Coretta or Whateva

Who what's up, beautiful people. It is your baby mama, favorite baby Mama, Stormy Pe and this is another episode of Chocolate Chip and Zip the modern day female perspective. Duramn song, back at it again, boom and back at it again. We just go and get it right out the way, get it done real fast while still remember. Okay, Philly, if the only thing you are getting for Valentine's Day is a snap from team Snapchat, or if you're sick of doing the same thing with your partner, dinner,

date, movie, whatever, don't even worry about that. I got you covered. February seventeenth at World Cafe Live, come to Chocolate Chip and Sip live taping with me, Stormy p. We got games, we got prizes. It's a whole bunch of fun. Okay. Whether you're a side chick or a main chick, single or in a relationship, this is the only place you need to be. Click the link of my bio and get your tickets right now, or go to stormyp dot com. I can't wait

to see you guys there. Yea all right? Boom and I did that one straight the last week, last few weeks, I've been fucking up but I did that one straight through. So go me, go, me, go me. Happy New Year, everybody. It's so good to be here amongst the Saints of nineties R and B love. Okay, I hope you all are enjoying your new year. I hope you all are. Seven. Please stop licking your nuts. Can y'all hear that because I feel like I feel like my man got a mic and like his tongue and nuts are on

the mic. But yeah, so I hope you all seven, please baby, just set them say never mind, never mind. If y'all just hear the nut licking, just ignore it from now. Okay. I hope you are standing on business, and if you aren't, I hope this episode helps you get there. Okay, I don't know about you, but my twenty

twenty four so far has been amazing. All right. Not only has Cat Williams enforced by standing on business, but also I just learned that, you know, I'm gonna change my name to Corretta or whatever because apparently apparently that's what y'all want, right, Like that's oh no, that's just Jonathan Major. It's just him. He say you want that? Okay, cool, whatever, But no, twenty seve four has been cool for me. I did my first show on the road with Tonight's Conversations and it was really cool.

Thank you to everybody who I met in the Ohio. Y'all were really, really nice. This has been a new journey for me, but I'm really excited about it. And with that being said, I've decided twenty twenty four it's a new year, but the same me. Okay, I'm on my same bullshit, all right. And with that, I do want to say one of the things that I really want to carry over from twenty twenty three is my continued growth, because I felt like twenty twenty three told me

a lot of lessons that I wasn't really paying to to. I know, the term standing on business was real popular in twenty twenty three, but me personally, I feel like I really started standing on business in twenty twenty three. Like all before a bitious tip toeing shit, I was tiptoeing, respectfully. I know, I will stand up here and say I was not staying in on a business abituous tip tip toeing, okay, tip toeing, and

my Jordan's that was me, Okay. So I feel like by the time we got to the end, I really feel like I learned to stay on business. So this episode, I want to talk to you guys about growth, okay, the importance of growth and how it changes you and and the process the things you learned in between okay, And one of the things I want to say, I learned growth okay. And on my journey of growth, I learned that there are certain things that you do and don't do on

the first date. Okay. Like for me, I'm not one of those people who I'll give you my number on day one and then we'll go on a date on date two, like we have to talk, check FaceTime, text, like I gotta decide, like do I really want you in my presence? And if I do. I realized there are things that I know I can and I cannot do on the first date. For example, on a first date, I'm not gonna order a beer. And I love beer. I love beer. I love beer. But on the first date,

I am not gonna order a beer. You ain't gonna be in your group chet calling me Hank kill. No, No, I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna do it. Okay. Not only that I didn't know that men took women who drink beer so masculinely, Like I didn't know it was such a thing. Like one of the things I learned in twenty twenty three is that men women who drink beer is masculine. I mean, as if there are fifty million other reasons why one would think I was his masculine

but a little bit of Roseanne. Huh. I'd rather be Hanghilled than Roseanne. No. No, I'd rather be the master of propane than Roseanne. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Okay, I think that I really didn't know. I didn't know that like beer were sot taboo, and I think it mostly comes from in my family, Like we really drink the same two things over and over again, Like it's it's beer and it's gin. So either way, when we ordered dreams, she were gonna think I

was masculine or a pirate. Yeah, Like I'm like, okay, cool. I mean it's a safe space. Like you know, when I come to show up for the first daid, I'm not gonna have like you know, my peg leg and my parrot on my shoulder. I'm gonna be reasonable, be reasonable, Okay. But yeah, I just learned that men don't like that. That's it and it's all. But I think we all need to pay attention to who we're showing up ass or are we putting our best

foot forward on first dates? And I think it's a difference between putting It's a difference between putting your best foot forward and showing up as a representative, because I think putting your best foot forward is like, Yo, we haven't had a chance to vibe and talking get to know each other, so you don't know that like I'm really a speak girl who chugs beer. Yeah right, Like that might not be something that everybody can handle on date one.

That might be like a date three or four thing for some people, you know. So yeah, I just realized there are certain things you do and don't do on the first date. Let me go to the live, real fast. Dartman seventeen said, I have my anniversary party at a brewery. It was a good time. Lorda Carlehone said, not the peg leg and the pirate your favorite holiday says pirate drink rum Oh, they do drink from. They do drink from. It's still a manly drink though, drink they

want. Shan said, pirates can drink whatever they want. Think it's identified pots nowadays. What Loda Carle said, No, women who drink beer are cool. I don't think that unless she's actually masculine. Dartmann seventeen says, you look like a burper. Maybe I am a burper and I don't need the beer to be a burper, Like that's just it, and that's all I got. I have a good heart, though, does that get yes? Okay? Good? So we're talking a little bit about growth and the

things that I've learned from twenty twenty three to now. Things I don't want to carry over, things that I might want to stay in twenty twenty three. And growth comes in many ways, and I feel like sometimes it really just kicks you in the back of the head, right, Like sometimes you really are thick in the midst of something and you realize, damn the fuck am I doing? Right? So one of my biggest moments of growth from twenty twenty three is I realized I was really harassing the nigga that I didn't

want to be with. I didn't know what to be with this thing. I really had to stop and say, bitch, what are we doing? And before y'all start trying to come for me. I want you to realize a lot of y'all are doing the exact same thing. You're being annoying as fuck, controlling as fuck in the way for someone you have no intentions on being with. You don't even really like this person. And whether it be out of boredom, whether it be out of loneliness, whether it be out

of you know, ill intentions, it doesn't matter. Like at some point we have to sit back and realize I'm wasting this person time. And not only am I wasting this person time, I'm being annoying as fuck while I do it. And that's like one of the moments of growth for me. Like I think it really came out of when I talk about, like, you know, dating out of desperation. I realized I really was just wasting

people time because I didn't want to be by myself. That's crazy, Like do you understand the growth that it takes to acknowledge that, Like, yo, I know I don't want to be with you, but I'm also not doing anything. So what's tip And I'm not saying any of this it's okay. I'm not saying any of this is okay. What I'm saying is this is what I learned, and I think once we be real with ourselves,

this is how we cleanse the dating pool, ladies and gentlemen. We take this accountability, We reach these fucking revelations, and we move forward purpose like talk how much shit you want? Nine times out of ten you all are on somebody's roster and you are not who they want, or you have someone on your roster and they're nothing like what you're looking for. Like, we really have to take accountability and be like, yo, sometimes we be out

here wasting people time. Okay, all right, Cat Williams, I'm just saying, y'ain't never did that before. I'm just saying. A breezy two three five seven said firefire a party, Barbie. Now, how the fuck did he get back in here? I don't know. Oh not that firefighter, A different one though, Yo. Why I was at the gym the other day, y'all Remember that guy who fucking we went on a first date riding bikes and then his car didn't go reversed and I had to help him

push his car. You remember shot Uh, he is a firefighter, and he showed up to the gym. I was at because like the building alarm is going off, and I was like, oh my god, hey, how are you? So we had like short conversations and then he immediately texted me like, hey, who are you dating? Right now? I'm going to committed relationship with my Lord Save Jesus Christ, Like I just please, Like I'm not gonna keep going back and forth with you like this, This

is enough, This is enough. Loaded Carleon says, I don't break carts, amend them. That sounds like something a fuck boy would say. Okay, right, gift the keys. What's up, baby? What's up? Loaded Carlyon says, I don't want a roster, and Shrifted Villain says, is that how you ended up with? I'm not talking about firefightbody. Yeah,

So I think we all need to let's do a quick exercise. Right when you sit and you think about the people you are giving your time and your attention to, whether it be texting, whether it be your body, whether it be your time, whether it be FaceTime calling, whatever, Right, honestly, act yourself. Is this someone I want to be with? Think about it? Because I guarantee you got at least one person on your roster who they don't fit the mold. He's just bored. That's it.

That's it. In't us all, that's it. You bored, you lonely. You're getting a little moist down there. Men and women too, Okay. So I just think it's like, come on, let's go, come on, let's go. I'm just saying, it's a real thing. There's no way if you have like people, you're entertaining. Everyone's going somebody don't fit, like somebody gotta be the mascot. You know. No, I'm just yelling nobody has to be the mascot. But I'm just saying, somebody

on there doesn't fit. Okay. So when we talk about growth, right, I think that we have to continuously dig into the revelations that we may have come to last year, and for me myself especially few so I wanted to take a second and just peel back the curtain. Okay. So I know fellas have this weird obsession with trying to figure out things and the female

mind and how it works. Right, One of the things fellas always want to try to understand is how come when a group of women go out the country or go to Miami on a trip, they always come back not friends. They always okay, somebody might've got hands put on okay, somebody might have got blocked, somebody exited the group chat. Like, how come whenever women go to Miami or go on a trip, they always come back not friends. Let's peel back the curtain, okay. The reason why women go

on trips together and come back not friends. It always boils down to two reasons. Two reasons. One somebody was broke. Okay, somebody was broke, and two somebody was a whore. That's it, that's it. These are the only two reasons. I don't care how many women you pull, it's always going to be somebody was broke and somebody was a whore. Okay. And I know some of you are going to put put in a chat.

Some of you were gonna say, oh, well, such and such was jealous of me, and she just didn't no, No, such and such was broke okay, And instead of her being comfortable enough to say, hey, I don't have enough money for that excursion, she actually got an attitude to shut down and act like everyone else was the problem. Bitch, I broke my money. Bitch I got my money. How is this on

me? You want to go or not, like, let me know, let me know, Like you was fine in the hotel room, living it up while we was your that alcohol that we brought back to the room. Then as soon as we talked about doing excursions, going out to the restaurants to eat or taking a side trip, Babe, now your stomach hurt. What's happening? What's happening? Okay, what is going on? And then on the flip side of that, you got the horse okay, and you

know what, it's not even always just the horse. Okay, you know who your friends are sometimes when going on the trip, right, but I want to say a majority of times, I will hope you would know who you're going on a trip with Kelly from Bible study and trying to throw the ass in the circle in the middle of the club. She don't like that, and you know she don't like that, Okay, So now she's feel

weird and now she feels like she gotta be standoffish. Or every time we turn around just because a man buys a drink, though, mean you gotta go off in the corner with him, or you gotta go to a secondary location with him. That ain't what we're doing. All right, now, I know that security wise, we always say we can't here together, we're gonna leave together, okay, but we're also all adults. However, bitch, you want to leave separately every time we go out, like God damn.

Like now your mama call on my phone. Now, your baby daddy calling my phone trying to figure out where you at. Now, how I get this? This ain't my fight to fight. So when we talk about why do women go on trips and come back not friends, once again, there's only one of two reasons. Somebody brow somebody who that's it. That's it. And then like I just want to dive into the dive into this, this hordem a little bit because uh, lovely Serena, oh says Kelly

from Bible Study, is a different person in my Tego Bay. Now you're throwing it in her face when y'all get back in the States. That's the other side of it. I wanted to I wanted to dig into. Okay. Now, some people truly believe once you get on that plane, everything is insane. Nothing else applies, all right, And once we get back to the States, back to the city, you can't bring up that whole shit I did in Miami. You can't. You can't. And there are

some women who say I can't. I can okay, because you ain't Finna, and is because you ain't Finna come back to Philly and be judging me because I choose to be a whole in Philly, but you chose to be a hole in Miami. No, no, no, we both hosts. Okay, don't trying to come up here and act all holier than thou. That's not what we're doing. That's not it. Because you you you you a sucking Salem dick at the bar. Remember movies in my Tago Bay.

Remember remember that was you. That wasn't me, Okay. I was just out here doing the limbo, mine of my business. You was out here doing the limbo, which pants off what we're doing, what we're doing. So yeah, yeah, that's it. That's it, in case you were ever wondering. And I hate it. I hate that it has to be that way. But you know what's crazy. I've only I've only I've only came back, not friends once. Where are you laughing? You have to

think about that because I got some good ass stats. I'm just saying. One of four friends is going to be a whore, bruh, Like if I was, if I was a husband, I'm gonna be mad, like damn, Like, so how many people going five? Damn? Somebody gonna be a whore? Potentially too. I know you ain't gonna be broke, but like, dang, that means you could be a whore. That's crazy. So who else going? Kelly Kelly with the big butt? Oh yeah,

she definitely for hell No. Yeah, I've only came back not friends once and it's actually because my homie was broke and I was like footing the bill for both of us, and we didn't articulate that to everyone else in the group, so they actually was beefing with my homie thinking like, oh, you ain't putting your shit up, But we never discussed like yo on my card is enough for both of us, because I felt like it was a nobody fucking business. If the whole bill is being paid, it's not

nobody fucking business, right. So yeah, long story short, like half of us left like halfway through the trip and me and my homie just stayed till like the end of it. Yeah, it was real bad, but and then like they ended up having like words at the dinner table, like we're at a five star restaurant and my wonder home and my one friend it's like, yo, you wanna put your guard down, And my homie is like, bitch, I'll socked the shit out y'all Like whatever we minju.

We are like at a nice restaurant, dressed up, like looking very presentable, and it just went left real fast. So I speak, I speak. I speak from a place of experience. When women come back now, friend, it's usually because somebody broke or somebody be in a hole, And it's hard because both of these things are easily rectifiable and they don't have to hinder the trip or hinder the relationship, Like if you're willing to stand on ten tools and be like, yo, I'm brewke, so I'm not really

trying to do a whole bunch of excursions. This is what I got paid for, y'all. Can you know? This is what I got enough money for. Y'all can go off and do whatever y'all want. I'll stay here in the room, vibe X, Y and Z. You can't be mad because niggas want to go out and still have fun because they brought their money and you didn't you knew that when you was ordering Uber eats all week?

Okay, relax, set your ass to the rumor relax. Okay. On the same token, if you want to be a little bit flirtatious, have a talk with your homies, like, yo, I'm trying to get the groove back. Okay. Let them know so they know how to move and they don't feel like they have to be overprotective of you when you get a little drunk. If you try and get a little ditch, just say that, like, you know, like, make it real, lovely. Serena says, make it not itinerary. Ask everyone's budget ahead of time. Yes,

okay. So I'm not sure if y'all like pay attention to my socials or whatever. But when I go out, like on trips and stuff, I go out with the group chat. You know, we always say made it out the group chat or pink posse whatever, right, And one of the things I will say is, this is the most fucking efficient group of women I have ever met in my life. Whenever we go somewhere like weeks out, they're like, Yo, this the itinerary, this we got planned

this, how much money you probably gonna need? And these motherfuckers don't miss don't miss it be between six and eight of us every time, never had an argument, never had nobody asking bitches what they're looking at, none of that. And I think it's really because we're very clear and concise in our conversations. This is what we need, this is what we're doing. If you want to do side things on your own, this is time allotted for

that. Like bro, just communication, communication, communication for our stuff like the world and a lack of it really just be making life so hard for people. That's it. I got you. I'm gonna add you to the group chair. I'm gonna ask you to if you want to get added to the group chat, let me know, let me know, fellas not you. You have to have a vagina. Okay, thank you? All right.

So I want to go back for a second. We were talking about growth and talking about things that we learned, revelations that we made, X, Y, and Z. Right. This is one I actually found out this year's recent conversation I was having with some man and fellows. I want you all to tap in and let me know, am Am I hitting it

or no, Am I missing the mark? Right. So I was having that conversation with this man, and he was telling me about how he's building this girl and uh, he loves her, but he had expressed to her that he didn't know if he wanted to be with just one person for the rest of his life. Right now, he's an adult, like at his big age adult. Right up until this point, he's never been in an

open or poly relationship. However, up until this point, he's never been able to touch the money that he's able to touch now, right, So I want to explain this one more time for you. There's a man who's in a relationship and told his partner he wasn't sure if he wanted to be with just one woman for the rest of his life, even though he's never been in a poly or open relationship, never swung, none of that, right, But he's also never touched the money that he's touching now. And

I want to say, a lot of y'all men aren't polly. You just have fomo fear of missing out. Yeah, yeah, a lot of y'all men really aren't polly. You just have fear of missing out. You just

have fomo fear and missing out Like that's real to me. Because he sat in my face and told me like yo, I just don't want to say, like I'm all into her and you know, I can give her everything, and then someone comes up that I never had access to before because I didn't have the funds or I wasn't in a position, and I don't want to hurt her, like a lot of y'all really think that, y'all be Polly, But you just are in a position where you're touching different money and

you have access to different women that you didn't have access to before, and you have fear and missing out. You think that if I'm in this relationship and something better comes along, I'm gonna miss it, when if you was actually in the relationship, you wouldn't be paying attention to anything other than the relationship. Like that doesn't make any sense. So if you love her and

this is what you want to do, HOI, then love her. But like it's you how to do facts or feelings like the fomo thing that's a feeling. Yeah, there might be something going on, but you actually have a solid way at home. If you can say that, then are you actually in this relationship or you just with this girl? Like I said, I don't understand like if you're in a relationship, you usually have tunnel vision. You ain't paying attention to all those shit. Now, I just want

to say this doesn't apply to everybody. This just applies to a certain select group of men. Like a lot of you really aren't Polly because at the end of the day, once you have access or are intimate with these women that you didn't have access to before, nine times out of ten, you're gonna go back to your girl because you love her. You just have fomo,

you have fear missing out. You just want something. Do you feel like it's like, you know, and like a Thanksgiving You don't really be hungry, you don't need a third plate, but you're gonna throw some gams on there just a case, you know, I throw a little mac and cheese take away or two just because just because it's here, just because it's

here. I really feel like that's how some of you think that you are Polly, especially when we go into relationships with When you talk about being it's never about building generational wealth and working together as a community and raising multiple families and building income. No, sometimes when y'all talk to me about being Polly,

it's just about fucking different visions. And then it's always like we haven't successfully We're not successful in one relationship, we haven't stilled it doing one relationship. We're thinking about five like it never competed to me either. But I mean, I understand, but I don't. And I hate the fact that this one percentage is so loud that it gives the poly community a negative narrative.

I really do, because there are people out there who are really trying to build and stayd tintos down and be on some serious stuff, you know what I mean. But unfortunately this one group is so loud that it just overshadows all that, and it be like the wrong people saying the right things. They just be saying all the budshit they learned, the therapy that recession they got. They just be out here getting mad cloud over the dumb shit

and be saying it be the wrong people saying the right things. Hello, out you need to stop sitting in our cars and talk to ruin it ruin it, ruin it, ruin it, ruin it, ruin it. Right, So Jerry's bell says, thank you, But why hold on? You know, I'm trying to scroll up. Give me a second stripes and villain says, tell Brah, when you leave with cheese, you get rats yo bars bars. Jerry's Bell says not all men are equal. Dwalda Rosa Star

says he ain't never got bitches before money. Uh, if you ain't getting them now, you ain't never gonna get them. But you know what's crazy, Like you don't need money to get girls, bro, So I think that you don't need money to get girls. But in today's society where the tech men are the men who are really making the money, those are the

ones who are having access to women that they didn't have access before. And once again we talk about just being the loudest, these are also the men that are on the internet talking about your passport road the girls here are trash. Not realizing the girls you are attracting the trash because you never really had money before, so you don't know how to move an these scenarios and you don't have the emotional intelligence or the wherewfall to see that woman's a gold digger,

she don't really like you. Everybody that's on that kick it's on some type of energy. Shit. Yes, then yes, when they be talking like if you're on the energy. John, Then I'm I assume that you believe that you are what you attract. So if you're attracting trash, and this goes for both ways, if you're attracting trash, there's something wrong with you. Yes, you gotta look within. Yes once again, not all, Yeah, not everybody, but not even Yes we're a cover. Yeah

yeah, yeah, once again, once again, not all. But I just want to say the loudest. We're talking about the loudest. All right, that's it, that's it. Ruxy Stampede says, So you do need money to get girls, because these are the guys that are really getting the

money, laughing my ass off. No, no, you don't need money to get girls, but the guys who never Okay, you don't need money to get girls, But the guys who never got girls don't know how to weed out the gold diggers or women who just want them for the money.

So it causes them to have negative experiences in abundance and pour that back out into the Internet and all these other spaces where people talk about relationships, and that's how we get these played out ass conversations, you know what I mean.

So, yeah, the birth of a feather flock together. So if you're going around the same type of chicks all the time, of course your your mindset is going to be the chicks that you have access to now that you feel like it's an award reward because of whatever it is that you do. Yeah, now you're just going to have that tainted. Just like when women deal with fuck boys all the time, they have like all nigga. It's the same thing for guys. Is that we don't be talking about it

until we get on the podcast. Corey says, I'm a tech dude. I feel attacked. I said, not all, but I'm talking about, you know, the shiat fit. I was laughing at Buddy's previous statement. Rexts Stampede says, yeah, man, you know, I don't want to drag this, but I just want to say the conversation stemmed from us talking about how some men aren't Polly. They just have fomo fear of missing out. You are touching a certain level of money that you never had access to

before. So you have access to a certain type of bitch that you never had access to before. But unfortunately, because you never had access to it, you don't know how to read out the gold diggers, and I hate that for you, but you can't let those negative experiences fuel how you interact

with women moving forward. And I feel like if you're in a situation where your main reason for being polly is that you don't want to potentially hurt your partner because you may be coming into contact with that you didn't have a chance with before, I think the problem is you. I think you need to go talk to the lady. Pro tip like, if your girl can trust

you, you have absolutely no idea what you have actually access to. So your girl might be actually down with having another girl she knew that you weren't gonna go nowhere. Never mind. Oh I'm not even gonna read that you is wilding my boy. One yeah. Four says if I never had a T bone, I might want to try it out, just saying okay, but gras Saint Greener, if you never had a T bone because you couldn't afford a T bone, that's different than I've never had a T bone just

because I didn't really want to try a T bone. That's different, right, because if it's something where, for example, there are some people who literally only were designer because now they make enough money to buy designer. When they was working at minimum Way's job, they had no desire to buy a fucking Chanel bag, bottom shoes, none of that. But now because they have certain access to certain money, and it's nothing wrong with that. It's

nothing wrong with that. If you feel like you want to dress in your tax bracket, that's cool. But to get up to that level and then ship on people who can't afford it or feel like not wearing it is beneath you. Come on, that's not being out of nowhere? Like, bro, was it you the same niggas walking around with them light up shoes from pay less? Okay, So now while you acting like you're above like, make it makes sense to me, Make it make sense to me. You

just adults. Being adults is hard, especially when a majority of the adult community don't act like adults. Like God, damn boy, come on, come on, just like you gotta stop with this, like like it's not settling if you found somebody that completes you, bro, like you just go both ways like we gotta chill out, like and then you know what else really struck me? He never said, like, Yo, I'm gonna find someod that I didn't have access to, and maybe that will be my person.

It was just I'm gonna find somebody that I didn't have access to and have sex with, and I don't want to make my girl say bruh, bruh, bruh. Come on on five six four four says wellhy pay more when you could pay less? All right? All right, I'm doring sick y'all done? Okay, all right, guys, So now we're going to get into the edible portion of the show. So the edible portion is when we read questions, comments, concerns that you guys and in and on the

day that we record, I usually put a prompt up in stories. If what you have to say is too long or it's not on one of the days I put up the prompts. Don't even worry about that. You can always email me at inquiries at stormypea dot com. So, first question, do women find it sexy when you take the initiative on Valentine's Day and ask her and don't ask her about anything? Yeah, because you know why. I hate to be that guy and bring up a twenty twenty three conversation.

But this is one of the times that women really wants you to lead. And when I say women, I'm gonna take the bank who's ever more dominant in the relationship because might be guy on guy, girl on girl. You know, whatever you do, who's ever more dominant? We really want you all to lead, Like, yeah, tell me what's time to be there? Uh? What's the dress attire? And should I take the special shower first? Because like, let me know what are we doing when it comes

to Valentine's Day? Don't ask me nothing, Okay, tell me what time where I gotta be? What's the dress attire? Yeah? What's the dress attire? And if I have to take the special shower? Because maybe I don't want to do nothing. I don't want to know nothing. I just want to show up. That's it. That's it. And you know what, the less I have to think on days like Valentine's Day, the better

the better because that gives me more time to special shower. Okay. And if you don't know what the special shower is, maybe she waiting for y'all wedding day. I don't know, I don't know what you'll want to say. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. I don't know. Right shot. You doing something with Valentime's Day. I couldn't hear you. Yeah, well, you know, if you guys needed something to do February seventeenth, what nigga, I ain't doing shit for Valdenhome's Day either.

Oh my god. If you need something to do for Valentine's Day, it's not on the actual day, but it's still something to do. February seventeen, Our world haf a live. We got the live tape in and chocolate chip and sip with me Stormy pet and I'm bring in some of my friends and we're gonna talk about all the toxic uh not toxic, the healthy spend on these toxic conversations that needs to be had. Okay, once again, click the link of my bio we get your tickets or go to stormype

dot com. Do it now, Do it now, Do it now. And yeah, it's gonna be a good time, whether you're a side chick or a mainoin, whether we have somebody shit you. If you don't, you might leave with somebody. Okay, So yeah, come on out, get your tickets. It's gonna be a vibe. Next question, and this one really grabbed my intention. Okay, so so much so that I had to ask you guys what your answer was. Okay, So it says, how do you put someone back in the friend zone after we had sex?

It was only one time? And now my straight friend is trying to cuff me? Who who? Now, for a little context, this question is from a homosexual female and she says, how do you put someone back in the friend zone after we had sex? It was only one time? Now my straight friend is trying to cuff me? Who? Wow? So uh, y'all know me. I had to go to Algore's Internet and see what you guys had to say. And I'm not gonna lie. Some of y'all get on my nerves because y'all play too much. Okay, y'all play too

much. So one person answered, the organization is going through a rebuking phase. Emails, Oh alt soon, Why y'all like this? Why y'all like this? Why would y'all send this woman an HR email like this? The organization is going through a rebuking phase. Emails go out soon. Bitch, don't disrespect me, don't disrespect me. Don't disrespect me. Right. Next person says, you should have whispered boo in their ear. What what what is wrong with y'all? You should have whispered boo in her ear? Oh

my god? How who raised you? People? Who raised you? People? The next person says, start bringing the next person you smashing around and brag how amazing the sex is. Oh, so you don't want to be friends no more? Okay, because doing shit like that, we ain't gonna be friends no more. That that's because what now you don't care about me and my little feelings? Oh hell no, hell no. Then last one says, tell them that going back platonic is the best way to remain in

each other's lives. Not gonna lie. It was only like four answers like this okay. Out of the hundreds of replies that I received, only four were on this tip. Grow up, okay, grow up all right? And I just want to say, baby, just tell them, tell me, tell them, like, just please, like, don't ever have me out here look stupid. I don't never want to be out here looking stupid over exerting myself. Bruh. I don't never want to be out here looking

stupid over exerting myself. Baby, tell me, tell me, like listen, huh huh. And I feel like uncomfortable conversations. Is another reason why the dating pool has so much fecal matter in it. Okay, because you got people moving one day now mentioned how it looks for her perspective. Y'all been friends, now y'all lovers, But you're already skipped nineteen steps of building a foundation because y'all been friends. So to her, maybe it's going to

pop it. And before we get into the scenarios of you know, sexuality and street and gay blah blah blah blah, let's just talk about feelings. She already had feelings for you as a friend for y'all to take it to the next step. On some level, she skipped building those foundational blocks that are required for the beginning stages of dating, so she might be more inclined to a little bit more for you. So how do we How do we go back into the friend zone? Is it even is it even possible?

Did we open Pandora's box? Can we go back? Tell me again and will be lovers? And baby? No like all some real stuff. Just tell her, Hey, I love you and I appreciate you and I enjoyed my time with you the other day. I think that moving forward. I would feel most comfortable in that being in a platonic space up in the bathroom, not up in the bathtop, rubber dubb it. Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, tell her, tell her,

tell her. The best thing to do is to tell her, because if the shoe was on the other foot, you will want somebody to tell you that's it. And I want to say, you have to set and stand on your boundaries so you cannot be sexual with this person. Ain't no funny memes, Ain't no sexual well, ain't no sexual memes, Ain't no in the windows, Ain't no like weird touchy philly jokes, none of that. We're just platonic and you have to move platonically like. That's it.

And that's all ambitiously said. Nah, just block her. Unk five six four four says realer words were never spoken. Sir James mcgiver says, what's up, stormy? Yeah, thank you? Hey, Hey. ThEC says friends can't go on in the backyard and fight, let alone. Revert back to origins email, I'm hollering, thank you. Jay birdo on five six four four says, am I crazy? But how about that person? Just tells the person straight up the truth, just saying I agree, I agree

with one thousand percent, as wild as that is. Who would have thought? Garant Keith Harris says it was one and done, big dog. Thanks, though you cannot tell them man, that is not okay. It's never okay, that's not what we want to do. Uh uh. Stripe de Villa said, did she like it? She didn't answer, so I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. On five six four four says one time, it's fine with me. Drake voice, y'all are hell, y'all are hell hell? Okay, Yeah, So long story short,

My answer is just to just tell her okay. Next question, who At what point is it okay to start spoiling a woman? I feel like I do it too soon and it just ends up with them gold digging. I know, I know, go ahead and get your answers out now, go ahead, because I already know. I already know. I'm gonna read it again. At what point is it okay to start spoiling a woman? I feel like I do it too soon and it just ends up with them gold digging? Okay, friend, right, respectfully, there is no set of

rules on when you can start spoiling a woman. It all depends on vibes. And if you feel like you're doing it too soon and it ends up with them gold digging, maybe you are in danger. Okay, these women are praying on you, okay, bruh. If you feel like my man needs an adult, okay, it's not okay baby. If you feel like a majority of the women you start spoiling turn out to be gold diggers, you're majority spoiling the wrong women. Okay, Bruh, bruh, Come on,

come on, strife. De Billain says, when you leave with cheese, you get rats. Honestly, Honestly, I am hollering. Jerrus Bell says, well when you really fuck with her. Marby Lyon said taking notes up to un five six four four says, show up with the pacer like Cold did and Martin. If she you stay, she might be a keeper. I'm hollering. Big Dave Chief two O five says, I feel like you just do it in your own time guarant Keith Harris says a woman is

an investment. Sometimes you get a return on investment, sometimes you don't, but you have to learn how to read the room. Agreed. Pretty Boy Day says, you can't use that azure come online because you see what you get. Help me it did die, because you'll get women that's only invested in your money. Ambitiously says you ain't caughter. You bored her. I am hollering, hold on, y'all. The the thing the tripod died, so now I have to hold it. Come on, boss, it's so

annoying. He's fucking annoying. Dark Man seventeen says, shy, it ain't no slave, y'all. Who sign y'all don't be on shod side. Clever Corey says that there's the gun line. Boss. I don't like this. I don't like where we're going with this, Okay, so let's go back right. So the guy was saying, like, you know, at what point it's okay to start spoiling a woman because he feels like he does it

too soon and it just ends up with them golden. Okay, I don't care how pretty this woman is. I don't care how banging her body is. Okay, you have to sit back, remove yourself from the situation and asks is she there for you or is she there for the food, for the cars, for the house, for the money, for the trips. Pay attention, my brother, okay, because the signs is always there,

Bruh. The signs is always there. And it's a difference between knowing your worth, setting your standards, and feeling like certain things you don't want to partake in and realizing, like, yo, you're actually just not interested in getting to know this man. You're actually not interested in having a good time with this man. At some point you have decided that it has to be transactional, when in all actuality you expect him to blow money on you.

And what does he get in return? What's the ROI? What's the ROI? No, seriously, what's the ROI? Like? When dating? I want to stop the narrative of men don't get an ROI. I don't like that. I don't like that at all. It doesn't sit well with me. Place cool name here says what would Coretta want? Come on? What would Coretta do? Come on? Now? Huh? Now? In the same sentence, Coretta would be with a man who would like you know what? This goes back to, And I hate to say it. I hate

to say it. Right, like, if a woman fucks with you, she settles for less and when I say settles for less, I mean and the effort that you put out, I mean the money that you spend, I mean everything. Right, So it's like, Yo, they asking me to do X, Y and z, but to the guy who may be more attractive, taller, whatever, they don't even gott to do half as much. And it's like, no, stand on your shit. If you got something to offer, make sure she know it. Like, baby,

you gotta enjoy me. You can't just say you joy my money. That's not it. That's not it. And they come in many ways. Yeah yeah. And the crazy part is it ain't even just the bad bitches acting like this. It be all of them. It be the less stands too. It's always the have nots, but sometimes be the less than and have nots don't less. You get a brokeie with a body, Oh my god, oh my god, a brookie with a body. Baby, she don't even got a ha face. She know, she know? Oh aw hate

that for you. So yeah, how do you know? Make sure? How do you know? I'm gonna say, there's never a good time to start spoiling a woman. Whatever you choose to do, it should be on a timeline based on vibes. Okay, how is she making you feel? Okay, if somebody else was telling you about the way she was treating you, would you call them stupid? If so, I don't think you should start spoiling her yet, Okay, Like, is she investing in you the

same way you're about to financially invest in her? Come on, come on with her time, with her energy, with her space, not just her body, like, what's up? Guarant Heath Harris says the brokies with a body hand is always out. Ambitiously says the gooney looking girls be the ones asking the most pretty boy day says y'all gave him the power, told you back to the old times, keep them barefoot and pregnant. The world was a happier place, Sir, I need you to leave. Just go ahead

and get your ass please, thank you? On five six four four says is there a thing is moving too fast? I think there is a Yeah. I think there is a thing as moving too fast for men and women, right, Yeah, for women. I think that sometimes we give our body too fast for men. I think sometimes y'all spend y'all money too fast, like yeah, dang wow. Three hundred dollars first date for real, for real, and in the same talking to be like, yo, sis, she gave up the butt on the first date for real, for real.

Now, there's no universal timeline. You move how you want to. But I feel like sometimes we're not paying attention to the energies that the opposite person is pouring into us or lack thereof, honestly, and when you aren't receiving and you aren't getting any of that good energy, any of that good time, that good effort communication. If you're not getting none of that, why are you giving some of you? Make it make sense? Like, uh, come on now, like is the dating pool really trash? Or

are you just giving yourself away too soon? Are you giving your money away too soon? Are you giving your body away too soon? Come on down, accountability, Let me know right what time is that shot? Okay? All right, y'all, So let's recap first New Year's say me, same bullshit. It is what it is. But I have had a chance to

reflect and notice some spots that I have grown in. And when we talked about growth, I realized that I'm not gonna order beer on a first date anymore because I don't want a man to call me Hank Hill in his group chat with his friends, and I said whatever. I also noticed that sometimes I be annoy and harassing niggas that I don't even really want to be with. I'll just be worried. Well, I used to, I used to.

I don't do that nowhere. I used to. Also, when women go on trips, the reason they come back not friends is because somebody was broke or ho. I also realized that a lot of you men aren't Polly. You just have fomo. You're missing out and women love when you take that initiative and plan things on mal of time's day. And in order to put someone back in the friend zone after you had sex, the easiest way is just to tell them you don't want to do anything else other than be

friends. And lastly, there's never there's no such thing as too soon on spoiling a woman as long as that woman is pouring back into you the same way you are pouring into her. Don't forget February seventeenth, Chocolate Chip and Sid a live taping, which means you can ask these questions or write in these questions live and get your shit off live. Okay, One thing about me baby, I'm gonna start a conversation. Okay, if you want to

be a part of this conversation, now is your chance. February seventeenth, Philly World Cafe Live. We got Chocolate Chip and Sip live taping and you want to be there. We got games, prizes, giveaways, dope conversations and even more amazing people. Okay, click the link on my bio and get your tickets right now, or you can go to stormypa dot com. I can't wait to see you guys. I'm so excited. My message is

always gonna be the same. Follow me on the Gram at Stormy p p EA at Chocolate Chip and Set. And if you don't remember anything else, please remember what would Kura do. I love you, guys, and I see you next week. Peace,