Hello, Hello everyone, Happy Monday. Today is May twentieth, which means we're almost halfway through the year. There's about six months left in twenty twenty four. That is crazy. So I hope you guys use that time wisely and work towards accomplishing your goals. And that actually brings me to the topic for this week's episode. It's something I've been wanting to talk about for a while, and I want to talk about the importance of rest.
So let's get into it.
This is Cheeky's and chill okay, guys, So I know it's important to work hard and to be disciplined and focused in order to reach your goals.
Yes, we know that.
We see it everywhere, you know, especially like on social media. That hustling or hustler mentality, should I say, and I completely agree with that. Yes, I'm all for it. But there's another side to that, and that is rest. The importance of rest, you guys. I cannot stress enough how important it is, telling you guys from experience, and I think that that's the best place to speak from is from experience, and I think I'm going to start there before we get into everything and why I feel it's
super important. I'm going to try to make this short and sweeten to the point. In twenty eighteen, I had a meltdown. I had to take a break. I think I've mentioned this a few times on the pod. For about three months from social media, I was working a lot, and I'm grateful.
No, my was stuck a hatam.
I don't like to complain about the amount of work that I have because I love to work.
I love to be busy.
I myself put a lot of things on my plate because now I know how to handle it, you know. But before I was starting my music career, things were going really well. I was going through a lot personally in my personal life, and my career was doing good.
I had about seventy six I remember it was about seventy six close to eighty shows nightclubs, okay, And I was working a lot, and I think I was just trying to spec Towards the end of that tour, which was the apochim A tour, I wasn't getting enough rest, I mean, especially doing nightclubs, which I'm so grateful for those moments and those shows because they helped me prepare for what I'm doing now. So I felt like that was my footwork. I really had to do that in
order to grow. It gave me the opportunity to grow and get to know myself as an artist. But I didn't know the importance of rest. I was just working, working, working, And then it got to the point where I was like, I'm just trying to numb everything. I'm just trying to get through this, and I'm just going to drink. And I was drinking a lot, and I was drinking excessively to get through the shows, and I was suppressing feelings.
I was obviously missing my mom. I had to stop going to therapy, I had to stop going to church because my shows were on the weekend. So a lot of these shows would start, I kid you not around twelve am,
one am, two am. Sometimes I wouldn't get off stage until like three four, and then I would do meet and greets, and I wouldn't go to sleep until five and in the morning, six in the morning, and because we had to go with something eight afterwards, you know, and then we would wake up and neither drive to the next city or fly and I just was not getting enough rest and it was driving me nuts. I felt it in my skin in my body. I was
gaining a lot of weight. This is all before I figured out my whole thyroid issue, my hormones, everything, everything was just all out of whack.
So I met.
A couple who are pastors, Javier and Cynthia Buelna. I met them through my sister Jackie and she told me about them. I went to their church and he started mentoring me, and I was just telling him how I was feeling. And that's who told me that rest was a part of my job, that it was just as important as all my shows. That I needed to speak to the team and I needed to take matters into
my own hands and take control of my career. That I was the leader, and that yes I had a team and they're important, but that I had to speak up. And I was very afraid to speak up. Then I was still trying to get out that whole thing of being a people pleaser, and I was like, no, I got to work. This is what I have to do. I have to work really hard in order to make it. And like I just felt this immense fucking pressure, so I wouldn't speak up. I just say, Okay, well this
is what I got to do. I mean, I saw my mom do it. I saw my family do it, like this is how it has to be done. So when I had this conversation with him, I had an epiphany.
I saw the light. I was like, oh my gosh, and I started thinking about, yes, my family are very hard working, all of them, my grandpa, my grandma, all my uncles, my mother, my mom didn't even know how to take vacations, you guys, Like my mom was all about work, work, work, work, and even if we were on vacation, she was on her BlackBerry, texting, answering emails. And that's what I felt that life had to be. Until I had a meltdown and I was like, enough
is enough. I can't do this. I remember telling my assistant. Then I was like, take me to the hospital. I need to go to the hospital, like I felt like I needed to rest. The only way I was going to rest if I was like submitted into like some type of sanctuary of peace, or take me to the hospital. I literally told her that. I stopped her on the freeway and I was having an anxiety check. I said, I can't do this, like I feel like I'm gonna die.
Like it was the craziest feeling ever. So anyways, thank goodness for who I now call Javier and Cynthia, who I now call mom and dad. They really helped me just see things in a different way. And going back to what I was saying was I started thinking and realizing that my family, as much as I admire their hard work, my grandpa never really knew how to take vacations or how to relax. It's just like we would wake up at five in the mornings, four in the morning,
and it was just it's great. I think waking up, you know, the five am club, you guys, is great, don't get me wrong, But I feel like there wasn't enough balance. And I started realizing that I didn't want to be that way, that I wanted to live a healthier life. I wanted to feel good and I wanted to enjoy what I was doing, and in order to enjoy I had to take a few steps back and rest.
And I'm telling you all of this because this is why I'm so passionate about this subject and I wanted to share it with you guys, because I went through it and I know what it feels like to have a breakdown, to have you know what I mean, And I've seen and I've.
Heard a lot of artists that go through it as well.
And I'm like, if I can help people prevent and not feel guilty more than anything, not only prevent them from having a meltdown of their own, but for us not to feel guilty. I felt guilty, and I realized I was feeling guilty. I was like, oh my god, if I'm not as hard working as my mom or my grandpa, I'm not going to be successful. And I had this like crazy ass pressure and now I'm so much happier, you guys. I spoke to my team and I told them, guys, I can't do this, Like I
need to take a break. I'm going to take a break from everything, like in order for me to just see where I want this career, my singing career to go, I need to take freaking ten steps back and reevaluate everything and analyze it and reflect. And I need to stay away from social media because I don't want to see what anyone else is doing because it gives you you get fomo, you.
Know what I mean.
You're like, oh my god, I'm not doing what I think I should be doing, you know, what I mean. So I did that and it really helped me. And when I did that, I came back and I knew what I wanted. I'm like, Okay, Sundays and Mondays, I want to be off. I want to do whatever makes me happy. I want to clean my house. I want to just sit on the couch if that's what I feel.
Like doing that day.
I want to freaking read a book. I want to ride a bike, anything and everything. And it's no one's business what I do on those days. And there was a little bit of like, huh, you know, well Sundays or shows and this and that. Yeah, that's fine, let's have shows Thursdays and Fridays or Fridays and Saturdays, and on Sundays, I'll be flying back and I could just do whatever I want. And they didn't necessarily like it,
but I didn't care. I felt stronger than ever I had come back, and I was like, I never want to feel what I felt. And this is when I started applying rest and whether some of my team feels that now I take too many breaks or too many I have too many vacations, Like, I don't care. I have never been happier. You guys. Even if I don't go away somewhere to a resort, I'm at home. I
want to clean my house. And it might sound weird, but I want to do things that bring me joy to my life, that helped me feel that balance of Yes, I'm an artist, but I'm also a woman, and I want to do things that make me happy. And having a clean house and washing my own clothes and cooking in my own kitchen makes me happy. And sitting on my couch watching whatever the heck I want to watch
and I don't care. Before I was so afraid of, like, I have to measure up and I'm telling you, guys, even if it's a day, even if it's a few hours. I know everyone's schedule is different. I knowpe some people work and go to school at the same time. And I commend you. I think it's a beautiful thing to be hard working, to be a hustler. But there's a big difference between that and just chasing the rat race of life, you know, and being stuck in it and
not stopping and smelling the roses. And I mean literally stopping and smelling the roses literally and not so literally obviously, but like even those little things that we sometimes don't value and we don't see those little things in life that make a huge difference. Because I was like that for a long time. I was just so focused and so honed in that I would not look around and realize, oh my god, how beautiful the trees are or how blue the sky is today. You just little things that
we can appreciate. So even like little things like that, that's taking a break, that's taking a breather, getting out of the office and on your lunch break, like not being on social media, like just sitting and eating and being present.
You know, there's so much power in that and it brings you back to you.
Some of you may be asking yourselves, Okay, well how do I fit this my schedule? Like I'm busy, I'm a mom. You can and I don't want to hear I don't have enough time, because a lot of us say that, oh I didn't have enough time. No, we have time. We have to make time. Whatever is our priority, and you rest should be your priority because if not, you're gonna start resenting your job. You're gonna start resenting your boss, You're gonna start resenting your children, your husband,
your friends, like, it could be anything and everything. It could be, Okay, I'm gonna work Monday through Friday, and on Saturday, I'm gona hang out with friends, and on Sunday I'm gonna do absolutely nothing. It could be that, or it could be I want to have an active rest day instead of sitting or laying in bed all day. I'm gonna go take a bike ride, I'm gonna go walk around, anything to just kind of get yourself out of the reality of your job and that pressure of society.
And you have to be intentional. And again, we talk about this word intentional a lot on this podcast, and someone asked me the other day on Dear Cheeky's what do you mean by being intentional? And I kept thinking, I'm like, did I explain it correctly? So anyways, I want to explain it again here. Being intentional also means doing things with intention that don't come natural to you. You know, things that come natural or just they come natural.
It's easy to do. But when you're being intentional about something, you make the space, you make the room to do whatever it is that you want to do. It's that's what I mean by being intentional, like not forcing yourself, but really being proactive and saying I'm going to make these changes because I want to see a change, a positive change in my life. That's being intentional, living with intent, not just living to live and a betriqua pasa, let's
see what happens. It's like, no, I have the key to my destiny, and every day I have choices, and if I make the correct choice and I choose this path instead of this one, then things are going to turn out better. My destiny's going to be better. That's what I mean about being intentional. So you have to tell yourself and everyone around you needs to understand. I am not gonna take phone calls. And I keep telling
my manager this Richard Bull. I was like, you really need to rest because this guy works so much, and I've told him myself, Hey, you need to chill, Like you need to go away with your wife and just be and f the phone and f the emails. It's okay for one day to put your phone down and just be and not feel guilty for just sitting by the pool tanning and having a drink. Don't feel guilty about that. So many people feel guilty. I feel guilty, and we shouldn't because if we don't regenerate, if we
don't re energize, revitalize our bodies. That's why the doctor always says you need anywhere from six to eight hours of sleep, and eight is the best because we need our body, our cells, our brain needs the rest in order for us to be our best selves. Literally, our cells, our organs, everything in order for our body to function and not get sick and not break down and not
create diseases. Rest is super important and essential. And also obviously this taking time away from your everyday life and saying, okay, even if it's once a month, you guys, it doesn't have to be once a week. What I do is okay, I'll work really hard for two weeks and then for two days. On the third week, I'm like, peace out, you guys. I need a break because if not, I'm
gonna start resenting my work. And I don't want to because I love what I do and I want to go into the studio and record songs and start my tour and do it with love and be excited about it because I'm all about working hard, and I will work hard, and I will work hours, and I will go the extra mile. That's who I am. But I've learned that if I don't take at least two days or a day to do absolutely nothing or to do only what makes me happy. Like the other day, I
told everyone, leave me alone. It's Sunday. I'm gonna go see Emilio's grandma. I want to hang out with his mom. We're gonna go eat, and we're gonna go walk around Santa Monica Promenade. And that's what I did, and I was so freaking happy. I had no makeup on it, my hair and a ponytail. I put on some sweats. I was completely Jeanne. I took a break from Cheeky's, took off the extensions, put no makeup on, and I just went and I was just living and I needed it so badly.
And then what did I do? The next day?
I flew out to New York and I was there and I worked as soon as I got there. The next day, I was working all day until like eleven PM, and I had woken up like at six am. And I was fine because I was like, oh, I had a beautiful day that fulfilled me and it re energized me. And right before the tour, I'm going to take a little vac with the media for his birthday.
And why in the.
Heck is someone going to be like, oh, she takes so many vacations. First of all, I was none your business. You're not paying my vacation, and you should do it too. It doesn't have to be I don't know, fly somewhere, like to a beach or to like a fancy island. It could be in your backyard. Paradise is where you make it, you guys. Paradise is in your mind. Paradise
is what you consider paradise. I'm super happy ever since I've made this change, and I've applied this to my life and to be honest in my personal life with like Emilio right now that we're going to take these days off for his birthday because I start my tour the week of his birthday. So I was like, Okay, let me find some days in my schedule because those things are important to me, because I don't want him to feel neglected, because I love him, because he has
a priority in my life. My siblings are a priority in my life. My friends are too, And I'll find some time in my schedule to say hey, girls, A month in advance, I have this day, do you guys want to go to dinner? Because those are the things that make me happy and it strengthens my relationships with these people that I love and going back to a medium, I did this, I think in the beginning of the year because I knew I was going to have a very busy year, and that's what I did. I said,
I want to celebrate him on his birthday. And I had a conversation with him in the beginning of the year as well, and I said, Hey, this year is
going to be crazy. We set this whole plan and I said, we're probably not going to be able to vacate as much as we have in the past, but I want you to know that I'm going to make it a point to spend time with you, quality time, because we've had that issue in the beginning of our relationship where it was like I was on my phone a lot, working and he's like, hey, like I want us to be at dinner and for you to give me your undivided attention, and I'm like, shit, I didn't
even realize I was doing that. And those are things that I used to really dislike that my mom would do and I'm like, damn, like okay, Like I want to be present and it does make our relationship stronger and he feels like appreciated and that's important to me. So what I've done is like, these are my priorities, and I have literally made a list you guys, of
things that make me happy. What makes me happy. Going to church, spending time with my siblings, spending time with my partner, spending time with his family, going to dinner with my friends.
I like it.
I like to go and just talk and just chit chat, you know what I mean, chitchat and just call it she's mad, whatever it is. But I love to have that go mad day time with my friends and have a little drink, reading a book, like anything that's important.
There's times where I'm like, well what do I do?
I'm like, I have so much time on my hands right now because I have a rest a And then I look at my list and I'm like, oh, okay, cool, I can do this. I can do that, And it's helped me because those things are my priority and those are the things that bring my life joy. And I want the people that are in my life that I love and that are important to me to know that they're important to me and to feel it. Not just for me to say it, but I want to show
them with actions. And I suggest that you guys do that to really figure out who are the people that I love to be around, What are the things that really bring my life color? Make a list, and whenever you forget or whenever you don't know what to do, fit those things into your schedule. Don't just work work, work, work and live live live live, and then you're like
working to live and not living to enjoy. And I feel like now more than ever, we see that everywhere it's like hustle, hustle, hustle, Like yes, but I also have to live. I have to enjoy the things that I'm creating, you know what I mean, the money I'm making, Like I have to we have to figure out a way to say, Okay, like maybe I can't go on this elaborate trip, but I can take this extra little money that I have a month, and I'm gonna, I don't know, go to a museum. I have no idea,
you know what I mean? Like anything that brings you joy. Basically that's a big word on this episode right now.
You guys. Joy.
Joy is priceless. Joy has no price tag, like that's free. But we need to also find it and seek it and do things to grasp it, you know, not to lose that joy and feeding that inner child in us. You know, we all have an inner child, like don't ignore it, don't neglect it. And if you're listening to this podcast right now and you're kind of wondering, okay, well, Cheeky's how do I know when I'm feeling burnt out
or when I need a break? I think some easy indications are when you're moody and irritable, when you are looking for Friday to come around because you can can't wait to have a drink and just get drunk and forget about everything. That's another indication. And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with drinking and socially drinking and having fun because I like to do that.
But I have.
Learned that I don't want to use alcohol to numb whatever it is i'm feeling or thinking. I want to work through it and like be raw with it. I want to use and drink alcohol to enjoy and to say I just want to have a good time and I want to feel good, not to numb things. That's a huge indication. That was my first indication where I was like, shit, I'm drinking excessively and it's because I just want to get through the show and I just want to get through the weekend. And it makes everything fun.
It gives you that liquid courage, you know. So that's an indication. Also, if you're getting a lot of headaches, if you feel like your head is about to explode, that means, okay, wait, let me come back to myself, let me look inward. Obviously, drink a lot of water and all that stuff. But if you're getting constant headaches and you have tension headache, so that means you're stressed out,
then that means you need to take a break. And if you can't take a break because you have a nine to five or you have to work every day, like I'm telling you guys, even taking deep breaths and like stepping out of the office or out of the situation you're in and just taking profound deep breaths and just saying, Okay, this is my mental break, I'm gonna be fine, Like breathing intentionally, not just breathing like I'm breathing in right now, but breathing intentionally, taking really deep
breaths from your diaphragm, from your tummy. It clears your head, It helps you so much. That's taking a mental break. Sometimes when I'm feeling a little irritable or I'm not as like when i don't have that pep in my step and I'm not like joyful doing what I'm doing, I'm like, okay, wait a second, like what's going on? It could be even as easy as working out, taking a little walk, like moving our body does so much. Yes, we want to work out and look better, but more
than anything, you want to feel better. And working out and just taking a little walk a little stroll gets your mind off of so many things. It releases dopamine and that makes you happier. So that's another indication. If you're feeling a little like your mind is feeling a little too clustered, then that means you need to work out your body to balance it out. If your body's feeling tired, then you need to work out your brain, which means like you know, reading a book or doing
something that simulates your mind. So those are like indications of like, Okay, something's going on. I'm at a balance and it's okay because it happens to all of us. It still happens to me. I just now know, oh shit, okay, maybe I need a rest. And for a long time I didn't know that, or I didn't know that. It's a part of my job. It's a part of our job. It's a part of our responsibility, and it's part of taking care of our body, our temple that was really
just lend to us. Our body is like we got to do things to keep it functioning correctly, and rest is huge. You guys, look it up. If you don't believe me, go google it. Google it and it'll show you not only is sleep important, but also taking a mental break. And this is why I wanted to talk about it so much, because I've been want to talk
about this for a while. But I feel like a lot of us, a lot of people now more than ever, we have more depression, more anxiety, more diseases because we have this idea of the only way I'm going to be successful is if I work twenty four to seven and there are no rest days, you know, no rest days like this and that, Like you see all that stuff on Instagram. I know you guys do I've seen it, and I'm just like, damn, yes, you're probably gonna get
really far. But then you're gonna get there and you're gonna be like fuugh, You're not gonna enjoy it. And why not enjoy the journey the way to your destination, you know what I mean? Like, why enjoy it? Stop and say wow, all right, this is nice and keep on going and then take another little break and then look the sky and then walk a little bit more. There's no reason to have the run all the time, like you can't walk and enjoy. That's the easiest way
I could put it. You guys, walk, enjoy, take your time, pace yourself. Don't just like ah, I want everything so quick. We live in that world if it's just like quick, quick, quick, everything quick. I want the magic pill. I want this, I want that. Like, enjoy the damn journey, trust the process. Take care of yourself while you're doing it. Love yourself enough to say, dude, I'm gonna do me right now. I'm gonna love myself. I'm gonna have some self care,
some self love. There's nothing wrong with it. Because you can't give yourself to anyone, or to your job or to anything that you're doing. If you are not aligned, if you are not happy with yourself. I say this a lot on the podcast too, but it's true self care self love hand in hand.
Guys.
So with that being said, I will close our episode and hopefully something resonated with you, because this podcast is all about helping, in any way possible, inspiring and empowering for you to become your best self, whether you are a woman or a male. I am speaking to the human within you. I am very grateful for each and every one of you, guys, and I love that you come and you listen to Cheeky's and chill and dear cheekys, and I'm just so grateful. I can't say it enough.
So thank you for listening to this episode. I hope you enjoyed it. Share it with someone that you feel may need to listen to this, and even if they don't share it, come on show us some love, all right, guys. Well, I love you, and have a beautiful week. Kick ass and take a mental break if you need it. Remember that there's nothing wrong with taking care of yourself. Okay, let's all take a deep breath together.
And you let it out.
Love you vesitos. I will see you on the next episode of Cheeky's and Chill. Do you need advice on love of relationships health emails? I'm so excited to share with you that my Cheeky's and Chill podcast will have an extra episode drop each week. I'll be answering all your questions. Just leave me a voice message Monday. All you have to do is go to speak pipe dot com, slash Cheeky's and Chill podcast and record your questions.
I can't wait to hear from you.
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