Release and Rekindle

the most random things that mean everything. Because when I look back on my life, it's those moments that were so simple. I call it simple happiness that I missed so much. With those I can't create it no more so that simple happiness bug has bit me, and I'm like super excited about creating simple moments that mean everything.

I don't want all their attention. And I think honestly that instilled a fear of success for me my whole entire life, even now working through this, because it's like, man, if I'm successful, like what am I going to lose? Are people going to be jealous? Or all these things? And so I had to work through that limited belief.

And my biggest adversity was sports man after college, you know, going to NFL as a free agent and bouncing around getting cut eight or nine times, being very unsure of my situation, you know, day to day, you know, coming off the practice field and getting released and like, oh, what I'm going to do now? So that was tough, and that process me just having a son, like how am I going to provide for my son? Who am

I without the sport? So that was the hardest thing of my life, trying to find an identity outside of something that's been my identity my whole life.

really resonated with me on a lot of levels. Just I had that same thing growing up, and how to a brother a year and a half older than me who achieved a ton of success, like more than most athletically, let's say, but maybe compared to me, it wasn't as successful, And so oftentimes I would find myself very uncomfortable receiving that acknowledgment, and I've seen that show up in my life later on, where when I am acknowledged, I often want to diminish or dim my light, if you will.

So I'm curious for you, like, how have you seen that show.

you know what I mean? Like I should be able to under those blessings and feel good about it because the people in my life that are truly happy for me, they're going to be happy for my success, happy for my happiness. And I realized that the wrong people, yeah, they might have a problem with it, and that those

aren't my people. And so I've learned to really acknowledge it I've learned to accept it, and it's really helped me because I felt like in me not accepting the recognition or whatever it may be, it was almost like my purpose and my gift became a burden in a sense, and I was like, I never wanted that to be a thing. So I acknowledge it, but always point it back to God as the reason of who I am and the purpose he asked for my life. And that's

really helped me. But to be totally transparent something I struggle with to this day.

I'm pouring in everybody else. I'm making sure everybody else is straight, and I'm not giving that to myself, right And so I'm kind of the season right now, and it seems like a selfish season, but it's not as more self aware. It's just like being my unapologetically, my unapologetic season where I'm really focusing on me so I can be the best me for the world, for the people who follow me, for my family, and making sure that I'm giving to myself what I'm trying to instill

in them. So it's a process, man, that I'm working through. But I realized when I didn't do that, my cup was super empty and I was running on fumes. So I think it's important to sit back and relax, have time to disconnect for yourself. And so for me that's early in the morning, late at night. I call it reflection therapy. To be able to give myself in my life what I need.

the time. Like we are in this work with you every single day.

and I'm sharing my journey with you. Yes, it's some things I might know a little bit more about, but I'm sharing and being an open book. And I think that's what you know you talked about the sixty million. I think that's what has allowed me to be successful is I'm not at the mountaintop telling you how to get up here, right even if I've been up there, cool,

but I'm like back down this struggle with you. And so even over the last few years, me being open and sharing my journey of like, this is what I'm dealing with, this is what I'm going through, but also this is how I'm getting through it in real time. And I know that builds a connection with those that follow you, those that watch you, because it's like we're inspired by perfection, but we're impacted through truth, through purpose,

through progression. So I'm always trying to show people like, yeah, this is what I'm going through right now, and this is how I'm getting through it, no doubt.

I know there are a lot of people out there that may have certain dreams or see themselves doing certain things, and for some reason or another, they have to go into a different direction, and that separation is tough, That transition is tough. Can you speak to some of the emotions that come and what it looked like practically to kind of cut your way through everything that may have been trying to hold you right where you were.

our life. I know I didn't at that time. Simply put, for me, it came with me facing my reality first, right, my reality is that this is over my realities. I don't even love it no more my realities. I'm just in it because I don't know what else to do with my life, and so there has to be another chapter. And my biggest fear man was not having another chapter to my life outside of this, and so I faced that reality. I dealt with it. Always say you'll never

win your war by running from your battle. So that was hard. And then after I faced my reality to release some things in my life, you know, and whatever that looked like at the time, maybe it was my circle, maybe it was the identity, and I had to burn those bridges where I knew I couldn't go back. I had to move forward. The last part of the process is the repair process. And you know, we have these voids in our life, but we have to be able to repair, and repair to me means putting the strength

back into a weakness. And that was a very hard process, but I ended up finding my purpose. I said, okay, well, what qualities can I take from this thing that I spent so much of my life on and apply this to my real life perseverance, endurance, how to deal with adversity, hard work, all the things that we learn as athletes. And I say, you know what, I want to put

this into my current work. And at first, you know, it wasn't nothing happening, right, It wasn't like it was an external like validation and this is it for your life. But I always tell people this and simply put for me, because I get this question a lot, like how did you know like this transition was right for you? And the best way I can put it is it was the piece in the midst of uncertainty, in the midst of chaos in my soul that I knew this was what I was created to do, even though there was

no external like validation of it. Internally, I knew that this was I was created to do. And once I really locked into that and stripped away, and I'm still stripping away, like I still miss sports. I still that's why I tore my achilles now thinking I'm an athlete still and trying to play my nephew outside in basketball in that rupture. But I'm still working through that process.

But now I realize that, man, you know, there is something more to my life because I listened to that piece and not necessarily my circumstances at that time.

that was the moment. It was like progressing and gaining these spiritual tools, becoming a yoga teacher, becoming a coach, and then ultimately sharing my story, sharing the pain, sharing the shit. That was the moment that I shared that at this event, like everything changed for me. But I'm so grateful that I was able to find a way out because I work with and talk to so many people that haven't found a way out or never found a way out and ultimately ended their lives through addiction

or mental health or suicide because of it. So for me to be sitting on here with you two and just knowing Trent, you're.

that I care about. WHI while I have this platform, I'm going to push these things, Like is it tough doing that, you know, like, is it ever from the fans like, oh, like you should be focused on this or that, or you should be a football player because I know the box put like, how how do you handle that part of it? I'm just curious. Yeah, there is that. That is a reality.

And I was playing every game and doing well, and people were like, oh, the music is the music is dope, Like they're playing in the stadium, Like nobody was really saying anything.

I'm gonna let you live. I'm gonna let you do what you do. But if you're not, nah, we need to we need to stick to your day job. And you know, people don't really know that I'm not doing the music to be popular or to have this brand. Like this is just me doing something that I love to do, I would do for free, I would do if I never posted it again. And it's just a great balance from everything that football demands, you know. And so I've received that. I've received that with a lot

of things. And you got to kind of learn to focus in and be like a lot of these people are came in because of the performance.

your fans and support you and and all that. But it's all learning, it's all recognizing like, okay, like this is what it is.

you do everything. And so I'm going to be excellent in everything that I do and not short one area to put more time and effort into another, and just stand tall on my convictions and feel good about what I see when I look in the mirror. And because I spent way too much of my life worried about what other people's opinions were of me.

touched on. Well, when I hear you so clearly articulate how you stay focused, how you find your center, like that shit doesn't happen overnight, and it doesn't it doesn't come with a ton of work and discipline and focus and whatever the practices are that you've had, and continue it, continue to level up to find those practices right to be able to eliminate the noise, and yeah, the dedication that you've had to find that and a lot of it is also getting to the core wound of this

like not enough, not black enough, different story, right, And I wanted to actually segue that into trends story because I think Trent, I've heard you say before that the first time that you ever felt like you weren't enough was when you got drafted, right.

what's up? And at that moment, I was like, man, maybe I'm not cut out for this. And I went through a little bit of what I now know like a small form of depression until my phone rang, you know, as a hot paraty free agent, and then that that shift happened. Even going in there, you know, you're starting off the bottom of the totem poles. So even then I'm like, man, like, am I even supposed to be here?

It's like the first time in my life where I questioned my skills, my ability, and just myself in general.

self care, right, that was my thing. I'm just taking care of myself, right, that's the self care that I thought was self care at the time, But really it was me running from my reality at the time, and my lowest point had to be well two thousand and nine, and you know I've told this story before, but you know, I was with the Seahawks that released me, and I was back home in Dallas. They called me and say, hey, like we want you to come, you know, up here.

So I rush home from Dallas to Fortworth. It's about like a forty five minute drive through some stuff in the suitcase. You know, I'm on Facebook at the time. Tell everybody I'm going back, you know, I tell my parents, everybody's happy. I get to the airport, and I can laugh about it now. I wasn't laughing at but I can get to the airport, and I get to the airport and you know that two o six number calls and I'm like it's weird, okay, hey this like have

you left yet? And I was like nah, and it was like, well, we have the plans on things like don't leave, like we'll bring you back later, and they never brought me back. So at that moment, I was like, like, I was so hurt, and I was like, man, you know, I felt like that door had shut. I didn't love the game anymore or anything like that, and I just really felt like, man, you know what, I'm just gonna live my life. I'm gonna just do the things that

I know make me feel good. And I ran to those things, and obviously that just feeled avoid temporarily and doed me in a deeper depression.

of your lines. I mean, there's a lot of stuff as I'm revisiting our conversation and just how much First I want to just reac anology for how much of an inspiration you've been in my life and always showing up and then watching you on stage live, Like, there's a lot of motivational speakers out there, but Trent's like on a whole other level in addition to the level of authenticity just his stage presence and then what he's talking about is I mean, you've always just spoken right

right straight to my heart. So thank you for that, man, and.

this dark work over time. And so whether it's sports or whether it's mentally it's the prayers, is to getting into your word's to reading the books and things that aren't sexy that nobody sees. It's the working on your craft. It's to being addicted to the mastery right in your craft and really putting your best foot forward with music,

whatever it may be, and nobody sees that process. But then those are the things that really help you shine the light, right, those are the things that people celebrate you for, and those are things that people recognize you for. So the dark work isn't sexy. I always say, progression is an ugly role that leads to a beautiful place. So now I get this all the time, bro, Like

they're like, oh man, your overnight success. It's like what I've been doing this since two thousand and nine, Like go look at the dark work of the videos on YouTube where I'm like, ah, that's terrible, but I was still proud of myself for stepping into that moment. So that dark work, man, is the things that aren't celebrated, But it's the reason that people will celebrate you. You know maybe in two or three years or a year when that harvest actually comes from the seed that you plan it.

It's just kind of in us as human beings. But I love that term and that idea because if we could get that into young people earlier on, like this pain, this suffering isn't breaking you, it's not gonna keep you down. It's actually gonna help you build. It's actually gonna help lay a foundation for anything that you're going to try to do, anything that you any challenge you may come across.

If we could just circulate that message, I feel like that could go a long way, more than anything else you may explain, just like, hey, when you get to something hard, go through it, stick with it, embrace because one day you're going to look back on it and be grateful for it, as opposed to run from it or numb from it. It's a big deal because it's

all across my story. I'm a drug addict and alcoholic in recovery because my addiction form because I didn't want to feel things like That's really the basis behind my using was I just don't want to go through that. I don't want to feel this, get rid of this as soon as possible. I don't want to have to sit with it and deal with it and work through it. And that's why I feel like this. Just the messaging behind that is so universal. And I had to get you to speak on that for a couple of minutes.

order to get to certain things in our life. And so I've been trying to even with myself and my kids and the athletes I'm around are just people in general, Like you know, there's certain things that You've got to go through to be able to get to the thing that you want. So this is a part of it.

So enjoy it, you know, I mean celebrate it. And you know, sometimes it's hard for people that accept that, but you know, I think when they look back and realize, like, oh, this is the sacrifice I got to make in order to get this, and they realize, you know, like this is a part of the process in order to be great, it.

what really changed it for me? You know when you see man stuff, when you see your mom you know, for six months, you know, in hospice, and she's still keeping faith. Like she had brain cancer, she had breast cancer, she had liver cancer, and she's still keeping her faith. And it's like this is a different type of faith that I've never seen. She's still thanking God even when she's dying. And the day that she passed, you know, I got to call at four him in the morning.

I already knew what it was. My dad called me and I went over there and I had just seen her two days before that and she had her hardest day, like she was struggling to breathe everything, Like I thought I was gonna lose her in that moment. And when I went over there after she passed, just looked at so much at peace. And the thing that I told my mom on that Friday before she passed, I said, Mom, you're healing. You know what I mean, It's okay, you're healing.

You don't have to fight like you're healing it's good. And she left that Saturday night early Sunday morning. And when you see somebody you know with a body bag and put it in the you know, the hearse, it's just reality. And so I made my mom this promise to take care of everybody, and I put that burden on myself and I wasn't even allowing myself to heal because I was making sure everybody else was okay. And it got to a point, man, where I was looking in the mirror one day, and this is what really

turned I call it my grief into my greatness. And there's days, bro even today, like when I'm about being on stage, let me text my mom, or fourth of July, like I'm like, dang, it's the reality is she's not here, but she's still here more than ever. And I remember, probably a year after she passed, Man, I was in the bathroom and I remember looking in the mirror and I was at a very very very low point, very

low point. Nobody would know because I was smiling for the camera, you know, but I was really dying behind the scenes, as I say, And I just had this thought and I thought about my kids, and I said, man passed away. I wouldn't want to be the reason why my kids gave up. I wouldn't want to be the reason why they lived in the depression. I wouldn't want to be the reason why they stopped going hard like I would want to be the reason why they went harder. You know what I mean? Do it for daddy,

You know what I mean. Let's go. And I sat there and I said, man, my mom was such like she worried about everything, bro Like she would call me like like I pray for you to take out the treasure you okay, Like she worried about everything. So I said, I know my mom is worrying right now if she can hap you know, happen to be able to see this right she's worrying. She's sad because her baby boy

and even her boys like they're giving up. And at that moment, I said, man, I felt these words and I don't know if it's true to certainly, I said my mother, Mom, I know you can't rest in peace UNCEI I'm living in peace. And that switched everything for me. I said, now was the moment where yes, I'm gonna go through my hard times with grief, but I'm gonna make sure she stays alive forever. I'm gonna make sure

the legacy is carried on. I'm gonna make sure generations have we have generational healing, generational health, you know what I mean. I'm gonna make sure of that. Because she ran this race of life and I refuse to allow that race to be in vain. I need to do my part. So I got the baton and at that moment it changed everything for me, just like that, And now the tears are happy instead of sad tears.

Those those three questions that you'll you'll ask maybe if you're needing, if you're stuck, or you're needing a perspective shift with how am I going to respond what does this mean to you? Or what does this mean to me? And then how am I going to use it? And then maybe touch on that last piece where you say, instead of saying what does this mean, it's what is this going to mean?

it will get better. And that helps me shift into my power of my in my perspective and so perspective I like to tell people it's like a set of lenses, right, it's like you're set of lenses of how you see the world. We can't control the experiences most times, we can control the meaning we give to the experience. So I always say, like, life is not about what happens to you, It's about the meaning that you give it, right,

It's about how you use it. If you're down at halftime, you're not going to be like all this means that you know, we ain't coming back as an athlete, we know now this means we're gonna have a comeback. That's what this means. We're gonna mean the Patriots with Atlanta. This means we have the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history, you know. So that is kind of the mindset that I've taken to everything in my life. When something happens, that's that's different right there.

present to the fact that there is one. We're not present to the fight that is there right in front of our face for us to take that perspective anytime that we want to.

are people just not focused on the right things? Are people like? Are we eternally distracted in a way? What do you think that that speaks to? Yeah, I think you hear the nail on the head. I think we are distracted. I mean more than ever. Right, we live in a world.

not fulfilled in life. And I've had the opposite where yeah, I'm not checking off all the boxes as far as in the world's eyes, but I'm checking off all the boxes that I care about in my life. Kind of what you talked about earlier, what you're doing music and the things that you care about the podcast. You're checking off those boxes. So you're having that sense of fulfillment, that sense of meaning, like I'm doing the things that

mean something to me with my mother. And it's funny you mentioned that, man, because I'm currently writing my book Protect Your Piece, and I talk about that in the process of like even the athletes, I say, you see the athlete that has peace in the big moment, like maybe the last second shot, it'd be Jordan or whatever. It may be or the big time catch, you know, and fourth down, it's just like they have pieces because they prepare for that, right, they position themselves for that

over and over and over. They suffered in those practices for that. And so when I look at my mom's life, Yeah, she died in peace because she lived in priority. Right, she died in peace because she lived in priority. So like the things that matter to her, she did those things. She spent time with her kids, right, she instilled the things in her kids that she wanted to instill. She had the values, and like she lived a life by that.

And I took that and one of the things that I tell people today and it kind of hits people in the heart, and I say, you know, the thing that I realized with my mother because when she died, like I was in my phone, like I was listening to like even like the Jay Electric Jee Electronicals on with Jayzon. I don't know if you heard it, but it's like literally to the tea of what I was

dealing with. Like I'm scrolling texts all day long, like trying to find things my mom left me, and then it hit me, It's like it's not by what she left for you. It's about what she left in you and her car went back to the dealership, right. Her jewelry got dispersed through her family, her clos are still there, like all the things, all the possessions, like they didn't go with her, you know what I mean. So I realized, like, wow, what did live on is everything she's putting us. And

so this quote I created from this. Your life is not multiplied through your possessions. It's multiplied through your purpose. So if we want to multiply our life, we want to continue to live on, we want to continue to create change even when we're no longer here. It's all about purpose, because our possessions die when we die. Right.

So that's really taught me a lot about that process of like what matters most, what's going to live on even when I move on, you know, and transition and so oh yeah, man, it's something that I'm trying to live by day by day.

So peace is being able to let go of controlling situations and just be good with just trusting the process, being good with trusting God's playing for your life, and say, you know what, everything is going to work out. Peace doesn't mean the storm doesn't exist. Right, It's not naive to say, oh, the storm doesn't exist. No, the storm exists. But I have peace and knowing the storm show path that's where my peace comes in. So I can learn

how to dance in the rain. I can have that gardener's mindset and celebrate the rain because I understand that the rain, just like in the real world with a gardener, it's growing the garden and it's also growing things in my life. It's growing my faith, it's growing my perseverance, my endurance, it's growing my what me folks on what really matters. And so it's non principles in the book Throbbing in the Chaotic World, and you know, it's broken down in three sections. So I break down protect your

peace in these three sections. The first is protect your energy, right. I mean we do that by disconnecting often, we do that by setting boundaries. We do that by doing our worth. We give energy away so freely and as if we have an infinite amount. That's why we live in a world full the burnout. We live in a world full of stress because we're not taking care of our energy. The second part of the book is protect your mind. Right.

That is kind of what we talk about. What's your perspective, what's your vision right, the things that you want to do. Protecting that because the world, as we know, is going to tell you that you shouldn't be doing this, you shouldn't be doing that's impossible, So it's about really protecting that. And then the last part is protect your soul. And that's the deep work of you know, as I call it soul fulfillment. That's the deep work of creating simple happiness.

And where I learned that from is looking at my kids, I'm like, where did we get to? Where we made happin is so hard to obtain, right, Like we got to have all these things checked off to be happy. And if you look at the people who are have the most, and there's a thing what like you know you happiness works off of what's happened, and I kind

of I agree with that to an extent. But the kind of happens I'm talking about is that internal happiness that more like joy that doesn't depend on what's happening in your life. So you look at your kids and I call it morning Marley. So that's my baby girl. And I wrote this in the book because it was a morning that she does this all the time. She came in our room and said, it's morning. This morning,

she loved up. She was so happy it was morning, and it clicked like, Man, I want that type of joy where I just wake up and be happy that it's just morning time. And I just studied her and just watched it that whole day and she just happy for the flowers and the things that as we grow up as adults we overlook and we take for granted, and so the whole book is just really bringing people back home to their soul and in such a chaotic world.

I think Nipsey said it best right, and I don't know if it's his cool, but I know that, you know, I saw the video and he said, you know, would you rather be at peace with the world and at war with yourself or vice versa? Be at peace with yourself and at war with the world. And that's what protecting your piece is all about. In the nutshell, it's being at peace with yourself no matter what's going on, you and everything is going to be okay and workout. Man. Thank you, Trent.