The views and opinions expressed in Cold and Missing are exclusively those of the hosts. All parties mentioned are considered innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Cold and Missing also contains adult themes and languages. Listener discretion is advised. I'm your host, Ali McLaughlin-Sulkowski. And I'm your co-host, Eli Sulkowski. And this is Cold and Missing, where we cover cold cases. And missing person cases. Hello everyone and welcome back to Cold and Missing.
I'm your host, Ali. And I'm your co-host, Eli. Welcome back everyone. Thank you so much for hanging with us. Last week it was the 4th of July here in the U.S. of A. And every time we sat down to record, fireworks would start going off in our neighborhood. But we're back this week and we are, I still can't believe it, being in the 90s like numbers wise for episodes. But we are on episode 94. Yep, episode 94 and this is a missing person case. Alrighty, let's get into it.
So just as a quick content warning at the top, this case does involve a young person. Today we are talking about the missing person case of Shy’Kemmia Pate. And this takes place in Unidilla, Georgia in September of 1998. But first, a little bit about Shy’Kemmia. Shy’Kemmia, or ShyShy as she was known to her family and friends, so you'll hear me call her both throughout the podcast. She's only 8 years old in 1998. She had just started 3rd grade at Unidilla Elementary School.
ShyShy is a tough little girl. She has severe asthma at this time that required her to have at home breathing treatments. She had an underdeveloped kidney and a weak bladder. At this time in 1998 she had to wear pull up diapers due to the weak bladder, otherwise she would have had to use the bathroom every 10 to 15 minutes. ShyShy also wore a brace on her leg due to a displaced kneecap. Her little body was working hard, which often left her feeling tired.
Despite all of this, she is a joyful, happy, and outgoing child. She loves skating and fashion. Her family was involved in their local church and ShyShy sang in the choir. The family live in a close community. The neighborhood is often buzzing with people, folks sitting outside playing card games, kids running around playing. The family lived across the street from the Roxy Club. A nightclub where people often spent time out on the porch drinking and playing games.
The Roxy Club tended to bring a rougher crowd. Down the line, the Roxy Club will be shut down when the owners are shot and killed in a robbery. In 1998, Shy’Kemmia is 4 foot, 4 inches, 59 pounds, and wore her hair in long braids with curls in the front. She had about 12 golden beads in her hair at this time. She also has a surgical scar along her waist. And now, a timeline of events.
During the last week of August in 1998, ShyShy suffers a severe asthma attack that actually ends up putting her in the hospital. However, by Friday, September 4th, she is back to her usual playful self. From my research, it seems that ShyShy spends the late afternoon and early evening hours playing outside. She is wearing a neon green Braves jersey where the word Braves is written in red letters, black or blue jeans, and white K-Swiss tennis shoes.
That evening, there was a plan to attend the high school football game in a neighboring town. Her older 17-year-old sister was on the drill team and needed to be there. ShyShy's older sister also needed to put gas in the car before heading out. She decided to go fill up her car with gas and then swing back by and grab her little sister. When she gets in her car, Shy’Kemmia is sitting on the family's front porch. The sisters wave at each other.
Years later, her sister will recall, quote, I was just going to get the gas and come back and get her. I wish I would have stopped, end quote. When her sister returns a few minutes later, Shy’Kemmia is gone. The last time that ShyShy is seen varies from report to report. It seems like she was last seen around 730, although a few newspapers say that a neighbor saw her around 820 p.m. So sometime between 730 and 820 seems to be the time where ShyShy is last seen.
By all accounts, though, ShyShy was last seen very close to her home, just a few yards away. When Shy’Kemmia‘s older sister comes back and sees that ShyShy is gone, panic doesn't set in right away. This was a small town, and it would have been normal for ShyShy to decide to ride with a friend's family over to the game. However, as the sister arrives at the game and no one has seen ShyShy, panic starts to set in.
Her sister years later will say, quote, I got home from the game and when I didn't see ShyShy, I asked my mom where she was and she said she wasn't home, end quote. The family begins searching for ShyShy, still assuming that she had just skipped the game and was with a friend. But as more and more people haven't seen her in hours, the panic starts to reach a threshold. Her sister says, quote, around 10 o'clock we still hadn't found her. Nobody had heard from her, end quote.
Now it's reported online that when the family first attempts to report her missing, they're told incorrectly that they needed to wait 24 hours before the police can start an investigation. However, within hours, the family pushes and gets the report made. Once police are taking it seriously, a massive search is launched starting at the family home and spanning outward through the neighborhood. But police are already hours behind ShyShy and her abductor.
Police first zero in on the Roxy Club during their canvas. They assumed that one of the many patrons who routinely sat out on the porch would have seen little ShyShy in her neon green shirt. But nobody had seen anything. Police are able to rule her father out quickly as he was serving time. Her dad, Chris Foster, still tried to help investigators in any way that he could, answering any questions and giving any information that he had. Quote, that's my baby. That's my heart.
We were a lot more than father and daughter. We were the best of friends. End quote. Over the next week, police will launch helicopters, deploy ATVs, and send out every available officer to search the neighborhood. Neighbors will willingly let police search their homes, anything that can be done to help bring ShyShy home. The FBI and the Georgia Bureau of Investigation get involved pretty quickly in her case. And quickly, the search for ShyShy becomes the largest search in Dooley County history.
Neighbors and her elementary school tie pink ribbons to their trees and doors to show support for her and her family. To this day, Veronica, ShyShy's mother, has a pink ribbon hanging on her door. By September 11, 1998, ShyShy has been missing for a week at this point. A $15,000 reward is offered for information leading to her safe return home. Police continue to work the case, following up on any lead they get.
But by October 11, so it's been over a month now since Shy’Kemmia disappeared, and police are still baffled. Investigators are still searching all over Dooley County for her. The last few days, police have been searching land, air, and water. Dooley County Sheriff Van Peevee says, quote, We've been down every field road, down every dirt road. We've walked back into the woods off each road as far as we thought anyone could carry her. We've never seen anything like this. End quote.
Investigators next move is to bring in cadaver dogs to see if they're able to find any sign of the little girl. Another detective on the case, Detective Lamberth says, quote, We feel someone picked her up. We think somebody might have seen something. Nobody's spoken up at this time. I really believe that girl is out there alive somewhere. This is something you just can't drop. End quote.
Later that month, on October 29, what should have been a day filled with celebration for ShyShy's ninth birthday is another painful reminder that time is moving and each day is another day without their precious daughter and sister. After those first few weeks of investigation, leads begin to dry up in the case and investigators are pulled off until only a few remain. In September of 1999, so it's been one year since Shy’Kemmia‘s abduction.
Her mother, Veronica says, quote, I don't know what I'm going to do. I just feel like she's out there trying to call me, trying to make her way back. End quote. Most days, Veronica doesn't want to leave the house for fear that ShyShy will turn up and she won't be there to greet her. She says, quote, I don't want her to have to look for me. I want to be home when she comes back. End quote. Investigators also seem to be frustrated by what little progress has been made on the case.
Detective Lamberth says, quote, we haven't been able to get a hand on it from the beginning. It's been frustrating for everybody, mentally and even physically. End quote. The GBI are still involved in the case and one of their agents said, quote, I have worked 30 years in the protection of children, going on 16 years with the GBI. And this is one of the most frustrating cases I've worked. You lie awake at night and wonder, what else can I do? What have I missed? End quote.
Police and her family are holding on to the belief that she is still alive. Sheriff Peevee says, quote, nobody has come up with any information that she's dead or alive. And by now, usually for a criminal act, something would have probably surfaced. That's why it makes me feel like she's still alive. You might just call it a gut feeling. End quote. The family and investigators also believe that someone in the neighborhood saw more than what they've told police.
Someone has information about that night. Veronica also believes that it was someone who shy shy knew that abducted her. Quote, I feel somebody saw and somebody knows what happened to my daughter. And I feel whoever got her knows her because I don't think no stranger got my baby. She knew what to do when strangers came around. She learned from that McGruff the crime dog in school, she isn't going to ride with no stranger. End quote.
Police also mentioned that they do have a suspect in the case that lives in the area. But at this point, they do not have enough evidence to bring a case against him. Detective Lamberth says, quote, just nothing has panned out enough that we can put the nail in the coffin. It is somebody from the area and it would be a neighbor. End quote. In September of 2001, so it's been three years since Shy’Kemmia vanished. Police arrest a man in the neighborhood on multiple rape charges.
Investigators decide to excavate an abandoned well on his property in relation to Shy’Kemmia‘s case. Police dig for hours but didn't find anything except trash, pine needles and mud. Police say that they don't have any direct link between this ban and Shy’Kemmia's abduction, but investigators want to be thorough. In 2007, so it's been nine years since Shy’Kemmia was abducted. And her mother starts each day with a prayer of gratitude.
Quote, I think the Lord every morning that we haven't got a phone call telling us that she's been found dead. I feel in my heart that she's still alive. End quote. Investigators reveal that they have gotten very few tips over the years and Shy’Kemmia's case. An anonymous caller in Las Vegas called to tell police that a man had moved into a nearby apartment with a girl that looked like shy shy. Please look into this and it fizzles out.
A few years later, a farmer called police saying that he found a suspicious mound at the edge of one of his fields and he thought it could be a grave, that it could be shy shy. When police started to dig, all they found was hard red clay. That was the last tip that police had gotten at this point.
In 2023, so it's been 25 years since shy shy's abduction and the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children release a new age progress photo of Shy’Kemmia and what she would have looked like in her mid thirties. In 2024, Veronica sits down with local and national news outlets to talk about shy shy and try to bring more awareness to her daughter's case. She still believes firmly that shy shy is still alive.
She says, quote, even if she's fine and she don't want to come back here, I just want that stamp saying she's located and I never gave up looking for her. And no matter how long it takes, I'm not going to stop searching for my daughter. End quote. Detective Lamberth is still working any tip that comes into this case. He's worked it since the beginning. He says, quote, I kindly feel it may be one person who was involved in this. End quote.
One thing investigators feel sure of is that if is still alive, she would have needed to seek medical attention at some point and would have likely needed to seek it well into adulthood due to her medical conditions. But that is all we know about the disappearance of Shy’Kemmia Pate. So if you know anything about the abduction of Shy’Kemmia Pate or shy shy's whereabouts today, please call the Dooley County Sheriff at 229-645-0920. So that is the case of Shy’Kemmia Pate.
Something about her nickname being shy shy and knowing that she wasn't, I don't know, was I thought that was just very sweet. When you described like her community, I immediately could like hear her nickname being echoed in that space. My heart is really broken for her family and in particular her mother. She loves her so fiercely and to know that right now she could be our age, it's just I would want people to be looking for me if I was still out there.
So I'm very happy to know that she has loved ones, especially her mother, just dedicated to never stopping looking for her. Yeah, her family have been fierce advocates for her and for keeping her name out there and her case active. Her sister was giving interviews just a few years ago about what happened that night and that's actually where I was able to piece together a lot of information.
There were some details really missing in the initial reports about what really happened when Shy’Kemmia went missing, like what exactly was the breakdown of events, but that interview that her sister gave was able to like paint a clear picture of those kind of last moments of her going to get the gas and then coming back and Shy’Kemmia being gone and her thinking, well, she'll probably be at the game and then she's not and the mom thinks she's at the game.
Like it's so heartbreaking that the miscommunication created that delay in getting reported, but her family from the moment they realized what was happening have been looking for her.
Yeah, to kind of get into it here, the timeline wise, that was something that I immediately wrote down, not just to advocate for her sister and put my mindset and what hers must be like and the guilt she must feel and to just, you know, if she does happen to listen to remind her that it is not her fault, but to comment on that moment, I immediately understood it's something like that. Not necessarily a child going missing or being abducted by waiting and older sibling going for gas.
That was would have been very, very normal in my neighborhood at that time as well, especially I'm from a very big family, lots of shuffling around, a lot of kids, busy kids down to the miscommunication around the football game and who went with where I just really feel for that moment in time because it would have been totally normal for her to wait a few minutes on the porch of her own home while her sister runs to go get gas. Children get to be safe, period. Children should be safe, period.
Yeah, I think it's one of those things that it's hard to imagine in this day and age of like cell phones and kids with cell phones or Apple watches or, you know, parents with cell phones, all of that. Like it's hard to imagine the freedom, but I kind of remember the summer of 1998 and it being like one of the freest summers of my life.
Like I would write a note to my mom saying like I was going for a bike ride in the morning and then I would just be gone until lunch, you know, like there were rules about where I should go and shouldn't go in the neighborhood, but you know, my parents couldn't pinpoint me exactly. They'd have to kind of come look for me if they needed me.
So it's so normal for that time and it's just good to remind people because it does seem so strange even just 20-ish years later to think about being that way, but that's really how it was. To circle back to shy kemia, yes, her body was in so many ways facing multiple uphill climbs, but those battles are also markers of how strong she was.
And even, you know, after she was hospitalized with her asthma attack and bounced back, what I just want to admire her strength in that like little body that was like doing everything it could to thrive and it seemed like she was part of a community and a family that was also encouraging her to thrive even in the midst of facing these battles that are so heartbreaking to hear about, but like that she didn't let them stop her.
Yeah, her health issues that she had as a child that, you know, doctors and investigators believe would have continued on into adulthood. It actually brings up a question for me that I couldn't quite find an answer to, but investigators feel strongly that shy shy would have needed to see doctors, you know, well into adulthood.
So that made me wonder if like a nurse or a doctor is treating a patient under a name like you know Jane Doe, but it's really Shy’Kemmia Pate, are they able to go to police to say like, hey, I think this matches based off of X, Y, and Z ailments or is that like a HIPAA violation because they don't know any better that it's not them. So that's something that I was trying to kind of dig into.
I don't work in the medical field at all, never have, so I don't quite know the ins and outs of HIPAA laws. Maybe if one of our listeners does know, feel free to send us an email, we do check them. So if one of you does maybe know the answer to that question, I know I would love to know.
Yeah, it's just something that struck me because I was like, well, these are pretty specific ailments and you know, a scar across her abdomen, like these are things that if she has been able to see a doctor that you know, a doctor might recognize, but if she's going in under a different name, then would they be able to report that to police under that suspicion?
I don't know, maybe they are and you know, investigators keep it private, but I also don't know if they are able to do that because of the United States privacy laws around, you know, your healthcare and your privacy in doctor settings. So yeah, if you know, if that's something that you're familiar with, I would love to know the answer. I couldn't really find it in my research. It's such a kind of nuanced question.
I wanted to touch base just on the very major hiccup in the beginning of it needing to be 24 hours. I start, I became my, my body energy like just became frantic when you said it because I knew that that wasn't supposed to be true. Yeah, so there is no waiting period at all. So if you ever, heaven forbid, need to report a child as missing, if someone pushes back and says you need to wait, you push right back and say, no, I do not because there's no waiting period for children.
And there is no waiting period for reporting adults either, but how serious the police will take that right away can vary from department to department as we've seen in so many of these cases. But the family definitely pushed back pretty quickly and got her reported before the 24 hours, but it is really frustrating that that was happening.
Yeah, the fact that they had to push back in the middle of looking for their loved one, their child, what I wrote down was bananas because I knew, you know, there was something going off in me that knew the rule, knew the law. Again, I feel like it's just a, such a testament to who the family is that they pushed back immediately and were firm and their no and said, look for her. And they did.
It was, it's sad and unfair and wrong that they had to, but their love is so unconditional and forever committed to shykemia that they got it done. This is something else just commenting on again, just the mother daughter relationship there. She knew her daughter, she knew her so well to the point where, you know, she talked about what she learned in school about stranger danger.
She knew her own daughter and knew that she wouldn't get into a car of someone that she didn't know, which also brings me to the question of, well, if it was someone that she did know, who the hell was it or is it? And it's also terrifying to think that that person is still out there or that people know and aren't coming forward with any information. Yeah. The investigation does seem to have somebody in mind or a suspect at least that's kind of been mentioned again and again over the years.
Now I don't know if the suspect that police had in mind for years is the same person who was later convicted of rape and they dug the well up in the yard. I'm not sure if that is the same person. It didn't seem like it based off of some of the comments that investigators made that they just wanted to be very thorough because of where he lived to shy shy. But I do wonder who that suspect is in the neighborhood.
And yeah, it just, I really agree with shy shy's family that it feels like somebody must have seen something that night because it was a beautiful Friday evening. People were out. She was wearing a neon green Jersey. Like there were so many things that would make you think she would be seen. So I hope that somebody does come forward with what they know. I hope for the future of this case, just like with all the cases we cover that the families get answers.
I would love to see shy shy come home and be reunited with her family. Her mom is still living in the same place just because she wants to be there when shy shy comes home. And I really hope they get that reunion and the answers that they're looking for. Again, if you know anything about the abduction of Shy’Kemmia Pate or shy shy's whereabouts today, please call the Dooley County Sheriff at 229-645-0920. We'll have pictures of shy shy on our Instagram at cold and missing.
And we'll also have the recently created age progress photo that was just from 2023, I believe. So definitely check it out there. Please share it. Share the podcast. Get, let's get shy shy's name out there and her picture out there. So if somebody recognizes her, we can get those answers. We also would really appreciate it if you're not driving.
If you could take a minute to review us, you can go to our website, www.coldandmissing.com or if you're an Apple podcast, leaving us a written review is really helpful in getting this case and this podcast into people's feed. So thank you if you've already done it. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. If you've already done it. But if you haven't, today's a today's a new day and you can you can do it today. On our website, we have transcripts. We have our back catalog.
If you're searching for a specific case to see if we've covered it, you can search there really easily or if you just want to look your state up and see the cases we've covered, that's also doable on our website and you can review us there too. So lots of chances to review us today. It's a good day for a review. So that is all I have. Thank you so much for listening to Cold and Missing. I hope you're having a safe summer. I'm your host, Ali. And I'm your cohost, Eli.
Have a good week and stay safe, y'all. Stay safe, y'all.