they educate us more at the Please, you want something and the mother tells you and how they say it. You say please and you take it away not what happens that they maintain this education until they are older, we lose it and if you don' t realize like when we ask for time on the street, no, I mean, what ways are those that come to you a fact, I have time. No, man, you don' t know. I have the dilemma that I say if I tell him I' m not taking a shit,
I' m gonna freak him out. If I tell you if you ' re going to take my watch off, I mean, my solution is that you say it. Hey, what do you say? That' s how the Spaniards have no idea what England is at a geographical level. I mean, I lived in a city called Stocon Trent, which probably doesn'
t sound like it. Don' t worry about the English either, I mean it' s not serious, those in Terue, the British no, but I was this with trend is famous because yesterday Robbie Williams and the captain of the Titanic, a certain john Smith, who I say looks capped that the same ton of a boat that makes you a pair of slippers. You know, I mean, don' t look at the East guy from Italy, the Concordia Coast guy. That frame a jones made me in full swing.
I didn' t fuck with you on a boat and then the bastard got his ass kicked out, because I remember he was in this thing with a train that, I repeat, is north and calls me a bird. My mother picked up the phone. Jorge told me, you' re okay, something happened to you. He' s here. I say thank you for calling Mom, but it happened. You know it' s so serious and tell me it says nothing that they' ve planted bombs in London.
I' m saying you' re worried about the blast wave, so they put shrapnel on it or something so you can see that we have no idea what England is at the geographic level. Notice as everyone who leaves in England and no matter where, no matter what. The north of the south, the east, the west becomes that of London. That' s right. I' ve been London' s colleague. For my mother, he was the son of London. You had to see your proud friends by now. There is, then, a son who is in London and I am not
a mother. I saw well this with trend that is near Manchester. So that' s why I have a son who' s doing a Manchester in London. Sometimes, and before I say goodbye to you, I want to make a reminder to an English woman who already left us, but well, it was pretty important. Not Margaret Ttcher, and I want to remember her to reassure all those monarchists here in the room who watch TV because I guess they' re worried, because they think that if this woman being the iron
lady, then in the end it didn' t go so well. No and of course, we king with so much operation, so much fall, well, but I want to reassure you because he will not be of iron. But fuck our titanium kings, that holds much longer. So, thank you so much for your attention. Thank you very much.